


The Man Of My Dreams

by DustyAttic



Category: SKAM (TV)
Genre: Absent Parents, Anxiety, Attempted Rape, Bipolar Disorder, Cuddles, Cuties, Eating Disorders, Fluff, Gets dark in later chapters, M/M, Ouija Board, SOS, Sexual Assault, Sleepy babies, Smut, Still loads of fluff though!, canon-compliant UP TO S3, my boyss, so many, they're so in love send help, trigger warnings in notes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-10
Updated: 2017-07-07
Packaged: 2018-09-16 17:00:36
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 72
Words: 158,444
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9281354
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DustyAttic/pseuds/DustyAttic
Summary: “Ugh, Magnus is right,” groaned Mahdi, “you two are gross.”“Don’t be jealous, Mahdi,” Isak mumbled, pulling Even down by the back of his neck, fingers tangled in his hair, for a second kiss.Jonas returned with the beer and Isak and Even pulled apart. For the rest of the evening, the boys talked and laughed. They gave Magnus their best relationship advice and told Even all sorts of stories of dumb things Isak had done before they knew each other. When it was dark and the other boys were filing out, Even looked down at the smaller boy in his lap. “Home?” he asked.Isak nodded. “Home.”ORA continuation of Isak and Even's life together. Fluff, smut, angst, everything. Will get dark. Also gets very light. Please pay attention to chapter notes<3





	1. Chapter one

Chapter 1  
They were at Jonas’s place. Eva, Chris, Vilde, Sana, Noora and some of the others had started hanging around with Isak and his friends more often, but, today, it was just him, Mahdi, Magnus, Jonas and Even.  
All the boys except Isak and Magnus were enthralled in their game of FIFA, shouting out to each other and getting overly excited at a goal or a great save. Magnus was equally enthralled in the conversation he was having, mostly with himself, about Anette, his new girlfriend. They'd all been beyond shocked when she'd agreed to go out with him, but she was a short, cheerful, often sarcastic little redhead with a big smile. They were happy for Mags.  
“She’s just so, like, perfect, you know? Like her skin is so pretty and milky and soft and she’s so funny and sexy, just everything about her is-” here he made vague hand gestures before exclaiming, again, “perfect!”  
“Ach, dude, you’re going to make me sick!” Mahdi muttered, eyes glued to the screen.  
“Seriously, you have taken desperate beyond a new level,” added Jonas. “This is toxic desperate. If Anette asked you to move planets, you’d give it a go.”  
“What, so Isak is allowed to be sickeningly in love, but not me?” Magnus sputtered.  
Isak, who had, before this point, been laying on the couch with his head in Even’s lap, staring up at the older boy’s face as he concentrated on the game, now looked towards Magnus. “Sickeningly?” he asked with mock-anger. “I think you’re more in love with Even than I am! You do ask him for advice about everything... Maybe you two are having a secret relationship and I’m just sleuthing it out.” He shrugged.  
“Wh-I don’t ask- we are not-” Magnus stuttered, face red, but Even only chuckled.  
“You’ve caught us,” he said, glancing down at Isak, who smirked and drew in his brows. God, that boy is exquisite, thought Even. Instead of voicing his thought, however, he continued, “Magnus and I have been seeing each other for months now. We only, er, created his relationship with Annette, and mine with you, to hide it.”  
“Yeah,” Magnus agreed, going along with it now. “We’re getting married soon, and, like, you aren’t even invited.” He seemed unable to smoothly keep up a joke, always fumbling it into something no longer plausible.  
Isak didn’t mind. He just laughed and said, “No? I’m not invited?” His eyes were on Even, who shook his head with a small smile.  
Suddenly, a whistle blew from the TV, signaling the end of the game. Jonas and Even let out cheers while Mahdi swore and tossed his controller onto the couch.  
“Did you see that?” Even said quietly to Isak, while Jonas got up to grab some beer. “Did you see me win that for you?”  
“Hm, for me?” Isak replied, raising his eyebrows. “I thought it was for Brazzzilll!” He whispered the last word like a cheering crowd.  
“No,” Even said back, grinning so much his eyes were almost slits, “it was for you.” He leaned down, almost but not quite bumping noses with Isak, who propped himself up on his elbows.  
“That was nice,” he said, rubbing their noses together.  
“Yeah?”  
“Yeah. You’re so nice.” Isak sighed the last sentence and tilted his chin towards Even, asking for his lips. The older boy smiled impossibly wider and complied, giving Isak a long, lingering kiss.  
“Ugh, Magnus is right,” groaned Mahdi, “you two are gross.”  
“Don’t be jealous, Mahdi,” Isak mumbled, pulling Even down by the back of his neck, fingers tangled in his hair, for a second kiss.  
Jonas returned with the beer and Isak and Even pulled apart. For the rest of the evening, the boys talked and laughed. They gave Magnus their best relationship advice and told Even all sorts of stories of dumb things Isak had done before they knew each other. When it was dark and the other boys were filing out, Even looked down at the smaller boy in his lap. “Home?” he asked.  
Isak nodded. “Home.” 

After the New Year, Even had gone into a depression. It wasn’t as bad as they could be, but he ended up spending much more time than not at the flat, lying in Isak’s bed and hardly speaking. Isak would bring him whatever he needed, sometimes even coax him out from under the covers to watch a movie on the couch. He would ask questions and try to understand sometimes, others he would just be quiet. He was always there, though. Always with the right touch, the right whisper of love. Always there.  
Once the darkness passed, Even went back to his parent’s house, but it didn’t feel like home anymore. Mrs. Bech Næsheim was sad when Even told her he was moving out, but she adored Isak and wished only for her son’s happiness. Eskild didn’t make him pay rent- he claimed it was because he and Isak shared a room anyway, but everyone knew it was because he had a soft spot for Even. Everyone did.  
And, so, when the two boys got home from Jonas’s around nine at night on a warm, late-spring evening, they went to their room and fell into their bed.  
“I’m wiped out from this week,” Isak said, staring up at the ceiling and referring to the rough week of testing they just had.  
“I’m sorry,” Even said softly, scooching over to smooth back Isak’s curls. The younger, smaller boy, glanced at him and tried to hide his smile.  
“I love you,” he whispered, rolling onto his side and curling into Even’s waiting embrace.  
Even kissed the top of his head. “I love you, too.”  
They stayed like that for a while. After ten minutes or so, though, Eskild was pounding on their door.  
“Isak! Even!” he shouted. “You two better not be having sex in there because I’m coming in!”  
Isak let out a soft groan and buried his face in Even’s shoulder as the door opened. “Okay, good,” Eskild said upon seeing that they were not, indeed, having sex. “We’re going to watch a movie, and you two need to get out of this room because it still stinks, even though Even bought you air freshener.”  
Isak moaned, flopping onto his back. But Even only chuckled and began to get up, holding out one hand for his grumpy boyfriend. “I’ll spoon you on the couch, too, don’t worry,” he laughed when Isak didn’t move. This got the younger boy’s attention, and he hopped up, giving Eskild a reason to roll his eyes.  
“Don’t be so needy!” he complained, making Isak huff. Eskild stormed out of their sight with a “Linn! We’re watching a family movie, get out of bed!”  
“I am not needy,” Isak brooded, following Even to the living room, where Noora was waiting with a bowl of popcorn and, of course, a smile. Isak worried she was too sweet for her own good.  
The movie was old but good. Linn and Eskild spent its entirety making comments on unrealistic parts, while Noora shushed them and asked if they could do better. Even, of course, had seen it already, and was adorably excited to discuss every minor detail, from random tidbits of fact he knew about it to the score to the camera work. Isak was content to watch all this go down, butting in occasionally with comment of his own, but he eventually dozed off while the others continued to enjoy the film.  
At the end of the night, Noora, Linn and Eskild filed back to their rooms while Even sat on the couch and fiddled with Isak’s curls, simultaneously trying to wake him and trying not to. No matter, though, after a couple minutes Isak’s eyes fluttered open and he looked at his boyfriend. “What time is it?” he asked groggily.  
“Almost midnight. Let’s go to bed, baby,” Even responded quietly. Isak groaned.  
“It’s so warm,” he whimpered, not wanting to move.  
“It’ll be warmer in bed,” Even argued, but Isak just groaned again. Suddenly, Even smiled hugely and stood with Isak still in his arms, picking him up newly-wed style. This shocked the younger boy completely awake and he gripped Even’s neck for dear life.  
“Wh-Even?! You could have killed me!” Isak sputtered. Even smiled and raised his eyebrows.  
“Killed you? How frail are you?”  
“That’s beside the point, you can’t just fling me around-” Isak was in the middle of his complaint when Even cut him off with a kiss. The younger boy quickly responded.  
When they pulled apart, their foreheads still touching, Isak was smiling. “Come on,” he said. “Take me to bed, and, for the next minute, we’ll kiss more.”  
Even nodded and carried his boyfriend to their bedroom, where they did kiss for the next minute. Isak layed on his back beneath the older boy, who hovered slightly above, and they wrestled tongues. Even traced Isak’s hips under his shirt and Isak ran his hands across Even’s smooth abs. After their minute, or few minutes, were up, they pulled away from each other and both smiled. It was late, and so, for the next several hours, they cuddled and spooned and slept.


	2. Chapter two

Chapter 2  
When Even woke up the next morning, Isak was, unsurprisingly, still asleep. He used to joke that Isak slept later than anyone he had ever known, but then Eskild had commented quietly to him about how much better Isak was sleeping now that they lived together. “Being the guru-advisor that I am, I like to make sure that all my little chicks are nicely in their nests, but when I used to check in on Isak… well he would rarely be asleep. On school nights I wouldn’t be surprised if he didn’t sleep at all… one or two hours at most…” Even had looked at him with raised eyebrows as Eskild put food away, trying to avoid eye contact, before continuing, “so, I’m just really glad… really glad he’s doing so well with you. More than just sleeping, actually,” at this, Eskild leaned back on the counter and clapped Even’s shoulder. “You’re really good for him.”  
Even had smiled and thanked Eskild and, as the older man walked away, said, “He’s really good for me, too.”  
So, now, when Even woke up and Isak was sleepily curled into his shoulder, he simply placed a light kiss to his temple and wiggled out of bed. He hopped in the shower after making sure that Noora, the only other person awake, didn’t need it. Then, once he was clean, Even started to make breakfast. That was one more thing that the flat loved about him, he always offered food to everyone, even if he had made it with only his and Isak’s share. Eskild always happily took part in whatever delicious meal Even had prepared, and Linn would, too, if she was around. It depended on Noora’s mood, but even she had to admit he was a great cook. Right now, Even prepped some laks, and began to fry some pancakes. He was facing away from the door when he felt a familiar weight fall against his back and familiar arms wrap around his waist.   
“Good morning,” Isak sighed into Even’s shirt, and the bigger man smiled.   
“Good morning,” he said back, turning to face his boyfriend, who was tousled with sleep, golden curls all over the place and face dazed. He tilted his chin up towards Even, who leaned down and kissed him before turning back to the pancakes and flipping them before they started to burn. Isak clung around his waist and shut his eyes.   
“Here,” Even said after a while, twisting and handing Isak a plate of food, “get the syrup and stuff, please.”  
Shuffling away, Isak got everything they would need and sat at the table. Even quickly sat across from him and watched as the younger boy began to eat his eggs. A smile crept over Even’s face as Isak pushed back his hair, trying to keep it out of his eyes.   
“What?” laughed Isak after a minute of Even smiling at him.  
“Nothing,” said Even, still grinning, “you’re just cute.”  
Isak huffed and rolled his eyes, but there was no hiding the smirk that took over his mouth. “What are you doing today?” he asked.  
“I don’t know, I might go visit my parents…” Even trailed, rubbing one eye. Isak nodded.   
“That’s chill,” he said. “I’ll probably swing by Jonas’s.”  
“That’s chill.”  
They ate in silence for a while, until Even was done and got up to clear his plate. Noora and Eskild walked out together in that moment, arguing about something.   
“Seriously, Noora, new you, new boyfriend,” Eskild was saying, to which Noora rolled her eyes.   
“For your information,” she said, trying to sound stern but obviously very happy about something, “William called last night. We had a very long talk and he said he hasn’t been with anybody since me, and that he still loves me and really wants to make it work.”  
“Serious?” asks Isak from the table, smiling up at the blonde. “Noora, that’s awesome!”  
Noora grins, red lipstick perfect. “Thank you. But I told him I needed some time to think, since it’s been so long and all. And he really did fuck things up last fall. I’m not just going to jump back into his arms.”  
“Oh, please, Noora,” Eskild groaned, “just give up and get back with him already.”   
Noora glared at him. “Eskild, I’m not going to let myself get in a relationship if I don’t think it’s good for me. I have to think it over.”  
“Do you still love him?” asks Even, leaning on their counter.   
Noora blushes slightly and looks down at her feet. “I… I think so? I don’t know. I think I’m still in love with the idea of him, you know? I’m still in love with the him that swept me off my feet last year. But it’s been so long since I really saw him, not just skype or messaging, that I don’t know if I still… still love him. This him.”  
Even nodded. “Is he going to come home?”  
“Yes,” Noora affirmed. “He’s coming for a visit in a couple of weeks. I told him I’d be ready to talk then. Once we’ve seen each other again. We’re still texting all the time, I just don’t have an answer yet. When he’s here, though, hopefully… well, hopefully I’ll be able to figure something out.”  
“That’s great, Noora,” Isak said, standing and clearing his dishes. “I’m gonna shower,” he announced. “I hope everything works out with you two.”  
With that, the slim boy wandered away towards the bathroom. Noora, Eskild and Even continued to talk, shifting topics from William to school to a variety of other things until they all eventually made their ways to their own corners of the house. Even walked into his room to find Isak in just a towel, rubbing his hair dry.   
“Halla,” the older boy said, smirking at Isak, who blushed.   
“Halla. When are you going to your mom’s?”   
“Possibly never with you looking this good,” Even purred, wrapping his arms around Isak’s waist and placing a soft kiss on his jaw.   
There were things about Isak that Even loved but would never tell anyone, except perhaps the blond himself. Things like how much Even loved how small Isak was. He loved his slim frame, the way his shoulders were so narrow. He loved how Isak would tuck his chin into his chest when he laughed or got embarrassed, and how he almost always hesitated before smiling but, when he didn’t, his smile would light up the whole world. He loved how Isak crossed his legs and wore skinny jeans and snapbacks because it was so him, all of it. He loved when Isak’s eyes blew up in surprise. He loved Isak so much.   
And, now, he loved how Isak giggled quietly and ran his hands through Even’s hair. “I’m trying to get dressed here,” he protested as Even began to suck on his neck.   
“That’s the opposite of what I want,” mumbled Even, pulling Isak’s hips close to him and running his hands over his boyfriend’s skin.   
“Baby,” Isak breathed quietly, his voice becoming needy as Even pushed his buttons. Even smiled against his skin and took a step back, causing Isak to let out a low whine.   
“What do you want?” Even asked, pressing his forehead to the smaller boy’s.   
Trying to steady his breathing, Isak blinked a couple of times. “Please,” he whimpered after a beat. “I need you.”  
That was all the invitation Even needed to press himself against Isak hard, pushing them both both onto the bed.


	3. Chapter three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! Thank you for the awesome feedback so far! This was inspired by something by friend said about Isak being the ultimate sugar baby, so... here we go!

Chapter 3  
The thing about Even was that he was a romantic. No doubt about it. He was hopeless.   
That was how he ended up spoiling Isak so rotten that the younger boy lost sight of his pampering all together.Of course he appreciated every small gesture that Even made with all of his heart, but sometimes he forgot that being so spoiled wasn't just normal relationship stuff. He forgot that some boyfriends wouldn't surprise him with presents and kisses and let him sleep in their lap or skip class just because he was feeling horny. He forgot about it until one day, at lunch, when the boys pointed out just what a sugar baby Isak had truly become.   
"Shit," Isak mumbled as he sat down.  
"What's wrong, babe?" Asked Even immediately, brushing back some of the smaller boy's golden curls.   
"Nothing," sighed Isak, "I just forgot to grab a bottle of water."   
"I got you," Even said, quickly kissing Isak's cheek before hooping up to save the day.  
"There goes your sugar daddy" Mahdi joked, rolling the last two words off his tongue in English. Isak drew his eyebrows and scoffed.  
"My what?"   
At this, Magnus rolled his eyes. "Come on, dude. You can't not see how much he pampers you."   
Still confused, Isak turned to Jonas. "It's true, bro," his best friend admitted. "Even spoils you."  
"I am not spoiled," Isak huffed, adjusting his SnapBack.   
"Okayyyy," Magnus drawled, laughing. "It's not like you have new Beats. Or the most recent FIFA. Or meals cooked for you everyday. Or..." his gaze drifted behind Isak "your water gotten for you."   
Just then, Even sat back down, handing Isak the bottle, who took it with a slight frown. Even laughed a little before kissing the pout away, which, for the record, didn't really help Isak's situation.   
"So," the older blond said. "What did I miss?" 

That evening, when they were both at home, Even knew something was up. He knew it from the way Isak avoided his eyes and bit down on his smiles before letting them get too big. When Even went to kiss him and Isak awkwardly chuckled and swiveled his head away, Even stopped. "Isak," he said, "what's wrong? You've been acting weird since lunch."  
Still trying to avoid eye contact, Isak blushes. He takes a deep breath before mumbling, "I... do you pamper me? I mean, I know you're amazing to me, but do you... spoil me?"   
At this, Even let out a laugh. "Is that all your worried about?" He asked, tilting Isak's chin up. "Well, the answer is yes, I try to, at least."   
Isak was cornered on the countertop and trying to keep Even's hands on his lap from moving any closer to his crotch. "Why?" He asked. "I don't want to be a sugar baby." He said that last two words in English, as Mahdi had.   
"Sugar baby?" Even imitated. "What's wrong with that?"   
Rolling his eyes, Isak brushed back some of his hair. "Nothing, I just don't want you to feel like I don't appreciate you or that your obligated to treat me this way."   
At this, Even smiled wide. "I don't feel obligated," he whispered, pressing his hips to Isak's. "I just love seeing you smile. And I like treating you like the beautiful person you are."   
With the words, Even continued to get closer to Isak. He began to press his lips against the younger boys neck and trail soft kisses along his jaw. Isak tried not to whine as he said, "But it's so public. Doesn't it embarrass you?"   
"Does it embarrass you?" Even countered. Isak scrunched his nose briefly before saying, "No, but it makes me feel weird. Like people think I push you around."   
At this, Even pulled back. "Isak," he said quietly. "I love that people see us. I like that they know how happy you make me."   
"But just because I make you happy doesn't mean you have to treat me like this. Doesn't it weird you out that people think you're, like, my sugar daddy?"  
"I want people to know that you're mine," Even said suddenly, looking Isak dead in the eye.   
"What?"  
"I want people to see you in the things I bought for you and see me treating you like the amazing boy you are and see that you're mine."   
Even was leaning his forehead against Isak's by this point. The small boy bit his lower lip.   
"Do you like that?" Even purred, beginning to gently palm Isak through his pants and he spoke softly against his neck. Isak's breathing grew shallow as he started to whimper. "You like when I make you mine? Bruise you, take you. You like that?"  
Bucking his hips, Isak buried his head in Even's neck. "Yes," he panted. "Yes, I love it. I want you so bad, baby."   
Even bit his way along Isak's jaw. "I can tell," he chuckled softly as he felt Isak's hardness. "You're so easy."   
"Mm," Isak moaned as Even continued sucking and licking his way down. "God you're so fucking hot."  
At this, Even pulled away from Isak's neck and pressed their mouths together, grabbing the younger boy by the ass and pulling him closer. Isak moaned into Even's mouth and wrapped his legs around his waist. "Bed," he choked out. "Please." He sounded so needy. Even was a goner.   
"Okay," he hummed, lifting Isak and carrying him towards their room. Once they got their, he tossed the smaller boy onto the bed and stood over him. "Mm, you look so pretty, baby," he sighed as Isak's eyes grew darker and more out of focus.   
Thrusting his pelvis up towards Even, Isak whimpered. He fumbled with his belt buckle, trying to get rid of his pants. "Too many clothes," he groaned.   
Chuckling, Even whipped off his shirt, and then helped undress Isak before taking off his own pants. He began to kiss up Isak’s naked torso, hovering over him as he left marks along his chest. Once he reached Isak’s mouth, the smaller boy grabbed the back of his head and brought their mouths together. “Even,” he moaned loudly as Even sucked on his jaw. Isak pushed his hardness against his boyfriend’s thigh.   
“Do you want me?” Even said lowly, and Isak nodded.   
“Please.”  
Happily obliging, Even flipped Isak onto his back. “I can never resist giving you what you want,” he sighed. “On your knees.” 

The next morning, Isak was sitting next to Sana in bio when he took off his scarf. She pursed her lips, bringing out her signature dimples, and raised one eyebrow at him.   
“What?” asked Isak.   
“Nothing,” Sana said. “You’ve just been very… busy this weekend.” She gestured vaguely to his neck and Isak blushed, immediately putting his scarf back on.


	4. Chapter four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Because I'm 90% certain Isak has an anxiety disorder.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, okay, this isn't so fluffy, but it's important to me and I hope you guys like it anyway!

Chapter 4  
“Evennn,” Isak groaned, laying on their bed scrolling through his phone. Even was across the room, writing something. He hummed in response, distracted by whatever he was working on.   
“Come lay with me.”   
Even smirked at the neediness in Isak’s voice before closing his notebook and walking to the bed. “Halla,” he said, wiggling beside Isak until the smaller boy laid his head on Even’s chest. Isak clicked off his phone and put on over Even’s belly button, shutting his eyes with a soft sigh. Running his hands through the younger boy’s hair, Even listened to Isak’s breathing even out as he fell asleep.   
Although Even was perfectly happy to lay with his beautiful boy, Isak was worrying him. He’d woken up late last night to the smaller boy climbing back into bed beside him. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you, Just had to pee,” Isak had mumbled, kissing Even’s cheek and sliding under the covers. Another time, Even had been startled out of a dream to find Isak staring up at the ceiling with wide eyes. As soon as he realized Even was awake, though, he pulled them shut and pretended he was asleep. Even could see the darkness under his eyes every morning that remained through the afternoon; he heard from Sana and Jonas and Mahdi how Isak fell asleep in class, stumbled through conversations, always ready with “I’m fine, just tired,” when asked the matter. And Even hated it. All of it.   
Isak would never admit it, but when he was asleep at 3 pm and awake at 3 am, there was obviously something wrong. 

It came to a breaking point the next day. Even was sitting with Magnus, Jonas and Isak at lunch. Mahdi had ditched them for waffles. Shockingly. But, anyway, Magnus was in the middle of some long, hideously boring story about Annette. Jonas and Even were laughing, but Isak was resting his head on his hand, cheek to palm, eyes flitting. Just as Even was getting caught up in the story, however, Isak’s chin came crashing down. He hit the table hard, eyes snapping open with a surprised, pained shout. As soon as they were all recovered from the shock, Even was immediately wrapping both arms around Isak. “Shit, babe, holey fuck! Are you okay?”   
Isak was rubbing his chin, which was red and cut open in one place, blinking rapidly. Even would guess he was trying not to cry, so he pulled him up by one hand and said, “Come on, let’s go get you cleaned up,” before Isak could say anything.  
Once they were in the bathroom, Even began to dab at Isak’s chin with toilet paper. Isak was still blinking, pushing Even’s hand away, “Stop, I’m okay, it’s fine.”   
“Isak, baby, it’s not fine,” Even argued, wiping away the tear that stained Isak’s cheek.   
Isak blushed. “I’m not cry- it just startled me. It’s involuntary.”   
Smiling just the tiniest bit, Even, shook his head. “Don’t be embarrassed, it’s okay. That hurt. A lot.” Here he took a pause. But, Isak… why aren’t you sleeping well?”  
Isak kept his eyes low. “I- I’m fine. It’s nothing.”  
And now Even frowned. More than anything, he hated when Isak wouldn’t talk to him. The older boy’s words began to tumble out of his mouth before he could stop them. “Is it me, or your parents, or… Eskild told me you used to have trouble sleeping but he never said why, he said it got better when I came, but now… I know how tired you are the time. Please talk to me.”  
Isak sighed, keeping his face turned towards the floor. “It’s not you. I just…”   
It always happened, after the panic overflowed into something that spilled from every part of him and he lost control of his body. Sleep abandoned him as quickly as his nerves.   
He didn’t like to call them episodes. Episodes sounded far too medical and there was really nothing wrong, he was just stressed and tired.   
The first time was so long ago he couldn’t remember it. He did remember the time he stumbled out of Jonas’s cabin at three am and gasped over the rail of the deck, sweat pooling on his forehead and dripping off his nose as he tried to catch his fucking breath but his stomach felt like rocks and his lungs weren’t working right because Elias was in their room calling him a fucking faggot and grabbing at his ass and telling him “You like it, right, fag?” as Isak pushed him away and Elias was laughing and rolling his eyes and saying, “Whatever, dude, I’m just messing around,” and he fell asleep but Isak couldn’t and didn’t and after a while passed he was trembling so violently that he stumbled out of Jonas’s cabin at three am.   
Eva came out for water. She saw him on the deck.   
“Isak?”   
“Hmm?” the boy hummed, shaking and trying to keep his bile from rising.   
Eva put one hand on his back. “Are- are you okay?” She could feel how his shirt clung to him.   
“Yeah,” Isak choked out.   
“Isak,” sighed Eva. She’d seen him like this before. Never this bad but she knew that he hurt more than he would tell anyone. “Isak, what’s wrong? Please.”  
“I just- Elias- he makes me a little- uncomfortable,” the boy stuttered. And Eva closed her eyes and drew him close to her and let him shake. They didn’t speak about it ever again. But she knew. And he knew. 

And Isak remembered when Eva had come to his house and Jonas had gone to the door and sent her away. When he came back, Isak was where he’d left him, in his room in one corner, face buried in his knees, sobbing out “I can’t- I just can’t- I can’t breathe and I- I just can’t anymore.”   
“Isak,” Jonas said, “I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry.”   
“I’m just so sick of this- I can’t do it anymore. It’s too hard.”  
“I’m sorry,” Jonas said, pressing the smaller boy’s golden curls into his shoulder. “I’m sorry. You’re right. It’s not fair. I’m sorry.”  
“I can’t breathe,” Isak hyperventilated.   
Jonas didn’t know what to say besides, “I’m here. I’m always here.”

He felt one coming on the night Eskild found him, so he drank and drank until it went away. But that didn’t stop them forever, just until the night in the basement, a few weeks later, when his mother’s bible verses just kept coming and he felt himself losing any control he’d ever had as he threw up onto the cold cement floor. “I’m sorry,” he told Eskild the next day. “I had too much to drink.”

And then the night that Even kissed Sonja at Emma’s party and he tried to hurt Mahdi because what else would asshole Isak Valtersen do but try to hurt the chillest, kindest dude around? Fucking asshole, that’s why he lost Even that’s why he lost everyone, that’s why he was throwing up onto the street now, again with the throwing up why did this keep happening Jesus fucking Christ he couldn’t fucking breathe. 

The one last week hadn’t been bad. Just Isak fogging up the bathroom mirror as he hyperventilated onto it for half an hour because he thought he heard somebody call him a fag under their breath and he wasn’t ashamed anymore but it made his vision go blurry. It wasn’t that bad but it still shook him to his core and sleep didn’t come easily after. So that’s how he ended up here with Even now, bloody chin and all. And when this all tumbled out, Even’s heart broke.   
“Isak,” he sighed, pulling the smaller boy into him tighter than anyone ever had.   
“I’m-it’s fine, I’m okay,” Isak muttered.   
“You’re not. You’re having panic attacks and insomnia,” argued Even.   
“No, it’s not- it’s not like that serious. I’m just stressed. I get stressed.”  
Even just kept holding on, pressing kisses into Isak’s hair. He didn’t want to upset him further but it killed Even to think of Isak hurting like that.  
And Even knew he had to get his boy help.


	5. Chapter five

Chapter 5  
Isak was laying in bed, staring up at the ceiling while Noora tried to study with him for French.   
"Ok, Isak, translate this sentence: J'échouerai mon examen de français si je ne commence pas faire attention."   
"I'm going to fail my..." as he got what Noora was implying, Isak shot her a look. "I am paying attention. French is just... boring."   
Noora rolled her eyes. "Yeah, well, tell that to Madame DeVos. I'm sure she'd love to hear it."   
"Yeah," Isak muttered in response, sounding distracted. Noora frowned. Isak had been being a grouch all day. She wondered what the matter was. As soon as she was about to ask, however, Eskild barged in.  
"Halla, children! Papa is home!" he said, swinging Isak's door back and forth. Both the high schoolers rolled their eyes this time.   
"Hei, Eskild," Noora sighed. "Can you please tell Isak that studying is important? He's being a real pain."   
"I am not! I have a 5+ in French, I don't think I'm going to fail this test!"  
"Whatever. Just stop being so grumpy. Where's Even, anyway? He hasn't been around all day, is that what's got you all crabby?"   
It was, in fact, the reason Isak was irritated. Even had been out with his parents the entire day. Usually Isak would go with them but Even said he wanted to have some alone time. Which was fine, except it meant Isak had to spend the entire day without his boyfriend. So, yes, that was why he was grumpy. Not that he'd ever tell that to Noora.   
"Nei," he mumbled, "I'm just tired. And Even is visiting his parents."   
"Aw, my little guru-baby is so needy," Eskild sighed.   
"I'm not needy," Isak huffed for what felt like the millionth time. Eskild smirked. "And don't pretend like you're not more into Even that I am."   
"True, but he's my favorite son! How could I not love him?!" Eskild asked, causing Isak to glare at him. "Kidding," the older man quickly amended. "I love all my children equally. Anyway, I'm going to start something for dinner."   
"I'll come with you," Noora said, pushing up off Isak's bed. "I don't want you burning the kitchen down."   
As they filed out, Isak returned to staring at the ceiling. He began to trace the cracks with his eyes, thinking of how unfair it was of Even to leave him all alone like this for an entire day, and he felt his mind going fuzzy until he drifted into sleep. 

When Even got home, Eskild, Linn and Noora were eating their pasta at the kitchen table. "Even!" Eskild exclaimed. "We missed you! Have you eaten? You can have some of this, if you'd like."   
"I'm fine, thanks," responded Even with a grin. He scanned the room. "Where's Isak?"  
"In bed. He fell asleep after studying. You should go wake him up, though, or else he won't sleep tonight," Noora responded. "Plus he wants to see you. He's been sulking around all day."   
At this, Even grinned. "I'll see what I can do," he promised, before heading to their room. 

"Halla," Even muttered as he sat down beside Isak, who looked adorable all sleepy in his jeans, with his face pressed into the pillow, curls smushed everywhere. Even began to run his fingers through the smaller boy's hair before leaning down and placing a kiss on the side of his mouth. At this, Isak began to stir. He lazily put one hand on Even's neck, making their kiss linger, before letting Even pull away and staring up at him with dusty green eyes.   
"Hi," Even said, brushing some hair out of Isak's face. "I heard you missed me?"  
At this, Isak stuck his lower lip out in a pout. "I did not. I was just mad at you for leaving me all alone here."   
Even laughed. "Not too mad, I hope," he said, making Isak pout further.   
"Mmhmm. How could you leave me? Here? Alone? With them?!"   
"I don't know, my sweet prince. I must have been brainwashed."  
"Well you better make it up to me," Isak muttered, closing his eyes again with a sleepy sigh.  
"Nuh-uh-uh, no more napping, mister," Even tutted, still playing with Isak's hair. "You need to sleep tonight for school tomorrow. And you need to eat dinner."  
He kissed Isak's forehead and then his mouth, eliciting a whine from the smaller boy when he pulled away. "Come on," he said, holding out one hand, "I'll heat something up for you." 

While Even cooked, Isak clung around his waist like they were glued to each other. Sleepy and still mildly grumpy, he let his face stay smushed against Even's back.   
"Aww, you got the little monster out of his cave!" Eskild exclaimed upon seeing this. Isak opened one eye to shoot daggers at him but Even only laughed.   
"He just can't resist me."  
At this, Isak made an offended noise, but he didn't detach himself. Even finished up dinner and they went back to their room, where Isak sat in Even's lap on the floor, Even leaning on the bed, and ate. Or maybe was fed. Just a little. Even set up something on Netflix and they watched for a while, until Noora came in.   
"Hey," she said, "Can Eva spend the night? Her mom's not around and she's upset about something with school and..."  
"Yeah, sure," said Isak immediately. Even nodded, and Noora smiled.  
"Cool. And, Isak? I'm glad you're not pouting anymore."  
"Pouting?! Me?! I never pout!" Isak defended. Noora rolled her eyes.   
"Yeah, sure. But anyway, thanks guys." She shut their door with a soft click. Even laughed at Isak's still-sour expression and then shook the younger boy off of him. "Let's get in bed," he suggested.   
They finished their movie and then spent a couple minutes laughing and talking. After a while, Isak's eyes grew heavier and heavier until he was apparently asleep on Even's chest.   
The older boy smiled down at his sweet boyfriend. "I love you," he whispered softly, and he was surprised but delighted when Isak muttered back, "I love you, too."

The next day, at school, Isak was sitting in bio next to Sana when, all of the sudden, their teacher got a phone call. He’d done well on his french test, or at least he thought so, and everything was going well. He was in a pretty good place and soon summer would be here, so generally Isak was happy. Really happy.   
And then…  
“Isak, you’re wanted in the principal's office.”  
The whole class glanced at him as Isak raised his eyebrows. After a quiet moment, he shrugged and started to gather up his things. He acted calm, but his heart was pounding. Why did the principal want to see him?  
Walking through the halls, the blond boy felt his throat closing up as he tried to stay calm. It was probably nothing, right?  
He got to the office and knocked lightly. The principal nodded through his window and Isak walked in.  
“Isak,” he said with a small, nervous smile. The teenager narrowed his eyes slightly.   
“Is everything okay?”  
“Um… no. No, it’s not.”   
At this, Isak’s stomach sank. He tried to stay calm. It had to be his mother, right? What had she done? Was she okay? Had she tried-  
“It’s your father. He’s been in an accident.”   
“What?” The word popped out of Isak’s mouth before he could stop it. His dad?   
“He… got in an accident while driving.” The principal licked his lips. “He was over the legal alcohol limit.”  
“He was drunk?” Isak asked, still not understanding. It felt like everything was moving in frames.   
“Yes. He’s… he’s in the hospital. He’s in critical condition, but he’s… still with us.”  
Isak’s glance darted around the room. He felt his pulse speed up, his heart beating far too fast. He wanted it to stop before it got to bad, he wanted to start screaming or sobbing but he couldn’t.  
“Is there somebody you want me to get?”   
What?  
Get… somebody?  
“Jonas,” Isak whispered after a moment. His pupils were dilated. He thought of Even for a second but he knew that Jonas was the one he needed.   
The principal made another call as Isak sat there in silence. He felt like he was swimming, weightless, barely above water.   
“I’m so sorry, son,” the principal said, clapping Isak’s shoulder lightly. The teen said nothing.   
After a minute, he heard the door to the receptionist’s office open and close. He turned slowly to see Jonas standing there, looking mildly confused and then his face dropped as the principal spoke to him. The man pointed to his office, and Jonas walked in looking dazed.   
And then the tears came.   
At first, Isak barely noticed them. They spilled onto his cheeks and he wiped them away with one hand, much like he had when talking to his dad about Even for the first time, eyes wide, mouth gaping open.   
“Jonas,” he whispered. And then the dark haired boy took two steps towards Isak and pulled him so tight that Isak felt like his ribs were being crushed and he was trying to breathe but he couldn’t. He remembered holding Jonas like this after he and Eva had broken up and feeling sick to his stomach about it, and then again after Jonas got in the fight with the Yakuza boys. More recently when Jonas’s sister had told him she was moving to the States with her boyfriend. Isak understood that most male friendships didn’t involve crying and hugging and admitting your deepest insecurities, he knew that most boys didn’t send red heart emojis to each other, but when you’ve known each other since you were eight years old and been there through everything, things change. When you spend every Thursday night getting kebab together, things change. And things between Isak and Jonas were too deep not to do these things. So when Isak started shaking into Jonas, the dark haired boy just held him.   
“He’s alive, Isak. It’s gonna be okay. He’s alive.”  
“Why does this keep happening?” Isak stuttered, his chest heaving. “How come every time things are good something gets fucked again?”  
He was breathing far too fast and felt his lunch coming back up. As soon as he started gagging, Jonas lunged for the trashcan and held it in front of Isak’s mouth.   
After heaving up what he had eaten that day, Isak sat down, leaning his head against the wall as his body shook and his vision swam.   
“Breathe,” Jonas instructed. “I’m gonna get the nurse, okay?”  
“No,” Isak choked out, “don’t leave.”  
“Okay,” Jonas agreed. He opened the door slightly and mouthed nurse to the principal, who was waiting anxiously.   
“What’s going on?” Isak asked after a moment shuttery breathing. “I can’t see.”  
“You’re blacking out. That happens in panic attacks. Bad ones.” Jonas had done a ton of reading on this stuff, ever since the first time Isak dragged him to the ground, shaking too hard to stand.   
“Why can’t I see?” Isak hyperventilated, hitting his palm against his head.   
“Stop,” Jonas said, grabbing both his wrists and holding them down. “Feel me. I’m right here.” He put one hand on Isak’s neck. “I’m here.”  
Isak’s breath calmed slightly but he didn’t calm down. After a couple of seconds, his eyes fluttered and his head lolled. A natural response to this extreme sort of panic. Jonas stared at the boy in front of him sadly.   
Isak was the happiest kid Jonas had ever met at age eight. Just a fluffy, blond ball of energy with the brightest smile in the world. And they were brothers, after just a year of knowing each other. They were everything to each other. And every time one of their world’s fell apart, the other was there to make it hurt less.   
Jonas knew what Isak had done to him and Eva. She had told him at a party last year, about to pass out she was so drunk. She didn’t remember it, but he tucked it away in his heart. He wasn’t mad.   
Maybe he’d known that Isak liked him. Jonas had been pretty sure Isak liked boys for a long time, so, during their first year, when he realized how Isak was looking at him, he understood why. And he… he didn’t do much about it. In fact, he… he might have encouraged it. Not hugely, but he didn’t discourage it. He showered Isak with attention, even more than usual. But then, at the same time, he flaunted Eva in front of Isak. Maybe he wanted him jealous.   
He didn’t like Isak like Isak liked him, that wasn’t it. But it felt good, to get that attention from somebody. That complete and utter adoration. So he gave it room to grow. It wasn’t really conscience. But every time he caught Isak staring like he loved Jonas more than anything, he felt a little better about himself. So he let it grow.   
And then Isak threw himself into the closet so hard and fast, and he locked the door behind him, and his eternally bright smile disappeared. His feelings for Jonas faded, his feelings in general faded; or, at least, he smothered them until they were nothing. He moved out. No parents to make sure he was okay. Nobody. And as much as Jonas tried to get back to him, Isak had changed.   
And that was why Jonas was so grateful for Even. Even brought Isak back. Back to earth, back to Jonas, back to everyone. And even if that meant hurting so much sometimes, times like now, Jonas knew it was worth it.   
So he gathered Isak up and waited for the nurse to arrive while he sent Even a text.   
Please come to the principals office. Isak needs you.


	6. Chapter six

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi loves, thank you for all the support! I absolutely love getting comments and kudos, so thanks! Also, just so you know, I don't plan on having much, if any, angst between characters. I'm not a big fan of having my soul saddened by fanfiction, so I just like to keep things good between characters, even if it is a little unrealistic haha.

Chapter 6  
“Isak,” Even mumbled upon finding the younger boy asleep in front of the TV at three in the afternoon. He cocked his head at his small, sleepy boy, who was slumped on the couch. Eskild walked out a second later. “Ja, he’s been like that for a while now. I didn’t know if I should wake him.”  
“Could you, next time? He really needs to get his sleep schedule back on track,” Even trailed with a slight frown. Eskild nodded and patted Even’s back.   
“You’re so good to him. It’s completely unfair that two little baby gays have it so good when I’ve been out and single for ages.”  
“Sorry, Eskild,” Even laughed. “Good luck finding something like this, though.”   
Eskild harrumphed and waked out of the room. Still grinning, Even walked to the couch and sat next to Isak.   
It had been about a week since the accident. Isak’s father was doing better. He was awake and talking. If they were lucky, he could go home in a few weeks.   
Isak hadn’t taken the whole thing very well. It wasn’t just the accident that terrified him, it was the drinking. Apparently his father had always been a little booze-heavy, but this was a new low. Isak hadn’t broughten it up yet, he was giving his dad some time to recover first, but it was eating away at him. Which was why Even had to be strong and keep him on track.   
“Baby,” he sing-songed now, sitting beside Isak and pulling him into his shoulder. The smaller boy sighed softly and tucked his face away in the crook of Even’s neck.  
“Come on, you gotta get up.”  
“Nei, I don’t wanna.”  
Even remembered how Isak had woken him up at two thirty this morning with desperate, scared kisses. “Please,” he’d whimpered. “I- I just need you right now.” It was no wonder he was tired. Nevertheless, he had to get up. Even resorted to a classic move of his, picking the younger boy up from under his knees and armpits. Isak glared at him. “I’m not a doll,” he tisked.   
“You’re my doll,” Even retorted, leaning in and rubbing his nose against Isak’s, who rolled his eyes with a smile. He carried Isak to the kitchen and then set him down on the counter, leaning in for a long, wet kiss. When he pulled away, Isak was outright grinning. Finally.   
“Are you okay?” asked the older boy, tucking some of Isak’s hair behind his ear.   
“I’m good.”  
“Good.” Even leaned in for one or two or five more pecks before sitting down at the kitchen table.   
“I’m thinking of going shopping in a bit, want to come?”  
“I have plans with the boys,” Isak explained. “You should come to that, though.”  
“Nah, I really need to get something.”  
Isak raised one eyebrow at Even with a confused smirk. “What’s so important?”  
“You’ll see.” 

After Isak left with the boys, Even went to Eskild, Noora and Linn. “So, this is still okay with all of you, right?”   
The three roommates nodded. “I think it’s really sweet of you to do this, Even,” Linn said with an uncharacteristic smile. Even smiled back.   
“I hope he thinks so, too.”  
“He will,” Noora assured him. 

Two or three hours later, Isak came home. His snapback was missing- “fucking Mahdi”- but he was smiling and the darkness under his eyes didn’t look as bad as it had before.   
“So,” the small boy said, “what did you buy? Was it as important as you cryptically made it out to be?”   
“Yes,” Even responded with a smile. “I think you’ll like her, too.”  
“Her? Even, did you get me a stripper?”   
“Nei,” Even laughed. “Come see.” He lead a suspicious-looking Isak to their room, and when the younger boy saw what was on their bed, his jaw dropped.   
“Is that… a kitten?”  
“Ja! Surprise!”  
The cat was tiny. Her fur was a pearly grey and she had wide, scared green eyes. She kneaded at their comforter and then shrunk away when Isak approached. He kneeled down to be eyelevel with her before turning to stare at Even.   
“Do you like her?” the older boy asked nervously.  
“Like her? She’s adorable! But, Even, what…”  
“She’s an anxiety cat. She’s been trained to sense when somebody’s in distress and respond appropriately. I was looking up ways to make you feel better, and a lot of people said having an anxiety pet worked really well. I hope you like her. Eskild and Noora and Linn said it’s fine that she’s here, but if you don’t like her than we can-”   
Isak cut him off with a kiss. “I love her,” he said after pulling away. “And I love you. Jesus Christ, I love you so much.”  
Even smiled until his eyes were slits and then leaned in and kissed Isak again. Just as things were getting heated, a tiny meow was heard from the bed. Isak pulled away without hesitation.   
“Hei!” he said, lifting the kitten by her soft belly. “You are so beautiful, little girl! What should we call her?” He turned to Even, who was trying to hold back his amusement at Isak turning into a giant marshmallow for this little kitten.   
“I was thinking we could call her Cardamom,” he admitted, and Isak beamed.   
“Cardamom,” he repeated, popping the M. He kissed her tiny head and, just then, a knock was heard from the door.   
“Ja?”  
Noora popped her head in. “Did you- oh my GOD!” she squealed upon seeing Cardamom. She ran straight to the bed, where she and Isak proceeded to ooh and ahh over everything the cat did for twenty minutes straight.   
The next day, Isak and Even visited the hospital again. They were riding the bus over and Isak was practically tripping over his own two feet walking to the stop feet in sleepiness- Even was pretty sure he hadn't gotten more than 3 or 4 hours, because of everything with his dad. So when they got on the bus, Even grabbed them two seats and pulled Isak tight into his shoulder. The younger boy nuzzled the crook of neck and easily fell asleep. Even wondered why it wasn’t this simple at night.   
Even noticed a tall, pretty girl with bright blue eyes smiling at him from a couple seats over and across. She blushed slightly when she got him looking, smiling wider and looking down. Then she looked back up and gave him a tiny, flirty wave. Does she think Isak’s my brother? Even thought.   
He waved back with an obviously incredulous smile. She bit her lower lip and let out a little nose laugh, tucking some hair behind her ear. Even looked away and planted a kiss on the crown of Isak’s head, who nuzzled further into him. When Even glanced back over, the girl was staring at her phone.   
The bus ride was long, so, after a bit, Isak woke up and looked around in confusion. “Are we almost there?” he asked, voice gravelly with sleep. Even shrugged a little and stroked Isak’s cheek with his thumb, who smiled his pretty, glowing smile and then popped up to give Even a light peck.   
When they got to the hospital, Isak was a little trembly. Even knew he was planning on talking about the drinking with his dad today, so he squeezed his hand and then looped one arm around his shoulders, kissing his temple. “It’s gonna be okay,” he assured him.   
They walked inside hand and hand, heading to Isak’s dad room. The man was still in pretty bad shape, cut up and swollen in plenty of places and on crutches, which he could hardly use. “Hi, papa,” said Isak, sitting down as he walked in. Even sat beside him, with a polite, “Hi, sir.”   
“Hey, boys. How are you?”  
“We’re good,” Isak responded. “You?”  
“Getting better.”  
The silence that filled the room was loud. “Papa, I wanted to give you time to get a little better before I asked you about this, but the principal told me you were drunk.”  
Isak’s dad frowned. He looked like he was trying to figure out how to respond.   
“That’s true,” he finally said. “But, Isak, I was barely above the limit, and it was wet out.”  
Isak furrowed his eyebrows. “The fuck?” he said without thinking. And, then, “Sorry, but, was that an excuse? Serr?”  
“No, I’m just trying to explain myself.”  
Isak rolled his eyes. “I- Jesus, you can’t even take the blame for this. When you were drunk driving, you still manage to blame something else.”  
“Isak, I-”  
“How could you do it?” Isak asked suddenly, his voice breaking. Even squeezed his knee. “How could you put yourself and so many other people in that much danger? Don’t you even want to be here for me?”  
“I do,” his dad sighed. “And this isn’t a regular thing. I just had a little too much.”   
“But how could you do it? I- I don’t understand. How could you chose to put yourself in that situation. I knew you didn’t care when you left me to watch mama, but you’re willing to put yourself in a situation where you could die? Did you even think of what might happen? What if you died?”  
“I know,” his dad whispered. “I’m so sorry, Isak. I’m sorry.”  
Isak was crying now. Even wiped one of his tears away. He couldn’t help it.   
“That’s not enough,” Isak mumbled. “You’re always sorry, but it’s never enough. You left me. Alone. At least mama cares. But I couldn’t stay in that house. At least I got her a nurse before I ran out, didn’t just leave her with a fucking fifteen year old! And now… you almost left again. But for real. And I don’t understand why I mean so little to you that you’re willing to die. Don’t you wanna be there for me, papa?”  
“I love you so much, son,” Isak’s dad said.   
“I- I gotta go,” the teenager responded. He stood quickly and Even followed him out the door without question. Once they got outside, he wrapped Isak up in the tightest hug he could manage and kissed away his tears.   
“Breathe with me,” he whispered, and they both counted to ten, in and out, in and out. Even would do anything to keep Isak from panicking right now.   
When Jonas had texted him, Even had gotten up and walked out of class. No explanation. Nothing. He left his stuff behind, too. Just ran.   
“Hey,” Jonas said, catching him outside the office. Even could see the nurse leaning over Isak, who was sleeping- fainted?- in a chair.   
“What’s happened? Is he okay?”  
“He’s gonna be fine. His dad, um, he was in an accident. Isak had a panic attack.”  
Even tried to catch his breath. Isak was okay. “Is his dad…”  
“He’s alive. He’s in the hospital. Isak asked for me after getting the news, but I thought you should be here when he wakes up.”  
Jonas’s eyes flashed when he mentioned that Isak asked for him, as if he was ready to defend Isak for calling for him over Even, but the older boy understood. In fact, he more than understood. He put one hand on Jonas’s shoulder and then pulled him into a hug. “Thank you so much for being here for him.”  
“Yeah, of course, man. He’s my brother.”  
Jonas patted Even awkwardly when they pulled apart. “And thanks to you, too, for … you know. Making him so happy. Seriously. I’ve never seen him this happy.”  
Even nodded. “He makes me feel the same way,” he admitted, and Jonas gave him a long look.   
“Please… don’t leave him. He can’t… he deserves to have somebody stay. For once.”  
Even was a little surprised. Jonas had never been so up front with him.   
“Of course. I- I love him. But, you know, you’ve stayed. He has you. Don’t sell yourself short.”  
Nodding, Jonas clapped his back. “Thanks, man.”   
They went into the office and were both there when Isak woke up. 

The bus ride home was long. They didn’t speak much, only exchanged a few kisses. Isak fell asleep halfway through and Even had to shake him awake when they got to the flat.   
“Come on, baby,” he whispered, pulling Isak up by one hand. They got into the flat and Eskild and Noora were there, ready with waffles and a million toppings.   
“Good, they boys are here, now we won’t have to eat all of this alone,” Eskild said, trying to play it cool. But Even suspected they had been waiting for them, trying to make Isak feel better. So they ate waffles and talked and laughed for a while.

Finally, the two boys got to their room. "Halla," murmured Even as he and Isak fell back into bed. Isak immediately crawled so that he was lying almost directly on top of Even, hiding his face in the crook of the older boy's neck. "Are you okay?"   
"Ja, just tired. Today was a lot.”   
"I know," Even sighed. He planted a gentle kiss on the crown of Isak's head, who titled up his chin to ask for more. Even smiled and kissed his mouth slowly and sensually, gently parting his lips with his tongue. Isak sighed into Even's mouth and pulled himself up a little further by Even's shoulders. After a minute they broke apart and Isak rested his chin on Isak's chest. The older boy stared at him for a few seconds before breaking into a huge grin and tossing Isak onto his back.   
Isak let out a yelp of surprise that quickly turned into half-amused protests as Even peppered him in tiny kisses. After a while, he made his way to Isak's face and kissed his nose and forehead.   
"I think you missed my mouth," Isak said sarcastically, and he was responded to with a full-force kiss that left him breathless and smiling. He whimpered quietly when Even pulled away, but the older boy only laughed and kissed his nose again. "I love when you're needy," he admitted.  
"I'm not needy!" Isak all but shouted in exasperation, making Even laugh harder.   
"Sure you're not, baby," he said. And then, with an evil grin, he grabbed at Isak's crotch. "You don't need me at all."   
Isak let out a whine when Even lightly palmed the growing pressure in his pants. "Evennn," he groaned, shutting his eyes. Even smiled and started slowly sucking on Isak's neck.

After they were finished, the two boys lay smiling in their afterglow. Just then, a small meow was heard as Cardamom jumped up onto their mattress. "Hei, sweetie!" Isak exclaimed, grabbing her and cuddling her against his chest. She purred, vibrating between them, and both Isak and Even felt like they were completely and truly at home.


	7. Chapter seven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SMUT!! Don't read if your not into it. Also I'm literally a lesbian so sorry if something's inaccurate with the way they have sex, I don't know anything about dick lol.

Chapter 7  
Isak was in bed when Even walked in. He was laying, scrolling through his phone with a small frown, head propped against the pillow.  
"Halla," Even whispered as he sat down beside Isak, who sort of grunted in response.  
"Is that all the greeting I get?" joked the older boy, smiling at Isak, who rolled his eyes and tossed his phone aside, looking toward Even with a small smile.  
"What?" Asked Even, slightly confused. Isak smiled a little wider.   
"Nobody's home," he said.   
Even's eyebrows shot up. "Really?"   
"Ja. Eskild is out with some guy. Noora is with the girls, and Linn is with her parents. Even Cardamom is in Linn's room because they were cuddling before."  
"So it's just us?" Even asked, leaning over Isak slightly.  
"Just us," the smaller boy repeated. He bit down on his smile and lifted his chin towards Even, who met him half way. Isak wrapped his arms around Even's neck as they wrestled tongues, and Even held him up by the small of his back, propping himself up on his elbow.  
"I wanted you all day, Even," Isak breathed as the older boy started to suck on his jaw.   
"Yeah, baby? What were you doing?"   
"Mm, touching myself for you. Thinking about your cock," Isak sighed, and Even felt a primal instinct take over in him as he pulled Isak's shirt over his head. "You're so dirty. I need to punish you now baby, yeah?"  
"Yes please," Isak whined as he pushed down his pants. Even looked at his pretty boy all naked and needy for him and smiled.  
"You need me, baby?" He asked. Isak whimpered and pushed his hips up towards Even. "Say it."  
"I need you."  
"Why?"  
"B-because... I have no control for you."  
"None?"  
"No, Even, I... I can't control myself around you. I'm yours."  
Even smirked. "I know, baby. Good boy."   
He started to kiss down Isak's smooth chest. His boy was so fucking hot. Even took off his own shirt and pants before getting to Isak's hard dick and kissing the tip lightly. Isak squirmed as Even took him in his mouth. The older boy started to blow him slowly, progressively getting harder and faster as Isak started to whimper and whine more.   
"Faster, please," he begged. "Need you."  
Isak gasped and mewled when Even pulled away. "I'm just getting the lube, baby. Get yourself ready for me."   
Isak immediately did as he was told. He got into his favorite position, so, when Even came back, he was on his hands and knees, ass in the air. Even smiled and laid a gentle kiss on the small Isak's back before applying some lube to his fingers and slowly easing one in. "You're so fucking tight, baby, so good for me," he sighed as Isak groaned into the pillow. He added another finger, jamming in and out of Isak fast now, hitting his prostate. Isak was trembling. "Please, Even," he begged, "inside me- n-now."  
"Okay, baby," Even replied. He got positioned and gently eased himself into Isak, who let out a strangled moan. "You've been so bad for me," Even tisked, beginning to go harder and faster. "Such a naughty boy."   
He brought his hand down on Isak's ass and the younger boy yelped in pleasure. "M-more" he begged.   
"Yeah, baby? You like when I punish you like this?"   
"Y-yes, Even, yes," Isak all but sobbed. God that boy is so sensitive, thought Even. He leaned down to suck on Isak's pretty shoulder blades, which were jutting out, slamming in and out of Isak. He suddenly pulled out, eliciting a hiss from Isak, but simply flipped them and kept going, now sucking mark after mark on Isak's neck. "You're so pretty, baby," he whispered, and Isak glowed, tears spilling onto his cheeks from the intensity of it all.  
"C-choke me," he begged, and Even agreed, putting one hand around Isak's neck and adding pressure. He made sure not to hurt his baby, but he knew Isak loved this.   
"Even, g-gonna-" he choked.  
"Come for me, baby."  
And Isak did. He came with a choked sob and a series of shutters, and Even followed fast.   
"Was that good?" Even whispered as he cleaned Isak up. The smaller boy nodded.  
"Thank you," he said quietly, nuzzling into Even, who kissed top of his head. They both fell asleep after a while.  
KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK!  
Isak sat up in bed like there was a fire but, once he realized it was only somebody knocking at the door, he threw on a pair of sweatpants with a couple grumbles- though not too loud to wake Even- and walked out of their room.  
"Who is it?" He asked through the door.   
"Noora," the voice on the other side responded. "I forgot my keys."  
"One sec," Isak mumbled as he opened it for her. What he didn't expect to see was Noora along with Eva, Sana, Vilde and Chris.   
"Oh, halla. What are you all doing here?"  
"Pregame," Noora explained. Isak briefly wondered what time it was before he noticed that they were all smirking at him.  
"What?"  
"Isak... have you looked in a mirror lately?"   
"Um, nei? Is there something on my face?" He asked. He knew he looked ruffled from sleeping but...  
Oh. Oh shit. As soon as Isak looked down at his chest he exploded into a blush. There were purple and red hickies and bruises... everywhere.   
All the girls were laughing by this point. Isak smacked one hand to his forehead, muttering, "Holy fuck, I'm such an idiot."  
"Who's at the door, Is?" a gravelly voice asked from the hallway. Even emerged wearing much more clothes that Isak, which conjured another round of cheers from the girls.   
"Halla," Even greeted them, a little confused. Then he got a good look at Isak and let out a full faced laugh. Isak turned to look at him and they all started freaking out about his shoulders. "His shoulders?!" Vilde shrieked. "Look at his neck! Was Even strangling him?"   
"Shut up!" Isak protested. "This is your fault," he said to Even.   
"If I remember correctly, I wasn't the one begging for it," Even retorted, and by this point Isak was pretty sure his god damn toes were blushing.   
The girls were all but screaming by now, Chris going on and on about some ouija board as Eva talked about how totally unfair it was that they found each other and she didn't have anyone. Sana was smirking so hard you'd think her dimples would pop. Isak tried to shove Even away when he swooped in for a kiss but the older boy was stronger and somehow Isak was kissing him back. 

After the girls left again, most of them thoroughly drunk, Isak got Cardamom from Linn's room and locked himself in his room with her, leaving Even on the other side. "Come on," the older boy laughed, "open up."  
"Nei, we're mad at you," said Isak, holding his precious angel to his chest.   
"What if I make those cookies you really like and the three of us watch Romeo and Juliet?" Even tempted.   
It's not hard to understand why he was back in the room faster that you could say, "Baz Luhrmann."

The next day was Saturday, which meant it was time for the date they had been planning for a while now. It was Even's turn to decide what to do. He wanted to make it special, since Isak had been feeling so low. He woke up at nine and was happy to see Isak still sleeping and went to prepare breakfast. Eskild was in the kitchen.   
"Even, my love! How are you?"   
"Good," Even replied with a smile.   
"What are your plans for today?"   
Even rose his eyebrows at Eskild with a telling smile.  
"Ooh, special day with your man?" Eskild guessed.  
"Correct," said Even as he poured himself a bowl of cereal.   
Eskild patted his back. “You better treat him right!”  
“I will,” Even promised. He ate his cereal quickly because he wanted to get started on his day with Isak. First thing’s first, he had to wake Isak up.   
When he walked into their room, Isak was curled up, knees drawn to his chest and face smushed against Even’s pillow. He was wearing nothing but his boxers. Even smirked.   
“Hei,” he whispered, even though Isak couldn’t hear him, before crawling onto the bed and positioning himself over Isak. He started to suck on his neck, running his thumb through his curls as he cupped the boy’s head. Isak shifted slightly and let out a soft, sleepy sigh. Even started to get more aggressive, sucking long and hard on Isak’s jaw and then making his way to the smaller boy’s lips. He eased his tongue into Isak’s mouth and smiled as his boyfriend kissed back.   
“Even” Isak whispered, blinking at him lazily as the older boy pulled away and began to kiss down his chest.   
“Do you want this, baby?” Even asked. Isak nodded with a sleepy lust in his eyes.   
"Jesus, Isak," he muttered, lightly tracing the boy’s hard cock with his fingers after removing his boxers. Isak gasped at the contact as Even added, “You’re so beautiful. And so powerless.”  
"It's not my fault you're so f-fucking hot like this," he weakly defended. Even quickly took Isak into his mouth all the way, fucking him with his lips. "Mm," Isak moaned, suddenly bucking his hips. "Sorry," he whispered, curling his fingers through Even's hair. Even smiled as much as he could and lifted Isak by the ass, bringing him deeper into his mouth.   
“Faster,” Isak whined, body shaking. Even slipped one finger up his ass, forcing a loud groan out of the younger boy. Isak was shuddering and teary-eyed and it didn't take long for him to come into Even's mouth, and he swallowed without a second thought and then chastely kissed Isak on the lips.  
“Good morning,” he whispered quietly. Isak was flushed and wrecked, thoroughly gorgeous in Even’s eyes.   
“Morning,” he mumbled back, shutting his eyes with a smile and hiding his face in Even’s neck. The older boy had layed back down and pulled and blanket over Isak, who was still naked. He peppered his face in kisses as Isak breathed in and out quietly. “What are we gonna do today?” Isak sighed after a minute.   
“Well, let’s see. After we shower, I’m gonna take you to a super surprise location and we’re gonna have a great time.”  
“How detailed,” Isak responded sarcastically.   
“Ja, I know. Anyway, we should probably get up. I want to get there by noon.”  
Isak groaned and buried his face in Even’s shoulder.   
“Come on, baby, we gotta have our special day,” Even laughed, kissing Isak’s forehead and then gently getting out of bed. He took the younger boy’s arm and tugged at him.   
“Let’s go. We can shower together,” Even promised. Isak let out a long huff and then threw the covers off himself dramatically, pulling on a pair of sweats for the short walk to the bathroom.   
Once they’re there, Even got the hot water running and pulled Isak’s pants off. He looked the younger boy in the eyes and whispered, “I love you so, so much. You know that, yeah, baby?”  
“Of course,” Isak responded, eyebrows drawn. “I love you, too.”  
Even smiled and slowly brought his nose to Isak’s before kissing his cheek. “Come on,” he said after a moment, “let’s get in.”   
The two boys stepped into the shower, and Isak let Even spend the entire time running his hands through his soft hair, placing gentle kisses along his neck and back, whispering in his ear. “My beautiful,” he sighed. Isak felt like he might cry.   
They got out of the shower after a while and then got dressed. Noora was in the kitchen when they walked out, looking pale, tired and hungover. She hummed in their general direction as a greeting.   
“Somebody had a good night,” Even observed. Noora raised her eyebrows.  
“I could say the same to you,” she responded. “And I good morning, from what I heard an hour ago.”  
Isak buried his face in his hands- why did he live with roommates?- but Even just laughed and hooked one arm around Isak’s shoulder. “Speaking of love,” he said, and Isak peaked between his fingers, “when is William visiting?”  
“Next weekend,” Noora replied with a small smile.   
“Good,” Isak said. “It’s about time you two straightened things out.”  
Noora nodded. Suddenly, Eva came stumbling out of Eskild and Noora’s room.   
“What time… oh, hi,” she said upon noticing the two boys. They both gave her small waves, and she suddenly giggled. “Are you feeling better, Isak?”  
“What?”  
“I mean, after last night, you must have been pretty wrecked.”  
Isak rolled his eyes and dragged Even away. 

“Where are we going,” Isak whined for the millionth time as they passed another bus stop. There was practically nobody on the bus, so Isak was leaned against the wall, legs over Even’s lap.   
“You’ll see,” Even promised. 

“Oh, Even, it’s… wow.”  
The two had gotten off in some remote little town, and even still it took them another thirty minutes to get to their destination. But, boy, was it worth it.   
They were standing in front of a huge lake. The sun glittered down on it peacefully and there were trees on all sides.   
“I thought we could make out underwater legally for once,” Even joked, bumping Isak with his shoulder, and the smaller boy turned and grabbed Even’s neck, bringing their mouths together.   
“I love it,” he whispered after pulling away.   
“Good, because I love you,” Even responded. “I thought we could eat lunch here, I packed a picnic. And your trunks.”  
Isak grinned.   
They spent the day eating, with Even lazily feeding Isak every so often, and splashing around until their fingers got numb before swimming back to shore and drying off in the sun. Once they were on the bus back home, Isak was so happy that he couldn’t help but be a little PDA, remaining tight against Even the whole ride and occasionally kissing him.   
They got back around five, and only Linn and Eskild were home.   
“Hei,” Eskild said when they walked in. “Good day?”  
Isak smiled. “Perfect.”


	8. Chapter eight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Smut again, sorry if it's not good! There's not as much as last chapter.

Chapter 8  
Isak woke up to an empty bed that Sunday. He sighed, just like he always did when Even got up before him. He just loved waking up curled against his boyfriend so much.  
But breakfast was nice, too. So Isak got out of bed and dragged his feet to the kitchen. Even wasn’t there.  
Isak looked around for a long moment, as if he had never in his life come out to an empty kitchen. “Calm down,” he heard from behind him, “he just went for coffee.”  
Isak turned to see Linn getting something out of the fridge, wrapped up in a blanket. “You’re up early,” he commented.  
“You are, too,” she responded. “Where’s Cardamom?”  
“In our bed.”  
“Can I steal her?”  
“Ja, sure.”  
“Thanks.”  
Linn padded back towards Isak’s room, and the teenage boy followed her. He grabbed his phone off his nightstand. Hei, ran to get coffee. Be back in 10xx  
Isak frowned slightly and turned his phone off, tossing it onto the bed. He kind of wished he hadn’t let Linn take Cardamom, he could use some cuddles just about now. But, instead, all he got was a cold bed and a missing boyfriend.  
When Even got back, Isak glared at him. “Halla,” the older boy said, putting their coffee down. “How are you?”  
“Well, I woke up to a sad, empty bed, and then you weren’t even in the kitchen,” Isak sighed dramatically. Even laughed, his smile taking over his whole face.  
“I’m sorry, baby,” he said fondly. He was wearing a beanie over his perfect hair which for some reason made Isak grumpier. Even walked to their bed and sat down next to his boy, gently pushing some hair out of his face.  
“Are you really mad?” he asked quietly. Isak melted.  
“Nei,” he responded, “just grouchy. You know what would make that better?”  
Even could take a good guess. He leaned down rubbed his nose against Isak’s, smiling, and then licked his lips before kissing the smaller boy.  
“Good morning,” Isak whispered when they pulled apart. Even grinned.  
“Good morning.”

That afternoon, Even was out again. This time he actually had to meet somebody to work on a project for school, so Isak wasn’t as much of a crab about it. In fact, Isak was sitting with Cardamom in his lap, working on bio homework, when there was a knock at the door.  
“Sorry, sweetie,” Isak said to the kitten with a kiss to her head as he moved her off of him.  
He jogged lightly to the door, being the only one home, and opened it swiftly. It was probably Eskild forgetting his keys again.  
But Isak certainly didn’t expect to see his dad on the other side.  
“Oh… halla. Um, what… what are you doing here?” Isak stuttered after a long, silent minute. His father smiled.  
“Isak. I… while I was in the hospital, something in my insurance wasn’t processed right and I… well, basically, I’ve been evicted from my apartment. I’m going to stay with mama, but her nurse said she needs time to prepare, so I was wondering if I could stay here. Just for tonight.”  
Isak stared at his father for for too long before saying, “Um, well, I’ve got to check with my roomies, but I’m sure… um, yeah, I think it’ll be fine.”  
“Okay, thank you,” Isak’s dad responded.  
He stood awkwardly on their doorstep until Isak hurriedly stepped aside and said, “Oh, come in! Do you want anything to drink, or…?”  
“I’m fine, thank you,” his dad replied. Isak was texting the kollektivet. “Where can I put my bags?”  
“My room is down the hall,” Isak responded. His dad disappeared into the hallway.  
“It smells nice in here,” he said from Isak’s room after a moment. “Like lavender.”  
Isak rolled his eyes.  
Isak: Hey guys, my dad is out of the hospital and he needs a place to stay for one night… chill if he crashes here?  
Even: Of course.  
Noora: That’s fine, Isak. But you will be held accountable for his food:)  
Eskild: Ja, sure.  
Linn: As long as he isn’t loud.  
“Yeah,” Isak called into his room, “It’s fine with everyone. You can stay here tonight.”  
“Thank you,” his dad said, coming back to the kitchen. “And, Isak, I know last time we talked things got heated, but…”  
“Don’t worry about it,” Isak cut him off. There was quiet. 

After a while, Eskild, Noora and Linn returned. Eskild spent a while in the living room with Isak’s dad, talking about one thing or another. Isak sensed that Eskild was being cautious but also protective, as if ready at any moment to jump to Isak’s defense. He certainly had no good view of Isak’s parents.  
And, as for his dad, he seemed sad. When Eskild seemed to know everything about Isak and Isak was more comfortable around Eskild than he’d ever been around his dad, he visibly wilted. But it was no right of his to know what was going on with Isak.  
Not anymore.  
Around five, Even came back. He kissed Isak’s cheek at the door and brushed some of his soft curls away from his face. “Are you okay?” he whispered.  
“Fine,” Isak replied. 

Eskild, Even, Isak and Isak’s father ate dinner together. It wasn’t terribly uncomfortable, but the tension in the room was palpable. “So,” Isak’s dad said after a particularly long silence, “where should I be sleeping?”  
“Couch,” replied Isak immediately. 

“Shouldn’t Even be getting home? It is a Sunday,” asked Isak’s dad after dinner, when Even and Eskild were doing the dishes. He and Isak were in Isak’s room and he spoke with a hushed voice.  
“What?” asked Isak.  
“I just mean, don’t his parents want him home on a school night?” his dad asked again.  
And then it hit Isak like a truck; he’d never actually told his dad they lived together.  
“Oh, um…” Isak trailed. “Pappa, Even lives here.”  
“What?”  
“He… yeah. We live together. This is our room.”  
Isak’s father was looking at him with eyebrows raised. “Isak, you’re barely eighteen,” he said. Isak felt a flare of defensiveness come over him.  
“Ja, so?” he asked. “I was living by myself when I was sixteen.”  
“Okay, but don’t you think this is a little soon?”  
“Nei,” Isak whispered.  
“How long have you been living together?”  
“For almost… six months.”  
Isak’s dad stood in a stunned silence. “Okay,” he eventually said. “I guess I don’t really get to make rules for you anymore, do I?”  
“No,” Isak agreed. “You don’t.”

That night, Isak’s dad went out to the couch. Eskild was already in bed, as were Noora and Linn, and Isak was in the shower, so Even brought him some blankets and a pillow.  
“Here,” he said, handing them to the man. “I hope you’re comfortable.”  
“Yes, thank you,” he responded. “So,” he continued, “you live here?”  
“Oh,” Even replied, eyebrows shooting up, “yeah. You didn’t know?”  
“No,” his dad said, “Isak neglected to mention it.”  
Even glanced around. He wasn’t sure what he should say. “Well, he doesn’t… he doesn’t tell you much,” he finally concluded.  
“That’s true,” said his father. “Is he happy with you?”  
Even smiled slightly. “I think he is. I know I certainly am with him.”  
“Good.”

Even got back to their room just as Isak was coming out of the shower. The smaller blond walked with a towel around his waist, face red.  
“Halla, baby,” Even said. He walked to Isak and wrapped his arms around his waist, placing a gentle kiss on his cheek.  
Isak immediately turned and put his arms around Even’s neck, pressing their mouths against each other. He pushed his tongue into Even’s mouth and needily ran his hands through his hair.  
“Hey,” Even whispered, pulling away, “calm down. Your dad is right out there.”  
“Please?” Isak whispered. “I-I need you so bad right now. I feel like- I feel like I can’t breathe around him, and I just- I just need to be close to you.”  
“But your dad,” Even replied with a small frown. “He’d hear us.”  
“I’ll be quiet, I promise,” Isak whined. He started sucking on Even’s jaw, pressing their bodies together. Even bit down on his lower lip.  
“Isak,” he sighed, bringing their mouths together again. “You gotta be quiet, okay?”  
“I will,” his boy promised, eyes big and pleading. 

Isak found it a little harder than he’d anticipated to be quiet. He’d never really tried to be completely quiet before. Sure he’d tried to keep it down, if his roommates were home, but trying to keep absolutely silent was not easy. “Shit, baby, quiet! Quiet!” Even reminded him for the fifth time as he slammed into Isak, who had just let out a particularly audible moan.  
Isak was tearing up- he always got this way when he was particularly emotional. Even continued to ram in and out of him.  
When he hit Isak’s sweet spot hard, Isak stuttered and gasped out, “E-Even!”  
“Shhh,” Even scolded. Suddenly, he clamped one hand over Isak’s mouth, whose eyes grew even wider. Even’s nails were digging into his skin, creating little half-moons along his cheek. This was… new.  
“I’m sorry, baby, but you gotta be quiet.”  
Isak moaned into his palm, visibly turned on by the hand Even was keeping over him. Isak loved to be dominated, but they had never tried this before.  
He was arching his back in the air, eyes dark and misty and almost entirely black. Even continued to slam into him, so hard that Isak’s legs were going numb.  
“So good for me,” Even praised, trailing kisses on his jaw. Isak was still making noise against his hand, but it was much quieter now.  
A couple more minutes passed of Even fucking Isak hard, until suddenly the younger boy tensed up and and let out a choked scream into Even’s hand. He came onto his stomach and the taller boy’s chest and Even followed suit after another couple hits.  
He quickly peeled his hand away from Isak’s mouth, who took deep breaths, face red and eyes watering.  
“Shh, shh,” Even whispered as he pulled out and got a wet towel to clean them off with. Isak was still staring at him with wet lashes and flushed cheeks. “Are you okay, baby?” Even asked as he lied back down. Isak nodded. He seemed incapable of speaking and only curled into Even, burying his face in the place where his neck met his shoulder. Even threw one arm over him and kissed the top of his head again and again, tucking the comforter around them both. Eventually, the younger boy’s breathing evened out. Even sighed. Isak felt so small.


	9. Chapter nine

Chapter 9  
The next morning, Isak woke up with Even for school at six thirty. They, along with Noora, were all in the bathroom brushing their teeth and chatting about all the quizzes and tests they had coming up. Suddenly, Noora’s phone buzzed. She looked at it and then the color left her cheeks.  
“What?” Isak asked, watching her with concern on his face.  
“It’s… William. He’s in town. Now. Today. And he’s coming to school.”  
Isak raised his eyebrows. “Why? Wasn’t he supposed to come next weekend?”  
“Apparently Chris is in town and… he’s leaving on Friday, so William wanted to be able to see him.”  
“Oh.” Isak furrowed his eyebrows. “Are you okay?”  
“I mean…” Noora was silent for a beat. “I was expecting another week.”  
“I’m sure it’ll be fine,” Isak assured her, hesitantly putting one hand on her shoulder. “Even if you don’t get back together, you’re… you don’t need him.”  
Noora gave the smallest smile. 

Isak walked out fully dressed around seven fifteen. His dad was sitting up on the couch, scrolling through his phone.  
“Isak,” he said. The teenager stopped and looked at him.  
“So,” his father continued, “you… well… this is a bit awkward, but you’re being safe, right?”  
“Hmm?” Isak hummed, a look of confusion on his face.  
“You know, with Even.”  
“Safe with Even?”  
“Isak, don’t you think I have ears?”  
And then the boy caught onto what was happening and his entire face broke into a flush so red he thought he might as well have that stupid neon face paint on again. “I-” he choked. “We’re being safe.”  
“Okay. It’s just really important, even if it’s with… a boy.”  
“Yep,” Isak squeaked.  
There was a quiet moment before his dad sighed. “So it’s real, huh?”  
“What is?” Isak asked, still recovering from what just happened.  
“You… you’re… gay.”  
At this, Isak snapped around to look at his dad again. Did he really just ask…?  
“It’s that I didn’t believe you,” his dad clarifies. “I just… I figured I’d be supportive, and, if it was a phase, then great. But you guys are living together, and clearly you’re being intimate. I guess it’s not just a phase.”  
Isak was staring at him with disgust. “Papa,” he said after a moment, “it’s not a phase. I’m gonna go to school now. And when I get back, I want you to be gone.”  
Isak turned to go, but his father stood and grabbed his wrist. “Isak,” he said. “I… I never meant to hurt you.”  
The teen couldn’t tell if he meant by insinuating he’d hoped he wasn’t gay or for just everything. He frowned. “Well, you did.”

Later, just before lunch, Isak had just about the biggest smile on his face that Even had ever seen. Okay, not completely true. He might have seen a bigger smile every time he complimented or kissed or cuddled the younger boy, but, still, this smile is too damn big for some annoying looking kid Isak was talking too.  
He recognized him from the Kosegroup Christmas party. He’d been hanging around Eva all night.  
And behind him was another tall, attractive boy. This one had got swoopy brown hair and looked like he could kill you in a heartbeat, whereas the other had a brown quiff and an arrogant smile.  
"Who are they?" Even whispered to Magnus.  
"Oh, that's Chris and William. They were third years last year."  
"William?" Even asked. "Noora's William?"  
"Yeah," Magnus replied.  
"How does Isak know them?"  
"They were friendly, I guess."  
Even watched as Isak cracked up for a fourth time and narrowed his eyes.  
"I'm gonna go introduce myself," he said, walking away from Magnus and toward the trio.  
"Hi," he said when he reached the boys. He looked at Isak expectantly, whose smile faltered just the tiniest bit.  
"Oh, guys, um... this is Even. Even, this is Chris and William."  
Chris raised his eyebrows at Even with a mildly suggestive smirk. William, who was still standing behind them in quiet, stuck out his hand with a low, "It's nice to meet you."  
He and Even shook, and William gave him a nod.  
"So," said Chris, "you two are a couple, right?"  
Isak blushed, which mildly annoyed Even. "Yes," the older boy said after a moment. "We are."  
"Cool," said Chris, still smirking at Isak, who had taken a step away from Even. William watched all this go on in observatory silence.  
"Come on," he said after a minute. "Let's go find Elias."  
Chris said nothing but trotted away after the taller boy, leaving Isak and Even alone.  
"So..." Even trailed.  
"Do you want to grab lunch? I'll get us seats," Isak cut him off, turning on his heel and walking away.

When Even came back with two sandwiches and a couple bottles of water, he was more than a little annoyed to see Isak had seated himself between Magnus and Mahdi. Okay, maybe they sat down after he did, Even thought. But they all now Isak and Even always sat next to each other. They wouldn’t take up both his sides.  
So Even sat across from him and stared at Isak, who avoided his eye. “Thanks,” he said simply when Even handed him his lunch. 

After school that day, Even met Isak in their usual spot. “Halla,” he said, staring at the younger boy, who wouldn’t look up from his phone, with narrowed eyes.  
“Hi,” Isak responded, dropping his phone in his pocket. Even cocked his head at him.  
“What?”  
“We’re not gonna talk about you being embarrassed to be seen with me in front of those guys today?”  
Isak brought his chin back. “What? Even, I wasn’t embarrassed.”  
“‘This is Even’? No ‘Even, my boyfriend’?”  
“They know who you are, they’ve seen my instagram.”  
“Oh, so when Chris asked if we were a couple and you blushed so hard you couldn’t even respond, that wasn’t embarrassment? And then avoiding me all day?”  
“You’re being crazy,” Isak shot, and then froze. He looked at Even, whose mouth was hanging slightly open. “Nei,” the younger boy said, “nei, nei, nei.” He took Even’s face in his hands. “That’s not what I meant, baby. I never should have said that. I’m so sorry.”  
Even stared into Isak’s eyes. He wasn’t that hurt; he knew Isak didn’t mean it. He was just shocked.  
“Isak… are you embarrassed of me because I’m bipolar?”  
“Nei!” Isak barked, shaking his head harshly. “Even, I love you. And I would never be ashamed of you. I couldn’t. I am so sorry I said you were acting crazy, but I didn’t- I did not mean because you’re bipolar. I was just… upset. But I’m so sorry.”  
“So why are you upset, Isak? Why were you embarrassed?”  
Isak glanced at the ground. “Today, my dad… he basically said he’d been hoping me being gay was just a phase, but seeing us living together made him realize it was real.”  
“And he was… disappointed about that?” Even asked carefully, brushing some of Isak’s curls back.  
“Yeah,” the smaller boy whispered. “And then, I just thought… I started to get scared. Like maybe William and Chris would suddenly realize it was real, too, and then I’d be the kid everyone called fag again.”  
“Isak,” Even sighed, tilting his chin up to look his boy in the eye. “Your dad is an asshole. If he can’t accept who you are than there is something seriously wrong with him. But your friends? Chris and William and everyone else? They’re happy for you. I promise. And if anyone isn’t, then that is on them. Because you are the most beautiful boy I’ve ever met. So if they chose not accept you, that’s their loss.”  
Isak let out a soft sigh and nodded, and then Even pulled him into a tight embrace. “I’m sorry,” Isak mumbled into his neck, and Even felt wetness on his eyelashes.  
“I know,” Even replied. He kissed Isak’s head. “I love you.”  
“I love you, too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, this chapter was a little personal for me because after I came out to my parents (I had just broken up with a boy and I was explaining why) my dad basically told me the next morning that I shouldn't "make stuff like that up," because if it got around, "people might think I was actually... gay or something." And that lead to another year in the closet because I just couldn't tell him I hadn't made it up. Isak's issues with his father hit close to home, so please be kind in the comments and remember, everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Nobody's opinion should mean more to you than your own. Life is now and alt er love<3


	10. Chapter ten

"Even?" Isak shouted, picking the pill bottle up off their nightstand. It was exactly where he'd left it yesterday, Wednesday.  
"Ja?"  
"Did you take your meds today?"  
Even popped his head into the room. He looked at Isak with the bottle in his hand. "I forgot."  
Isak let out the quietest sigh. Forgetting his pills was a sure sign of an oncoming episode. Even could sometimes sense them; the up up up of a rollercoaster before the plummet; but it was Isak who could best read the signs.  
"Well you should take them now," he said quietly. And then he smiled, flashing back to the memory of a bathroom and a pixie-headed girl that felt like it'd taken place a million years ago.  
Isak smiled and shook one of the little tablets into his hand. "I'll help," he said.  
Even watched on curiously as Isak placed the pill onto his tongue. When he realized what was happening, he lit up in a grin.  
Even took two short strides to Isak and smashed their mouths together. He took the pill into his mouth with his tongue and swallowed, holding Isak by the back of his neck and smiling when he drew a little needy sound out of the younger boy. He took all his pills like that that night and then sucked a few marks on Isak's neck for good measure. "You're so fucking hot!" Even laughed after pulling away, and Isak smiled.  
Maybe an episode wasn't coming. What right did Isak have to anticipate it? After all, only Even could feel what Even felt. 

"Do you like it?" Even asked hopefully, a few days later. He'd spent his Sunday wrist deep in color. His brain was racing, always one step ahead of him, tripping over itself to reach the Next Great Idea. Now, the older boy was standing in front of their bed, staring at Isak. Along their headboard, he'd painted a recreation of Starry Night.  
Isak looked at it for a long time. "Even," he said after a moment, "it's beautiful. But... can you explain to me why you did it?"  
"Because of you!" Even replied with a face-splitting smile. "I wanted to make something beautiful for my beautiful boy. Our kids will all have painted headboards like this. Because they'll all be beautiful, too." He tilted his head towards Isak, still grinning.  
"Hey," Isak said, taking his hands, "remember our game? Minute by minute. No future talk."  
Even's mood seemed to dampen slightly. He nodded.  
Later, Isak found a dozen half-finished paintings on the inside of their closet doors. 

"Can I get you something to eat? Please?" Isak whispered, body pressed to Even's protectively. The other boy had his eyes shut. His lashes fluttered but he didn't say anything. Monday seemed like eons ago, he'd been riding out the high and then, around eight pm, fallen into the low. And the low was far too deep to see any light. 

Even felt like he was rotting. His body was so heavy, just a painful useless weight that he was cursed to drag around. He couldn't respond to Isak when the boy pleaded with him to eat. He couldn't get up when Eskild came and sat by him and offered to get him anything he needed. He couldn't pick up the phone when his mother called for the sixth time. He heard Isak talking to her in the living room the next day- "He hasn't moved. I've gotten him to eat some crackers, but that's it. I just... I wish there was more I could do,"- and he felt his heart ache just that much more. Worry. Pain. That was all he gave anyone; all he could ever give anyone. And so when his mom came and sat beside him, he didn't say anything to her, either. Just go, he thought. Let me dissolve into nothing. 

"You should go," he whispered for the millionth time, after he'd regained enough strength at least to speak. "I'll never make you as happy as you could be with somebody who's not... broken."  
Isak laid on his back and stared at the ceiling.  
"Even," he sighed, taking the older boy's hand from under the comforter. "Remember when you told me nobody could think what you think?"  
Even nodded. Isak stole a long look at him before continuing, "Well, I need you to respect that you can't feel what I feel either. So when I tell you that you make me happier than anyone else ever could or ever has, I need you to try to believe me."  
Even stared at him for a long time. "I wouldn't lie to you, Even," Isak whispered. "Please believe me."  
And, after what felt like an eternity, Even nodded. "Okay."

He only missed three days of school. Isak practically begged him to go that time. "If you break the 10% limit you'll have to repeat again, baby. Please just try to go. You don't need to speak or do any work. Just show up. And if you need me just text me. I can miss as much class as I want. Just text me and I will be there."  
Even didn't speak or do any work. He moved through his classes in complete silence, not lifting a finger to complete any worksheet that was passed out to him. He ate lunch with Isak in an empty classroom. Well, ate is an overstatement. It was more like Isak fed him a few torn off pieces of bread.

The weekend came the next day. By Monday, Even was feeling okay enough to function again. Okay enough to drag himself out of bed at six thirty and make toast, which he munched on slowly. Okay enough not to absolutely fail his math test. On Wednesday, when he sat down with the boys for lunch again for the first time, he felt a little embarrassed, as always. He felt like he was crawling back. I'm over my fit now, guys. I'm gonna be normal again, I promise.  
But of course they didn't see it that way. Magnus wrapped him in the biggest hug, whispering, "I missed you so much!" in his ear. Mahdi smiled so wide you'd think his first child was just born and said, "Bro, you're back! Thank god, man! We need you around."  
And Jonas gave him a nod. "I'm really glad you're feeling better," he said with a seriousness that made Even understand that he meant it.  
Isak was happier, too. Of course, he always was after Even got out of an episode. He smiled wider, laughed louder, as if he had just remembered why life was so great. There was a relief in his eyes that made Even sad. Relief meant there had been pain. 

"I love you so much," Even whispered into the crook of Isak's neck as he pounded in and out of him. It was Saturday and they'd just gotten back from some party, both of them buzzed but not drunk in thanks to their three-beer pact, and Isak was stammering Even's name into his ear as he clawed up his back. "I love you too," he choked out, and Even felt the last heaviness that's weighed him down for almost two weeks now lift and he could almost breathe easily again. 

Cardamom purred against him. He was sketching Isak, who sat on the couch and worked studiously on his English homework. "Stop staring at me," the small boy murmured with a smirk.  
"Can't help it," Even replied as he shaded Isak's nose. That boy had such a pretty nose.  
"Let me see what you're drawing," Isak demanded, putting his books aside. He hovered over Even's sketch pad, a smile pulling up his cheeks.  
"I call it "the boy who keeps me from drowning,"" Even whispered seriously. Isak brought his chin up and stared him in the eyes before gently nuzzling their noses together. They kissed softly.  
"Even though I can't hold my breath under water?" the smaller boy whispered back. Even laughed and nodded.  
"Even though you can't hold your breath under water."


	11. Chapter eleven

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Based on a request for sick Isak!

Chapter 11  
Isak was curled up on their bed, trying desperately not to wake Even. It was two in the morning and he couldn't sleep, but not for all the usual reasons. It was just that he was sweaty and trembly and felt mildly sick to his stomach. Or more than mildly. He was shivering but also way too hot. And all he could think about was not waking up the beautiful boy next to him.   
Suddenly, Isak felt his stomach lurch. He tried his hardest to quietly slip out of bed and padded to the bathroom, at first walking light and quick and then sprinting. He got to the toilet and sank to his knees, releasing everything he'd eaten in the last day. His whole body hurt as he retched again and again, eventually gagging on bile as his stomach tried to expel something that wasn't there anymore. He clung to the toilet seat, sweat dripping into yesterday's lunch as he shook over it. Just then he felt a hand on his back.   
"Isak?" Noora asked. She had a worried, tired look in her eye.   
"I'm fine," he stuttered, "go back to bed."   
"I'm gonna get Even," Noora said decidedly, turning away.   
"No!" Isak pleaded after. Noora sighed.   
"Isak, think of how upset you'd be if Even was sick and didn't come to you."  
Isak sat in silence. He was too lightheaded to argue. 

"Even," Noora whispered, shaking the boy's shoulder lightly. "Even, come on."  
Even stirred and blinked his eyes open to look up at her. "Noora?" he asked. And then he realized he was alone in bed and sat up. "Where's Isak?!" There was an edge of panic in his voice.   
"He's okay," Noora replied. "He's in the bathroom. He's sick."   
Even jumped out of bed. He was only in boxers but he didn't care, and he walked quickly to the bathroom. Isak was huddled by the toilet, a visible sheen of sweat on his body and shivering violently. "Even," he groaned when he saw him. "I told her not to wake you."  
"Shh, baby, it's okay," Even sighed. He thanked Noora as she ran to get the thermometer. Isak was clammy. His forehead was scalding.  
"Here," the blonde girl said when she got back.   
"Put this under your tongue, Is," Even instructed. Isak let his mouth fall open and then kept the thermometer in place until it beeped, eyes fluttering.  
"Shit," Even muttered as he read the tiny screen. "Shit, baby. You're really sick."  
"What's his temperature?" asked Noora. Isak stared at them almost incomprehensibly.   
"104," Even responded.   
Noora's eyes blew wide. "I'm gonna get Eskild."   
Suddenly Isak lurched towards the toilet again. There was still nothing to come up so he just gagged into the bowl, spitting out stomach acid. Even rubbed his back and placed small kisses between his shoulders.  
"Hey, kiddo," Isak heard from the doorway. He relaxed at Eskild's voice and turned to the man with flushed cheeks and scared eyes. Eskild walked to him and felt his forehead. He sighed. "You said it was 104?" he asked Even, who nodded.  
"I don't wanna go to the doctor," Isak whined, starting to cry. Even shushed him and smoothed back his very damp curls.  
"You gotta, baby, you're really sick."  
"Even's right, Isak," Eskild said, kneeling to face him. He squeezed his practically god son's knee and smiled at him. "We're gonna take to you to the emergency room, and then you'll be okay. They'll fix you right up."  
Isak was staring at him with unfocused eyes.   
Just then, Linn came out of her room. "What's going on? Why are you all talking?" she asked, squeezing her eyes shut in reaction to the light.   
Noora, who was sitting on the sink counter by now, frowned. "Isak's sick. Eskild's gonna take him to the ER."  
Linn looked at Isak with slightly wider eyes. "Is he okay?" she asked with concern.   
"Hopefully," responded Eskild, standing. "Even, get him dressed warm and then take him out to my car. I'll get my keys and my insurance information and everything."  
Even nodded and put his arm under Isak's shoulders. When the younger boy didn't respond to that, however, he lifted him from under his knees and carried him that way to their room.  
"Even," Isak whimpered, resting his face against Even's chest. The older boy squeezed him close. 

Eskild and Even sat in the waiting room. By the time they'd arrived at the hospital, Isak's fever had climbed to 105, and so he was whisked away quickly.  
"Isak Valtersen company?" somebody said, walking out of the room he'd been carted into with a clipboard in hand. Eskild and Even stood, walking to the doctor.  
"So," the man said, leading them into Isak's room. "He has viral pneumonia. Have you noticed any coughing the last few days, or shortness of breath?"  
"Yeah," Even immediately responded. "He's been coughing a lot."   
"Okay. Well, we gave him some antibiotics. His fever was pretty high, so we'd like to keep him here for tonight."  
"He threw up," Eskild cut in. "Is that normal?"  
"His body was probably trying to get rid of the germs in any way possible. He'll be fine in a few days, though I suggest he doesn't go back to class for at least a week. Do you two live with him?"  
The boys nodded.   
"Okay. Just make sure he eats lots of liquids, stays warm, and takes his medicine."  
"I'm his boyfriend," Even cut in. "We sleep in the same bed. Will I get sick?"  
"Did you have pneumonia when you were younger?"  
"Yes."  
"Then you'll probably be okay. Just no kissing or sharing bodily fluids in anyway, obviously."  
Even nodded.   
"Would you like to see him?" asked the doctor. Even and Eskild were up before he finished the sentence.

"Ev?" Isak whispered, looking up at the older boy in confusion.   
"Halla, baby. I'm right here," Even replied, stroking Isak's forehead. He looked worse that before, red eyes and pasty skin and dark circles.   
"They gave me shots," Isak mumbled, shutting his eyes again. "I hate shots."   
"I know, sweetheart, but it's okay. You're getting better now."  
Eskild was there, too, hovering over the younger boy with a sad smile. "Hei, bud," he said when Isak noticed him. "How're you feeling?"  
"Eskild? What are you doing here?"  
"Who do you think drove, silly?" Eskild replied fondly. "I had to make sure you were okay."  
Isak was staring up at the two boys above him. "I'm sorry I made you both come here," he said, voice cracking. He felt his heart begin to pound as he curled his toes into the mattress. "When I was little I used to get sick all the time. Mama said it was punishment," he muttered, tears spilling onto his cheeks.   
"Don't talk like that, baby," Even sighed, wiping the tears away. "We want to be here. We love you."  
Eskild nodded and took Isak's hand.   
"I'm still sorry," Isak sighed, eyes still wet as he drifted to sleep. "Maybe if I wasn't such a fuck up we wouldn't be here." His breathing evened out on the last word as he fell under all the medicine. Even and Eskild stared down at him and then at each other.   
"I wish he never had to hurt again," Even whispered.   
"I know," Eskild agreed. If there was one overarching thing the two had in common, it was the need to protect Isak. 

The next morning, Sunday, Isak woke up to a smiling Even in a room full of flowers. "Halla," he said, and his throat hurt so bad he winced.  
"Hei!" Even replied, kissing his cheek gently. Isak stared around him at all the blooms.   
"Where did these come from?"  
"I got them. I wanted you to wake up to something nice after your rough night. Eskild, Linn and Noora helped some, too."   
Isak looked around. "Thank you," he sighed. Even, who had been sitting on the edge of his bed, slid in beside him. "Where's my phone?" the smaller boy asked.   
"Here," Even replied, reaching over Isak to get it off the table. Isak thanked him and turned it on. There were several messages.   
"Hei, Even texted you were sick. Feel better!" from Eva.  
"Isak!! I'm so so sorry you're feeling so bad:(((( please call me if there's anything you need!! Love always<3" from Vilde.   
"She misses her daddies," from Linn, with a picture of Cardamom attached.   
"Text when you wake up, my love:) there's soup and tea at home" from Eskild.  
"Hey Isak, I hope you're not too sick:( we've made up your bed extra comfy and I cleaned up some so you'll be nice and safe when you get back" from Noora.  
"Hi, please text me when you see this. Are you okay?" from Jonas.  
"Bro, what happened? Don't die, man, we need you" from Mahdi.   
"Isak!! You better not die on us:)" from Magnus, and then ":(*"   
"I will get all the bio homework to you asap;) have fun! And feel better." from Sana. Isak sighed and tossed his phone down.  
"Did you tell the whole world what happened?" he asked Even, who chuckled.  
"Just the important people."   
Isak smiled and curled into him. 

After everyone was responded to and Isak was back home the next day, he could finally relax. Sure he still felt god awful, but it was better than that hospital room. Eskild was bringing him warm things to drink every hour and taking his temperature every few. “I’m not going to spontaneously combust,” Isak mumbled through his fifth time holding the thermometer in his mouth. Eskild rolled his eyes and turned to leave, but Isak sat up a little. “Wait,” he said, “can you… sit with me?”   
Eskild smiled and walked over without any sarcastic comment. He’d only seen Isak this sick once before and, just like now, the young boy had barely been able to keep up his grumpy-teen act. Now Eskild sat beside him and gently pushed back some of his sweaty curls. “Are you feeling okay?”  
“I feel like balls,” Isak muttered, burying his face in the pillow. “I wish Even was home.”  
“He’ll be back soon,” Eskild promised. “Isak,” he added after a hesitant moment, “last night… you said that your mother used to yell at you when you got sick. Say it was punishment for all your mistakes.” Isak blushed, eyebrows drawn.   
“I don’t remember that.”  
“Well, you did say it. Is there… is there anything you wanna talk about?”  
Isak frowned. “I… well, she did used to say that stuff. Whenever I got sick, she said it was because I’d done something to displease God. But, like, I dunno. I don’t… believe that or anything.”  
Eskild waited a beat before resting his hand on Isak’s shoulder. “You know it’s not wrong that you and Even are together, right?”  
“I know,” Isak replied immediately. Then he paused. “I was just hopped up on meds or something.”  
“But if you do ever think… or feel like she might have been right… well, she wasn’t, okay? She wasn’t.”  
Isak sighed. “I know. Thanks.”  
Eskild smirked and then kissed his fingers and pressed them to Isak’s forehead. “I’ll be back with more tea in a while,” he replied.   
Isak nodded and felt himself drifting off. He’d been falling in and out of sleep all day, sweating through the blanket but still violently cold. 

When Even got home, Isak was still asleep. He was drooling onto the pillow and Even smiled, walking towards the bed and kicking off his shoes. Sitting down of the edge of the bed, he wiped away some of the spit. It was gross, sure, but Even didn’t care.   
“Halla, baby,” he said when Isak’s eyes fluttered open. Isak groaned and pushed himself further into the pillows.   
“I threw up again,” he whispered. “Before you got home.”  
“I’m sorry, baby.”  
Isak frowned. “I hate being sick.”   
Even crawled into bed beside him, trying to make him warm. “I know, sweetie.”  
Isak pressed his face into Even’s chest. “I don’t want you to get sick,” he mumbled, although one wouldn’t guess that based on their current position.   
“The doctor said I won’t,” Even promised. He kissed Isak’s forehead. “As long as we don’t exchange bodily fluids.”  
“Don’t worry, Isak yawned, “I won’t piss in your mouth or anything.”  
At that, Even let out a laugh that jostled Isak from his apparently very comfortable position, earning a glare from the smaller boy. “Sorry,” Even chuckled. 

The next day, Magnus, Mahdi and Jonas were all at his front door. “Hey man,” Magnus greeted in English as they all filed in.   
“What are you doing here?” Isak asked, sitting up for what felt like the first time in days.   
“You’re not in school for two days and you think we’re not coming to visit?” Mahdi replied.   
“Yeah, man, what do you take us for?” added Jonas. Isak grinned.   
“I don’t wanna get you guys sick, though,” he said after a moment. They all rolled their eyes.   
“If you think we’re coming anywhere near you, bro, you’re crazy,” Mahdi said. True to their word, all three boys sat across the room from him.   
“You’ve missed a ton of stuff,” Magnus said, eyes growing wide. “Like, a ton. So, first of all, Chris and Kasper were caught hooking up in the doctor’s office. And then Leif, the third year, was caught cheating.”  
Isak nodded. He was interested, really, it was just that his head was pounding and he felt mildly like he might throw up sometime soon. Even should be home soon, and that’s all Isak could think about.   
Speaking of, the older boy appeared in the doorway at that moment. “Halla,” he said, looking around at all the boys there.   
“Hey, bro!” Magnus exclaimed. “There you are. We were all looking for you after school and we texted you. We wanted to give sick little Issy a visit.”  
Isak rolled his eyes and the stupid nickname that they made fun of him with and then held out his arms to Even, who smiled and walked over. Sitting on the bed, he let Isak practically crawl into his lap, leaning against his chest as the older boy opened his legs and leg him sit between them. Magnus booed and Mahdi rolled his eyes, earning a huff from Isak.  
“I’m sick,” he said pointedly.   
At that, Jonas let out a laugh. “Oh, please, man, like you wouldn’t be sitting like that if you weren’t sick.”  
Mahdi, Magnus and Even all let out laughs and cheers to that sick burn, and Isak shot daggers at Jonas, who only grinned and cheekily raised his eyebrows. 

Vilde popped by on Thursday. By then, Isak was up and walking. He opened the door for his with a confused look on his face. “Vilde?” he asked.   
“Hei!” the blonde exclaimed cheerily. “I know you’ve been sick for a while, so I brought over some cookies I made!”  
Isak smiled at her, warmth breaking over his face. “Come in,” he said, stepping aside.   
“Is Noora here?” she asked, following him into their kitchen. “I texted her that I was coming over, but she didn’t respond.”  
“She’s out grocery shopping with Eskild and Even,” Isak replied. He was sore and tired but he didn’t want to go back to bed. Instead, he sat down at the kitchen table and gestured for her to do the same.   
“Here,” Vilde said, passing him the tray of cookies. Isak took them and peeled off the foil, taking one out and biting into it.   
“They’re really good,” he commented. Vilde scrunched her nose and gave him the biggest smile, biting her tongue between her teeth  
“Thank you!” she bubbled.   
“Do you want one?” Isak asked.   
Vilde’s smile faltered and she shook her head. Isak didn’t ask again.   
“When are you coming back to school, Isak?” she asked after a moment.   
“Next Monday.”  
“Okay. We miss you, you know,” she said fondly. She reached across the table and squeezed his hand. “Eva, especially. She loves being friends with you again. And Sana misses you in biology. And I miss you. At kosegroup.” She gave him a grin.   
“I miss you too, Vilde,” Isak chuckled.   
“It’s good you have Even here to take care of you,” she commented.   
“I know,” Isak replied with a smile.   
“Isak…” Vilde trailed, eyes flitting around nervously. “When… when did you and Even first love each other? I mean, when did you know? And… when did you say it?”  
Isak blinked. “Oh. Well, Even said it first. He texted it to me after… well, after his first episode. He thought he was saying goodbye. I said it for real on New Years. We were sitting next to each other watching it snow and I just said it. And he said it back. But I think… I think I knew the first time I felt like I was gonna lose him. Does that make sense?”  
Vilde nodded solemnly. “I think… I think I’m in love with somebody.”   
Isak smiled. “Vilde, that’s awesome!” he said happily. She looked happy, but then uncertainty washed over her face.   
“But… I don’t think they feel the same way.”  
“What? Why? Who is it?”   
Vilde’s lips quirked up. “They’re just… well…”  
“Hey, you don’t have to tell me if you don’t want,” Isak cut in as she sat there uncomfortably.  
Vilde nodded. “Okay. It’s just… it’s just that… well, I don’t think…” she looked around. “Isak, I don’t mean to make you feel uneasy, but… I don’t think anybody could really love me, you know? I know it sounds silly, but I’m scared to say it because I’m scared… I’m scared they’ll laugh.”  
Isak frowned. “Vilde,” he sighed. “They won’t laugh. I know… I know what it feels like to be… unsure of yourself. But you’re a great girl. I promise that if you tell them you love them, they won’t laugh, unless they’re a complete douche. And an idiot. Okay?”  
Vilde thought for a long time. Eventually, she furrowed her brow and let a small smile take over her face. “Okay. Thanks, Isak.”  
The blond boy smiled at her and winked. 

Finally, by Saturday, Isak felt almost completely okay. He still wasn’t well enough to go out, however, so he just stayed home with Even.   
“I missed this so much,” the older boy said while lazily making out with Isak, smoothing back some of his hair. He gently slipped his tongue between Isak’s lips and then moved towards his jaw, leaving soft kisses along his cheek and neck. “I missed feeling you.”  
Isak hummed with a smile, shutting his eyes. He brought his knees up to his chest with a smile, running his hands over Even’s back as the taller boy hovered over him, sucking marks on his pale skin.   
“You’re so beautiful,” Even whispered into his collarbone.   
“I love you,” Isak sighed as he pulled Even back to his mouth, wrapping his arms around the older boy’s neck.   
“I love you, too,” Even whispered back. Isak practically purred into his mouth as he brought his legs around Even’s waist.   
“I missed you,” he said lovingly.   
“I missed you, too. But I’m right here, baby. I’m here.”


	12. Chapter twelve

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, another important topic to me, eating disorders! This chapter is ridiculously long but I don't think male EDs get as much attention as they should so I did my best!

Chapter 12  
Isak liked being small. He liked feeling fragile around Even. He wouldn't admit it- tough, grumpy, manly Isak Valtersen wants to feel protected? Never. But, when he was curled up beside Even, he liked the feeling of being the cute, pretty little spoon.   
And he was pretty sure Even liked it, too. He knew Even loves to play the tall, protective boyfriend. And that was more than fine with Isak.   
It's just... Even liked everything about Isak, things Isak would change about himself in a second. Like his stupid fucking bird-beak upper lip and his gappy teeth and unruly hair and little freckles. Even loved it all and Isak hated it all, but the small thing? That's one thing they could agree on. One thing that they both enjoyed about him. And, more than that, it was something Isak had some control over.   
He didn't want to fuck it up. 

That's how it started. An itch in the back of his head reminding him that he had self control and that Even liked him little and that he did, too. And then the itch became a tick, something that took over inside him every time somebody offered him seconds or candies were being passed around. "No, thanks. I'm full. I'm good."   
When Even offered him an Oreo and Isak turned it down, the older boy grinned. "What," he asked, "watching your figure?"   
Isak only smiled and rolled his eyes, but, when Even was tracing his ribs and calling him beautiful that night, he knew it'd been worth it. 

"Isak?" Vilde asked. She plopped down across from him at the lunch table. He'd been absentmindedly toying with his pizza, waiting for the other boys to show up.  
"Oh, hi, Vilde. What's up?"   
"I was wondering if you wanted to, well, to help me make food for the next kosegroup meeting?"   
"Me?"   
"Ja. Well, you and Even. I know he likes to cook."  
"Oh," Isak said shortly. He was fiddling with his thumbs. Cooking with Even sounded nice, but he didn't want to be the little taste-tester. There wasn't anything wrong with the idea, he just didn't want Even seeing him with that little willpower. "Maybe, Vilde. I'll have to ask him."  
"Okay, cool!" Vilde replied happily. "Takk!"  
Isak nodded at her. He bit into his pizza and then put it down. 

"Cook? For kosegroup?"  
"Ja, just like baking cake and stuff."  
"Do you want to?"   
Even was looking at him with the most sincere little smile.   
"I'll do whatever you want," Isak responded.  
"Okay. I think it'd be fun."   
"Okay."   
They were sitting up in their bed, Isak leaning on Even's chest, hands curled together as they watched Stranger Things for the nineteenth time. "Hey," Even whispered, "are you okay?"  
"Me?" Isak asked, twisting around a little to look at him. "I'm fine, why do you ask?"   
"I don't know. You've seemed really tired and distant lately. And like... you're embarrassed to be naked around me. Which we both know is not something you should be shy about," he said softly into Isak's neck. The younger boy blushed red.   
"I'm fine," he whispered, settling back against Even. Of course he wasn't really fine, he'd gained two pounds since last time he'd checked and Even couldn't see him all big and sloppy like that. But why would he explain something that silly? It was just another insecurity.   
"Okay. But I miss you, you know? I miss you really being here."  
Even sounded so sad it ripped Isak's chest apart. He ran one thumb over his hipbone, felt the way it jutted out. "I'm sorry," he sighed. Just wait until I get small and pretty again, he added privately. Even didn't know what to say. Isak seemed like he didn't want to talk about whatever was bothering him, but... something felt wrong. 

"Have you lost weight?"   
Magnus sat down with a clatter and a question. Isak was startled out of his sleepy trance. "What?" he asked.   
"You look lean, dude."   
"Nei, I haven't lost weight!" Isak snapped irritably. He leaned into Even's side with a pout, but his heart was leaping out of his chest. Magnus put his hands up.  
"Okay, okay, sorry. Sheesh. Anyway, did you guys see the dance girls this morning?"

"You have lost weight."   
Even said it with certainty. Isak furrowed his eyebrows. Cardamom kneaded at the comforter.  
"What? Nei, I haven't. Why would you say that?"  
"Isak, I know your body. And it hasn't always been this... frail."  
Isak flushed. "What do I care what I look like?" he said angrily.  
"How much do you weigh?"  
"Like I know."  
"Isak."  
The younger boy rolled his eyes. "I have no fucking idea, Even! I don't weigh myself. Do we even have a scale around here?" 140 pounds last Wednesday, he thought.   
"Yeah, right in the bathroom. Eskild bought it when he was trying to get in shape."  
"Ja, so? I don't use it."  
"Then let's use it now."  
Isak's pulse skyrocketed. "What? Even, nei, I don't think we should- I mean, why would we?"  
"To see? I don't know, it'll be fun."  
Isak had no defense. His throat stayed dry no matter how many times he swallowed. As Even lead him to the bathroom, he was silent.   
"Okay, I'll go first," the taller boy said. He stepped on the scale quite easily and watched as the numbers rose. "190 pounds," he read after a moment. Isak's breath hitched. "Your turn."   
Isak felt himself beginning to panic. He quelled it down, pushed it deep inside of him. "Even, this is stupid," he barked, turning away. "Everyone knows you're bigger and stronger than me, you don't have to prove it like a jackass."   
Isak felt like crying. There was a tense silence and he knew Even had a shocked, hurt, confused and mostly remorseful look on his face.   
"Baby," the older boy breathed. "I wasn't... I didn't mean to..."  
"Ja, well, whatever," Isak cut him off. "This is stupid," he repeated. "Let's just go to bed."   
He stalked out of the bathroom and he wasn't the little spoon that night. Instead Isak laid curled on the edge of the bed, tears stinging his eyes. He didn't sleep much, either.   
The next morning, he woke up alone. He found Even in the living room, drinking coffee and watching TV.   
Isak sat down a couple inches away from him.   
"Good morning," Even said. Isak kept his eyes on the screen.   
"I'm sorry," he whispered. He heard Even let out a strained sigh.   
"Me too."  
When Isak leaned into him, nuzzling his face against Even's chest, completely safe from everything, he couldn't help but think this. This is why. 

"Isak!" Sana snapped. He jerked his head up off the desk. She was glaring at him.   
"What, sorry," he mumbled.  
"Are you okay?" Sana asked with a shake of her head.   
"Yeah, fine," Isak replied. Sana pursed her lips at him.   
"Here," she said after a moment, reaching into her bag and pulling out a granola bar. "You need something to wake you up."   
Isak stared at the little snack before muttering, "Not hungry..."

"You don't want a kebab?" Jonas asked incredulously. He and Isak were at their usual spot.   
"Nei, I ate a big lunch."   
Jonas stared at him. Isak raised his eyebrows with a "what?!" look.   
"Whatever, man. You've just never turned down kebab before," the dark haired boy said. He looked into the distance. "You and Even are okay, right?"  
"What? Of course. I'm not, like, starving myself because I'm fighting with my boyfriend. I'm just not hungry," Isak said sharply. He breezed through the sentence, barely paused on "starving myself," but, still, he could taste the words.   
What irony. 

"Guys," Magnus whispered when they were all sitting at Isak's for a predrink. "Annette... she's anorexic or some shit."   
"Woah, dude," Mahdi cut in. "You can't just tell us her business like that!"  
"But I don't know what to do!" Magnus exclaimed, burying his head in his hands. "She's like, fucking gorgeous! Why would she do stupid shit like that, like what the fuck?"  
Jonas shook his head. "If you say shit like that to her, she definitely won't feel better."  
"But what should I say?" the blond asked. "She's gonna, like, die! How do I make her feel pretty enough to stop or whatever?"  
"Come on, man, this is totally inappropriate," Mahdi argued. "Annette told you that in confidentiality. I'm all for helping you out with your girl, and I think it's fucked up that girls feel like they have to do shit like that, but we can't just sit here talking about her!"   
"But she's gonna die! I don't know who else to talk to!"   
Isak stood up suddenly, his chair tipping back. "I'm gonna go take a piss," he whispered. The boys looked at him strangely as he walked away.

"Isak."  
Noora was sitting at the kitchen table. The boy, who'd walked out for a glass of water, faced her startledly.   
"I made fishcakes," Noora continued. "Do you want some?"  
Isak was gap mouthed. "Um, nei," he said after a moment. "Just ate."  
Noora raised her eyebrows. "Did Eskild ever tell you about the time I completely flipped on him for eating my fishcakes?"  
Isak shook his head.   
"Ja, so I had this very strict eating schedule, and I was already stressed. I basically called him a freeloader and an asshole. All over some food." Noora told the story without humor in her voice. Still, Isak gave an uncomfortable smile.   
"I was really mad because he messed up my schedule. I have a very difficult relationship with food, you know, Isak."  
Isak raised his eyebrows in confusion and unease. He shook his head.   
"Well, I do. I used to eat very little, back in grade nine. I actually ended up in the hospital because of it."  
Noora stared at him. Isak was almost shaking.   
"That sucks," he breathed. She nodded.   
"Have a fishcake, Isak," she said.   
He walked to her and took one nervously, as if she might bite.   
On his way back to his room, he dumped it into Eskild's trash bin.   
"What took you so long?" Even asked when Isak returned.   
The younger boy sighed and walked to him, kissing all his breath away. His questions went with it. 

"Eat this."   
Even was holding out a pastry. His eyes were hard.   
"What?" Isak asked in confused fear. They were walking home, they'd been chatting lightly. Why this? Why now?  
"Eat it, Isak." Even's mouth got tighter. "Now!" he commanded with uncharacteristic anger.   
Isak blinked. "The fuck?" he asked after a moment. "I don't want your fucking donut, Even."   
The older boy's eyes suddenly filled with tears. Isak let out a stuttered little gasp.   
"Please," Even begged, "please, baby. Just take it. Please."   
Isak was staring at him in complete disbelief. This couldn't be happening. Suddenly Even pulled him tight to himself by the back of his head, fist curling through his soft curls. "Oh god, Isak, please," he whispered. Isak could feel his tears on his neck. "Jesus fucking Christ, I can feel every bone in your body."   
"I thought you liked it," Isak whispered.  
Even pulled back. "What?"  
"I thought you liked me being... smaller than you."   
Even blinked rapidly, breathing growing shallow. "This is because of me?"   
Isak stared at him. "I... I thought you liked it."   
Even brought his hands to his face, wiping away tears. He looked horrified. "Isak, what the fuck?! Of course I like you being small, you're my small little bean, but I don't like that you're fucking dying! I'd love you no matter how you looked, all that matters is that you're healthy! But your fucking killing yourself, baby!"   
Isak let out a stuttered breath. "I just... I just wanted to look pretty for you."   
Even was holding him again, rocking him back and forth in his arms. "Fuck, Isak. Fuck, you're so beautiful. But not like this, baby, this is sick! You're dying. And I can't- I can't lose you, okay? I can't." He peppered kisses on Isak's jaw and face, holding him like he might disappear at any second. Isak's breathing was shallow as he stared straight ahead. 

"Let me see you," Even told him. They were home, now, and he wanted Isak to take off his clothes. It had been a long time since he'd seen Isak with the lights on.   
And so the younger boy slowly stripped away his layers, peeling off everyone as if it was a chore (it was.) He let himself shrink smaller and smaller until Even was crying again and he was sitting naked on their bed, body trembling like a leaf, no fat in his frame to serve as insolation.   
"Fuck, baby," Even said, wiping at his cheeks. "Fuck, Isak, fuck."   
Isak started to cry, too. "I'm sorry," he whimpered. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt anyone."   
"Shh, baby, no. No. You don't have to be sorry."   
Isak trembled as Even wrapped him up, held him close. "I wish you knew how beautiful you are," he breathed as Isak his his face in his neck. "You're so beautiful. But you gotta eat, okay? Please, Isak. Please."  
"Okay," Isak whispered. And he let Even hold him as they fell back into bed, because what else could he do? 

When he woke up, he was shocked to see it was eight in the morning. He'd laid down with Even at four yesterday afternoon. But, in his defense, he hadn't slept well in a long, long time. Even was still asleep, body wrapped protectively around Isak as he breathed in and out quietly.   
Isak felt himself starting to tremble. Yesterday, he'd agreed to eat. It had seemed so easy at the time but in today's morning light it seemed impossible. He wanted to be healthy and he wanted Even to be happy but God he didn't want to be big and chubby and ugly.   
"Good morning," he heard Even grumble softly. The older boy shifted down to kiss the crown of his head. Isak's breathing was short. "You were out for ages."  
"When did you fall asleep."  
"I don't know, around eleven."   
"I can't believe I slept for sixteen hours," Isak mumbled.  
"Well, you were overdue. When was the last time you slept for more than four or five?" There was silence. "Exactly."  
Isak sighed. He shut his eyes against Even’s chest.   
“Can we go eat breakfast?” asked the older boy, his voice scared.   
Feeling his pulse speed up, Isak instinctively curled his nails into Even’s bicep. He wanted to say no- he wanted to run the fuck away from all this.   
“Please?”  
“O-okay.”

Even got them cereal. He poured Isak a bowl and handed it to him with fear in his eyes. “Do you… do you want to watch something?”  
“Sure.”   
They sat on the couch, Isak leaned on Even as he slowly lifted the spoon to his mouth, one bite at a time, and he knew it was all going to his goddamn stomach and turning him into a bloated mess and Jesus Christ he couldn’t breathe he just had to-  
“I love you so much,” Even said quietly, pressing a kiss to Isak’s cheek. The smaller boy caught his breath in a painful gulp. He was okay. He could… he could do this. 

“Isak!” Noora said, running to catch up to him. He’d been headed to English when suddenly she was wrapping him in a hug.   
“Oh-um- hey, Noora,” he said with confusion, stumbling the slightest bit backwards.   
“Here,” she replied, pulling away and pushing an apple into his hands. “You looked hungry.”  
He stared at the shiny red fruit. “Wh- um. Thanks.”  
Noora stared into his face before frowning the slightest bit. “I’m- I’m sorry if I scared you before. With the fishcake thing.”  
“Oh, uh, you didn’t. It was- it was no big deal.”  
Noora looked away uncomfortably. “I just- I don’t want you to get hurt.”  
There was a quiet moment. And then Isak hugged her again. “I know.”

“She’s going to go to a clinic,” Magnus announced, plopping on Isak’s couch for another round of FIFA.   
“That’s good,” approved Jonas.   
“Yeah. Apparently she’s been there before, she’s been in and out of the… habit for a long time.” The blond was focused on the screen, eyes glued to the little players. “I’m just really happy she’s gonna get help.”  
“Yeah, man,” Mahdi clapped his back. “That’s great.”  
Isak smiled at them, heart thudding. He took another chip. 

“Here,” said Jonas, handing him the kebab. They were sitting on the bench, both of them in light tshirts thanks to the warm, late-May weather. Isak thanked him.   
“I was thinking about when we used to go to the skatepark as kids the other day,” the dark haired boy continued.   
“Yeah? About how I used to destroy you?”  
Jonas let out an indignant laugh. “Oh, please, you could barely stay balanced going in a straight line!”  
Isak rolled his eyes. “I was just letting you feel good about yourself.”   
Raising his eyebrows, Jonas looked to the sky. “When was the last time you skated?”  
“I dunno,” Isak admitted. “Like you said, I was shit at it.”   
Jonas nodded. “That’s true. Still, though, that was, like, our place.”  
“Ja. It was,” Isak agreed. “We could always hit it up, you know. Our Thursdays don’t have to be here.”  
“We should do that.”  
“We should.”

“Okay, so the answer would be B,” Sana said. Isak nodded, circling the letter.   
“‘In meiosis, the cell is split into…” he began reading the next question. Sana suddenly reached into her bag and pulled out a ziplock of pretzels.   
“I just remember I had these,” she said, opening the baggie. “Want one?”  
Isak stared at her. “Okay,” he said after a long moment.

“Come on,” Even said, tugging Isak behind him. “We’re gonna be late.”  
They were headed to Even’s parents’ for dinner, like they usually did at least once a month.   
“Ja, I’m hurrying,” Isak said, trotting behind him.   
When they arrived, the Bech Næsheims were just finishing setting down the food. Everything looked delicious. Isak felt his stomach turn.   
“Isak, honey, would you like seconds?” Mrs. Bech Næsheim asked later. Isak smiled at her, but his mind was moving a million miles per second, thinking how they were probably noticing how much he’d already eaten, testing him, who wants a fatass for a son-in-law?  
“No, thank you,” he said politely. He caught Even’s worried eye and blushed. 

“I’m sorry,” Isak mumbled as Even unlocked the door to the kollektivet.   
“Why?” asked Even, turning to face him.   
“I… I don’t know. I know you’re worried because I didn’t have seconds.”  
“Isak,” Even sighed, kissing him, “you don’t have to have seconds. Just… make sure you’re saying no because you’re not hungry, not because… well…”  
“It’s just really hard sometimes,” Isak whispered. Even let out another sigh and held him tight. 

“Have you been working out, dude?” Mahdi asked from across the table. Isak looked at him in surprise.   
“Me? No?”  
Mahdi shrugged. “I don’t know, you look different. Good. You look healthy, man,” he said, biting into his waffle. Isak flushed and mumbled a thank you. Even squeezed his hand. 

“You’re so beautiful,” Even whispered, trailing soft kisses down Isak’s stomach. The younger boy squirmed, pushing on his shoulders, trying to get him to move faster. Chuckling, Even shook his head. “Be patient, baby.”  
Isak whined and flopped his head back on the pillow. “I need you now,” he said.  
“I know. We’ll get there.”   
Accepting this, Isak let himself lay still. He let out a shuddery moan as Even- quiet suddenly- took all of him in his mouth. He could feel the older boy’s smile as he groaned out his name.  
“Faster,” Isak begged, thrusting his hips towards Even. The older boy obliged, moving faster, harder, swirling his tongue around Isak’s length.   
Isak shut his eyes and focused on the feeling. When Even pulled away and grabbed the lube, muttering, “My beautiful boy,” Isak, in that moment, believed him. 

“Hi, Isak!” a bubbly voice said from behind him. The blond boy turned to see Vilde’s cheery smile.   
“Hei, Vilde,” he replied, grabbing his books from his locker. She stuck her tongue between her lips momentarily, as if debating saying anything. Then, “So, the kose group is having a May the seventeenth gathering. I know you host a lot, but I was wondering… well, if it wouldn’t be too much trouble…”  
“Ja, Vilde, I can host. Don’t worry about it,” Isak said, shutting the locker. The girl brightened visibly.   
“Really? Great! Thank you! And tell your roomies thank you, too!”

Sitting at the kitchen table, Isak was fiddling with a sandwich. “Halla,” Even said as he walked in, kissing the side of the smaller boy’s head.   
“Halla,” Isak responded, biting his sandwich. “It’s okay that we have a kosegroup thing here on Saturday?”  
“Hmm? Yeah, sure. That’s fine.”  
Isak smiled, watching Even get himself something to eat out of their cabinet. “You’re so hot,” he said abruptly, making Even look over his shoulder with a suggestive eyebrow raise before laughing.   
“You too, babe,” he responded, blowing Isak a kiss. The younger boy pretended to catch it. He took another bite of his lunch.


	13. Chapter thirteen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Idek... just... fluff.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OKAY SO 20:20 HAS PASSED, STILL NO TRAILER, I'M NOT CRYING! NO! BIG! DEAL!!!  
> If you're as devastated as I am, I hope this softens the blow.

Chapter 13  
Even was curled up around Isak, one arm tight over the smaller boy's waist, peppering kisses along the back of his neck as the young blond giggled and squirmed.  
"So you do like it?" he asked again, letting ticklish little breathes into Isak's ear.   
"Nei," Isak laughed. Even had ,just moments ago, walked in on him singing the words to "5 Fine Frønker," under his breath. He’d been out of the room getting them a snack since they’d just gotten back from school. The smaller boy had looked up, made eye contact with Even, and immediately burst into protest. Even, smiling like an idiot, had dragged him to the couch with kisses and chuckles, insisting that yes, it is a great song, you love it.   
"Yes," he repeated now, "you adore it. It's our song."   
"I adore you," Isak responded seriously, a grin creeping over his face as Even huffed and buried his face in the crook of his boyfriend's neck.   
"So corny," Even groaned, as if physically hurt by the comment.  
"Huh?! Says the guy who broke into a pool just to recreate a fucking Romeo and Juliet scene?!"  
"You loved it," Even argued, pressing slow kisses on Isak's jaw, across his cheek. They rubbed noses, eyelashes almost touching.   
“I love you.”   
Even rolled his eyes. "I love you, too," he said, finally kissing Isak properly. The smaller boy smiled against Even's lips. But then Even added, "Almost as much as I love Gabrielle," and Isak was wrestling him and they both ended up off the couch and on the ground so that, when Noora walked into the apartment, Even was hovered over Isak, singing the lyrics in his face, while the younger boy smiled through his pout.   
She sighed, dropped her backpack and took out her phone, taking a picture with a grumble.   
"Um?" Isak said, staring at the girl. Noora looked at him with eyebrows raised. "Why did you take a picture?"  
"I was snapping Eva," she explained with an eye roll. Even laughed.   
"Uh-oh," he said, "not Eva. Isak is so terribly shy, especially around strangers like Eva and Jonas and Magnus."  
Isak blushed, pushing Even off of him with a barely-held-back smile. "Shut up," he said, "And I am not shy."  
"Okayyy," Even drawled, planting a kiss to the smaller boy's forehead. Noora cooed at them, making Isak flush harder and Even laugh louder.  
“Come on,” Isak said, finally, wiggling out from under his boy’s grasp. “I have to do my homework for tomorrow, and so do you.”  
Even rolled his eyes again. “So studious. We just got home”  
“Research shows that getting all your homework done quickly leads to a healthier lifestyle.”  
“Research?” Noora asked, arching one eyebrow.   
“Ja? Why is research so goddamn funny to everyone?” Isak replied in exasperation. Even, grinning, swooped in and kissed his cheek, but the younger boy was still frowning grumpily.   
“Aw, we put him in a bad mood,” Noora said, cocking her head with a smirk.   
“I’m not in a bad mood,” Isak protested, quite moodily.   
Even smiled at him and smoothed back his hair, earning a glare that barely concealed Isak’s heart eyes.   
“Come on, Mr. Research,” the older boy teased, “let’s go do our homework.”

“Hey boys,” Isak said, rolling up to his friends with a grin. Magnus gave him a one armed-hug but none of them stopped having their conversation.   
“What’s going on?” asked Isak after his confusion didn’t clear up.   
“We’re talking about pansexual again,” Magnus explained. Isak smirked at his phrasing, ‘Talking about pansexual.’  
“What about it?” he inquired.   
“Well, bisexual is to like both, but so is pansexual,” Mahdi said.   
“Ja, so why are there two?” Magnus added on.  
Isak sniffled. “Well, pan is when you like everyone, not just boys and girls.”  
“What else is there?” Magnus asked innocently, earning a full-head eyeroll from Isak, a groan from Jonas and a disappointed laugh from Mahdi.   
“Trans? Nonbinary? That type of stuff,” Isak said. “Think of it like this, bisexual is like you’re attracted to people because of their gender, pansexual is like you’re attracted to people no matter their gender, yeah?”  
Magnus nodded. “Okay,” he said. There was a moment of relieved silence until he blurted out, “So is Even bi or pan? And you’re gay right?”  
The boys let out another round of frustrated yet amused protests, over Magnus’s sputtering, “What? I just want to get it right! Isn’t that a good thing?”  
“It’s good, man, it’s just not necessarily your business,” Jonas said.   
Isak smiled. “It’s okay, though, Mags. I don’t care about telling you, just, you probably shouldn’t go around asking everyone that type of stuff.”  
Magnus rolled his eyes. “Obviously. I’m not a complete idiot, guys.”  
They all gave him looks that said, “Are you sure?” Magnus glared around the little group.   
“Fine, fine,” he said, “I don’t need to know. It’s no big deal, I don’t even care-”  
“Yes, I’m gay,” Isak cut him off. “And Even is pan.”  
Magnus smiled and nodded. “See?” he said after a moment, addressing Mahdi and Jonas. “Now we all know, so you two won’t embarrass yourselves or insult anyone by calling Even bi.”   
The other two begrudgingly nodded. 

After school that day, the four boys and Even met up to go grab some pizza. “For real, though, it was, like, the best sex we’ve ever had,” Magnus said. All five of his friends were laughing and shaking their heads and groaning.   
“Just… why do you think we want to hear this?” Mahdi asked, pain in his voice.   
“Just because you never talk about what you do with girls doesn’t mean I won’t,” Magnus said. Jonas made a low ooh sound and Isak laughed, but Even looked thoughtful.  
“It’s true though, Mahdi, you never tell us about any action you get,” he said. Mahdi rolled his eyes, and Even grinned. “Don’t you have any sexy secrets?”  
At that, Isak nearly choked. “Sexy secrets?” he asked. The other boys were laughing at the expression as well. “I cannot believe those words just left your mouth… holy fuck, I’ll never be able to look at you the same again.”  
“Come on,” Even laughed, “we have plenty of sexy secrets.”  
Isak blushed and gagged. “Neiii,” he said, shaking his head, “stop. Please never say it again. I can’t deal.”  
“Say what? … Sexy…. Secrets??” Even smirked. Isak turned away from him.   
“We’re breaking up. I’m marrying Mahdi.”  
“Yeah, bro!” Mahdi exclaimed, high fiving Isak. Jonas’s eyebrows were high on his forehead.   
“What happened to, ‘I’d so bang Jonas’?” he asked in disbelief.   
“I did not hear about that,” Even commented with a smirk. Isak was blushing profusely.   
“First of all, I said I’d bang Jonas first if I had to chose between these three idiots, and, second,” he turned to Jonas, “this is why I’d marry Mahdi, because you can’t keep your mouth shut.”  
“I did get second place,” Mahdi said seriously.   
“Magus got last?” Even asked, which made the blond boy burst back into the protests about his bangability that Isak had hoped he’d never hear again. Soon they were all ganging up on Isak, laughing and arguing.   
“Enough!” Isak exclaimed. “This whole thing started because Even was grilling Mahdi on his-”  
“Sexy secrets?”  
“Hookups!! THEREFORE I would appreciate if we got back to that topic.”   
The boys were still all giggling as they settled down. “True, though, Mahdi, you’re a closed book,” Jonas said after a moment.   
Mahdi put up his hands. “What I do is my business. Plus, I’m not that into hookups. If I get with a girl, it’s usually because I really want to, not just for the sake of doing it. It’s not like there’s something wrong with hookups for hookups’ sake, just… not my scene.”  
They all nodded. “Wait, fuck, we walked past the place,” Magnus said after a second. They all groaned and turned around. 

That night, Isak and Even were in their bed, doing homework. Isak was working very hard, as always, except Even wouldn’t stop being annoying and distracting him, even as he protested half-heartedly.   
“You’re so cute,” Even said, playing with his hair. Isak smiled but kept his eyes on his bio homework. Pressing his face closer to the younger boy, Even kept grinning. “Come on,” he said, “can’t I get one little kiss.”  
Isak shook his head ever so slightly.   
“Please?” Even begged, resting his head on Isak’s chest. The smaller blond then very rudely put his papers over Even’s face and continued working, earning an offended gasp and his homework being thrown across the room. Isak started to protest but Even caught his mouth in his own before he could.


	14. Chapter fourteen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lol more smut, sorry:)

Chapter 14  
Even: What are you doing?  
Isak: ...sitting in class?   
Isak: what else would I be doing?  
Even: Helping me get rid of this boner.  
Isak: fuck even I can't skip  
Isak: why are you hard?  
Even: Thinking of what you did last night. How good you were for me.  
Isak: I'll be out in ten minutes. Well go straight home.  
Even: Can't wait<3

Isak clicked off his phone and tried to focus on whatever his French teacher was saying. But Jesus, Even texting him, telling him he was hard, reminding him of what they did last night... it didn't do wonders for his attention span.   
He awkwardly tried to pull down his hoodie as he thought about what he would be doing with Even in just under half an hour. The person sitting behind him didn't seem to notice but Isak was growing increasingly red as he got increasingly hard. "Fuck Even," he thought, closing his eyes and trying to will the erection away. No matter what he tried though, his mind always ended up wandering back to his boyfriend's body, touch, hard cock filling him up-  
"Mr. Valtersen!"  
Isak's eyes snapped to the teacher. "Hmm, ja?" he said, startled but playing it cool.   
"If you'd been paying attention, you would know I was just asking you what the narrator means when she says she and her mother switched rolls."  
"Oh, um... well, as soon as her mother is mocked by that man, she becomes quiet. The narrator has to speak for her and protect her. So it's like she's the mother."  
Still looking vaguely unsatisfied, the teacher nodded. Isak swallowed and relaxed. 

"Halla," Even said lowly as Isak approached, but the younger boy was having none of it.   
Isak hated PDA but he was hard, horny and pissed off so he just growled, "Shut up," before slamming a very wet, needy kiss onto Even's mouth. "I got hard in French thinking about you," Isak whispered as he pulled away. "Because of that I got all distracted and the teacher called me out. You better make it up to me." By this point he'd grabbed Even's hand and was dragging him towards the bus stop. Smiling, the older boy let himself be pulled away. The bus ride itself was incredibly tense. The two boys were eye fucking each other the whole way, both of them up to the challenge of not looking away. Only when Isak pressed his hardness into Even's thigh and whispered, "Gonna be so bad for you, Even," did the older boy curse and look to the ceiling. Isak smirked. 

At the flat, Even wrapped both his arms around Isak's waist as he tried to unlock the door.   
"Are you ready to have me inside you?" he asked. "Filling you up so good, making you go numb? You ready, baby?" He'd been sucking long, sloppy kisses along Isak's neck between these words. The younger boy tried to get the key in the lock, almost shaking with desire.   
Finally he got the door open and the two burst in, slamming it shut behind them as soon as Isak pulled out the key. He immediately attacked the older boy, wrapping both arms around Even's neck and pulling their bodies together, not caring as his kisses got wetter and messier. He pressed his hips to Even, trying desperately to get their bodies even closer together.   
"Is anyone home?" Even panted between kisses.   
"Don't care," Isak said back, dragging him towards their room.   
Even was quick to pull off his t-shirt, quick to toss it aside. "You're so fucking hot, baby," he said, pulling Isak back against him. The younger boy pulled his own shirt over his head, breaking their kiss only for a moment.   
"Mm, wanted you all day," Even breathed into his mouth, making Isak whine. He struggled to get off his pants before kicking them aside. Even easily removed his and then pushed Isak back onto the bed.   
Isak desperately clawed at Even's hair as the older boy arched over him, sucking marks along his jaw, on his collarbone.   
"Mm, you ready baby?" Even asked as Isak got more needy, grinding his hard cock against Even's hips.   
"Lay down," Isak said, suddenly scrambling to turn them over. His body had a sheen of sweat coating it and Even couldn't help but think about how absolutely beautiful he looked. But he was still a little confused.   
"What? You wanna top?" the older boy asked. He wouldn't be closed off to the idea, he just thought Isak didn't have any interest.  
"Nei," the smaller boy said, "I... I wanna try riding you."  
Even's eyebrows shot up. He looked at his lovely boyfriend, who was flushed with shyness and embarrassment from such a bold statement. He had never thought about Isak riding him but... damn did it sound hot.   
"Okay, baby," Even said, leaning up to kiss Isak's cheek gently. "That sounds great. I'm ready."  
Isak nodded. "It might... I don't know if it'll be good though. I might mess up."  
Smiling fondly, Even ran his thumbs over the younger boy's cheeks. "Of course it'll be good. Everything you do is perfect, baby."  
Isak took a shaky breath. "Okay," he said, "but you still gotta get me ready."  
Even smirked and pulled Isak's hips down a little so that the younger boy was hovering over his stomach, ass in the air. He looked into Isak’s eyes as he lubed up one finger and stuck in in his ass, quick and without much warning. The younger boy let out a squeal and buried his face in Even’s chest. “Fuck,” he breathed, “fuck you. I’m already pissed off.”  
“I know, baby, I love when you’re mad,” Even breathes, adding another finger. Isak, who’d already been sucking on Even’s chest, let out another sharp noise and bit down on the soft skin there.   
“Are you ready?” he asked, to which Isak nodded and took in a shaky breath.   
“Okay, sweetie. Just, here, get situated,” he said softly, grabbing Isak by the hips and positioning him so that Even’s cock was at his rim.   
“A-ah,” Isak moaned out, head tilted back as he lowered himself down. He hissed out a breath, hunching over a little and to place both hands onto Even’s chest. He curled his knuckles as Even bucked his hips, thrusting deeper into him. “Shit, Ev,” he said, voice breaking.   
“You’re so pretty,” Even sighed, last word coming out strangled as Isak brought himself down again.   
“Mmm, fuck, it’s so deep,” he said, eyes squeezed shut. Even brought one of Isak’s hands to his face, kissing each finger slowly.   
“If it hurts,” he breathed, “we can stop.”   
Isak shook his head. “It’s… it’s really good, it’s just a lot.”  
“We can switch if you want,” Even said.   
Isak took a few deep breaths before saying, “No, I want this.”  
And then he was moving up and down again, harder than before. “Fuck fuck fuck,” the smaller boy hissed, clamping his thighs tighter around Even’s hips. He was shaking, grabbing at any part of Even that he could. “Mouth,” he choked out.  
“Hmm?” Even replied, his own hum strangled as well.   
“N-now, mouth,” Isak said again, grabbing wildly at Even’s hand. He couldn’t well bend over to find his boyfriend’s lips, or even neck or chest, in this position without snapping his cock, which, by the way was so fucking thick and long that he could feel it hitting his fucking diagram, so he picked up the hand and started kissing along his palm, wrist, fingertips. He started sucking on his fingers, slamming his ass up and down as Even arched his neck, burying his forehead in their pillow. Suddenly he bit down on Even’s finger, so hard that the older boy shouted and jerked his hand back.   
“Sorry,” Isak choked, “I- fuck, Even.”  
From this angle, Even had a good view of how the younger boy’s abs tightening as he scratched down Even’s pecs. He came with a loud scream, shuddering, cum splattering Even’s chest and even his face.   
“Fuck,” he said again as he lived out the aftershock. “Even, fuck, that was so good.”  
“Mmmhmmm,” Even drawled, before coming himself inside of Isak, body turning taunt as he dragged his nails along the younger boy’s hips.   
“I love you,” Even breathed as Isak carefully pulled off and fell in bed beside him. “That was great. I love you.”  
Isak curled into Even’s chest, putting his face over his warm heart. “I love you, too,” he replied, kissing his pec. He put one knee over Even’s legs and drew them closer to him. “Did you really like it?” he asked quietly, insecurity lacing his voice again.   
“Yes, sweetheart. I love you. And that was… that was amazing. I should piss you off more often.”  
Isak smiled and buried his face in Even’s chest.   
“You’re so cute,” Even laughed, kissing the crown of his head. Isak shook his head, still hiding his face. “Yes, yes you are,” Even argued, bringing his chin up. “You’re my sweet little angel.”  
Isak looked away, trying to contain his smile before scooching up a little to ask for a kiss. Even smiled and obliged, stroking the smaller boy’s face with his thumb.   
“Even! Isak! If you two are done in there, I would appreciate a little help with the laundry,” Noora announced, pounding loudly on the door. Isak squeaked as Even chuckled.   
“Just let us get decent,” he called back.  
Kissing the top of Isak’s head one last time, the older boy hopped up and pulled on a shirt.   
Isak, grumbling, followed suit. Once he was fully dressed he followed Even into the living room, arms hooked around his waist the entire time. He pressed lazy kisses to his back, not helping very much as Even, Noora and Eskild folded clothes.   
“Oh, Even, you have some scratches on your back,” Eskild pointed out casually, smirking. Isak groaned and tried to hide his face further.


	15. Chapter fifteen

Chapter 15  
Isak was curled up on the couch, playing a videogame on his phone. His knees were drawn up to his chest as he flicked through the mind-numbing pastime, waiting for Noora to get back with his food. Even was asleep in their room. He’d conked out after working on homework for hours, leaving Isak to wander around the flat. He’d asked Jonas if he wanted to come over, and then Magnus and Mahdi, but nobody was around. Noora and Eskild were out shopping and they’d promised they’d pick him up something to eat but that was almost an hour ago and apparently they still hadn’t left the store. Finally, out of a mix of desperation and actual desire to see her, Isak texted Eva.  
Isak: hey, you wanna come over?  
He turned off his phone and stared up at the ceiling, waiting for a ping. Eva always had her phone on her, so unless she was showering or something, he would get a response- now, actually.  
Eva: Sure! Right now?  
Isak: yeah, everyone is out and im bored  
Eva: Ok. I’ll get on the bus in a few minutes. See you soon!  
Isak smiled and turned on the TV. He let himself zone out for a while until, suddenly, their was a knock on the door. Hopping up, Isak opened it to a smiling Eva. “Hi!” she said, throwing her arms around him. Isak grinned.  
“Hey, Eva,” he replied, patting her back tenderly. Since they’d spoken at Christmas their relationship had gotten increasingly close. Half the time it felt like it used to, the other half it felt better than that. Eva followed him into the apartment, laying down on the couch. “So,” she said, “where is everyone?”  
“Jonas and the boys are all busy, Noora and Eskild are shopping, Even is asleep,” he explained. Eva sighed.  
“Why does everyone have to be so busy all the time?” she asked.  
“Why do you say that?” he laughed, “Have you also been ditched?”  
Eva sighed again and rolled onto her stomach. “Ja, by just about everyone. Noora is always busy with something, Vilde is being weird lately, Sana is knee-deep helping to plan her brother’s wedding, and Chris and Kasper, well…”  
Isak laughed and shook his head. “Yeah, they are a little hard to separate.”  
Rolling her eyes, Eva agreed with him. “Just a little,” she said sarcastically. “But enough complaining. What’s up with you?”  
The boy shrugged. “Nothing, really. Exams are over, we only have a few days left in school, everything’s chill.”  
“Oh! Even’s graduating this week! That’s crazy!”  
Smiling fondly, Isak nodded. “Yeah,” he said, “yeah, it is.”  
“Where is he going?”  
“The Nordisk Institutt,” Isak replied with a proud grin.  
“Yay! That’s so close, and so good!”  
“Ja, I told him he should go wherever he wants, not to let me affect his decision, but he really loved it and, honestly, I’m glad he’s gonna be close. I don’t know what I would do without him.”  
Eva gave him a huge smile and buried her face in the couch cushion. “You two are so cute!” she squealed.  
“Huh? Even, cute? He’s a fucking giraffe, I’m the cute one,” Isak replied, giggling.  
Suddenly, from the hallway, they heard, “Oh, please, I’m ten times cuter than you.” Eva and Isak whipped their heads around to see Even leaning against the doorframe, the biggest smile on his face, face and hair tousled from sleep.  
“Even!” Eva exclaimed, hopping off the couch to run into his arms.  
“Hei, Eva, I didn’t know you were here,” he said, laughing as she barreled into him.  
“Isak was lonely,” she explained. Even’s eyebrows shot up.  
“You could’ve woken me, babe,” he said, to which Isak rolled his eyes.  
“As if. You needed sleep.”  
Even smirked as Eva dragged him into the living room. “So,” he said, “I’m not cute?”  
Isak bit down on his tongue in an attempt to hold in his smile. As soon as Even was sitting next to him on the ground, he crawled into his lap and planted a kiss on his nose. “Not at all.”  
Isak wasn’t big on showing too much affection around anyone, not even the boys, but Eva was different. She was happy for them in a way that was completely pure. Of course the boys loved seeing them together but of course they’d still tease him if he got too soft around them. Vilde thought they were cute in a way that made him a little uncomfortable. He knew she meant well, but all the “I love two boys together! It’s so crazy that people think there’s something wrong with it, you know?” made him wrinkle his nose. Of course, it wasn’t nearly as bad since Even gave her a little talk about fetishizing gays. He hadn’t expected her to burst into tears and say, “I just don’t want anybody thinking I’m homophobic, you know? There’s nothing wrong with being gay!” but he’d done his best to comfort her while explaining his message. Now she understood a little more, so she didn’t make as many cringe-worthy comments. But Eva… Eva was just happy for them. No teasing. No weird repressed homophobia. Just… happiness.  
“Hey, Even?” Eva asked now. “How did you… how did you know you were into guys?”  
They both grew quiet. “I’m not- I’m not trying to pry,” she added after a moment. “I just…” she sighed with a small, bittersweet smile. “I think I’m bisexual. You guys are the first people I’m telling, but I don’t wanna, like, come out if I’m wrong? I don’t know, it’s probably stupid-”  
“Hey, it’s not stupid,” Isak cut in. “Come on, Eva, I was in the closet for litteral ever. It’s not stupid.”  
She nodded with a small, appreciative smile. Even cleared his throat. “Well, as for me, I just knew. I liked boys like I liked girls. Why do you think you’re bi? Because if it’s because you like girls like you like boys, you probably are.”  
“Well, yeah…” Eva trailed. “One girl in particular.”  
Isak’s jaw dropped. “Eva?!” he exclaimed. “Uh, do tell?!”  
Blushing, Eva looked away. “She… guess.”  
“Oh, god, I did the same exact thing to Jonas,” Isak groaned, making Eva laugh.  
“Okay, okay,” Even said, furrowing his brow. “Is it Noora?”  
“Noora? Nei, nei nei nei nei nei,” Eva said immediately. “She’s my best friend!”  
Isak laughed again. This conversation was eerily familiar. And then he thought of how Jonas’s next question had been whether it was the guy from Vilde’s group and he sat up straight. “Oh. Oh, oh my god! Holy fuck, it’s Vilde! You totally like Vilde!”  
Eva flushed and tried to contain her smile. “I- fuck, how did you know?” she asked.  
“She loves you, Eva! She basically told me!”  
“What?” Eva’s smile dropped. When there was quiet, she scrambled on top of Isak. “What did you say, Isak Valtersen?”  
Isak was looking at her with wide eyes. “Well, Vilde came over when I was sick. She asked how I knew I loved Even, and then told me she thought she was in love with somebody but they’d never love her back.”  
“And you think she meant me??” Eva all but shouted.  
Isak slowly nodded. “She kept referring to them as “they” and not “he,” so I think it was a girl, and you two make out at every other party and she does look at you like you hung the moon.”  
Eva fell back off of him onto her butt. “Is that why she’s being so weird? I thought it was because she knew I liked her and it made her uncomfortable!”  
“Eva,” Isak laughed. She was running her hand through her hair.  
“Holy shit, Isak, holy shit! Do you- do you really think she loves me?”  
Isak shrugged. “I do,” he admitted.  
“Oh my god! I- I think I love her too!”  
“Well that was fast,” the boy joked. Even was just enjoying the show.  
“Seriously,” Eva persisted. “Last year during Easter break we all went to Chris’s cabin and she was resting her head on my lap and I was playing with her hair and I just wanted to scoop her up. And I realized I might have a crush on her, but I’d never had a crush on a girl before. But then, all this year we just got closer and she’s such a sweet cutie and she’s so pretty and I just want to make her feel safe, you know?”  
Isak nodded. “Ja,” he said, looking at Even, “I know.”  
“Do you think… do you think I could ask her to come over here?” Eva asked suddenly. The boys balked in surprise.  
“Ummmm sure, but why?”  
“My mom’s not home and I don’t wanna be alone if it doesn’t go well, and… then also Noora will be here soon, and I just don’t wanna wait. I’ve already waited too long.”  
Isak grinned. “Yeah,” he said. “Call her.”  
Eva took a deep breath and pulled out her phone, clicking away before bringing it to her ear. They all waited in silence until she perked up, indicating that Vilde was on the line. “Hi!” she said nervously. “Hey. So I’m with Isak at his place, and… do you think you could come over?... No, nothing’s wrong, I just really wanna talk… Okay… okay, I’ll see you soon. Yeah. Bye.”  
Isak smiled at her as she announced, “She’s coming over!”  
They passed time by playing stupid games like my ship but Isak could see the fear in Eva’s eyes. When a timid knock at the door sounded, she shooed them to their room, but the two boys couldn’t help but eavesdrop. They had basically just set this up, after all. 

“Hi, Vilde,” Eva said, leading the blonde to the couch. Vilde was in a pink shirt and jeans, a headband tied around her head. She looked confused and nervous.  
“Is something the matter?” she squeaked. Eva smiled softly and shook her head.  
“No,” she assured her. “I… do you remember when you said just because you got turned on kissing me didn’t mean you’re a lesbian?”  
Vilde blushed and nodded.  
“Well, did you ever think, maybe, you… do feel that way for girls?”  
Eyes growing wide, Vilde shook her head. “I- I’m not supposed to like a girl this way,” she said softly eyes welling up with tears. Eva smiled, starting to cry, too.  
“It’s okay, Vilde. It’s okay,” she said. The blonde was avoiding her eye.  
“It’s okay that you don’t feel the same way,” she sighed, “I knew it wouldn’t work. I was just hoping-” suddenly Eva grabbed her hand.  
“Who said I don’t feel the same way?” she asked.  
Vilde looked up at her. “What?” she asked after a quiet moment. Eva nodded.  
“I… Vilde, you’re beautiful. And one of my best friends. And I really… I really want you to be my girlfriend.”  
Vilde blushed. “I’ve never been in a relationship before,” she admitted shyly. Eva rolled her eyes.  
“I know, silly. And I’ve never been with a girl. We’ll figure it out.”  
A tentative smile broke over Vilde’s face, but then it faltered. “But- what if I’m not good enough for you?”  
Laughing a little, Eva leaned forward and planted a firm, loving kiss on her mouth. When she pulled back, Vilde’s eyes were wide and happy. “You’re more than good enough. You’re the only one I want, okay?”  
Vilde was absolutely still for a moment. “You kissed me,” she said. Eva laughed again.  
“I did,” she affirmed.  
“I want to be your… girlfriend, too,” Vilde admitted after a second. Eva smiled again.  
“Do you want to go to my place? We can talk there,” she offered. Vilde nodded and walked out looking dazed. 

In their room, sitting by the door with it open, Isak and Even were grinning. “We’re like cupid,” Isak said.  
Even smiled and brushed back some of the younger boy’s hair. “You are,” he said, kissing it.  
Isak squirmed around to face him. “I love you,” he said. “I was just thinking about how rocky things were at first, hearing them get together like that, but I’m so glad we made it. I love you so fucking much.”  
Grinning, Even kissed his forehead. “I love you, too. So much, baby.”  
“Let’s get comfy,” Isak suggested, standing and helping Even up. They both got in their pajamas and set up a movie, cuddling Cardamom between them. She nuzzled into Isak and, when Noora got back with Eskild and the food, they smiled at her.  
“I think you should check in with Eva,” Isak suggested. Noora gave him a weird look but he only grinned.


	16. Chapter sixteen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Okay, a lot happens in this chapter!! Bath fluff, Jonas and Isak have a talk, Even meets Isak's mother, and graduation!

Chapter 16  
Isak was napping on the couch, feet on the arm, head tilted back. Even sighed, as he always did when he found Isak asleep some place at strange times. He hadn’t even been out of the room long, just long to change and put away his stuff after school. He’d left Isak in the kitchen making them something to eat, and yet he found him here.  
“Baby,” Even sighed, shaking his shoulder. Isak stirred and opened his eyes. He squinted up at him in confusion.  
“Hmm? What time is it?”  
“I only walked out of the room ten minutes ago,” Even laughed.  
Frowning, Isak rubbed one eye. “I had a nightmare last night,” he admitted sullenly. Even sighed and pushed his thumb along his jaw.  
“What was it about?”  
“My mom… mostly just all the stuff she used to tell me was gonna happen. And then halfway through she started screaming, ‘There’s a man in the room!’ and I was trying to find him but I couldn’t see very well and I kept thinking it was just my dad but then he came out and I’d never seen him before.”  
Still kneeling in front of him, Even wrinkled his nose and pressed back his hair before planting a firm kiss to his forehead.  
“I’m sorry,” he mumbled into the crown of his head. “You shouldn’t have to worry about that stuff.”  
“It was just a dream,” shrugged Isak.  
“Well, let’s do something to take your mind off of it,” Even suggested. “Get up.”  
Isak stood up and followed him, their fingers entwined together. “What are we gonna do?”  
“Here, make some cocoa and maybe get some cookies. I’ll draw us a bath.”  
“A bath?” Isak asked, raising his eyebrows. Even nodded.  
“It’ll make you feel better,” he promised. Isak sighed and tried to rub the sleep out of his eyes, but he went and got the food anyway.  
By the time Isak was walking into the bathroom, holding two mugs of cocoa and balancing a bowl of cookies in the crook of his elbow, Even had drawn them a full, steaming bath.  
“Here,” he said, taking off his shirt, “it’s ready.” Isak put the cocoa down on the rim of the tub and the cookies on the floor before removing his own clothes, as well. Even got in first, leaning back and spreading his legs wide. “Come on.”  
Blushing slightly, Isak climbed in between Even’s legs and leaned back onto his chest. The older boy started to massage his shoulders, placing a gentle kiss onto his neck. “What else happened today?”  
“Hmm, well… I got a 6 on my biology exam, a 5+ on my English and my French, and a 6- on my math.”  
“You’re so smart,” Even praised, peppering more kisses along Isak’s jaw. The smaller boy smiled softly and relaxed into him.  
“But what about you, Mr. Graduate?” he said, grinning. “You’re so old, Jesus. You’re like an old man.”  
“Well you’re the one bathing with an old man,” Even laughed, wiggling against Isak, who giggled.  
“Here, drink your cocoa,” the older boy said softly, picking up mug. Isak took it and had a slow sip. He tried to focus on how happy he was and not think about what he was putting in his mouth.  
“Are you excited to be out of secondary school?” asked Isak. Even nodded.  
“Christ, yeah. I’m ready to be out of this place.”  
“Even though we won’t be in school together anymore?” Isak pouted.  
Smiling fondly, Even kissed his temple. “Of course I’ll miss you. But we do live together, baby,” he reminded the smaller boy. “And the Stage and Studio Institute is only ten minutes from Nissen.”  
Sighing, Isak stroked Even’s knees. “I’ll miss seeing you in the halls.”  
“I’ll miss it, too.”  
“But when you make your movie about me it’ll all be worth it.”  
Laughing, Even wrapped his arms around Isak’s waist. “Who said I’ll make a movie about you?”  
“Um, you did. Several times. I think you even mentioned it today.”  
“Well, I take it back. I’m only going to make movies about interesting, attractive geniuses.”  
“Huh?!” Isak exclaimed indignantly. “Am I not the most interesting, sexy, intelligent person you’ve ever met?”  
Even shook his head with a grin, making Isak let out a little gasp. “What?” he asked, smiling and turning around. And then they kissed, but they kept having to stop because they were smiling too much. 

After they got out of the bath and dried off, the two boys were snuggling in bed. School was basically over and they had nothing to do but relax and lounge around. Suddenly, Isak’s phone dinged.  
“Who is it?” Even asked, running his hands through Isak’s curls. The smaller boy frowned as he opened the message.  
“My mom. She… she wants to meet you. She wants to know if we can have dinner tomorrow, and then… she said she’d come to graduation.”  
“Well, do you want that?” Even asked carefully. Isak was still frowning, clearly conflicted.  
“I mean, it would be… nice. She seems to be doing okay. And I feel like… well, I feel like you should meet her at some point.”  
Even nodded. “I’d like that,” he said.  
“Okay. Well then yeah, I’ll tell her we can meet her. Or should she come here? That could be better.”  
“Yeah, why don’t we do that?”  
Isak nodded and thumbed out a reply. Then he shut off the phone and dropped it onto the bed beside them.  
“Are you nervous?” Even asked.  
Isak shrugged. “I just hope she’s really as okay with this as she says. My dad said he was chill but then…”  
“Well, didn’t your dad first ask if you were joking and then kind of sweep it under the rug?”  
“Yeah, I guess.”  
“But your mom… she said she’s always loved you and would love you for all eternity?”  
Isak nodded.  
“That doesn’t sound fake to me.”  
Sighing, the younger boy curled his face into Even’s chest. “I hope you like her,” he admitted quietly. The older boy sighed.  
“Well, she is your mother,” he said. “And you’re the sexiest, most interesting, smartest person I’ve ever met. So I think I’ll like her.”  
Isak laughed through his nose. “You’re the sexiest person I’ve ever met, too,” he said.  
A knock sounded out their door. Eskild opened it and peaked in, smiling at the two boys in their soft hoodies, Isak resting sleepily on Even’s chest. “Halla,” he said, “do you want to watch TV with us?”  
“Mm,” Isak groaned, “don’t wanna get up.”  
Even smiled and leaned down to kiss the top of his head. “Come on, baby,” he said, wiggling his arm under Isak’s waist and sitting them both up. “We gotta be good roommates.” Isak flopped against him.  
“Fine, just stay in your little love-nest,” Eskild sighed dramatically. Isak harrumphed and finally got up, swinging his legs over the side of the bed. He followed Eskild out to the living room and found Noora with Cardamom on her lap on one couch and Linn wrapped up in her blanket on the other. Eskild plopped down beside Noora and Even beside him. Isak layed down over the two boys, making everyone else mildly uncomfortable with a grin. 

The next day, Mahdi had to make up one of his exams during lunch and Magnus was with his girlfriend. Even sat with his third year friends, so Isak and Jonas grabbed a bench outside.  
“So, we’ll be third years soon,” the dark haired boy said. Isak nodded.  
“It’s fucking crazy. It still feels like we just started first year, but also like we should’ve been out ages ago.”  
“I know,” Jonas said. “Man, we were so stupid last year.”  
Isak laughed and agreed. And then he thought of something. “Hey, Jonas?”  
“Hmmm?”  
“I… there’s something I need to tell you. I… I did something bad.”  
Jonas looked at him with sympathetic eyes. “I know,” he said. “Eva told me.”  
“She… what?” gaped Isak, visibly shaken.  
“She was drunk. She doesn’t even remember it. But I know.”  
“And you’re not… you’re not upset?” Isak asked, terrified. But Jonas shook his head.  
“I was,” he admitted. “It hurt, you know, that you’d do that to me. But… the more I thought about it, the more I understood. And the more I realized… well, it wasn’t completely your fault.”  
“What do you mean?” Isak said. “Of course it was my fault! I- I fucking-” he buried his head in his hands. “I’m so sorry, Jonas.”  
With a bittersweet smile, Jonas put one hand on Isak’s shoulder. “Hey,” he said, “it’s okay. I forgive you. And really, I… I didn’t handle things like I should’ve back then. I kind of knew that you liked me, you know? And it felt really good to have somebody look at me like that. With Eva, things were always so complicated, but with you… you just adored me. So I treated you… well, I treated you kind of special. Like more than a friend. And we are more than friends, but I knew… well, I knew I was leading you on, you know? Even though… even though I knew it hurt you. Which is pretty fucked up. So I’m sorry, too.”  
Looking at him with a furrowed brow, Isak shook his head. “Nei, it’s not nearly as fucked up as what I did,” he said. Shrugging, Jonas looked at the sky.  
“We’re gonna be third years, soon,” he repeated. “We’ve gotta let all that petty shit go. I forgave you. I’m not mad. And I know you’ll probably still feel guilty, because I know I do, but… we gotta move on, you know?”  
Slowly, Isak nodded. “I’m not mad, either,” he assured Jonas.  
“Good. I love you, man. Nothing’s gonna change that.”  
A million thoughts flashed through Isak’s mind, like how telling your friend you loved them was gay and girly and how he should just punch Jonas’s shoulder and tease him but he swallowed those thoughts and said, “I love you, too.”

 

That evening, Even was trying to get his hair to look right. “Your hair always looks perfect,” Isak commented.  
“Well, it has to look extra perfect for your mom,” retorted Even. The younger boy rolled his eyes.  
“She won’t care what you look like, as long as we’re both smiling.”  
“Then she sounds like a good mother.”  
Drawing in a breath, Isak considered this. “I guess… I guess she is.”

Marianne arrived at six thirty. Eskild and Noora had agreed to go out, and Linn would stay in her room. When Isak opened the door to let her in, he was surprised at how good she looked.  
“Hei, Mom,” he said, bending over to give her a hug. Marianne smiled at her son and squeezed him.  
“Hei, sweetheart. How are you?” she said into his ear, smoothing back his hair. Isak let a small smile take over his face.  
“I’m good,” he responded truthfully. “How are you? You look great.”  
“I feel great. My new medication is working well, my therapist is good. I’m very happy, Isak.” She beamed up at him and for some reason Isak felt himself tearing up.  
“I’m happy, too,” he said quietly. A fondness took over Marianne’s face as she noticed Isak’s wet eyelashes. He blinked quickly.  
“You were always so gentle,” she said, taking his hands. Isak nodded.  
“I… I miss you, Mama. You know, I really do. I’m not just saying it.”  
With a bittersweet smile, Marianne nodded. “I miss you, too, angel. But… I think this is how things should be. I think we’re both happiest like this.”  
Isak sniffled. “Yeah,” he agreed. “But maybe… maybe I could visit more, or something.”  
Since getting together with Even, Isak had gained an entirely new appreciation for his mother. Of course his childhood trauma, panic attacks, anxiety-induced insomnia and nightmares hadn’t gone away, but he… he wasn’t so angry anymore. He wasn’t so cold. And he decided to let himself love his mother again, and let himself be loved.  
“I’d like that,” Marianne said now. “But come on, this isn’t supposed to be a sad night. I want to meet that boyfriend of yours!”  
Isak laughed and led her inside. Even was setting the table, wearing a nice white button down and dark blue jeans. When Marianne walked in, he beamed.  
“Marianne!” Even said happily, walking to her. “I’m so happy to meet you.”  
Isak’s mother stood almost a foot shorter than Even, but he was struck by how similar she looked to Isak. The same eyes, the same mouth, even the same smile, which she was giving him now- full-faced and glowing.  
“I’m happy to meet you, too. Oh, Isak, he’s so handsome!”  
Isak groaned and blushed but Even laughed. “And you’re so beautiful! Isak, why didn’t you tell either of us we’d be meeting such attractive people tonight?”  
The younger boy was still grumbling but he couldn’t help but grin.  
The evening went flawlessly. Isak had never been so happy.  
“I love you, Mama,” he said as he walked her out. Marianne wrapped her son in a hug.  
“I love you, too, my sweet little boy.”  
Even bent down to kiss her cheek after she let Isak go. “It was a pleasure to meet you,” he said, and she gave him a warm smile. 

Two days later, Even was sitting nervously at his graduation dinner. His parents were there next to him, his mom squeezing his knee, as the principal gave a talk about how proud he was of all the third years. The teachers started passing around diplomas and, when Even was handed his, he stared at it like it was gold. He’d done it. He was out. 

Later, back at the kollektiv, Isak was cheering as is boyfriend showed off the piece of paper. Even looked adorably dorky with it, beyond excited. “Wooh!” he said happily when Even took a bow, basically modeling with the thing. Beside him, Magnus and Mahdi were yelling over each other, Jonas was grinning and clapping, and all the girls were screaming. Even found Isak’s eye and grinned so wide that the younger boy thought he might burst. 

That night, the two boys laid naked and sweaty beside each other in bed. “I’m so proud of you,” Isak said for the hundredth time that night.  
“Really?” Even joked. “You haven’t mentioned it.”  
Isak rolled his eyes and then propped his chin on Even’s chest, looking him in the eyes. “Hey,” he said, “you know what?”  
“What?”  
“This summer? We’re gonna have the best time.”  
Smiling, Even laughed and nodded. “We sure are, baby,” he agreed, leaning down to give Isak a peck.  
“We sure are.”


	17. Chapter seventeen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Isak goes to a party without Even and Elias is there...

Chapter 17  
"No," Isak said stubbornly. He was at a party at Jonas's and he'd already had three beers. Even couldn't make it that night, he had to go to some cousin's birthday. Isak had offered to come but Even had sadly responded that his aunt was pretty homophobic and he didn't want to ruin the party. "If it wasn't for Alex," that was his cousin, "I wouldn't go, but he doesn't deserve to have his birthday messed up just because of his mom, you know?"  
Isak had nodded. Of course he understood. But that did mean he had to spend Friday night without Even. He wasn't too upset- he was psyched to hang with his friends. But then he found out Jonas had invited Elias.  
Isak never really told Jonas how uncomfortable Elias made him. After the cabin, he stopped hanging around so much. But, whenever he did, Isak was overwhelmed with old insecurities and anxieties. Right now, though, he was just annoyed. He had already had three beers and Elias had been trying, for like ten minutes, to get him to do a shot of vodka.  
"Fuck off!" Isak said angrily, trying to walk away. But Elias grabbed his arm.  
"Come on," he said, "It won't hurt."  
Isak rolled his eyes. "I'm not having a shot."  
Laughing, Elias looked to Jonas, who was sitting on the couch across from them, and said, "Is he serious?"  
"I mean... one shot wouldn't hurt, Isak," Jonas said tentatively, earning a scoff and a glare from the blond.  
"What the fuck, man?" he asked. "God, I fucking hate when you do this."  
Jonas looked down with a frown. Elias laughed again. "Issy's no fun since he got a crazy boyfriend," he taunted, and Isak immediately punched his shoulder.  
"Shut the fuck up," he growled. Jonas had stood. He walked between them. "That isn't cool, dude," he said to Elias, who looked mildly annoyed for a moment and then rolled his eyes.  
"Whatever, man. I'm sorry, okay? I'll get you a fucking water bottle if it'll make you feel better," Elias sneered before wandering away. Isak snorted and sat back down, and Jonas sat beside him.  
"Why are you friends with that douche?" he asked. Jonas shrugged.  
"He's not always that bad. He's just drunk."  
Choosing not to comment, Isak sat in silence. Just then, a bottle of water hit his lap. He looked up to see Elias standing a few feet away. The dark haired boy winked before disappearing back into the crowd.  
"I'm gonna go find Eva," Isak said, standing and walking through the crowd. He found his friend drunk out of her mind and hanging off of poor, worried Vilde's shoulders.  
"Isak!" the blonde exclaimed. "Oh, I'm so glad you're here! Are you enjoying yourself?"  
Eva had thrown her arms around Vilde's neck and was sloppily trailing kisses along it. She whispered something that made Vilde blush and Isak took a sip of his water as an excuse to look away.  
"Um... sorry, what did you say?" Vilde asked after sitting down and laying Eva in her lap.  
"I didn't say anything," Isak replied.  
"Oh! Oh... well, how was your night so far?"  
"It's been okay," Isak asked. "It looks... it looks like you've got your hands full," he commented, taking another gulp of water. Vilde smiled.  
"Yeah, Eva loves parties," she said.  
"I do!" Eva exclaimed from her horizontal position. "I love getting drunk, Isak," she slurred. "Oh!" she added, covering her mouth with her hands, "oh, you don't get drunk! Because of Even! What a good boyfriend!" Eva pushed her face into Vilde's thighs. "I'm so glad you have such a good boyfriend, Isak," she mumbled. Vilde ran her fingers through her hair.  
Suddenly Isak got dizzy. Like, super dizzy. He put the half-empty bottle down and sat beside Vilde, shoving Eva's legs out of the way.  
"Woah," he breathed, putting his head in his hands.  
"Are you okay, Isak?" Vilde asked, placing one hand on his back. He tried to respond but ended up gagging, stumbling towards the nearest trash can. "How much have you had to drink?" the blonde asked worriedly.  
"Only- three beers," Isak stuttered. Vilde gently placed Eva's head on the couch and then picked up his water bottle. She uncapped it and sniffed.  
"Isak, this smells like it's got something in it. Where did you get it?"  
Shutting his eyes with a groan, Isak replied, "Oh, fuck. Fuck. I got it from Elias. I knew it tasted weird but I just figured it was my aftertaste or something. I didn't think the asshole would-" suddenly Isak grabbed his cramping stomach and moaned. "Fuck," he panted when the pain passed.  
"I'm going to call Even," Vilde said, getting her phone. Isak's head was pounding too much to reply.  
Just then, Elias walked by. He caught sight of Isak and burst into laughter. "Oh fuck, man, it really got you," he wheezed.  
"What the hell did you put in his drink?" Vilde asked angrily, stomping one foot. Elias made wide, "I'm so scared" eyes at her.  
"I snuck some of Jonas's mom's face wash in there," he explained after a moment. Isak doubled over as another cramp hit him.  
"Are you crazy? He could get poisoned!" Vilde exclaimed. Elias laughed again.  
"Relax, I put, like, this much in there." He held his fingers a centimeter apart. "And it said nontoxic. He'll be fine."  
Fuming, Vilde called Even. Elias rolled his eyes and walked away. 

"Halla, Vilde," Even answered, mildly concerned from the start.  
"Oh, Even, can you please come here? That asshole Elias put face wash in Isak's water and he's really sick."  
Even felt his stomach clench. He looked at the birthday party around him- which was winding down- and found his parents. He walked over to them, still holding the phone to his ear.  
"Is Isak okay?" he asked Vilde.  
"He's... oh, shit he just threw up. He's pretty shaky, Even."  
Grimacing, Even let his parents know what had happened. He thought of everything he was going to do to Elias when he got to Jonas's.  
"What's happening now?" he said into the phone.  
"I'm moving him into Jonas's bedroom. Everyone else here is too drunk to do anything, and I can't find Jonas."  
"Can I talk to him?"  
"Yes! One second." Even heard Vilde pass the phone. By this point he was getting on his bike, ready to head out.  
"Ev?"  
Even's heart broke at the sound of Isak's sick, scared voice. "Halla, baby," he said, trying to sound as soothing as possible.  
"Are you coming here?"  
"Ja, I'm on my way right now. Stay with Vilde, okay?"  
"Mmhmm," Isak replied, and then he made a horrible noise from the other end of the phone.  
"Even, I'm gonna send Eva to get Jonas," Even heard Vilde tell him, "but she's pretty drunk, so I don't know..."  
"Okay. I'm on my bike, so I gotta go. I'll be there in like twenty minutes."  
"Okay. Hurry."  
"I will." 

Even rode his bike faster than he ever had before. He used the thought of that douche bag fucking asshole poisoning his sweet boy as motivation. When he got to Jonas's, he let himself in.  
"Even!" Chris B exclaimed upon seeing him. She pushed Kasper off of her. "Oh my god, hei! We thought you weren't coming!"  
"Where's Isak?" Even asked, looking through the crowd of people.  
"I don't know..." Chris replied before going back to making out with Kasper.  
Even pushed past them. He suddenly spotted Jonas leaning against the wall talking to Mahdi.  
"Hey, where's your bedroom?"  
Jonas looked at him in surprise. "Oh, hey. I didn't know you were coming. Um... why do you need my room?"  
Mahdi laughed, "Come on, man, it's Isak and Even."  
Shaking his head, Even said, "No, Elias put fucking face wash in Isak's drink and now he's in your room with Vilde throwing up."  
Jonas's eyes got wide. "Fuck, man. What the fuck? Where is Elias?"  
"I don't know!" Even exclaimed. "Where's your room?"  
"Right down the hall," Jonas replied immediately, and Even ran.  
"Issy, baby," he said softly, opening the door. Isak was slumped against the foot of the bed. Vilde paced around nervously, face lighting up when she saw Even.  
"Oh, thank god you're here," she said, throwing her arms around him. "I-I felt his forehead and I don't think he has a fever. He hasn't thrown up in a while so I think he mostly got it out of him."  
“Okay,” Even said, rubbing her back absentmindedly. He realized Vilde was shaking after a couple moments.  
“Hey, are you okay?” he asked, pulling away. Vilde took a deep breath and nodded.  
“Yeah,” she assured him, “I was just really worried, and I didn’t know if I should call poison control, but Elias said it was nontoxic and I checked and it said so, but, still, I could never forgive myself if something happened that I could have prevented.”  
Even smiled softly. “You were awesome, Vilde,” he assured her. “Seriously, I don’t know what would’ve happened without you.”  
Allowing herself a small grin, Vilde blushed. “Well… I care about Isak. A lot.”  
“I know,” Even said fondly. “Thank you.”  
Isak’s eyes fluttered open and he caught sight of Even. He held out his arms and drew his knees to his chest.  
“Hey,” Even said, immediately walking and sitting beside him, pulling the smaller boy into him. “Hey, sweetheart. We’re gonna go home, okay?”  
Nodding, Isak put his arms around Even’s neck and let himself be stood up.  
“Vilde, thank you so much,” Even said, taking the blonde’s hand and squeezing it. Vilde nodded.  
“I- I think I’ll go find Eva,” she said.  
The three left Jonas’s room. Isak clung tightly to Even, stumbling over his own two feet. His head felt like it was splitting in half.  
“Hey, did Valtersen have too much to drink?” somebody asked quietly. Even glanced around to see Ingrid and Sara and the other Pepsi Max girls watching worriedly. “I thought he gave up drinking,” one of them whispered.  
Suddenly, a tall girl ran into the group. “Guys, Jonas and Elias are fighting- Elias spiked Isak’s drink and-” she caught the looks they were all sending her and turned around, blushing at the sight of Isak and Even. “Oh! Oh, I’m so sorry!”  
“Did you say Jonas and Elias are fighting?”  
“Um, yeah. Jonas was super pissed about…” she gestured to an slumped Isak.  
Although he wanted more than anything to destroy that asshole, Even knew that he had to get his boy home, and so he just kissed the side of his head and took him out the backdoor.  
“God, I feel like somebody’s sawing through my brain,” Isak muttered into Even’s neck. The pain was making him dizzy and incoherent but he wasn’t drunk.  
“I know, love. We gotta walk home.”  
“Walk?” Isak asked through his teeth.  
“Unless you think you can stay balanced on my bike.”  
Shaking his head, Isak let Even lead him through the blocks. At one point, he dropped to his knees and gagged up some bile while Even pressed small circles into his back with his thumb.  
The made it to the kollektivet around eleven p.m. “Eskild?” Even called as he sat Isak down and got him some water.  
“Eskild?!” Even left Isak alone for a minute to go check the older man’s room. He knocked before opening, but was still subjected to Eskild bare ass in the air as some guy he didn’t recognize laid beneath him. “Sorry!” Even exclaimed, finally understanding how Noora felt a year ago.  
He rushed back to the kitchen, where Isak had one head on the table. “Here, keep drinking. I looked up what to do when you drink face wash and a nurse on yahoo answers said to drink tons of water and try nibbling on some crackers.”  
“Somebody else got into this mess?” Isak laughed, a small smile briefing his face before he doubled over again.  
“Ja, some American girl swallowed face wash while brushing her teeth and washing her face at the same time,” Even replied, smoothing back his hair. Isak shook his head in disbelief. He drank a few glasses of water and managed some dry toast before asking to go to bed.  
“Can you walk?”  
“Yeah, it’s not so bad, now.”  
Standing, the smaller boy walked to their room. Even followed him and got them both some nice, comfy pajamas. “Here,” he said, climbing into bed and patting the area beside him. Isak crawled over and rested his head on Even’s chest.  
“How was your night before you got poisoned?” he joked. Isak groaned at the mention of his little adventure and sighed.  
“It was okay. I missed you, and Elias was being douchy the whole time. Vilde was worrying about Eva, Mags disappeared and Mahdi and Jonas were wasted. I was hanging with Noora and Sana for a while. That was nice.”  
“Were you discussing biology?”  
“Ha, nei. School’s out, in case you missed the memo.”  
Even chuckled and smoothed back Isak’s hair. “What are you gonna do about Elias?” he asked after a brief quiet.  
“Do? I’m not gonna do anything. This is… this is just how he is.”  
“Isak, baby, he spiked your drink. He also used to sexually harass you-”  
“It wasn’t like that, he was just messing around.”  
“Well, whatever it was, he’s an asshole. And he’s awful to you.”  
Isak was silent.  
“Him and Jonas got in a fight before we left. I don’t know if you heard- you were pretty out of it.”  
“Oh, no. I didn’t. Why?”  
“Why?! Because he spiked your drink!”  
“Oh. Jonas knows.”  
“Ja, I told him.”  
“Okay.”  
“Was that wrong?”  
“No, no, I just… he really likes Elias.”  
“Well, that doesn’t mean he can just push you around. And Jonas gets that. If you just told him how far Elias goes, he would’ve done this awhile ago.”  
Isak shrugged. Just then, Eskild knocked on the door. “Hey, what was up before?” he asked, fully dressed now. “Seemed pretty urgent.”  
“Some prick spiked Isak’s drink with facewash,” Even explained.  
Eskild’s eyebrows went up. “Are you okay?” he asked Isak.  
“Fine. Now. I threw up a lot.”  
“Okay.” Eskild walked over and sat beside them, putting one hand on Isak’s back. “That sucks, bud. Who is this asshole?”  
“Elias. Jonas’s friend.”  
Rolling his eyes, Eskild responded, “Some friend.”  
The three boys sat there for a while, until Eskild said he’d better get back to his guest.  
“I’m sorry I ruined your night,” Isak mumbled after the older man left. Even looked down at him.  
“Hey, my night was not ruined. I got to spend more time with you, didn’t I?”  
A small, shy smile creeped on Isak’s face. Even grinned. “There we go, now we’re smiling.”  
Tilting his chin up, Isak asked for a kiss, making Even wrinkle his nose. “Ew, you’re all throwupy.”  
Pouting, Isak looked away again. But Even only guided his jaw back up and kissed him anyway.


	18. Chapter eighteen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Isak sees Elias after the party. Fist fight ensues:/

Chapter 18  
“How did you not know?” Eva asked incredulously. She was at Jonas’s. She’d walked over that morning, after waking up cuddled in Vilde’s bed in Vilde’s softest pajamas with a killer hangover and getting news about what had happened last night. She’d called Isak, making sure he was okay at least one hundred times. After she was assured she’d called Jonas, who asked her to come over. Once she arrived, they sat on his bed. He had a cut on his upper lip but was otherwise unharmed. The fight had been quickly pulled apart.  
“How… how long… has Elias been this bad with Isak?”  
Eva stared at him. “Jonas…” she trailed nervously. “Forever.”  
“But like, what had he done?”  
“Well… when we all stayed at the cabin last year, I got up in the middle of the night because I heard something and Isak was crying and, like, hyperventilating on the deck. He said Elias made him uncomfortable. He would grab Isak’s butt and call him a… faggot.”  
Jonas drew in his brows. “Why didn’t you tell me, Eva?” he asked. And that was how they got to her, “How did you not know?”  
“How would I know?” Jonas replied.   
“He’s not subtle,” Eva said sadly. “What happened before he spiked Isak’s drink last night?”  
“He… he was trying to get Isak to do shots, and then he said Isak wasn’t fun anymore since… he got a crazy boyfriend.”   
“What did you do?”  
“I… I said maybe one shot wouldn’t hurt. But then when Elias called Even crazy, Isak shoved him and I broke them up and told Elias that wasn’t cool. So he left. And he got Isak water. We thought it was a joke or something. Isak asked me why I’m friends with him and I said he’d not that bad, he was just drunk.”  
Sighing, Eva cocked her head at him. “Oh, Jonas.”  
“I-I didn’t think he was that much of an ass, you know? But after what he did I was so fucking mad, I didn’t even think.”  
“I know,” Eva said. “I would’ve done the same thing if I were you.”  
“Do you think Isak hates me?” Jonas asked, his voice almost cracking.   
“What? Jonas, nei. Nei. Isak loves you, and looks up to you and is grateful for you. He knows you never meant for Elias to hurt him.”  
“Okay. Yeah. Should I go over there?”  
“Maybe call him first? He’s probably pretty shaky after drinking facewash.”  
“Yeah. I’ll do that. Thanks, Eva. For coming and stuff.”  
“Of course,” Eva replied, putting one hand on his back. They sat like that for a moment and then she smiled. “I’ve gotta go, okay?”  
“Okay. I’ll see you at the picnic later, right?”   
“Yeah.”

Isak woke up in Even’s arms, something he adored. He was sore and achy from yesterday and his head still hurt a little but he felt alright. Wiggling up to Even’s cheek, he planted a kiss there. “Good morning,” he whispered in the older boy’s ear. Even stirred and looked down at him before smiled.   
“Halla,” he said, voice growly from sleeping. “How are you feeling?”  
“Okay.”  
Even chuckled. “Okay enough to go to the picnic today?”  
“Ja. It’s probably the last time I’ll see some people until next year.”  
Even nodded. He leaned down to kiss Isak’s forehead before getting up. “Come on, you need food and water to get your stomach settled,” he said. Isak grimaced as the cold hit his body but he got up. 

That afternoon, Isak, Even, and a lot of their classmates were sitting around a park, food and drinks being passed around, everyone having a good time. “I’m gonna go find a toilet,” Even said into Isak’s ear after a moment, leaving him alone on a blanket with Jonas, Eva, Sana and Mahdi. Mahdi and Sana were discussing philosophy while Eva, Jonas and Isak were rehashing old memories. Jonas seemed nervous about something that Isak couldn’t place.   
Suddenly, somebody tapped on his back. Isak turned around and immediately scowled. Behind him, Elias was standing with a sneer.   
“What?” Isak asked. A bunch of other people were glaring at Elias, too.   
“Hey, I just wanted to say sorry for last night. I didn’t know you would get so sick,” the dark haired boy said, but it didn’t sound sincere. Isak rose his eyebrows.   
“Thanks,” he replied shortly. He didn’t want to talk.  
“You know, that was a really shitty thing to do,” Eva said.   
“Yeah, man. You crossed a line,” Jonas added. Isak sighed. Apparently others did want to talk.   
“Sorry Isak got pissy and I went too far with a joke,” Elias said, shaking his head. Isak looked back towards him in annoyance.   
“I got pissy?” he asked, standing. “Fuck you, man, you were trying to get me drunk when I clearly wasn’t interested, of course I was pissed.”  
"Are you kidding me?" Elias asked. "You're the one who was being a fucking prude all night."   
Isak started to walk away, trying not to care what the dark haired boy was saying.   
"Come on, Issy, lighten up! God, can't you take a joke anymore? Can you believe this kid?" Elias asked some of the people beside him. He continued to speak, quite loudly. "I mean, first he pretends to be straight for, like, ten years. Then, when he finally comes out as a faggot, he gets a faggy boyfriend who's too crazy to deal with his own shit and makes little Isak quit having any fun."   
By this point, Isak had stopped. He stood perfectly still. With a low voice, he growled, "What did you call him?"  
"What?" Elias sneered. "Faggy? Crazy? I mean the list goes on- you are dating a fucking princess psycho path."   
At this, Isak spun around and was flying towards Elias so fast the bigger boy actually looked scared.   
"You don't EVER talk about him!" Isak shouted, grabbing Elias by the shirt collar and shoving him hard, forcing him to trip back a good five feet. "Can you get that through your thick head?" he hissed. "If you ever mention Even again, I will kill you."   
Just as Isak turned to walk away, Elias smiled. "It's not my fault you're dating a maniac," he said, and something in Isak snapped.   
He wasn't sure if the crack of Elias's nose against his knuckles was actually that loud or if he was just imaging things, but he did know that the hard, angled ridges of the bigger boy's face were slowly softening, becoming mushy as Isak brought his fist down again and again, and they were on the floor, Elias pinned underneath him as he just kept punching, breaking skin, deforming cheek bone, bruising eye. Elias grabbed him by the chest and tried to flip them, getting a few successful pops in during the process. Blood gushed down Isak's face as they struggled, Elias shoving the blond off of him. Landing on his butt, Isak scrambled to get back up, throwing himself at the bigger boy once again, but Elias got a quick hit to his face that sent colors he'd never seen before swimming behind his eyes and his body stumbling backwards. Elias surged towards him, and his fist hit Isak's face again, but Isak was punching back, hard and without restraint, and he felt his knuckles connect with something that snapped and Elias let out a pained shout before dropping to his knees. He clutched his collar bone, which was purple and swelling.   
Swaying, Isak looked down at him. "Never talk about him again," he spat.   
He tried to walk away but suddenly he was very dizzy. He looked down at his shirt and his vision swam; there was so much blood.   
Stumbling to a chair, Isak collapsed. He could vaguely hear Elias howling about a broken collarbone but there was such a bad ringing in his ears. "Isak?" he heard a worried voice exclaim, and he looked up to see Even's pretty blue eyes, but then his pupils started to get bigger until they ate away the world and everything was black.

"Isak..."  
"Should we clean him up?"  
"Here... change his shirt..."   
"Put him in bed..."  
"Isak, I love you, baby."

When Isak finally fluttered open his eyes, he was alone in bed. He looked around, squinting at the light. Sitting up, he sucked in his breath. When he lifted up his shirt, he grimaced. There were dark purple bruises spread across his torso and he was cut in a few places. He was sure his face didn’t look much better.   
Hobbling to a mirror, he found that he was right. He had a black eye and his cheek was split open. “Fuck,” he sighed, touching the cut and then hissing. Just then, the door swung open. Isak spun around to see Even standing, staring at him wide-eyed.   
“Hei,” Isak whispered, and then Even was rushing him and wrapping him in the tightest hug. Sure it hurt but it also felt so good. Isak let himself melt into Even’s arms, a little shaky from all the emotions he’d felt that day. Even was peppering kisses all over his head and neck and face.   
“Fuck, fuck, baby, don’t scare me like that,” he sighed, running his hands over Isak’s curls. “Seriously, you can’t just go around fighting people, okay? You terrified me. Do you know what I would’ve done if you’d been more hurt?”  
Isak let out a trembly breath. “I’m sorry,” he whispered.   
“What did he even say to you?” Even asked, pulling away.  
Looking down, Isak tried to avoid Even’s eye. “Nothing,” he muttered.   
“Isak. I know you wouldn’t get in a fight just because he spiked your drink.”  
“He…” Isak looked around. “He called you a maniac.”  
Even’s eyes got wider. “You got in that fight because… of me?”  
“Well he can’t just say that about you!” Isak exclaimed, voice cracking as tears sprang into his eyes. Even reached out and touched his cheek.   
“Baby…” he sighed. “I’m sorry you got hurt for me.”  
Isak shook his head. “Nei, that fucking asshole deserved it. He called you crazy, Even.”  
Even shut his eyes. “Is that how your friends see me?”  
“What? God, no! Elias isn’t a friend. My friends love you. Everyone loves you. And that’s why I got so mad, because how can he just say that about the most caring, smart, perfect boy I’ve ever-”  
And then Even was hugging him again, pressing kisses to his jaw and his cheekbone and finally on his lips. “I love you so much,” he whispered into Isak’s mouth, drawing out a small, needy sound. “Look at you,” he continued, pulling his face back. “All cut up. My sweet boy.”  
Isak blushed. “It’s not that bad.”   
Raising his eyebrows, Even waited a beat before leaning in and kissing Isak’s forehead. “Come on,” he said, “I made lunch.”  
Isak followed Even out of their room and into the kitchen. Noora was waiting with a steaming cup of tea, hot towels, hydrogen peroxide, neosporin and bandaids. “Come here,” she ordered. Even then proceeded to feed Isak some food while Noora fixed him up. When he let out a gasp at the sting of the disinfectant, Even spun around.   
“Are you hurting him?!” he asked, rushing to Isak and wrapping both arms around his chest.   
“It just stings a little, but I gotta do it or else it’ll get infected,” Noora explained, concentrated on her handiwork.   
“It’s really fine, babe,” Isak assured Even, but the older boy stayed protectively by his side, squeezing his hands and kissing his head whenever Noora put more of the stuff on him. Even looked like he was in more pain that Isak. When Noora was finally done, Even rushed to the couch and set up some pillows and blankets for Isak.   
“Come on,” he said, “I’ll put something on.”  
Isak smirked. “I’m not dying, Even,” he said.   
“Oh, please, like you’re going to come home bloody and bruised and I’m not going to do this,” Even retorted.   
Rolling his eyes, Isak walked to the couch and sat down.   
“Are you comfortable?” Even asked.   
“Very.”  
“Good.” The older boy leaned down and placed a kiss to the crown of his head. “By the way, you look ridiculously hot like that,” he commented. Isak grinned.   
“You know how I’d be more comfortable?” he asked.   
Even shook his head. Gesturing for him to come closer, Isak whispered in his ear, “With your cock in my ass.”   
Blushing, Even felt himself get hard. “Fuck,” he cursed. Watching something on TV would have to wait.


	19. Chapter nineteen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is really short! Sorry!

Chapter 19  
Even rolled over in bed. He had just woken up from a dream and he checked the time. It was only four thirty two in the morning. Sighing, he put his phone back on the nightstand. Isak was curled up beside him, ribs poking out in a way that worried Even, eye swollen and bruised, cheek red and scabbing.   
Frowning, Even draped one arm over his waist and drew him close, kissing the back of his head.   
Isak let out a sleepy sigh as he adjusted to Even's hold around him.   
"What would I do without you?" Even thought.   
Eventually, he drifted back to sleep, Isak was warm against him. He woke up again a little while later-it was still dark out- but the younger boy was gone.  
"Isak?" he whispered loudly after registering the empty space beside him. There was no answer.  
Standing, Even walked towards the bathroom. He was rushing, scared something had happened. But when he got there, Isak was just putting a bandaid over his cheek.   
"Halla," he said, eyes wide with surprise but still tired. Even let out a breath of relief before grabbing Isak and holding him tight.  
"You scared me," he said quietly.  
"I'm sorry," Isak replied. "I woke up and this was bleeding. I just came to put something over it."  
Even pressed a kiss to his temple. "It's okay."  
"You know, you can't be such a worry wart all the time," Isak reprimanded, earning an offended huff from Even.   
"Worry wart? It's not my fault you can't go two fucking days without smashing your chin against a table or catching a deadly disease or getting poisoned or getting in a fight!"  
"What can I say?" Isak asked. "I'm a magnet for trouble."  
Rolling his eyes, Even pulled away and placed a light kiss on the inside of Isak's wrist. "Come on," he said, holding the smaller boy's hand. "Let's get back to bed."  
Isak let himself be guided to their room. He crawled under the covers, resting his face in the space between Even's neck, the pillow and the mattress.   
"You'd tell me if you weren't sleeping well?"  
Isak sighed. "Ja."  
“Promise?”  
Scooching up to plant a kiss on Even’s cheek, Isak nodded. “Promise.”

When Even woke up for a third time, it was finally light out. Isak was breathing evenly beside him, tickling his neck. Gently moving away from the younger boy, he slipped out of bed and into the kitchen. Noora and Linn were at the table. “Good morning,” he greeted them, putting on a pot of coffee.   
“Hei, Even. How’s Isak?” asked Linn. Her hair was pulled back away from her face. She looked pretty.   
“He’s good. Started bleeding last night, but he’s all patched up now.”  
“Good,” Linn nodded. Noora rolled her eyes.   
“Why do boys feel like they have to fight all the time? If somebody spiked my drink I would just report them.”  
Even sighed. “Well, it wasn’t just that he spiked his drink. He also said some things.”  
“What? There are very few things somebody could say that would make me that upset.”  
“It does seem like a lot of energy,” Linn commented.   
Taking a deep breath, Even replied, “Well, the things he said weren’t about Isak. They were about me.”  
Swallowing whatever she was about to say, Noora stared at him. “Oh.”  
“Yeah.”  
“Well… honestly, I might’ve punched him, too,” she admitted, slightly sheepish. Even chuckled.   
“And you, Linn?” he asked. Linn rolled her eyes.   
“Duh.”  
“Well great. Then I know I have the toughest kollektivet in town at my back.”  
“What about the kollektivet?” asked Eskild, popping into the kitchen.   
“You’d all beat somebody up to defend my honor,” Even replied with a grin.   
Smiling, Eskild raised his eyebrows. “I know I would, but you got these two to agree?” He pointed between the girls.   
“Ja,” Even said.   
With a pleased look on his face, Eskild said, “Impressive.”   
They were all smiling and chatting when Isak came out, eyebrows drawn in.   
“Hei,” he said, glaring at all of them. Nobody thought it was unusual; Isak was always grumpy when he woke up.   
“Halla,” Even replied, a huge smile taking over his face as he walked to Isak and planted a kiss on the top of his head.   
Noora remembered the first time she’d seen such an exchange go down between Even and Isak. She remembered how her heart had swelled for Isak, who she always knew was hurting but never knew how to help. She remembered how confused, shaken and elated he’d looked. Now, he looks just as elated, but there’s no more fear.   
“How did you sleep?” Even asked softly. Isak shrugged.   
“Okay. I woke up a lot.”  
Cocking his head to the side, Even frowned. “I’m sorry,” he sighed. Isak shrugged again.   
“So, boys, what are the plans for today?” asked Eskild, leaning back on the counter.   
“Staying in and chilling,” Isak replied immediately.   
“Yeah,” Even agreed. “I think we’re done going out for a while.” He ran one finger over Isak’s swollen cheek.   
“Are you feeling okay?” Eskild asked with concern.   
“Well my body hurts like a bitch but I’m fine,” the shorter boy replied.   
“I’ll change your bandages later,” Noora said. Isak nodded.   
“Okay, well, Linn and I have shopping to do,” announced Eskild after a moment. Everyone looked at them in surprise.   
“Shopping?” Isak asked after a moment. Linn nodded. They didn’t question it further.   
Gathering their shoes, the two headed out. Noora stretched. “I guess I’ll go get dressed,” she said, heading to her room.   
“Halla,” Even greeted Isak privately, pressing a kiss to his jaw. Isak tilted his head sideways and smiled.   
“Halla.”  
“Come shower with me,” Even said, pulling Isak close by his waist.   
Isak smirked. “Why?” he asked teasingly, earning a dark look from Even.  
“Because I want you, baby,” the older replied, whispering into Isak’s ear in a way that sent shivers up his spine.   
Smiling earnestly now, Isak nodded. Even leaned in and planted a gentle kiss on his mouth before leading him towards the bathroom. The morning was soft and quiet. White sunlight filtered through the windows and painted them delicate and gentle. Propping Isak on the sink, Even started to grace soft kisses down his neck. Smiling, Isak looked up at the ceiling. He took off his shirt and Even did the same. They made eye-contact for a still moment.   
“I’ve never felt so much love,” Even breathed after a second. “Never like I do for you.”  
Taken slightly aback, Isak blinked. “I- I haven’t, either,” he admitted.   
“I know we don’t talk about the future,” Even continued nervously, “but… do you think we’ll get married someday?”  
A quiet grin taking over his face, Isak nodded. “I do,” he said. “And we’ll have cats. And maybe a dog. I think you’d like a dog.”  
“I would like a dog,” Even agreed, chuckling.   
“And we’ll have a daughter,” Isak said suddenly. It was Even’s turn to be taken aback. This was new. This was… deeper.   
“A daughter?” he asked, joy creeping into his voice. Isak nodded.   
“A daughter. And she’ll be so happy, baby.”  
Smiling so wide that his eyes disappeared, Even leaned forward and kissed Isak. “I love you,” he said tenderly.   
“I love you, too.”  
They were both smiling, faces bright with happiness, and then Isak was pulling Even back to him and they were kissing, bodies flush to each other as Even pulled him off the sink and turned on the water, breaking apart for a moment, to strip completely before finding each other again. Because they always found each other.


	20. Chapter twenty

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: SMUT!! Also jealousy and kittens and coffee:)

Chapter 20  
“Will you go grab us some seats?” Isak asked sweetly, giving Even a cheeky smile.  
“Fineeee,” Even sighed. “You’re lucky I love you.”  
Cocking his head, Isak scrunched his nose. “Well this is awkward,” he said, earning a huff. And then Even realized something and narrowed his eyes.  
“What?” Isak asked.  
“You’re acting like Sana.”  
Head rearing back in surprise, furrowing his eyebrows. “I what?”  
“You’re acting like Sana! When you turned your head and scrunched up your face, you looked just like her! It reminded me of something that I couldn’t place, but then I realized she made that exact face when I asked how you were doing in biology back at the Christmas party.”  
“Nei,” argued Isak, shaking his head.  
“Yes! You know how sometimes you get so close with somebody that you start picking up their habits? You’ve picked up Sana’s habits.”  
Rolling his eyes, Isak scoffed. “I have not.”  
“You have,” Even insisted, chuckling. He hooked and arm around Isak and nuzzled into his hair. “It’s okay, I like Sana. I don’t mind that you’re turning into her.”  
Giggling, Isak tried to push him away. “Stop, I am not,” he said. Even laughed and pulled away from him.  
“Okay, not-Sana, I’ll just go get us a table.”  
“Good,” Isak sassed him. Even glared over his shoulder, but, as soon as he turned away, he smiled.  
He grabbed a chair beside a tall, dark haired boy and a pretty brunette who’d just sat down. Taking out his phone, Even tried to pass the time, but he couldn’t help but overhear the table next to him.  
“He’s cute,” Even heard the boy say, and he glanced over to see who they were looking at. His stomach got tight when he followed the boy’s gaze to Isak, who was bouncing on his heels, looking up at the menu.  
“You should go talk to him,” the girl encouraged, smiling. Even involuntarily raised his eyebrows.  
“How do you even know he’s into guys?” the boy questioned.  
Shrugging, the girl replied, “He has the rainbow pin on his jacket and he just seems, I don’t know, like he likes guys!” Even resisted the urge to roll his eyes. He’d been the one to force Isak to wear the goddamn pin after Eskild brought it home for him from a pride parade. Even wanted to go punch the other guy in the face, with his stupid, handsome grey eyes and charming smile.  
“Doubtful,” he was telling the girl now.  
“Hey, if you go ask for his number, I’ll give you five bucks.”  
Ask for his NUMBER? Even nearly stood up and flipped their table but he knew he had to keep his cool. After all, he was snooping. And the dude hadn’t even done anything yet.  
But then the dark haired boy got up.

Isak was standing in line. He wanted to be at the table with Even but everyone was taking forever to order. When he felt somebody come up behind him, a smile spread across his face and he turned around, expecting to see his boyfriend. Instead, a tall, dark haired, grey eyed boy had come up behind Isak and was giving him a grin.  
"Hi," he said, smiling. "I'm Andreas."  
"....Isak," the blond said nervously. He glanced around; the coffee shop was small, so Even must have noticed what was happening, right?  
Unfortunately, Even was on his phone. He didn't look over his shoulder once.  
"So I know this is upfront, but my friend over there," he pointed to a smiling brunette in a short dress. She waved. "Dared me to come over and ask for your number."  
Drawing in his brow, Isak stared at this new person. Andreas was grinning in a way that made Isak very uncomfortable. He wondered why on earth he was assuming that he liked guys. But, then again, Eskild said he'd known Isak was gay from the beginning. Maybe some gaydars were just that good.  
"Oh, um..." he said awkwardly.  
"I'm sorry to be so aggressive about this," Andreas apologized. "Although you are really cute."  
Isak flushed out of embarrassment. Just then, Isak saw Even stand up and begin to walk over. He looked at him with pleading eyes.  
"Who's this?"  
Isak sighed as Even asked the question. Andreas looked up at him with nervous eyes.  
"Hi, I'm Andreas," he said. "I just introduced myself to Isak here."  
"Oh. Well, I'm Even," the taller blond replied. "Come on, baby," he added to Isak, reaching to Isak and slinging one arm around him. "Let's get the drink and go back to ours.”  
Smiling sheepishly at Andreas, Isak turned around. He felt Andreas move back towards his table. Even didn’t say anything until they got the drinks and walked away, despite their plans to stay. As soon as they were block over, Even stopped.  
"What the Hell was that about?" he asked angrily, glaring back in the general direction of the coffee shop.  
"I don't even know... that dude asked for my number. Said it was on a dare," Isak sighed, shivering. Even looked pissed.  
"Who does that creep think he is?" he spat, making Isak raise his eyebrows.  
"It wasn't that big of a deal," he said softly, taking Even's hands. The older boy finally made eye contact with him.  
"Do you know how fucking hot you are?" he asked. Isak blinked. "Because you are," continued Even. "I see guys and girls checking you out everywhere we go."  
"Does that.... bother you?" Isak asked quietly.  
"Fuck yeah! I hate those pervs thinking they can have you. You're mine."  
Eyes widening slightly, Isak said, "Well... a lot of people look at you, too. You are a goddamn model, after all."  
Even rolled his eyes. "Shush, you're the model," he reprimanded. "I hate seeing other people looking at you like they want you."  
Heart melting a little, Isak took Even's face in his hands. "Hey," he said. "I'm yours. Nobody else's. Just yours."  
Even softened. He pressed his mouth to Isak's, taking the younger boy by surprise. Luckily nobody was around, so he returned the kiss. "All yours," he murmured.  
“Let’s go home,” Even sighed, pulling away. They sipped their drinks nervously on the walk back to theirs. Even kept one hand on Isak’s lower back the whole way.  
“What were you thinking when that guy was looking at me?” Isak asked suddenly, voice higher than normal with nerves. He didn’t usually try to get Even going like this but he was shaky from his encounter and he wanted to feel needed.  
“Hmm?” Even hummed, turning to him slightly.  
“What were you… thinking about?”  
“I was thinking about how much I wanted to punch him in the face,” Even replied, anger lacing his words.  
“Yeah?”  
“Yeah. Looking at you like he wanted you. Made me want you, baby.”  
Smirking, Isak looked at him. “I want you, too,” he said.

The got home quick. Isak went to put his drink down but Even wasn’t having it. He grabbed the smaller boy by the neck and brought his face up, smashing their lips together. Isak dropped the coffee cup on the ground, the lid popping off and what little was left spilling. “Fuck, baby,” Even sighed, trying to take off Isak’s belt without hesitation. “Fuck that guy, looking at you. You’re mine.”  
He trailed wet, sloppy kisses down Isak’s neck before taking off his shirt. Isak shuddered, letting out a shaky breath.  
“Come on,” Even said, wrapping his arms around Isak’s waist. The smaller boy hitched his legs around Even’s hips and let himself be carried to their room. Once they got their, he tossed Isak onto the bed and hovered over him.  
“Take your pants off,” he ordered. Isak swallowed and removed his jeans and his boxers. Eyes dark, Even continued, “Open yourself up for me.”  
Blinking a couple of times, Isak stared at Even.  
“Come on, baby,” the older boy added soothingly, placing a gentle kiss on his cheek.  
Shaking, Isak turned over so that he was on his knees and slowly pressed one finger into himself. He reached for the lube and got himself slicked up before adding a second.  
“What are you thinking about, baby?” Even asked, placing a kiss in between his shoulder blades. He was standing on his knees behind Isak, painfully hard from watching his boy do this for him.  
“Y-you. In me,” Isak gasped.  
Trailing his kisses lower, down towards the small of his back, Even smiled. “Yeah? And not that other guy?”  
“No,” Isak moaned into the pillow. “Just you.”  
“Always me?”  
“Always you.”  
“Why, baby?”  
“Because- because I’m yours. A slut for you, babe. I- I can’t help myself for you.”  
Positioning himself at Isak’s hole, holding the smaller boy’s hips, Even swatted his hand in a signal to pull out. He lubed up. “I know, baby,” he replied before pressing in.  
“E-Even,” Isak groaned, voice cracking, squeezing his eyes shut.  
“What, baby?” Even asked teasingly, rolling his hips against Isak, getting deeper.  
“F-faster.”  
Even listened, pulling out and thrusting harder, faster. Isak shuddered. He let out a shaky gasp as Even hit his prostate. “Fuck, f-fuck, Even,” he said through his teeth.  
Even was still holding him by the hips, pulling them closer with every thrust. He let his nails drag long and painful. Isak was breathing heavily, inhaling sharply and whimpering as Even continued to slam in and out of him.  
He just wanted to feel Even in him like this forever. He let himself be turned over and gasped as Even sucked long, hard marks on his pale skin. Gripping his hair, Isak moaned the other boy’s name. When Even came up to his face, he pressed hot, desperate, open-mouthed kisses to the other boy’s lips. Even put one hand on his face, pushing down on his cheeks, dragging his nails along his jaw. “Such a good boy,” he breathed, making Isak tremble.  
“Close,” he said. Even nodded into his collarbone, biting down, and sharp, sensual, intoxicating pain bloomed there. Isak bucked his hips, making Even hit his sweet spot so hard that he let out a startled, wrecked sob.  
“Now,” he choked, curling his neck into Even’s shoulder as he came with a series of jolts, body tightening and spasming.  
“Good, good,” Even sighed, breath soft against Isak’s chest. Suddenly, he, too, tensed, and came with a shudder into Isak.  
Afterward a moment of afterglow, he pulled out, eliciting a hiss from Isak. He got a wet washcloth and cleaned them up, pressing soft kisses all over Isak’s body as he did so. Finally, he wrapped himself in a blanket, disappeared for a moment, and came back with Cardamom in his arms. “Scooch,” he said, pushing Isak over. The smaller boy whined.  
When they were finally settled, Isak nestled in the crook of Even’s arm and Cardamom kneaded the blanket between them, Even planted a kiss to the top of Isak’s head.  
“So, how did it feel?” the smaller boy asked. Even raised his eyebrows.  
“What?”  
“Having sex with Sana.” Isak looked at him seriously, earning the biggest eye roll he’d ever seen and a face full of pillow.


	21. Chapter twenty-one

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Isak and Even get in a fight, in which things are said:/  
> Pappa Eskild makes an appearance!

Chapter 21  
Isak was sitting on his bed, typing away with his laptop.  
When Even walked in, the younger boy looked so concentrated that he couldn't help but smile. "Halla," he said after a moment. Isak looked up and smiled.  
"Halla, baby. Did you hear about the new planets NASA discovered?" His face was so earnestly interested. Even grinned and shook his head.  
"Nei," he said. "Tell me about them."  
Isak patted the mattress next to him and Even sat down. "Well they just found seven new planets and a bunch of them are the size of earth."  
"That's really cool," Even replied. He really tried to put enthusiasm into his voice but man, science stuff was boring. Isak gave him a scrutinizing look before smiling.  
"You're not interested at all, are you?"  
Shaking his head, Even laughed. "No," he chuckled, "no, not really."  
Isak fake glared before rolling his eyes and planting a soft kiss on Even's mouth. Even smiled into it.  
After a moment the broke apart. Isak layed back, taking off his snapback and smoothing down his hair before putting it back on. Even had no idea why Isak did this so compulsively. His hair always looked perfect.  
"So what did you do today?" Even asked, laying beside him. Isak shrugged.  
"Nothing much. Messing around with Mags and Mahdi at Mahdi's place."  
"That sounds nice."  
Isak nods once. "Yeah. It was."  
"What do you want to do tonight?"  
"I don't know. Do you want to go out?"  
"Eh, sure. I think somebody's having a party."  
"That sounds chill."  
"Okay." Isak smiled, his whole face turning bright and cheery. Suddenly, his phone pinged. Isak lifted it off his chest and opened the message. His smile faded in a way that made Even's chest get tight.  
"Who's that?" he asked carefully.  
Looking kind of vacant, Isak dropped the phone down again. "Nobody," he replied. "Come on, I'll text Jonas and we'll figure out a place to go."  
Even frowned. He wanted Isak to talk to him but he didn't want to pry. After a while, he said, "Okay." 

A few hours later, Isak was sitting in Even's lap on the couch at some third year's house. He was tipsy after his third beer and Even, having only had one, was playing with his hair.  
"I love you so much," Isak mumbled into the crook of his neck. He wasn't drunk, but being sleepy and tipsy and emotional wasn't a very stable mix for him.  
"I love you, too, baby," Even replied fondly. He wrapped his arms tighter around Isak's waist.  
"Can we go home?"  
"Okay."  
It must have been around one a.m. Isak kept on staring dejectedly into space as they headed out and Even was worried about it. He kept one arm tightly around his waist and smiled slightly when Isak nuzzled his face into the crook of his neck and let out a quiet sigh.  
"Baby?" he mumbled after a moment.  
"Hmm?" Even hummed in reply.  
"When we go home, I wanna go to sleep."  
"Okay," Even replied. "We can do whatever."  
Isak's soft breaths tickled Even's collarbone. "I missed you today," he said after a minute. Even had been to visit his parents while Isak was at Mahdi's.  
"I'm sorry, sweetie."  
Isak didn't reply. When they got home, he slowly took his clothes off until he was just in his boxers. He washed his face and then sat on the edge of the bed and waited for Even to come back in. When the older boy did return from brushing his teeth, he frowned at the sight of his boyfriend sitting hunched over, forehead creased, eyes unfocused.  
"What's wrong?" He asked from the doorway.  
"Hmm?" Isak replied, jumping slightly. "Oh, uh. Nothing. I was just thinking."  
"Isak, you've been acting weird all day. Who texted you earlier?"  
There was a quiet moment until Isak smiled and said, "Nobody, really, just someone from school. It's not that, I'm just tired."  
When Even didn't move or reply, Isak crawled under the covers. "Come lay down with me," he said into the pillow. Sighing, Even agreed. He climbed in bed and draped one arm over Isak's fragile waist. "Goodnight," the smaller boy mumbled, and Even pressed a kiss into the back of his neck.  
"Night, baby."

Later, Even woke up to a sweaty, cold boy trembling in his arms. “Hey,” he said, propping himself up on one elbow to hover over Isak. “Hey, baby.” He gently shook Isak’s shoulder, but the smaller boy had his eyes squeezed shut and was clutching at his shirt, taking in shaky breaths. “Isak,” Even said, sitting up more and putting one hand on Isak’s cheek. His skin was clammy and pale.  
“Baby, come on.”  
“Isak!”  
By this point Even was sitting up completely and shout-whispering. Isak started to shake his head.  
“No, no,no,” he said, bringing his hands up to his face. “Please stop.”  
“It’s just me, sweetie, just me,” Even said, trying to calm him down, but Isak was still asleep and he was crying and suddenly he said something that terrified Even.  
“Pappa, please let go.”  
His voice was barely above a whisper but it stopped Even’s heart. The older boy stared at Isak as he shook. He wasn’t being violent. He looked small and scared.  
Even took him by one shoulder and lifted him up, pulling him into his chest and hugging him tight.  
“No, please,” Isak said, beginning to squirm and try to get away. Even held tight, pressing kisses to the side of his head, until Isak woke with a start.  
“E-Even?” he stuttered, pulling away. Even stared at him. “What are you doing?”  
“You were having a nightmare,” Even breathed, pulse racing.  
“I- did I say something?” Isak asked. He looked worried, like maybe Even had heard something bad.  
“Yeah,” Even said softly. “You were just saying no, no, no and when I started shaking you to wake you up you said …. Pappa, please let go.”  
Blinking once, Isak looked away.  
“Did your dad hit you?” Even asked quietly.  
“What? Nei,” Isak replied. He said it so fast it seemed rehearsed. Even stared at him patiently until he sighed and continued, “He used to… man handle me. Push me around. But he never, like, hit me.”  
Anger spiking in his chest, Even frowned. “How the fuck could he hurt you?”  
“He didn’t… it was nothing, Even. I don’t even remember the stupid dream. Just go back to bed.”  
He layed down, hiding his face in the pillow. Even layed beside him.  
“Was it your dad who texted you earlier?”  
“Will you stop asking about that?” Isak snapped. Even was taken aback. The younger boy was tense as he added, “Please. Just… let it go.”  
Swallowing, Even nodded. 

When Even woke up, Isak wasn’t in bed. He got up and went to the kitchen, where he found Isak drinking coffee next to Noora. It was only nine in the morning, way too early for Isak to be up.  
“Halla,” he said, walking up to the smaller boy. Isak avoided his eye.  
“Hei.”  
“Hei, Even! Can you come grocery shopping with me? Isak refuses,” Noora said. Even glanced between them. He wanted to stay at home, be there for his boy, maybe get him to open up, but he did owe it to Noora to help her out.  
“Okay,” he said.  
They left ten minutes later. Even left Isak in their room. His eyes were so dark and tired that Even wanted to kiss all the hurt away. 

“Noora, why exactly did Isak start living with you guys?  
“Oh, he hasn’t told you?” Noora asked, turning her back to the produce to raise her eyebrows at him.  
“Well, he gave me a vague story a while ago, but…”  
“Um… from what Eskild’s told me, he was really drunk at a gay bar one night. Eskild recognized him because me and Eva had been trying to figure out if he was gay and hooking up with Penetrator Chris- long story- so Eskild was helping by looking at his insta and looking for him on Grindr and stuff. So when he saw him at the bar he knew he was our friend, and he knew we was underage, so he brought him home. He said Isak was too drunk to walk and when he offered to take him back to his house, he started to cry and beg him to go anywhere else. And then he lived in our basement until I left and… yeah.”  
“Did his dad… why did he leave home, anyway?”  
G “His situation with his parents isn’t… good. But you know that.”  
“I know. But… I don’t know, last year and stuff, did he ever come to school with bruises or anything?”  
Noora looked at him. “Um, nei. Not that I noticed. We weren’t very close, though, so…”  
Running one hand through his hair, Even nodded. “Okay. Thanks, Noora.”

When Even got home, Isak was still on their bed. He smiled at Even but frowned when the older boy sat down with a serious look on his face.  
“What’s up?”  
Even took a deep breath. “What’s going on with you?” he asked after a moment.  
Sighing annoyedly, Isak looked away. “Seriously?”  
“What?” Even replied, confused. Isak stood up, running his hands through his hair.  
“I told you nothing was wrong. I told you I don’t remember stupid dream, I told you my dad never hit me, I told you who texted me. Why don’t you believe me?”  
“Because you’re lying, Isak,” Even replied, standing as well. “Or, even if you aren’t, you’re not telling me everything! Something is clearly wrong, you’re not sleeping, you’re having nightmares, and I- I don’t know how to help you if you won’t let me in!”  
“I’m not lying, Even, and yeah, maybe I’m stressed, but nothing is going on. You need to stop doing this, you need to stop trying to fix everyone. I never try to fix you!” Isak was red.  
“What, now I need fixing?” Even asked incredulously.  
“No! And that’s why I just try to be there for you instead of trying to make everything better all the time! You have to be there for me and let me come to you, you can’t just pry like this, Even!”  
“Come to me?!” Even said, voice growing louder. “You- you fucking- you fucker, Isak! What the fuck! When do you ever come to me? With the insomnia or the anxiety or the eating disorder-”  
“Don’t talk about that, I’m better now!” Isak said, voice breaking as he brought his hands to his head.  
“Oh, please! As soon as you get stressed you start living on coffee, and you know what? It terrifies me! Because I don’t know how to help without you reacting like this, like I’m being crazy! I can’t- I can’t get to you, I can’t talk to you!”  
“Even, this is not about you. If you feel like this is hurting you then that is tough, because I am trying. I am trying to make this easier and I’m sorry that it’s not working! But I’m trying!”  
“Are you? Because it doesn’t seem like it. To me it just looks like you’re still the boy in the closet, hiding all his feelings because feelings are too fucking gay!”  
He spat the last sentence in a way that made Isak’s jaw drop. The younger boy stared at the floor, willing himself not to cry. Blinking, Even realized all the nerves he just hit and tried to backpedal.  
“Baby,” he said, “baby, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean- I just want-”  
“Get out.”  
Isak said the words quietly. Even was taken aback. “What?”  
“Get out!” he choked. “You might live here but this is still my house, so you need to get out!”  
“Isak, I-”  
“Leave, Even, leave! Go!”  
When Even didn’t move, Isak spun to face him and threw his deodorant at him. “Get out! Go!”  
Backing away, Even left. He walked straight past Eskild when the older boy asked what was going on and down the stairs, and he kept going until he didn’t recognize where he was anymore.

Isak was laying face down in bed when Eskild knocked on the door.  
“Hey,” he said, opening it a crack. “Can I get you anything?”  
Isak shook his head into the pillow.  
After deliberating a beat, Eskild walked in. He sat beside Isak and put one hand on his back.  
“What happened?” he asked gently. Isak sniffled. He mumbled something Eskild couldn’t understand. “Hmm?”  
Rolling over slightly, Isak revealed red, puffy eyes. “We had a fight.”  
Chuckling softly, Eskild said, “I heard.” And then, more seriously, “What was it about?”  
“I- he- Even kept bugging me about me being stressed and I told him to just drop it, that I’d come to him when I was ready. And then he said I never come to him, and he brought up a bunch of shit that I’ve hid from him and I said that was different and that I’m trying and then he-”  
Isak’s voice broke as his eyes filled up with tears. With a bittersweet smile, Eskild rubbed his back.  
“He said I was still like the boy he met who was in the closet,” Isak continued. “Afraid to show emotions because emotions are too… gay.”  
“Oh,” Eskild sighed. “Oh, Isak.”  
“I didn’t- I’m not- that’s not why-” the younger boy stuttered. Eskild shushed him.  
“I know,” he said, “I know.”  
“I’m trying really hard to be better,” Isak continued quietly, voice high-pitched and trembly. “And I thought- I thought I was- a little better. At least.”  
“You are,” Eskild assured him. “More than a little. Isak, when I met you, you couldn’t even think about being gay. And, even after you came out, you hated people seeing you guys together. You remember the whole talk I had to give you about disrespect. But now? When I look at you? I see somebody older, and stronger, and braver. You’ve come so far.”  
Isak shook his head. “But- I just-”  
“Hey. Listen. I am so proud of you, Isak. When your dad came over that time, I kept wondering how he could bear to let you down. To hurt you. Because you are such a good kid, Isak. I love you. And for Even to say you’ve made no progress, that is not true. And that was wrong of him.”  
“I just feel like I fail everyone around me,” Isak said. He’d stopped crying. His voice was empty.  
“No. You don’t,” Eskild replied.  
“Maybe if I’d just been better, if I’d just noticed the signs, my mom wouldn’t’ve gotten so sick and my dad wouldn’t’ve left. And I wouldn’t’ve hurt… everyone.”  
“Isak. Look at me.”  
The smaller boy glanced up.  
“You haven’t failed anyone. Your mother’s mental health was not your responsibility. You were just a kid. And your dad? He’s an asshole. But you? You are good. And smart. And funny and courageous. And even though you smell and you never pay rent, you haven’t failed me. And I promise nobody else thinks you’ve failed them. You are so loved. Even loves you, even if he made a mistake and made it seem otherwise. But you... you do need to communicate with him. He deserves it. He messed up, but so did you. Don't hate yourself for it- you're learning. But you need to work on that, okay?”  
“I know. I'm sorry. I just… I’m just really tired of letting people down.”  
“Isak,” Eskild sighed, smoothing back his hair. “Please hear me. You haven’t let anybody down.”  
“My dad wants me to meet his new girlfriend. Or, she wants to meet me.”Isak said it fast and scared.  
“Oh? Are you… happy about that?”  
“He doesn’t want me to bring Even.”  
Eskild looked away.  
“He doesn’t want her to know that I’m…”  
“I’m sorry,” Eskild said quietly.  
Closing his eyes, Isak said, “That’s why I didn’t tell him… I didn’t want him to be hurt or upset or angry.”  
“That’s very brave of you,” said Eskild. “But when you get news like that? That hurts you? You gotta tell Even. So he can help you.”  
“I know,” Isak breathed. “It’s just really hard.”  
Eskild rubbed his back. “I’m so sorry, Isak.”

Eskild got up from his position on the couch with Noora. The knock at the door had been long and hard. When he opened it, he sighed at Even.  
“Where is he?” the blond asked.  
“In your room. Why don’t you… why don’t you and I have a chat.”  
“I know I messed up, Eskild, I just need to-”  
“No, you don’t know. So we’re gonna talk.”  
Eskild’s voice was so intense that Even shut up. Noora, watching from the couch, quietly got up and slipped to her room.  
Following Eskild to the kitchen table, Even sat down.  
“So. You had a fight.”  
“Yeah.”  
“Even, I need to tell you somethings about Isak. Things about before you guys met.”  
Even nodded.  
“Before you came along, Isak was… he was a different person. He barely came out of his room. He was grumpy and snappish all the time. He never let himself be happy or giggly or carefree. And if you think he’s closed off now-”  
“I don’t-”  
“Don’t interrupt me. If you think he’s closed off now, you should’ve seen him back then. He didn’t just hide the really deep hurt, he hid it all. The little problems, the big stuff, the happiness, the excitement. He pushed it all down. All away. And as much as I tried to help him, to get to him, he was… unreachable.”  
Eskild looked Even dead in the eye. “You reached him,” he continued. “You saved him. And so for you to say shit like he hasn’t grown, like he’s still in the closet… that is not okay. I understand that you were angry. I understand that you didn’t mean it. But there are lines you cannot cross. And that… that is one of them. Because it’s not true. Isak tries so hard to grow, to learn. He tries so hard to be comfortable in himself and to be open. Harder than anyone I’ve ever known, because it is so hard for him. And he’s come so far. And so for you to say shit like that, make him doubt himself all over again… you can’t do that. He was devastated after you left. Do you know what he said to me?”  
Even swallowed, trying to breathe. He hurt Isak, hurt his sweet, lovely boy, to the point where he was devastated and he broke him and-  
“He said he was tired of letting everyone down. That he feels like he fails everyone.”  
Bringing one hand to his face, Even covered his mouth. His eyes grew unfocused.  
“He messed up. A lot. He can't hide stuff from you. But all those things he’s been trying to get better at, being himself? You made him doubt it all over again. And so I’m telling you right now, if you ever do that again? I won’t forgive you. He might, but you won’t be welcome here. I won’t forgive you. Isak is good… he's gentle. So he might. But I won’t. So you… you can’t do that ever again. Do we understand each other?”  
Even wiped at his eyes. “I… yeah. Yes. We do.”  
Eskild nodded. And then he stood, putting one hand on Even’s shoulder. “You’re really good for him. He loves you. And I love you, we all do. I know you didn’t mean it. Please don't... blame yourself for this. Don’t think I hate you or anything. Everyone fucks up.”  
Nodding, Even stood. He let Eskild hug him. “Okay, now go apologize to Isak. He needs it.”

Even knocked on the door. There was no response, so he let himself in.  
What he saw broke his heart. Isak was curled up in bed, knees to his chest, squeezing the blue pillow. Even’s pillow.  
“I’m sorry,” the younger boy breathed, and Even was immediately by his side, smoothing back his hair.  
“No, no, baby, you have nothing to be sorry about. It was me, I fucked up. It was all me.”  
Seeming not to hear him, Isak squeezed shut his eyes. “I just- I didn’t mean to let you down.”  
“Shut up,” Even said. “You didn’t let me down. You never let me down. I let you down.”  
“Nei, I just- I should’ve just told you- but I just, I always fuck everything up. It’s just my dad’s girlfriend wants to meet me but he said I couldn’t bring you because he doesn’t want her to know yet and I just- I didn’t want to tell you because I thought you’d get mad or sad or- fuck, I’m sorry. I should’ve just told you, I’m sorry. God, why am I such a fuck up?”  
“Isak, stop,” Even begged. “You didn’t do anything wrong. Of course I want you to tell me about that stuff but- Isak, baby. Please don’t blame yourself for this. I am the worst, I was so mean and so wrong, baby, I was so wrong. And I knew I was wrong, I was just scared for you and upset that you wouldn’t talk to me, but I shouldn’t’ve pried and I should never have said what I said. It’s not true. You’ve come so far, you are so brave and so different now than you were. So much stronger.”  
Isak gripped the pillow tighter, hiding his face. “I’ll try to better, I promise,” he said, voice cracking.  
“I know, baby, you try so hard. I know. I’m so sorry I hurt you, Issy. I- I never should’ve said that shit. I’m so sorry.”  
“It’s not your fault.”  
“It is.”  
Isak sniffled. “I’m sorry, too.”  
“It’s okay. It’s okay.”  
Finally opening his eyes but still looking down, Isak said, “Will you… will you get in with me?”  
“Of course.”  
Even kicked off his shoes and climbed in bed beside Isak, wrapping both arms around his middle. The younger boy tucked his face into Even’s chest and let out a soft, shaky sigh.  
“So, your dad… are you okay?”  
Isak was quiet. After a beat, he said, “I’m just really tired.”  
Smoothing back his hair, Even pressed a kiss to the top of his head. “I’m so sorry, baby.”

When he checked the clock next, Even was surprised to see that it was almost eight at night. “What have you eaten today?” he asked cautiously.  
Isak didn’t reply. Even took it to mean nothing but the coffee this morning. (He was right.)  
“Please let me make you dinner.”  
There was silence, until Isak whispered, “Okay.”

When they went out into the living room, Noora, Eskild and Linn were all chatting. “Oh, there are the boys!” Eskild exclaimed. “Would you guys wanna watch a movie?”  
Isak, still red and trembly and tired, let out a breath. “Yeah,” he said after a beat. “That sounds good.”  
“Great. You can pick, we’ve been bickering anyway.”  
“Go find something,” Even said quietly, kissing the side of his head. “I’ll make us sandwiches.”

A while later, Eskild and Linn were cuddling on one couch, Noora was sitting on the floor with Cardamom in her lap, and Even was sitting with Isak tucked into his shoulder. “Please finish,” he said quietly, holding up the half-eaten sandwich.  
Isak took another couple bites. 

That night, Isak was wrapped up in Even’s arms. His face was still tacky with tears and he was drained beyond belief.  
“I’m so sorry, baby,” Even said into his hair.  
Squirming to face him, Isak said, “It’s okay.”  
Pressing a kiss to his forehead, Even sighed. “I love you so much,” he said. “I love you so much. I never wanna… I can’t mess this up. I would never forgive myself.”  
Reaching up to stroke his face, Isak replied. “You won’t. I love you, too. We won’t mess this up.”  
“What did I do? To deserve you?” Even asked. Isak’s green eyes grew soft. Instead of responding, he rubbed his nose against Even’s.  
“Promise you won’t leave,” he breathed.  
Even’s grip around his waist tightened. “Never.”


	22. Chapter twenty-two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> FLUFF! ALL OF IT!!!  
> Also a little smut at the end:)

Chapter 22  
Even pulled Isak further into the v of his legs, sucking softly on his neck. "Stop," the younger boy laughed, trying to push him away. He was supposed to be focusing on reading the article Jonas had texted him about the consumption addiction epidemic but Even wasn't letting him concentrate.  
"Nei, I can't help it," Even replied, pressing the kisses higher. He started to suck on Isak's earlobe, earning a shiver.  
"Jonas is going to kill me if I don't respond with some long, well-thought-out answer," Isak complained, voice taking on a whiny edge. Even chuckled.  
"Just tell him how you agree completely. Everyone loves to hear that."  
"Not Jonas," Isak sighed. "He expects consideration."  
"Hmm, you two are so smart. You're so smart, baby."  
Isak rolled his eyes. "Says the college student."  
"Oh, please, you're doing better than I ever have."  
“Ugh,” Isak moaned, “it’s summer. Why are we talking about school?”  
“Ask Jonas,” Even said.  
Rolling his eyes with his whole head, Isak looked back at him. Even grinned.  
“So,” he continued, “how did you two even become friends? Tell me the story of the greatest bromance of our generation.”  
Isak harrumphed, a noise so cute that Even couldn’t help but scrunch up his nose.  
“Well, if you must know, I moved to Oslo when I was eight. We were trying to, I don’t know…”  
He got quiet, eyebrows drawn. Frowning, Even nudged him gently. “Yeah?”  
“We were trying to have a fresh start, I guess. Mom was… getting worse. So dad said we could just… start over in Oslo. Anyway, I got transferred into Jonas’s class. I was never good at making friends, I was shy and scrawny and new… but I got sat next to Jonas because of our last names- Valtersen, Vasquez- and he was so cool and funny and brave. He was so nice to me and I liked him as soon as we met but I was so scared of getting close to him because usually… usually when I get close to people they, um, they don’t stick around. Or they hadn’t, up to then. We got tight, though, until one night, my mom completely lost it and I went to his house because… I didn’t know where else to go. And after that, he was there. Always.”  
Even ran his thumb over Isak’s cheek. “I’m so glad you two found each other,” he said softly. Isak gave a small smile.  
“Yeah,” he replied. “Me too.”  
Scooching around so that they were facing each other, Isak tilted his head up towards Even. “Tell me about Mikeal.”  
“I still can't belive you googled me,” Even replied, grinning, eyebrows up. “And I thought you thought I was so cool! You knew I was a big dork all along!”  
Resting his chin on Even’s head, Isak deadpanned, “Ja, I did. I let you think you were all cool but really I was just thinking about what a loser you are.”  
“Ugh!” Even exclaimed, pulling back. He looked at Isak with his mouth open in offense but instead of coming up with a response he just let it settle into a smile before leaning in and kissing the smaller boy.  
“But seriously! Tell me about your ‘best bud,’” Isak exclaimed after a moment, pulling away.  
“I told you, he was the last man of my life,” Even laughed. "Come on, let's talk about this minute. And my friends now."  
“Hmm? People I haven’t met?” Isak joked, earning a chuckle.  
“Yeah. I have a whole bunch of cool, secret friends.”  
“Cool like you? Mr. ‘Every time they kiss, a cat dies of AIDS’?”  
“Ja, exactly that cool.”  
The two boys stared smiling into each other’s eyes for a minute, until Even said, “So, why did you google me?”  
Groaning, Isak covered his face. “Well you were so mysterious! No social media, no full name! Taking all those goddamn paper towels. I needed answers.”  
Even wiggled his eyebrows. “Was I the tall, dark and handsome stranger?”  
“Hm, tall, yeah, you fucking giraffe. Dark and handsome not so much.”  
Gasping, Even looked at him incredulously. “What?” he breathed in English.  
Smiling, Isak shrugged. “Sorry,” he replied.  
Even glared at him momentarily before leaning in and rubbing their noses together. “I like that you stalked me,” he sighed. Isak giggled.  
“I like that you signed up for kosegroup for me,” he replied.  
“I like that you always have your mouth a little open.”  
Laughing with a little surprise, Isak fired back, “I like how you always wear layers.”  
“Yeah?”  
“Yeah.”  
“I like your curls.”  
“Curls?”  
“Yeah. Your golden little curls. When we were at the Halloween pregame, you were wearing that leaf crown, and that was the first time I’d really seen you without a snapback. And that was also the first time I realized how much I love your curls.”  
“Oi, is that why you committed a felony for me? Couldn’t control yourself around my hair?”  
“Ja, that’s exactly it. Just the hair, too. Nothing else.”  
“Wanna know a secret?”  
“Sure.”  
“Your hair got me going that night, too.”  
Even pulled away, scrunching up his forehead. “What did my hair look like?”  
“You don’t remember?”  
Staring at Isak, Even looked confused. And then a moment of realization broke over his face and he said, “Oh, that stupid fucking wig. Fuck. That got you going?”  
Smiling so wide his dimples came out, Isak laughed, “Yeah. It was so sexy. In fact, I’m only dating you so that when we get old you can grow out your hair and look that hot again.”  
Even was laughing hard along with him. “I forgot about that stupid thing. I must have looked hideous while you were sitting there all beautiful.”  
“Nei, you didn’t look hideous,” Isak giggled, pressing their foreheads back together. “Especially not in that pool, with your shirt all clingy. I’m sure my hair didn’t look too good, then.”  
“Your hair always looks good.”  
Isak blushed. “I like you,” he said.  
Cocking his head, Even raised his eyebrows. “Yeah? Really? I hadn’t guessed.” But, after a moment, he added, “I like you, too.”  
Isak, smiley and warm, planting a kiss on Even’s mouth, and then another and another. Soon they were making out, Even’s hand curled in Isak’s hair, the younger boy’s legs tightened around his waist, smiles breaking the kiss every once in awhile. Eventually, they made their way to the bed. Even pressed Isak down into the mattress, trailing ticklish kisses down the his neck.  
“Stop,” Isak laughed as Even whispered a few, feather-light pecks around his jaw. He wiggled his shoulders, arms around the older boy’s neck, and tried to bring their mouths back together. But instead of complying, Even kissed the tip of Isak’s nose and then pulled away.  
“What?” Isak asked, sitting up. “Is something wrong.”  
“Nei,” responded Even, “nothing is wrong. But we do have plans in approximately half an hour, so unless you want to show up to my parents flushed and sweaty and marked up-”  
“Ja, okay, I get it,” Isak replied, standing as well. “I forgot about dinner with your parents. Do I look okay? Should I shower?”  
“Hmm? Nei, you look fine. Besides, why would my parents care? They love you.”  
Isak rolled his eyes. “They’re still your parents, Even. I wanna look good for them.”  
“That’s very sweet,” Even said, planting a kiss on the top of Isak’s head. “But you look perfect. As always.”  
Isak glowed. 

 

That night, when they got back, Isak was tired. It was late and he’d just played a pretty intense game of Monopoly with Even’s parents, so he was pretty wiped out.  
“That was fun,” he said as Even hung up their coats.  
“I’m glad you had a nice time,” the older boy replied, turned to press a kiss to Isak’s forehead.  
“Wanna shower?” the younger boy asked. Even smiled.  
“Yeah. Sounds good.”  
“Okay, I’ll go get in.”  
Isak walked into the bathroom and took off his shirt. He got the water running before taking off his pants and boxers, too. When he got in, he let himself relax under the hot water.  
“Halla, baby,” he heard from outside the curtain. Peeking his head around, he smiled at Even.  
“Hei.”  
He watched, mesmerized, as the older boy undressed and then got into the shower beside him. Even dipped down to press a light kiss to Isak’s mouth, and smiled in surprise when the smaller boy involuntarily let out a needy little sound.  
“Well then,” he grinned, pulling back. Isak rolled his eyes. “Somebody’s desperate.”  
“Me? I’m desperate? I’m so chill, Even.”  
“Mmhmm,” Even hummed, still smiling, before pressing another kiss to Isak, wrapping his arms around his waist.  
Isak deepened the kiss, tilting his head up and slipping his tongue into Even’s mouth. “Mm, fuck,” he sighed, pressing his hips into his boyfriend’s.  
“What do you want, baby?”  
“I- I want your dick in my mouth,” Isak stuttered. Even grinned.  
“Okay,” he breathed into Isak’s ear.  
Slowly getting down on his knees, Isak placed a few gentle kisses along Even’s hips. The older boy was half-hard and getting harder as Isak softly kissed his tip and up to his base. Reaching behind Even, he grabbed his ass and pulled him closer before taking some of him into his mouth.  
“Fuck, so good, baby,” Even said, hunching over slightly, water dripping down from his hair, over his face. He bit his lower lip and let out a strangled moan as Isak started to move faster. Precum leaked into Isak’s mouth as he swirled his tongue around, trying to deepthroat as best he could. Even’s knees were growing a little weak as Isak moved quicker, glancing up at him with innocent eyes.  
Pulling away, Isak trailed more kisses on Even’s stomach, taking his hard cock in his hand and bringing it from the balls to the dick, fast, making sure Even didn’t stop feeling good. He pressed a kiss above his bellybutton and then another to his abs.  
“Mm, mouth again,” Even demanded, pushing Isak’s head back down. His voice was low and raspy in just the way Isak liked.  
Taking him back in his mouth, Isak sucked harder, moving his head forward and backward, trying to make it deeper, better, perfect for his boy.  
Wanting to try something new, Isak tentatively reached behind Even and pressed one finger to his hole. Even hissed, bucking his hips.  
“Yes,” he said to the unspoken question, and Isak pressed in. He felt around for Even’s prostate. They didn’t have any lube so he couldn’t fit another one in, but he continued finger-fucking Even from the back while sucking him off in front.  
“Jesus,” Even breathed. He understood why Isak liked him up his ass so much now.  
Isak continued doing everything he could to get Even over the edge. He started to hum, creating a deep rumble in his throat that made Even groan. “Fuck fuck fuck,” he choked, voice strangled.  
Isak could tell he was getting close; Even wasn’t used to this much goddamn stimulation. He’d already made it almost twenty minutes and so when he started to tremble into Isak’s mouth, the younger boy prepared himself.  
“Gonna-” Even choked before releasing into Isak’s mouth. The younger boy tried not to choke and swallowed dutifully, before standing and pressing a wet kiss to Even’s mouth. Even responded immediately. “That was so good, baby,” he said, voice breathy and weak. Isak smiled. The water had begun to get cold.  
“Good,” he said. “Now let’s get out and go to bed, and then you can help me with this.”  
He gestured to his own hard cock and Even smiled, licking his lips.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys!! I need suggestions!! Please leave comments with ideas for future chapters, I love writing prompts!!


	23. Chapter twenty-three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The squads play a game a truth or dare and Isak is the butt of several challenges:)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you guys for the suggestions! Keep em coming! Love you:)

Chapter 23  
Eva had decided to have a get-together with the boy squad and the girl squad. “We never have a party with just all of us, which is dumb. Isak and Sana are friends, me and Isak and Jonas are friends, Magnus and Vilde are friends, Noora and Isak live together, Isak and Vilde are friends, Chris and Mahdi are friends, Sana and Even are friends! Why do we have this intricate web of friendship but never all hang out?"  
So that’s how Isak, Vilde and Eva ended up on Eva’s living room floor, waiting for the others to come back with food.  
"Ooh!" Vilde said, clapping her hands. "Let's play truth or dare!"  
"Truth or dare?" Eva asked, furrowing her eyebrows. "Vilde, are we seven years old?"  
Isak laughed at her. "Says the girl who forced us to play my ship two years ago."  
Rolling her eyes, Eva defended, "I had a reason, though! I was trying to be a sleuth."  
"Mmhmm," Isak hummed. Vilde was looking around with wide eyes.   
"When did you play my ship?" she asked, glancing between them. She looked worried, like they'd been hanging out without her knowing. Eva smiled warmly and put one hand on the blonde's thigh. "A long time ago," she said. A tiny, happy grin rose over Vilde's face at the contact and she blushed.   
Breaking up their moment, the rest of the gang returned, each with various drinks and snacks. Vilde lit up.   
"Would you guys like to play truth or dare?" she asked hopefully.   
Magnus smiled. "I'd love to!" he replied. Mahdi and Jonas were too unfamiliar with Vilde to voice their disinterest and Even was too busy staring at Isak to say anything. Sana rolled her eyes. "Seriously, Vilde?" she asked.   
"It is a little childish," Noora commented. Vilde looked to Chris with pleading eyes but she only shrugged.   
"I think it'll be really fun," Eva suddenly said, taking in how Vilde wilted. She put one arm loosely around Vilde's waist and the blonde beamed.  
"Ja, me too," Magnus added. Suddenly, Even spoke up.   
"I always loved truth or dare."   
There was a brief, divided silence until Mahdi said, "Maybe if we add a third option, make it a drinking game? Like you can either do your truth or dare, or, if you don't like it, you have to take a shot."   
Even, Isak and Sana looked at him, making the boy add, "Sorry, or for you guys... I don't know, you have to kiss somebody instead."   
"I can live with that," Even laughed. Sana rolled her eyes.   
"Chris," she said, "prepare yourself." Chris looked up with wide eyes, earning an incredulous look from Sana, who said, "What? They're all in relationships," she gestured to Eva, Vilde, Isak, Even, Magnus, and Noora, "and I can't kiss the boys without it being uncomfortable."   
Chris shook her head. "Um... Kasper?"  
"Please, he hardly counts. It's just the least weird."   
Settling back against the wall, Chris put up her hands. "Whatever," she said in English. "Don't worry, I won't tell Kasper about our affair."   
"Guys!" Vilde cut in excitedly, leaning back on her knees. "Who wants to go first?"   
There was a brief silence until Noora sighed. "Fine," she said, "Isak, truth or dare?"  
"Huh? Me?" Isak said. Noora made a "yes, you, you idiot," face in his direction.   
"Um.." the blond boy trailed, "truth, I guess."  
"Okay," Noora hummed, thinking for a moment. And then she perked up, exclaiming, "Oh! How many people in this room have been in the house while you and Even had sex?"  
Blushing and groaning, Isak buried his head in his knees. "The fuck?" he sighed. They all waited patiently until he peaked over his folded arms and looked around. Even was smiling like a madman as Isak said, "Um.... all of you?"   
Everyone erupted into protests and questions and laughter, Even's deep chuckle booming over it all as he pulled an embarrassed, flushed Isak into his side.   
"What? When? How did we not know?" Magnus was asking, looking around in shock.   
"Okay, okay, next question," Isak insisted, hiding his face in Even's ribcage. "Jonas!" he shouted over the uproar, making everyone settle down. "Truth or dare?"  
"Truth," the dark haired boy replied immediately. Isak thought for a moment.  
"I don't fucking know what to ask," he sighed after a moment.  
Suddenly, Magnus lit up. "Oh! I got one! Jonas, why did you start going down on girls?"  
They all stared at him. "Umm... because they like it?" Jonas asked.   
Rolling his eyes, Magnus said, "Ja, but nobody else was doing it. What were you, like, thinking the first time?"  
There was a beat before Jonas poured himself a shot of vodka and downed it, making everyone smile or laugh. "Chris," he said after swallowing, "truth or dare?"  
Chris looked at him in surprise; she hasn't expected Jonas to pick her. "Truth," she said after a moment.   
"Is everybody just gonna pick truth?" Mahdi laughed.  
"Probably," shrugged Magnus.  
"Okay, okay," Jonas said, regaining the attention. "Chris, why did you always eye-fuck Isak in first year?"   
Chris and Isak made eye contact and they both blushed. "Umm..." the girl trailed, "I thought we maybe had some vibes."  
"You thought there was," Vilde began, and then all the girls were chorusing in English, "electric chemistry!!"  
The boys looked around in confusion as the girls giggled. Red, Chris said, "Okay, okay, Eva. Truth or dare."  
"Um... fuck it, dare."  
"Ooh okay... I dare you to go spend seven minutes in heaven with Vilde."   
Vilde's eyes exploded into saucers but Eva only laughed. "My pleasure," she said, standing and holding out her hand. Vilde followed tentatively and they closed themselves in the nearest closet to a round of wolf-whistles and cheers.   
"Wait, Eva, who do you pick?" Chris shouted as the knob stopped turning.   
"Ummm, Mahdi!" Eva shouted back through the door.   
"Okay," Chris said, "Mahdi, truth or dare."   
"Dare."   
Looking around at the others for ideas, Chris shrugged.   
"Do your best impersonation of Evak," Sana said slyly, giving Isak a cheeky grin. The blond boy groaned.  
"Why is everyone picking on me?" he whined, but Mahdi was smiling.   
"Okay," he said, "Jonas, get up."  
Grinning, Jonas did as he was told. "Okay, you're Isak," Mahdi informed him, before dramatically throwing one arm around his shoulder.   
"Baby, do you know what time it is?" he asked, voice deep and serious. Jonas stared up at him with adoring puppy eyes that most definitely did not look at all like Isak.  
"No, babe, what time is it?" he asked.   
"It's... 21:21," Mahdi replied, turning and caressing Jonas's cheek. He pressed his forehead to the dark haired boy's. "How many universes do you think this is happening in, baby?"   
"Oh, all of them, Evi," Jonas sighed.   
Mahdi slowly pressed his nose to Jonas's and rubbed it back and forth. "That's right, Issy. All of the universes. Let's just take it minute by minute for infinite time."  
"Anything for you."   
The two had been rubbing noses methodically and staring into each other's eyes for a solid thirty seconds by this point. Everyone was giggling and biting on their smiles. Isak was hiding his face in Even's collar.   
"Thank you!" Mahdi said, taking a miniature bow as they burst into applause. Even clapped the hardest.   
"Okay," Mahdi continued, "Mags, truth or dare?"  
"Truth!"  
"Okayyyy... have you ever tried anal?"  
Magnus let out an involuntary yelp and turned red. He quickly poured himself a shot and drank.   
"I can't even guess if that means he has or he hasn't!" Jonas laughed.   
"Okay, whatever," grumbled Magnus. "Even?"  
"Truth."  
"What really gets Isak going?"  
At this, Isak threw up his hands in defeat. "I give up!" he declared. Even chuckled but gave him a serious look, too, silently asking if it was okay to answer.   
Rolling his eyes to keep the grumpy facade, Isak nodded.  
"Okay..." Even said, cracking his knuckles. "Where do I even begin? Well for one thing, he's definitely sub-"  
"Sub?" asked Chris.  
"Submissive. He likes it rough... oh, he loves when I make him beg- he likes getting marked up, loves when I talk dirty. Don't even get me started on the spanking and the choking-"  
"Okay!!" Isak intervened, putting both his hands over Even's mouth. The older boy grinned into this. Everyone else was scrunching their noses or hiding their faces, laughing and blushing. Magnus looked around in confusion. "Is he serious? Choking?"  
"Enough!" Isak said, removing his hands to move across the circle and sit away from Even. The taller boy laughed at his pouty boyfriend.   
Finally, Eva and Vilde came back. They earned quite a few cheers, walking out of the closet. Eva was flushed and smiley while Vilde looked glowing and dazed.   
"What did we miss?" asked Eva, plopping back down.  
"A lot," Chris said, shaking her head. "It's Even's turn."   
"Hmm, Sana. Truth or dare," Even said.   
"Truth," Sana replied.   
"Okay... what's the furthest you've ever gone to get back at somebody?"  
All the girls started to giggle and give her knowing glances, but Sana only pursed her lips, wrinkled her nose, bent down and placed a quick peck on Chris's lips. The brown haired girl smiled. "Ah, young love," she joked.   
"Vilde," Sana said, calling the blonde's attention away from Eva. "Truth or dare."  
"Oh, ummm... dare," Vilde chose, surprising them. She was secretly hoping to end up back in the closet with Eva.  
"Okay. I dare you to... play the rest of the game pantless." Sana gave a wicked grin. She knew Vilde would just drink if she was too uncomfortable with this. The blonde blushed before standing a taking off her jean shorts, revealing a pair of turquoise underwear. She sat back down and scooted a little behind Eva, who gave her a reassuring smile.  
"Okay, Noora," Vilde continued. "Truth or dare."  
"Truth."  
Vilde thought for a bit. "How many times did you and William have sex when you lived together?" she finally asked.   
Noora rolled her eyes. "I don't know," she said, "twice or three times a week? Not a crazy amount. Unlike others." She shot a glare at Isak and Even.   
"Okay, Chris," Noora moved on after earning a scoff from Isak. "Truth or dare?"  
"Hmm, dare?" Chris replied tentatively. Noora smiled.   
"Alright. Let me think..."   
"I dare you to call Kasper and tell him you want to have phone sex," Vilde exclaimed excitedly. Eva looked at her with raised eyebrows and a smile.   
"What?!" Chris asked, looking horrified. But then a daring, smug smile came over her face and she said, "Okay."   
She took out her phone and called Kasper, placing it in the middle of the circle on speaker. Everyone waited.  
"Halla, sugar," they heard from the other end, and, immediately, everyone was trying not to laugh.  
"Hei, Kasper!" Chris said. "I'm just here at home and I miss you, so I was wondering if you'd like to... talk?"  
"Talk? Sure, um, what did you do today?"  
"No I mean... talk. Like, dirty?"  
There was silence. Vilde had her mouth covered with her hands, Noora was squeezing shut her eyes.   
"Umm... like, you want to have.... phone sex?" Kasper asked. His voice was quite confused.  
"Yes!" Chris said. "Um, yeah! Totally!"  
"..... okay? What do you want to talk ... about?"  
"I don't know, um, you start," Chris said. Everyone was staring at her with too-big grins.   
"Okay... what are you wearing right now?"  
"Erm... just my underwear," Chris lied, earning a surprised laugh from Eva. They all gave her wide-eyed glares.   
"Oh. Oh. Um... are you, like, touching yourself?"  
"Okay! Kasper! Somebody just got home, gotta go!" Chris cut in, beat red. "Bye, talk to you soon!"   
She hung up to an eruption of laughter. "Fuck, he's gonna be so confused," she said, pushing her hair behind her ears. Everyone was still giggly when she said, "Okay... Isak."  
"Truth," Isak replied, tearing his eyes away from Even, who'd been eating him alive with his stare for the last couple minutes.   
"Okay... what's the most embarrassing thing your mom's ever done?"   
Chris asked it in a casual, "moms-are-so-annoying" way, but all the boys, plus Noora and Eva, got quiet.   
"Um..." Isak trailed, before crawling across the circle to place a light kiss on Even's waiting mouth.   
"Okay, that's too easy," Magnus complained. "We all have to drink or kiss a friend, they just have to kiss each other."  
"Ja, how about when one of you wants to skip something you have to... take off a piece of clothes," Jonas suggested.   
Rolling his eyes, Isak took off his shirt and settled back between Noora and Mahdi.   
"Damn, you weren't kidding when you said he liked to be marked up!" exclaimed Magnus.  
Isak looked down and blushed at the sight of his very, very bruised torso. It would have been bad enough if you couldn't see exactly which marks had been made by hand, mouth, teeth or nails.   
"Ja, whatever," Isak mumbled. "Mahdi, truth or dare?"   
"Eh, truth."  
"Okay.... who in this room would you date first?" Isak asked, drawing his knees to his chest in an attempt to cover up.  
Mahdi looked around, deliberating. "Um... Sana," he said after a moment. Everyone stared at him. Sana actually had a little blush spreading across her cheeks.  
"It's just because I'm the only single girl," she mumbled. Mahdi raised his eyebrows.   
"I didn't say that."   
Everyone stared between them. "You're smart," Mahdi replied. "Intellectual. Interesting. Badass. Pretty. Why wouldn't I want to date you?"  
Blinking, Sana looked away. "That's all true," she admitted. Nodding, Mahdi swiveled his head around the rest of the group.  
"Okay, Jonas, truth or dare?"   
"Dare, I guess," Jonas replied.   
"Okay... I dare you to... call Eskild."  
"Why?" Jonas asked in confusion.   
"I dunno... ask who his favorite roommate is."  
Noora and Isak glanced at each other. "I'm not expecting anything," Isak said as Jonas dialed Eskild's number.   
"Jonas?"  
"Hey, Eskild, I was just calling with a question," Jonas said. He put the phone down on speaker.   
"Okay, what's up?"  
"Who's your favorite roommate?"  
There was quiet. "Linn," he said after a moment. "Hi, everyone else listening. I hope you're enjoying your party!" Eskild continued before hanging up. Everyone chuckled.   
“Okay, Even,” Jonas said. Even cocked his head at him. “Truth or dare?”  
“Dare.”  
“Okay. I dare you to… add to your collection.”  
They all looked at Jonas’s grin in confusion.   
“My what?” Even asked.   
“Go into the closet with Isak,” he said, pointing to the closet Eva and Vilde had just come out of, “and give him as many hickey’s as you can in… five minutes.”  
Isak stared at Jonas. “Bro?!” he asked, betrayal lacing his voice. Jonas smiled and shrugged.   
“Alright, baby,” Even said, standing and nodding towards the closet. Letting out a huff, Isak scrambled up and followed him.   
“I chose Magnus,” Even said before shutting the door, trapping him and Isak in the dark. “Halla,” the older boy said, voice low. Isak shivered when he felt Even’s lips press to his neck.   
“Stopp,” Isak whined, “I’m mad at you!”  
“Huh!” laughed Even. “For what?”  
“Choking?? Spanking?! Was that necessary?”  
“You said I could tell them!”  
“I didn’t think you’d go into so much detail, Even!”  
Isak could barely make out Even’s form in the darkness but he could feel the tension between them.   
“You don’t like them knowing what I do to you?” Even breathed, tickling his neck. He grabbed Isak by the ass, pulled them tight to each other. “How I punish you, baby?”  
“Nei,” replied Isak. “That’s just for us.”  
“I’m sorry, sweetie,” Even said, sucking on his jaw. Isak let out a stuttered gasp at the feeling of Even’s tongue, Even’s teeth. “I just can’t help myself around you.” He moved his neck so that he was now marking Isak’s collarbone. The smaller boy let out an involuntary moan as Even grinded his hips into him. “Want you so bad all the time.”  
“They’re right out there,” Isak reprimanded as Even eased one leg between his.   
“They don’t care, baby, this was the dare.”  
“But- fuck, Evenn,” Isak sighed as the older boy ducked down and started sucking on his nipple.   
“Hmm, you like that,” Even asked, pulling away.   
Isak pushed his head back down, begging, “Don’t stop.”  
Even continued to suck hickeys over Isak’s neck and chest, and then he started heading down, down, down, marking bruises in a line down Isak’s stomach.   
“Nei, we can’t,” Isak said, but he made no move to stop Even as he sucked another mark just below Isak’s bellybutton and started tugging on his waistband.   
“Okay, time’s up!”   
The door opened and flooded them with light. Jonas, Mahdi and Eva stood grinning on the other side as Isak, panicking, shoved Even away by the forehead. The older boy fell back on his butt as Isak pulled his pants up further. Even laughed in shock. The three on standing outside were trying not to laugh, too, as well as everyone watching them from a couple feet away.   
“Jesus,” Mahdi said in English, “that escalated.”  
“Nobody barged in on Eva and Vilde!” Isak said, voice high-pitched.   
“They came out on time!” Jonas shot back. Isak put both hands on his forehead.   
“Okayyyy, so that was something,” Eva said, turning and walking away.   
“You get used to it,” Noora added. Even got up and pulled Isak into a swooping kiss before dragging him back to the circle and forcing him into his lap.   
“It’s Vilde’s turn,” Chris said. “She chose truth.”  
Noora looked at Vilde amusedly. “Did you ever watch lesbian porn before you were out?”  
Vilde blinked. “What? Nei!! I never- I don’t-”  
Chuckling, Noora shook her head. “Okay, okay, don’t have a heart attack.”  
“Do people watch gay porn before they’re out?” Magnus asked. Eva and Noora gave Isak knowing glances, and he stared back at them in confusion.   
“What?”  
“Well… do you remember when you loaned me your phone at the tree lighting in first year?” asked Noora.   
“Nei?”  
“Well, you did. And you kind of had like… ten tabs of gay porn open.”  
Isak burst into a blush. Eva tried not to laugh.  
“Oh, maybe we could watch it together some time!” Even joked.   
Isak was beyond done.


	24. Chapter twenty-four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone hits the hay at Eva's, and another game is played the next morning:)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Full disclosure, I had to google "drawing stick chock" because I forgot how to spell chalk. I'm a mess, send help. Also, if you've never played newlyweds, it's really fun.

Chapter 24  
"Okay, where is everyone gonna sleep?" Eva asked. It was later, now, and, since the party was a sleepover, everyone was ready to crash. "There's my room, the guest room, the couches, and the floor."  
"Guest room!" Magnus exclaimed, waving his hand in the air.   
Mahdi looped one arm around his shoulders. "Guess we're roommates, bro!"   
"Make it a trio," Jonas added.   
"Okay, Vilde, you can sleep in my bed with me, and then there's room for one more," Eva announced.   
"Dibs," said Noora. Eva smiled at her.   
"So Sana and Chris can have the couches," the auburn haired girl continued, "and Even and Isak get the floor."  
"What? Why do we get the floor?" Isak protested. Eva rolled her eyes.  
"Because Sana and Chris are my first priority?"   
With a huff, Isak crossed his arms.  
Soon, Mahdi, Magnus and Jonas were piled in bed together, legs overlapping, elbows hitting chest. Noora, Eva and Vilde were curled up in a huddle, smiling and whispering. Sana and Chris were out on the living room couches, gossiping, and Isak and Even were on a mattress on the floor of the den, lazily making out.  
"This is fun," Even said into Isak's mouth. He curled his fingers through Isak's hair, pulling the younger boy closer by the small of his back.  
"I'm glad you think so," Isak replied. "You're not the one getting picked on."   
Chuckling, Even pressed a kiss to Isak's forehead.   
"Are you really mad, baby?" he asked, nuzzling his face into Isak's shoulder. The younger boy rolled his eyes.   
"Nei, but you better not ever tell anyone what I like in bed ever again."   
"Promise," Even sighed, planting a soft kiss to Isak's jaw.   
Isak smiled and found Even's mouth again.   
It was warm and soft and cozy and secluded, on that mattress. Eva's den felt homey and Isak felt at home. He yelped as Even brought his cold feet under the blanket and pressed them to his shins. "Fuck you," he sighed, but he was doey eyed and smiling and gooey for Even.  
At some point in the night, Isak jolted awake to the sound of a crash, followed by a loud groan.   
Standing carefully, to avoid waking Even, he slipped out of the room. He caught Eva leaving her room, as well.   
"What was that?" he asked.   
"Dunno," she yawned back, "came from the guest room."  
They padded down the hallway and knocked on the door to the room where the three boys were supposed to be asleep.  
"Everyone okay?" Eva asked, cracking open the door and peeking inside. Isak smiled at what he saw. Mahdi was covering his whole face with his hands, quaking with silent laughter. Jonas was grinning and shushing him and trying not to laugh, too.   
Magnus was on the floor, rubbing the back of his head.   
"We're good," Jonas assured her. "Mags just had an accident."  
"It's not my fault you two were hogging the whole bed! I was innocently trying to roll over and next thing I know, I'm on the fucking floor."  
"Ah, fuck, man," Mahdi wheezed. "Stop, I'm gonna piss my pants."  
Isak laughed. "Fuck, guys, I leave you alone for five minutes," he whispered.   
"Yeah, it's sooo funny that I fell and hit my head," Magnus said irritably.   
Mahdi, with actual tears of laughter running down his face, managed to get out, "I'm sorry, bro. I'll move to the floor if you want."  
Scoffing, Magnus stood up. "It's fine, whatever," he said, wiggling back into the bed. "Just don't push me out again!"  
"If everyone's good, I'm gonna go back to bed," said Eva. "Goodnight, guys."  
"Night, Eva," they all said. Isak gave a little wave before heading back towards the den.  
As soon as he got there, he saw a sleepy Even looking around. “Halla, baby,” he sighed, settling back down into the blankets. He pressed a warm kiss to Even’s mouth and they both fell backwards with it, landing softly on the pillows.  
“Halla,” Even whispered back, gently running his thumb over Isak’s cheek. “Where’d you go?”  
“Magnus fell off the bed,” Isak giggled. Smiling, Even raised his eyebrows.   
“Yeah? And you rushed to check on him?”  
“I heard a crash,” Isak said. “I thought I should make sure everyone was okay.”  
“You’re so nice,” Even signed, a dopey grin spreading over his face. Isak wiggled his eyebrows.   
“That’s true,” he replied. Chuckling, Even leaned in and kissed Isak, letting his mouth linger on the younger boy’s. He gently licked at Isak’s lower lip, and the Isak opened his mouth.   
“Mmm,” Even moaned into Isak’s mouth, pulling his boyfriend closer by the back of his head.   
“Evenn,” Isak warned, breaking up their kiss. “What do you think you’re doing?”  
“What does it feel like?” Even asked in response, propping himself up on one elbow to hover over Isak and going in for a second kiss.   
“We can’t, everyone’s here,” Isak protested.   
“From the looks of things, we’re alone.”   
“But- we can’t just-”  
“Issy, don’t pretend like we haven’t before,” Even laughed. And then he saw the worried look on Isak’s face and smiled warmly. “We don’t have to do anything you don’t wanna do,” he assured him with a soft kiss to the cheek.  
Sighing, Isak huffed, “Well I want to! I want you to fucking finish what you started in that closet, but- what if somebody hears?”  
“Then they hear,” Even said. “But if you’re worried then-”  
Isak cut him off with his mouth. Even smiled into the kiss.   
“Mmm, you taste so good, baby,” the older boy said, lifting Isak up slightly by the small of his back.   
Isak let a needy sound spill from his mouth but Even just ate it right up.  
“Be fast, Ev,” Isak said softly. Grinning, Even pulled Isak’s shirt over his head.   
Shivering, Isak watched as Even trailed gentle kisses down his torso, always maintaining eye contact. 

The next morning, a knock on the den door went unheard by the two boys. Isak was still shirtless, although he’d had the sense to pull his boxers back on, and curled deeply into Even’s side, who had one arm tucked around him. The others cracked open the door when they didn’t get a response.   
Filing in, they all gathered around the boys, who were half under the covers and looked beyond adorable. “Oh my god, it’s so weird seeing him like this,” whispered Eva.   
“Like what? A fucking puppy?” asked Mahdi.  
“He’s so… soft,” breathed Vilde. They were all staring at Isak.   
“It’s refreshing,” admitted Sana.   
“Stop watching me while I sleep, you pervs,” Isak mumbled, making them all jump, as he burrowed further into Even.   
“Sorry,” Eva said at a normal volume. “But it’s time to get up. We’ve made breakfast and we’re gonna play newlyweds.”  
“What?” Isak asked, blinking open his eyes to look at them. Even started to stir.   
“You know that American gameshow where newlyweds go on to see how well they know each other? We’re gonna play,” Eva explained. Isak stared at her incomprehensibly, earning an eyeroll. “Just come on, it’ll be fun.”  
“Halla, baby,” Even said suddenly, voice gravely. He leaned in to press a kiss to Isak’s cheek.   
“Halla,” Isak said back, a tender smile breaking over his face. And then he glared at the rest of the squad, saying, “We’ve got company.”   
“Oh,” Even said, squinting up at them. “Hi.”  
“Hi, Even. Get up. We’re gonna play a game.”  
Still looking mildly confused, Even stood up, leaving a grumpy Isak burritoed in the blankets.   
“Come on, it’ll be fun,” the older boy urged, holding out one hand. Isak said something incomprehensible into the pillows.  
“Isak, breakfast is getting cold,” Vilde said, glancing towards the kitchen nervously.   
“Fine, fine, just let me get on a shirt,” snapped Isak, pushing the covers away. He grabbed his shirt from where he’d tossed it last night and pulled it over his head before padding behind the others.   
In the kitchen, there were pancakes, fruit, toast, and a bunch of drinks. Everyone started taking food. Isak grabbed an apple. He sat down next to Magnus, who was digging into his plate of pancakes. After a second, Even placed a plate with a piece of toast and jam on his lap. “If you want it,” he said, gently fixing the younger boy’s hair.   
“Ready to play newlyweds?” asked Eva once everyone was situated.   
“How do you play exactly?” Jonas asked, squinting.   
"Okay, so, everyone's names are in this bag," Eva said, shaking a ziplock full of small, white slips of paper. "Well each pick until everyone is chosen, and then I’ll explain. I'll go first."   
She reached into the bag and pulled out a piece of paper. Unfolding it, her face lit up. "Chris!" she exclaimed, turning and giving her friend a highfive.   
"We're gonna kick everyone's asses!" Chris said happily. Eva then passed the bag to Vilde, who took it and reached in cautiously.   
"Oh... Even!" she said, looking across the room at the tall boy. Even smiled at her.   
"I can't believe we're married, it all happened so fast," he said warmly, taking in how nervous Vilde looked. She smiled.  
"My turn!" announced Magnus, grabbing it from Vilde. "Okay...." he said, fishing around for the perfect piece. As soon as he opened his paper, he let out a yelp of excitement. "Isak! Yeah, bro!"  
Isak rolled his eyes. "Anyone wanna switch?" he asked.  
Faltering, Magnus asked, "What? You don't wanna be my partner? I thought we'd be really good together!"  
Smiling fondly at his oblivious friend, Isak slung one arm around Magnus's shoulder. "Kidding, dude, we're gonna kill it," he assured him.   
"Here, Jonas," Magnus said, grinning. Jonas took the bag and drew a name.   
"Noora," he said, looking at the blonde. She gave a half-hearted smile.  
"Okay, so Sana and Mahdi," Eva said.   
"Ooh, the lovebirds," teased Chris.   
Rolling her eyes, Sana rested back on the couch.   
"Everyone move away from their partner," Eva continued, "and then I'll ask a question about you, and everyone writes their answer. Then your partner guesses what your answer is, and, if they get it right, your team gets a point. Sound good?" Through this speech, she handed each of them a piece of paper and a pencil. Everyone nodded. "Okay. So, first question..." Eva scanned her phone. "What is your favorite animal?"  
Everyone wrote down their answer quietly. And then Eva sat up straight.   
"Okay, ready?" she asked. The group nodded. "Chris?"  
"Okay, Eva's favorite animal is birds," Chris said confidently. Smiling, Eva nodded.  
"And yours are platypuses," she said. Grinning, Chris put up her hand for another highfive.   
"Two points!" she cheered.   
Moving counterclockwise, they got to Vilde. "Even, you like... puppies?" she said nervously. Even smiled and help up his paper, which did, indeed, say puppies.   
"How did you know?" he asked.  
Shrugging, Vilde tried to hide her grin.   
"And Vilde, you love cats."  
The blonde nodded, tongue between teeth.   
It came to Mahdi. "Sana, your favorite animal is a wolf?" he asked. Laughing, Sana shook her head.   
"Nei, I like bats," she said. Everyone rolled their eyes.   
"Of course you do," said Isak, earning a glare.   
"And Mahdi, do you like dogs?" she asked.   
Smiling, Mahdi nodded.   
"Okay, Noora," said Jonas, "you like... horses?"  
Eyes wide, Noora said, "Nei?? You think I'm a horse girl??"  
"I don't know, don't girls like horses?" Jonas asked, furrowing his eyebrows.   
"'Girls'? Girls aren't all the same person, Jonas."  
Putting up his hands in surrender, Jonas said in English, "Sorry, sorry."  
Pursing her lips, Noora continued, "You like tigers."  
"What- how did you-"  
"Isak."  
Jonas looked to Isak with raised eyebrows. The blond boy shrugged. "I don't remember mentioning it but I guess I did," he said.   
"Okay, our turn!" Magnus said excitedly. "Isak, you like rabbits!" Everyone turned to stare at Isak, who blushed. He nodded once.   
"Rabbits?? Isak, your favorite animal is a bunny?" Eva asked incredulously.   
"A rabbit, not a bunny, and it's just because I had one when I was little!" he weakly defended. Even was grinning ear to ear. "Anyway, Mags likes cats."  
Magnus smiled. "We're crushing it," he affirmed.   
“Next round!” announced Eva. “What is your favorite color?”  
Everyone quickly wrote down their answers. “Okay, ready?” asked Eva. After receiving several nods, she said, “Okay, Chris, your favorite color is purple.”  
“Yes!” Chris said, grinning. “And you like maroonish-red.”  
Laughing, Eva nodded.   
It went to Vilde. “Even, do you like green?” she asked.   
“Ja!” Even said, eyebrows shooting up as he held up his paper. “You’re good at this, Vilde. And you like pink.”  
The blonde girl nodded.   
They all turned to Sana, who looked at Mahdi. “Your favorite color is also green?”  
“Red,” Mahdi corrected. “And you like black?”  
“Yes. That one was easy.”  
Magnus smiled excitedly. “Isak likes blue!” he announced, earning a glare from Jonas.   
“Uh, dude? You skipped us?”  
“Oh, sorry, sorry,” Magnus retracted.   
Jonas looked to Noora, who sighed and said, “You like… blue?”  
“Nah, yellow. Do you like red?”  
“I like white,” Noora said quietly. They all stared at her. “What? It’s clean.”  
“Okay, anyyywaayyy,” Magnus drawled, “Isak likes blue.”   
“Yes, and so do you. Navy blue, specifically,” Isak replied, smiling at his obviously deep knowledge of his friend.   
“Okay, so so far me and Chris, Vilde and Even, and Isak and Magnus each have four points. Jonas and Noora have one and Sana and Mahdi have two. The questions are gonna start getting harder,” Eva said. “The next one is… have you ever dyed your hair?”  
Everyone started writing. When they were all ready, Eva said, “Okay, Chris definitely has.”   
“Um, nei?”  
“What do you mean, ‘nei’?” the auburn haired girl replied incredulously. “I’ve seen pictures of you with blue and purple in your hair and stuff!”  
“That was chalk, Eva, I’ve never actually dyed it,” Chris replied.   
Eva stared at her. “Oh,” she said after a moment. “Fuck.”  
“Yeah, fuck! We just lost the lead!” Chris replied.   
“I’m sorry! It’s not my fault you chalk your hair!”   
“Ughh. I know you haven’t dyed yours.”  
“That’s true. At least we got one point.”  
Chris shook her head. “Just go, Vilde. Take the win,” she sighed dramatically.   
Vilde looked at Even cautiously. “I feel like you have,” she said. Even’s face lit up.   
“Have we known each other for years?!” he asked. Isak’s eyes got wide.   
“You dyed your hair?!” he asked. Even laughed.   
“Yeah, in first year, on a whim. Dyed it green.”  
Blinking, Isak shook his head. Jonas chuckled.   
“You can’t imagine him not looking as perfect as he does now?” he asked.   
Rolling his eyes, Isak replied, “Neiii, it’s just… weird.”  
Even smiled fondly at him. “Don’t worry, baby, I won’t dye it anytime soon. Anyway, Vilde, you have not dyed your hair.”  
Giggling, Vilde shook her head.   
“Okay, Sana, you haven’t, either,” Mahdi said. Sana rolled her eyes.   
“Nei, I haven’t,” she said. “Neither have you.”  
“Nope.”   
It got to Jonas and Noora. “You… haven’t?” he asked skeptically. Noora sighed.   
“I have. During first year. I dyed it to be more yellow than white but it didn’t really look that different.”  
“Ah,” Jonas said.   
“And you haven’t?” Noora asked.  
“Nei.”  
Finally, it was Magnus and Isak’s turn. “Okay, Isak, you have not dyed your hair,” Magnus said with confidence. Isak nodded.   
“Neither have you.”  
“Woot-woot! Still in first!” Magnus cheered, giving Isak a fist pump.   
“Ehem, tied for first,” corrected Even. Isak rolled his eyes at him.  
“Okay, next… what is your partner’s favorite thing to do? Like, hobbies and activities. And Even, I swear if you say ‘be with Isak’ or ‘kiss Isak,’ I will kick you out.”  
Laughing, Even put up his hands. Isak blushed, but he was smiling.   
After everyone had written an answer, Eva looked to Chris. “You like partying.”  
“Yes! And so do you!”   
The two girls highfived again. “Back on the same page,” declared Chris.   
It went to Vilde, who smiled shyly as Even. “I know you like to draw,” she said. Even grinned.   
“Right. And you like to bake?”  
Lighting up, Vilde inched forward a little. “Yes!”   
“Okay, what the fuck. You two hardly know each other,” Mahdi complained. Even looked at him in confusion.   
“Vilde and I are friends,” he said.   
“Ja,” Vilde added. “Even was the only person in the entire criteria who took my kosegroup announcement seriously at the beginning of the year. And he… helped me be more comfortable after I… came out.” Her sentence had gotten progressively quieter. She stared at her lap.   
“Seriously?” asked Isak. Vilde nodded.   
“That’s really cool,” Noora commented. Eva put one hand on Vilde’s back.   
“Yeah,” added Sana. “Anyway, Mahdi, do you like to skate?”  
“Not really,” shrugged Mahdi. “I like reading.”  
“Ah. I knew Jonas skates, so I thought…”  
“Yeah. You like to read, too? I don’t know.”  
“That actually is what I said,” agreed Sana.   
The round got to Jonas. “You like to cook, right?” he asked Noora, who smiled and nodded.   
“And you like to skate.”  
“Ja,” he replied, also grinning.   
“Isak, you like to rap,” Magnus said.   
Rolling his eyes, Isak said, “Yes. And it’s sad that you knew that. I couldn’t think of anything better.”  
“It’s not that bad,” shrugged Mags. “Anyway, your turn.”  
“Okay, you like playing ball. Like, going to a park and tossing a ball around and stuff.”  
“Well, technically I wrote ‘informal sports,’ but that works. Next?”  
Eva looked at the list. “Okay, so now me and Chris have seven points. Isak and Magnus and Vilde and Even have eight. Jonas and Noora have four and Mahdi and Sana have five. Wanna play to fourteen?”  
Everyone nodded.   
“Okay, next is… what is your biggest fear? You don’t have to do, like, serious fears… like spiders and the dentist are okay.”  
The group nodded. “Ja, so, Chris is scared of dogs. Big ones,” Eva said after a moment.   
“Huh?” Sana said. “Dogs? Really, Chris?”  
“I got bit when I was little!” Chris defended. Sana pursed her lips. “Anyway,” the brown haired girl continued, “Eva, you’re afraid of ghosts.”  
Eva nodded.   
“You believe in ghosts?” asked Jonas, looking at her with a shocked expression.   
“Um, yeah? You should’ve seen her at the cabin last year,” Chris laughed.   
“Whatever, whatever,” hushed Eva. “It’s Vilde’s turn.”  
“Honestly, Even, I have no idea… I couldn’t think of any little things you’d be scared of… so I said losing Isak?” the blonde said.   
Even smiled warmly. He lifted up his paper, and, very clearly, “Losing Isak” was written. Everyone booed and groaned.  
“Fuck, now I look bad,” Isak sighed. “She said not to do deep fears!”  
Chuckling, Even replied, “I’m not scared of anything less deep than that.”  
“Mmhmm. Don’t break up with me, but that is not what I wrote,” Isak said back. “It is my biggest fear but I did a material fear, as the instructor told us to.”   
“It’s okay,” Even said. Anyone could hear the smile in his voice. “Anyway, Vilde, are you afraid of swimming?” he asked.   
Vilde looked at him with wide eyes. “How did you…”   
“Eva mentioned once a trip you all took to the lake and how you wouldn’t get in the water,” Even explained. Vilde blinked.   
“Okay, Mahdi,” Sana cut in. “I have no idea. I said spiders.”  
Laughing, Mahdi shook his head. “I’m claustrophobic,” he admitted.   
“Ah,” sighed Sana.   
“I… also said spiders,” Mahdi admitted. Sana rolled her eyes, smiling.   
“Not me either,” she said. “I’m scared of losing arguments.”  
Everyone let out a laugh at that and then looked to Jonas.   
“Being unorganised,” Jonas guessed for Noora.   
The blonde raised her eyebrows. “True, but not what I wrote. I said flying. I hate flying. And for you I said capitalism.”  
Shooting a look towards Eva, who laughed, Jonas said, “Right.”  
“Okay, Isak, you’re afraid of needles,” Magnus said. Isak, a little flushed, nodded.   
“You’re afraid of needles?” asked Even.   
Crossing his arms, Isak replied, “Well, yeah, but like… I don’t, like, cry when I get shots or anything. I just don’t like them.”  
“Okay,” Even said.   
Isak turned back to Magnus. “You’re scared of heights.”  
Smiling, Magnus nodded.   
“Okay, now… oh, shoot. It’s when did you first tell your partner you love them, since its supposed to be for newlyweds. But, um… just do when you would usually tell a partner you love them. Or, if you’re dating somebody, when you told them you love them”  
Everybody considered this and slowly wrote an answer. “Okay, Chris… six months?” Eva asked tentatively.   
“Five and a half, actually. But close enough,” Chris said.   
“Uh, nei! Not close enough!” protested Sana. “She got it wrong!”  
“Okay, then if you get half a month off, it won’t count either!” countered Eva. Sana closed her mouth. “That’s what I thought.”  
“Anyway, Eva, you haven’t said it yet,” Chris said. Eva nodded.   
“No fair, now Even knows,” complained Magnus. Everyone rolled their eyes at him.   
“Well, it’s true,” Even admitted. “Vilde, you haven’t, either.”  
Vilde nodded. “And you did a week before Christmas, so like two months after your first kiss.”  
The whole group stared at her, shocked. Even was also confused. “How did you know that?” he asked.   
Grinning, Isak gave a little wave. “Me and Vilde are also friends,” he said.   
“Whatever. Sana, you wouldn’t say it for at least six months,” Mahdi said.   
Smiling, Sana nodded. “Exactly,” she said. “And you… you would say it when you felt it.”  
Blinking in surprise, Mahdi nodded, too.   
Sana shrugged at his look. “That just seemed like you.”  
“Okay, Noora, you haven’t said it to William yet this time,” Jonas offered. Noora nodded.   
“And you… five months?”  
“I said four,” Jonas replied. Noora shrugged.   
“Isak said it two months in, too! But a little after Even. Well, Even texted it. Isak said it first. Then Even said it back,” Magnus exclaimed proudly. Everyone turned to him. “We had a whole talk about when is too soon,” the blond boy explained.   
“Ja, which is why I know you said it one month in,” Isak said. The gang chuckled. Surprise, surprise.  
“Okay, if Vilde and Even or Magnus and Isak get both next round, they win,” Eva said. “And the question is… what is a weird ritual you have?”  
Everyone stared blankly at her. “Ritual?” asked Noora.   
“Yeah, like… if you draw a fake mustache on your face every Saturday or something.”  
“Okay. I think we’re out, Jonas.”  
“Agreed.”  
Sana looked to Mahdi. “Want to give it a go?”  
The boy laughed. “I have no fucking idea what I’d write, so not really.”  
“Me neither,” admitted Sana.   
“Okay, just us three,” Eva said. “For this one, how about we just guess a ritual, and if they do it then you get the point. You don’t need to guess the one they’re thinking of. Chris, you… brush your teeth before and after eating breakfast.”  
“I do,” Chris affirmed. “And you… fuck, I don’t know. Don’t you wash your hair everyday?”  
“Nei?” laughed Eva.   
“That’s me,” Noora butted in. Chris shrugged.   
“Okay, our turn,” Even said. “Vilde, you paint your nails a new color every weekend.”  
Vilde brightened. “You noticed?”  
“Ja.”  
Smiling, the blonde said, “And you watch a new movie every Sunday.”  
Even grinned at her and then at Isak. “If it weren’t for me,” the younger boy said, “you two would be losing.”  
“Okay, okay, Isak. You let your hair get really long, like in your eyes long, and then you cut it really really short, instead of just getting normal haircuts,” Magnus said excitedly. Isak nodded. He missed the horrified look that flashed over Even’s face.   
“And you read a book, like, five times in a row. Because you’re always confused by the end.”  
“True!” Magnus exclaimed. “Okay, so who won?”  
Eva shrugged. “You tied,” she said.   
“But- we can’t tie,” the boy argued. This debate went on until the group just started ignoring Magnus’s protests and went to watch a movie. 

Later, that afternoon, Isak and Even were walking home. Even had Isak’s hand tight.   
They both had a lot of questions from the game… one thing was for sure, there was no way Isak was cutting off all his hair.


	25. Chapter twenty-five

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ekild brings a boy home, Even is a tease, smut ensues...

Chapter 25  
Isak sat in bed, holding a bowl of cereal and watching a TV show on his laptop.   
“Hi,” Even said, leaning against the doorframe.   
Isak smiled at him. He swallowed and then replied, “Halla, baby.”  
Walking over, Even pressed a hard kiss to Isak’s mouth. He pulled away and wrinkled his nose. “What is that?” he asked, gesturing to the bowl.  
“Lucky Charms,” Isak said in english, making Even shake his head.   
“Ugh, do you know how much processed sugar is in that?” he asked, but then he reconsidered his words when Isak’s smile faltered. “I’ve always hated the taste, but my mom loves it,” he added. “I guess only fun people like it.”  
Isak rolled his eyes. “Well, I am the most fun,” he said, adjusting his snapback. He was wearing the white one today.  
“What are your plans for the afternoon?” Even asked.   
“Eskild wants us to go on a triple date with him,” Isak sighed dramatically.   
“What?” Even replied, raising his eyebrows.   
“He’s bringing some guy home and Noora and William are going to make dinner and they’re all gonna eat together, and Eskild wants us to join.”  
“That sounds nice,” Even said. Isak groaned.   
“I don’t wanna meet the guy Eskild’s fucking,” he mumbled.   
“If he’s bringing him home, it must be serious, right?” asked Even. Isak shrugged. “Well, I think it’ll be fun. Besides, I’ve never gotten to properly meet William since he came home this summer.”  
“I’m sure you’ll have a great time,” Isak said. Even laughed.   
“And so will you,” he assured. 

A few hours later, Isak changed out of his hoodie and sweatpants into his black skinny jeans and a navy blue button down. Everything was tight in just the way Even loved and so he couldn’t help but dip low by Isak’s ear and whisper, “Can’t wait to rip those jeans off you later tonight?”  
Isak gave him a narrow-eyed glare as he styled his hair. That reminded Even to ask about the party. “Oh, and what the hell was all that about you chopping off your hair?”   
“Hmm?” Isak replied.   
“At Eva’s. Magnus said you let your hair grow really long and then chop it all off.”  
“Oh, yeah. I dunno. I never had, like, regularly scheduled haircuts as a kid because everything was so hectic, so I just would just let it grow and then, when it got way too long, my mom would cut it all super short. And then, when I moved here, I never broke the habit.”  
“Do you… do you like it short?” Even asked casually.   
Isak eyed him from the mirror. “Yeah,” he said after a moment. “I was actually thinking of just buzzing it this time. That way I won’t have to deal with it for a while.”  
“Oh,” Even said. “Um, I’m sure that will look nice.”  
Isak stared at him a moment longer before breaking into a laugh. “Fuck, and you say I’m a bad liar.”  
“What?”  
“Even, you would hate that.”  
Even looked at Isak and then dropped his jaw. “Fuck you,” he said. “You’re fucking with me.”  
“Duh,” Isak said. “I know how much you love my hair.”  
Laughing, Even shook his head. “Fuck, you little shit. You terrified me.” He grabbed Isak around the waist and went to kiss the back of his head, but Isak was pushing him away.  
“Oi, oi, oi, I just fixed that hair,” he said. Even wrestled him around and pressed a kiss onto his mouth.  
“Alright, ready to go meet Eskild’s boyfriend?” he asked. Isak rolled his eyes.  
“Not really,” he said, earning a chuckle and another kiss.

“Ah! There are the boys!” Eskild said as they walked out. “Oliver, this is my kind, sweet, supportive son, Even. Even, this is Oliver.” He gestured between the tall blond and an attractive man with tan skin and black hair. They shook hands. “And this is my other, grumpy son, Isak,” Eskild continued.   
Isak balked. “Huh?” he said. “Grumpy? I got dressed up for you! He’s just wearing a sweatshirt.” He gestured to Even.   
Rolling his eyes, Eskild tisked. “Don’t be so dramatic, Isak. See,” he said, turning to Oliver, “this is what I’m talking about.”  
Huffing, Isak adjusted his collar. “Whatever. It’s nice to meet you, although I don’t know how you stand Eskild,” he said, sticking out his hand to shake with Oliver. The man laughed.   
“We get along somehow,” he said. Eskild smiled a big, melty smile.   
Just then, Noora and William walked in from outside. “Everyone’s here!” Eskild said happily, clapping his hands towards Noora. “This is my angel daughter, Noora, and her William.”  
Everyone greeted each other, and Isak chose not to comment on the fact that Even got kind, sweet, and supportive and Noora got a fucking angel but he was grumpy, grumpy of all things! Isak Valtersen was not grumpy! He was the least fucking grumpy person he’d ever met.   
“Even,” Noora said, “will you help me cook? Everyone else would just make it worse.”  
Isak felt his heart speed up as he looked at Even with big, pleading eyes- do not leave me alone with William, Eskild, and a near stranger- but the older boy just smiled and nodded.  
“Isak, sit down,” said Eskild, and the small boy begrudgingly did. He didn’t like being the smallest in the room- why the fuck were the three tallest people in Oslo gathered around him.   
“So, William, Eskild tells me you lived in London?” asked Oliver. Isak, glad not to be a part of the conversation, traced the tablecloth- where the fuck did they even get a tablecloth?- with his fingers.   
Letting out a breath, he looked around, but there was nothing much to look at. William was being very serious. He always seemed like an incrediably serious guy to Isak, too serious to possibly be any fun. But, then again, he’d once caught him pressing little kisses to the tip of Noora’s nose, both of them giggling and smiling, so he figured he wasn’t all terrifying.   
“What about you, Isak?” Oliver was asking. Well, shit.   
“What was that, sorry?” the blond boy asked, clearing his throat. Eskild glared at him.   
“I was just asking William how long he’s been with Noora. How long have you and Even been together?”  
Blinking, Isak tried to do the math. They’d first kissed around Halloween, but then Even called things off a week later. Then two more weeks passed, then they really got together, but then Even had his episode and they took another week-long break… so technically like two weeks before Christmas? But that felt like he was selling them short.   
“Since November,” he finally settled on saying. “So, for like… eight months?”  
“That’s a long time,” Oliver commented. Isak nodded.  
“Isak is my little prodigy,” Eskild said. “He was so in the closet before we met.”  
Narrowing his eyes, Isak glared at Eskild. “Um, I’m right here? And you didn’t help that much.”  
“Oh, please,” Eskild said in English. “I basically guided him out,” he continued to Oliver. “I’m his guru.”  
“Okay, food’s ready!” announced Noora, carrying out dinner with Even helping.  
Once the table was set, they each took a seat next to their boyfriend. Even tucking one hand around Isak’s waist. “Don’t think for a second I’m not pissed you ditched me,” Isak said through his teeth when Even leaned by him to get the pitcher of water.   
“I’ll make it up to you later,” the older boy breathed back. Isak bit his tongue. Of course Even chose tonight to be a goddamn tease.   
The dinner was okay. The food was great and the conversation carried. Even, of course, was perfect and charming and witty and cultured in all the ways Isak wasn’t, but, if that meant the younger boy could mostly sit quietly, he’d take it. At one point, he made eye contact with William, and realized that, in a lot of ways, they were in the same boat. They were both half a pair that didn’t want to be there. They were both the less social, less endearing member of that pair. He gave a small shrug to the older boy, as if to say “What can you do?” which got a half smile in response.  
“So, we’re all waiting, so ready to surprise this boy who should’ve been home ten minutes ago,” Isak tuned in to hear. “Everyone’s hiding, the lights are out, but he’s not coming.”  
Fuck. Were they talking about…   
“And, all of the sudden, the kitchen light turns on and everyone turns around to see Isak padding out in nothing but boxers, all sleepy and grouchy, and then he notices the entire flat full of people and lets out this little yelp-” Even his laughing too hard to continue, so Eskild pick it up.   
“Ja, he screams, and then goes, ‘Holy fuck, what the fuck are you all doing here?’ And Even gets up and he’s like, ‘Did you think I actually forgot your birthday? Why are you home?’ And, turns out, Isak had left his aunt’s early to come home and take a nap.”  
Face burning, Isak rolls his eyes. “I wasn’t expecting a party, okay? But then I had to go get dressed while everyone waited and be all social when I’d just woken up.”  
“Oh my god, you should see Isak when he’s sleepy,” Eskild gasped. “You wouldn’t recognize him. He is just glued to Even, like a baby koala or something. Sometimes we physically cannot pry him off of Even’s waist.”  
“Okay, okay,” Isak said, shaking his head. Oliver laughed but gave him a sympathetic smile.   
When the conversation turned to Noora, Isak kicked Even under the table. The older boy looked at him and he glared.   
Smiling, Even rested one hand on Isak’s knee. He slowly let it drift higher until he, quite unexpectedly, squeezed at Isak’s crotch. Isak’s knee jerked up and hit the bottom of the table. “Sorry,” he muttered, red, when everyone turned to him. “Dropped something…”

Unbuttoning his shirt, Isak started to get undressed. Even opened the door and came in behind him. “Halla,” he said, wrapping his arms around Isak’s waist. The smaller boy shivered as Even started to place gentle kisses on his neck, leaving love bites.   
“Stop,” he said, “you embarrassed me and left me alone.”  
“I’m sorry, baby,” Even apologized. “You’re just so cute. There are so many funny stories to tell about you.”  
“But you left me,” Isak whined. “And you grabbed my dick in front of everybody.”  
“Nobody saw,” Even purred into Isak’s collarbone. He knew the smaller boy wasn’t really mad.   
“But-but-” he stuttered, trying to come up with a reason to be upset. Suddenly, Even spun him around.   
“Let me make it up to you,” he said, pressing a kiss to Isak’s jaw. The smaller boy melted.   
He let Even keep marking his neck before slowly easing their mouths back together, pressing a wet, sloppy kiss to Even’s lips. He felt Even’s tongue run over his own and trembled, holding the back of the older boy’s neck, head tilted up. Even pulled him closer, and took a step forward, slamming him into a wall. “Mmm, gonna make you come so hard,” he promised, mouth ghosting Isak’s ear as he took off his hoodie.   
Hurrying to undo the rest of his buttons, Isak removed his own shirt, too. Even smiled down at him before pressing a hungry kiss to his mouth. Their tongues collided and a little bit of spit dribbled onto Isak’s chin but he didn’t fucking care. He was grinding his hips against Even’s, who smiled and grabbed him by the ass, pulling them even more flush against each other.   
“Fuck, Even, fuck,” Isak breathed, letting himself put pinned harder against the wall. He felt hot shivers run down his body as Even sucked loudly on his neck, leaving wet circles that bloomed purple red.   
“Hmm, you like that, baby?” Even hummed.   
Isak nodded, earning a bite on his collarbone. “Use your words,” Even commanded.   
“Y-yes, I like it,” Isak said. “I like it so fucking much.”  
“Good,” Even whispered. “Fuck, so good for me, baby,” he said, biting Isak’s pale skin and then licking over it. Isak let out a moan that he wasn’t expecting.   
“Come on, sweetie, bed,” Even ordered, backing away. Isak got into the bed, looking up at Even with lust-filled eyes. The older boy circled him, drank him up. He quickly tugged off Isak’s jeans- they were so fucking tight- and then his boxers. “Are you desperate, baby?” he asked. Isak nodded, whimpering. Crawling over him, Even grabbed his wrists and pinned them above his head. “You need to use your words,” he rasped.   
“Fuck, yes, Even,” Isak groaned out. “So fucking desperate, so needy for you.”   
“Yeah?” Even, pressing soft kisses to Isak’s even softer skin.   
“Mm, yes,” Isak said, tears almost welling into his eyes.   
“You’re so perfect,” Even hummed against his nipple, nipping at it.   
“Please, Even,” Isak begged. They made eye contact and Even pressed a quick kiss to Isak’s mouth. He took off his pants and boxers.  
“Alright,” he said. “Since you’ve had to put up with me all night.”  
Grinding his hips up towards Even’s, Isak nodded. Even started to trail down his stomach. He held Isak down as he grabbed the lube off of their bedside table and smeared it over his hands. He eased one finger into Isak, who shamelessly moaned out his name. He added another fingers, pushing in and out slowly, curling slightly to hit his sweet spot. “More,” Isak choked out. Smiling, Even pressed his third finger inside of him and rubbed against his prostate.   
“Mmmm, now, Even,” Isak begged, blinking wet lashes. Even smiled and pulled his fingers out before lubbing his hard cock and pressing the tip to Isak’s hole, easing his way in slowly. He let out a hiss as he felt Isak so tight around him.   
“Fuck,” Isak moaned, squeezing shut his eyes. He curled his fingers against Even’s biceps.   
Slowly starting to move faster and harder, grinding deep into the younger boy. Isak felt himself start to tremble as Even hit his sweet spot again and again. Even ran his fingers through his hair, tugging on it.   
“Mm, yes, harder,” Isak begged, and Even wasn’t sure if he wanted him to pull his hair harder or thrust harder so he settled on doing both. Isak arched his back, literally bouncing off the bed every time Even slammed into him. He stuttered out a gasp, running his nails over Even’s chest.   
His own cock was rock hard, stuck up and painful as Even gently kissed the tip. Isak whimpered, even more so when Even lifted him by the hips and drove in even deeper, if that was possible.   
“Fu-” Isak breathed, a high pitched noise escaping from somewhere inside him. Even pressed his thumbs over his hips so hard there were sure to be bruises. “I’m close,” he whined.   
Leaning down to nip and suck along Isak’s chest, the older boy hummed into him. “Come on, baby.”  
Holding tightly to Even’s hair, Isak felt himself near the edge. Even smiled and placed his hands on Isak’s throat, and sure enough Isak shuddered and came from the touch. Even was so goddamn close that just the sight of it forced a pained sigh out of him as he released, too.  
Still moving in weak, habitual thrusts, Even rode out his afterglow. Isak was staring up at him with such an exhausted wonder in his eyes.   
“Mmm,” Even sighed contentedly, tenderly pulling out and placing a light kiss to Isak’s forehead. He got them cleaned up before curling into bed besides the younger boy, wrapping his arms around his waist and pressing kisses between his shoulderblades.   
“Shit, do you think that guy and Eskild are fucking right now at his place, too?” Isak groaned. Even chuckled.   
“I don’t know,” he said. “Your guess is as good as mine.”  
“I don’t wanna think about it,” mumbled Isak.   
“No?” Even smiled. “You don’t want to think about Eskild getting it?”  
“Ugh, nei.” And then he squirmed around to face Even, a shy blush creeping up his face. “I just want to think about you.” He leaned up and pressed a kiss to the older boy’s mouth who smiled and took in the smell of his boy’s pretty curls.   
“I wanna think about you, too, baby. Now and forever.”


	26. Chapter twenty-six

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Isak wakes up early to make breakfast for Even, Vilde plans a trip to the cabin with everyone, Isak is a crab, chicken fights, fluff, they love each other so much SOS

Chapter 26  
"Hmm," Isak sighed, pressing a solid kiss to Even's forehead. The older boy was asleep, skin warm under Isak's lips. It was rare that Isak woke up before Even but, when it did occur, the smaller boy always took advantage of it.  
Now he was laying on his side, staring down at his sleepy boyfriend's face. He fixed some of his hair, gently guiding it into place. And then he got an idea.  
Even always made him food. When Isak got up, there was usually a homemade breakfast waiting for him. But now it was his chance to return the favor.  
Tiptoeing into the kitchen, he opened up their cabinet. Thankfully, they had a box of pancake mix. Picking it up, Isak looked at the ingredients. Eggs and water was all he needed to add. Grabbing the eggs from the fridge, he placed them on the counter next to the mix and got a bowl. After pouring the powder inside, Isak picked up the eggs and cracked them in, one by one. Then he added the right amount of water, greased a pan, and poured a dollop of batter onto it. Tossing the box into the trash, he watched as the pale little circle sat there. Then he realized he had no idea how long it was supposed to cook so he opened the trash to take out the box. Lifting it up, he saw what was under it. One of Eskild’s used condoms.  
“Fuck!” Isak exclaimed, dropping the box. He just touched something that touched Eskild’s- Eskild’s-  
“Ugh, fucking hell!”  
Running to the sink, Isak scrubbed his hands with so much soap that little bubbled gathered in all their dirty dishes. “Disgusting,” he muttered. Why would Eskild throw away a condom in the kitchen trashcan? Why wouldn’t he at least cover it with a paper towel? Why did Isak live with such a shameless person??  
After sufficiently washing his hands- or, as sufficient as it would get. He doubted he’d ever feel clean again- Isak grabbed a paper towel and walked to the box, which was still on the floor. He picked it up tentatively, napkin between his hand and the cum-contaminated item, and tossed it back into the trash. Then he sniffed and caught a whiff of something burning. “Fuckk,” he said again, pushing his hair away from his forehead. He rushed to the stove and lifted up the pancake with his spatula. It was rock hard and black on one side.  
Sighing, Isak dumped it into the trash. Just then, Even walked around the corner. Isak blushed and ran to the bowl of batter, standing in front of it.  
“Is something burning?” Even asked confusedly, rubbing one eye.  
“Hmm? Nei!” Isak exclaimed, voice slightly high. Even stared at him.  
“What’s that?”  
“What?”  
“Behind you.”  
Glancing behind him, Isak raised his eyebrows. “Oh! This! I made pancake batter! So we could have breakfast!”  
Starting to smile, Even asked, “Did you burn one?”  
“No??!! Even, I’m a master chef??!!”  
Taking a step towards the trash, Even lunged to open it. Isak scrambled to cut him off.  
“Oh, so you didn’t burn one?” Even asked again, opening the lid.  
Isak rolled his eyes. “Oh, well, I burned that one, but it wasn’t my fault. You see, I threw the box away in a moment of confusion and then I had to take it out to check how long the pancakes needed to cook, but, when I did, I learned that something very… unpleasant had been touching it in the trash. So I had to wash my hands!”  
“What was it touching?” Even laughed, snaking his arms around Isak’s waist.  
“Mmm… one of Eskild’s used condoms,” Isak said, tilting his head back with wide eyes.  
Laughing in surprise, Even said, “Serr?”  
“Yeah. I swear to God. And I touched something that touched it.”  
“That’s not that bad, Isak,” Even chuckled. Isak pulled away.  
“What?! Not that bad?! It was Eskild’s cum, Even!”  
“But it’s not that big a deal, you didn’t actually touch the condom.”  
“Fine. No pancakes for you.”  
“For me?” Even asked, smiling. “You made these for me?”  
“I did, until you started underplaying my trauma.”  
“Aww, that’s so sweet,” Even cooed, ignoring the second part of Isak’s sentence. He ruffled Isak’s hair as the younger boy walked back to the stove and started another pancake.  
“Nei, you’re not getting any,” Isak insisted. Even walked behind him and started to tickle the back of his neck with kisses.  
“How can I make this better?” he asked, smiling. Isak focused on his pancake, ignoring Even’s tight hold around his waist.  
“You can’t. It’s over,” he deadpanned. Even chuckled and nipped lightly at Isak’s earlobe.  
“Oi! I’m trying to cook here!” the smaller boy protested, gently elbowing Even’s ribs.  
“Well I want to eat something else,” Even purred, making Isak roll his eyes.  
“Please tell me I did not just hear those words in my own kitchen,” they heard, and both boys twisted around. Noora was staring at them with a bemused expression.  
“It’s all him,” Isak defended, flipping his pancakes. “He’s been a pain all morning. I try to get up early and surprise him and he mocks and distracts me.”  
Smiling, Noora glanced over his shoulder. “Pancakes?” she asked.  
“Yeah,” Isak affirmed, “want some?”  
“Sure.”  
Noora sat at the kitchen table. “So, what has Even been doing?”  
Even gave her an offended look. Isak huffed. “First he told me touching Eskild’s used condom wasn’t that big a deal and I was being dramatic-”  
“Wait, what?”  
“It was in the trash and I threw something away by mistake and…”  
“Ew!” Noora squealed, covering her mouth with her hands.  
“See?!” Isak exclaimed pointedly.  
“He didn’t actually touch it,” Even interjected, “he touched something that touched it.”  
“Still!” Noora said, shivering.  
Isak gave Even an “I-told-you-so” look. “Then,” he went on, “he tried to distract me from my cooking, as you heard.”  
“Maybe I’m just feeling deprived since I woke up alone, did you ever think of that?” Even asked.  
“Um, I wake up alone practically every day! You’re always out here socialising when I wake up.”  
Rolling his eyes, Even retorted, “Yes. And that’s why you’re always so grumpy.”  
“And now he calls me grumpy! Me, who got up and made him pancakes before dawn!” Isak all but shouted.  
A muffled, “Can you guys be quiet, please?” came from Linn’s room. Isak settled down.  
“Okay, okay,” Even tried to placate him. “I’m sorry, baby.” He pressed a kiss to Isak’s cheek. “Now can I have pancakes? They smell delicious.”  
Deliberating, Isak eventually sighed. “Fine,” he said. “But yours weren’t made with love.”  
Even laughed. “None?” he asked.  
Smiling and tilting his chin up towards the older boy, Isak said, “Nei. None.”  
Still chuckling, Even planted a kiss on Isak’s mouth. Then he grabbed his plate and pulled away, sitting next to Noora. Isak rolled his eyes. 

“What’s happening now?” Even asked, squinting at the screen. Isak laughed through his nose.  
“I thought you were the movie king,” he said sassily.  
“I don’t understand science stuff, that’s why I date you,” Even replied.  
“Is that the only reason?”  
“Ja. Oh- oh, did you think… oh, this is awkward,” Even joked, smiling into Isak’s neck as he squeezed around his waist.  
Scoffing, Isak rolled his eyes. “It’s not that awkward. I’m only dating you to have somebody around who can explain artsy shit to me.”  
“Oh. Well, then. It works out.”  
Turning with a smile, Isak responded. “Yeah. It does.”  
They kissed, but Even pulled back. “Seriously, what’s going on?”  
Isak sighed. “They’re living in circular time.”  
“Circular- what?”  
“Circular time,” Isak repeated. When Even stared blankly, he huffed. “Okay, so space and time are dependent variables, and, so, when one is moving-”  
Just then, both their phones dinged. Isak grabbed his first. “It’s from Vilde,” he said. Then he groaned. “She made a group chat with everyone.”  
“Everyone?”  
“All the guys. All the girls. Everyone.”  
“I’m sure this will go over well,” Even laughed.  
Opening his phone, Isak checked what she’d said. Even read over his shoulder.  
Vilde: Hi all! I hope you are all having a great summer! Since the party went so well last time, I was wondering if any of you would like to go up to Chris’s grandmother’s cabin next week? I think it would be really fun!! XXX  
“Ughhh,” Isak moaned, tipping his head back.  
“What?” Even chuckled. “It could be nice!”  
“An entire week with the girls? I don’t know if I’d even want to spend an entire week with the boys, let alone everyone!”  
“Stop being a grouch,” Even teased. “You know you’ll have a good time. Besides, you already live with me and Noora 24/7. That’s one person from each group anyway.”  
“Yes, but the two of you are mild tempered. Vilde will be squeaking around the whole time, Mags will make a big fuss out of everything, Chris will throw eggs at everyone and Sana will kill me before the week ends.”  
“You love them,” Even reminded him.  
“You really think you can stand a whole week of Vilde’s cheeriness?”  
Even rolled his eyes. “You know what I think?” he asked.  
“What?”  
“I think you love Vilde most of all.”  
“I do not,” Isak whined.  
Smiling, Even shrugged. “Well, I do. And you do, deep down. She’s a really good person, Isak. But, you know, I bet she’s having the same trouble about you. ‘Do I really want to spend a whole week around Isak’s crabbiness?’”  
“I’m not a crab,” Isak argued.  
“When you want to be, you are the biggest crab in the world.”  
Scoffing, Isak turned away again. Some people had replied on the group chat.  
Eva: Sounds fun!  
Magnus: Awesome!! Psyched!!  
Noora: I would be down.  
Turning back to Even, Isak raised his eyebrows. “Do you want to spend a week with this crab?” he asked.  
Chuckling, Even kissed the top of his head. “I want to spend my life with this crab.”

A week later, they were unpacking. Chris’s grandma’s cabin was big. There were five bedrooms, so everybody only had to have one roomie, except none of the boys and girls wanted to share, so Mahdi volunteered to sleep on the couch.  
“I really can sleep out here,” Noora tried to argue.  
“I don’t mind. There are more windows out here,” Mahdi shrugged. “I can watch the sun come up and stuff.”  
And, so, the room arrangements ended up that Eva and Vilde were sharing a room, Noora was alone, Chris and Sana were sharing, Mahdi was on the couch, Jonas and Magnus were together and Isak and Even were together.  
“This is going to be so fun!” Vilde had squeaked before everyone headed off to unpack. Isak shoved all his tshirts into one of their drawers.  
“I don’t even like my friends that much,” he muttered. “Why shouldn’t we just stay in here all week?”  
Chuckling, Even folded each of his shirts and placed them away carefully. “Because that would be rude?”  
“I don’t care,” Isak groaned, flopping against Even’s chest. When his nose got bent, he sniffled. “Ow.”  
“Whose fault was that?”  
“Nobody’s.”  
“Mmhmm,” Even hummed, giving in and wrapping his arms around Isak. They stayed glued together like that for several minutes. Even couldn’t believe he was lucky enough to have this precious boy tucked in his embrace.  
“What’re you thinking?” Isak asked, voice soft from the hug.  
“Nothing,” Even assured him. “Just how much I love you.”  
He could feel Isak’s lips quirk up. “I love you, too.”

“Ahhh!” Vilde shrieked as Magnus cannonballed into the lake beside her. She held up her arms in an instinct reaction, but it did little to stop the flying drops of water from hitting her. It didn’t really matter. She was standing waist-deep in water, anyway.  
A ways away, Chris was swimming menacingly towards an unaware Noora and Eva. She kept her eyes trained on the two girls and popped up at the last moment, tackling both of them down.  
“Chris!” Eva exclaimed when she broke the surface again. Chris was cackling. Noora laughed, too, tipping her head back, wet hair glinting in the sun. Her laughter changed to a scream when Even grabbed her waist and chucked her into the water again. Chris grinned and slapped him a highfive.  
“Even?” Noora sputtered. The tall boy smiled and shrugged.  
Sitting on some rocks with Jonas and Mahdi, Sana just behind them on shore, Isak rolled his eyes at his goofy boyfriend.  
“Fucking hell,” Jonas muttered, smiling. Isak followed his gaze to Vilde balancing on Magnus’s shoulders.  
“Who wants to chicken fight?” the boy asked excitedly.  
“Um, nei,” Noora replied, grinning.  
Eva wrinkled her nose up at Vilde. “Think I can take you?” she asked.  
Biting her tongue between her teeth, Vilde shook her head. Even swam over and hunched down, offering himself to Eva. The girl giggled and climbed on.  
“They’re so childish,” Sana laughed as Mahdi jumped up and splashed towards the fight.  
“Me next!” he called.  
Isak watched and Eva and Vilde locked hands and began to push at each other. They both squeaked and squealed as they lost and regained their balance until, finally, Vilde tipped backwards and fell, waving her hands sporadically. Eva followed a second later.  
Popping up, Vilde wiped her face. “Did we lose?” she asked Magnus, who nodded.  
Eva popped up behind her, wrapping her arms around her waist and dragging them both back into the water. Just then, Isak noticed Mahdi climbing onto Even’s shoulders.  
“Isak!” Magnus shouted. He waved him over.  
Jonas and Sana stared at him. After deliberating a beat, Isak said, “Fuck it,” and ran to his friend.  
Hiking himself up on Magnus’s shoulders, Isak grabbed Mahdi’s hands. They pushed and pulled. Smiling, Isak shoved his feet into Even’s face. “Fowl play!” the older boy shouted. Mahdi laughed as he pushed harder.  
“You’re cheating, man!”  
Grinning ear to ear, Isak replied, “You think there are rules here?” as he gave one final push and sent Mahdi flying into the lake. 

Later, when he was drying off, he went to grab a pair of boxers. Everyone else was already changed and downstairs. When he opened the dresser, Isak noticed a piece of paper folded inside it.  
On the paper, there was a drawing of his head on a crab’s body. “My crab” was scrawled in Even’s handwriting above it, alone with several hearts. Isak grinned and pressed the paper to his chest.  
Maybe this week wouldn’t be too bad after all.


	27. Chapter twenty-seven

Chapter 27  
“Hei, Isak!” Vilde exclaimed perkily. Isak shut his eyes and let out a quiet sigh. He’d been hoping to pop downstairs, grab something to eat, and disappear back up to an eagerly waiting Even. But of course Vilde came down for a midnight snack at the exact same time.   
“Hei, Vilde,” he said, turning to face her. Vilde looked sleepy. Her hair was pulled into a ponytail but it’d mostly fallen out. Her zipup was pulled over a white tshirt and a pair of sweatpants. Isak was taken a little aback. He’d never seen her look so vulnerable.  
“Were you coming down for food?” she asked.  
“Oh, yeah. You?”  
Vilde bit her lower lip. “Eva was hungry.”  
“Oh yeah. How are things between you two?”  
“Good!” Vilde perked up. “I… yeah, things are good. It’s a little hard, sometimes, because I… I’m still not so incrediably comfortable being with a girl all the time but… it’s good.”  
Isak smiled. “Yeah,” he said. “I get that. But it gets easier.”  
“You’re gay, Isak,” Vilde stated, smiling. Isak snorted.   
“Yep.”  
“No, I just mean… we’re the only ones who are gay. Eva and Even are both bi or pan, so, I dunno… it might not be easier for them, but it isn’t the same.”  
Nodding, Isak said, “Yeah, of course.”  
“So I was thinking… I don’t know, if you’d ever like to talk about… anything… you could always come to me, Isak.” She let her eyes dance around the room.   
The blond boy blinked a few times. “Thank you, Vilde,” he said after a moment, sincerity lacing his voice. She blushed, smiled and shrugged. “Serr. And if you ever need to talk, either, then I’m here.”  
Vilde grinned. “We’re like gay pals,” she said cheerily.   
Huffing, Isak replied, “Sure, Vilde.”  
Vilde’s eyes shone. 

Isak finally managed to get back upstairs to Even. The older boy blinked open one eye and then threw one hand dramatically across his forehead.  
“Oh, there you are,” he said. “I’d almost died waiting for you.”  
Rolling his eyes, Isak jumped into bed beside him, landing his elbows somewhere in Even’s ribs. The older boy laughed and choked at once. “Jesus, you are trying to kill me.”  
Isak smiled and nuzzled into Even’s side. “Hei,” he whispered. It was dark in the room, shadowy and quiet.   
“Halla,” Even replied, drawing him closer with one arm. “What took you so long?”  
“Vilde,” Isak said simply. Even chuckled.   
“Ah.”  
“Are you tired?”  
“Not that tired.”  
“Nei? The chicken fights didn’t wear you out?”  
“Nei,” Even laughed. “They weren’t too tiring.”  
Isak scrambled to crawl on top of Even, laying himself flat on the other boy, head on chest.   
Even narrowed his eyes at him. “Comfortable?” he asked.   
Smiling, Isak nodded. “Yeah,” he replied, “very.”  
Twisting his fingers through Isak’s hair, Even grinned. “Good.”  
“What are we going to do tomorrow?”  
“I don’t know.”  
“Hmmm. I think Jonas said we’ll hike.”  
“I’d like that.”  
Pressing his face flat into Even’s chest, Isak grinned. He planted a soft kiss to his shirt. “You’re so warm,” he sighed.   
Rubbing Isak’s back, Even laughed. “What’s got you all soft?” he asked. Isak rolled his eyes.   
“Nothing,” he said.  
“Okay,” Even agreed, staring up at the ceiling. Isak pulled himself up by Even’s shoulders and tilted his chin forward for a kiss.   
Even pressed his mouth to Isak’s and then smoothed back his hair. “Goodnight, my sweet boy,” he sighed when Isak closed his eyes and wrapped his arms a little tighter around Even’s waist.   
“Goodnight, Ev,” Isak muttered back. Even turned out the light. 

“Wakey wakey, boys!”   
Isak groaned and pressed his face further into Even’s chest. Somebody-one of the girls- was pounding at their door.   
“Time to rise and shine- we’re gonna go out!”  
“Nooo,” Isak sighed. He felt Even stir underneath him.   
“We’re coming in- you better be decent!”   
Chris, Sana and Eva barged into their room, each of them fully dressed with a huge smile. Isak pulled the blanket up over himself. He felt Even curl his fist on the back of his shirt and stretch a little.   
“Good morning, ladies,” he greeted, squinting at the girls.   
“Hei, Even,” Eva said, smiling and tipping her head towards him. “And hei, Isak,” she added. He was still hiding under the comforter.   
“Mm,” he grunted in response.   
“You guys better get dressed- we still have to wake up Jonas and Magnus, then we’re all gonna go for a hike.”  
“Sounds great,” Even said pulling the cover off Isak, who whined and burrowed deeper into Even’s shirt.   
“Nooo,” he groaned when the cold hit him. He could practically feel Sana’s judgemental look.   
“We’ll be down in five,” Even assured the girls, who smiled and nodded. They closed the door with a soft click. “Good morning, baby,” the older boy greeted Isak quietly.   
“No, no good morning,” Isak pleaded. “Sleep.”  
Chuckling, Even gently nudged Isak’s face up. “We gotta head down. Everyone’ll be waiting for us.”  
“So?” Isak asked hopefully. He’d finally opened his eyes.  
Cocking his head, Even sighed through his nose. “Come on,” he said definitively after a moment. “We’re getting up.”  
“Noo,” Isak whined again, clutching at Even’s shirt. The older boy softly shoved him away, onto the mattress, and got up.  
“Yesss,” Even mocked. “Here.” He tossed a tshirt at Isak, who glared at him.   
“I don’t wanna hike. It’s too early.”  
“If we wait till the afternoon it’ll be too hot,” Even reminded him.   
“But- but I’m too tired, Even,” Isak replied, exasperated.   
Even sighed but smiled when Isak wasn’t looking. He’d never admit it but he secretly loved when his boyfriend acted like a little brat. It was annoying, sure, but it just made Even want to scoop him up and melt all that meanness away.   
Which is what he did now. Turning, he pressed a warm kiss to Isak’s mouth, savoring the way Isak let out a surprised little squeak and turned his chin up, leaning back on his palms. Even licked along his lower lip before pulling away and looking into his eyes. Smoothing back Isak’s sleepy curls, he pressed a second kiss to his forehead, and then to his nose. Isak giggled.   
“Can you be good for me?” Even asked. Rolling his eyes with a small smile, Isak nodded. “Good. You’re so good. Now get dressed.”  
Isak sighed and took off his hoodie, pulling the shirt Even had thrown at him over his head. “This is yours,” he said, looking down at the pattern. Even shrugged. 

In a few minutes, they were both downstairs. The girls and Mahdi had made breakfast, and Jonas and Magnus were still getting dressed. They were all eating around the kitchen island. “So, we’ll head down by the lake, and then up these cliffs. There’s supposed to be a little waterfall somewhere around here,” Noora was saying, examining the map with Sana.   
“No, I think that waterfall is here,” Sana argued, pointing at a different area. Noora smirked at her, eyebrows drawn.   
“Sana, it says right here, ‘waterfall.’”  
“I think the map is wrong,” Sana disagreed, shaking her head. Noora rolled her eyes.   
Suddenly a cheery, “Good morning!” was heard from behind them. Everyone turned to see a smiling Magnus followed by a tired-looking Jonas.   
“Halla, everyone,” the latter said, sitting down and grabbing a banana.   
“Hi, boys,” Eva greeted. “We’re gonna head out in ten minutes.”  
“Sounds good,” they both chorused. Magnus grinned. “Jinx, dude.”  
Rolling his eyes, Jonas looked around at the group. “So, how did everyone sleep?”   
“Good!” Vilde replied, smiling from her position on the kitchen counter. The others agreed.   
“So, what’s the plan today?”  
“Well, we’re gonna go hiking and then picnic when we get to the waterfall,” Eva said, “and then, I dunno… head back, play some games? There’s a ouija board around here somewhere.”  
She smiled at the other girls, who all laughed and rolled their eyes.   
“Sounds great,” Jonas replied. 

An hour later, they were all sweaty, tired, and cracking up. Well, all except Vilde.   
“Guys!” she pouted, stomping one foot. “It’s not funny!”   
“It’s pretty funny,” Noora teased. The boys were trying not to laugh too hard, since they didn’t want to hurt Vilde’s feelings, but the girls were all but crying.   
“Nei, now these shorts are ruined!” the blonde insisted, twisting to look down at her mud-covered butt.   
“It wasn’t even the fall,” Chris wheezed. “It was the noise you made! You sounded like fucking elmo!”  
Sana doubled over at this, gasping for air. “God, Vilde, please fall more often,” she begged.   
Eva had both hands over her mouth and she was shaking, but she tried calm down when she saw Vilde blinking furiously.   
“It’s okay,” she said, still smiling too wide for Vilde’s liking. “I’m sure the mud will wash out.” She slipped off her flannel and tied it around Vilde’s waist. “There, now you can’t even see it.”  
Vilde pursed her lips and looked down. She wasn’t terribly pleased- her pink shirt didn’t go with the orangey red of Eva’s flannel- but it would do.   
The group went on. Isak and Jonas were trailing in the back, arguing about something or other. Noora was leading confidently, with Chris “helping” by making funny comments about their surroundings. Vilde, Eva, Sana and Even were all clumped in the middle, talking about movies, while Magnus and Mahdi were behind them, taking turns kicking a pebble back and forth. “I think we’re almost there,” Noora announced from the front.   
“Thank god, I’m starving,” Magnus groaned.   
When they got to the waterfall, everyone sighed in awe. It was absolutely gorgeous. There was a small clearing right by it, so they set up the picnic there and everyone sat down for lunch.   
“No way anybody could survive that jump,” Eva was saying, eyeing the cliff that led down to the lake below.   
“I think if you jumped out far enough, you might,” Mahdi argued. “As long as the water wasn’t too shallow.”  
“I’ll try it,” Even said lightly, going to stand. Isak scrambled up from his sitting position and grabbed his hand.   
“Nei, what the fuck!?” he exclaimed, holding Even so tight that both their knuckles went white. He hadn’t noticed anything out of the ordinary going on with Even, what the fuck was happening.  
The older boy looked at him with drawn eyebrows. “I was kidding, Issy,” he said softly, running his thumb over Isak’s hand. Isak let out a breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding.   
“Oh. Oh, yeah. Sorry,” he mumbled, sitting back down. Everyone was staring at them. Seeing this, Jonas cleared his throat.   
“Yeah,” he said, “but the real question is, how did Magnus survive the fall from Eva’s bed that time?” He knew it was random and irrelevant but he also knew it would take the attention off of a very flushed Isak.   
Luckily, Magnus jumped for the bait. “That wasn’t funny!” he defended.   
Privately, Even sat beside Isak and pulled him into his side. “Hey,” he said softly, “I’m okay.”  
“I know,” Isak assured him. “I didn’t assume- I just thought maybe- and you seemed so serious.”  
“It’s okay, baby,” Even shushed him. “It was a stupid joke, anyway.”  
“No, I’m just-”  
“Shh,” Even breathed, pressing a kiss to his temple. “I’m sorry I scared you.”  
“It’s okay,” Isak sniffed.   
“Guys!” Magnus cut in. “Do you remember when Mahdi fell at the skate park?”  
“Hmm?” Isak hummed, attention snapping away from Even.   
“When he fell doing that flip.”  
“Oh, yeah.”  
“Nobody laughed then!”  
Rolling his eyes, Isak said, “That’s because it was on cement. And I did laugh, once I realized he was okay.”  
“I fell from a very high bed! I could’ve hit my head on the side table!”  
“Let it go, Mags,” Isak laughed, smiling. Even smiled, too. He squeezed Isak’s side. 

“You fucking terrified me,” Isak said, pressing Even harder against the tree trunk. Everyone else had finished lunch and was wandering around, checking out their surroundings.   
“I know, baby, I’m sorry,” Even replied between heated kissed, holding Isak by the back of the neck.   
“I thought you were gonna jump, I thought-”  
“I know, I know,” Even soothed him, holding him tight. “But I’m right here, okay? I promise. I’m okay.”  
Instead of responding, Isak just kept kissing Even, scared and needy. Even snuck his hands under Isak’s shirt.   
“Hey, guys- fuck, sorry,” said Mahdi, rounding a bend. Isak shot off of Even and adjusted his shirt.   
“It’s fine,” he said rushedly. “We weren’t, like…”  
“Yeah. Um, we’re gonna head back to the cabin now.”  
“Okay.”  
The two boys followed Mahdi back to the clearing. Even took Isak’s hand.   
“Hey, I found Evak,” Mahdi announced upon reuniting with the group. Isak rolled his eyes. “Sana, you were right,” the boy added.   
“Right about what?” asked Even.   
“That you two were hooking up,” Mahdi explained casually.   
Isak scoffed. “Huh?!” he huffed. “I would hardly call that hooking up!”  
“Sorry, they were making out,” corrected Mahdi sarcastically.   
“Surprise, surprise,” Sana sighed.   
Isak rolled his eyes.


	28. Chapter twenty-eight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Isak's mom is upset, plus ouija board!!!

Chapter 28  
Soft and cuddly and shirtless. This was the Isak that Even liked best, the one who giggled and blushed and napped on top of him. But then he also liked needy Isak best, and grumpy Isak and funny Isak and sassy Isak... Even liked every Isak best, in every universe.  
But in this universe? When they'd all gone to rest after the hike and Isak was sleepy next to him? That seemed best right about now.  
Pressing a kiss to the corner of Isak's mouth, Even pulled him tighter.  
"You're so cute," he sighed. The younger boy squinted open one and and glared up at him.  
"Am not," he mumbled, but there was no hiding the smile and blush that bloomed over his face.  
"Are too."  
"Hmm. Well you're pretty cute, too."  
"I thought I was a giraffe."  
Squinting, Isak replied, "Oh yeah..." like he'd just remember how uncute Even was.  
Chuckling, the older boy brought his hand up and down Isak's shoulder. Suddenly, the smaller boy's phone went off.  
Isak harrumphed and reached over Even to grab it off the mattress. "It's Eskild," he huffed. "Says he misses you more than me."  
"How sweet!" Even cooed. Isak rolled his eyes. “Tell him I miss him, too.”  
Isak snorted and passed his phone to Even. “How about you text him?”  
Grabbing the phone, Even grinned and went to start typing, but then his smile falls. “Um… Is?”  
Glancing up, Isak caught the concern in Even’s eyes. “What?” he asked, taking the phone back.  
Eskild: But, anyway, Isak, I don’t know if she’s already told you, but your mom showed up the other day… she was very upset, so I brought her in and gave her tea and called her nurse on the number you gave me. She’s okay now, but while she was here she was very scared.  
Furrowing his brow, Isak typed back, "Did she say anything? Did she ask for me?"  
Eskild: She asked for you, but I said you were camping with Jonas. She said that must be fun. Then she said a woman was following her, and that the woman was Jezebel. So I brought her inside. Her nurse said the somebody following her thing happens a lot.  
Isak: Ok. Thanks for letting me know Eskild. And thanks for helping her.  
Eskild: Of course.  
Isak closed the conversation and then opened his contacts, calling his mom.  
She picked up after a few rings. "Isak? Isak, is that you?"  
"Hi, mama," Isak said gently. Even watched quietly.  
"Oh, my son. Where are you? I went to see you yesterday but you weren't there."  
"I know, mama. Eskild told you, remember? I'm camping with Jonas."  
"Are you hurt? Did somebody hurt you?"  
Isak sighed. "I'm not hurt, mama."  
"Where are you, Isak? I can hear you but I can't see you. You sound so far away."  
Biting his lower lip, Isak replied, "We're talking on the phone, mama. It's okay."  
"The phone? ... oh. The phone. Of course. I'm sorry, my sweet boy. I- I must have been confused."  
"Don't be sorry," Isak told her soothingly.  
"Isak? I think somebody's been following me."  
"I promise nobody's following you, mama. Do you remember when I was younger, and we would go for long walks in the park? And you would teach me about the constellations?"  
".... yes."  
"I want you to think about those walks, mama. Nobody was following us then. Nobody's following you now. Just pretend I'm there with you, mama. I'll protect you, okay? Just call me if you need me."  
"Okay. Okay, Isak. I love you, my son."  
Swallowing, Isak pushed back his hair. "I love you, too."  
When he hung up, Even looked at him with eyebrows raised. "So?" he said.  
"It's fine," Isak replied. "She, um... she thinks Jezebel is stalking her or something? It's fine."  
Even stared at him. "I'm sorry," he said softly after a beat. "That must be scary."  
Isak went to reply something like, "No, it's not a big deal, I don't fucking care," but instead he surprised himself by curling into Even's side and whispering, "Yeah."  
"Do you want to talk about it?"  
"Um... she just gets really freaked out sometimes. I used to be able to calm her down when we were together but now... I feel like I'm not doing enough, you know? Like she needs me and I'm not there. Just like... him."  
Sighing, Even tightened his grip about the smaller boy. "You're doing everything you can," he said quietly. "When you were talking to her on the phone, I wanted to cry because you sounded so patient and kind and caring. You're there for her. Just because you're not hurting yourself anymore doesn't mean you're not there for her."  
Sniffling, Isak moved closer to him. He didn't say anything. After a while, he fell asleep. 

When a knock sounded at the door a few hours later, Isak was still asleep in bed and Even was sitting up, reading. “Come in,” the older boy said quietly.  
Eva peaked her head in. Her eyes got soft when she saw Isak’s head in Even’s lap. “Hi. We’re gonna play with the ouija board. Do you guys wanna join?”  
“Um…” Even looked down at Isak. “I’ll wake him, see what he wants.”  
“Okay,” Eva agreed. She watched Isak as his forehead creased and he sighed. “Is he good?”  
“Yeah,” Even breathed. “Mom stuff. But he’s fine.”  
Nodding, Eva said, “Well, we’ll be down there.”  
“Okay.”  
After she disappeared, Even gently shook Isak’s shoulder. The smaller boy blinked awake. “Hey,” he said, “did I fall asleep?”  
“Yeah. The others are gonna play ouija board. Do you wanna play?”  
Squinting, Isak yawned. “Sure.”  
“Okay,” Even replied, rubbing his back. Isak sat up and stretched.  
“Do you think we’ll conjure some chill spirits?” he asked. Even wrapped his arms around Isak’s waist and pressed a soft kiss to the back of his neck.  
“Hopefully.”

“Okay, the boys are here,” Vilde said excitedly. “We’ve only just started. But I don’t think all of our hands will fit.”  
“It’s okay, Vilde,” Isak said. “We’ll just watch for now.”  
Sana and Magnus were around watching as the others all nervously played the board. Isak and Even joined them.  
“Okay, spirits…” Noora said, staring at the board, “Does anybody in this room have a secret?”  
Everyone shuffled nervously as they pushed. The planchette moved slowly towards the yes. When it got there, they all glanced around.  
“My turn!” Vilde quipped. “Who is it?”  
They all stared seriously as it moved to a letter. E.  
“E?” asked Magnus, peering over their shoulders at the letter. “So… Eva or Even?”  
The two Es glanced at each other. Isak stared at Even and Vilde at Eva.  
“Do either of you have a big secret?” Noora asked.  
Even shrugged. “I’m an open book,” he said, eyes drifting to Eva. She blushed.  
“I- I don’t have a secret,” the auburn-haired girl mumbled.  
Everyone was quiet until Jonas said, “Okay… why doesn’t Magnus want to play?”  
“I told you, I’m just not in the mood!” Mags quipped from the background.  
They ignored him and watched as the planchette spelled out S-C-A-R-E-D.  
“Scared? Dude, you’re afraid of ghosts?” asked Mahdi. Magnus blushed. But the spirits weren’t done. A-F-T-E-R was spelled next, making everybody furrow their brows. L-A-S-T T-I-M-E.  
“Scared after last time?” Jonas repeated. He turned to stare at Magnus. “What the fuck happened after you played ouija last time?”  
Red, Magnus glanced around. “Nothing,” he mumbled.  
“Come on, dude,” Mahdi urged, “You gotta tell us now.”  
Taking a deep breath, Magnus said, “Okay, well… I played with my brother, once. We were at my grampa’s and we found the board in his basement. He lives in one of those super old houses and so we started asking about the spirits that… died there.”  
Everyone stared at him. “And we eventually made contact with one guy who said he’d… hung himself. Right there, in the basement. He, um… he said sometimes he talked to the people that lived there now, and told them to join him. And then all the lights went out.”  
“Fuck,” breathed Eva.  
“Yeah. So, it was pitch black, and I started to cry. I was only, like, nine. Anyway, we couldn’t see shit and we both ran to the top of the stairs and tried to leave the basement, but the door was locked. We were banging on the door and screaming, and then… I heard this voice.”  
Isak swallowed and burrowed closer to Even. Vilde was squeezing Eva’s hand so tight she thought it might break. Mahdi and Jonas were holding hands, too.  
“I heard this voice. This horrible, scratchy voice. It was right in my ear. And it said… ‘Why don’t you two join me? It gets awful lonely down here, all alone.’ And Nils, my brother, started shouting, ‘No, no, no!’” But then the door opened and my mom was standing there, looking down at us all concerned. The lights were on upstairs. And, when she turned the switch, they came on in the basement. She went down and… there was no board. My grandpa said he’d never owned one. But, when we told him about the spirit, he got all white and said the relator had told him somebody’d hung himself in the basement a really long time ago. He said he’d forgotten about it completely, so there was no way for us to know.”  
Everybody was dead quiet. Magnus rubbed his arms.  
“Serious?” Chris asked. Magnus nodded.  
“Fuck. Fuck, why’d you make him tell us?” Eva laughed nervously, slapping Jonas’s arm.  
“Sorry,” Jonas replied, bringing up his hands.  
“Whatever,” Magnus said softly. “It was a long time ago.”  
Rolling his eyes, Mahdi said, “That’s fucked up, dude. But it’s my turn.”  
They all tried to calm down as Mahdi asked, “Um… who’s gonna get married first?”  
He tried to keep his question light. The planchette moved immediately to the letter I, and then to E. Isak blushed but Even smiled wide and wrapped his arms around the smaller boy’s waist. Everyone else laughed. “No surprise there,” Mahdi commented.  
And then the lights went out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lol, fuck me! I'll try to resolve the cliffhanger by tonight!!!


	29. Chapter twenty-nine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Resolution to the cliffhanger!

Chapter 29  
“Um…” Eva trailed nervously, looking around. It was still a little light out, so they could see each other, but not very well. “What just happened?”  
“Chris, I swear to god-” Noora began, but Chris cut her off.   
“Hey, hey, this isn’t me! But we know the power goes out here a lot. It’s probably just that.”  
“Is Kasper around?” Vilde asked hopefully.   
“No, he only works winters,” the girl replied.   
Everyone sat quietly for a moment, until a huge gust of wind shook the cabin. Vilde squeaked.   
“Okay, enough ouija board,” Eva said, putting the game back in its box. “Let’s light some candles.”  
Noora got up and followed her out of the room.   
“Ooh, candles, romantic,” Even teased to Isak, who was pressed into him tight. “Candles for our wedding.”  
“Shut up, aren’t you freaked out?” Isak groaned, pressing his face into Even’s neck.  
“Nei?” Even laughed. “Are you?”  
“... I never liked the dark,” Isak admitted quietly. Even smiled and nuzzled his nose into Isak’s cheek.   
“Okay, we found some candles,” Noora announced, reentering the room with Eva. They started to light them.   
“Has anyone ever died here?”   
They all turned to Magnus, who was staring at the floor with wide eyes.   
“Um…” Chris trailed. “My grama’s never mentioned that.”  
Jonas took out his phone. “I’ll google it.”  
They all waited patiently until he took a deep breath. “Okay, nobody freak out…”  
“Fuck!” Eva exclaimed, covering her face with her hands.   
“I said don’t freak… but somebody jumped from those cliffs we were at earlier. In 1971.”  
“Jumped? Like suicide?” asked Vilde nervously.   
“Yeah.”  
“That sounds a lot like Magnus’s story,” the blonde continued, twisting her hands in her lap.   
“Yeah, but… it wasn’t in the house,” Jonas tried to reason. Everyone sat in silence.   
“There’s no use being scared,” Sana said after a minute. “Spirits aren’t real. Come on, will somebody help me with dinner?”  
The group shifted uncomfortably. “Sure,” Noora said, standing and walking into the kitchen with Sana. Vilde trailed after a moment. 

A few hours later, everyone had all but calmed down. There was still no power and it was darker now, but they’d eaten and gotten over their original heebie-jeebies. Now they were just on edge.   
Jonas, Magnus and Mahdi had gone out for a smoke. Eva and Isak were in the living room, playing a game of war, and the other girls and Even were in the kitchen trying to make some fancy dessert.   
“The candles are going out,” Isak observed. Eva sighed.   
“Chris!” she yelled.  
“What?”  
“Do you have more candles?”  
“There should be more in the basement.”  
Eva drew in her breath and looked at Isak. “Can you get them?” she asked.   
Eyes wide, Isak shook his head. “Nei? You get them!”  
“Come on! Don’t make me go down there alone!” Eva whined.   
Rolling his eyes, Isak stood. “Fine. But you’re coming. And you’re going first.”  
The two nervously approached the basement door. Eva was holding a flashlight as she opened it. It creaked open, revealing a dark set of wooden stairs.   
“Okay,” Eva breathed. “We got this.”  
Behind her, Isak agreed. “Yeah, it’s totally fine.”  
Eva took the first tentative step. They slowly made their way down, each stair letting out loud squeaks. Finally, Eva reached the cement floor. Isak was still edging his way down when she turned the corner into the rest of the basement.   
And then Eva screamed so loudly Isak jumped a foot and was back on the stairs, pushing into him, shrieking, “THERE’S SOMEBODY DOWN HERE!”  
They burst back onto the first floor just as everyone else came running to see what all the noise was. Isak turned to Eva, who was trembling and pale as death.   
“What happened?!” he shouted, grabbing her shoulders.   
Eva shook her head. “I-I-I was shining the flashlight around, looking for the c-candles, and I-I saw somebody in the corner!” Tears welled up in her eyes. Isak, also shaking, pulled her into a tight hug.   
“Fuck, are you kidding?” asked Chris.   
Eva pulled her face away from Isak’s chest, crying in earnest now, and screamed, “Why the fuck would I be kidding?!” She buried her face in Isak’s shirt again and he smoothed down the back of her hair.   
“It’s okay, it’s okay,” he murmured in her hair as she cried, pressing his lips to the top of her head.   
“Nei, it isn’t! Somebody is down there, we have to get out!”  
“Are you sure you weren’t just jumpy because of Magnus’s story?” Noora asked frantically, bringing one hand to her forehead.   
“Yes! I mean- I don’t know,” Eva sobbed.   
“Did you get a good look at him?” Even asked.   
Eva shook her head. “I only saw him for half a second- I don’t know, maybe it was something else.”  
She’d started to calm down. Isak was still holding her.   
“I’m gonna go check it out,” Even decided after a moment. Isak looked at him with horrified eyes.   
“Nei?! Even, there could be a crazy person down there!”  
“It’s okay,” Even assured him. He went to the kitchen and came back with one of the steak knives and the brightest lantern. “I’ll be right back,” he promised.   
Isak and Eva backed away from the door, joining the other girls in their semicircle.   
They were all deadly quiet. Eva was still sniffling into Isak’s shirt.   
“Should we ask if he’s okay?” Vilde whispered after a few minutes had passed. Nobody replied.  
After what felt like fifty years, they heard footsteps come back up the stairs. Everyone held their breath until the door swung open and Even reemerged.   
“Nobody’s there,” he said definitively.   
“Are you sure?” Eva asked immediately, pulling herself away from Isak.   
“Positive. I checked everywhere. Twice. There’s a door down there, though. If anyone was there, they’re gone now.”  
Letting out a shaky breath, Eva said, “Fuck. Fuck. This isn’t fun, anymore.”   
“Are you okay?” Vilde asked nervously, coming over and gently taking Eva’s hand. The auburn-haired girl nodded.   
Everyone slowly stopped shaking. They all made their way to the living room and sat in silence. Isak was curled up in Even’s lap. “Don’t ever go down into scary basements again,” he mumbled.   
“What do we do now?” asked Chris.   
“We can’t do much. We have to trust Even that nobody’s there and try to calm down,” Sana said.   
“Yeah, let’s do something to take our minds off of it,” Noora suggested. “Um… let’s play MFK or something.”  
“Shouldn’t the other boys be back by now?” Vilde asked nervously, staring out the window. “It’s so dark.”  
“Fuck, you don’t think somebody left the basement and then found them?” Chris breathed.   
“Shut up, Chris,” Eva groaned.   
“What? Seriously, should we go look for them?”  
“I’m sure they’re fine,” Sana assured everyone. “Mahdi said they weren’t gonna go too far. If anything happened, we would’ve heard.”  
Noora nodded.   
“They’re probably just late because they’re so stoned,” Isak reasoned. “When they get baked, they’re pretty dumb.”  
“Yeah… okay…” Vilde trailed, but she didn’t move her eyes away from the window. All she could see was blackness.   
Suddenly, a bang on the front door made everybody jump. “That’s probably them,” Isak said. Sure enough, they heard Mahdi’s voice ring out a second later.   
“Where is everyone?”  
“Living room,” Sana shouted back. The boy came in and glanced around.   
“Why do you all look so spooked?” he asked.   
“Eva thought she saw somebody in the basement,” Noora explained. “Where are Jonas and Magnus?”  
“They wanted to stay out, but I was getting cold.” He didn’t seem that out of it. “The stuff Jonas brought was bad, so none of us even had that much. Like barely any. I dunno why they’re staying out there.”  
He shrugged and sat beside Isak and Even, tackling them. “Let me join your cuddles, I’m freezing.”  
“Ugh, move,” Isak replied, shoving at him. Even laughed and wrapped his spare arm around Mahdi.   
“Did you see anyone out there?” asked Chris.   
“In the woods? No,” Mahdi replied.   
“Okay. Good. We’re gonna play MFK.”  
“I’m down.”

They played for a while, switching between MKF and some other, similar games. At one point, Sana got up to get a snack. She walked out of the living room and towards the kitchen. “Um, guys,” she said from the hall. Everyone got up and went to see what was wrong.   
As soon as they got to the hall, they realized they were surrounded in complete darkness. “What happened to the candles?” asked Vilde.   
“They’re all gone,” Noora replied, looking around.   
“Gone?” Eva breathed.   
“Gone. And the lantern.”  
The group stood tight to each other. “Fuck, I’m gonna cry again,” Eva whispered, voice high pitched.   
“I’m sure… I’m sure…” Sana trailed. But she had nothing to say.   
“Does this mean somebody’s in the house?” Vilde asked.   
“Jonas?” Isak said tentatively. “Mags? This isn’t funny, guys.”  
There was no answer.   
“I think we should call the police,” Chris said.   
“Let’s just check the kitchen. Maybe nobody put any candles in the hall,” Noora said. They all shuffled to the kitchen. It was dark there, too.  
Suddenly, they heard a noise from the direction of the basement. Very quietly, Even walked to the door leading out and tried to open it. “It’s locked,” he whispered. “Chris, where’s the key?”  
“Upstairs,” Chris replied, eyes wide.   
They all froze when they heard the creak of the basement door swinging open and closed. Footsteps approached the kitchen.   
“Everybody stay very quiet,” Even ordered, walking in front of the group and grabbing the steak knife again.   
Eva had covered her face with her hands and was squatting on the ground. Vilde kneeled beside her, keeping one hand on her back and her eyes wide on Even  
Noora had her face buried in Chris’s shoulder. Chris was also staring at Even, gripping Sana’s hand tight. Mahdi and Isak were pressed tight to each other, breathing shallowly.   
“I wish you’d join me,” they all heard in a low, raspy voice from the hallway. Eva let out a sob. “It gets so lonely.”   
Emerging from the hall, a tall, shadowy, cloaked figure came into view. It was absolutely silent until, suddenly, a loud baging came from the door behind them. Everyone screamed and spun around.   
In the window, Jonas and Magnus were cracking up. Above the group, the lights flicked on. Everyone turned back around to see Kasper taking the hood of his hoodie off by the lightswitch.  
Jonas and Magnus piled in, both crying from laughing so hard. The group stood, stunned.   
“Fuck, fuck, you guys,” Jonas panted, doubled over from laughing so hard.  
“Are you fucking with me right now?” Eva said, staring at him, red faced. He shaking in silent laughter. The girl shook her head and shoved at his shoulders. “Are you FUCKING KIDDING ME, Jonas?!”  
He put his hands up, still laughing. She started punching his chest, over and over. “That’s not fucking funny! Fuck! That was so mean, fuck!”  
“I’m sorry,” Jonas wheezed. “I’m sorry.”  
“You fucking dickhead,” Eva continued, starting to cry again. Seeing this, Jonas tried to stop laughing.   
“Hey, I’m sorry, okay?” he wheezed. Eva was having none of it. She shoved him away from he tried to hug her, instead turning to Vilde and burying her face in her shoulder. Vilde held her tight while she cried and stared at Jonas with a horrified look on her face.   
“Dude, what the hell?” Mahdi was exclaiming, shoving Magnus’s shoulder roughly. Chris had turned to Kasper.   
“When the fuck did you even get here? Are you crazy? Scaring us like that?” she asked, flailing her arms around.   
Isak had nothing to say. He just leaned his head on Even’s chest and tried to catch his breath.   
“Calm down,” Jonas urged everyone. Noora was almost crying, too. “It was just a joke.”  
“It wasn’t a very funny one!” Eva shouted, pulling her tear-ridden face away from Vilde for a second.   
“Yeah, what the fuck, man?” Mahdi spat. “That was way too far.”  
“Chill, we thought it would be funny!” Magnus butted in.   
“Well it wasn’t,” Noora snapped. “How did you even pull it off, anyway?”   
“After Chris told us the story of how she pranked you guys last year, me and Mags were in our room, and we wanted to see if we could do one better. So we texted Kasper to see if he could come and turn the lights out for us. We had Mags tell his whole ghost story and then I texted Kasper to cut the lights. He was in the basement.”  
“That was you in the basement?” Eva exclaimed, walking to him. “Fuck! Fuck, I almost had a heart attack.”  
“You saw him?” Jonas asked.   
“Yes! Yes, I saw him! I went down for more candles and I thought there was a fucking murderer in the basement!”  
“Oh. Shit, I’m sorry,” Jonas apologized, sounding more sincere now. “Anyway, then we went to go get high. When Mahdi went back in, we snuck in and took all the candles. We had Kasper fix the lights and then come up from the basement and say the shit Mags said after we locked the door.”  
“Fuck, bro,” Isak finally said. “That wasn’t cool. Fuck.”  
“You made me fucking cry!” Eva yelled, pushing back her hair.   
“We didn’t mean to scare you so bad,” Magnus said seriously. “We thought it’d be funny.”  
“Ugh, fuck,” Noora groaned. “My heart is beating so fast.” Sana held the bridge of her nose.   
“I’m shaking,” she declared.  
Only Even hadn’t spoken. Instead of saying something, he started to laugh. It began quietly, bubbling up from his stomach until it was a loud, booming laugh that made his whole face crinkle. Isak pulled away and looked up at him.   
“Fuck,” Even sighed, “I almost peed myself.”  
At this, Isak let out an unexpected giggle. And then he was laughing, too. Slowly, the room filled with relieved laughter.   
“”You three are kicked out,” Eva said to the perpetrators, but she was smiling now, even though her face was still tacky with tears.   
“That was cruel, dude,” Mahdi chuckled, playfully punching Magnus’s shoulder. The blond boy grabbed him in a headlock.   
“Let’s watch a movie or something,” Jonas suggested. Everyone glared at him.   
“Okay, but you don’t get to chose,” Eva agreed.   
They ended up watching Rapunzel.   
Jonas didn’t dare complain.


	30. Chapter thirty

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Almost 2k of Isak being sleepy... this barely counts as a cabin chapter... honestly I'm just stretching out the cabin sequence... anyway Isak is the sleepiest bean alive, to which I relate because I've been in pajamas actually all day.

Chapter thirty  
“You were so brave today,” Isak mumbled into Even’s neck. The older boy smiled and patted down his hair.   
“I wasn’t. I was fucking terrified,” he laughed.  
“No, you were brave. Just cuz you were scared doesn’t mean you weren’t brave.”   
Isak was lying half on top of Even, legs slotted between his. “Hi,” he said, looking up at him with a smile.   
Laughing, Even replied, “Hi. It’s been a while.”  
Isak nodded and pressed his face further into Even’s collar bone.  
“I thought you were gonna kill somebody,” he muttered.   
“Yeah? You think I’m that tough?”   
“Mmhmm,” Isak sighed, placing a light kiss to Even’s shoulder.   
Chuckling, Even rubbed Isak’s arm. “So, you and Eva are really close, aren’t you?” he asked suddenly.   
Looking up at him, Isak scrunched his brow. “Ja? Why?”  
“The way you calmed her down today… I don’t know, I didn’t know you two were that close.”  
Isak let out a sigh. “Well, when she first moved to Oslo, she immediately became friends with Ingrid and Sara. And, then, when Ingrid and Jonas started dating, we were both kind of the third wheel. So we got close. We started spending a lot of time together. But then she and Jonas started dating and… blah blah blah, it all went down hill. You know the story. Anyway, since then we’ve just been trying to rebuild our relationship.”  
Even nodded solemnly. “How’re things going between her and Vilde?” he asked.   
“Good,” Isak replied. “Or, well… they had a fight a little while ago about something, but… yeah, I think it’s good.”  
“That’s good,” Even affirmed. Isak nodded.   
“But enough about them,” he said, propping his face up close to Even’s. “Let’s talk about something else.”  
“Something like what?” Even laughed.   
Isak rolled his eyes. “I dunno,” he said. “Cuddling.”  
“Okay, what’s your favorite thing about cuddling?”  
“Hmm,” Isak hummed. “Touching.”  
Even laughed. “Isn’t that the whole premise of cuddling? That’s like saying your favorite thing about eating is getting nourishment.”  
“No, seriously,” Isak laughed. “When I was living with my parents it was always so hectic, then living with Eskild I never, like… cuddled with him, and I was so self-conscience about acting too ‘gay’ around my friends that I just, like… that day we spent in my bed after we kissed, I realized that was like the first time I’d been touched by somebody else in ages.”  
He couldn’t even finish his sentence without giggling because Even’s grip had gotten increasingly tight around him as he spoke and now the older boy was peppering his face in kisses. “Stop,” he laughed.   
“No. My little touch-starved boy, my sweet angel.”  
“I’m not starved, Even,” Isak protested, squirming.   
“Hopefully not anymore,” Even exclaimed. “But you were! And that is not alright!”  
“It’s fiinne,” Isak whined.   
“No,” Even insisted, rolling them slightly on their sides and hugging Isak so tight the younger boy had some trouble breathing. “You’re never going to feel that way again.”  
Letting out a mock-frustrated sigh into Even’s chest, Isak said, “What can I do to pacify you?”  
“Let me love you,” Even replied, tucking his chin on the top of Isak’s head. The smaller boy giggled and silently agreed. 

When they woke up the next morning, it was early. Soft light filtered into the room.   
“Halla,” Even muttered, brushing back some of Isak’s curls. They’d woken at about the same time, surprisingly. Isak smiled up at him with tired eyes.   
“Halla,” Isak said back, scooching up to press his lips to the corner of Even’s mouth.   
Even smiled and snuggled closer to Isak. “How’re you, sweetie?”  
“Good.”  
“Slept okay?”  
“Yeah. What about you?” Isak mumbled, eyes drifting shut again.  
“I’m good, too, sleepyhead,” Even laughed.  
“It’s not my fault I woke up at this ungodly hour.”  
“Of course not, baby,” Even mused. “Do you want to head downstairs? I’m starved.”  
“Did we forget to eat dinner last night?” Isak asked, squinting up at the older boy. Even chuckled.   
“I think so, in all the confusion.”  
Isak groaned. “Mags and Jonas are such dickheads,” he muttered.   
“I thought it was a little funny. Anyway, come on. I’ll make you something to eat.”  
Isak sighed and allowed himself to be dragged out of bed.   
They headed downstairs, Isak trailing behind Even, fingers loosely threaded together.   
“What do you want to eat?” asked Even.   
“Um, whatever,” Isak mumbled as they reached the kitchen. He latched his arms around Even’s waist and smushed his face into the taller boy’s back.   
“Okay, I’ll make eggs,” Even concluded. He tried to walk to the fridge but Isak was holding on tight. “If you’re gonna hold onto me like this, you better move with me.”  
Sighing, Isak reluctantly shuffled to the fridge and watched over his shoulder as Even got out a carton of eggs.   
They made their way to the stove and Even started on the eggs. “Serenade me,” he said lightly, cracking the eggs into a hot pan.   
Even always made jokey requests like these- “Rap for me, baby, it turns me on!” “Sing me a few verses of Gabrielle before bed, Issy, so I can sleep better.”- but Isak always rolled his head with a “Nei,” or a “You big loser.”  
This time, however, Isak was half asleep and warm. He wasn’t really thinking, and a memory of his mother singing to him when he was younger popper into his head so suddenly that, when his mouth opened and words poured out, he hadn’t even realized what had happened.   
“Some say love,” he mumbled into Even’s shirt. His voice was raspy and in no way impressive, but Even froze and listened as if his life depended on it. “It is a river… that drowns… the tender reed.”  
Placing the eggs down, Even stared at Isak’s hands around his waist. “Some say love… it is a razor… that leaves… your soul to bleed.  
“Some say love… it is a hunger… and endless aching need.  
“I say love… it is a flower… and you… its only seed.”  
He couldn’t remember the rest of the words, so he just hummed the melody for a few more seconds before fizzling out. Even shimmied around.  
“Hey,” he said, looking down at a dazed Isak who still had his eyes half closed. “Where did that come from?”  
Shrugging, Isak tilted up his chin for a kiss. Even complied, smiling the whole time.   
“You’re so lovely,” he sighed into the younger boy’s mouth.   
Isak snorted. “You’re not the only one who can sing, you old perv.”  
This made Even let out a bark of surprised laughter. “Only you would willingly choose to ruin a sweet moment with sass and sarcasm.”  
Isak shrugged. He turned Even back around. “Make breakfast, I’m dying here.”  
Still smiling, the taller boy complied. Isak settled back into his koala hug. It was so warm there, between them.

Sana came down with Noora a while later. They were amused to see Even, still meticulously preparing the eggs, with Isak clinging to his back.   
“Halla, boys,” Sana said, eyes incredulous.   
“Shh,” Even said gently. “He’s asleep.”  
Sana stared between Noora, Isak and Even. “You’re joking?” she asked hopefully.   
Laughing quietly, Even shook his head. “Nope.”  
“He can’t be asleep. He’s standing,” Sana argued.   
“Do you wanna ask him?” Even challenged playfully. Sana rolled her eyes. She looked to Noora.   
“He’s not asleep, right?”  
Raising her eyebrows, Noora replied, “You underestimate him. This happens more than you think.”  
“How can one fall asleep on another person?” Sana asked, eyes narrow.   
“Ask Isak,” Noora shrugged.   
“But isn’t he uncomfortable? He’s standing.”  
“Sana, I think you missed something along the way,” Noora said, hopping up on the counter. “Isak is literally always on Even. To him, it’s the most comfortable place in the world.”  
Sana huffed, but Even, still facing away from them, smiled. He finished up the eggs and scraped them onto a plate and then gently unclasped Isak’s hands from his waist and wiggled to face the smaller boy.   
“Hey,” Even said, holding Isak upright by the hips. The younger boy slowly blinked open his eyes, a confused, grumpy look on his face.   
“Hi,” he grumbled after a moment. Even looked down at him fondly.   
“You fell asleep.”  
“Mmhmm,” Isak sighed, looking around disgruntledly.   
“I made breakfast.”  
“Mmhmm.”  
Chuckling, Even pressed a kiss to Isak’s forehead. “Is that all you’re capable of saying?”  
“Mmhmm.”  
Isak stared at Even for a few moments before letting out a tiger yawn- something that made Even want to melt into a puddle right there on the floor- and then popping onto his toes to rub his nose against Even’s. “Good morning,” he said softly.   
“Good morning, baby.”  
“Isak?”   
Whipping his head around so fast you’d think it might snap, Isak finally noticed the two girls who had joined them. He stared at Sana grouchily.   
“Ja?”  
“Can you explain to me how you fall asleep standing? I still can’t seem to understand it.”  
Rolling his eyes, Isak turned back around and buried his face in Even’s chest. “Shut up,” he mumbled. “He happens to be a very comfortable pillow.”  
Even chuckled before reminding the younger boy that their eggs were getting cold. Isak reluctantly sat down at the table, moodily eating his breakfast while Even charmingly lead a conversation with the girls. After they were done, Isak cleared his plate and sulked around the kitchen while Even continued to talk with Noora and Sana.   
“I wanna shower,” he whined quietly while the girls were distracted. Even looked at him with amused confusion.   
“Okay?”  
Oh. Oh yeah. Showering alone was an option. Isak blushed, realizing he hadn’t thought about that.   
“But- but-” he stuttered. Even stared at him, making Isak pout.   
“Do you want me to shower with you, baby?” the older boy asked softly.   
Isak begrudgingly nodded, making Even chuckled.   
“Then all you have to do is ask, silly.”  
“Will you shower with me, Even?” Isak muttered. The taller boy stood and kissed the crown of his head.   
“Of course.”

They were in the shower soon enough. Even honestly couldn’t believe that Isak was trying to sleep on him again, especially in such a slippery place, and yet.   
“Baby, come on,” he said, shaking Isak’s shoulders.   
“But you’re so comfy,” the smaller boy argued.  
“But you’ll fall and hit your head,” Even argued back.   
Huffing, Isak pulled away and grabbed the bar of soap. “Here,” Even intervened, taking it. He got his hands nice and foamy before rubbing them over Isak’s smaller body.   
“Mm,” Isak sighed contentedly.   
They stayed wrapped up in each other under the hot water until Even reminded Isak that somebody else probably wanted to shower and persuaded him to get out. Once they returned to their room, Isak collapsed into bed immediately.   
“We’ve been awake for two hours,” Even reminded him.   
“Two hours too long,” the younger boy grumbled.   
Even sat down beside him and gently rubbed his back. “Are you just eternally sleepy?”  
“Yes,” Isak replied.   
Chuckling, Even placed a kiss between his shoulder blades. “You’re such a cutie.”  
Opening one eye to glare at him, Isak said nothing. 

In ten minutes, they were both asleep again.


	31. Chapter thirty-one

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Even and Isak get up (again) and go for a bike ride with squad, and then a game of two truths and a lie is played

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry if it feels like I write about Vilde a lot or am obsessed with Vilde, it's just that I write about Vilde a lot and am obsessed with Vilde so... :)

Chapter 31  
“Dudes, get up.”  
Mahdi tossed a pillow at the cuddly couple. By this point everyone was awake and they were planning on going for a bike ride.   
“Mm, no,” Isak muttered, hiding his face in the pillow.   
“Mm, yes,” Mahdi teased. “We’re gonna go out on our bikes.”  
“Did everyone bring bikes?” Even asked, sitting up and smoothing back his hair.   
“No, but there’s a place nearby that rents them out.”  
“Ah.”  
The older boy got out of bed, pulling a hoodie over his tshirt. Isak was still buried in the blankets.   
“Okay, we’re all gonna head out soon, so if you wanna grab breakfast…”  
“We already ate,” Even said.   
Mahdi raised his eyebrows. “You just woke up.”  
“For the second time,” laughed the blond boy.   
“Let me guess, Isak refused to get up.”  
“I didn’t refuse,” Isak grumbled, “I did get up. And then I went back to bed.”  
Mahdi chuckled before shutting the door again. Even grabbed Isak’s arm and pulled him up off of the bed.   
“Neiii,” he whined, flopping forward.   
“You cannot stay in bed all day,” Even laughed.   
Isak gave him a challenging look, to which Even raised his eyebrows. Groaning, the younger boy surrendered and got up. He was already dressed so he just pulled a snapback over his unruly hair and trotted down the stairs, giving Even the middle finger as he left.   
“Look who it is!” Sana exclaimed upon seeing him.   
Isak rolled his eyes.   
“Sana, I don’t fucking know why you think everything is so weird all the time when you literally tried to pull Narcos shit on me, but-” he started to sputter, but she waved him off.   
“Calm down, lover boy, it was actually kind of cute.”  
Well, that shut Isak right up. He closed his mouth, blushing, and blinked a few times, making Sana smirk.   
“I have no idea what all that’s about,” Jonas said to the group- all of whom, Isak realized, were staring at him- “but, as I was saying, we’re gonna head to the rental place first, and then there’s this super cool trail all through the mountains and into these cool caves, so I think it’d be sick to head out that way.”  
Everyone nodded, voicing their agreement that it sounded really cool.   
“Alright, so is everyone ready?” the dark haired boy asked.  
The group nodded and started to gather their shoes when Even came down. He got updated on the plan by Vilde.   
By the time the gang was all walking down to the rental place, Isak had fully woken up. He was chilling with Magnus and Mahdi towards the middle of the group. Vilde and Eva was just behind them, with Jonas and Even trailing. Sana, Noora and Chris were in the front. Noora was leading, as usual, since she was the only one who could use a map in any way, shape, or form.   
As soon as they got to the place, everyone grabbed the first bike they saw and paid the cashier.   
“Okayyyy,” Jonas drawled, hopping on the navy blue one he’d gotten, “you guys ready?”  
Everyone set situated and then they set off.   
“Hey, bro,” Isak said, riding up behind Jonas. Jonas glanced over his shoulder at him.   
“What’s up?” he asked.   
“Nothing much. You’re probably psyched to see these caves.”  
Jonas was big into “geography and shit” according to Isak. “Yeah,” he said, “Real psyched.”   
The caves were notorious for being deep and tunnelly. Isak was excited to check them out, too.  
“Are you having fun?” asked Isak.  
“On the trip? Yeah, of course. Although, rooming with Maggie is quite the adventure.”  
Isak laughed, making his bike swerve.   
“Serr,” Jonas chuckled. “He wants to talk about personal shit, like, every night.”   
“Don’t get too close,” Isak warned. “He’ll propose.”  
The two boys rolled their eyes at each other.   
“How about you?” Jonas asked. “Are you having fun?”  
“Yeah!” Isak exclaimed. “Except for when you decided to be a fucking asshole.”  
“Fuck,” Jonas laughed, “I didn’t mean for it to go that far.”   
“Yeah. I wasn’t that scared, anyway.”  
Jonas gave him an incredulous look, making Isak smile.   
“Serr, though. Compared to Eva and Vilde, I was cool as fuck.”  
“I didn’t mean for Eva to cry,” Jonas groaned. “I hate when she cries.”  
Isak laughed through his nose but then got serious. “You’re okay, right? With Eva?”  
“Hmm? Yeah. I mean, it’s a little weird seeing her with her girlfriend but… she’s helped me with a lot of girl stuff, so… it’s all good.”  
Isak nodded. “Good.”  
“And you? You’re good?”  
“Yeah. I’m great.”  
“That’s great.”

They got to the caves a while later. They really were cool. Everyone had a great time exploring them, but, by the bike ride and walk back, the whole group was pretty tired. They all settled around the living room with some beer and wine and decided to play a game of two truths and a lie.   
“Okay, I’ll go first,” Eva volunteered. “Um… one time I drunk called my mom to wish her a happy birthday because I’d convinced myself it was her birthday for some reason. Another time I drunk called Ruth from school to tell her how much I appreciate her helping me in math, and I’ve broken three bones.”  
Everyone mulled this over.   
“Your mom?” guessed Jonas after a moment. Eva shook her head with a thin lipped smile.   
“Ruth?” asked Vilde. Again, Eva shook her head.   
“Ha! Serr? You’ve drunk called them both?” laughed Jonas.   
“They’re just two of many,” Eva replied, grinning.   
“How did you get out of the thing with your mom?” asked Even.   
Biting on her lower lip, Eva replied, “As soon as she said it wasn’t her birthday I was like ‘Wait, isn’t this Noora?’ and she was like, ‘... honey, no.’ So I tried to play it off but she knew. She definitely knew.”  
Everyone chuckled. “Wait,” Isak butted in, “how many bones have you broken?”  
“None,” Eva admitted.   
“You really need to stop drunk calling people,” Magnus said, mouth slightly ajar. Eva glared at him.   
Sana was sitting next to Eva, so she went next. “Hmm… I have never lost a bet, I… I once spent an entire afternoon alone with Eskild, and there is one of you in this room I would take to war before anyone else.”  
“Eskild,” Noora assumed. Her eyebrows shot up into her hairline when Sana smiled and shook her head. “Why did you spend an afternoon with Eskild?” she asked.   
“I went over to drop something off for Isak,” at this, the blond boy, who’d only half been paying attention, snapped his head towards her, “but he wasn’t home, and neither were you. Eskild let me in and desperately needed help doing his eyeliner for some club or something. Next thing you know I’d done his whole face.”   
“Of course,” Noora smirked, rolling her eyes. “Did he like it?”  
Sana made an offended face. “Ja? He adored it.”  
“Okay, okay, I call bullshit on the never lost a bet,” Chris said, cutting their conversation off.   
“You’re right,” Sana told her. “Even I’m not that brilliant.”  
Everyone chuckled. “Wait, so who the fuck would you take to war?” asked Mahdi. Sana pursed her lips and let out a sigh before turning to Vilde. The blonde stared at her patiently.   
“What?” she asked after a moment had passed.   
“I think it’s you, babe,” Eva said quietly. Vilde blushed bright pink.   
“What?” she repeated, even more confused this time. “You’d take me to war, Sana?” She stared at the other girl as if trying to figure out where Sana had gotten confused.   
“Um, yeah? I’ve said it before,” Sana shrugged. She gave Noora a knowing glance. “I think you’re secretly the coolest of us all,” she mock-whispered after a moment. Vilde was staring at her with the widest eyes.   
“Oh!” she squeaked. “Oh, um…”  
Sana rolled her eyes. “You don’t need to go into cardiac arrest,” she assured Vilde, putting one hand on her shoulder.  
“Well…” Vilde trailed, biting her lower lip. “I think you’re really cool, too, Sana.”  
Sana snorted lightly. “Thanks,” she said with only a little sarcasm.   
It was Chris’s turn. “I used to play soccer, erm, I have my bellybutton pierced and my mother is Polish.”  
“Belly button,” Eva said immediately.   
“Fuck,” Chris swore, “how did you know?”  
“Chris, we’ve all seen you change,” Noora replied for her, amused.   
Magnus blushed. “Well, not all of us,” he stuttered. Everyone else just rolled their eyes.   
“I don’t think she was referring to the guys, Mags,” Mahdi said, patting his back.   
Even chuckled. The game had gotten to him and so he leaned back on his palms and hummed. “So… once I rode my bike halfway across town in the rain just to get some sandwiches from this place I really like, one time I started crying when I was really little because I woke up and I could hear my parents having sex and I thought my dad was hitting my mom, and one time I broke into somebody’s house to go swimming.”  
With the last one, he gave Isak a sneaky look, and the smaller boy blushed and bit down on his smile. “The pool one?” asked Magnus, and Even shook his head.   
“The sandwiches?” asked Mahdi.   
“Yeah,” Even laughed, still staring at Isak.   
“Wait, so you heard your parents having sex?” asked Jonas. Even chuckled.  
“I did. And I have never forgotten it.”  
“Dude, that’s, like, traumatic,” said Magnus, wide-eyed.   
“It was,” Even agreed.   
“Okay, okay, my turn,” Mahdi cut in. “I’ve got good ones. So,” he rubbed his hands together dramatically, “I was, like, addicted to club penguin for, six months when I was eight. I had literally a hundred puffles. Second, I won a hotdog eating contest when I was eleven, and, last, I have an entire Froid book practically memorized because I convinced myself the summer before secondary school that it would be really useful.”  
“Hmm… the club penguin thing?” asked Jonas.   
“No,” Mahdi replied. “Sadly.”  
“The Froid book,” said Magnus.   
“Nope. Maggie, you should know that. I’ve literally used that against you.”  
Magnus rolled my eyes. “Like I know when you’re quoting Froid.”  
“So you never won a hotdog eating contest?” asked Isak.  
Mahdi laughed. “No.”  
“Did the book end up being useful?” Even asked, smiling.   
“Yeah,” Mahdi said, “it’s actually really good information to have.”  
Everyone nodded. The game reached Isak. “So… number one, I broke up with Sara using the excuse that my dad was upset that my grades were dropping. Number two, the real reason was because I was hooking up with Penetrator Chris. Three, once went three days without sleeping.”  
“The Sara one?” Eva asked tentatively.   
Isak shook his head, smiling.   
“Sleeping?” Noora asked. Again, Isak said no.   
Eva let out a relieved breath. “Chris, then?” she asked.   
“I can’t believe you guys thought I had a thing with that douche!” Isak exclaimed, looking accusingly at Eva and Noora. Both girls blushed.   
“How did you even find out?” asked Eva. Isak shot a look to Even, who shot a look to Noora. “Noora?” Eva exclaimed. “You leaked?”  
“He was asking about why Isak moved in with us and I had to explain why Eskild recognized him!” the blonde defended.   
“Wait, what?” asked Jonas.   
Noora huffed. “Eskild only took Isak in because he recognized him as our friend because Eva and I made him instagram stalk Isak because we thought he was gay and hooking up with P Chris,” she mumbled, all her words coming out quick.   
Isak shook his head. “You guys are the worst,” he laughed.   
“Why did you think he was hooking up with P Chris?” Mahdi squaked.   
Noora smiled and stuck her tongue between her teeth. “I saw them together in a car and then they were exchanging hand signals!”  
“We were just talking about the stupid Yakuza fights!” Isak explained.   
“Okay, whatever,” Noora laughed. “How were we supposed to know that?”  
“Well you certainly didn’t have to assume-”  
“We were just speculating!” Eva defended.   
“When did you go three days without sleeping?” asked Even. They were all talking over each other.  
“Alright!” Magnus shouted over the noise. Everyone settled down. “Alright, so I have never blacked out drunk, I hate seafood, and I know how to drive.”  
“Drive,” Jonas said immediately. Magnus grinned and shook his head, making the dark haired boy raise his eyebrows. “Serr?” he asked.  
“Yeah! I’m pretty good, too.”  
“Okay, so the drunk one,” Isak butted in.   
“Nope,” Magnus replied, popping the p.   
“You like seafood?” asked Mahdi.   
“Love it,” Magnus said enthusiastically. “Seafood is great.”  
“Seafood is great,” Even agreed solemnly.   
It was Jonas’s turn. “Okay,” he said, “um… I once fell off my bike trying to go down a hill and ended up rolling all the way into a lake, my mom once gave me a buzz cut, and I’ve had my dog since I was seven. Isak, you’re not allowed to guess.”  
Isak grinned at him.   
“The buzz cut?” Eva guessed, half-hopefully. Jonas begrudgingly shook his head. “Fuck, do you have pictures?” the girl asked.   
“You’ll never see them,” Jonas told her.   
He caught Isak just as he finished mouthing, “You’ll probably see them.”  
“Dude,” Jonas laughed, “those are confidential files.”  
“You scared the shit out of everybody,” Isak argued. “You deserve hell.” And then he giggled. “And, man, did you look like hell.”  
“Shut up,” Jonas groaned, tossing a pillow at him. Isak swatted it away.   
“So… the lake one?” guessed Mahdi. Jonas nodded.   
“I did fall off my bike down a hill but I just landed in a ditch.”  
The gang chuckled. It had come back around to the girls. Noora considered what she wanted to say.   
“I have lived in five different countries,” she said, “I… I used to have hair down to my waist, and… I have walked in on Eskild… getting some… four times in total.”  
“Ew, hopefully Eskild,” Eva laughed.  
Noora shook her head. “Unfortunately. I have seen that man’s ass too many times.”  
“Don’t you knock?!” Chris exclaimed.  
“Yes! Sometimes he doesn’t hear me and doesn’t respond and he always blasts music, so I just go in. Then one time he said ‘come in,’ because he thought it was the stupid guy he was fucking coming back from the kitchen, so I walk in and he’s sprawled out on the bed wearing nothing but a fucking ‘sexy fireman’ costume than included a fire hydrant on a pair of panties that had a hole to represent the water shooting out, but instead of water it was-”  
“Stop!” Vilde squealed, burying her face in Eva’s shoulder.   
Everyone else was groaning and laughing, too. Even, quite loudly, exclaimed, “Kinky!”  
“So the countries, right?” asked Chris after the squad settled down. Noora nodded.   
“Only three,” she said.   
Vilde was the last to go. “I don’t know what to say…” she trailed, concentrating hard. “Oh! Um, I know how to tie a cherry stem with my tongue… I thought fairies were real until I was twelve, and… I won the regional award for best cake at a contest when I was thirteen.”   
“The cake,” Noora said immediately. Vilde shook her head, making everyone gape.   
“Wait, serr?” Eva said after a moment.  
Vilde nodded. “Ja! It was really good.”  
“Why’d you stop competing?” asked Sana.   
Looking down, Vilde shrugged. “I didn’t like… well, I stopped baking for a while. And when I started again, I don’t know… I never liked all the pressure.”  
Eva ran her thumb over Vilde’s knuckles and looked at her fondly. “The cherry stem?” she asked.   
Smiling at her, Vilde nodded.  
They decided not to play another round- it was getting late and everyone was hungry. So they had dinner and then disappeared smaller bunches.   
Upstairs, Isak was setting up a movie while Even got into his pajamas. “Okayyy…” he trailed, scrolling through Netflix, “what are you in the mood for?”  
Coming over, Even pushed him back with a kiss. When they broke apart, he cocked his head down at the smaller boy. “Why on earth did you go three days without sleeping?”  
Huffing, Isak rolled his eyes. “Sleep is the cousin of death,” he reminded Even.   
The older boy raised his eyebrows. “Okay, but not visiting the cousin of death for three days is actual death.”  
Isak shrugged. “Sometime I just can’t sleep.”  
Frowning, Even gently moved some hair away from Isak’s face before leaning down to kiss him again.   
“Did you ever see a doctor about it?” he asked after pulling away.   
“Yeah, I saw the school doctor once, but she tried to send me to a therapist. I told her I wouldn’t do that, so she said I had to talk to somebody. That’s… that’s when I came out to Jonas,” he mumbled at the end.   
Even’s face softened. “What did she say exactly?” he asked.   
“She said… she said that every person is an island, and that the only way to form bridges to each other is with words. That if we don’t talk to each other,” his voice got quiet, “we’ll become lonely little islands.”  
Even dropped to lay beside him, gently laying his head on Isak’s chest. He gazed up at the smaller boy. “And now?” he asked. “Are you a lonely little island.”  
“Nei,” he laughed. “I’ve actually been trying to get a whole penninsula out to this big, dorky island I met a little while ago. So we can be really connected.”  
Even smiled. “You might not believe that, but I heard that the big, dorky island is trying to meet his little, grumpy island halfway on that.”  
“Yeah?” Isak asked, caressing Even’s cheek with his thumb.   
“Yeah. In fact, I think they’re already there.”  
Isak grinned before leaning down to kiss Even. They stayed staring at each other for a moment longer until Even suddenly pounced up on Isak, attacking him with kisses. Isak harrumphed but quickly pulled the older boy back to his mouth.


	32. Chapter thirty-two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The girl's try to prank Sana but Isak ends up on the receiving end... luckily Even is there to clean him up;);)  
> Warning: smut!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lol, I had to google "movies about tongues" for this chap, so please appriciate me

Chapter 32  
“Ha!” screamed Vilde as Isak turned the corner to walk into the kitchen. The girls were- or so they had claimed- making a cake. But, as soon as Isak walked into the room, he got a face full of chocolate batter. Stunned, he wiped his eyes before opening them to see four horrified and yet wildly amused girls. Eva had both hands over her mouth, but her eyes were crinkling with laughter. Noora’s jaw had dropped and she let out a shocked little giggle. Chris looked as if she’d just witnessed somebody give birth and Vilde- chocolate covered hand and all- looked absolutely paralyzed with fear.  
Sana walked up behind him. She took a disapproving look at the other four girls and shook her head. “I’m assuming that was meant for me?” she asked.   
“We’re sorry, Sana!” Eva exclaimed, still covering her smile with her hands.   
Isak, in shock, stared at her. “Sana?” he asked. “We’re sorry, Sana?!”  
“We’re sorry to you, too, Isak,” she laughed, looking only one third apologetic. She went in for a hug but the boy sputtered and pushed her away.   
“Nei, no hugging! You threw cake batter in my face!”  
“Well, technically Vilde did it!” Eva defended. Isak turned to the blonde.   
“Ja! Vilde! Can’t you tell the difference between me and Sana?” he asked incredulously, all cocked chin and wide eyes.   
Vilde looked terrified. “It was Noora’s idea!” she sputtered, blinking rapidly.   
“I don’t care whose idea it was!” Isak all but shouted. “Now I have to wash my face and my hair all over again! So thanks a lot, guys!”  
“Stop being so melodramatic, Isak,” sighed Sana.   
“Huh! Imagine if it was you! You would’ve burned the place down by now!” Isak yelled, turning to her. “Speaking of, that should have been you! Thanks for taking five million years to do whatever it is you were doing!”  
“I had no part in this childish plan, Einstein! It was supposed to be me, remember?” Sana asked, raising her eyebrows.   
Isak looked at all of them, mouth still open. “I- just- ugh! I guess I’ll go take another shower!”  
“We’re really sorry,” Vilde said, a worried frown pulling at her mouth.  
Isak rolled his eyes. “Good!” 

“Hey, baby, I thought you were going to…” Even lost track of his sentence when he looked up and saw the chocolate tornado entering their room. “Oh. Well then,” he said, grinning.  
“Don’t smile,” Isak spat. “The fucking girls thought I was Sana and- and- caked me!”  
“I can see,” Even said, still smirking- much to Isak’s annoyance. He crossed the room and leaned his head down to get a better look at Isak.   
“It’s not funny!” Isak sputtered, indignant.  
“No, it’s not,” agreed Even, smile growing wider. Isak was red in the face from frustration. “Want help cleaning up?”  
“It’s in my hair, Even,” the smaller boy all but whined. “I have to take another shower.”  
“I’m sure we can think of an easier way,” Even purred, gently pressing his mouth to Isak’s cheek, licking at the soft skin. Isak turned to jelly.  
“What are you doing?” he mumbled weakly, still trying to feign annoyance. He bit down on his bottom lip when Even pulled away with a loud sucking sound.  
“Cleaning you up, baby,” Even explained, placing another kiss along his jaw. He worked his tongue, clearing the area of chocolate.   
“You can’t just distract me like this,” Isak told him.   
Even, taking the challenge, grabbed him by the small of his back and pulled them flush to each other. He ground slightly into Isak’s hips as he licked along his other cheek. “Are you sure?” he asked after pulling away. Isak was flushed.  
“Mm,” he whimpered slightly. When Even started sucking and licking at the batter that had dripped down onto his neck, he let out a soft needy sound. “Fuck, Even,” he sighed.  
“Let’s sit down,” Even suggested, moving them to the bed. He layed Isak down. The smaller boy let himself whine as Even crawled over him, dipping low to drag his tongue along the rest of Isak’s sweet face. “Tastes good, baby.”  
“Let me taste,” Isak ordered, grabbing Even roughly by the back of the neck and bringing their mouths together. He arched his back slightly as Even sucked on his lower lip. His teeth grazed it, making Isak loose whatever reserve he’d had left.  
“Mmm, want you so bad,” Even told him, pulling away to tug his shirt over his head.   
“Yeah?” Isak asked, heart pounding. He wanted Even, too- God he wanted Even to fuck every ounce of sense out of him.  
“Yeah,” the older boy replied, starting to get rid of his pants. He hopped up and locked the door real quick before getting back in bed. “Wanted you all week.”  
“Me too,” Isak admitted, a little breathless as Even plunged towards him and starting sucking bruises along his hips. He shoved Isak’s shirt up and the smaller boy wiggled and took it off. Curling his fingers through Even’s hair, he let out a gasp when he felt the taller boy’s hand snake into his pants and grip his half-hard cock.   
“E-Even,” he stuttered.  
“What do you want?” Even asked as he pulled off Isak’s pants.   
“You, in me. Now,” Isak moaned.   
“Yes,” Even sighed, throwing Isak’s boxer’s across the room. “My good boy.”  
Isak squeezed shut his eyes as Even slowly circled his rim before sticking in one finger. “Fuck,” Isak cried, digging his nails into Even’s shoulders.   
“Hmm, you like that?” Even asked, flexing the finger.   
“Not enough,” Isak choked. He gasped and hissed out, “Yess,” when Even added two more fingers at once.  
“Is that enough now?” the older boy growled, jamming the fingers in and out.   
“Yes, yes,” Isak sobbed. “So good, Even.”  
Even held Isak down when he went to buck his hips. “Stay still,” he told him.   
Isak nodded. He whined when Even pulled out. “Nei,” he begged.   
“Do you want my cock or not?” Even asked, looking down at him. Biting his lower lip, Isak nodded. “Then stop being a brat.”  
The older boy reached into his suitcase and grabbed a condom, ripping it open. He poured lube over himself and then positioned himself at Isak’s hole.   
“Fuck,” Isak sighed as Even pushed in slowly. “N-not so fast.”  
They hadn’t fucked in a week, what with everything going on. Even listened and carefully eased the rest of the way in, pulling Isak closer by the hips. “Mmm,” the smaller boy groaned as the pain gave way to pleasure.  
“Can I move?” asked Even after a beat. Isak nodded. Slowly, Even started to thrust in and out of him.   
“Fuck, yes, yes,” Isak moaned, arching his back.  
“Everyone’s gonna hear you,” Even reminded him. He didn’t seem to care much, though, as he started slamming into Isak harder.   
“I- I can’t,” Isak choked, trying to quiet down. Seeing this, Even put two hands over his mouth, reminiscent of the time they’d fucked when Isak’s dad was in the other room.   
“You like that, baby?” Even asked, sucking on Isak’s chest.   
Isak nodded. He whimpered when Even hit his sweet spot hard. He knew he was going to be bruised everywhere be this evening but who fucking cared?  
Even hiked Isak up closer to him, angling them so that he went even deeper. “Mmm,” Isak moaned into his hand, loud and needy like Even liked.   
“I’m close, baby,” he told Isak. The smaller boy nodded, tears in his eyes.   
Even ran his fingers along Isak’s hips. “You’re so pretty,” he choked before releasing into the smaller boy.   
“Mm, mm, mm,” Isak tried to cry. Even held him tight as he filled his ass with liquid heat.   
“Now, Issy, come on,” the older boy said as he rode out his orgasm. Trembling, Isak came hard onto Even’s chest and his stomach.   
As soon as they came down, Even peeled his hands away from Isak and kissed the corner of his mouth.   
Isak stared at him dazedly. “Even?” he said after a beat.   
“Yeah, baby?” Even replied fondly.   
“I still have batter in my hair.”  
Letting out a full faced laugh, Even kissed his forehead. “I guess we better get in the shower, then,” he said. 

After their shower, the boys headed downstairs. Luckily, everyone had been listening to music and so nobody seemed to have heard their shenanigans upstairs.  
“Hey,” Mahdi said as they came over. “We were just about to watch a movie.”  
“Sounds good,” said Even as he flopped down on the couch. Isak was trying to hide his slightly noticeable bowlegged walk as he moved to sit beside him.  
“Oh, hi…” Eva trailed nervously when she and the other girls walked in from the kitchen. Isak glared at them. “Are you still mad?”  
Vilde popped her head onto Eva’s shoulder looking at him with wide eyes. Noora was smirking behind them.   
“Yes,” Isak huffed.  
“At least you showered,” squeaked Vilde.   
“Don’t worry, girls,” Even said smugly. “I cleaned him up.” He licked his lips suggestively and wiggled his eyebrows as all the girls let out shocked laughter. Isak groaned and elbowed his ribs. “Woah,” Even laughed, “violent.”  
“Shut up,” Isak groaned, grabbing a pillow and hugging it to his chest.   
“What’s happening?” Magnus asked, looking confusedly between the girls and “Evak.”  
“We got a little bit of cake batter on Isak’s face,” Chris began, but Isak sputtered and cut her off.   
“A little bit?! They attacked me! They intentionally splattered me with an entire handful of batter!”  
Mahdi, Jonas and Magnus stared at the girls for confirmation. Eva shrugged. “We thought it was Sana.”  
“Anyway,” Chris said in English, “then Isak went upstairs and got a little… help cleaning up.”  
Mahdi and Jonas laughed, making Isak groan again. “Wait, so Even, like, washed you?” Magnus asked, looking around with drawn brows.   
“I think he gave him a cat bath,” Mahdi replied, sticking his tongue out towards Magnus, who turned a bright shade of red.   
“Serr?” he asked Even, who smiled with his mouth closed. “Ha!” the blond boy laughed. “Dude, that is so sick! That’s awesome! And you call me the catfucker!”  
“Cats had nothing to do with it, now can we please move on?” Isak begged in frustration.   
Everyone settled down. “Okay, so what movie do you guys wanna watch?” asked Mahdi.   
“I know a good one about saving dying languages,” Jonas offered, grinning. “I think Isak would like it.”  
Isak narrowed his eyes at the dark haired boy. “Why?”  
“It’s called, ‘Tongues of Heaven.’”  
“Fine!” exclaimed Isak, throwing up his hands. “Alright! You all win!”  
The group laughed but settled in as they tried to seriously decide on what to watch. Isak huffed and pulled out his phone. A moment later, everyone got a notification. Jonas opened it and sprung up, running to Isak and beating over the head with a pillow.   
Everyone else laughed and cooed at the photo of a very young, near bald Jonas.   
“You asked for it!” Isak was giggling as Jonas hit him repeatedly. He stuck his tongue out at the dark haired boy. “Do you like my tongue now?”   
“Fuck you,” Jonas laughed. 

By the time the movie and the cake were done, Isak was sleepy. He was resting his head on Even’s shoulder and had little will to move.  
“I don’t wanna get up,” he sighed when Even shifted. He certainly did not expect to be thrown over the older boy’s shoulder like a sack of potatoes. “Even?!” he cried.   
Mahdi and Magnus, the only two left in the room, cheered as Even marched Isak towards the staircase. “You said you didn’t wanna get up,” Even said playfully. Isak rolled his eyes and huffed.   
“Don’t have too much fun!” shouted Magnus.   
“Even, I brought some chocolate sauce if you guys want it!” Mahdi added on, earning a highfive from his blond friend. Isak groaned and hit his forehead into Even’s back.   
Sometimes he wondered why he had friends at all.


	33. Chapter thirty-three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The cabin trip wraps up, Isak runs into somebody from his past, Even is not doing so hot...

Chapter 33  
Everyone had their suitcases packed and lined up by the door. They were going to leave in a few hours, but they wanted to do one last fun thing before heading home.  
“Where do you want to go?” asked Jonas as he scrolled through his phone, looking for something to do in the area.  
“We could go down to the lake again,” Magnus suggested with a shrug.  
“Yeah, if there’s nothing new to do,” Mahdi added.  
“I heard there’s, like, a natural waterslide somewhere around here,” Vilde said nervously. Everyone turned to her. “Down by the lake,” she continued, “there’s, like, smooth rock that works just like a waterslide.”  
“That sounds dope!” Magnus exclaimed excitedly.  
“Is it safe?” Noora asked, furrowing her eyebrows.  
Vilde shrugged. “I think,” she said. “I mean, people do it a lot, so…”  
“Does that sound good to everyone?” asked Jonas. The squad nodded, and, so, about an hour later, they were all standing on top of hill, watching water shoot over rock into the lake below.  
“It’s… taller than I thought,” Vilde stated, staring at the slide.  
Magnus nodded, but Mahdi shrugged. “It looks cool.”  
“You go first,” Magnus said, nudging him.  
“What, just because I said it looks cool?” Mahdi asked. “I mean, I’ll go, but…”  
“But what?” asked Jonas, smiling at him. “You scared, bro?”  
“I’m not scared, but shouldn’t I go with somebody?” Mahdi replied, swatting at Jonas’s hand as he punched his shoulder.  
“Well, I’m not going with you,” the dark haired boy announced. “I’m not getting in that death trap until somebody proves its safeness.”  
“I’ll go,” volunteered Isak, wiggling away from Even, who’d been trying to distract him for the last several minutes.  
“Yeah, bro!” Mahdi exclaimed, slapping him a highfive. Isak rolled his eyes and pulled his shirt over his head so that he was only in his trunks.  
Mahdi copied him and soon they were both getting situated on the rock. It was quite hard not to start moving before they were ready, what with the water rushing by them and all.  
“Okay,” Mahdi said, pulling Isak tighter into the v of his legs, like every ride operator from every waterslide ever had taught them. “Ready?”  
The blond boy nodded, and they turned to Jonas, who shook his head and shoved Mahdi’s back. Vilde squealed and hid her eyes as they two boys went shooting down the slide, both of them cheering.  
“They’re going to die,” tisked Sana, shaking her head. Eva, Noora, and Jonas were watching them go down with huge eyes.  
“Are they dead?” Magnus asked after a beat. Even was quiet.  
“They’re not dead…” said Jonas. “They- oh, they just hit the lake. Now they’re… now they’re splashing each other.”  
He turned to the rest of the group. “Looks like its safe.”  
“You looked so nervous, Even,” Magnus said, poking the taller boy’s arm.  
Even grinned. “I wasn’t nervous, I’m never nervous,” he said.  
“Oh my god, you were totally scared he was gonna get hurt!” Eva exclaimed, bringing her hands to her face.  
Still smiling, Even rolled his eyes. “Don’t tell him,” he said, making the girls all squeak.  
“Evak for life,” Magnus sighed, making Even laugh. “Now, let’s go, dudes,” the smaller boy continued, grabbing Even’s arm and then Jonas’s.  
The three boys got situated and shot off, leaving the girls behind.  
As soon as they landed in the lake, they were attacked by Mahdi and Isak. Magnus sputtered and tried to shield himself as Isak wrestled him under the water. “I can’t breathe!” he complained.  
Isak rolled his eyes and swam around him a few times. “You’re talking, you can clearly breathe.”  
“Whatever,” Magnus grumbled, treading the water. Then he grinned.  
Isak narrowed his eyes. “What?” he just had time to ask before he felt a strong pair of arms wrap around his waist and drag him under.  
When he popped back up, he splashed Even mock-angrily. “Are you trying to kill me?”  
“I am,” Even laughed. But then Mahdi and Jonas were drenching him and everyone was splashing and laughing until suddenly a scream broke through the air.  
They looked up to see two bodies flying down the slide. “That must be Vilde,” Isak sighed, referring to the scream. 

By the time the train dropped everyone at the station, the whole gang was a little sad. The cabin had been really fun. Nobody wanted it to be over.  
“Well,” Vilde said, waving at her mom from across the room. “I had a great time with everyone.”  
They nodded. “I don’t know if I’ll see you guys before school,” continued to blonde, turning to face the boys, “so, if not, um… have a nice rest of summer.”  
“You too, Vilde,” Jonas said. Mahdi grinned at her, and Magnus wrapped her in a bear hug.  
One by one, the group dispersed, until it was just Even, Noora and Isak waiting for their bus.  
“That was really fun,” Even said into Isak’s hair.  
“Yeah,” the smaller boy agreed.  
“I love your friends.”  
“Our friends,” Isak reminded him, earning a smile and a kiss. Even gripped the back if his neck and pressed his tongue to Isak’s mouth, making the smaller boy squirm. “Hey,” he said, pulling away with confused eyes. “We’re in public.”  
“I know,” Even replied, creeping his hand further up Isak’s thigh.  
“Stop,” Isak said, slightly harsher now. His confusion slowly ebbed away to concern. “Are you okay?”  
“Yeah?” Even assured him with an incredulous head shake. “I’m fine. I just love you.”  
“Hey, the bus is here, guys,” Noora said, putting down her phone to look up at them.  
Isak gave Even a smirk and adjusted his collar before getting up and following her. 

A week had passed since the cabin trip, and things had mostly settled down. Everyone was unpacked and the kollektivet was back to normal. Eskild all but cried when Noora got back, lifting her up in a tight hug and making her squeal. He also hugged Even, whereas Isak barely got a glance.  
“Oh, calm down,” he said when the curly-haired boy called him out. “I love you, too.”  
Isak rolled his eyes as Eskild turned to Noora and, in English, said, “So needy.”  
The week went by fast. Isak was a little stressed about his mom, who hadn't been much better since the incident with Eskild. But Even was making him feel better. Sometimes Isak was overwhelmed with how loved Even made him feel. He'd been a little confused with how much Even wanted to fuck recently, but... it wasn't like he was necessarily objecting. He loved it. He just sometimes missed soft Even. But now the boys were going out for coffee. It was a nice, sunny day and they were both in a good mood, laughing and making jokes.  
“What are you gonna do when we get back?” Even asked, slinging his arm around Isak’s shoulders. The smaller boy shrugged.  
“I don’t know, whatever.”  
“Isak?”  
They both turned to see a young, thin woman approaching them. Isak shrugged Even’s arm off him and stared at her dazedly.  
“Hei,” he breathed.  
“Hei,” she said back, anxiety and love breaking over her face. Even looked back and forth between them but they couldn’t seem to take their eyes off of each other. She looked to be in her mid thirties. “Oh my god, you’re so… different.”  
Isak still had his mouth open as he stared at her. “Yeah,” he said after a moment, and then he seemed to snap out of it. “Oh, um, this is Even,” he said, gesturing to the older boy. “My… boyfriend.”  
The woman stared at Even. “...Oh,” she said. “How nice.”  
Sticking out his hand, Even asked, “How do you two… know each other?”  
The woman took his hand and shook it lightly. “I was… I was Isak’s nanny.”  
Isak narrowed his eyes at her. “Yeah,” he said after a beat. “This is Lea.”  
Even glanced between them. “That’s nice,” he said after a beat. Isak had never mentioned a nanny.  
“Isak,” Lea said, looking around like she had no idea how to say whatever she wanted to say. “I…”  
“Well, we have to go,” Isak said, grabbing Even’s hand.  
“Oh,” Lea said, face falling slightly. “Well… it was really nice to see you, Isak. If you ever want to call me… um, your…. your father has my number.”  
Isak swallowed thickly. He nodded once before turning and dragging Even away. “It was nice to meet you,” the older boy said quickly before they were too far away.  
Isak said nothing on the way back to the kollektivet. As soon as they walked in, however, he threw down his snapback and pushed back his hair, closing his eyes and taking a few deep breaths.  
“What was that?” Even asked softly, picking up the hat and hanging it on the coat rack.  
“Nothing,” Isak snapped, still breathing in and out shakily.  
“Isak,” Even said, gently removing the boy’s hands from his forehead and running his thumbs over his knuckles. “I didn’t even know you had a nanny,” he added after a beat.  
“She wasn’t my fucking nanny, what a stupid thing of her to say,” the smaller boy said angrily. Even blinked.  
“She… who was she, then?”  
“Nobody, Even, just someone I knew.”  
Even narrowed his eyes. “You know, this is a flight response.”  
“What?” Isak spat.  
“This. Emotional withdrawal are psychological disguises of flight. Withholding your feelings is the ego’s way of running away.”  
“So?!” Isak asked, brows drawing in.  
“So I don’t want you to run from me,” Even continued gently. Isak’s face softened just the slightest bit.  
“I’m not… it’s not you. I just,” he tried to breathe. Even noticed how rapidly his chest was rising and falling.  
“Hey. Count to ten with me,” he instructed, but Isak pulled his hands away and brought them to his head again, pacing. He was shaking, Even realized.  
“I just- god, I can’t think,” he stuttered.  
“Calm down,” Even begged. He watched as Isak looked around rapidly.  
“She was- she was sort of a housekeeper,” he managed after a moment. Isak shut his eyes and swallowed. His breath was coming shorter and shorter. “When we moved here, mama couldn’t- she couldn’t, um, keep up with everything. Dishes were piling up, laundry wasn't getting done. I did as much as I could, but- but it wasn’t like I could buy groceries or anything. So pappa hired- Lea. He hired her as a live-in housekeeper lady.”  
“Okay?” Even said, staring as Isak walked in loose circles.  
“It just- fuck, I can’t breathe,” Isak all but choked, slowly stopping and leaning against the counter.  
“Hey, count to ten. In and out,” Even tried again, walking to him and grabbing his hands. Isak took in shaky, too-fast breaths. He couldn’t get to ten. He could barely get to two or three.  
“Hey, boys!” Eskild exclaimed, walking in. Isak’s eyes got impossibly wider and he slammed his mouth into Even’s. The older boy could feel him trembling against him.  
“Geez, get a room,” muttered Eskild at their little display. Isak broke off and dragged Even towards their bedroom.  
As soon as they were inside, he raised his arms above his head and started to hyperventilate worse than before.  
“Sit with me,” Even said, dragging him to the bed. He wrapped Isak in his arms and breathed in and out, counting up and down from ten each time. Slowly, he felt Isak start to calm down. He felt his wet eyelashes against his neck as the smaller boy shifted. At least, he’d stopped shaking. “Do you want to talk about it?” he asked after a moment.  
“She lived with us for three years,” Isak mumbled. “She… she was, like, my best friend. Besides Jonas.”  
“Okay,” Even said, smoothing the back of his hair.  
“She, um- I wanted her to be my mom. We would go out shopping and people would see us and they’d assume she was my mom and- and I was so happy. I would see Jonas with his perfect family and then, later, Eva and her mom, when she was home, and they were so happy and normal and- I- I wanted that. I wanted that.”  
“That’s okay,” Even assured him, even though the idea of Isak wanting nothing to do with his mother still made ice creep into his stomach. That was when he was young, he reminded himself. You know he loves you.  
“It was so easy to pretend, with Lea. She was so beautiful and normal and, for one second, I wasn’t the kid whose mom was screaming at everyone in the dairy section that fucking lucifer had cursed the milk.”  
He was still talking too fast. “Breathe,” Even reminded him, rubbing his back.  
Isak took a few seconds before continuing. “Um, but… but then, one day, during first year, I came home… I came home and there was food everywhere. And the couch was on its back, and two vases and a lamp were broken. And mama was standing there, and pappa was… he was upstairs. I came home, and I asked what had happened, and mama turned around and threw this stupid little porcelain statue of Jesus at me. And it broke over my head and I started to cry and she did, too, and she kept saying, ‘I’m sorry, my love, I thought it was your father.’”  
“She threw a statue at you?”  
Isak nodded into Even’s shoulder. “And then dad came down, and Lea was behind him and they were holding suitcases and… he started screaming at her, ‘Look what you’ve done to our son!’ And I was crying, and I said, ‘Pappa, what’s going on?’ And then mama said, ‘He’s leaving us, Isak. Leaving us to be with that whore.’ And I looked at Lea and she couldn’t even look at me, and I didn’t know what to do. So I just went to pappa and I kept looking at him and I kept asking, ‘Are you leaving? Are you leaving?’ And I could feel myself getting sick and he just kept trying to push past me and he kept saying, ‘I’m sorry, Isak. I love you.’ But I wouldn’t leave, I was pulling at his suitcase and his coat and I started screaming at him, begging him not to go. But he pushed off of him and walked out. And I fell down and I watched as he and Lea walked out and she looked at me with these big, horrified eyes and she said, ‘I’m so sorry,’ before he slammed the door in my face. I’d gotten up and I was trying to run to them but he slammed the door and then I threw up all over it and mama was screaming. She was screaming that they were both going to die and I was hunched over by the door and I just… I just didn’t know what to do.”  
Even tightened his grip around the smaller boy. His voice had grown weak.  
“So I… I stood up and… and I started to clean. Mama was sobbing on her knees in the middle of the room, so I got her some sleeping pills and layed her down on the couch, after setting it up again. And I started to clean up, I swept up all the broken glass and cleaned all the food. And… and then I went upstairs and I… I went to sleep. And when I woke up, mama was making dinner. ‘What do you want to eat?’ she asked. And I just stared at her. And then I left. I ran to Jonas’s and I- I just lost it. He took me home. He lived with us, for a while. And once I’d calmed down a little, I went to mama and apologized for leaving. And she said, um… ‘It’s okay, my sweet boy. You will never leave. You are not like him. You are good.’ And she was holding me and she kept holding tighter until I could barely breathe, and she just, she said, ‘He’s going to burn in hell. Your father. He is going to burn.’ And I couldn’t help… I couldn’t help but think that I wasn’t all that different from him. That I’d tried to replace her with Lea, too.”  
“You are nothing like him,” Even snapped. He pulled back and held Isak at arm’s length. “Do you hear me? You will never be like him.”  
“But I did leave,” Isak said, avoiding Even’s eye. “It got too hard and I left.”  
“You left the house,” Even replied. “You didn’t leave her.”  
Even’s thoughts were too loud. He wanted to fucking kill Isak’s father. What had such a good, pure boy done to deserve any of this?  
“Their affair lasted two years but, after leaving, they barely made it a few months,” Isak said softly. I’m just… I didn’t expect to see her.”  
“I know,” Even replied, pressing a hot kiss to Isak’s mouth. The smaller boy pulled away and looked at him with slight surprise. “Let me make you feel better,” Even begged, getting on his knees to attack Isak’s mouth again. He could feel the tears on the smaller boy’s cheeks against his.  
“I-” Isak began when Even pulled away, but he didn’t have time to say anything else before the taller boy was on him again. Isak didn’t exactly feel like doing anything right now but he wasn’t opposed to it and he was sad and scared and he needed Even is whatever form he could get, so he, although still confused, let his boyfriend start to undress him. 

Once they were done, Isak asleep on Even’s chest, the older boy stared at the ceiling. He gently shifted from under his boyfriend’s weight and sat up, grabbing his phone. Looking at Isak’s gentle face, he opened his contact and texted the smaller boy, “Gone out. Don’t worry about me. I love you.”  
He pressed a kiss to the crown of his love’s head before ducking out of the room. Go, go, go, now, his mind told him as he threw on his shoes.  
“Even?” Noora asked, squinting at him from the couch. “Where are you going? It’s late.”  
“Isak forgot to pick up the cereal he likes,” Even said with a roll of his eyes. Noora stared at him a moment longer before shrugging and returning his attention to the TV show. Even walked out the door.  
Taking out his phone, he entered Isak’s dad’s address into his maps. He’d been there a few times before, but he didn’t want to get lost.  
It took a little over thirty minutes to jog there. He arrived out of breath and pounded on the door.  
“Yes?” the man who opened asked. He looked at the boy in front of him and drew in his eyebrows. “Even?”  
“You fucking son of a bitch,” Even huffed before ramming both hands into Isak’s father’s chest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fuck me again! Even I hate cliffhangers but I also hate myself so lol, who knows. I'm gonna be updating a little less frequently for the next week because I'm visiting my sister, so double fuck me.  
> Love you guys!


	34. Chapter thirty-four

Chapter 34  
Isak woke up in the dark and cold. He'd kicked off the blankets at some point earlier in the night. Instead of opening his eyes, he reached out for Even and went to nuzzle into his side. But nobody else was there.   
Flying up in bed, Isak looked around frantically. The room was empty. He grabbed his phone and clicked it on.   
Even: Gone out. Don't worry about me. I love you.  
There were two missed calls from his father, as well.   
Feeling his chest get tight, Isak dropped the phone and pushed back his hair. Even had texted him at eleven at night. The calls were from 11:45. Now it was two am.   
The teenager stood and pulled on a shirt and a pair of shorts. He tried to count to ten with each breath but his heart was racing a mile a minute. Grabbing his phone and keys, he ran out of their room. Noora was asleep on the couch, illuminated by the TV.   
"Noora," Isak said, shaking her. Slowly, the blonde blinked awake. She stared at him for a moment before dread spread over her face.   
"Is it Even?" she asked.   
Isak nodded. "He- he texted me at eleven that he'd left."  
"I saw him," Noora replied. "He said you wanted some special cereal for tomorrow... then I fell asleep. I'm sorry, Isak."  
"It's not your fault," Isak assured her. "I... I think he's at my dad's."  
"Why?" Noora asked. Isak looked away.   
"I don't know. But I gotta go, okay?"  
"Yeah," Noora replied, rubbing one eye. As the boy got up to walk away, she called, "Isak? Be careful, okay?"  
"Yeah. Thank you, Noora," he said. And then he walked out. 

"Isak," his dad said, opening the door. Isak was puffing out air too fast.   
"Where is he?" he asked.   
"On the couch," Isak's dad replied, stepping aside to let his son in. He crossed the foyer and entered the living room. Isak let out a sigh of relief, bringing his hands to his forehead, at the sight of Even asleep on the couch.   
"What happened?" he asked breathlessly.   
"He showed up near midnight, tried to jump me. Called me a son of a bitch and a horrible father. Made Nina cry. I had to wrestle him to the ground. After I finally calmed him down a little, Nina gave him a sandwich with some pills in it. Put him to sleep."   
Nina was his girlfriend. Isak hadn't known they were living together.   
"You slipped him pills? Is he okay?" Isak asked, walking to Even and looking him over.  
"Is he okay? Isak, he tried to fight me."  
Isak glared at his father. "Good for him."  
"What the hell is wrong with you?" his father spat. "Your boyfriend came here like a crazy person-"  
"Don't call him crazy," Isak warned, making his father narrow his eyes.  
"I... is something wrong with him?"  
There was a beat of silence. "He's bipolar," Isak replied after a moment.   
His father swore and looked to the ceiling. "Don't do this, Isak. It only ends badly. I know."  
"What do you know?" Isak snapped. "What in hell do you know about love or devotion or anything?"  
"I know that trying to love a crazy person only ends up hurting both of you," his father, replied. Isak turned to him.  
"Even is not crazy. He's bipolar. If you call him crazy again, I will make sure to teach you the difference in a way you'll never forget."  
"Are you really trying to threaten me, son?" his dad asked in exasperation.   
Just then, Nina came downstairs. "Honey... oh, hello. It's Isak, right?"  
"Yeah," Isak responded.  
"Isak was just here to pick up Even and take him back to where he's staying," his dad cut in.   
Isak looked at him strangely but before he could ask a question, Nina said, "How nice you're so close with your cousin."  
"My..." Isak trailed, staring at her. And then he was pushing back his hair and looking to the ceiling. "Are you fucking kidding me?"   
Nina looked at him with worried eyes.   
"Isak," his dad warned.   
"He's not my fucking cousin, he's my boyfriend. I'm sorry that my dad doesn't think you're a decent enough person to accept that, but, then again, he isn't, so..."   
"What?" asked Nina, looking between her boyfriend and Isak. "Is that..."  
"I was going to tell you," Isak's father assured her. "Just not so... soon."  
"I can understand not randomly telling me explicitly, but you lied," Nina said, shaking her head.   
"I just... I figured, maybe it was just..."  
"We've been living together for eight months, pappa!" shouted Isak. "Fucking Christ, it's not just a phase!"   
"Be quiet!" his father snapped. "You have no idea how difficult this has been for me!"  
"For you?!" Isak yelled back. "All you needed to do was be fine! You didn't even have to be happy! This was hard for me. I hated myself for years because of this, and you- you- all you had to say was that I was right to hate myself!"  
"I never said that, Isak! I don't have any problem with gay people, I just-"  
"What? You just didn't want me to be gay? Because that's too real, too close to home?"   
Isak's father looked around the room. "I just... I thought you were like me. We were always similar, but this? I don't... I don't get this."  
Isak stared at him. "I am nothing like you," he whispered after a moment. "I hate you."  
There was dead silence. Isak's father shut his eyes. "I... why was Even so upset, anyway?"  
"We ran into Lea today," Isak replied coldly. "Got to talking about why you left. How you left."  
"I don't know what you wanted from me, Isak," his dad sighed. "I- I didn't love mama."  
"You were cheating on her for two years! Probably longer! And then you-" he felt tears break into his eyes but he tried to hold them in. "You just... I was screaming, begging you not to go, but you just pushed me off of you and slammed the door right in my face." He was quiet and dark for a moment. "I was sick all over the door, you know."  
His dad stared at him with wide eyes.   
“I’m just-” Isak took a deep breath. “Nevermind, I… I gotta go, okay?”  
“Isak, we can talk about all this-”  
“No, I- I can’t- I just hate you.” Isak was shaking. “I mean, I don’t hate you. I don’t want to hate you. I’m just- I just gotta go, okay?”  
Looking away, Isak’s dad said nothing. After a beat, Isak walked to Even and shook him. The older boy was slightly bruised in a couple of places. He didn’t wake up for a while, and Isak was feeling increasingly uncomfortable as he tried to get him to open his eyes, his dad and Nina watching. When Even finally did blink awake, he looked up at Isak with confused eyes.   
“What… oh. You came to get me.” He glanced around. “What time is it?”  
“Almost three,” Isak replied. He tried to keep his voice down- he didn’t like the idea of his father hearing them interact.   
“I’m sorry you’re awake,” Even sighed, voice gravely. Isak took his hand and ran his thumb over his knuckles.   
“Don’t be. Come on, we’re going.”   
Even sat up at Isak went to walk away. He noticed the others in the room. “I- I came here for a reason.”   
“Not now, we’ve got to go.”  
“But-” Even stuttered, and then Isak as turning and pressing a kiss to his mouth and his dad had never seen them kiss before and both boys were trembling. When Isak pulled away, Even saw how he was teary eyed and, even in his state, he understood. “Okay. Let’s go.”  
They walked through the room and towards the door.   
“I’m sorry, Isak,” the woman whose name Even didn’t know said. “I didn’t… I didn’t know about… I thought you were cousins.”  
At this, Even tensed. Isak’s dad was just behind them, still staring at the ground, and it was that fucking man who decided to leave Isak and make him ashamed and Jesus fucking Christ he left and you’re going to leave and everyone leaves Isak so you have to stay but he left, how the fuck did he leave-  
Isak shouted as Even spun around and smashed his fist into his dad’s face. “Even, no!” he cried, pulling at the older boy’s shoulders, but his dad went flying into the wall and there was blood and Nina was screaming.   
“Stop it, stop it,” he sobbed, trying with all his might to drag Even away, but Even was so strong.   
Finally, Isak ran to Even’s other side and put himself directly in between his boyfriend and his father. Even took one look at Isak’s terrified face and put his hands down. He looked at Isak and tried to figure out what was wrong because he knew something was but he kept jumping thoughts, always to the next thing, and it was so hard to focus.   
“Let’s go home. Please,” Isak begged.   
Even followed him out. 

On the walk home, they said nothing. Isak was furious with himself- why the fuck hadn’t he seen this coming? All the sex, Even being so public when he knew it made Isak uncomfortable, the irregular sleeping, god what the fuck was wrong with him? How had he missed it?  
Even was reeling. He was frustrated- why had Isak stopped him? He- he knew what needed to happen, he knew. Why couldn’t Isak see that he knew, why couldn’t anyone understand that he knew what needed to happen, what was going to happen?! But he was also scared. So scared. It was mostly Isak’s silence and teary eyed terror that made him scared. 

They got home around four. The lights were all out. Isak walked in and threw his keys on the table before going into their room. Even followed- what else could he do?  
“What… what happened?” the smaller boy asked when Even walked in, sitting on the edge of their bed.   
“I- I went to his house because… he can’t just…” Even trailed. What had happened?  
Isak sighed. “Let’s just… can you sleep?”  
Sleep? There were things to be done.   
Isak was so beautiful. Even had done all this for him, done the right thing for him and now he was so beautiful and so Even surged forward and pressed their lips together but Isak pulled back and pushed him away. “Not now,” he said, shaking his head sadly. Even didn’t understand.   
“Why?”  
“You’re manic.”  
What- what a stupid thing to say. Manic. What a stupid concept. He just- he was just- he just knew what was happening and what needed to happen, why couldn’t Isak see that?  
But Isak didn’t want to fuck. That was okay- that had to be okay. So Even nodded once and sat down beside him in bed. “I- I can’t sleep,” he whispered. The feeling of dread was spreading through his stomach- Isak had said he was manic, pushed him away, Isak was mad. Everything kept moving so fast, he just wanted to sit and breathe but he had to move because there was a great idea out there, waiting for him.  
“What do you want to do then?” asked Isak, looking at him with patient, tender eyes. He smiled softly when Even’s own eyes filled with tears- what? Why was he crying? There was nothing to cry about. But Isak only reached out and wiped one of those tears away before pressing a kiss to Even’s cheek and pulling him close. “I’m right here,” he said quietly. “I’m here.”  
Even took a breath. Isak was there. Things slowed down, in that second.   
“Can we- can I draw you?”  
“Of course,” Isak nodded. He turned on the light as Even got his supplies but there were so many angles and different colorings he could try that by the time the sun was rising he had a dozen half-finished portraits and Isak had such dark circles under his eyes.   
Isak got him food and Even ravaged it. Noora brought Isak food- why was Noora looking at Even with so much worry?- but Isak stared at it for a long time before letting out a dejected sigh and setting it aside.   
Even took the plate and tried to feed Isak but the smaller boy smiled tiredly and gently pushed his hand away. “Not now,” he said. “You need rest, Even.”  
And, now that Isak mentioned it, Even realized he was tired. Exhausted. And so he crawled into bed and wrapped Isak in his arms and tried to stop his heart from pounding so much.


	35. Chapter thirty-five

Chapter 35  
“How long has he been out?” asked Eskild as Isak sat at the kitchen table, nursing a cup of coffee.   
“Fourteen hours,” the smaller boy replied.   
“Should you wake him?”  
“Eskild, what do I always tell you?”  
Eskild shrugged. “I don’t know, Isak. Can’t somebody get too much sleep?”  
“He just… just don’t wake him, okay?”  
“Yeah,” Eskild nodded. “Okay.” He stared at Isak for a beat. "What about you?"  
"Hmm?" Isak hummed, eyes unfocused on the mug in his hands.   
"How much sleep have you gotten?"  
Shutting his eyes, Isak let a sigh out through his nose. "I'm fine, Eskild."  
"You know, you need to take care of yourself, too," the older boy said with genuine worry.   
But Isak was tired to the bone and light headed so he stood up and snapped, "I said I'm fine."  
Eskild said nothing as Isak went to walk away- he understood why the boy was upset- but Isak felt guilt curl in his stomach anyway. Just before walking out, he stopped and said, "Thank you. For caring."  
Eskild gave a small smile. "Of course."

Back in their room, Isak sat beside a sleeping Even. His lovely boy looked so small in the bed, tucked into the blankets. Isak brushed some hair out of his face before glancing at the apple and granola bar Noora had brought him earlier. He picked up the bar and unwrapped it.   
He didn’t want to fucking deal with this. He- it wasn’t even necessarily insecurity anymore, or at least not right now, but he felt sick just looking at the stupid thing. Because Even needed him and so he needed to stay in control and of course eating doesn’t mean you don’t have control, but…   
Isak took a bite but it felt like a rock and it sat in his stomach and made him physically nauseous and so he set it aside.   
Suddenly, Even took a deep breath and scooted over a little. His eyes drifted open but his gaze was unsteady until it landed on Isak.   
“Hei,” Isak said, his voice breaking a little in the whisper. Even stared at him for a moment before shutting his eyes again.   
“Do you want me to lay with you?” the younger boy asked after a beat. Even barely nodded, and so Isak crawled beside him and leaned their faces close together. He studied Even’s pretty features and sighed, pushing back some of the older boy’s hair.   
They layed in silence for a long time. Isak tried to pull the blanket tighter over Even’s body, but Even shook his head the tiniest bit. He then blinked his eyes open and ever-so-slowly inched forward so that the blanket bumped into Isak’s chest. The smaller boy understood and pulled it over both of them, situating them so that Even’s face was hidden in the crook of his neck. He could feel each of Even’s breaths. They were long and seemed impossibly heavy.   
Even drifted back to sleep by the time it was getting dark out. Isak was sleepy, too, but he got up and refreshed the glass of water on Even’s bedside table and made sure the bed was set right before going to the kitchen to start on the dishes, since it was his day to do them.   
He started rinsing everything off when Noora walked in. “Oh, Isak, I can do those,” she said immediately.   
“It’s fine,” he replied. Noora was quiet before sighing.   
“Can I at least make you dinner then?”  
“I can make dinner,” Isak said back. “It’s not hard.”  
“I know, just…”  
Glancing over his shoulder, Isak furrowed his eyebrows at her. “What?”  
“I feel like this is partly my fault,” Noora said quietly.   
“What? Noora, it’s not.”  
“But I should’ve known something was up when he was leaving without you so late at night and-”  
“You couldn’t have known, Noora. We have to trust him. We can’t just assume he’s manic whenever he does something out of the ordinary.”  
“I know,” Noora sighed. “I just… if I hadn’t fallen asleep, I could’ve woken you before it was too late or something.”  
“If anyone should have known, it’s me,” Isak assured her. “He… there were very clear signs that I missed. It’s not your fault.”  
“Signs?” asked Noora.   
Isak flushed. “Just… little things,” he said. “But, anyway, he’s okay. It’s all okay.”  
“Are you okay?” the blonde girl asked. “I know he went to your dad’s… is everything okay between you guys?”  
Smiling tiredly, Isak said, “I’m fine.”  
“That doesn’t have to be the answer all the time,” Noora responded gently. Isak turned and tried to give her a more convincing smile.   
“Seriously. I’m fine.”  
After a silent couple of seconds, Noora nodded. “Okay.”  
Isak went back to their room. He sat in bed beside Even and took out his phone. There were several texts from concerned friends. He thumbed out quick responses to all of them and a longer one to Jonas. There was nothing from his dad but there was one from his mom.  
Mama: My son. Your father told me what happened last night. Please know I am so proud of you and I am not angry. I love you so much.   
Isak reread the message several times. He felt his eyes fill with tears and quickly wiped at them before shakily typing, “Hei mama, would it be okay if I called?”  
Mama: Of course.   
Taking a deep breath, Isak pressed the call button and lifted the phone to his ear. His mother picked up after the first ring.   
“Isak?”  
“Hei, mama,” Isak breathed. He felt his throat get thick with tears as he continued, voice cracking, “I’m really sorry.”  
“Oh. Oh, my sweet boy,” his mother sighed, and Isak covered his face with his hand. “You are so brave. Don’t be sorry.”  
“I shouldn’t’ve left,” Isak choked. “I… we saw Lea and I thought of how you said I’d never leave but… I left. I’m so sorry, Mama.”  
“Isak, my love, listen to me,” she cut into his rambling. “You never left me. Even when you distanced yourself from me, you still called me and visited. And you only distanced yourself because I refused to get help. I know… I know the things your father has said have been hurtful and scary, but you have to understand that you are not him and his opinions don’t define you. You are smart and kind and so brave, okay?”  
“I- I’m just- sorry,” Isak stuttered. He heard his mother sigh.   
“You have nothing to be sorry about, but, for whatever you feel you’ve done, I forgive you.” She paused a beat. “How’s Even?”  
“He’s, um… he’s in a depression, now that the mania has ended,” Isak replied.   
“I don’t care about the science, Isak,” his mother said gently. “How is he?”  
“He’s- he’s not talking. He’s mostly sleeping.”  
“Okay. And you, my love? How are you?”  
Isak took a deep breath and closed his eyes. “I’m fine.”

A few hours later, around three or four in the morning, Isak was still sitting in bed, emailing Even’s therapist and texting his parents about what had happened. After he drained the last of his coffee, his stomach growled and he looked again at the apple and bitten bar sitting on the plate by the bed. Picking up the bar, he took another small bite before putting it down again. It tasted like nothing. It made him feel sicker than before.   
When he glanced at Even, he was surprised to see the older boy looking up at him. “Hei,” he rasped, voice gravelly from disuse. He shut the computer and layed down beside Even. The taller boy, who seemed so much smaller in that moment, studied his face. He looked pale, like somebody had taken all the sunshine out of him.   
“Are you hungry?” Isak asked. Even shook his head ever so slightly. Isak frowned. “It’s been almost twenty hours since you ate. Please have something.”  
After shutting his eyes and sitting still for a long while, Even nodded. Isak stood and padded to the kitchen, returning with a sleeve of crackers and another glass of water. Even allowed himself to be fed five or six of the crackers and drank about half the cup before turning away and settling into the pillow. “What about you?” he said after a while, voice barely a whisper. Still, Isak’s heart lept at the sound of it.   
“I’m fine,” he assured his boyfriend, smoothing back Even’s hair. “I’ve been taking care of myself.”  
Even didn’t reply, but, after a very long time, Isak noticed wetness gathering under his lashes. “Is something wrong?” he asked gently.   
Even’s brow furrowed. “I’m a monster.”  
Isak felt his whole body ache. “Hey, no. No. My dad… God, do you know how much it astounds me that when all your emotions are heightened, you go to defend me? All that tells me is that you love me so much. You- you fought my dad for me. Nobody’s ever cared that much. I mean, Even… your mania is still you. I know that. And you did what you did for me. I know… I know you wouldn’t have gotten violent if you weren’t manic. I know you’re probably horrified by what you’ve done, but my dad… he’s not a good person. You have to think about that. I mean, if you could go back would you change much besides the violence?”   
Even didn’t move. Isak took in a deep breath and continued. “You… when I first saw you, it was from across the cafeteria at the beginning of the year. You were listening to Vilde pitch her kosegroup,” he let out a small, barely sincere chuckle. “You looked so interested. And kind. And I kept thinking, if I could just have somebody look at me like that, then maybe I could be happy.” He cautiously wrapped his arms around Even. “You make me so happy, Even,” he said, pulling them closer together. “Does that sound like a monster to you.”  
Tucked into Isak’s collarbone, Even didn’t respond. Isak stared at the wall with wide eyes until he thought the older boy had fallen back asleep. Just as he went to go back to his email, however, he felt Even’s lips move against his chest. “I love you so much.”  
Shutting his eyes and pressing a kiss to Even’s forehead, Isak let out a breath he felt like he’d been holding for a long time.   
“I love you, too.”


	36. Chapter thirty-six

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys!!! The last chapter broke 1000 kudos and 200 comments!! Thank you all so much, I love writing this as much as I hope you love reading it, and it warms my heart to receive so much support:) reading everyone's comments makes my day every time, and I really hope you all continue to stick with this story. Don't worry, fluff will return!!!!

Chapter 36  
Isak felt his head loll to the side and blinked a couple of times, refocusing on his laptop. How was it light out already? He thought about it for a few seconds and realized he hadn't slept in over thirty hours. Fuck.  
It had been four days since Even had gone to see his dad. Isak had only slept a couple of hours each night but last night he hadn't slept at all.  
His forehead was throbbing. Gingerly getting out of bed, Isak padded into the kitchen. He went to the medicine drawer and grabbed himself a couple tablets of Advil and then got a glass of water. Linn walked in behind him.  
"Can I have some?" she asked, gesturing to the pill bottle. Isak passed it over. "Thanks."  
"Mmhmm," Isak replied, rubbing his eyes. He started back to the bedroom, crawling under the comforter and cuddling into Even's side after getting there. He shut his eyes and let out a quiet sigh. Just as he felt himself drifting, Even shifted against him and cleared his throat softly.  
Immediately propping himself up on one elbow, Isak looked down at the taller boy. Even's eyes were open.  
"Hi, baby," he said, brushing away some of Even's hair. The older boy swallowed.  
"I," he started, voice barely anything. He cleared his throat again and continued, "I have to go to the bathroom."  
"Okay," Isak whispered. Slowly, slowly, Even got out of bed and started making his way towards the bathroom. Isak watched. He stared patiently at the door for the whole time his boyfriend was gone.  
Even came back holding two bowls of cereal.  
"Noora got these," he said, walking to the bed and sitting beside Isak.  
"That was nice," Isak replied, taking his bowl from Even's outstretched hand and setting it aside. Even stared at it.  
"She said you didn't eat dinner with them last night," he said after a moment. Isak's heart started to hammer- Even should not, would not waste his strength worrying about him.  
"I ate after they went to bed," Isak lied. Well, he had eaten a bite of the granola bar, so technically it wasn't a lie. Not a real one.  
Even searched his face. "Will you eat if I do?" he asked tiredly after a moment.  
Body nearly trembling, Isak gave his best smile and picked up his bowl. "Of course, sweetie. I'm so happy you're eating, too, but don't worry about me. I'm fine."  
Even said nothing. He only stared until Isak lifted the spoon to his mouth and took a bite.  
Slowly, they ate their breakfast together. Every bite felt too big and too heavy to Isak. They were dragging him down. Soon he'd be drowning.  
"Are you tired?" Isak asked once Even had finished. The older boy laid down without replying.  
Sighing, Isak nuzzled into him. He stayed like that for a while, felt Even's breathing even back out as the taller boy fell under again. Just as his own body stared going senseless and peaceful, however, his phone began to buzz on the bedside table.  
Moving quickly and quietly as do not to wake Even, he grabbed the phone. His father was calling.

"Pappa?" Isak had slipped into the hallway.  
"Isak. I... I'm calling to apologize for my behavior the other night. I said a lot of things in anger that were... wrong. And I'm sorry for that."  
His father's voice sounded tired. He didn't seem insincere necessarily, but he certainly didn't seem to care all that much.  
"Takk, Pappa," Isak replied after a beat. His own voice was barely a scratch.  
"Well... is there anything you want to talk about with me?" his father asked. Isak shut his eyes.  
"Nei."  
"Are you sure? Because if you wanted to talk about Lea or how I left or Even, I promise I'll listen and..."  
Isak stopped hearing him. His mind had started spinning too fast again. Just at the mention of all those stupid, stupid things. The cereal in his stomach churned.  
"I've gotta go, pappa," he breathed shakily.  
"Okay, but-" Isak hung up.  
Pushing his way into the bathroom, the blond boy stared at himself in the mirror. He was pale and sweaty and shaking.  
Everything from the last few days(years) started crying out for him to pay attention to them. His vision got blurrier as he lowered his head and started into the sink. His throat was getting tight.  
"Fuck," Isak breathed, slowly sinking to his knees and pressing his head against the cool countertop of the sink. For a moment, everything went still and quiet. And then he was gagging and scrambling towards the toilet. 

Flushing one final time and leaning back against the bowl, Isak closed his eyes. He was trying to get control back over his breathing when a knock sounded at the door.  
“Isak?” Noora’s pretty voice rang through.  
“I’m in here,” he called back, standing and walking swiftly to the sink. He started brushing his teeth.  
“Are you okay?”  
“Ja? I’m using the bathroom, Noora, could I have some privacy?” he asked with feigned annoyance, taking the brush momentarily out of his mouth.  
“...I heard you throw up. Let me in, Isak.”  
Sighing, Isak spit into the sink and opened the door for her. She was staring up at him with worried eyes. “Are you okay?” she asked again.  
“I’m fine,” he replied immediately. “I just… I think I just ate something bad. I’m fine.”  
“Isak…” Noora trailed nervously. “Did you make yourself-”  
“What?! Nei! I- I told you I ate something bad, now can you stop pestering me and- and acting like you know me?!” Isak snapped. Noora looked down.  
“I do know you, Isak,” she said softly.  
“Well…” he sighed, feeling immediately awful for yelling at her. “Well, you’re wrong about this, okay? Please don’t stress. And please, please don’t mention this to Even. He has enough to deal with.”  
After a silent beat, Noora nodded. “Alright,” she said. Isak smiled down at her.  
“Thank you.”

Isak checked his phone. By now, it was nearing ten. It was too late to go to sleep, so he went to the kitchen and poured himself a cup of coffee. Just then, Eskild walked out.  
“Halla, baby boy,” he mused, opening the cabinets and looking for breakfast. He’d been sporadically calling Isak baby boy ever since he overheard Even use the nickname, much to Isak’s annoyance. Right now, though, the younger boy was too tired to care. Eskild glanced at him. “Yikes, you look terrible.”  
“Thanks,” Isak replied sarcastically.  
“Serr, though. You look like you haven’t slept in days.”  
“It was a long night.”  
Eskild nodded. “Well, you should take a shower or something,” he suggested, knowing better than to pressure Isak about sleep again.  
“Nei, I can’t do that, I have to watch-”  
“Isak, I’ll watch him,” Eskild cut in. “I’ll get you if he wakes up.”  
“But- but-”  
“You stink, Issy, and you’re sweaty and gross. Get in the shower.”  
Staring at the table, Isak tried to figure why he shouldn’t. When he couldn’t come up with a reason, he reluctantly stood. “Just a quick one.”  
Eskild wiggled his eyebrows at Isak, who rolled his eyes and walked to the bathroom.  
As soon as Isak got in the shower, his tiredness really hit him. The water was so comfortable and calming and he just melted back against the wall. Letting his eyes drift closed, the boy thought, only for a second.  
After a few seconds he sank onto the floor. He wasn't quite aware of it.  
Eskild's knocking woke him fifteen minutes later. "Even's up," the older boy called through the door as Isak's eyes fluttered open. "Just so you know. There's no need to rush, though, Isak."  
Standing, the teenager washed the sleep out of his face and hurriedly turned off the shower. 

"Hey," Isak said, cracking open the door to their room and slipping inside. Even was sitting up in bed, his phone in one hand. "Sorry, I was showering."  
"It's okay," Even replied softly. Isak's heart felt lighter at the sight of him awake and talking.  
"What are you doing?" he asked cautiously, letting his towel drop and grabbing a pair of boxers. When Even didn't respond, he glanced over and caught the older boy staring at his body. Blushing, Isak pulled on the boxers and then a pair of shorts. "Stop staring," he half-jokingly commanded. Even's gaze drifted back up to his face and the older boy gave a small smile.  
"Sorry. I'm just responding to my mom and some friends."  
After tugging a shirt over his head, Isak walked to the bed and snuggled up beside Even. "That's nice," he said quietly.  
He could feel Even thumbing out messages as he closed his eyes, but, as soon as the older boy stopped moving, he opened them again.  
Even was staring straight ahead. The phone was locked and in his lap.  
"What are you thinking?" Isak whispered.  
After a beat of silence, Even sighed. "Should I... should I apologize to your dad?"  
Furrowing his brow, Isak propped himself up a little further. "Why would you do that?"  
"Because I barged into his house at midnight and attacked him?"  
Letting out a soft breath, Isak pressed a kiss to Even's neck. "He deserved it," the younger boy breathed. "If you feel like you've really done something wrong, then apologize, but you don't have to do it on my behalf."  
Even nodded. "I'll think about it," he said.  
They sat in silence for a while. Eventually, Isak asked, "What are you in the mood to do?"  
After a couple of moments, Even replied, "I... do you want to watch a movie?"  
"Sure," Isak agreed immediately. He grabbed his laptop. "Do you want to pick one out and I'll get you lunch?"  
Even nodded once. "You too," he said quietly. Isak feigned a smile.  
"Of course."

Returning with two sloppy sandwiches, Isak found Even waiting with a movie they'd already seen queued up.  
"Here," the younger boy said, passing his boyfriend one of the plates. Even took it and started eating. Isak got in bed beside him and Even leaned against his chest.  
The movie felt long to Isak. He chewed each bite of his sandwich until it was nothing and every swallow got harder. Eventually, Even fell asleep on top of him, empty plate cast aside. Gingerly moving the older boy, Isak wiggled away and threw the rest of his own lunch in the kitchen trash, covering it in paper towels before returning and setting his plate on top of Even's.  
He knew it was bad. He wasn't stupid. He knew if anybody found out they'd be angry and scared. But... there was too much else to worry about. And he didn't need the food, anyway.  
Grabbing his phone, he saw several notifications from Eva.  
Eva: Hi, can you help me?  
Eva: Vilde is mad at me  
Eva: I think I fucked up again and I'm really freaking out  
Eva: Noora told me Evens not doing well rn so if not I completely understand but I'd really appreciate it  
Sighing, Isak typed out a reply. "Yeah of course. What's up?"  
He watched at Eva typed.  
Eva: okkk so Vilde is super pretty right? But she doesn't really think that abt herself. I always try to make her feel better but idk, I'm bad at comforting people. Soo the other night I wanted her to come to this party with me but she was upset abt something and said all the girls there would be prettier than her and I said she was being crazy and that she's beautiful but she was sad abt other stuff and she pretty much refused to come. So I got kinda pissed bc I didn't want to go alone and Noora and the others were busy, so I told Vilde she's super hot and that nobody there would be prettier than her and that she was being stupid. I know, fuck me. But I was just trying to make her feel better but she makes it so hard and idk. Anyway, she got mad and said I was being insensitive and I said I didn't want to go alone. So she said to stay home but I didn't want that either bc I'd promised some ppl I'd be there. And then I just got annoyed and left. So... I'm pretty screwed.  
Isak frowned reading the text. He loved Eva with all his heart but sometimes she could be quick to say or do things.  
Starting to reply, Isak typed, "You're not screwed. That just sounds like a small argument that basically stemmed from you wanted Vilde to feel pretty, right? It wasn't that bad."  
Eva: yeah but she's not talking to me. Which is dramatic  
Isak: she's probably just brooding. Have you apologized?  
Eva: ...kinda? I tried but she didn't reply even though she read it so I texted her again and eventually I took it back bc I was mad  
Laughing through his nose, Isak smiled.  
Isak: just go over. Say you're sorry. She's probably sorry, too, but you're both stubborn.  
Eva: ugh  
Isak: sorry, you asked for help  
Eva: whatever. Thanks Isak  
Isak: anytime  
Tossing his phone aside, Isak laid back on the bed. He stared up at the ceiling for a while. Even’s soft snoring rumbled through his body. Isak’s mind drifted and he felt like he was floating.  
His heart was thudding slowly in his chest. The room lazily moved around him. His stomach hurt. 

“Isak?”  
The blond boy curled into the mattress.  
“Isak, wake up.”  
“Nei,” he sighed.  
“Isak!”  
Snapping his eyes open, Isak glared up at whoever was bothering him. “What?!”  
He was surprised to see Vilde hovering over him. “What… what the fuck, Vilde?”  
“I’m sorry,” Vilde stuttered. Isak noticed her teary eyes. He softened.  
“What time is it?”  
“Only two,” Vilde said. Isak sighed. He’d only slept for half an hour or so. He suddenly glanced behind him.  
“Where’s Even?”  
“He was out feeding Cardamom when I got here,” Vilde explained. She was still hovering over Isak, so he scooted over and made room for her to sit.  
“What’s… what’s wrong?”  
“Nothing, not really, it’s just… Eva and I had a fight and she wanted to apologize, so she came to my house, but she got kind of drunk first because she was nervous, I think… anyway, my mom doesn’t let me have people over, and she’d be really, really mad if she found Eva there drunk, and Noora and Eskild aren’t home but Noora gave me a key a while ago and she said Eva could stay here, but she’s pretty out of it so I was wondering if you could hang out with her until Noora got home?”  
Isak squinted at her. Why had Eva gotten drunk? Of fucking course she had, but… why such bad timing? “Uh… sure, I guess.”  
“I know Even’s having a hard time and you’re probably already really busy, but Sana is away with her family and Chris isn’t replying and-” Vilde’s tears started to spill over.  
“Hey, it’s okay, I can watch her. Noora will be home soon anyway, right?” Isak reassured her, placing one hand awkwardly on the blonde girl’s shoulder. “Why… why doesn’t your mom let you have people over?”  
Vilde sniffed. “It’s kind of complicated,” she mumbled.  
“Okay. Well, I can watch Eva. Where is she?”  
“I left her on the couch,” Vilde explained, standing and walking towards the living room. Isak followed. What he saw there made him smile.  
“Oh, you’re so cute,” Eva was cooing, cuddling Cardamom to her chest. “I just want to snuggle forever, you’re such a little angel.”  
Even was sitting beside her, a tired grin on his face.  
“Alright, Eva,” he said, “don’t suffocate her.”  
“Oh!” Eva exclaimed. “Oh, Isak! Oh, you’re here,” she said, standing and throwing her arms around the boy. Isak stumbled backwards.  
“Hey, Eva,” he said, rubbing her back. Vilde looked around worriedly.  
“Alright, so I better go,” she said. And then Eva was hugging her, squeezing her and pressing sloppy kisses to her cheeks. Vilde patted her gently. “I’ll see you guys later,” she said, unlatching herself from her girlfriend and slipping out. Eva watched, pouting for a moment.  
“Hey, so, how about we get you some water, okay?” Isak said. He gently handled Eva, getting her water and food and set up on Noora’s bed. Even wandered back to their room with Cardamom as Isak sat and talked to Eva. Turns out Noora wasn’t that far from home and so she got back relatively quickly and took Eva off of Isak’s hands. The teenager reunited with Even.  
“Halla, baby,” he said, sitting beside the taller boy. Evn was resting in bed.  
“Hei,” he whispered back. “My mom said you texted her?”  
“Yeah. She was worried.”  
Even was quiet for a while. “Thank you,” he said after a moment.  
“Of course.”  
“You look tired.”  
Breathing out through his nose, Isak pressed a kiss to Even’s temple. “Don’t worry about me.”  
“How much sleep have you gotten?”  
“Enough.”  
“What have you eaten today?”  
Sighing shortly, Isak tilted back his head. “Even, have a given you any reason to doubt that I’m okay besides ‘looking tired?’ You need to think about yourself.”  
There was silence. “I just…” Even began after a beat. “I just hate feeling like I’m letting you down because I can’t even handle my own shit.”  
Isak was frozen. He felt so selfish. He knew if Even found out what had been going on he’d be furious with himself, but, then again, Isak needed to be there for Even right now and that meant being in control and being in control meant being awake and alert and god, Isak needed to be able to feel his heartbeat in his forehead or else he’d feel like an even bigger failure and he wouldn’t have any control at all. He had to be there for Even, even if that might hurt him, because he cared more for Even’s well being than his trust and, mostly, he cared more for Even than he cared for himself.  
“I know, love,” he breathed. “You’re always there. If ever I’m not okay, it’s my fault for not telling you.”  
God, did he really just say that out loud with all this going on? He was such a fucking snake. Even deserved somebody better.  
“Okay,” Even replied. 

By evening, the boys had spent a good day, with Even feeling slightly better every hour. They stayed in their room for the most part. Isak was glad when Even fell asleep after dinner because that meant he could throw the rest of his away. As he scraped it into the trash, however, the guilt was almost crippling. It killed him knowing he wasn’t being honest with Even.  
He’ll think you don’t trust him he’ll think you’re not communicating he’ll think he’ll think he’ll think-  
Putting his plate on the table, Isak walked back to their room. I have to tell him, he thought.  
As soon as he got there, he was hit with a wave of dizziness. When was the last time he’d slept? There was forty-five minutes or so throughout the day, but otherwise it had been nearly forty eight hours. And he hadn’t really eaten… he’d thrown up his cereal…  
After catching his breath, the boy continued towards Even. “Ev…” he began, but then he was light headed again, worse this time, and so cold. His head felt too heavy and it rolled down as pins and needles shot through his body.  
“Isak?” he heard Even grumble. The younger boy sunk to his knees, panting. “Isak!?”  
Even rushed out of bed and kneeled beside him.  
“I haven’t been… I haven’t been doing so well…” Isak mumbled, eyes going out of focus. And then his forehead hit the ground.


	37. Chapter thirty-seven

Chapter 37  
Isak woke up in their bed. He was alone. His head was pounding.   
He vaguely remembered fading in and out of consciousness as Even situated him and worried about him and fed him something- fuck. The thought made Isak’s heart twist in on itself.  
Where was Even? Actually, where was anybody? His door was open and the lights were off. It was far too quiet.   
Looking around, Isak spotted his phone and grabbed it. There was only one message and it was from Magnus, just something dumb about a video game.   
Leaning his head back, Isak stared at the ceiling. His eyes welled up with tears at which he quickly swiped. More than anything, he was terrified Even would be mad. He knew the older boy would be upset with himself mostly, but Isak was definitely the one to blame because he’d fucked up again and so Even was probably going to yell at him and Jesus did he hate getting yelled at. Always had.   
Just then, a light flicked on somewhere outside. Isak heard footsteps headed toward him and immediately shut his eyes.   
He could feel somebody enter the room and sit on the bed. Barely opening his eyes, he gleaned that it was Even. The older boy was looking away, staring at the ground, and he looked so broken that Isak wanted to start crying again.   
Even leaned back, laying down to that he was perpendicular to his boyfriend. “Hi,” he whispered. Isak started. He hadn’t realized Even knew he was awake.   
“Hi,” he said back.   
Isak couldn’t see Even’s face as he said, “I think… I think I’m gonna stay with my parents for a while.” He couldn’t see Even’s face but his whole body went cold and his fingers disappeared and he was almost certain he was going to throw up all over the bed.   
“I just…” Even continued. “I know you’re in a really hard place right now, with everything that’s happened recently. And… you shouldn’t have to deal with me, too.” His voice broke. “I’m so sorry, Isak.”  
Isak couldn’t talk. He couldn’t- he couldn’t do anything and that was what made it hurt so bad.   
“I love you so much, and that’s why… that’s why I can’t let myself hurt you.”   
And that’s when Isak did throw up. He pushed himself over the side of the bed and was sick half into their tiny trashcan and half onto the floor. He felt Even scramble up behind him and he felt his hands on his back, which made him gag more. He heard Even’s “No no no”s and he couldn’t help but agree. No, no, no.   
Even tried to kiss the back of his neck, but Isak convulsed and spit up bile. After that, Even moved away.   
Once his body had stopped twitching, Isak sat back on the bed. “Please don’t leave,” he whispered, voice shaking.   
“I don’t wanna, baby,” Even replied, tilting his head. “I just don’t know what else to do. You… you try so hard to be there for me that you forget about yourself. And I can’t even return that favor.” He looked so angry with himself. This was much worse than Isak had imagined.   
“No, no, I promise I was gonna tell you,” the younger boy hyperventilated. “I promise, I promise that’s why I came in- I- I just didn’t expect to pass out. But I promise, promise I was gonna tell you.”   
Even stared at him. “Don’t lie,” he said softly. “Please.”  
“I’m not lying,” Isak sobbed. “I’m not lying. I couldn’t finish dinner and I knew I had to tell you so- so I came in to do it but then- but I swear. I was going to tell you. I’m really sorry I didn’t tell you before but I just- it takes time for me to figure it out for myself and I- I’m really trying.” He tried to catch his breath. His voice got more serious. “But if you go, I won’t… I won’t have anyone to tell.”  
“You can still tell me,” Even practically pleaded.   
“No,” Isak argued, “no, it’s not- I need you here. I need you here.” He threw his arms around Even’s neck and held on like he was drowning, pressing desperate kisses to his neck and cheek. “Please don’t leave me alone,” he whispered into the older boy’s ear.   
Slowly, he felt Even’s arms wrap around his waist and pull him close. He felt Even breathe into his hair as he replied, “You’re not alone.”

“We need rules,” Even said, sitting across from Isak. It had been a few hours since the younger boy had first woken, and they’d come to the conclusion that Even would stay, but some things had to change. Isak had explained everything that had been going on with him.   
“Okay,” Isak agreed immediately.   
“We have our rules about me. No skipping pills. No more than three beers, no smoking. But we need rules about you.”  
Isak nodded.   
“I need to know what you eat. We eat meals together most of the time, but if not, you need to send me pictures. You have to finish what I give you, if you can. And you need to really try. If you haven’t eaten enough or you can’t, you need to tell me and you need to tell me why. If you have a panic attack, you need to tell me and you need to tell me why. If you can’t sleep and it’s been more than an hour, you need to wake me-”  
“Even-”  
“No questions, Isak. I can’t… I can’t let you get that bad again. And if you’re hurting when I’m depressed, you still have to tell me. Even if you think it’s going to hurt me or something. Because not telling me? That’s what hurts.”  
Isak blinked away his tears. “I’m sorry,” he whispered. Even reached out and rubbed his knee.   
“I know. But I’m serious. I know you don’t want to, like, kick me when I’m down or whatever, but I was depressed when you were going through everything and you had to bear the burden for both of us. That’s not fair. We need to be equal in this. And that means sharing everything.”  
Hanging his head, Isak nodded again. He felt a tear run down his face and then Even’s soothing hand wiping it away. “Why are you sad?”  
“I… I feel like I let you down,” the smaller boy whispered.   
There was quiet, and then Even was tugging Isak into him, pulling them flush against each other and twisting his boy so that Isak’s back was against his chest. “I think you’re so brave and strong, baby. We’re both learning.”

Isak could hear Even’s heartbeat. He’d just woken up- it was early, but he’d gone to bed early. Early and with a heavy heart and head, tear stained cheeks and the lingering remains of terror, terror that had melted into relief, but not the light sort of relief, more of a gut-wrenchingly desperate relief. It was the feeling of near-death, of knowing you’d almost lost it all.   
Even shifted below him and tightened his arms around Isak. “Are you awake?” he whispered. Isak nodded into his chest. “Good morning.”  
“Morning,” the smaller boy said back.   
“How are you.”  
Isak bit down on his “fine.” He took a few breaths. “I’m scared but I don’t know why.”   
Even stroked his shoulder. “Scared?”  
“I… I feel like everything almost fell apart. Like I almost got hit by a car but it stopped an inch away.”   
“Isak… you weren’t going to lose me,” Even reminded him gently.   
“I know,” Isak assured him. “I just… I need you here.”  
Even nodded. “So why are you scared?”  
Isak couldn’t look up at him as he replied, “I… everything feels too fragile now.”  
“Hey,” Even replied, tilting his chin up. “Hey. We’re solid.”  
Isak nodded once. Even kissed him and he wanted to cry.

They were leaning against the couch. The TV was playing but Isak wasn’t paying attention. Instead, he was paying attention to the lunch Even had made him. It was making him feel sick but he forced himself to keep it down. There are rules, now, he told himself. You can’t lose him.   
Even was behind him, arms wrapped around his back and hands clasped at his belly button. Noora and Eva were there, too. Noora didn’t mention it, but Isak knew from her eyes that she knew what had happened last night. Eva seemed oblivious.   
“You’re doing so well,” Even whispered in his ear.   
Cardamom padded over and curled into Isak’s lap. He ran his head over the top of her smooth head. 

Days came and went. As always, it was difficult to get back on their feet again after one of Even’s episodes, and it was made much harder with Isak’s. After a while, though, things settled down. It didn’t seem so difficult or scary, getting up in the morning.   
“I’m tired,” Isak mumbled into Even’s chest. It was late- later than they’d gone to bed in a while- and people were finally starting to file out of the party the kollektivet had hosted- the first party they’d been to in a while. Isak felt Even’s hand curl around his bicep.   
“I know.”  
“I want to go to sleep.”  
“Okay.”   
Isak squinted up at him. “Is that what you want?”  
Nodding, Even pressed a kiss to his forehead. He rubbed Isak’s back with his other hand.   
“Are you sure?” the smaller boy pressed. Even swallowed.   
“I… I might finish the movie I fell asleep during yesterday.”  
Isak nodded. “Okay.”

 

Isak’s curls were sweaty. They’d been for a walk and it was hot outside. Now they were sitting in the park, under the sun, and Isak was laughing in that way that made Even smile with his full face. He reached over and took the smaller boy’s hand, a small but sincere gesture that he knew Isak wouldn’t object to.   
“I love you,” he said quietly, tilting his head sideways. Isak’s laughter faded into a fond smile and he squeezed Even’s hand back. “I love you, too.”


	38. Chapter thirty-eight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just a little shot of Isak getting Even a gift:)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lol I had no inspiration until I got a piece of truth-or-dare gum from my friend (idek if they have that in Norway or like anywhere besides where I'm from but it was vital to the plot so...) and it had that dare. I have nobody to write about lol but of course I thought of our boys:)

Chapter 38  
Isak woke to silence. He cracked open his eyes to an empty bed. His mood dampened immediately.  
Standing, he made his way into the kitchen.  
There was Even, tall and handsome as ever, toasting bagels and making coffee. Isak leaned against the doorframe and smiled at his back.  
"Hei," he breathed. Even turned around, startled, but then his face broke into the biggest smile.  
"Hei, baby," the taller boy said back, walking over and planting a kiss on Isak's waiting mouth. "I have something for you," he continued, pulling away. Isak furrowed his brow as Even walked to the table and picked up what looked like a piece of trash. "I forgot to give it to you yesterday."  
He handed Isak what turned out to be a gum wrapper. On the white side his name was written five times. He looked at Even with confusion.  
"Turn it over," Even commanded. Isak flipped it around to the shiny green side. There were words on it. Turns out it was a piece of 5 truth-or-dare gum. He rolled his eyes when he read the dare.  
"Write five words to describe the person you want to make out with," it said. Isak looked up at Even with a smirk and shook his head.  
"You're such a nerd," he scolded.  
Even dropped his jaw. "You're so mean!" he laughed, making Isak laugh through his nose and shake his head again. Even leaned in and pecked him. "You love it," he whispered. He pulled away and waited for Isak to agree. When the younger boy only smiled and raised his eyebrows, Even laughed again and grabbed him by the hips.  
"Tell me you love it," he said sweetly, pressing his forehead to Isak's. The smaller boy rolled his eyes.  
"I love it."  
"I knew it," Even gloated softly. He placed several more quick kisses around Isak's face, who smiled and swatted him away.  
"Ugh, must you two be so in love at nine in the morning?" they heard Eskild ask. Even turned around and Isak looked from over the older boy's shoulder.  
"Had a fight with Oliver?" guessed Even. Eskild nodded once.  
"What did you do?" Isak quipped, earning a glare.  
"And why do you assume it was me?"  
"You're the dramatic one."  
Eskild smiled and flipped him off. Just then, Noora walked out.  
"What's going on?" she asked.  
"Eskild's moody," Isak replied.  
"Isak's a little bitch," Eskild snapped back. Everyone turned to him confusedly, causing him to sigh. "Sorry," he mumbled, rubbing his forehead.  
"It's fine," Isak shrugged with a half smile, seeing that Eskild was legitimately upset. "It's true, anyway."  
That made Eskild smile sincerely, even though it was small.  
Noora rolled her eyes and started making breakfast. Even cocked his head at Isak and said, "I gotta head to work now. See you later?"  
Isak nodded and reluctantly let go of his hand. He gave Even a soft kiss on the cheek. 

Later, in his room, Isak was toying with the gum wrapper. He felt bad.  
Of course a gum wrapper wasn't a big gift- it wasn't really a gift at all-  
but still. Even always did little things like this. He managed to surprise Isak with some small gesture at least once a day. And Isak... he didn't really return the favor.  
Grabbing his phone, he scrolled through all his pictures with Even. Half of them were taken on some spontaneous date Even had planned. Isak was wearing the grey green snapback that Even bought him- "It matched your eyes!"- in three of them.  
Sighing, Isak got up and headed to the living room, looking for Noora. He found her on the couch, reading.  
"Are you busy?" he asked. Noora looked up at him in surprise.  
"No, why?"  
"I need help," he replied, sitting beside her. Noora closed her book and looked at him expectantly.  
"I want to... buy something for Even."  
"Okay?" Noora asked.  
"And I don't know what to get. He always gets me perfect gifts and I never get him anything except for, like, lunch sometimes."  
Noora smiled. "I don't think Even expects you to get him stuff, Isak," she said.  
"I know, but... I want to. And you guys are the most artsy people I know."  
Biting on her lower lip, Noora looked at him. "You're such a softie," she said. Isak groaned.  
"If you're going to get weird I'll just ask Eva-"  
"Nei!" Noora cut in. "Nei. Let's buy Even something. What are you thinking? Like art supplies?"  
"Not really," Isak admitted. "Maybe something less expensive. Maybe something he can wear."  
"Not all art supplies is expensive," Noora reminded him. Isak rolled his eyes.  
"Ja, but he has all the basic shit. The stuff he doesn't have is fancy. So maybe like a shirt or something?"  
Noora drew in her eyebrows. "No offense, Isak, but I would not be too impressed with a shirt. That's not very... sentimental."  
"This is why I need your help," Isak said.  
"Ja, okay. I know this cute little shop with handmade stuff that's pretty cheap. We could check there and, if there's nothing good, walk around that area?"  
Isak shrugged. "Sounds good." 

They ended up at the store half an hour later. It was cute and it smelled like incense and Isak couldn't help but think about how much Even would love this place. While looking through the selection, however, nothing jumped out at him.  
He ended up in the jewelry section, separated from Noora. Immediately, something caught his eye.  
It was a small, delicate bracelet. A thread-thin silver chain with four tiny beads. In the middle of them, there was an equally small, silver heart. He picked it up and ran his thumb over the understated charms.  
"Are you gonna get that?"  
Nearly dropping the bracelet in surprise, Isak spun around to see Noora peering over him.  
"Fuck, you scared me," he said. And then he registered her question. "Oh, um, nei, I don't think so."  
"Why?" Noora asked plainly, taking the bracelet from him and examining it. She grinned. "I think he'd love it."  
"Yeah, but... I can't buy him a bracelet."  
Noora squinted at him. "Don't be sexist, Isak."  
"That's not sexist!" the blond boy exclaimed. "I mean, would you buy William a bracelet?"  
"William wouldn't want a bracelet," Noora countered. "Even would love this and you know it. You did stop to pick it up. Gender roles can be just as confining to guys as to girls. Don't let that make your decisions for you."  
Looking down, Isak shrugged. "How much does it cost, anyway?"  
Turning it over, Noora checked the little price tag. She read the price and Isak realized he could afford it. “Are you gonna get it?”  
Sighing, Isak considered it. "You really think he'd love it?"  
Smiling, Noora nodded.  
Isak rolled his eyes. "Alright."

"Is this for somebody special?" the cashier asked as Isak checked out. She grinned at him. She was young and pretty. Noora suspected she was hoping the answer was no.  
“Oh, um… yeah,” Isak replied, flushing. The girl smiled and tilted her head.  
“What’s their name?”  
Isak wondered if she was using “their” because she could tell or if she was just trying not to assume anything.  
“It’s, um… his name Even,” he said awkwardly, keeping his eyes down.  
“Well, Even’s very lucky,” the girl commented. “What’s the occasion?”  
Shrugging, Isak replied, “Nothing, really. Just a surprise.”  
“That’s sweet. Do you want me to wrap it?”  
“No, I can do that.”  
“Alright,” she said. He paid and then Noora bought her fancy soaps and the two left.  
“He’s gonna be so happy,” Noora said happily on the trip home. Isak shook his head but he was smiling, too.

“Halla,” Even said, walking into their room and dropping his stuff onto the desk. Isak smiled up at him.  
“Hei,” he said. Something about him seemed cocky. Even narrowed his eyes.  
“What did you do today?” he asked the younger boy suspiciously.  
“I went out with Noora,” Isak replied.  
“To do what?”  
Grinning, Isak reached behind him and grabbed the little, brightly wrapped box. He held it towards Even.  
“What’s this?” the older boy asked with a grin, walking over and taking the box. “Is this for me?”  
Isak nodded once. He swallowed the nervousness in his stomach as Even mock-gasped and started opening the gift. “Whatever is this?”  
Once he got the wrapping off and opened the box, Even stared at the little bracelet. It was so minimalistic it almost blended into the white fluff behind it.  
“You don’t have to wear it if you don’t like it,” Isak blurted out. “I mean… I can return it, or… I don’t know, I thought you’d like it, so… but if you don’t, like, it’s no big deal or anything.”  
Even cocked his head towards Isak. He was smiling hugely. “You got this for me?”  
“Um,” Isak said, staring stupidly as Even started to put it on. “Um, I mean… yeah. I just thought… I wanted to get you something.”  
“That was very nice of you,” Even chuckled, pressing his smiling face closer to Isak’s.  
Finally, Isak let himself start to smile, too. “Do you like it?”  
“Yeah,” Even laughed. “I love it.”  
“Good.” Isak was glowing now. Even ran one hand through his hair.  
“God, You’re such a sweetie,” he praised, pressing a gently kiss to Isak’s jaw. The smaller boy let a sigh out through his nose and gently guided Even’s mouth to his. They kissed lightly. Isak’s stomach flipped as they both fell back into bed.  
“I figured I owed you after the super cool gift you got me this morning,” he joked. Even furrowed his brow, thinking, before rolling his eyes.  
“Alright, smartass, next time I won’t write about you. I’ll write about somebody exotic and artsy and- taller than me.”  
Isak huffed. “I’m the most exotic and artsy person you’ll ever meet.”  
“Ah, but you’re not taller than me,” Even said, earning a light slap in the chest. He grabbed Isak’s hand and pulled the younger boy on top of him.  
“Was this all part of your plan?” the younger boy asked, head now resting on Even’s chest. Even nodded once and squeezed his waist tight.  
“Cuddles are always part of the plan.”  
Snorting, Isak shook his head. “I should buy you presents less often; they turn you into such a sapp.”  
“You’re the one who just bought me a heart-bracelet,” Even countered.  
“Well now you’re making it regret it.”  
Laughing, Even pushed back his hair. “Too bad. I’m gonna wear it everyday. And when people ask me about it, I’ll shout that my boyfriend, Isak Valtersen, bought it for me, and that he is the softest, sappiest boy I know.”  
Isak groaned and smushed his face into Even’s chest. There was a moment of silence, he asked quietly, “Will you really wear it everyday?”  
Even smiled and nodded. “Everyday for the rest of our life.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Plessss give me suggestions!!!


	39. Chapter thirty-nine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Isak and Even babysit Even's cousins, Isak was a lost puppy before Even, Even wants to make him feel at home...

Chapter 39  
“Halla, baby boy!” Even exclaimed as he sat down beside Isak and gave him a mouthful of tongue and suspicion. He was definitely too happy for a random two pm. Isak looked at him with narrow eyes after he pulled away.  
“Halla,” he mumbled, smirking as he looked Even up and down. “What’s happened?”  
“What do you mean?” Even asked back innocently, blinking wide blue eyes. Isak rolled his green ones.  
“You don’t just barge in screaming halla and then make out with me for no reason, Even.”  
Even gasped. “Are you saying my love for you isn’t enough to justify this behavior?”  
Huffing, Isak adjusted his snapback and replied, “Ja, that’s exactly what I’m saying. What do you want from me?”  
“I don’t want anything from you,” Even sighed. Isak stared at him incredulously until he reluctantly continued, “I need something from you.”  
Isak rolled his eyes again, so hard Even thought it must strain them. “What do you need?”  
“I need you to babysit my cousins with me!” Even blurted out. He gave Isak his best puppy dog face but his heart sank when the younger boy immediately snorted and wrinkled his nose.  
“Fuck no.”  
“Please? My aunt and uncle are in town and my mom wanted to take them around Oslo for a few hours but she needs somebody to watch their kids.”  
“Even, I’m shit with little kids. And older kids. And teenagers, and adults, so…”  
Cocking his head, Even pursed his lips. “You’re not shit, baby. They’d really love you.”  
Isak raised his eyebrows. “I’m sure of it,” he said sarcastically.  
“I thought you wanted kids?!”  
“I do, when I’m fifty and have refined my parenting skills.”  
“I think we’ll need to start before fifty, baby,” Even chuckled softly. Isak looked unimpressed, so he moved on. “They’re really sweet kids. Cathrine is six and Karoline is just a baby.”  
Blowing air between his lips, Isak gave it some thought. “How long would it be?”  
“Just a few hours.”  
“At their parent’s?”  
“Ja.”  
“And we’d be home early?”  
“Of course.”  
The younger boy sighed in defeat. “Finnne, but you owe me as many blowjobs as hours we spend there.”  
Laughing, Even said, “That’s a little perverted.”  
“Okay, go alone then,” Isak clapped back.  
Even pressed a kiss to his forehead. “I take it back,” he said. “You’re not perverted. You’re perfectly… appropriate.”  
Glaring, Isak wiped the wet mark off his forehead. “Good.”

Turns out babysitting was even more awkward when Even’s mom was late coming home from work and Isak, Even, Even’s father, uncle and aunt all had to spend ten minutes sitting together uncomfortably. The kids were napping for now.  
As soon as Even’s mom got home, though, and Isak and Even were left alone with the just-woken-up Cathrine, the younger boy was left wishing they hadn’t left. The girl was cute, with dark brown hair and Even’s blue eyes and freckles, but she was so… talkative. And she expected a good response to everything. Each time she stared at Isak with that blank, expectant expression, he felt his stomach twist. He tried to please her, but he had a feeling she’d been expecting somebody more impressive from they way she bounded down the stairs and straight into Even’s arms and, then, looked at him, after Even introduced them, and exclaimed, “You’re Even’s boyfriend? You must be really lucky!”  
At least, unlike the rest of Even’s family, she had no memory of Sonja. Isak felt like he was somebody immediately special to her, since he’d won Even’s heart. Still, she seemed underwhelmed.  
"So you live with Even?" the little girl asked as Even disappeared upstairs after hearing Karoline over the monitor. Isak nodded. "You're sooo lucky. Even is the coolest, smartest, bestest cousin in the whole world! I wish he was my brother, then we'd live together!"  
Isak couldn't help but chuckle. "I am pretty lucky," he agreed. "But Even's not that cool. He's pretty silly sometimes."  
"Like when?" Cathrine asked, interest rising.  
"Well... sometimes he tickles me until I can't breathe. And he cries at movies all the time." He leaned in close to Cathrine's waiting ear. "He even cried watching Frozen."  
"Frozen?" the little girl squeaked, a surprised smile breaking over her face. "I didn't cry watching that! Mama did, though."  
"You're pretty brave," Isak said softly, smiling down at her. She reached up one hand and patted his curls.  
"I like your hair."  
"Thanks," Isak blushed. "I like your skirt." She was in a pink tutu.  
"When you and Even get married, can I be your flower girl?"  
Although taken aback, Isak swallowed his surprise. "Um... maybe you and your sister can do it together?"  
Cathrine considered this and then nodded. "That would be okay." Just then, Even returned with a sleepy baby in clinging around his neck. She looked at least a year old, although Isak couldn't see her face. Cathrine jumped up and ran to them.  
"You cried cuz of Frozen?" she asked. Even shook his head at Isak with a smile.  
"What have you been telling her?"  
"The truth?" Isak giggled. Cathrine tugged on Even's pants.  
"Did you?" she persisted.  
Sighting, Even smoothed back her hair. "I did. But it was a very touching film."  
The little girl shrugged. "I'm hungry," she complained. Even laughed.  
"I'll get you a snack. Isak, take Karoline."  
And then he was handing Isak the baby and walking away. Isak panickedly held her under her tiny armpits about two feet away from him and tilted his head back in surprise.  
She blinked at him. Isak blinked back.  
At least he’d had some exposure to kids, but Isak could ever remember holding an actual baby. Karoline squirmed slightly and Isak realized she probably wasn’t very comfortable. She kicked her chubby little legs and he hesitantly brought her closer to him and sit her on his lap, holding her up so she was facing him.  
“Halla,” he said tentatively. The baby stared at him. She had brown eyes, unlike her sister. She stuck one hand in her mouth.  
“Sooo,” the blond boy drawled. Karoline wiggled. Isak still felt like she wasn’t comfortable she he tried to remember how he’d seen people carry babies and slowly lifted her so that her head was on one of his shoulders. She was heavy but the weight felt surprisingly familiar and good.  
She latched one chubby fist onto his hair. Isak giggled. “You’re like your sister, aren’t you?”  
Instead of giving an answer, Karoline cooed and tugged. She liked the softness. “You’re like Even, too,” Isak said, propping her up further. She radiated warmth and she smelled good. Isak rubbed one hand along her back. “You don’t talk as much as your sister,” he commented. He took out his phone and snapped a photo of him with the baby on his shoulder, sending it to the catfucker group chat, to which Even had been added. 

Isak: guys I fucked up. I kidnapped a baby.  
Mahdi: Yeah ok Tootsie.

Isak rolled his eyes at the (movie?) reference he didn’t understand. He’d ask Even later. 

Magnus: Serr???!!!  
Mahdi: Maggie.  
Jonas: Magnus tell me you’re kidding  
Magnus: What?  
Isak: magnus I didn’t steal a baby.  
Magnus: It wasn’t THAT crazy  
Isak: ?  
Mahdi: ?  
Jonas: ?  
Magnus: Ok ok whatever  
Magnus: who is that then?  
Isak: Even’s cousin  
Magnus: send a face pic!  
Mahdi: cats and babies, that’s fucked up  
Magnus: shut the fuck up, man, I just wanna see a cute baby because I’m not heartless like all of you  
Jonas: leave me out of this, I’m innocent  
Even: You’ve got a thing for my cousin, Mags?  
Magnus: ughhhhh fuck all of you  
Jonas: !  
Magnus: *but Jonas  
Jonas: thank you

Chuckling, Isak turned Karoline around so she was facing the camera. He tried to imitate her face- a wide-eyed little smile- and sent it. 

Mahdi: she’s cute!  
Magnus: awwwwwwwwwww<3  
Jonas: Even why’d you leave her with Isak? He sucks balls with kids  
Even: Hahaha, I’m just in the other room with my other cousin.  
Jonas: Okay good. Don’t leave them alone for too long  
Isak: Excuse me, I am a baby-whisperer now, Jonas.  
Jonas: mmhmm  
Magnus: Mahdi remember when you tripped on that baby?  
Mahdi: that was an eight year old  
Magnus: it was still really funny tho  
Magnus: his mom was pissed  
Mahdi: wasn't my fault her son decided to tie his shoe in the middle of the fucking restaurant

Uninterested, Isak tossed his phone aside. He looked at Karoline and moved his face close to hers, so that their noses were almost touching. And then he blew a soft breath over her face. She broke into a smile and giggled, kicking her feet. “You like that?” Isak laughed, doing it again. Just then, Even walked back in with a pacified Catherine.  
“Hei,” he said, grinning. “Come here.”  
Isak situated Karoline on his hip and walked to Even, who took out his phone. “Wanna send a picture to our friends?” he asked Cathrine, who took her juicebox out of her mouth immediately.  
“Yes!!”  
“Okay,” Even chuckled. They all gathered close to each other. “Silly faces!”  
Even snapped the pic and sent it.

Mahdi: You guys are so domestic goddamn  
Magnus: can you stop being such old people for one second  
Magnus: ugh evak is so precious  
Jonas: <3

“So, what do you all want to do?” Even asked. Cathrine jumped up and down.  
“Can I give you a makeover?!”  
“Sure,” Even laughed. Cathrine squealed and grabbed his hand, dragging him upstairs. Isak followed with Karoline still on his hip.  
By the time he arrived, Even was sitting in the middle of a white carpeted floor with plastic barrettes and a palette of chalky looking something (eyeshadow?) Cathrine excitedly rubbed some of the pink onto his cheeks- “This is blush. It’s to make your cheeks red,”- and then some blue above his eyes, up near his eyebrows. Even kept his face perfectly still, a slight smile resting on his mouth. Isak bounced Karoline, who’d started to babble in his ear. He thought about what Magnus had said about them being “domestic.”  
Isak had never led a domestic life. He was born into a world full of turmoil, although, when he was really young, he thought it was normal. He was born to a father who never wanted him and was willing to throw him away. He was born to a mother who deteriorated in front of his eyes; a mother whom he pretended not to love for a while because going unloved and unaffected seemed easier than loving and getting hurt. He was born into a house that lasted a few months, born into six moves before he turned twelve. He was born into a closet that seemed impossible to leave. He was born an only child with few friends and pain in his chest that never really went away. No homecooked meals, no smiling faces, no long hugs or happy laughter. Even seemed to be all of these good things wrapped in one and times a million. Isak shifted Karoline. He realized he liked holding her. It made something warm spread through his belly.  
“There! Isn’t he pretty?” Cathrine squeaked. She’d smeared some sticky looking pink lipgloss over Even’s mouth and put some of the clips in his hair. He gave Isak a goofy smile.  
Giggling, Isak touched his hair. “He looks beautiful.”  
Karoline started to whimper. Her face got red. Looking at her, Isak felt panic spread through him again. He didn’t really know what to do when she wasn’t just staring at him.  
“I got her,” Even said, hopping up and taking her. He rubbed the baby girl’s back and whispered in her ear. “Isak, why don’t you and Cathrine put on a movie?”  
“Alright,” Isak said. Cathrine slipped her hand into his. It surprised him.  
“What do you want to watch?” she asked, her voice a high-pitched warble. She carefully edged her way down the stairs.  
“You can choose. What type of movies do you like?”  
“I like all the princesses, and I like the Jungle Book and I love Shrek!”  
“I like all those, too,” Isak agreed, even though he’d only ever seen Shrek and Mulan.  
“You have to put the movie on, cuz I’m too little to use the remote.”  
“Alright.”  
“Can we make popcorn?”  
“Yeah, sure,” Isak affirmed.  
“What’s your favorite color?”  
“I like blue.”  
“My eyes are blue!” Cathrine clapped her hands.  
“I know! So are Even’s!”  
“Karoline’s eyes are brown. And yours are,” she squinted up at him, “green.”  
“Ja.”  
“I like purple but I used to like pink, and mama won’t let me get a new purple blanket for my bed even though the one I have now is pink.”  
Isak didn’t really know how to reply. “I saw the pink one,” he finally said. “I think it’s really nice.”  
Cathrine glowed. “What are your friends like?” she asked.  
“Oh, um… well, by best friend’s name is Jonas. He likes skateboarding and he has curly hair. And then my best girl friend’s name is Eva. She had reddish hair and she likes, um… she likes makeup and stuff, I guess.” Isak couldn’t really tell Cathrine that Eva liked Gossip Girl, hanging around with her friends, and partying.  
“Can I see a picture?” Catherine asked.  
“Sure.” They sat down at the couch and Isak took out his phone. He scrolled through his photos until finding one of him, Even, Jonas, Eva and Noora.  
“See, that’s Jonas,” he said, zooming in. “And that’s Eva.”  
“She’s really pretty,” Cathrine sighed. “Who’s that?”  
“Oh, that’s Noora, my roommate.”  
“What’s a roommate?”  
“Um… it’s like when you live with somebody, but as friends.”  
“Why don’t you live with your mama and papa?” Cathrine stared at him expectantly. Isak took in a breath.  
“I, uh… my parents don’t… live together.”  
“Are they divorced?”  
Isak balked; how did she even know that word? He guessed it was so commonplace that most kids knew about it by her age. Her next words came as another surprise. “My parents are divorced.” She looked down at her lap. “My mama married my new papa when I was little. I don’t remember it. I don’t remember my old papa, either. But that’s okay, because my new papa is like my real papa.”  
“Oh…” Isak didn’t know if he should apologize or hug her or what. “My parents are, too. But they both live alone. And I live with Even, because I’m old enough and I love him.”  
Cathrine nodded. “You should always live with people you love. Can we watch Shrek, now?”  
Isak swallowed. “Yeah. I’ll put it on.”

A while later, Even still hadn’t come down. Cathrine was enthralled in her movie, and so Isak whispered he was going to check on him and slipped back upstairs.  
He found Even cooing to a wailing Karoline. “It’s okay, it’s okay, mama will be home soon!”  
“Halla,” Isak said smugly. Even spun around. “How’re things?”  
“Things are great!” Even exclaimed, flinching as Karoline let out a particularly loud scream. “Okay, so I’m not good with babies.” His face lit up. “Why don’t you take her?”  
“What? Even, in case you haven’t noticed, I’m worse than you.”  
“You seemed like a natural before,” Even laughed. He handed Isak the baby before he could object. Her sobs quieted in confusion before picking back up again.  
Glaring at Even, Isak balanced her on his hip. “Shhh,” he whispered. “You’re okay.” He ran one hand over her soft head. Even stared as if mesmerized but Isak didn’t notice.  
He thought back to what used to make him feel better as a kid. He always liked when his mom sang to him but he couldn’t sing for shit. Still, it seemed to be worth a shot.  
“In every heart,” he started in English, singing one of the few songs he knew. “There is a room… a sanctuary safe and strong.” He caught Even looking at him and flushed. “To heal the wounds… from lovers past… until a new one comes along.”  
Even came up behind them and rested one hand on Isak’s lower back. “I spoke to you… in cautious tones… you answered me with no pretense… and, still, I feel… I said too much… my silence is my self defense.”  
Isak felt Even’s soft kisses on his neck. He tried not to let it distract him. “And every time… I’ve held a rose… it seems I only felt the thorns… and so it goes…. and so it goes… and so will you soon I suppose.”  
Even’s grip got tighter and he pulled away. “But if my silence… made you leave… then that would be my worst mistake.” Isak looked into Even’s eyes. Neither of them noticed that Karoline had stopped crying. “So I will share… this room with you… and you can have this heart to break.”  
Isak’s face was on fire as he carefully balanced the baby girl in his hips and stood flush to Even, chin tilted upward. “And this is why… my eyes are closed… it’s just as well for all I’ve seen… and so it goes… and so it goes… and you’re the only one who knows.”  
Even brought one hand to Isak’s face and stroked his cheek with his thumb.  
“So I would choose… to be with you… that’s if the choice were mine to make… but you can make… decisions too… and you can have this heart to break.”  
Isak took a deep, stuttering breath. “And so it goes… and so it goes…” he put his other hand on Even’s waist. “And you’re the only one who knows.”  
They stared at each other. After a moment, Even pulled Isak into him tight. “Thank you,” he whispered.  
Isak nuzzled his face into Even’s neck. “I love you,” he said.  
“I love you, too.”  
Pulling away, they kissed softly. Isak’s stomach rose into his chest.  
“Even! Isak! Can you come turn the volume up please!”  
Pulling away, they smiled. “Coming!” Even shouted back to Cathrine. 

By the time Even’s and the girls’ parents got back home, Cathrine and Karoline were both asleep. Isak and Even were chilling (making out) on the couch. When they heard the door open, they pulled apart and rushed up. After a few pleasantries and nice-to-meet-yous, they headed home.  
“So you really liked them?” Even asked from his position above Isak, whose head was on his chest. Isak didn’t feel much like talking. He felt hollowed out. Something about experiencing such simple, homey pleasures had drained him.  
Still, though, he nodded. “I did,” he whispered, voice scratchy.  
“You were great with them.”  
“You were better.”  
Even chuckled and pressed a soft kiss to Isak’s head. He pulled away, though, when he heard the younger boy sniffle. “I’m sorry,” Isak whispered, wiping at his eyes. “I- I just-”  
Even took his hand. He ran his thumb over Isak’s knuckles. “I know,” he promised. The younger boy looked up at him. Isak looked so small and vulnerable in that moment. He was so tired of Isak hurting. “But you’re home now.”  
Pressing his face into Even’s chest, Isak let his tears slowly blot out. He sighed as Even smoothed back his hair and rubbed his back. “I love you.”  
“I love you, too.”  
That wasn’t enough. Isak wrapped his arms around Even’s middle. “I love you,” he repeated. “I love you.”  
“Baby?”  
Isak looked up. Even reached over into the drawer of the bedside table and grabbed a small, black velvet bag.  
“What’s that?”  
“Have you ever heard of promise rings?”  
Furrowing his brow, Isak nodded.  
Even swallowed. “I know we’ve always said minute by minute, but…” he sighed. “These don’t mean much. We already know in our hearts. But I need you to feel like you have a home. Because you’ve been lost for so long.”  
He shook two, tiny silver bands into his hand. “I… I bought them when I was manic. After I came down and realized what that meant, I… I didn’t plan on giving it to you. Even to me, it seems like a lot. So if you don’t wanna, I understand. It’s kind of a big deal. But… Isak, if you do want to…”  
Isak took one of the rings. He examined it. “In a month and a half, it will be our one year anniversary.” They’d settled on celebrating on the first of November, the day they’d spent in bed together. The first time they’d found home.  
“That’s true,” Even said. “I get that it’s early. But I just… I need you to feel like you have a home now. I know you already know it, with me, but… a ring couldn’t hurt.”  
Isak shut his eyes. He let out a soft sigh. “In this minute,” he said, “I’m going to put on this ring. I can’t tell you whether or not I’ll freak out in the morning and take it off, but, in this minute… I want to wear it. Forever. Everywhere.”  
Smiling silently, Even slipped it onto his finger. “I love you,” he whispered.  
“I love you, too.”  
Even put his own ring on. He’d felt silly after realizing he’d bought them. It seemed like far too much, far too old fashioned and, honestly, far too optimistic. But so what if Isak made him bigger and better and more positive?  
Humans imitate each other. Even knew that. The human race is a memetic one, but we can either go about out imitations unconsciously or we can choose to imitate those we respect. Those who are good. Those who are kind.  
Those who love.  
And, so, now, with this boy wearing a practically meaningless ring wrapped in his arms, Even didn’t feel silly at all. “I love you,” he said again, even though Isak had fallen asleep.  
It didn’t matter. Even would say it no matter what state Isak was in. Because it would always be true, in every universe, in every minute. 

The next morning, when Isak stirred awake, Even was staring down at him again. He tilted his chin to the older boy with a sleepy pout.  
“Halla.”  
“Halla.”  
Isak smiled a soft smile. “I love you, too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Halla babes, so I'm sooo pleased with all your suggestions! I'm definitely going to continue working my way through them. I was very ify on the promise rings one because when I read it I was like FUCK YEAH but then I was like "but minute by minute..." and I was also worried I wouldn't be able to write it without it seeming cheesy/unrealistic/OOC. I hope it turned out okay!  
> The thing about humans being memitic was something I discussed in poetry workshop today and I thought it was incredibly interesting and it gave me even more to think about in my goal of leading my life with kindness and love, so I thought I'd share. I also just found out I got into the Iowa Young Writers Studio for this summer, which is a writing program at Iowa State- which has the most highly-acclaimed creative writing program in the US- that only takes 20% of the applicants, today!! I'm so so excited and I really love writing this story, so I'm definitely going to continue to use it to hone my skills and make myself and hopefully you guys happy!!  
> Love you all!!!


	40. Chapter forty

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Isak wants to redecorate, group trip to IKEA ensues

Chapter 40  
When Even walked into their room with two mugs of coffee, Isak was standing with his hands on his hips, staring at the wall.   
“Halla?” he said, setting the mugs down. Isak didn’t reply, so Even walked up behind him and tried to follow his gaze. “What are you looking at?”  
“This is my room,” Isak said definitively, turning to Even. The older boy raised his eyebrows.   
“Is this your way of kicking me out?” he joked, making Isak roll his eyes.   
“Nei, but, like…” he gestured around. “This is my room. We haven’t really changed anything since you started living here.”  
It was true. Where the poster of the girl in the bathing suit had once hung there were now several of Even’s doodles, but, otherwise, the room was pretty much the same as it had been the first time Even had come over.   
“We don’t even have a bookshelf,” Isak continued. “All your books are just in a pile.”   
“Do you want to buy a bookshelf?” Even laughed. Isak glared at him.   
“I want this to be our room! We’ve been living together for eight months and it still looks like my room!”  
Still smiling, Even pressed a kiss to Isak’s temple. “IKEA trip?” he suggested.   
“I feel bad you’ll be paying for it,” the smaller boy mumbled. Even laughed.   
“It’s for my books.”  
“I know but it was my idea and we’ll probably end up getting other stuff and…”  
“Isak,” Even made his boyfriend look at him. “I have a job and wealthy parents. You have neither. Let me buy us some stuff.”  
Isak hated when Even was right. 

Turns out their IKEA trip ended up becoming a group thing.   
It started because Isak texted on the group chat that he was about to go buy some Alice’s and Lucas’s, referencing Jonas’s theory that IKEA just used Swedish names for their furniture. But that escalated. 

Magnus: What??!!  
Isak: we’re going to ikea  
Magnus: omg I LOVE ikea!!! Can I come??   
Isak: why the hell do you want to come to ikea  
Magnus: the foooddddd  
Isak: um  
Even: of course you can come mags   
Mahdi: wait let me in this, their meatballs are so good  
Isak: why do you all have such low standards  
Isak: stop creeping into my love life  
Mahdi: dude your love life needs some help if it takes place at ikea  
Even: he’s right, issy  
Even: please send help guys  
Even: he’s only interested in me for my bookshelf picking out skills at this point  
Isak: funny.   
Even: thank you  
Jonas: wait you’re all going to ikea?  
Magnus: dude you should totally come  
Jonas: I mean I don’t really want to but if you’re all going   
Jonas: why ikea?  
Isak: we had to buy a bookshelf and of course everybody jumped on board  
Magnus: your fault for putting it in the group chat  
Mahdi: yeah don’t expect us not to crash if you tell us you’re going to ikea  
Even: right again  
Isak: Even I’m going to remove you from this groupchat  
Magnus: why are you guys texting  
Magnus: aren’t you in the same room  
Isak: we’re not ALWAYS together mags  
Even: *picture of Isak hunched over his phone on their bed a foot away*  
Isak Valtersen removed Even Bech Næsheim from this groupchat.   
Jonas Vasquez added Even Bech Næsheim to this groupchat.  
Isak: fuck you man  
Jonas: we need him now  
Jonas: we’re in too deep  
Isak: stfu  
Even: see everyone in an hour?  
Magnus: sounds good  
Mahdi: I’m psyched  
Jonas: same

They planned to meet in the front entrance. Evak got there first. Isak was in his white and black checkered shirt over a white tshirt and skinny jeans. His hair was covered by the white snapback and Even was trying to pull his curls out one-by-one while the smaller boy grumpily swatted at his hand when Magnus walked up.   
“Broooooos,” the blond boy exclaimed, throwing his arms around them both at once. They’d seen each other literally last week.   
Even laughed good-naturedly and hugged Magnus back while Isak squirmed. Once his friend had pulled away, he adjusted his shirt and glared.   
“What’s up your ass?” he heard, and turned to see Mahdi smiling widely.   
“Mahdi!” Magnus was excited again, hugging again. Mahdi laughed. “Dude, it’s been agessss,” Magnus drawled.   
Isak rolled his eyes. “You’re such a sap, Maggie,” he mumbled, trying to keep the smile off of his face. Just then, somebody shouted into his ear and he jumped half a foot.   
“Fuck you,” he laughed, shoving Jonas’s chest. The dark haired boy smiled and playfully pushed him back. Magnus shoved his way in between them and hugged Jonas, too.   
Once everyone was reunited, the squad started to make their way through the store. It was huge. Isak always got a headache in places like this, but, with his friends and Even there, it didn’t seem so daunting.   
“Do you like this one?” Even asked for the millionth time, running his hand over a white bookshelf.   
“I don’t care,” Isak replied for the millionth time.   
Even gave him that scolding look and replied, “If you want it to be our room, we gotta pick something we like.”  
Isak huffed. “Well… that one’s white. And the bed is brown.”   
Even grinned. “See? Look how much more productive you are when you give it any thought at all.”  
Narrowing his eyes, Isak glared at the older boy. 

A while later, after picking out a moderately-priced brown bookshelf and getting it approved by the squad, they ended up looking at lamps. The small black booklamp on Isak’s yellow bedside table wasn’t really cutting it.   
As Isak ran his fingers along the stand of a floor lamp when suddenly Magnus grabbed his hand. He stared at it with such shock that Isak was actually worried for a moment.   
“Mags?”  
Magnus didn’t respond. Instead he opted to drag Isak over to wear Jonas, Mahdi and Even were standing and grab Even’s hand, too. He held them next to each other.   
Oh. The rings. Isak had nearly forgotten.   
They’d been wearing them for a while few days now. Isak did, indeed, freak out the morning after agreeing to it. He loved Even but that sort of commitment seemed terrifying. But Even calmed him down. “You only have to wear it for this minute. If you change your mind in the next one, take it off. It’s not a commitment. I promise I won’t be mad, no matter what you do.”  
And so, slowly, Isak had adjusted to wearing it. Of course Eskild had nearly broken the windows with his squealing when he noticed them.   
But now the boys were all staring at them in complete silence. Until, that is, Magnus all but shouted, “The fuck, are you guys fucking engaged?!”  
Isak snatched his hand away. “Nei, you idiot.”  
“What the hell are these, then?” Magnus sputtered, gesturing wildly to Even’s ring. Isak blushed.   
“They’re… promise rings,” he mumbled.   
Jonas stared at them in utter shock. Mahdi’s mouth dropped into his signature grin.   
“Are you fucking with me right now?” asked Magnus. “Are you fucking with me? This is too fucking much.”  
Isak kept his eyes cast down. Even was beaming.   
“Holy fuck, you guys! Holy fuck! You’re gonna get married and it’s gonna be so beautiful and holy fucking hell you’re so perfect, fucking stop-” Magnus babbled, eyes wide.   
“Promise rings?” laughed Mahdi. “What- what even is this, this is romcom shit, what the fuck?”  
“I bought them when I was manic,” Even explained for Isak, who clearly wanted to justify the rings put didn’t want to tell them if Even was uncomfortable.   
“So?” Magnus butted in. “Who gives a flying fuck?! That actually makes it better, all your feelings are going fucking crazy and you buy fucking promise rings oh my god-”  
“Guysss,” Isak whined.  
Jonas, finally getting over his surprise, let out a bark of laughter and grabbed Isak’s hand. “Dude, you’re wearing a fucking promise ring. Dude.”  
“Shut up,” Isak groaned.   
“This is, like, the precursor to engagement!” Magnus practically shouted. “You guys are, like, engaged!”  
Jonas picked up Even’s hand, too, comparing the rings. “Fuck,” he laughed. “Fuck. This is so much.”  
“Wait, hold still,” Magnus ordered. Jonas turned to him and held up the two hands by his face and made a shocked expression. Magnus snapped a picture. A second later, all their phones pinged. The picture showed up on the big group chat with all the girls- “megasquad”- with the caption “promise rings. Evak can’t be stopped.”  
“Ugh, Mags,” Isak groaned.   
The girls immediately started to respond. 

Eva: OH MY FUCKING GOD  
Eva: STOPPPPP  
Vilde: That is so cute<3<3 omg you guys!  
Sana: congratulations, boys;)  
Sana: I knew this day would come  
Isak: no you fucking didn’t  
Vilde: Sana knows  
Eva: Sana always knows  
Noora: omg when did this happen?  
Even: like a week ago  
Noora: and I didn’t notice??!!  
Isak: you’ve been busy with your boyfriend  
Noora: aww are you feeling neglected  
Isak: lol no  
Isak: more like grateful  
Noora: *middle finger emoji*  
Chris: omg Isak can I be your best man?!!  
Chris: revive the electric chemistry  
Isak: we’re not getting married  
Chris: yet  
Vilde: I’ll be the flower girl omg!  
Jonas: um chris obviously I’m the best man  
Chris: then I’ll be Even’s  
Magnus: I got dibbs  
Chris: fuck  
Chris: then I’ll be a groomsman  
Noora: I think Eskild’s gonna be pissed he’s not bestman  
Isak: he can be the fucking preist for all I care  
Even: that’s hurtful baby  
Eva: BABY  
Eva: IT NEVER GETS OLD  
Eva: even I’ll marry you right now  
Isak: ummmmm  
Eva: even I’m ready  
Vilde: ummmmmmmm  
Magnus: we’d all marry even  
Magnus: of course the least grateful of us gets him  
Isak: I am very grateful?!  
Even: he shows me every night;)  
Isak: ughhh

At this point, Isak looked up and punched Even’s shoulder. They were finally in the foodcourt line.   
“What?” Even laughed. “It’s true.”   
Magnus, Mahdi and Jonas laughed from in front of them. Isak whined again. “Not every night, dickface.”  
“Mmhmm,” Even replied sarcastically, eyebrows raised.   
Isak felt his cheeks get red. “Well certainly not tonight,” he remarked, earning a shocked gasp. Even slung one arm around his shoulders and tried to kiss his cheek but Isak wiggled away, giggling.

By the time they left, they had a new lamp, a bookshelf, some posters, a potted plant and stuffed pig that Even had insisted on buying. They and the other boys went their separate ways.   
They got home as the sun was setting and carefully set up the new room, with Noora’s help. The bookshelf got loaded with books. The laundry got put away- that wasn’t really thanks to anything they’d bought, it was just long overdue- and the posters got put up. There were a couple of Even’s favorite movies and a few landscapes. Even also had some of his artsy pictures printed and taped up decoratively. There were a few pictures of him and Isak up there. Okay, a lot. Okay, 99% of them were pictures of him and Isak.  
After they were done, they collapsed into bed, exhausted. Even wrapped both arms around Isak, pressing tiny kisses to the nape of his neck. He rested his hands under Isak’s shirt on his warm tummy.   
“Stop,” Isak whined when Even began sucked on his earlobe. He felt his stomach tingle when Even ran his tongue alone it.   
“Nei, you said I’m not getting any tonight and I want to prove you wrong.”  
Isak giggled when Even bit down on his neck gently. “No means no,” he reminded the older boy. Even popped his lower lip out in a pout.   
“C’mon, baby, don’t you wanna fuck in our room for the first time?”  
Isak swallowed. “Nei.”  
Turning Isak to face him, Even pressed their foreheads together. “Please?”  
Sighing, Isak put one hand on Even’s neck. He rubbed their noses together before silently pressing his mouth to Even’s. The older boy’s grip around his back got stronger as he pulled them closer together. Isak smiled into the kiss and opened his mouth, allowing Even to slip in his tongue.   
“Mmmm, love that all your friends think we’re gonna get married,” Even sighed.   
“Does… does it turn you on?” Isak asked shyly. Even smiled.   
“Fuck yeah. Love that they know you’re mine, baby boy.”  
Isak felt his blush spread into his ears. Even gently tugged on his hair and brought their mouths back together.   
Rolling so he was slightly on top of Isak, Even grinded his hips into the younger boys, sticking one leg between Isak’s. He sensually sucked on Isak’s lower lip before dragging his tongue along it. Moving away from his mouth, Even started to suck marks on Isak’s jaw and neck.   
“Even,” Isak sighed, arching his back.   
“You’re so beautiful, baby,” Even whispered, breath ghosting Isak’s ear.   
Just then, Eskild barged in. Isak swore and shoved Even off of him. “Fuck, haven’t you heard of knocking?”  
“I did knock,” Eskild said pointedly. “Nobody answered so I assumed you weren’t in here. I wanted to check the place out.”  
He walked in and plopped down beside them. Isak sighed and flopped his head back into the pillow. He was half-hard and frustrated.   
“It looks good!” Eskild commented. Even grinned.   
“Thank you. It was all Isak’s idea.”  
“Isak?” Eskild repeated in surprise. “Our Isak? Grumpy Isak was responsible and romantic?”  
“Eskild,” Isak said flatly.   
“I’m just saying,” Eskild replied. Even laughed. He went back to rubbing Isak’s belly.   
By the time Eskild left neither boy was feeling it anymore. Instead of fucking, the decided to cuddle. Even smiled as he felt Isak fall asleep in his arms. He ran one thumb over Isak’s hipbone. It was still too sharp for his liking; he still worried when Isak couldn’t meet his eye in the food court because he could hardly finish his meatballs. But everyday they were saving each other. In this day, they’d come together even more.


	41. Chapter forty-one

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Isak is moody, Even is annoyed, smut in the end

Chapter 41  
Isak was in a mood.  
He got that way, sometimes. Pissed about everything. Ridiculously irritable. Full of snappish remarks and angry answers to simple questions.  
It was… annoying. To say the least. And Even could never get him out of it easily.  
This week he’d been grumpy and ill-tempered practically twenty-four seven. He wasn’t mean per say. He was just… he was always ready pounce.  
And Even was done.  
“Babe, there’s literally no food. I thought you were going to go shopping?” Isak was shouting from the kitchen now. Even rolled his eyes. He stood up from the bed and padded out.  
“Did you say something?”  
“Um, yeah?” Isak replied, swiveling his head to glare at Even. “I asked why there’s no food?”  
Even sighed. “I got home from work late and-”  
Isak huffed, cutting Even off. The older boy quieted and stared at him. “What?” he asked eventually.  
“You’ve gotten home late, like, seven thousand times this week.”  
“Um.” Even stared at him. “Um, I have not.” He continued to watch as Isak jerked open the fridge. “What… what is going on with you?”  
Isak shot him an annoyed look. “Nothing.”  
Shaking his head incredulously, Even all but laughed, “Are you just, like, acting this way for attention?”  
At this, Isak slammed the fridge shut and looked at him. “Don’t talk to me like I’m a fucking child, Even.”  
Nearly smiling now, Even walked over and grabbed Isak by the hips. The younger boy wiggled and tried to shove him away, but Even held tight. “Are you feeling neglected? Is that it?”  
Scoffing, Isak squirmed. “Stop trying to fucking- get off of me, Even!”  
Smile falling, Even let go. “Why are you acting like such a brat?”  
“Don’t fucking patronize me!” Isak spat, redness spreading through his face. Even let out a small breath and shook his head.  
“That’s how you’re acting. Why are you upset?”  
“I-I’m just in a bad mood and then you come in and, and ask me if I’m acting this way for attention and-” he sputtered to nothing.  
Swallowing his pride for the moment, Even nodded. “Okay. You’re right, I shouldn’t have said that. I’m sorry. But you’ve been upset all week. Can you please just tell me what’s up?”  
“Maybe if you bought food and got home on time I wouldn’t be so pissed!” Isak barked.  
“Okay, why do you want to be mad at me right now?” Even replied, furrowing his brow.  
“Because you treat me like a child!” Isak curled his hands into fists. Even almost commented on the fact that he was literally throwing a fit as they spoke but decided against it.  
“I’m sorry that I’ve made you feel that way, but I don’t try to treat you like a child. I certainly don’t think you’re one.”  
“Really?! One of the first things you ever said to me in our relationship was ‘I forgot how young you are’! You called me a brat and told me I’m just acting out for attention in this conversation alone!”  
“Okay, the first thing wasn’t meant to be insulting! I was half kidding and I like that you’re younger than me, you’re my baby, and the I shouldn’t have patronized you but I’m just trying to figure out why you’re upset!”  
Isak stared at the ground. “Whatever, Even.”  
“No, not whatever. Please tell me what’s bothering you. We’ve been through this a million times. You cannot keep hiding.”  
Deflating slightly, Isak dug his fingernails into his palms. “This isn’t like that,” he promised.  
Even stared at him. “Then what is this? You’re just moody for the sake of it?”  
Isak ground his jaw. “It’s embarrassing.”  
“So?” Even prompted. He stepped forward and cautiously put his hands on Isak’s shoulders. “Tell me.”  
“I… you start school next week.”  
Pushing back some of Isak’s hair, Even tilted his head. “And? I’m not going anywhere, baby.”  
“Yeah, but… what if… I don’t know, what if you realize… I’m too immature for you?”  
Sighing a long, relieved sigh, Even pulled Isak close. “Is that what all this is about? I told you I’m not going anywhere, sweetheart. Certainly not gonna find somebody new.”  
“But you don’t know that, Even, and- and you can’t be sure that you’re not going to meet some smart film student who’ll know everything and impress you and-” Isak protested into his chest, weakly trying to pull away. He gently his hit palm against Even’s chest before giving up and letting the older boy gently cup that back of his head. They stood there in the kitchen, wrapped up in each other, rocking slightly back-and-forth.  
“I promise,” Even sighed after a moment. “I love you for you. I don’t think you’re immature, Isak. You’re two years younger than me, not ten. And… if you think anybody else could compete with you, you’ve seriously missed something. I’m so gone for you I’m surprised I’m still on this earth.”  
Isak let out a soft laugh into Even’s shirt. “I’m sorry for freaking out and being an asshole,” he mumbled after a beat. “I’m sorry for not talking to you.”  
“It’s okay,” Even easily forgave him. This, indeed, wasn’t like the other issues they’d been working through. He could see why Isak was embarrassed. For now, he just needed to focus on reassuring him. “We’re okay.”  
Pulling away slightly and looking down, Even made eye contact with his boy. Isak still looked embarrassed. Pressing a soft kiss to his mouth, Even leaned their foreheads together.  
“Are you okay now?” Blushing, Isak nodded. Even smiled. “Good. What do you want to do?”  
Isak shrugged. “Whatever.”  
“Okay. Let me make you dinner and let’s go to bed. I’ll try to manage, even though we have no food,” he joked gently, making Isak give up a soft eye roll. The smaller boy hopped up and the kitchen counter and watched quietly as Even started to prepare something.  
As he did so, Noora walked in the front door with William behind her. William was smiling and laughing, something Isak could never get used to seeing.  
“Hei,” Noora said happily as they walked in. She smiled at the boys.  
“Halla, guys,” Even said happily. Isak nodded.  
“What are you making?” the blonde girl asked, peeking over Even’s shoulder.  
“Just some sandwiches. Want some?”  
Shrugging, Noora turned to William. He shook his head with an, “I’m fine, thanks.”  
“We’ll probably eat later,” Noora added. She looked at Isak. “By the way, have you spoken to Eva?”  
Wrinkling his forehead, Isak asked, “Why? Is she looking for me?”  
“She said she wanted to ask you about something,” Noora replied. Isak tried to think of what it could be before grabbing his phone. 

Isak: Halla, Noora said you wanted to talk to me??  
Isak stared at his phone.  
Eva: (...)  
Eva: Yes! I wanted to hang before school starts again  
Isak: oh ok. What do you wanna do?  
Eva: idk  
Eva: I can’t talk rn, we’ll figure it out later?  
Isak: ok

“Here,” Even said, handing Isak a plate. The smaller boy took it and hopped off of the counter. He gave Noora and William a half wave before disappearing into their room.  
Settling into bed beside Even, he bit into his sandwich. “Sorry for freaking out before,” he said softly, still feeling bad. Even sighed through his nose and smiled fondly, putting one hand on his knee.  
“It’s okay. Seriously. Do you want to watch something?”  
Isak nodded. Even set something up and they snuggled up close to each other. Once his sandwich was eaten and the movie was halfway over, he let his mind drift.  
Another thing had been bothering him lately.  
They’d only had sex twice since Even’s- and his, kind of- episode. That was twice in four fucking weeks. And both times had been rushed. Isak didn’t like admitting that he was desperate for his boyfriend’s dick but, well… he was desperate for his boyfriend’s dick.  
“Even,” he mumbled, looking up at the older boy.  
“Hmm?” replied Even, eyes glued to the screen. Isak sighed and inched his way up to Even’s neck, pressing a soft kiss to it and then another. He reached his jaw and starting peppering kisses up to his ear.  
“What are you doing?” asked Even as he shifted under Isak’s wight. The smaller boy smiled.  
“What does it feel like?”  
Putting one hand on his waist, Even turned Isak to face him. “It feels like you wanna fuck.”  
Isak blushed and nodded. Shaking his head, Even pressed his forehead to his boyfriend’s. “You could’ve just asked, baby.”  
“That’s no fun,” Isak whispered back. He pushed Even down and climbed on top of him, straddling the older boy’s waist.  
Just then, a knock sounded at their door. “Isak? Even?” Noora’s pretty voice rang through.  
“Busy,” Isak shouted back, taking off his shirt and leaning down to meet Even’s waiting mouth. He shivered as the taller boy plunged his tongue into his mouth, curling his fingers through the back of his hair.  
“Okay, could I just borrow some of your eggs?” Noora continued. Instead of answering, Isak panted into Even’s mouth as he started grinding his half-hard dick into Isak’s crotch.  
“Fuck, Even,” he groaned.  
There was a beat of silence and then Noora said, “I’m just gonna take them.” Isak hardly heard her footsteps disappear.  
“Mm, been too long, baby,” Even said, running his thumbs along Isak’s hips. The smaller boy whimpered in agreement.  
Unbuckling Isak’s pants, Even started to strip him. Isak shimmied so he could push them and his boxers off.  
“What do you want, baby?” Even whispered, flipping them over. Isak trembled.  
“I want your cock, Even, god,” he whined, arching his back as Even hovered above him and grinded their hips together.  
“What do you say?” the he asked.  
Pushing Even so that he was sitting up on his knees, Isak lifted the hem of his shirt, pressing a soft kiss to his lower stomach.  
“You say please,” he whispered, voice breathy. Even watched, mesmerized, as he continued kissing his stomach, making his way to his abs and slowly and pulling up his shirt as he went.  
“You say please, Even, please stuff me up with your cock. Make me shake underneath you.” Isak’s flush had spread through his whole body out of shyness but, god, he was willing to do anything to turn Even on further. He needed him. Now. The older boy shuddered at his words and his touch. Isak got onto his knees, too, and removed Even’s shirt entirely, kissing his neck, sucking on it tenderly, lips making popping noises as he moved higher.  
“You say please, make me hard. Please fill me with your come.” With that, Isak licked Even’s Adam’s apple, which was prominent as Even stared at the ceiling and panted. Their faces finally became even again. Isak wrapped his arms around Even’s neck and forced them to make eye contact. “You say please. I need you to fuck me.”  
Overwhelmed, Even grabbed Isak’s waist and slammed him back into the mattress.  
“What … do … you say?” the younger boy panted, eyes shut as Even sucked on his nipples.  
“You say please let me touch you. Please let me suck on you skin and bite your nipples,” Even murmured back. He sucked down Isak’s chest and licked his hard, leaking cock.  
“No … fair …” the smaller boy panted, bucking his pelvis involuntarily as Even ran his tongue along his slit.  
“Hmm?” the older boy hummed back.  
“Now I’m… naked … and you’re still- wearing your pants.”  
Even smiled and took Isak in his mouth, earning a high-pitched whine as he undid his own pants and kicked them aside. Isak arched his back further, digging his fingernails into the mattress. Even held him down and pulled away, eliciting a pitiful whimpering sound from Isak, who reach down to touch himself. Even grabbed his wrist and pushed it away. “Not tonight,” he ordered, staring Isak down. The smaller boy complied but whined louder, eyes misty and dark.  
“Please, please, Even, I need you so bad, fuck,” he rambled as Even leaned down and pressed a kiss to his stomach, making Isak squeal as he roughly shoved his tongue into his belly button.  
Even grabbed for the lube and rubbed some along Isak’s tight hole. “On your knees, baby,” he commanded. Isak obeyed immediately.  
“Ugh, you’re so gorgeous,” Even groaned as he ran his hands over Isak’s body. He stuck one finger inside of him and Isak moaned out his name, biting down on his lower lip. Even added a second finger and started scissoring him, opening him up. Isak felt like he was on fire as he squeezed shut his eyes and let out choked cries.  
“Even, fuck, god it’s so good,” he moaned.  
“Yeah? And you think I’d do this to just anyone? Think I’d meet someone older and treat them this good?”  
“Nei,” Isak cried. “Nei, I know.”  
“That’s right nei,” Even affirmed, adding a third finger and pumping in and out of him. “You’re my baby, got it, Issy?”  
“Mmmhmm,” Isak moaned into their pillow.  
“Nobody gets this treatment but you.”  
“Yes, Even, yess.”  
“And do you spread your ass like this for anyone else?” the older boy asked, pulling out his fingers and positioning himself. He waited for Isak’s reply.  
“No, no, just you, only you,” Isak sobbed. “Always you.”  
“Good,” said Even before pushing in. Isak cried out. He was already so fucking close.  
“Feels so good, baby boy,” Even said, voice strained as he slowly started to thrust in and out of Isak.  
Even continued moving in and out of him, grabbing Isak’s hips and pulling himself deeper. They moaned in unison as Even hit Isak’s sweet spot hard.  
“I’m close, baby,” Even warned. Isak nodded. The older boy slammed in and out of him, surely bruising him. Isak knew somewhere that he’d be sore tomorrow but who gave a fuck?  
He was painfully hard and as soon as Even hit his prostate again he found himself coming all over the bed. He felt liquid heat filling up his ass at the same moment and realized through the haze that he and Even had come in sync.  
After about five breathless minutes, Even pulled out. “I’m sorry,” he whispered in response to Isak’s whimper, pressing a kiss to the small of his back. He gently laid the smaller boy on his back and smiled at his dazed expression.  
“I’ll get a rag,” he said, standing and slipping away. Isak stared at him as he pulled on sweatpants and walked out of the room.  
By the time they were both clean and Even had replaced the blanket, Isak was cuddled into his boyfriend’s side. Even clicked resume on the movie they’d forgotten about and smoothed back his hair.  
“How could you think I’d replace you?” the older boy asked after a moment, some amusement in his voice.  
“I don’t know,” Isak groaned, hiding his face. “I’m an idiot.”  
“That’s true,” Even laughed. “But you’re my idiot.”  
Isak huffed and hid his smile.


	42. Chapter forty-two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Isak has to get his wisdom teeth removed and is very doped up afterwards

Chapter 42  
“I don’t wanna do this,” Isak said, staring at the ground. He was white as a ghost.   
“I know, sweet boy, but you gotta,” Even sighed back, running his fingers through Isak’s soft hair. The younger boy melted slightly into this touch, but he was still tense as fuck.   
They were in waiting room chairs at the dentist’s office. Isak had to have his wisdom teeth removed.   
“I’m gonna pass out. I always do,” he said, shaking his head. Even smiled softly and pulled him a little closer.   
“I promise it’ll be okay. A million people go through this everyday.”  
“I’m not afraid of dying, Even,” Isak mumbled with an eye roll, “I’m afraid of it hurting.”  
“Isak?” somebody said, walking out. Isak immediately went from slouched to sitting up pin-straight. “Isak Valtersen?”  
“You’ll be okay,” murmured Even, smoothing back his hair one final time. Isak stood and walked rigidly to the door.   
As the woman lead him inside, he gave Even one last pleading look. And then the door closed.   
Even smiled fondly before hopping up and walking out. He’d be back in a while to pick Isak up.   
In the meantime, he ran some errands and then hung out with Eskild some. “Are you excited to see Isak?” the older boy asked at one point. Even rose his eyebrows.   
“As excited as usual. Why?”  
“Because he’ll be all mushy and stupid!” Eskild explained, waving his hands wildly. “Drunk Isak was the best. Well, when he wasn’t angry. He was such a cutie. And now you’ll get to see it basically!”  
Even laughed through the wave of is-he-not-having-fun-for-my-sake-am-I-dragging-him-own-am-I-hurting-him and then checked the clock. “I gotta head out now or I’ll be late,” he said. “Wanna come?”  
“Nah,” Eskild replied, “I’ll let you have that delectable little slice to yourself.”  
Still chuckling, Even stood up and headed out. He got back to the dentist’s in fifteen minutes.   
He had to sit in the waiting room again for a little while but then a nurse was leading Isak out and. Oh boy.   
Isak was staring at the nurse’s face with such interest that Even couldn’t help but smile. She was nodding at him gently in a way that seemed practice. And then Isak’s head swiveled slightly to the side and he caught Even’s eye.   
“Babbbyyyy!” he all but shouted, tripping across the room and then practically collapsing into Even’s lap. Even felt his wet lips on his neck, his hands gripping his shirt, but then he was pulling away- no, pushing Even away and mumbling, “No we’re in public, get offa me,” with a dopey smile on his face.   
“Sorry,” Even laughed, holding Isak’s shoulders and standing them both up. Isak slung his arms around Even’s neck as if he was trying to drag him to the ground. “So how was it?”  
Isak pulled back and looked up at him. “Oh,” he said, eyes filling with tears so fast that Even actually got worried. “Oh, it was horrible.” He pressed his face back into his boyfriend;s shirt and Even felt wetness spreading against his chest. “I was so scared.”  
The nurse came up to Even and patted his shoulder gently. “So he was a little… tense about the whole thing. We had to give him so more anesthetic than normal.”  
“Yeah,” Even laughed. Isak’s face wasn’t as puffy as he’d anticipated, but he was a lot more doped up.   
Isak wrapped his arms around Even’s waist now and squeezed. “I wanna go home, Ev,” he mumbled.   
“Are you his…” the nurse continued. Even tucked Isak’s head under his chin.   
“Boyfriend,” he finished.   
“Okay. And you live together?”  
“Yeah.”  
Smiling, the nurse checked her clipboard. “Great. So just change his gauze every couple of hours, only give him liquids, and make sure he gets lots of rest,” she said. Even nodded.   
“Sounds great.”  
The took the bus home but Isak was certainly not his normal, reserved self. He was leaning on Even’s side, practically falling into his lap. He was very… loud, too.   
“Baby, I don’t want you to go,” he slurred, wrapping both his hands in Even’s.   
“I’m not going anywhere,” the older boy laughed, staring at Isak fondly. “We live together, remember?”   
At this, Isak pulled away and stared at him momentarily before a huge smile broke over his face. “We do!” he exclaimed, knocking his forehead into Even’s. His smile faded as he focused his eyes on what seemed to be Even’s nose. “I want fried rice,” he said after a moment.   
“No solids,” Even gently reminded him. Isak’s gaze shot back up to his face.   
“What?”  
“You can’t have solid food.”  
“Why?”   
“You had your wisdom teeth removed, baby.”   
Eyes darting around in confusion, Isak’s mouth dropped open. He looked back up after a moment. “I don’t even remember that,” he whispered seriously.   
“That’s alright,” Even said back, petting his hair. “We’ll be home soon.”  
Immediately pacified, Isak snuggled back into Even’s side.   
When they got home, Even all but dragged Isak up the stairs. As soon as they reached the door, Isak slammed it open and and shouted, “We’re home!”  
“Shhh,” Even chuckled, “shhh.”   
“Shhhh,” Isak repeated back more clumsily, bringing his finger up to his lips.   
Even’s face wrinkled up with his smile and he couldn’t help but press a kiss to Isak’s soft forehead.   
“You’re so cute, you and your cute smile,” Isak blabbered, pressing sloppy kisses to Even’s cheek.   
“You’re pretty cute too, sweetheart,” Even replied, wrapping his arms around Isak’s waist.   
Just then, Noora walked out to get something to eat. “Hei,” she said, raising one eyebrow. “You’re back.”  
Isak turned his head slowly towards her voice and lit up. “Noooora,” he said happily, not moving his head from Even’s chest. “You’re so pretty.”  
She drew her lips into a thin line and raised her eyebrows. “Hear that, Even?” she asked, turning to the cabinets. “You’ve got some competition.”  
“Nei,” Isak laughed. “Even’s the man of my dreams, remember? Man of my dreams.” He wiped the smile off of his face and stared up at him seriously. “Even though it was just a hashtag.”  
Cocking his head to the side, Even smiled at him. “Still clinging to that theory?”  
“Yeah,” Isak giggled, “cuz it’s true.” He sloppily tried to hitch his legs around Even’s waist but ended up stumbling backwards and dragging Even with him. “Carry me to bed,” he commanded.   
Rolling his eyes with a smile, Even lifted him up and carried him into their room. He put Isak down and then went back to get all their stuff.   
When he walked back in, Isak was staring at the bed with a shocked look on his face. “Even,” he whispered, “there’s an animal.” Even followed his gaze. Isak’s eyes were glued to Cardamom, who was curled up on their bed.   
“That’s our cat,” Even hummed, pulling Isak close from behind and leaning his head on his shoulder. Isak looked at him incredulously. “Our cat, Cardamom,” Even prompted. “I bought her for you?”  
Eyes growing wider, Isak swung around to face him. “You bought me a cat?” he squealed. Even laughed.   
“Yes, my love. Like four months ago.”  
Walking over to her tentatively, Isak petted her head. She purred immediately, making Isak beam and collapse in bed beside her. “Even, she’s so warmmm,” he said, voice breaking as he dragged her closer. Even sat beside them.  
They laid back and Isak put Cardamom on top of his chest, staring up at her almost cross-eyed.   
“Wanna fuck?” he asked suddenly, rolling his head to look at Even. The older boy let out a surprised laugh.   
“Nei,” he said, smiling and smoothing back Isak’s hair. His boy started to pout.   
“Why not?” he whined.   
Even pulled him close and nuzzled their noses together. “Because you are all drugged up.”  
“Am not,” Isak mumbled back, slapping his hand on Even’s neck and rubbing soft circles on it.   
“You had your wisdom teeth removed,” Even reminded again. Isak giggled.   
“Oh yeah,” he laughed, smiling. Even saw the gauze in his mouth and wrinkled his nose at the idea of hooking up right now. “Wanna jerk me off then?”  
Even laughed again, longer this time. “I… no, Issy.”  
Sticking out his bottom lip, Isak attempted to make puppy eyes at him. “Pleaseee,” he begged.  
“Eh… nei, my love. We can cuddle here, though.”  
“Okay,” Isak resolved, pushing his face up closer to Even’s. “We can do that.”  
Cardamom padded off of his chest and curled up between them.   
“I miss you,” Isak mumbled. Even laughed.   
“I’m right here.”  
“I know,” Isak smiled, touching his mouth. “I just missed your voice.”  
Even couldn’t help but think that Eskild had been right. This was almost too cute. Speaking of the older boy, Eskild decided to pop his head in right at that moment.   
“Halla, little pal,” he said, smiling at Isak. Isak dramatically threw his hands towards Isak.   
“Exxxxild!” he drawled. “Will you please get me fried rice, my boyfriend,” he glared at Even, “won’t do it.”  
Rolling his eyes, Eskild swung the door open and shut before walking in and sitting on the bed. “I don’t think fried rice is such a good idea.”  
Apparently Isak had forgot about it, because he started burrowing deeper into Even’s side. “I’m coldddd,” he whined. Even realized he had goose bumps. It was pretty chilly and he was only in a light pair of jeans and a tshirt.   
“I’m sorry, baby,” the older boy said, standing and grabbing his warmest sweatshirt. “Sit up,” he instructed. Isak pushed himself up but then started giggling and flopped all the way forward. Sighing with a smile, Even looked to Eskild. “Can you hold him up?”  
Eskild propped Isak up by the shoulders and Even easily pulled the sweatshirt over his soft blond head. “Pants!” Isak ordered, kicking his legs wildly. “It’s okay,” he assured Even, “Eskild can see me in my boxers. He’s seen soooo many naked guys, he won’t even care.”  
Eskild made an offended noise and Even laughed. “Alright, sweetheart, thank you for reminding me.”  
While Even was searching for a good pair of sweatpants, Eskild was still holding Isak up. The younger boy had smushed their faces close together and was staring at Eskild with the dumbest expression Even had ever seen on his face. And then his nose twitched. And then… then he sneezed.   
“Fuck!” Eskild shouted, dropping Isak’s shoulder and aggressively wiping at his own face. Isak fell forward, shaking with laughter. “It’s not funny,” Eskild told him, trying to hide his own smile. “I gotta go wash my face.”  
Even was also laughing. He laid Isak back and pulled off his jeans, chuckling to himself, and then tugged on the sweatpants. Isak was still trembling. Tears were running down his face. That made Even laugh harder.   
“It wasn’t that funny, silly,” Even fondly chastised, propping him back up. He gently tugged him into a hug and rubbed his back. Isak let out a couple last giggles and then pressed his nose into Even’s neck.   
“You smell good,” he said.   
“Thank you.”  
“You know, I would like it to be your cat.”  
Snorting, Even pulled back and pressed a kiss to Isak’s head. “What on earth do you mean?”  
“I mean…” he nearly crossed his eyes focusing on Even’s face. “I mean, I like when you pet me. I like it… when you pet me.”  
“Yeah?” asked Even, smiling as he brought up one hand and smoothed back Isak’s soft curls.   
“Yes,” Isak replied, nuzzling into the touch. “I would love if I was your cat.”  
“I think I like you as my boyfriend,” replied Even, softly kissing his forehead. Isak glowed.   
“I like that, too. But if I was your cat, that would also be nice. Maybe you can treat me like a cat sometimes. Pet me, rub my belly, feed me.”   
“I already do all those things,” Even laughed, leaning their heads together. He let out a squeak when Isak leaned forward and licked his nose. “What on earth?!” he laughed.   
“Your cattt,” Isak reminded as if it was the simplest thing in the world.   
“Kinky, little sex kitten,” Even mused. Isak lit up.   
“Yes! We should do that!”  
Rolling his eyes, Even ran one thumb over Isak’s cheek. “We should talk about it when you’re not all doped up.”  
“Right,” Isak affirmed, nodding seriously. His stomach let out a loud growl and he smiled bashfully and hung his head.   
“Are you hungry?” Even prompted. Isak licked his lips.   
“I was trying to be stealth,” he giggled, still not meeting Even’s eye. The older boy shook his head.   
“Why?”  
“Because you won’t let me eat lo mein!”  
“I thought you wanted fried rice.”  
“Oh yeah. Pleeeease, Even.” He lowered his head further until it was resting in Even’s lap and he was bent completely in half.   
“No, we can get some after you’re not all silly.”  
Isak blew a frustrated raspberry into Even’s thighs.   
“Do you want soup? Or applesauce?” the older boy gently prompted.   
“Yes!” Isak exclaimed, sitting back up immediately. “Yes, please! Now! Please!”  
Even smiled and went to stand but Isak pitifully held out his arms. “Do you want me to carry you?”  
“Yes!”   
Huffing, Even knelt down and Isak climbed onto his back, wrapping his arms around his neck. He tottered out under the weight of his boyfriend.   
“Oh my god,” Linn said with a fond roll of her eyes when they entered the kitchen.   
“Linn!” Isak said excitedly, wiggling. When Even didn’t let go, he pouted. “Put me downn!”  
Realising Isak, Even walked to the fridge. The younger boy bounced to Linn and gently picked up two handfuls of her hair. “Linn, I missed you at the dentist.”  
“That’s nice, Isak,” sighed Linn. She patted his back awkwardly when he collapsed into hug around her. Even chuckled.   
“He’s hopped up on laughing gas,” he explained.   
“I figured something of the sort,” replied Linn.   
“Linn, you should’ve come to the dentist. It was no fun.” Anticipating what was to come, Even turned to interject, but then Isak had already continued and there were tears in his eyes. “They stuck me with needles.”  
“Hey, hey, none of that,” Even said quickly, turning Isak toward him and wiping the tear that had streaked its way down his cheek. “Come here,” he continued when Isak sniffled, pulling the smaller boy into him and peppering his head with kisses. “You’re okay.”  
Isak sniffed again and wrapped his arms around Even’s waist. “You’re the greatest,” he mumbled. Linn slipped out of the kitchen.   
“Thank you, lovely. Now can you sit here while I finish your lunch, please?”  
Obedient, Isak trotted to the kitchen table and sat down. He watched with interest as Even made him soup. After a bit, however, he picked up his phone and started typing. Even ignored him until his hiccuping giggles grew louder.   
“What?” the older boy finally gave into his curiosity.   
“Check your phone,” Isak replied. Narrowing his eyes, Even reached into his pocket. 

Isak: hy gusy do you no what i send even   
Isak: picures of my   
Isak: penis

“Oh. Oh, baby,” Even sighed, biting down on his smile. His phone pinged again. 

Isak: and he sends thme back!

Even flushed and brought one hand to his forehead. It would have been bad enough if it was just the guys but this was the megasquad chat. 

Sana: You better be drunk or something.   
Even: Sorry guys, he had to get anesthetic for the dentist so he’s a little loopy. 

Receiving this message, Isak’s head snapped up. “Shhh,” he said angrily. “Don’t tell them!”  
“Why do you want them to know these things anyway?”  
“So they’ll be jealous,” Isak replied with a roll of his eyes. 

Jonas: bro *crying laughing face*  
Mahdi: this is gold   
Mahdi: would it be wrong to screenshot this  
Isak: he screnshots my puctures all the timne!

“Okay, that’s enough phone time for you,” Even laughed, grabbing Isak’s phone and shoving it into his front pocket. 

Magnus: way to get some Isak!  
Eva: hahahaha omg Even please let him continue  
Even: His phone has been confiscated. 

With that, Even closed his own phone and put it next to Isak’s. Although that problem had been dealt with, now he had a very pouty boyfriend.   
“Why’d you take my phone?” Isak questioned, standing and collapsing against Even’s back. The older boy stirred his soup and chuckled.   
“So you won’t hate me when you’re sobered up.”  
“I wouldn’t ever hate you,” Isak replied softly. Even smiled.   
“Your soup’s ready,” he informed Isak, who perked up and reached for the pot. Even grabbed his wrist.   
“How about we get a bowl?”  
Isak nodded. Even grabbed them two bowls and poured in some soup. They settled in on the couch.  
“Let me feed you,” Isak commanded, guiding his spoon to Even’s mouth. The older boy rolled his eyes and allowed himself to be fed a little bit of soup.   
“Now you eat,” he told Isak gently. The smaller boy frowned by obliged.   
They were sitting beside each other but apparently that wasn’t enough for Isak, who wiggled into Even’s lap, sloshing both their soups. “Careful, baby,” Even warned.   
“Oh, right,” Isak nodded, more gently adjusting himself.   
“You know, my lap isn’t the best place to eat soup,” the older boy laughed.   
Isak smiled and leaned back against his chest. “I just don’t want you ever to let go of me ever again.”  
And Even knew Isak’s doped up and when he says “never let go of him again” he meant literally, because of course Even hadn’t been physically holding him since the day they meant, but he still felt his stomach get tight because he had let go of Isak a couple of times, and a couple times more he’d tried. And Isak had been so broken by it.   
“I won’t,” Even sighed, pressing a warm kiss into Isak’s neck. The smaller boy hummed contentedly. 

“Okay, I’m ready for bed!” Isak announced an hour later. His eyes were drooping as he gave Even another dopey smile.   
“Are you?” laughed Even. “Good to know.”  
“Take me!” Isak whined.  
With a huff, Even stood them both up and lead them to the bedroom, arms wrapped around Isak’s waist. “There, lay down,” he softly instructed. The smaller boy curled up in the bed.   
“Lay with me,” he asked, reaching out his arms. Even smiled and did so. “Goodnight, boyfriend,” Isak said with a yawn before nuzzling into his side and falling asleep. Even grinned. 

“Ugh.”  
The groaning from the hallway was enough to clue everyone in that Isak had woken up. Eskild, Noora, Linn and Even were all sharing dinner at the table when he stumbled out, hair mussed and eyes squinty.   
“Hi, sleepy head,” Eskild said, waving to him. Isak glared.   
“What time is it?” he asked.   
“Almost eight.”  
Plopping down beside Even, Isak reached for a piece of bread. “Did I do anything stupid after the dentist? I don’t really remember much.”  
Everyone around him chuckled. “You said I’ve seen a million dicks and you sneezed in my face,” Eskild informed him. Isak flushed.   
“Fuck, sorry.”  
“You cried on me,” Linn added.   
Noora laughed. “All you said to me is that I’m pretty.”   
Looking to Even, Isak raised his eyebrows. “I can’t even imagine what I put you through,” he said.   
“Well, let’s see… you made me carry you everywhere, you forgot about Cardamom, you said you would like to be my cat, you spilled soup on me, you made me change you, you cried a lot, and… let’s just say you should check your phone,” Even replied with a raised-eyebrow grin. Isak frowned and grabbed his phone from his pocket.   
Judging by the redness that colored his face, he was more than a little embarrassed.


	43. Chapter forty-three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Isak and Even go to party before Even goes back to school, some people are there, things are said and Even is protective/jealous.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Halla babes!  
> So sorry for my long gap between updates, I know I usually update more quickly but I had a hectic few days and THEN THE TRAILER CAME OUT so my best friend and I spent the last two days/nights holed up at my place rewatching all the best episodes and all our favorite fan vids and we ate a lot of chocolate and I'm sick so I think I got her sick but anywayyy here we are. Finally posted this.

Chapter 43  
“So what do you want to do on our last day before school starts again?” asked Even, pulling Isak further onto his chest.  
“Um, your last day,” Isak reminded. “Mine’s not til next week.”  
“Okay, what do you want to do on my last day then?”  
“Lay here.”  
“That’s boring, Issy,” laughed Even. “Be a little more creative.” Isak shrugged. Even frowned. “You’re so helpful.”  
“Is it my fault that all I ever wanna do is lay here with you?”  
“Nei,” Even replied, fixing some of his hair. “Can’t blame you for that.”  
They spent another few minutes in silence before Even tightened his grip slightly and continued, “You know what I wanna do?”  
“What?”  
“Go out. Go to a party.”  
“Nobody’s having a party.”  
“How would you know?”  
“It’s Sunday.”  
“Would you just ask around, please?”  
Huffing, Isak pulled out his phone. “Anywhere to go tonight?” he typed, sending it to the boys. After a few moments, his phone pinged. 

Jonas: a third year from last year is having a party at his for the end of summer

Rolling his eyes, Isak showed the text to Even. Even beamed. “Could be get in?” he asked. Isak put it on the chat. 

Jonas: probably. It’s supposed to be huge.

“Sounds great,” Even cooed, nuzzling his face into Isak’s hair. The smaller boy wiggled away from this.  
“Stop, it’s too hotttt,” he whined. It was unusually hot for that time of year. Even scoffed.  
“You love it.”  
“Not in this weather.”  
“Then would you propose a shower?”  
Looking up with a grin, Isak nodded. “Sounds perfect.” 

That evening, they rolled up to the party when it was already going pretty hard. The minute Isak saw a million drunk kids whom he hadn’t talked to in months stumbling around, he rolled his eyes. He liked parties okay, but not the huge, overwhelming ones. But Even was glowing so bright that he swallowed his annoyance.  
“This is gonna be fun!” the older boy was saying now, drawing Isak slightly closer to him with one hand on his waist. Isak squirmed away but nodded, running one thumb over Even’s cheek.  
They slipped into the house and Isak had to squint to see through opposite way-too-bright lights and the darkness.  
“Is anyone here that you know?” Even shouted into his ear. Isak shook his head.  
“How about you?” he shouted back.  
“I think I see some people. Chill if I go say hi?”  
“Yeah! Jonas should be here soon!”  
“Okay!”  
Even ducked down and pressed a soft kiss to Isak’s cheek before slipping into the crowd. Alone, Isak headed to the kitchen. He got a drink while texting Jonas. 

Isak: dude where are you?  
Jonas: mom found some of my weed and put me on house arrest, sorry man:(  
Isak: ughhhh that sucks. Is she super pissed?  
Jonas: she’ll get over it  
Isak: ok. Do you know if Mahdi or mags or anyone is coming?  
Jonas: idk man  
Isak: ok. Have fun at home  
Jonas: thanks bro

Sighing, Isak slipped his phone back into his pocket and looked around to see if he recognized anyone.  
“Isn’t that Isak Valtersen?”  
Isak heard the whisper from behind him and tensed up but didn’t turned around.  
“Yeah.”  
“He’s gay, right?”  
“That’s what Emma said.”  
“But he doesn’t look gay.”  
That’s when Isak dared a glance over his shoulder. Two of last years first-year girls were staring at him. As soon as he caught their eyes, they blushed and looked down. Isak was glad when a big, beefy kid- a third year from last year?- came over and started chatting them up.  
Taking his phone back out, he tried to distract himself and willed Even to come back over. Suddenly he felt a presence loom over him and looked up.  
“Hi,” the beefy kid from before said, leering down at him. Isak felt his stomach clench.  
“Hi.”  
“Isak, right?”  
“Yep.”  
“These ladies said you led on their friend, only to come out as a fag. That true?”  
The kid had mean eyes. He seemed to enjoy making Isak squirm in order to impress the giggly girls behind him.  
Isak didn’t really know what to say. “I’m… I’m gay,” he finally settled. The kid snorted.  
“Got that much,” he replied. Isak looked behind him to see that some others- some kids from his own year- had gathered. The beefy kid leaned in close to his ear. “You’re dating the nutcase from Bakka, yeah?”  
Isak pushed at his chest, trying to separate them. The dude pressed his crotch into Isak’s leg. Isak was appalled to find him half hard.  
“Get away from me!” he said through his teeth.  
“Hey, friend, we’re just talking. Can’t two bros just… talk?”  
“Come on, Markus, leave him alone,” a girl said.  
“Why? We’re just chatting.”  
“Yeah, dude, don’t be a homophobic asshole,” another one of Isak’s classmates said. The two girls who’d initiated the whole things started to look more ashamed as others spoke up. Markus turned to the boy who’d spoken.  
“I’m not a homophobe,” he said with an incredulous shake of his head.  
“You called him a fag.”  
Markus rolled his eyes. Seeing his attention diverted, Isak tried to slip away, but Markus turned and grabbed his arm. “I was just defending these lovely ladies’ friend.”  
“Let go!” Isak said, pushing as him roughly.  
“Woah, watch the temper,” said Markus. He was only a little taller than Isak but we was super muscley and tough looking. “I’ll I’m asking is that you apologize to these girls for fucking with their friend.” He pressed himself harder against Isak. “And then you can apologize to me,” he said, grinding into Isak’s thigh. “You know, for being so rude.”  
“Dude!” Isak all but shouted, pushing with all high might. Markus stumbled back a few steps. Someone put one hand on his shoulder and shook his head.  
“Okay, kid, I won’t kick your ass for that one,” Markus spat, walking back to Isak. “But if you ever touch me again, I swear to god I’ll-”  
“You’ll what?” a voice boomed from the door. Isak looked and almost melted at the sight of Even. Markus was about Even’s height but somehow Even looked taller.  
“Oh, is this the boyfriend?” asked Markus, directing the question to Isak. “Coming to save you?”  
“I suggest you move away from Isak, now,” Even said calmly, walking over and putting one soothing hand on Isak’s arm. He smiled at his boy before turning back to Markus, who hadn’t moved. “Didn’t you hear me? I said walk away. Or I’ll fucking kill you!” He added the last part with a bright, crinkly-eyed smile and a small shrug.  
“Come on, bro, you’re just being a drunk jackass,” one of Markus’s friends said, pulling him away. Markus rolled his eyes but followed them. The first year girls disappeared and, slowly, everyone went back to what they’d been doing. Even watched everyone leave before turning to Isak. His eyes were lead.  
“Who the fuck was that?” he whispered, ice leaking into his voice. Isak was trembling.  
“I don’t even know, some- some idiot from your class.”  
“I’ve never seen him,” Even spat back, staring the way Markus had gone. He suddenly started and turned back to Isak. “Oh my god, are you okay, baby?”  
“I’m fine,” Isak replied, nodding a couple of times as if to assure himself of this fact.  
“Did he hit you? What was his problem, anyway?”  
Blushing, Isak looked down and shrugged. “Those girls were Emma’s friends. He was trying to impress them by, like, avenging her or whatever.”  
“What the fuck?!” Even looked Isak up and down. “He didn’t hit you?”  
“Nei,” Isak sighed.  
“Fuck, I’m so so sorry, baby,” Even rambled, pulling Isak tight to him and running one hand over the back of his head. Isak let out a breath into Even’s neck.  
“It wasn’t your fault.”  
“I was the one who wanted to go to this dumb party.”  
“Even, you couldn’t have known what was gonna happen. Also, it wasn’t that big of a deal.”  
Seeming not to hear him, Even pulled away and scanned Isak’s body again. “Tell me exactly what he did.”  
“It was nothing,” Isak protested, a blush creeping over his face.  
“Nothing? Fuck that guy, Isak, fuck him. What did he say to you?” Even brushed back Isak’s curls frantically, like he was trying to prove to himself that Isak was there, not going anywhere.  
“He just- he just said I should apologize to those girls and then to him for- being so rude.”  
“What did he mean, apologize to him? He was the one being an asshole!”  
Feeling his heart dip low, Isak shrugged. “He, um… he was, like… pressed against me. And kind of… hard. So I think he meant apologize… by…”  
“What the fuck?!” Even exclaimed. “That fucking prick, who does he think he is?”  
Isak flushed harder and blinked a few times. “I don’t really know,” he shrugged. At this, Even softened and ran one hand through his hair again before pulling them flush against each other.  
“Are you okay, lovely?” he murmured. Isak nodded.  
“It wasn’t a big deal, like I said.”  
Looking into Isak’s eyes, Even shook his head. “Yes, it was,” he said softly.  
Isak sniffled and shrugged. Even kissed his forehead. “Do you wanna get out of here?” he asked.  
“I don’t care. It’s your last day before school and you wanted to be here.”  
“That was before my boyfriend got fucking assaulted.”  
“I wasn’t- come on, Even. It wasn’t like that.”  
“Harassed?”  
Isak sighed. “Better than assaulted” There was a quiet few moments before Isak shyly continued, “Would you actually have beat him up?”  
“Fuck yeah, baby. He fucking- the sight of his hands on you- oh my god, it made me so mad.”  
Isak let a small smile brush his face. “Yeah?”  
“Yeah.” Even pulled them impossibly tighter together and Isak felt like he was drowning in Even’s warmth. Even enveloped him like the sun and he never got used to it, not after spending so long alone in the cold. “Let’s go home, Isak.”  
And Isak melted even a little more. “Okay.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soooooo I need help figuring out what to do once s4 comes out and some parts of this fic may no longer be canon-compliant. Any suggestions? Should I conclude it now?


	44. Chapter forty-four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Even's first day of college! Isak is basically his mom, he makes a new friend or two. Kollectivet is life!  
> Damn lol I'm so good at summaries.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Helloooooooo allllllll  
> I honestly don't think I've been so happy over something that only lasted seven minutes in my life. My friends and I watched it after lunch in the soccer field and I'm crYING and SHOOK.  
> Our baby boys are actuallllyyy moving in together lol fuck me, this is more than I even could've asked for.  
> Also our QUEENS ARE BACK and girl squad is my actual life goals. I'm just all around in an A+ mood because it's also 65 degrees outside and my cold is subsiding and you all were so sweet last chapter and so basically I've reached a new level of relaxed and pure. ALSO I love this chap, it was super fun to write. Even though I probably should've been doing homework, like lol who fucking cares, I just got an A on my history test so I (very logically) have decided to reward myself by not doing homework during this study hall.

Chapter 44  
“Okay. You’re ready?”  
“I’m ready.”  
“You have everything you need?”  
“Yep.”  
“Did you grab a snack?”  
At this, Even let out a fond laugh. “This isn’t kindergarten, Isak.”  
Isak pouted. “I’m sorry for caring. I guess you’ll just starve.”  
Rolling his eyes, Even ducked down and pressed and gentle kiss to Isak’s cheek. “You’re such a softie.” Isak scoffed but wrapped his arms gently around Even’s waist. The older boy hummed. “Do you really think I should get a snack?”  
Smiling, Isak reached into his back pocket and pulled out a granola bar, slipping it into Even’s bag. “Yes. I do.”  
“I’ll miss you.” Even said it almost sadly. Isak wanted to roll his eyes but instead he leaned his head against Even’s chest.  
“It’s only a few hours.”  
“I know, but…”  
Isak understood. Even had his first college classes today. And, honestly, this was going to be the first time they’d been completely apart with no super available texting for more than an hour or two in a while. But more than that, everything was going to be different after today. Change excited Even but he knew it scared Isak. And honestly, change that had any potential to mess things up between the two of them? That scared Even, too.  
“We’re gonna be okay,” Isak sighed. “You literally live here. I don’t think this is gonna be that hard.”  
Nodding, Even rested his forehead against Isak’s. “I know. I just worry. We’ll be leading different lives for the first time. You’ll make new friends, I’ll make new friends. We’ll get invited to parties without each other. And maybe I won’t be able to handle it, maybe I’ll have an episode and screw up everything at school and you’ll get tired of being with a failure and-”  
Isak pressed their mouths together. “Don’t you ever call yourself a failure again,” he said seriously after pulling away, staring Even dead in the eye. “You are the farthest thing from a failure.”  
Even was quiet. Isak brushed away some of his hair. “Hey you. It’s gonna be okay. Yeah, we’ll make new friends- or you will, I’m antisocial as fuck- but that’s fine. Good, even. Even married couples have different friends from work and stuff. And I know we’re basically married,” here he rolled his eyes, “but we’re still young. We should have experiences without each other so we’re not completely dependent.” Isak stressed the word completely because, who were they kidding? They were already pretty dependent. But neither of them saw much of a problem with that, to be honest. “And let’s be real, we’re so gonna bring each other to our parties. But even if we both make completely new friends that the other can’t stand, and even if we get invited to parties where you’re strictly not allowed to bring your boyfriend, and even if you have an episode, I promise I won’t let anything break us. Last time something threatened to I literally threw up, didn’t I?” Isak let out a soft chuckle but then grew serious again. “I’m being for real, though. I will never let anything come between us. Unless you truly don’t love me anymore, we’ll make it work.”  
“I could never not love you,” Even protested with a vehement shake of his head. Isak smiled warmly.  
“Then it looks like we won’t have a problem.”  
Even wrapped Isak in his arms. “I love you. Did you know that?”  
Isak giggled. “Now that you mention it, I think I did. You’re gonna be late.”  
“I’m going, I’m going,” Even laughed, backing away and heading to the door. As he went to walk out, Isak called his name. Even turned around.  
“I love you, too.”

It wasn’t as strange as he’d anticipated. In fact, it felt a lot like his first day at Nissen, last year. Unfamiliar faces, tightness in his chest, and an overwhelming urge to make this new world his own.  
One thing wasn’t like last year, though. He missed Isak. A lot. More than was probably healthy.  
“Hi!” rang a bubbly voice from beside him. Even turned to see a short girl with a long, dark braid running down her back sit next to him. She smiled.  
“I’m May.” She smiled and her brown eyes shone.  
“Even.”  
“Is this your first class?”  
“Yeah. Is it obvious?”  
May laughed and shook her head. “Nah, it’s mine, too. I was just wondering. So… what high school did you go to?”  
Even swallowed. “Bakka and then Nissen.”  
“Oh! My cousin goes to Nissen. Chris Berg?”  
Blinking a few times, Even stared at her. “Serr?” he managed after a moment.  
May smiled confusedly. “Um, yeah. Did you know each other?”  
Letting out a breathy laugh, Even nodded. “Um, ja! Chris and her friends are tight with my- um…” Even wondered momentarily if he should mention Isak so soon, because what if she got grossed out or weirded out? He’d have to see her everyday. But, deciding this was stupid, he continued, “my boyfriend, Isak, and his friends. Well, we’re all friends. Have you met Noora?”  
May was beaming, nodding enthusiastically. “I mean, I haven’t met her but I follow her on instagram and I’ve seen her in about a million pictures.”  
“Me and Isak literally live with her.”  
Laughing, May shook her head. “That is so weird. Like what are the chances?”  
“Right?! This is crazy!”  
May was staring at him with narrow eyes. “Isak,” she repeated. “Isn’t that the little blond one? Chris used to have the biggest crush on him!”  
Even tilted his head back and laughed. “I know,” he replied.  
Pursing her lips, May raised her eyebrows playfully. “I guess we can’t be friends, since you stole my cousin’s man.”  
Even shook his head, biting down on his smile. “Guess not. Although she has moved on.”  
“Ugh, don’t even mention Kasper,” May groaned. “If I have to hear one more thing about that boy, I will cut my ears off. You know he comes to all out family events? Even if me, my parents, Chris and her parents are just going out for dinner, he comes along! I think my parents and Chris’s parents like him more than they like me and Chris combined.”  
Even chuckled and shrugged. “He’s a cool guy,” he commented. “Quite interesting. Very polite. I’d love him if I was a parent.”  
“Yeah,” May reluctantly admitted. “And it’s kinda cute that he comes around so often, you know? He lives with his big brother because he parents died when he was little, so it’s nice that Chris’s parents care about him so much.”  
Even blinked. He hadn’t known that. “Oh,” he managed. “Geez, that really sucks.”  
“Yeah. But it was a long time ago. And Chris loves him a lot, so I think he’s pretty happy. I mean, I hope.”  
“Yeah, they’re certainly serious about each other,” Even agreed. Chris and Kasper had a very simple, quiet sort of relationship that just kind of worked. Of all the couples in the squad, they seemed to have the least problems. They just fit.  
“Speaking of serious, you and your boyfriend are pretty serious, right? I mean, if you’re living together.”  
“Yeah,” Even nodded. “We’re- he’s- he’s everything.”  
May squeaked and put her hands over her mouth. “God, I love romance,” she sighed.  
“What about you?” prompted Even. “Anybody special?”  
Wrinkling her nose, May shook her head. “I have sort of a thing with my best guy friend… we always say it’s not a good idea because we’ll ruin the friendship, but then we end up making out at a party or whatever… but I’m not really dating anyone.”  
Even nodded. “Sounds complicated.”  
“It is,” May agreed. “But who knows? Maybe I’ll meet a charming film student and get swept away.”  
“I’m rooting for you,” Even said with a little fist pump. May giggled. Just then, the professor walked in and quieted everyone down. As Even took out his notebook, he couldn’t help but smile.  
That had gone well.

It had been two hours and twenty-three minutes since Even left. He’d sent Isak a quick text between his first and second classes- he’d met Chris’s cousin??- but other than that there had been radio silence.  
“Are you still moping?” Eskild asked, sticking his head in the door. Isak glared at him from the bed, where he’d been sullenly staring at the ceiling.  
“I’m not moping.”  
“Okay, you’re just laying here for fun, then?”  
“Fuck off,” Isak said moodily, curling into Even’s pillow. Contrary to what he’d been told, Eskild walked in and sat beside Isak.  
“C’mon, little buddy. There was a time when you lived here without Even, you know. What did you do back then?”  
“This,” Isak replied. “Lay in bed, go on my phone, and pray for a miracle.”  
“And then your miracle came, how cute is that?” sighed Eskild. Isak rolled eyes.  
“Yes, but then he went away to college.”  
“Honestly, Isak. What would you have done if Even had wanted to go to the States or something?”  
“Dropped out of school, packed my bags, moved to America and gotten a job for Trump,” Isak replied dryly.  
“Bad idea,” someone commented from the hall. Noora, who’d been walking by, popped in. “And not just the Trump part. Following your boyfriend into a different country is incredibly lonely.”  
“Well it’s a good thing Even stayed here, then, isn’t it?” Isak huffed. He groaned as Noora sat on the bed, too, slotting herself in between Isak and Eskild.  
“Yes, it is. I couldn’t stand if you were this moody all the time.”  
“I’m not moody, I’m just…” Isak struggled to find the words. “I just miss him, okay?”  
He groaned again as Noora and Eskild simultaneously cooed.  
“Hey, Isak… why is everyone in here?” Linn asked from the door, holding Cardamom.  
“We’re comforting Isak because he misses Even,” Eskild explained casually.  
“Actually they’re just invading,” Isak corrected. Linn smiled softly and walked in, laying down at the foot of the bed. All the space in the bed was now occupied, especially when Cardamom crawled over to Isak- because of course she loved him best, he’d cried a lot of tears into her fur and spent so many hours cuddling and coddling and spoiling her that it was basically inevitable- and wedged herself against his chest and started purring.  
“Hello, my sweet baby angel,” Isak murmured, stroking her absentmindedly. “You’re the only welcome guest here.”  
“Fine, Isak,” Eskild sighed, pretending to get up, but Isak grabbed his wrist and tugged him back down. Eskild grinned. “You love us.”  
“Whatever,” mumbled Isak.  
“It’s okay, Isak, we miss Even, too,” said Linn.  
It was silly, really. They were five misfit kids who, for one reason or another, had nowhere else to go. They were all so incrediably different- it was actually hard to believe at times- and yet they somehow ended up being a family. And it was especially silly that the apartment felt so empty without Even- it was a three person place housing five, afterall. But, nevertheless, Even had swooped in and drawn them all closer together. At first it was because they were all watching out for him, but then it was his kind soul and bright laugh that made them all a little happier. Linn’s step got a little lighter, Noora’s shoulders got a little less tense, Eskild’s heart swelled a little bit bigger and Isak, well… there wasn’t much use in describing the change that came over Isak.  
“He’ll be home in an hour, though,” Eskild said. “We should make him dinner!”  
Noora sighed. “Does that mean I should make him dinner?”  
“Nei,” Eskild drawled, rolling his eyes. “We’ll all help. What would he want, Isak?”  
Isak shrugged. “You know as well as I do.”  
“Hmmm. Well, we’ll figure something out. Come on. We’ll make his first night after college special.”  
He hopped up and held his hand out to Noora, who sighed again and then allowed herself to be dragged out of bed, squealing with Eskild tossed her over his shoulder. Linn stood and then the two of them- Noora’s head was behind Eskild’s back- stared at Isak. The blond boy huffed and got up. 

Even was walking out of his third and last class of the day, talking to a boy named Liam.  
“So what dorm are you in?” he asked now.  
“I live in a shared flat,” Even replied.  
“Oh, that’s sick!” Liam exclaimed enthusiastically. “You guys must throw awesome parties.”  
“I guess we do,” Even laughed.  
“Who do you live with?”  
“Some friends, and my partner.”  
“Cool. What’s her name?”  
“His name is Isak,” Even gently corrected. Liam blinked.  
“Oh, uh, sorry. That’s cool, though. That you guys live together.”  
“Yeah,” Even agreed, nodding.  
“So I’ll see you around, then?” asked Liam as they got to where they were separating.  
“Sounds great!” Even enthusiastically replied, giving the boy a wide smile. Liam smiled back, giving him two thumbs up.  
On the bus back to the kollektivet, Even was a little… nervous. Obviously he hadn’t changed in the span of three hours, but still. He couldn’t help but tap anxiously on the poll he was holding, wondering if things were going to be different.  
Isak had told him otherwise this morning, but Even was terrified that such a big step in his life was going to trigger and episode and that maybe Isak would get tired of him and leave. He knew Isak was the most pure, caring boy he’d ever known, but sometimes Even wondered if he was just unlovable.  
Don’t think like that, he told himself. Imagine how upset you’d be if Isak thought that about himself.  
The bus got to his stop after what felt like forever and Even got off, walking the short ways back to the apartment. He finally got there and unlocked the door tentatively. Sounds of laughter and the clatter of pans filled his ears immediately.  
Cardamom hopped off of the couch and walked to him, rubbing against his shins. She was the only one who’d noticed he was home. After petting her some, Even walked to the kitchen and leaned against the door. Noora was laughing so hard she was bent in two and Linn was almost equally amused. Isak’s back was to Even but he could see the smaller boy shaking. Eskild’s shirt was soaked with what looked like oil.  
Even cleared his throat. Isak spun around and his face went from giddy and amused to absolutely drunk in love, so gooey that Even couldn’t help but match it.  
“Halla,” Isak whispered, walking over and lacing his arms around Even’s neck. Even put his arms around Isak’s waist and pulled him closer, pressing their foreheads together.  
“Halla,” he whispered back. Isak was staring at him with so much tender love and care that he thought he might cry.  
“I missed you.”  
“I missed you, too. Like crazy.”  
Isak sighed contentedly. “How are we gonna do this everyday?” he asked, half-joking.  
“I think this part right here is worth it,” Even replied. He pressed a kiss to Isak’s forehead and then to his mouth.  
“Yeah,” Isak agreed. “I think you might be right.”  
“Okay, lovebirds,” Eskild butted in. “Go wait in the living room, dinner will be ready in a minute and we can watch a movie.”  
“Dinner?” Even asked with interest, peeking over Isak’s head. Eskild nodded.  
“We made stir fry with all your favorite stuff. And there are brownies in the oven.”  
Touched, Even smiled at his roomies. “You did all this for me?”  
Noora giggled and nodded. Linn rolled her eyes. “Of course we did, silly.”  
Swallowing the overwhelming urge to tell each and everyone of these beautiful people just how much they meant to him, Even grinned. “Takk,” he said. “Really. For everything.”  
“Well, we do love you, you know,” said Eskild. Even chuckled.  
“And I love all of you, too.”

In the living room, Even layed with his head in Isak’s lap. “In his powerpoint, though, he had a picture of Popeye sitting with Betty Boop,” he was saying about his history of comics and cartoons class. “I felt bad on Olive Oyl’s behalf.”  
Isak was staring down at him stupidly. “Mmhmm,” he hummed, playing with Even’s hair.  
“And then he was discussing the development of Mickey Mouse, how he went from his old-fashioned version to the CGI we see today, and he had a picture of Donald and Minnie. I was honestly so distracted by his lack of proper couple pairing.”  
Isak laughed. “Sounds like a rough day,” he said.  
“It was,” agreed Even dramatically, taking Isak’s hand and squeezing it.  
Isak giggled and leaned down to press three quick kisses to Even’s mouth.  
“Okay! Dinner is served!” Eskild announced from the kitchen, walking in with the food. Noora and Linn followed, rolling their eyes collectively. Even sat up and took a plate.  
Everyone curled into the couches and pressed play on the movie Isak had queued up.  
“Hey, baby?” whispered Isak.  
“Yeah?” Even whispered back, absentmindedly toying with Isak’s hair.  
“Welcome home.”


	45. Chapter forty-five

Chapter 45  
“Hei,” Eskild said, knocking at the doorframe nervously. Isak tore his eyes away from Even, who’d been scrolling through his phone, oblivious to how BEAUTIFUL he looked.   
“Halla,” the youngest boy replied, popping up a little. He knitted his eyebrows when Eskild, quite obviously torn about something, stared at the ground. “Is something up?”  
“Um… why don’t we have a family meeting?”  
Isak blinked and glanced back up at Even, who looked just as confused as he felt. “Okay.”  
The three boys walked out to the kitchen, where Noora and Linn were sitting at the table, looking worried.  
The five of them all sat around together. There was a tense silence.   
“Is something going on?” Isak finally blurted out. Eskild took a deep breath and tisked his tongue slightly, a nervous habit.   
“There’s something… we need to talk about.” When nobody replied, Eskild sighed. “The landlord wants two people out.”  
“What?” Noora exclaimed off the bat, eyebrows shooting up. Linn narrowed her eyes and Isak balked his head back. Even didn’t react.   
“He, um… he never really knew about Even or that Noora was back. But apparently somebody complained, and… he says he can’t allow five people to live in a three person flat.”   
“Why? We’re not hurting anybody. Shouldn’t he be happy to get rent anyway he can?” protested Isak.   
“I know, but… there was really no getting through to him. I really tried.” Eskild’s voice cracked.   
“This isn’t your fault,” Noora said with a shake of her head.   
“I just… this is all of our home. I don’t want to have to do this. It’s like kicking out my family.”  
Everyone was quiet. Finally, Even spoke. “I can move back to my parents.”  
“Nei!” Isak snapped, turning to stare at him. “Nei, you can’t leave.” He put one hand on Even’s forearm and held tight. Even turned to him and smiled softly.   
“We’ll do what we have to do,” he said soothingly.   
“If Even moves out, I can probably find a place to stay,” Linn said softly. Eskild shook his head and Isak’s heart broke a little. Eskild and Linn had been living together for longer than any of them.  
“No, you have to stay,” the youngest boy said. “I… I’ll go.”   
“Where?” Eskild asked, voice soft. “Isak… there’s a reason you’re here.”   
“I can find another place.”  
Isak felt Even’s hand snake into his in. He turned his head and looked at the older boy, who smiled softly at him. “Maybe we could find a place.”  
Isak stared up at him. There was quiet until Eskild spoke again. “If… if you guys wanna do that, my friend is moving out of a flat only a few streets away. He’s looking for someone. It’s one bedroom, but I don’t think you two will mind?”  
Even nodded slightly, eyes still on Isak. “We’ll discuss it.”  
“Okay… do you want some space?”  
Even nodded again, more definitely this time, before getting up and walking towards their room. Isak sat silently for a moment before stumbling up and following him. 

Walking in behind Even, Isak stared at his boyfriend's back. It seemed stupid, really. Why did the idea of moving in with Even alone make him so anxious? They’d been living together for months, damn it.   
Maybe, with Eskild’s constant nagging and Noora barging in to clean and Linn stealing Cardamom, there wasn’t much time when they were completely, 100% alone. They were two of five roommates who just happened to be dating.   
But to live alone with your boyfriend… that felt so real. They would be together. Everyday. All day. And they wouldn’t have interruptions. Which was nice… it was nice, but it was scary.   
“Do you want to?”  
Even turned to face him after asking the question, smiling hugely. Isak stared back at him.   
It was scary. It scared him, to live in a home with another person who was “the most important person.” When he lived alone with his mother, they spent so much time together. Isak sometimes felt like he couldn’t breathe. And then he had to watch her deteriorate before his eyes. He had to watch her fall into nothing. She disintegrated. And there was nothing he could do to stop it.   
What if Even had an episode and Isak couldn’t help him? What if Even was depressed and Isak took a shower or went for groceries and, when he came back, he found his boy with slits in his wrists or too many pills in his stomach? He could never, ever forget the fear of “Somewhere in another universe, we are together for all eternity. Remember that. Love you. Even,” out of his heart. That fear had poisoned him and even though he trusted Even and believed in him and trusted that he would tell Isak if he ever felt he was getting that bad, there was still something in him that was gut-wrenchingly terrified that, one day, he wouldn’t be enough to keep Even here.   
But… but, then again, they would live alone together. They would get to have their own life, and a much more real one than the one they shared now. They’d have to do all their chores together and they could sleep as late or get up as early as they wanted. They would have sex anywhere and cuddle anywhere and they could get another pet- Isak didn’t want a puppy, puppies were way too excited for him, he never dreamed about Even’s happy smile as he played with a puppy or dreamed about cuddling a happy little puppy himself and he never, ever imagined coming home to Even and Cardamom and a puppy, whom he most definitely didn’t call Baz in his head- but, in theory, they could get more pets. And Isak could come home to Even, with or without the puppy, and he could come home to, well, home. The kollektivet was home, but home with just Even would be different.   
And so he smiled. And took Even’s hands.   
“Yes.”

Turns out the flat that Eskild had mentioned really was perfect. It was small and cozy and the rent wasn’t too too high. And it was right by school for both of them.   
And, so, they started to pack their things.   
Goodbyes were harder that Isak had anticipated. With Noora, she smiled and blinked too quick and hugged him for not long enough. “I’ll miss you,” she said, and her voice had a broken little warble and, when she sighed, it was shaky. Isak wanted to tell her that she had helped him in almost every way a person can help somebody. And that even though he was a dick to her a lot of the time, she was kind to him. But he only hugged her again and said, “I’ll miss you, too.”   
With Linn, there were more words. “I’m gonna miss her more than you,” she said dejectedly, stroking Cardamom’s head. Isak sat beside her.   
“She’ll miss you, too,” he said. Linn chuckled through her nose.   
“Do you remember when we finally met?” she asked, raising her eyes to look at him. Isak nodded. “I was so annoyed with Eskild. I thought he’d been hiding a hookup who didn’t have a place to stay or something, and then it was just this fluffy fifteen year old who couldn’t go home.”  
“Fluffy?!” Isak protested. “And I was sixteen!”  
Linn rolled her eyes. After a moment, she smiled again. “I got it, though. I got why he was helping you.”   
“What do you mean?”   
Linn was quiet for a beat. “You looked so tired. You walked into the apartment and Eskild was screaming all happily, introducing us, and you had your hood up and your hat on and and you looked up at me- you were a lot shorter back then- and the bags under your eyes were so dark. You barely said anything, you just kept glancing around as Eskild went on and on about his ‘new baby son,’ and I wanted to help you, too. You looked like you were ready to give up.”  
Isak didn’t say anything. After a while, he shrugged. “I was.”  
“Well, you’re not anymore. You’re so different.”  
“Yeah,” Isak agreed.   
“You’re come visit. Eskild will kill you if you don’t.”  
“I know,” Isak laughed.   
“And I’d kill you.”  
This time, it was more serious. “I know.”

Isak never in a million years could have predicted how hard it would have been to say goodbye to Eskild. And it wasn’t even really goodbye. Just “I won’t be living with you anymore, but see you around!”  
They put it off until the day of the move. The boys were due to come help carry boxes in an hour. Even was out getting some last-minute stuff, Noora was with the girls, and Linn was asleep. Eskild and Isak were alone in the kitchen and Eskild was making small talk but he hadn’t looked Isak in the eye all day.   
“So…” the younger boy trailed during a lull in the conversation.   
“Isak, we don’t have to do this,” Eskild cut in, turning to him with a smile. “We don’t need to do the whole ‘goodbye, I love you, blah blah blah,’ thing. You’re coming over at least once a week, anyway. We can do that when I’m old and on my deathbed.”  
Isak stared at him. He willed himself to laugh, but, before he really knew what was happening, the laughter got twisted around and he was sobbing.   
“Oh, baby. Come on. You’re okay,” Eskild soothed, coming over and pulling Isak into a tight hug.   
Isak tried desperately to catch his breath but he was crying so hard. He didn’t understand. He’d never sober cried in front of Eskild before. But now he couldn’t stop. He curled his fists and gently hit them against Eskild’s chest.   
“What’s wrong?” Eskild breathed into his hair.   
Isak shook. “I don’t want to leave you,” he said, surprised at his own honestly. “I- I thought I wouldn’t cry but I just don’t wanna leave you.”  
Eskild sighed and smoothed back Isak’s hair. “I don’t want you to go, either, little pal. But it’s gonna be okay.”  
“I know,” Isak assured him. “And I’m not sad- about- anything else, but I just- you’re my family. You’re all I had for a while.”   
“Don’t make this sad, Isak,” Eskild sniffed, still hugging the smaller boy.   
“I’m sorry,” Isak cried. “I just- I thought it would be easier. I thought I would be used to leaving people by now.”  
“You’re leaving anyone. You’re just gonna go live with your super hot boyfriend. And come here for dinner every other night.”  
Isak laugh-sobbed. “I’m sorry for getting your shirt all wet,” he said. And then his voice cracked as he continued, “And I’m sorry for being a burden. And for hurting you. And for never telling you how much I need you.”  
“Why do you always have to be sorry?” asked Eskild, pulling away and swiping some of the hair off of Isak’s sticky face. “If I tell you that you have nothing to be sorry about, and that you’ve never been a burden to me, and that I need you and love you, too, can you not be difficult for a moment and just accept it?”  
Swallowing, Isak nodded. Eskild gave a soft, teary smile. “Good. Because that’s all true.”  
Breathing deeply, Isak leaned his head back against Eskild’s face. “Thank you,” he sighed. “You saved my life.”  
“And you made me a better person. So thank you, too.”

And that was it. They shared a few last hugs, and Isak said his final goodbyes to Noora and Linn, and then the boys were there and they were moving and Isak forgot how he could have been sad a few hours ago because he was moving in with the man of his dreams.   
“I bought sparkling wine,” Even mumbled when the other boys were inside getting anything they’d left behind.   
“Sparkling?” Isak mocked, voice light and happy. Even nodded.   
“Isn’t that what you celebrate with?”   
“I want beer,” the smaller boy whined, and Even’s smile grew impossibly wider and he tilted his chin up so Isak gave him three firm kisses because he loved that boy so much he couldn’t stop after one.   
But then Even was looking behind him and smiling, saying, “Oh, now you’re here.” Isak turned to see Sana. He settled into Even’s lap and smiled at his biology buddy.   
“Am I late?” she asked, and he told her that they were done. The conversation continued but he was high above it, veins buzzing with excitement as he listened to the boys emerge and then they were going and it was real. 

They spent the whole day unpacking and even though Isak made a fuss about being too lazy for this, he was secretly just as excited and eager as Even. By evening they’d finished putting away almost everything. The furniture was mostly made, too. They’d put the bed together first.   
Cardamom jumped up onto the mattress and curled in between them. Even smoothed back one of Isak’s eyebrows.   
“Do you know how much I love you?” he whispered in the soft blue light. Isak smiled and shook his head no. He pressed his face slightly further into the pillow.   
Even took one of Isak’s hands and held it between them. He gently traced over the lines of it with his index finger. “Here in your hand are all the universes,” he breathed. “Every one of them. Here’s ours.” He pinpointed a freckle. “And in ours, there is this whole big earth that’s part of this whole big solar system that just one of many. There’s so much matter and empty space, you can’t even imagine it. But, here,” he gestured to Isak’s whole hand, “there’s all of that times infinity. It just goes on and on forever. So big you can’t even describe the end.”  
He put Isak’s hand down and leaned in close to him, brushing their noses together. Isak smiled so lightly that Even’s heart wanted to burst. “It doesn’t even compare,” he breathed. “Not even the weight of all the universe ever to exist compares to how much I love you.”  
Isak felt a warmth spread through every bit of his body. He pulled himself closer to Even and rested their foreheads together. “The love that Baz Luhrmann infuses into his movies doesn’t even compare to the love I feel for you,” he mumbled back. Even smiled and chuckled.   
“Are you sure we wanna say that? That’s a pretty big commitment.”  
“I’m sure.”  
A pleasant quiet settled between them. Isak started to drift when he remembered something.   
“Hey, Even?”  
“Yeah?”  
“Would you wanna get a puppy?”  
He could feel Even smile. “I thought you’d never ask.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay! So! I've made a decision on what to do with this story. It is going to be roughly canon-compliant to s4, because I know a lot of stuff is going to happen that I'll want to write about!! I'm so excited for this season I can't even breathe!  
> But there will be a few key differences, such as:  
> The s4 events line up with the first term of the 99 squad's third year, instead of the second term of their second year. So the return from Easter break for them in the show will be like the first day of school for them here.   
> Evilde is a thing in this story. Still hoping for that to become canon anyway:)  
> Noorhelm is still a thing but there is a very high chance they won't be if necessary.  
> Isak and Even have a cat and will be adopting a dog. They also wear promise rings and have been dating for nearly a year. Any other little details that I've made up with writing this will also stay the same.   
> Chris and Kasper are still dating but again will break up if necessary.   
> That it I think?   
> I hope you all still continue to read and enjoy this story as much as I enjoy writing it!!


	46. Chapter forty-six

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Isak, Noora and Even get lunch. Isak sees Chris B's picture.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Halla, I was watching the babadook for the millionth time in a different tab while writing this, so sorry if there are more mistakes than usual! Just point them out to me. Also, I'm working on a story (non-fanfiction) about a girl named Gwen who takes a gap year in Wales to live with her sister and makes friends with another girl names Anna, and a lot goes down from there. I was wondering if anyone would be interested in checking it out? If so, just tell me in the comments or at http://ebox-gimme-the-beat.tumblr.com/   
> Love you all!!!

Chapter 46  
Noora: Hi Isak!  
Noora: What are you guys up to?

Isak looked down at his phone. He raised his eyebrows. 

Isak: nothing much. We’ve just been hanging around.  
Noora: Cool! Would it be okay if we hung out for lunch?  
Isak: ummm sure. What do you wanna do?  
Noora: I don’t care. Could I come over first, though? I haven’t seen your place.  
Isak: yeah. Even’s out but he should be back soon  
Noora: Okay:) see you soon!  
Isak: see you

Isak dropped his phone and looked around. Of course there was already laundry sitting around, dirty and clean, and the dishes hadn’t been done for a day or two. The blond boy started to tidy up, self-conscience about Noora coming. He at least wanted to make it seem like they could run a sanitary house to the cleanest girl he knew.   
By the time he’d finished, there was a knock at the door. “Hei!” he said, opening it to a smiling Noora.   
“Hei!” she said back. Isak grinned at her. She was wearing red lipstick and a blue sweater, and something about that made him feel safe.   
“Here, come in,” he moved aside and lead her to the kitchen, where there was a kettle on the stove. “Do you want tea?”  
“You know the answer?” Noora laughed, wrinkling her nose with a smile. Isak nodded and sat down across from her as he waited for the kettle to whistle. “So how are you?” he asked.   
“Um, good,” Noora nodded. “The girls and I are going out to some party with Sana’s brother tonight.”  
“Sana’s brother? Do you guys hang?”  
“Not really… apparently they all met when I had to leave early or something… but yeah.”  
“That’s cool. Are you excited?”  
“I guess. Um, William’s back in London, so I’m kind of excited for something to do.”  
“Oh. Why- what’s up with that?”  
“He- his dad needs him and- yeah.” Noora stared down at the table. Isak knew William wouldn’t have gone back if things between them had been perfect. He wondered if they were having problems again.   
“That sucks.   
“Yeah.”  
“When’s he coming back?”  
“He doesn’t know.”  
Isak nodded. “Well, I’m sure the party will be fun.”  
“Yeah. I mean, I hope. The girls haven’t been doing much fun stuff recently… I don’t know. It’s been a bit odd between us.”  
“Why?” Isak asked, pulling back his head. The girls never seemed to have problems. “Has something happened?”  
“No. Just… sometimes it feels like we’re not all on the same page. I don’t know, Sana seems a little bummed or something, Vilde and Eva are having problems because Vilde can never hang out, and Chris is bored all the time.”  
“That’s too bad,” Isak shrugged. “Does that happen a lot?”  
Noora let out a soft sigh. “Not really-” they both jumped as the kettle whistled.   
“Oh, I got it,” Isak stood up. He poured them two mugs of boiling water and then let Noora choose her tea.   
“So you and Even have your own place now! Is it magical?”  
Isak laughed and shook his head. “We lived together before, Noora.”  
“Yeah, but now it’s more real! It’s just you guys.”  
“Yeah,” Isak agreed. “Yeah, it’s pretty great.”  
“So… um… I was wondering if I could see…”  
“Cardamom’s on our bed.”  
Noora beamed and stood up. “Can you show me the way?”  
Isak lead her into their bedroom where she burst into coos and snuggled Cardamom into her chest immediately. “Oh, it’s so unfair that you guys get to live with her and we’re all alone.”  
“Um, she is ours,” Isak scoffs. “We did pay for all her stuff and everything.”  
“Whatever. We all miss her.”  
“Well get ready to be even more jealous. We’re getting a puppy.”  
“What?” Noora shrieked, making the kitten in front of her wince. “Oh my god, no way!”  
“Yep, sometime after school starts.”  
“Ugh, you guys are so lucky. Although I can’t really picture you with a dog.”  
“Even’s the dog person but I figure, since he got me a cat, I can deal with a dog.”  
“What type are you getting?”  
“We’re not sure… Even wants a big dog but I don’t want to have to deal with anything too… rowdy.”  
“But you’d be so cute with a big dog! It’d be all over you! Oh it would love you.”  
“I don’t think dogs really like me.”  
“But you’re so likable,” Noora said, only half-sarcastic. Isak smirked.   
“Thanks.”  
“Baby?” Even’s happy voice boomed through the small apartment. Isak smiled.   
“Ew,” commented Noora, wrinkling her nose.   
“What?”  
“I forgot the way you turn into a completely different person whenever Even’s in the room.”  
Instead of replying, Isak rolled his eyes and responded to his boyfriend. “We’re in here!”  
“We?” Even asked, walking to them. He smiled when he saw Noora on the bed and Isak standing beside her. “Well this is a nice surprise!”  
“Halla, Even,” Noora beamed. Even wrapped his arm quickly around Isak’s waist and pulled him in close to peck his cheek before sitting beside Noora. “How are you?” he asked the girl.   
“I’m good! I heard you two are having a nice time here?”  
“Ja, it’s great! We love it!” He sparkled at Isak, who cocked his head with a smirk.   
“And I heard you’re getting a puppy? I’m so jealous!”  
Even laughed. “That’s the plan.”  
“I want a puppy,” Noora whined. Even patted her shoulder.   
“One day, when you’re old enough,” he replied soothingly. Noora glared at him.   
“You think Isak can handle the responsibility?” she asked.   
“Huh?! I’m not a child!” Isak huffed indignantly.   
“Oh, he made us tea before, and I was wondering why he’s allowed to use to stove when you’re not here.”  
Scoffing, Isak rolled his eyes with his whole head. “Are you kidding me? I only left it on once!”  
“And you’re lucky I came home before the whole place went up in flames,” Noora replied. Isak sat down next to them without another word. He leaned into Even’s side.   
“Aw, don’t pout, baby,” Even cooed, making Isak grumpier. Even slung one arm around Isak’s shoulders and pulled him in. The two boys shared a soft moment that made Noora a little bit sad.  
“So we were going to go to lunch, yeah?” Isak asked after pulling back. Even looked between them.   
“Is that the plan?”  
“Yep. Where do you wanna go, Isak? And Even, you’re welcome to come.”  
“Sounds great. I don’t care where we go,” said Even.   
“Okay, maybe Kaffe Brenneriet?” said Isak. Even smiled knowingly and Noora nodded. 

They got there a short while later. “So, what’s the kollektivet like without us?” asked Even as everyone waited for their coffee. Noora rolled her eyes.   
“Quiet. Before Isak ever moved in, I thought it was loud with just Eskild, but now it seems… empty. Plus I’m the only one who knows how to cook again, so I have to make food for everyone.”  
Even laughed. “It’s quiet at ours, too. Feels weird, being all alone.”  
“Yeah. I can’t even tell you how glad I am to have my room back, though. Living with Eskild for nearly a year was not super fun. Especially when he was bringing a boy home every other night before Oliver. At least now they usually go to his.” Isak nodded.  
“Eva said he tried to paint a picture of himself on your wall?” he asked, laughing. But Noora’s smile faltered before she nodded.   
Even sipped his way-too-fancy drink and looked at her curiously. “Is everything alright?”  
“Yeah. Just tired.”   
“Do you want to talk about it?”  
Noora took a deep breath and then smiled. “Nothing’s wrong. I’m just tired.”  
Isak looked her up and down. “You know you can… trust us, right? Even if you don’t want to tell the girls or anything. We can always talk.”  
Noora nodded and patted his hand. “I know. Thanks, Isak.”  
“Mmhmm. But seriously, what’s going on with this party tonight?”  
“What party?” asked Even.   
“We’re going to a party with Sana’s brother and some of his friends. I have no idea what’s going on, they basically just told me to come.”  
“Sounds fun,” Even nodded.   
“Yeah. Well, speaking of, I should head out soon so I have time to get ready.”  
“Okay. It was nice hanging out. We miss you,” Even said. They all stood and hugged.   
“Yeah, we’ll come over to see you guys soon,” Isak continued. He said it into Noora’s soft hair and smiled at the way it smelled like home.   
“You better.”  
“We will.”

That evening, Isak was curled up in bed. Even was making them dinner because Isak was too sore to move because now that they lived alone they could have so. much. sex. And, since Even was the best boyfriend ever, he was making Isak his favorite meal after fucking the sense out of him. But, since Isak was whiney and needy and annoying, he got lonely quick.   
“Babe?” he called, voice hoarse.  
“Ja?”  
“C’mere, please.”  
Isak could hear Even’s footsteps as he approached the room. “Yes?” he asked once he got there, leaning against the doorframe.  
“Is the food almost ready?”  
“Mmhmm. Why? Hungry?”  
Isak shrugged, making Even smirk. “Do you miss me?” he asked, and Isak blushed.   
“No,” he said adamantly. Even laughed.   
“Yes, you did. You absolutely missed me.”  
Isak shoved his face into the pillow. “Can’t you just stay here?” he asked softly.   
“The food will burn, baby,” Even replied, amused. Isak whimpered.   
“Hurry,” he said, and Even chuckled before heading back to the kitchen. He brought Isak dinner in bed a while later. They ate for a while, making small, little jokes and happy talk. They would occasionally make out for a while but Isak was worn down and so they always stopped. Eventually they ended up watching a movie on Isak’s laptop. Isak picked up his phone and scrolled through instagram when the plot lulled. He saw that the girls had posted some pictures from the party.   
Chris had posted a picture of her and several guys and Vilde. Isak lingered on the boy in the upper left hand corner. He recognized him.  
“Even,” he said, holding up the phone. “Is that…”   
Even stared at the photo. He didn’t say anything.   
“Is that Mikeal?”   
After far too long had passed, Even smiled. “Looks like him.”  
“And that’s not… weird to you?” asked Isak. “That he knows the girls?”  
Even’s smile grew wider. “Why would it be?” he asked. And then he clicked off Isak’s phone and dropped it onto the bed. “Now pay attention. This is the best part.”


	47. Chapter forty-seven

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Isak and Even eat dinner, Sana stops by

Chapter 47  
“Even, where is my red sweatshirt?”  
“Yours?” Even called back from the kitchen, smiling at Isak’s frustrated voice.   
“Um, ja?”  
“I believe I was the one who purchased it. Before I even met you, I might add.”   
Isak appeared in the doorway and then walked up behind Even, wrapping his arms around the older boy’s waist and leaning into his back. “But what’s yours is mine, right?”  
Even twisted to look at Isak’s hopeful eyes and scrunched his mouth. “I guess,” he sighed dramatically. Isak huffed and pushed off of him.   
“Whatever, you big bully. I’ll just freeze. And may I point out that you’re wearing my shirt as we speak?”  
Even looked down at the shirt he had on. It was the Jesus shirt. The twenty year old smiled, thinking back to the first time Isak had loaned it to him. But, in order to keep up in the argument, he had to be difficult. “Didn’t you steal this from Eskild?”  
Isak rolled his eyes with his whole head but there was no denying the smile that peeped over his face. “Yes, and therefore it’s mine. Just tell me where your sweatshirt is so I don’t die over here.”  
“I have no idea where it is, Is. You wore it last.”  
“Nei, you did,” Isak whined. “You must’ve. I always leave hoodies where they belong.”  
Even gave him a “really?” look, making Isak sulk. “Stop being mean,” he commanded. Even chuckled and wrapped the smaller boy up in his arms.   
“Are you nervous for school tomorrow?” he asked.   
“Nei.”  
“Really?”  
“It’s not gonna be any different from any other year.”  
“That’s good.”  
“Yeah.” Isak was mumbling into Even’s chest, arms folded between them, body lax. Even smoothed back his hair subconsciously.   
“Is Jonas coming here first so you two can walk over together?”  
“Yeah, and Mags.”  
“Really?”   
“Yeah. Now that I’ve moved here, he’s on the rout, so he’s gonna join Jonas first. I’ll be up and out before you’re even awake.”  
“I’ll get up to make you breakfast.”  
At this, Isak pulled back to look up at Even. “Nei, don’t do that, babe. You should sleep.”  
Even smirked and pressed a kiss to his forehead. “I have stuff to do anyway. Besides, you need to eat.”  
Isak flushed. “I will eat,” he said, and Even rose his eyebrows.   
“Cereal and coffee? It’s your first day of school, you’ll need energy.”  
Pursing his lips, Isak looked to the ground. “Hey,” Even said, raising his chin. “I know you’ll eat. I trust you. But I also happen to know that you cannot cook, so I’m gonna make you something. Okay?”  
Blinking a couple of times, Isak nodded. “Okay,” he breathed. Even kissed him.  
After pulling away, the older boy went back to the food on the stove. “Dinner’s almost ready. Set the table?”  
“Sure.”  
Isak got out the plates and forks and then ripped them paper towels for napkins. He got cups and filled them with water.   
Soon Even was setting out dinner and they both sat down at the kitchen table. “Do you ever worry we’re gonna turn into one of those old couples that never has sex?” Isak asked suddenly, making Even choke on his drink.  
“Excuse me?”  
“You know what I mean. Like those couples who have been married for ten years and never has sex anymore,” Isak replied as if it were completely obvious.   
Even smirked. “Still sore from yesterday?”  
Rolling his eyes, Isak huffed. “Yes, but that’s not why I’m asking. I’m serious. I don’t wanna be old and boring.”  
Reaching across the table, Even stroked Isak’s knuckles. “I promise we’ll fuck at least once a week, every week for all time. We can even set aside a day for it.”  
Isak snorted. “Sexy Saturdays,” he said sarcastically before catching the look on Even’s face and trying to backtrack. “No, no, that was a joke, Even.”  
“Sexy Saturdays!” the older boy cut him off. “You’re a genious! We could put it on the calendar and everything.”  
“Even, nei. I can’t have that on our calendar. Everyone can see the calendar. It’s on the fucking fridge.”  
“That’s why it’s perfect. Just imagine, we’re sitting here with someone. They ask if we wanna hang out on Saturday. I casually say we have plans, and when they ask what we’re doing, I do a smug head nod to the calendar.”  
Staring at Even for a beat, Isak let his mouth hang slightly open. “I can’t believe we live together,” he announced.   
“Come on, it would be awesome!”  
“No. No, it would not.”  
Even laughed. “Fine, we don’t have to put it on the calendar.”  
“Right, because it doesn’t need to happen.”  
“So you’re telling me the idea of knowing that every Saturday night, I’m going to fuck you so good that I’ll have to make breakfast in bed on Sunday doesn’t appeal to you at all?”  
Isak blushed, making Even laugh. “Why are you always so shy?” he asked, making the redness travel further over Isak’s face.   
“Shut up. I’m not shy. I’m bold as fuck.”  
“Okay, little tomato.”  
At this, Isak rolled his eyes again. “Don’t be a loser,” he reprimanded, making Even laugh.   
“How come even when you’re attacking me I still love you?”  
“Because I’m irresistable,” Isak replied, smiling cockily.   
“Oh, are you now?”  
“Yeah.”  
“I guess you’re right,” Even sighed. “I just can’t resist you.” He stood up and walked over to his suspicious looking boyfriend and pressed a soft kiss to the smaller boy’s mouth, bending down and leaning close to him, pulling them flush against each other. As soon as he felt Isak start to get into it, however, he moved his hands from the small of his back to his sides and started poking and prodding, earning a squeak into his mouth and a shove.   
“Stop that!” Isak ordered, but Even had him pinned and was being ruthless. Isak gasped, trying to catch his breath through the laughter.   
“I can’t, you’re just too irresistible,” Even replied, smugly. Just then, however, the doorbell buzzed. Isak shoved Even off of him and grumpily adjusted grabbed his snapback off the radiator.   
“I would appreciate it if you got the door, as I have just been assaulted,” he said. Even laughed and ruffled his hair just before he got the snapback on.   
Walking to the door, Even wondered who was there at this time. He opened the door and smiled confusedly down at Sana.   
“Hei! What are you doing here?”  
Sana popped her dimples at him. “I’ve been texting Isak all night but he hasn’t replied. I’m ninety percent sure he stole my biology textbook last year and I need it for AP bio this year.”  
“Oh,” Even laughed, “of course he did. Here, come in. We were just eating.”  
At that moment, Isak turned the corner. “Who’s here- Sana! Hei! What are you doing here?”  
Sana smirked and cocked her head towards him. “Have you checked your messages in the last hour?” she asked. Isak wrinkled his nose.   
“I have not.”  
“Well, you have my bio book and I need it.”  
Recognition washed over Isak’s face and he raised his eyebrows. “Oh! Is that why I have two?”  
Looking incredulous, Sana stared at him. “Um, ja? Why else would you have two?”  
Isak shrugged. “I don’t know. Anyway, it’s in our room. Are you taking AP next year?”  
“Yeah.”  
“Me too! Maybe we’ll- maybe we’ll be in the same class,” Isak replied, searching through the piles of school books he had stacked up. Sana rolled her eyes at his disorganization, although she knew her room wasn’t the most tidy, either.   
“One can only hope,” she said sarcastically just as Isak yanked a thick textbook out of the pile and turned to her smiling.   
“Found it!” he announced. Sana smiled thinly and held out her hands.   
“Takk. I’ll leave you guys to your dinner.”  
“Nei, stay. You came all this way,” Even cut in from his place on the bed, where he was petting Cardamom.   
“I was in the area,” Sana shrugged. “You guys are eating, so…”  
“Serr. Stay. It’s not like we don’t see enough of each other,” Even insisted, earning an offended huff from Isak.   
“Well… I mean…” trailed Sana.  
“Come on,” Even said, standing and nodding to the hallway. “Do you want anything? Tea? Water?”  
“I’m alright,” Sana said, following him out of the room slowly. Isak bounced after them.   
“So what brings you around here?” asked Even once they all got to the kitchen. He sat behind his plate and gestured for Sana to sit, as well.   
“Nothing, I just had to get some last minute stuff for school,” she replied. Isak got himself another glass of water before sitting down, too.  
“So what’s up with all of you going to a party and not inviting us?” he asked. Sana flushed slightly.   
“What?”  
“Noora told us you were all going to a party with your brother and his squad. I didn’t know you all were friends in the first place.”  
“Elias is not a friend,” Sana said, eyes wide and head shaking.   
“Elias? Elias is your brother?” Isak all but snorted. “Wait, are you guys twins?”  
Sana stared at him in confusion before rolling her eyes. “Nei, not that Elias. My brother Elias is a ‘97er.”  
“Ah,” Isak sighed, nodding with his tongue between his lips. “But seriously, you guys totally flaked on us.”  
“Whatever. Sorry. It wasn’t that great, anyway.”  
“Yeah? It looked pretty fun from the pictures the girls were posting.” Isak glanced at Even, concern briefly lacing his face. Sana wondered what that was about. She decided to ignore it.   
“Yeah, well… it’s weird for me. He’s my brother and all his friends are people I’ve known since I was, like, ten. They practically live at my place. It can actually get quite annoying. Like, this morning I was trying to pray but then one of his stupid friends started blasting music and I came out and he was just dancing around like an idiot. It completely distracted me.” Sana hadn’t noticed the light fondness that had crept into her voice or the smile that had spread across her face until she looked up from the table and caught the bemused but excited look Evak was sharing. She cleared her throat and wiped the smile from her face. “But, yeah. It’s a real pain in my ass.”  
She urged somebody to break the silence by staring at her lap. After a while, Isak spoke. “So… does this annoying dancer have a name?”   
Sana scoffed. “Yousef. But that hardly matters.”  
Even looked away but Isak missed it and smiled at Sana. “Sure,” he said in English. Sana rolled her eyes.   
“Don’t you be an idiot, too. I’ve already lost faith in most of humanity.”  
“Aw, you still have faith in me? That’s so touching!” Isak said, smiling toothily. Sana couldn’t help but smile back, raising her eyebrows.   
“About this much,” she said, raising her hand and holding her fingers about a centimeter apart. Isak pretended to be hurt, clutching his heart.   
“So are you excited to be back in school?” asked Even, finally turning back to face them. Sana widened her eyes and shrugged.   
“I wouldn’t say excited.”  
“But you’ll get to see me everyday!” Isak reminded her.   
Sana stared at him unblinkingly. Even laughed, making Isak pout.   
The two boys finished their dinner and broke out a pint of ice cream. “Care for any?” asked Even. Sana smiled and nodded.   
“You guys get really crazy,” she commented as they moved to the living room and Isak curled into Even’s side, eating his ice cream slowly. She sat beside them and grinned at the way Even slung one arm around his boy’s shoulders and pressed a kiss to the side of Isak’s head.   
“We really do,” he said at the same time Isak whined, “You’re gonna make me spill.”  
Just then, Sana’s phone pinged. 

Mom: Where are you? It’s a school night, honey  
Sana: Sorry. Had to pick up something from a friend’s.  
Mom: Okay, just be home soon.  
Sana: I will<3

By the time she clicked off her phone and tuned back in, Isak and Even were talking about something that seemed to make Isak even grumpier. “Nei, I’m not,” he was saying.   
“What are you talking about?” asked Sana.   
“How Isak is inexplicably cold all the time,” Even told her. Sana laughed.   
“It’s not true! I’m only cold because Even withholds his hoodies from me and hogs the blankets. He’s the one who wears fifteen million layers everyday.”  
“Wanna know a secret?” Even mock-whispered. Isak rolled his eyes.   
“Sure.”  
“I wear a lot of layers for three reasons. I like the feeling, I know you like taking them off of me, and, mainly, you always underdress and end up freezing, so I wear extra so I can give you one.”  
Isak rolled his eyes but it was soft. They had a quiet moment before Even turned back to Sana and asked, “So are you excited for the new year?”  
Sana had no idea how he knew that the Islamic New Year was coming up, but she didn’t ask. “Ja, I am.”  
“Is Muslim new year soon?” asked Isak. Sana nodded. “That’s cool. What do you do?”  
Sana spent the next while explaining the Muslim traditions, with some help from Even. After she finished her ice cream, she got up to go.   
“It was nice having you,” Even said, walking her to the door. “You gotta come with Isak after school. I need my favorite biology buddy in my life.”  
“She’s my biology partner!” Isak shouted from the couch. Sana smirked.   
“You can share me. And yeah, I will.”  
“Good.”  
As soon as he closed the door, Even turned back to a very lazy looking Isak, who was sprawled across the couch. “Halla, baby,” he said. Somehow, no matter how much he enjoyed the company of whomever he was with, Even always found relief in being back alone with his Isak.   
“Halla,” the smaller boy replied, smiling. Even walked over and leaned down for a quick kiss.   
“Come on, let’s go to bed,” he said, and they did.


	48. Chapter forty-eight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Isak's first day of school:)

Chapter 48  
Isak sighed. It was six thirty in the fucking morning and he was trying and failing to turn off his phone alarm with his eyes closed.  
Giving up, he opened his eyes and reached over to swipe snooze. He felt Even’s strong arms snake over his chest and pull him close. “Good morning,” the older boy mumbled, breath tickling the back of Isak’s neck. The smaller boy squirmed around and tucked his face into Even’s neck.  
“Not yet,” he whined after a moment when Even tried to get up.  
“Do you wanna shower?”  
“Nei,” Isak said, shoving his face into the pillow where Even had just been. Even smiled at his sleepy boy.  
“Come on. You’ll feel more awake if you do.”  
“Neiii.”  
Still grinning, Even knelt down beside Isak and smoothed back one of his eyebrows. Isak cracked open one eye and gave him a small smile.  
“Come on,” he said again, pressing a kiss to Isak’s forehead and then grabbing his hand. “Let’s get you up.”  
Submitting, Isak allowed himself to be dragged out of bed and then stomped his way to the bathroom. He yawned and grabbed a towel before turning on the water as Even went to the kitchen to start on breakfast.  
“Isak? Where are the bananas?” he heard shouted through the flat. Isak rolled his eyes.  
“I think you ate the last one!”  
“Uhmm, nei, I didn’t. You must’ve. You’re the banana freak.”  
Isak snorted. “Am not. Anyway, if they’re not there then you’ll have to use something else. I’m getting in now.”  
He got in the shower and allowed himself to relax for a few minutes before reaching for the shampoo. After washing up and turning off the water, he stepped out onto the bathmat and started to dry off.  
“Can I come in?” he heard from the other side of the door.  
“Ja.”  
Isak pulled on his boxers as Even walked in. “Halla,” the older boy greeted, smiling and wrapping his arms around Isak’s middle and squeezing, making him double over.  
“Hei,” Isak giggled as Even shook him around in the aggressive hug.  
“Are you ready for the best breakfast ever?”  
“It better be good,” Isak said, wrinkling his nose when Even started to trail light, ticklish kisses up his neck.  
“It will be. Come on.” Even turned them around and gently pushed Isak towards the door, earning a glare from over his shoulder.  
“I’m not even dressed yet.”  
“Exactly how I like it!”  
Huffing, Isak took a turn towards the bedroom, closing the door behind him, much to Even’s protests.  
He wanted to look good for the first day of school, even though he would just be seeing the same people as ever, so he put a tiny (miniscule, really. Way, way less than Even used.) bit of gel in his hair and tried to style it okay. Then he pulled on his pinky-red short sleeve button down and a pair of jeans. That would have to be good enough.  
“Isak! You’re gonna be late!”  
Sighing, Isak packed up his bag and headed to the kitchen. Even had set out pancakes, strawberries and orange juice. Isak raised his eyebrows.  
“I didn’t know it was my first day of kindergarten,” he commented.  
“Yeah,” replied Even, focusing on pouring his own juice. “Um, I didn’t tell you, but I’ve noticed that your basic reading and writing skills need some work, so I’m sending you back a few grades.” He looked up and flashed Isak a smile. “Sorry, baby.”  
Isak rolled his eyes. “Funny.”  
“I know, I’m hilarious.”  
Isak sat in front of his breakfast and picked away at it while Even psyched him up for his big day. “Isn’t this exciting? You’re gonna be a third year! You’ll be the coolest kid in school.”  
Isak huffed into his fruit. “I always thought third years were, like, on some sort of power high and that’s why they were so cool and courageous stuff. But I just don’t have any strength left to care about stuff anymore.”  
“Don’t pretend you won’t be up late studying every night, Mr. Straight-6s,” Even laughed, and Isak scoffed.  
“Please, I am just a natural genius. I hardly study, I’m way too cool for that.”  
Even smiled and raised his eyebrows. “Yeah?”  
“Yeah. Totally.”  
“Alright, then slacker. When are the boys getting here?”  
“Umm…” Isak checked his phone before rushedly standing up.  
“Are they here now?”  
“Ja!” Isak quickly grabbed his bag and started pulling on his sneakers. Even laughed.  
“Do they want to come up?”  
“Nei, we gotta go.”  
“Okay. Have a good day, baby. Say hi to everyone.”  
As Isak went to run out, Even grabbed his wrist and spun him around for a kiss. “I’ll miss you.”  
“Miss you, too,” Isak said, smiling up at Even for a lingering moment before jumping at the sound of his phone going off and giving Even a last quick peck and sprinting out the door. “Sorry, sorry!” he shouted as the door closed. Even laughed. 

“Halla, boys,” Isak said, finally walking out the front of the building.  
“Bro, there you are! We’ve been waiting for like half an hour,” Magnus complained through their hug.  
“You texted me three minutes ago,” Isak countered. All he got in response was an eyeroll.  
“So are you guys psyched for the first day of third year? This year is gonna be lit, I’m telling you.”  
“Mags is convinced we’re gonna be getting chicks every weekend,” Jonas said, nudging Isak’s shoulder.  
Isak rose his eyebrows and swiveled his head to Mags. “You? Get chicks? It was a miracle that you ever had a girlfriend, now you’re gonna get chicks every weekend?”  
“It’s not that crazy,” Magnus defended. “Chicks dig third years.”  
“Chicks dig cool third years,” Jonas amended, earning a scoff.  
“Come on, I’m cool. I’m cool, right Isak?”  
Isak smiled at his puppy-eyed friend and nodded. “Yeah, Maggie, you’re cool,” he said.  
Magnus beamed. “See? Isak’s got the most game of us all and he think I’m cool.”  
Jonas shook his head and put one hand on his forehead. “Don’t encourage him, Isak. Don’t you know anything by now?”  
“Ja, ja, whatever,” Isak cut through their bickering. “What’s the plan for after school?”  
“Kebabs?” suggested Magnus. “Or pizza? I don’t give a fuck.”  
“I’ve gotta go home, my sister’s on my case because I told her I’d help her with some project but so far I’ve been too busy,” Jonas said. Isak booed him, making the dark haired boy laugh. “It’s called responsibility, Is.”  
“Oh, I know all about responsibility. I’ve been the one paying my own rent for over a year, making my own food, living alone.”  
Jonas and Magnus both snorted and started protesting. “Doesn’t your dad cover, like, half your rent?” asked Jonas at the same time Magnus sputtered, “You can’t cook for shit! Even cooks everything!”  
Isak put up his hands. “All I’m saying is that I’m responsible as fuck,” he clarified, earning more groans and eyerolls.  
By the time they arrived at school, Mahdi was already waiting. “Yo!” he exclaimed, standing and giving each of them a hug. “Ready for third year?”  
“Not really,” Jonas sighed. “It’s gonna be a ridiculous amount of work.”  
“Not for me,” Isak gloated. “I’ll be breezing through.”  
“You’re literally the biggest fucking nerd,” Magnus laughed. “Fy faen, you’re such a loser. You don’t breeze through anything. You ditch us to study all the time!”  
“Well, it’s worth it,” Isak laughed, “considering I have the best grades here.”  
They four boys were about to argue when the dance girls suddenly approached. Mahdi, Magnus, and Jonas got silent and dopey.  
“Hei, Isak,” their ringleader said, flashing him a pretty smile. Isak mentally prepared himself for what was to come. “Soo… we were just wondering if you wanted to come to our party this Friday? For the start of school? You can bring Even, too. And your friends.” She flashed the three boys around him a grin.  
Isak stared at her for a moment. “I might have plans, but these three can probably go,” he said after a beat. He tried not to smile as her face fell. You shouldn’t have said they could come if you didn’t want them there, he wanted to tell her.  
“Oh. Cool. Well, you’re welcome to come if your plans fall through.” She nodded at her posse and they all moved away. Isak had a feeling that was the last invitation he would get. The girls weren’t stupid.  
“Bro, can we really go?” Magnus exclaimed once they were out of earshot. Isak rolled his eyes.  
“Ja, do whatever you want.”  
“Serr? Yes, yes that’s perfect! Guys, we’re totally going!” the blond said excitedly, looking between Jonas and Mahdi. Neither of them looked convinced.  
“I don’t know, man, they’re kind of shallow if they’re only inviting us because they want Isak’s gay ass there,” said Mahdi. Isak scoffed.  
“Where was that attitude last year?” he asked.  
“Last year I wasn’t very educated on gay fetishization. ‘We think it’s cute with two guys’? That’s fucked up,” Mahdi replied.  
Trying to quell a smile, Isak raised his eyebrows. “Been doing research?”  
“Anything for you, my man,” Mahdi replied, and they high fived.  
Magnus was staring at the ground. “What’s wrong with thinking a gay couple is cute?” he asked, looking up with drawn brows.  
“Nothing’s wrong with thinking a gay couple is cute, it’s just weird if you think they’re cute because they’re gay. Like, they should just be like any other couple. Thinking they’re cute specifically because they’re too guys is, like, dehumanizing? And it’s stereotyping, like all gay couples are cute. It’s like asking two girls to make out because lesbians are hot or whatever. Like, a person’s sexual orientation shouldn’t be used to get you off, you know?” answered Jonas. Isak had to pretend not to be impressed and a little pleased that his friend’s cared this much.  
“Okay. But, like, I ship Evak so hard. Is that bad?” Magnus asked.  
“Nei, because you ship them because they’re two people who you like and think make a great couple, right? Not because they both have dicks?” Mahdi replied.  
“Yeah. I mean, if some other guy swooped in, I probably wouldn’t like him. Evak is Evak.”  
“Then you’re good, bro,” Jonas clapped him on the back. Isak rolled his eyes.  
“How come you refer to us exclusively as our ship name?” he asked.  
“Because I came up with it? It’s my right,” Magnus said back, making the boys start arguing about who came up with the name. Luckily, the bell rang and everyone had to head to class. The day went pretty well. Isak had science fourth. He found the room on his schedule and walked in, looking around for any familiar faces.  
From the back corner, Sana smiled at him.


	49. Chapter forty-nine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Even learns about the penetrator song and then meets Isak at school the next day, where they make out and are cute as fuck because Julie BLESSED US, Isak is suspicious.

Chapter 49  
“No, no, stop,” Even wheezed. Isak was sitting uncomfortably beside him, face red, while Jonas and Mahdi blasted the penetrator song.  
“Penetrators come in your face?” Even was laughing, looking around between the three of them. “Weather reports flood, it’s gonna rain come?!” He nearly choked at this point. The chorus started to play, unhelpfully backed by moaning girls, and Isak squeezed his eyes shut to prepare for what was coming.  
“Okay, okay, dude, this is why we made you listen,” said Jonas, making Even get quiet. As soon as Isak’s voice rang through the speaker, his smile exploded, his jaw dropped, and he snapped his head around to face the smaller boy so fast that Isak worried his neck would break.  
“Nei,” he breathed, and Isak wanted to crawl in a hole and die. Jonas had both hands over his mouth and Mahdi was face down in one of their pillows.  
“Daddy thinks, ‘Fucking player. I’m afraid of the signals the russ is sending us.’ Still, he fantasizes about our friends while he fucks mommy with a half-hard cock. I won't judge a damn sex fantasy, but at least we’re the russ, what’s his alibi?” Isak’s first-year vocals were screaming. Even stared at him, mouth getting wider and wider by the second.  
“Is this a joke?” he finally asked, grinning between the boys. Isak refused to acknowledge what was going on, so he just stared at the floor. “You weren’t even IN the penetrators!”  
“Chris said I needed to help since I got them involved with Yakuza!” Isak replied, exasperation lacing his voice. His eyebrows went up in that “I’m completely blameless!” way that Even loved. “They knew I could sing so they asked me!”  
“I didn’t even know you could sing!” Even shot back, making Isak roll his eyes.  
“I rapped for you, like, the day after we met!”  
“You screamed E-box, gimme the beat and then yelled at me for laughing.”  
The high part of the song came on and Even started laughing again. “Damn, this is actually pretty good. Oh fuck, you say the come in your face part, too?!”  
“The chicks screaming in the background,” Mahdi all but sobbed.  
“You were a first year. You were a puppy,” Even said, shaking his head. He’d seen pictures of Isak from first year and, first of all, he was PISSED that he’d never gotten to interact with such an adorable baby (although Isak was still beyond cute) but mostly he was shocked at how fast puberty hit his boy.  
“‘A puppy,’” Isak imitated, wiggling his head. “I was fifteen.”  
“That was the best song I’ve ever heard,” declared Even as it ended.  
“Okay, okay, have you all had your fun?” Isak asked grumpily, although his frown melted when Even tugged him into his side and smattered kissed along the side of his head.  
“Dude, did you expect us not to make him listen after we mentioned it and he had no idea what we were talking about?” Jonas asked, still laughing. “God, I remember when that first came out and you tried so hard to say it wasn’t you singing. You were so full of shit.”  
“It’s embarrassing! I didn’t want people thinking I was like that!”  
“That is the best thing in existence,” Mahdi said, shaking his head. Isak huffed.  
“Don’t we have homework to do? Isn’t that why I am nicely hosting you assholes?”  
“Yeah, and I gotta go to work,” Even added, hopping up and ruffling Isak’s hair. The smaller boy glared at him but he ignored it. “Back around seven, okay?”  
“Ja, okay,” Isak sighed.  
He, Jonas and Mahdi returned to their work and eventually got caught up in, but not before they got to hear Even shouting “VE ARE THE PENETRATORS!” as he left. 

The next day, Isak was headed to science after lunch, Magnus bumbling beside him, going on about something Isak had long since lost interest in, when a familiar pair of hands covered his eyes. He smiled at the “Guess who,” whispered in his ear and wondered when they had become that couple. But, instead of giving a fuck, he turned around and smiled at Even.  
“Hei,” he said, almost embarrassingly happy when Even snaked his arms around his waist.  
“Halla, baby,” Even sighed, pressing a soft kiss to his mouth. After he pulled back he gently rubbed noses with Isak before catching Magnus’s eye and turning to face him. “Halla, Magnus.”  
Magnus grinned. “What are you doing here, bro?”  
“Came for a visit?” Even replied, eyes settling back on Isak. “I had a break between classes.”  
“That was nice,” Isak cooed. “I’m going to science, but it doesn’t start for ten or fifteen minutes.”  
“Join me in the room then?” Even asked, all crinkly smiles and head tilts and bouncing on his toes. When Isak looked down, licked his lips, and then looked back up and raised his eyebrows, Even only laughed and gave a little shrug.  
“Later, Mags,” Isak said, turning on his heel and dragging Even towards his classroom.  
Magnus started complaining, something about how this wasn’t supposed to keep happening now that Even’s at uni, but neither boy could care less.  
As soon as they got to the room, Even lifted Isak onto the window sill and positioned himself between the smaller boy’s legs. “Halla,” he said again, leaning in and meeting Isak’s hungry mouth, gripping his thighs. Even had worked until late the night before and Isak had been tired from working on a history project so they basically ate dinner and then crashed. Which explained why they were both so desperate right about now. “I missed you this morning,” Even murmured, making Isak giggle into his mouth.  
“We were apart for four hours.”  
Even pouted, resting his forehead on his boyfriend’s. “So I can’t miss you?”  
“Nei,” Isak replied, biting his lower lip. Even grinned.  
“Was that a smile?” he asked, and Isak just had time to give a tiny shake of his head before Even was kissing him again, gripping the side of his face rough in that way that drove him crazy.  
He tilted his head to the right, trying to get the kiss deeper and better, and he couldn’t help himself when his leg started shaking a little. He held onto the back of Even’s neck and took a deep breath through his nose before going back at it, and goddamn, he knew they were at school but it wasn’t his fault that he had an incrediably hot boyfriend whose ass was just so grabable. He pulled Even closer to him, feeling the way both of them were getting a little too into this for it to be considered classroom appropriate, but (un)fortunately, somebody chose that moment to walk in.  
Isak cracked open one eye and saw that it was Sana, but Even hadn’t noticed her yet and he was sucking on Isak’s lower lip so Isak pretended that he hadn’t seen her either. Until, that is, she let out a cheerful little, “Halla,” and the boys had to pull apart. Isak couldn’t even be upset with her in all honestly. He could never be mad at Sana.  
“Halla,” he said back, smiling over Even’s shoulder.  
The older boy turned around and gave her a, “Hei!”  
Sana didn’t seem intent on bothering them. She sat down and started to get her stuff out.  
“So, when are you done today?” asked Even, scratching the back of his head. He looked Isak up and down, trying to calculate how much more of the day they could spend making out.  
“Three… thirty?” Isak replied, not entirely sure. “But I think I’m gonna stay back a bit. Do some homework. I have a bio test.”  
“Can’t you just study at home?” Even asked, furrowing his eyebrows and smiling.  
Isak rolled his eyes and scoffed, trying to ignore Even’s hand on his thigh. “I can’t study at home.”  
“Why?!” Even laughed, indignant.  
“I can’t study at home when you’re there!” responded Isak, as if it were entirely obvious. Which, to be honest, it kind of was.  
“Am I distracting?” Even teased, loving the way Isak blushed. He rested their foreheads against one another. Isak laughed. “Am I?” Even chuckled again.  
“Yeah, when you look at me,” Isak replied.  
“I promise not to look at you,” Even said back, earning an incredulous stare.  
They started talking over each other. “What’s the point then, Even? Of studying at home if you aren’t looking at me?” He said it almost scoldingly. Even cocked his head and smiled.  
“That’s true."  
"But, anyway, I have work after school, too,” Isak added.  
Even sighed, pulling Isak closer. “Is that how it’s going to be?” he asked.  
“What is?”  
“You’ll be out working and I’ll be at home waiting for you all day and then making dinner?”  
Isak rolled his eyes. “It’s not that weird that I’m working. I’m thinking of our future. One of us had to…”  
Even made a wounded expression and Isak giggled, making him scrunch up his nose. “Watch what you’re saying now,” he warned. “I’m also working.”  
“But I need to make an income,” Isak informed him.  
“An income?”  
“Mmhmm. That’s why I study so hard.”  
“Yeah, but just because you got to school doesn’t mean you’ll get a good job,” Even argued, and he couldn’t not pepper Isak’s face in kisses when the younger boy rolled his eyes.  
“What’s the logic behind that?” Isak laughed, pushing him away.  
“All of the richest people in the world dropped out of school,” Even said.  
“That’s like one person!” Isak argued, leaning back on the window. “Like Al Gore!”  
“Three!” Even cut in. “Three!”  
Isak scoffed and continued. “All the people who drop out of school are like, ‘You know, Al Gore, he didn’t go to school, and he became rich, so I’m just not gonna go to school! And then I’ll be just like Al Gore!’” he huffed, becoming increasingly flustered. Even grinned and smoothed back one of his eyebrows.  
“Bill Gates?” Even asked. “And Steve Jobs.”  
“Yeah, Bill Gates, Al Gore, Steve Jobs, just model your life after them,” Isak said. Even laughed.  
“I won’t drop out of school,” he assured the smaller boy, sealing the promise with a kiss that ended too quickly.  
“I know you won’t,” Isak mumbled back. “Because I would drop out of your life.”  
“Ha! Was that a threat?” Even asked. Isak nodded. “Okay, now I definitely won’t drop out of school.”  
“Good.”  
“So I’ll see you at home?”  
“Ja.”  
“I’ll miss you.”  
Isak laughed. “I’ll miss you, too.”  
“Yeah?”  
Smiling, the smaller boy leaned in and pressed yet another kiss to Even’s mouth. “Yeah.”  
“Okay. So I’ll see you?”  
“Yes, Even.”  
“Okay.”  
Isak smiled again. “Okay.”  
“Bye,” Even sighed, not moving.  
“Bye.” Neither boy budged until the bell rang. And then Even, far too unceremoniously, kissed his forehead and bounced out of the room. Isak huffed and went to sit down beside Sana.  
She was looking at something on her computer. Isak caught Mikael’s face, along with some other boy, and frowned.  
“Who’s that?”  
Immediately, Sana slammed shut her laptop. “No one,” she said after a second. Confused, Isak sat down.  
“Isn’t that one guy called… Mikael or something?” he asked, pretending to be unsure of his name. He thought back to Chris’s instagram post and wondered how the fuck the girls all knew Mikael.  
Sana shrugged, as if she didn’t know who she’d been facebook stalking. She was acting weird. Isak had no idea what was up.  
“Mikael… how do you know them?” he asked, desperate for answers, but of course the teacher chose that moment to make everyone settle down.  
Sana not-so-smoothly pointed to the teacher and then put one finger to her mouth, covering her face with one hand, eyes wide and a little exasperated.  
Not knowing what to do, Isak stared at her while he opened his bag. He hit himself in the face a little.  
Something was up.


	50. Chapter fifty

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Based on a request for Even reacting to Isak's s4 haircut:)

Chapter 50   
“No,” Even said, voice almost breaking. He was trying to be stern.   
“Even,” Isak sighed, cocking his head to the side. “I’m sorry.”  
“Isak, no. Please,” the older boy said. Isak felt terrible. Even looked near tears.   
Isak looked down at the ground. “I knew this would be hard for you,” he said. “You know I want you to be happy… but I can’t do this anymore, okay? It’s gone on too long.”  
Even let out a long, wobbly breath and gently took Isak’s hand. “I know,” he said, “I’m just really gonna miss it.”  
“It’ll grow back,” Isak assured him, pressing their foreheads together.   
“I know,” Even mumbled, burying his nose in Isak’s precious hair. “Not too short?”  
“Not too short,” Isak affirmed, wrapping his arms around Even’s waist and pulling back to look at him. “You’ll drop me at the barber’s and then go out with your friend, and, when you come back, it’ll be over. And I promise I’ll look basically the same.”  
“Okay,” Even sighed. He tugged gently, almost mournfully, at one of Isak’s curls. The smaller boy smiled and pressed a brief kiss to his mouth.   
“Get your coat,” he said. 

Half an hour later, Isak was sitting in the barber’s chair and Even was having a very serious talk with the barber.   
“I know sometimes it’s easy to go too short when the hair is wet, but I am begging you not to do that,” he said to the increasingly annoyed old man. “If anything, go too long.”  
“I know how to my job, son,” the barber said.   
“I know, and I don’t doubt that, but this is an issue very near and dear to my heart. Please don’t go too short.”   
Isak glared at Even for the millionth time. He was worried that if his boyfriend pissed his barber off any further, he was going to end up bald.   
“Okay,” the man said, giving Even a long, exaggerated nod. Even beamed and clapped his back before bending down to spare Isak a quick, mildly embarrassing kiss and bouncing away. Isak smiled sheepishly at the barber.   
“So, how are you?” he asked as the gown was tied around his neck. He got a grunt in response. 

“Hi!” May said, happily standing up when Even walked into the cafe.   
“Hei,” Even huffed, out of breath. “Sorry I’m late.”  
“It’s okay,” May laughed.   
“I got held up at the barber’s,” Even explained.   
“Oh! You got a haircut?”  
“No,” Even smiled. “I had to drop of Isak. He’s getting a trim but I had to make sure the guy didn’t cut it too short.”  
“Are you getting him after this?” May asked, eyes shining with excitement.   
“Yeah, why?”  
“Can I come meet him? You promised you’d introduce us and I’m dying to meet him.”  
Even laughed. “Sure, let me text him.”

Even: Can I bring May to meet you when we’re done? She really wants to  
Isak The Man Of My Dreams Valtersen: yeah sure  
Even: Okay <3  
Isak The Man Of My Dreams Valtersen: <3

“He says he’d love to meet you,” Even lied, smiling at May. She beamed.   
“Yay! Okay, when will he be done?”  
“An hour?”  
“Great. Let’s order now, then.”

By the time they were done, Isak had texted Even. 

Isak The Man Of My Dreams Valtersen: all set  
Even: Does it look good??  
Isak The Man Of My Dreams Valtersen: nope. He was so annoyed with you that he shaved it all.  
Even: Haha, funny.   
Isak The Man Of My Dreams Valtersen: it won’t be when you see it.   
Even: Don’t scare me, Issy  
Isak The Man Of My Dreams Valtersen: I’m bald, Even. Bald as a monk.   
Even: Stop I’m getting nightmares:(  
Isak The Man Of My Dreams Valtersen: you’re cute  
Isak The Man Of My Dreams Valtersen: it looks fine  
Even: Good<3<3 we’ll be there soon  
Isak The Man Of My Dreams Valtersen: okay<3  
Even: I can’t wait to see your new look, sexy boy  
Isak The Man Of My Dreams Valtersen: hahaha  
Isak The Man Of My Dreams Valtersen: shut you’re the sexy one  
Even: no it’s you  
Isak The Man Of My Dreams Valtersen: shush   
Even: Never  
Even: See you soon baby<3  
Isak The Man Of My Dreams Valtersen: <3

“I’m so excited,” May said, bouncing beside Even as they walked towards the barber’s. “Do you think Isak will like me?”  
“Well he likes Chris,” Even said. “And he likes me, or at least I hope so, and I like you. I think it’s safe to say he’ll like you.” 

As soon as they got to the barber’s, Even scanned the room for Isak. He found him sitting in one of the waiting room chairs, playing a video game on his phone. His hair was… gorgeous.   
“Is that him?” May whispered excitedly, pointing to the blond boy. Even smiled and nodded.  
Isak glanced up and saw them. He grinned and came over. “Halla, I’m Isak.”  
Even could tell that his smile was a little forced and that his voice was a little too polite, but May looked smitten. “Hei!” she exclaimed, beaming. “Oh, you’re so handsome, oh my god! I’ve been waiting ages to meet you.”  
Isak flushed. “Thank you,” he said, glancing at Even, who gave a little shrug. He didn’t like the tenseness in Isak’s shoulders, so he walked to the smaller boy and engulfed him in a hug.   
“You look great. I love it.”   
“Yeah?” Isak asks softly, and Even hates the insecurity on his face. He knew he made too big a deal of it.   
“Yeah. You look awesome.”  
Isak blushed and smiled, leaning into Even’s side. “Oh my god you guys are too cute,” May said, making Isak tense again, but Even rubbed his shoulder and tried to relax him a little.   
“We are, aren’t we?” he asked playfully, pressing a kiss to the side of the younger boy’s head.   
May pretended to swoon. “I like your haircut, by the way,” she added after recovering. Isak smiled for real this time.  
“Thank you.”

They all walked back to their apartment, May and Even talking cheerily the whole time while Isak stayed more quiet and reserved. He’d been making small talk all day and he was drained from it.   
“Annnd, welcome to our humble abode,” said Even as he dramatically swung open their door. Isak giggled softly at his boyfriend’s antics.   
“Ooh, I like it!” said May, looking around. She inspected the walls, smiling at the movie posters Even had hung up. “Very artsy.”  
“It’s all me,” Even assured her. “Isak’s a big science nerd.”  
“I could never understand science,” May sighed, sitting on their couch. “That’s so cool that you’re good at it.”   
“Thanks,” Isak said, sitting tentatively on the other edge of the couch. Even sat between them and slung one arm around Isak’s shoulders, who nuzzled into him like a lost puppy. Even smiled. 

After a while had passed and May had left, Isak and Even were still cuddling on the couch. Even was playing with the smaller boy’s freshly cut hair.   
“It looks so nice,” he cooed, pressing light kisses to the shell of Isak’s ear and down his neck. Isak squirmed.   
“Well it wasn’t fun to get,” he said. “The barber hated me because of you.”  
“I just didn’t want him ruining your pretty hair,” Even pouted, and Isak rolled his eyes.   
“You’re such a loser,” he said, earning an offended gasp and a shove to the shoulder. He caught Even’s hand as the older boy was retracting it, however, and pulled the older boy close to him. “Mine,” he said simply, holding onto the hand and snuggling into the crook of Even’s arm.   
“Yours,” Even affirmed, planting a kiss to Isak’s head.   
“I liked your friend. Although it felt strange hanging out with Chris’s cousin,” Isak mumbled.   
Even chuckled and rubbed his shoulder. “She liked you, too. It would be hard not to.”   
“I know,” Isak said seriously, nodding. Even laughed and pulled them both down, so that Isak was laying on his chest. He flailed helplessly for the remote, but it was slightly too far away.   
“Baby,” he said pleadingly, looking up at Isak, who rolled his eyes. He pushed off of Even’s stomach and grabbed the remote in one fowl swoop. Even coughed and oofed at the intrusion.   
“Here,” said Isak, handing him the remote and settling back down. Even rolled his eyes and turned on the TV. 

After a while, Isak phone pinged and he checked it. 

Magnus: broooos what’s going on tonight  
Mahdi: I’m not doing anything  
Mahdi: does anyone have a place?  
Magnus: not really  
Jonas: nothing

Isak sighed and quickly typed out, “Me neither.”  
“The boys want to go out,” he informed Even.   
“They could come here,” the older boy suggested, and Isak buried his face in Even’s shirt.   
“Neiii,” he whined. Even laughed and petted his hair.   
“Come on, we could show off your haircut.”  
“I’m tired, Ev,” Isak said pitifully.   
“From May and the barber?” the older boy laughed. Isak looked up and glared at him.   
“I always get tired after meeting people.”  
“I know,” sighed Even. “But it’s just the guys.”  
Huffing, Isak pulled out his phone again. 

Isak: You guys could come here if you want  
Isak: to chill  
Isak: not a party  
Magnus: sounds good to me  
Magnus: I can bring a pizza  
Mahdi: *thumbs up emoji*  
Jonas: yeah, sounds good  
Jonas: see you guys soon

By the time everyone was there, Isak was happy to have them. He and Jonas were having a heated conversation about the economy while Mahdi and Magnus were playing slap and Even was making some fancy appetizer.   
“Ha! That’s five in a row. Dude, you suck at this,” said Mahdi as he hit Magnus’s hand again.   
“It’s not fair! You have, like, super human reflexes,” protested Magnus. Mahdi slapped his hand again and he yelped. “I wasn’t ready!”  
“Okay, food is ready,” said Even, walking in with the plate. Turns out he’d only made potato skins, which wasn’t as fancy as Isak had anticipated, but all the boys scrambled over to eat. They’d finished the pizza a while ago.   
As Isak started to eat, Even came up behind him and stuck his whole face into the smaller boy’s hair. Isak jumped and nearly choked, turning around to shove at him.   
“What the fuck?” he laughed. Even was smiling.  
“It has that fresh cut smell!” he defended. He wrestled Isak back into his embrace and buried nose in the soft, blond curls.   
“It looks good, man,” commented Jonas. Isak smiled, still being held captive from behind.   
“Thank you,” he said. To Even, he added, “I’m going to put up my hood if you don’t stop.”  
Even gasped. “You wouldn’t dare.”  
Giving him a “try me” look, Isak wiggled away and sat down at the table.

The next day, Isak was sitting on the couch, trying to finish his homework. He was incrediably bored, however, and so he eventually opened his phone and started scrolling through instagram.   
He saw that Noora had posted a picture with Linn and frowned. He really needed to go visit.   
After a while, he came across the picture of Chris and those boys again. He stared at Mikeal, an uneasy feeling growing in his stomach. After debating for a moment, he switched to his messages and started texting Sana. 

Isak: Biology, chlorophyll, organisms, enzymes, photosynthesis, mitochondria, biology, biology, biology.  
Isak: Should we chat about something else for once?  
Sana: What do you want to chat about Isabell

Isak rolled his eyes at the stupid nickname but continued typing anyway. 

Isak: Do you know that guy Mikeal well?  
Sana: Mikeal?  
Isak: Yes the guy on the picture you were looking at in biology  
Sana: Now you’re talking biology   
Isak: Lol. But seriously  
Sana: Distant acquaintance  
Isak: Who is he?  
Sana: Why?  
Isak: Just wondering  
Isak: I think he’s an old friend of Even’s from Elvebakken   
Sana: so nice  
Isak: come on  
Sana: I think he went to Elvebakken, yeah  
Isak: How do you know him?  
Sana: Is everything good with you and Even or

Feeling his defensiveness flare immediately, Isak frowned. Of course things were good between them. He knew Sana was only looking out for him but Even was the man of his fucking dreams, excuse me. 

Isak: Livin la vida loca  
Sana: Hasta manjana. gotta go  
Isak: YOU CAN’T RUN AWAY FROM THE INTERNET GURL

Sana didn’t reply. Frustrated, Isak typed out a million angry face emojis before deleting them all.   
“Who are you texting?”  
Even’s voice made Isak jump a foot. He hadn’t even realized he’d entered the room. He slammed his phone face down on the desk. “Nobody!”  
Ignoring Even’s suspicious, look, he got up and walked to the older boy, dragging them both onto the bed. “Snuggle with me,” he begged. Even obliged, pulling Isak tight to him and peppering his face in kisses.   
“I really do love the hair, you know,” he said.   
“And I really do love you,” Isak replied. Even tightened his grip.


	51. Chapter fifty-one

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Evak visits the kollectiv, Isak worries about his boy<3

Chapter 51  
“Okay, so this is kind of gonna be a big deal,” Isak said.  
“I know,” Even replied.  
“No, seriously. I once went to see my parents for a weekend and he cried when I got back.”  
Laugh falling slightly off his face, Even looked down at the younger boy. “Actually?”  
“Yeah. He’s the most dramatic person known to man, so yeah. And this time it’s been two weeks, so.”  
“That’s sweet,” Even cooed. “It’s gonna be such a fun night.”  
“It’s gonna be weird. I swear to god if they treat us like guests, I’m gonna die,” Isak whined.  
“They won’t,” Even said. “Don’t pretend you’re not excited to see them.”  
“I see Noora everyday anyway.”  
Even smoothed back Isak’s hair, forehead creasing at the constant deflections. “Are you actually nervous?”  
Sighing, Isak shuffled slightly. “No. I mean, I just… what if it’s different?”  
“It’ll be a little different, yeah, but that doesn’t mean they don’t love you just as much.”  
Isak mumbled something, making Even dip a little lower in order to hear him. “What was that?”  
“I just don’t wanna feel like I’ve lost another family.”  
And then, smiling a bittersweet smile, Even pulled Isak into his embrace and rested his chin on top of the smaller boy’s head. “You haven’t.” 

The door was opened almost before they rang the bell, and then, before Isak understood what was happening, he was being lifted off his feet in a bear hug he’d only ever seen given to Noora, and even then, only on special occasions. And then they were moving, moving for God’s sake, and then at least his feet were back on the ground in the kitchen, and he was being squeezed so tight he thought he might pop.  
When Eskild pulled back and looked down at Isak, smoothing his creased forehead, the older boy only whispered, “Halla, guru baby. I’ve missed you.”  
Isak glowed up at him. “I’ve missed you, too.”

By the time the dinner was in full effect, everyone was having a great time. Noora was laughing so hard she nearly peed herself about the dumb story Eskild was telling. Linn, who’d given Isak the most fond, almost awestruck smile when she saw him and said, “Hei,” with the softest, happiest voice, was rolling her eyes and correcting Eskild when his exaggerations got to be a little too far-fetched.  
When the story died down, Eskild turned to Even with a smile. “What about you guys? How’s the new place?”  
“It’s so good,” Even replied, beaming as he took Isak’s hand. “Believe it or not, Isak’s become kind of a neat freak. I think it’s a mixture of not having Noora to pick up after him and being a proud little home owner.”  
“I would hardly say I’ve become a neat freak, Even,” Isak huffed.  
“You’re always yelling at me for leaving my socks around! And you pick up all the plates and stuff.”  
“That’s because it’s unsanitary,” whined Isak with a roll of his eyes. “There’s a difference between being a neat freak and wanting to live in a mildly tidy place!” he said each word with that flare of grumpy dramatism that Eskild had missed so much.  
Noora had settled down from laughing and now, even though she was smiling, Isak hadn’t missed the vacantness that had gotten into her eyes. He’d expected her to crack a smile when Even had mentioned her cleaning habits but she seemed distracted.  
“So we hear you’re getting a puppy?” said Eskild.  
“I’m so jealous. We never do anything fun here,” Linn sighed. Even laughed.  
“Yeah, we’re excited. Isak finally agreed to getting something medium sized. For a while he was insisting that it couldn’t be bigger than Cardamom because she’d be scared of it. It all honestly I think it’s him who’s scared,” Even laughed, putting one arm around Isak.  
The smaller boy rolled his eyes. “Says the boy who’s scared of spiders.”  
“Spiders are terrifying. Everyone’s afraid of spiders. Dogs are fluffy and adorable.”  
“Which is why I’m not scared of them.”  
“Sure, baby,” Even cooed, earning yet another eyeroll. Eskild and Linn stared at them gooily.  
“Okay,” said Eskild after beat, snapping them out of it. “Ready for dessert? We can go to the living room and start that movie, too.”  
“Ja, sounds good,” Even agreed, and everyone stood and started to clear the table.  
Isak watched as Noora trailed slowly behind. 

“Okay, I get to sit with Isak because I miss him the most,” declared Eskild as everyone settled onto the couches. Isak rolled his eyes but was willingly tugged next to his guru, curling up beside him. Eskild absent-mindedly started playing with his hair, in that lovingly goofy way he had. It reminded Isak of the time his mom had showed up, only a month or so after he’d moved in with the Kollektivet.  
He’d already been so tired from going three days with little to no sleep due to a bad attack of insomnia, school projects, stress, and the girl who kept nagging him about why he’d let her make out with him only to push her away when she started heading south. He couldn’t quite remember her name because there were so many girls like her, so many girls he’d kissed and been kissed back by, half-drunk and praying that for once it would work, only to feel disgust curl in his gut anyway. And yeah the pain was bitter but even worse was the frustration. That’s what kept him up at night. And, so, when his mom showed up screaming through her tears that Joseph had come to her in a dream and told her that Isak was going to sin, Isak took a deep breath, calmed her down, and sent her on her way. As soon as the door closed behind her, he sank down and buried his head in his knees.  
“Isak?”  
Isak snapped his head up and then started scrambling to stand. Eskild was staring at him with worry. “Was that your mom?”  
“Nei! I mean- yes, but- everything’s fine,” Isak sputtered.  
“Are you sure?” asked Eskild, scanning the younger boy. “She sounded upset.”  
“She’s fine! She’s just- stressed. She was confused.”  
A frown pulled at Eskild’s mouth. “Okay. Let me put on some tea and we can watch a movie.”  
“Nei, I have work to do and-”  
“Isak,” Eskild sighed, catching his shoulders as he tried to disappear back into his room. “You’re exhausted.”  
Isak had taken a deep breath and willed himself not to cry. “I’m really fine.”  
“Well then let’s be fine together and watch a movie.”  
And, letting some of the tension release from his shoulders, Isak nodded. “Takk,” he whispered. Eskild nodded. They spent the afternoon on the couch, Eskild pulling at Isak’s hair. 

By the end of the evening, Isak and Even were tired but happy. Eskild gave Isak the longest hug and Even a long hug, too, apologizing that “I haven’t given you much attention, I just missed my grumpy son,” and for the first time “grumpy” sounded like a compliment to Isak. The two boys went home hand-in-hand.  
Once they got there, Isak found his mind drifting back to Mikeal. He hated being this way, jealous and insecure and needy pretty much always worried that he was doing something wrong. But he couldn’t help but fear that something truly bad had happened. Of course he could never, ever let it mess with his view of Even, because Isak knew Even in every way a person could know somebody and nothing could ever make him think that the older boy had an evil bone in his body. But now, with the girls hanging out with Mikeal and his friends, Isak feared it would come up again and Even wouldn’t be ready. And, so, as they were changing into pajamas, Isak sat on the bed.  
“Hey, baby?”  
“Hmm?” hummed Even, pulling on a sweatshirt.  
“I saw a picture of that guy, Mikeal, on Sana’s facebook.” He waited for Even’s reaction but none came so he continued. “Do you… do they know each other?”  
Even still wasn’t facing him. Isak started to get worried. “Baby?” he said again, inching forward.  
“I think he was friends with her brother, yeah,” said Even. Isak let out a breath.  
“Yeah, that’s what she said. Okay… do you think it’s weird that they’re all friends?”  
“Why would I?”  
Even turned around, eyebrows raised. Isak flushed.  
“Nei, um… just, if something happened… between you guys… I don’t want it to come up suddenly and… hurt you. With the girls hanging with him and everything. I’m not trying to push or anything, just…” he shifted uncomfortably. When Even didn’t say anything, Isak hung his head slightly. “I’m sorry,” he said.  
“For what?” asked Even. “You haven’t done anything.”  
“Just… I don’t know. I know you don’t like talking about Bakka.”  
“It’s fine, Isak,” Even sighed. “There’s nothing to talk about. Sana can be friends with whoever she wants.”  
Isak nodded. Although Even had said he hadn’t done anything wrong, his heart was still pounding. He was terrified that Even would get angry, or that he already was, which was irrational because Even hardly ever got angry, especially without reason, but, still… Isak had never handled being yelled at well.  
“Do you wanna… do you wanna come to bed?” he asked nervously.  
“I’m gonna brush my teeth,” Even replied. He walked out of the room.  
After watching him go and staring at the door for a few seconds, Isak let himself fall back and opened his phone. Eskild had texted him about how nice it’d been to have them over. Isak smiled, feeling a little better, even though he was slightly worried that he wouldn’t have time to visit again for a while.  
Turns out he had time to visit the next day.  
He, Noora and Sana had been assigned a project together for math, and so they all headed to the kollectiv after school. Isak liked math a lot. Sana didn’t mind it, but Noora despised it, and was very vocal in her hatred. Isak wondered if this is what he sounded like when he was being pissy. “That’s it, I’m lost,” she declared about five minutes in, throwing down her pencil. “How does anyone understand this stuff?”  
“Come on, it’s simple,” Isak said, and he and Sana spent the next couple hours walking Noora through each process. By the time Even stopped by to pick him up, he was definitely ready to meet Jonas for some food and relax.  
Sana went to let Even in, but she was gone for ages. Eventually, Isak got curious and hopped up to look for him.  
He found them in the kitchen. Even’s back was to him and he was saying something about food, but then Sana noticed Isak coming and...huh. She gave Even… a look.  
“Hallo,” he said reaching them. Even turned to face him with surprise.  
“Hi!” he almost laughed, leaning in and giving him a kiss on the cheek, but everything felt a little tense. Isak drew in his eyebrows. “I was just asking Sana where you were.”  
This was odd, because obviously he was in Noora’s room. “Yeah, I’m here,” he replied, looking back and forth between them. Nobody spoke so he smiled and said, “Ready to hit McDonald’s with me and Jonas?”  
“Yeah, of course,” said Even, and his smile was more genuine this time. Isak melted a little.  
“Lovely,” he said. “Sana, wanna join?”  
“No thanks,” she replied, standing. “I better get back to Noora.”  
“Ja, have fun with that,” Isak laughed. “Ready to bail?” he asked Even, who nodded. Sana disappeared with a goodbye and they headed out.  
Even took his hand, running one thumb over his knuckles. Isak sighed. “Hey, Ev?”  
“Ja?”  
“You know… you know that, even though you can tell me anything, you don’t have to, right? Like, you don’t have to feel guilty. I just… I don’t want you to feel bad about anything. You don’t… owe me anything.”  
Even stopped. Isak hated the look on his face. It was the same look he’d worn in saying, “I’ll just hurt you… and then you’ll hate me.” It broke Isak’s heart then and it broke it now.  
“I’m sorry,” Isak sighed, moving to stand in front of him and pressing their foreheads together. “I didn’t mean…”  
“Thank you,” Even whispered, shutting Isak up. His eyes were heavy. “I wish… I wish I could tell you, because I actually owe you everything. But… but I just…”  
Isak pressed a kiss into his mouth, shutting him up this time. “But nothing,” he whispered back. “You’re just the bravest person I know. So let’s get some McDonalds, okay? And if you’re ready to tell me later, we’ll do that. Or if you’re ready in ten years, we’ll do that. Or if you’re never ready, we’ll do that. Okay?”  
Even looked like he wanted to cry and Isak wanted him never to want to cry again. “Okay,” the taller boy said after a moment, and Isak took his hand and lead them away.  
He had meant it when he said he didn’t need to know. Even didn’t have to tell him- it wasn’t his God given right to know Even’s past. But… something about the situation made his stomach twist. He worried that if the girls kept hanging around the old Bakka boys, something ugly would resurface, and Even would get hurt.  
Well, Isak thought, you’ll just have to be there to pick up the pieces.


	52. Chapter fifty-two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> puuuppppyyyyy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For the sake of your mental health, I strongly suggest googling "sheepdog puppy"

Chapter 52  
“Isak.”  
“Mmm.”  
“Issaak, babyyy.”  
“Mmmmm.”  
“Isak, baby. Get up.”  
Isak curled deeper into the pillow. “Nei.”  
“Come on!” Even exclaimed, grinning ear to ear. He laid down beside Isak and the smaller boy burrowed into his side and nosed softly at his collarbone, making Even smile and smooth back his hair.  
“It’s Saturday, Even,” he huffed, cracking open one eye and peering up at the older boy. “I wanna sleep in.”  
“But it’s our big day!”  
“We’re getting a puppy, Ev, not getting married.”  
Even’s smile grew even wider at Isak’s words. “Come on, aren’t you excited! We’re getting our very own puppy!”  
Isak sighed.”Where’s Cardamom?” he asked.  
Scoffing, Even sat up, looked around, and then scooped the little kitty off of the foot of their bed and passed her to Isak, who took her into his arms and nuzzled his face into her soft fur. “Hi, sweetheart,” he said. “We’re bringing home somebody new today. They’re gonna be a little bigger than you, and a little more excitable. But that doesn’t mean we love you any less. Or, at least I won’t. I don’t know about your other daddy.”  
“Hey, don’t tell her that!” Even protested. “Just because I’m a dog person doesn’t mean I don’t love her.”  
“I’m just saying that I won’t let this affect our relationship. I can’t necessarily say the same for you. She is my cat after all. My angel.”  
“Well, I won’t love her any less either.”  
“Mmhmm,” Isak hummed, unconvinced. Cardamom purred against his chest.  
Throwing his arm over them both, Even drew the cuddly duo closer to him. “Can you believe that by tonight we’ll be a family of four?”  
“It’s a dog, Even,” Isak reminded him. Even scoffed.  
“Says the boy who just called us our cat’s daddies.”  
“Whatever. She’s a sweet little baby. This dog is going to be all loud and rambunctious.”  
“It’s perfect! It’s just like us! The sweet, quiet, sleepy and often-times-grumpy little small one, and the big, lovable, excited smiley one!”  
Isak made an offended noise. “I am not grumpy. And neither is Cardamom.”  
“Okay,” agreed Even, not looking to argue. “Can you get up now? I’ll make us breakfast and we then we can head to the place.”  
Liam, Even’s friend from uni, had a dog back home who just had puppies. When Even mentioned that they were thinking of getting one, he said his mom had was looking for people to give them to. At first, Isak had been put off my the idea- a sheepdog, Even? Really?- but Even was so earnestly excited and cute about that whole thing he just couldn’t say no.  
“Mm. Fine. But you better make something good.”  
“Pinky swear!” Even replied excitedly, hopping up and almost running towards the kitchen. Isak rolled his eyes.  
“What are we going to do with him?” he asked the kitten who’d fallen asleep against his chest. After a few more minutes of procrastinating, he got up and followed his boyfriend.  
“Halla,” he mumbled, leaning into Even’s back. “What are you making?”  
“I’m trying to make french toast, but I don’t know how well it will come out,” Even replied. Isak smiled.  
“I’m sure it will be great.” He pressed a soft kiss to the back of Even’s neck and then walked to the kitchen table, sitting down and taking out his phone. 

Isak: Does anyone wanna come over tomorrow and meet our puppy?  
Magnus: Puppy?!  
Magnus: omg what?!  
Mahdi: bro they’ve only been talking about it for the last ten years  
Jonas: wish I could but I gotta help my sister with something  
Magnus: they have not been talking about it for ten years!! What?!?  
Isak: what do you have to help her with  
Mahdi: they’ve been talking about getting a puppy for a couple of weeks mags  
Jonas: she needs to get some stuff for school and my mom says I have to bring her  
Isak: ahh that sucks  
Magnus: That is so exciting! I will totally come over!  
Mahdi: I can’t either, we have family stuff  
Magnus: omg I get evak all to myself  
Isak: don’t make it weird mags  
Magnus: what?  
Magnus: why is that weird?

Opting out of a response, Isak put his phone down. “It’s okay if we Mags comes over tomorrow, right?”  
“Ja, sure,” Even replied before turning and smiling. “Here,” he said, passing Isak a plate with a piece of french toast on it. Isak took it gratefully and started eating.  
“I was right,” he declared.  
“What?”  
“It is great.”

After eating breakfast and sharing several syrupy kisses, the boys were on the tram headed to Even’s parents. They had to borrow their car so they’d have something to bring the puppy home in.  
“Hei!” Even shouted as they walked in, kicking off his shoes. “Mama? Papa?”  
“In the living room, baby,” Even’s mom called back.  
Isak followed as Even made his way to the living room. “Halla,” the older boy greeted, delighted about everything.  
“Hi! We’ve been missing you boys!” Even’s mom said, standing to give them both hugs. She was pretty in the way Even was, with long blond hair and sky blue eyes and a sunny face that made everything in the world seem a little brighter. Even’s dad was tall, unsurprisingly, with slightly darker hair and brown eyes and a booming laugh and a very firm hug that Isak had not been expecting the first time. This time, however, he was ready. Once the man had pulled away, he looked down at Isak. “You cut your hair,” he pointed out.  
“Yeah,” Isak affirmed. “It was getting really long.”  
“It looks sharp,” Even’s dad approved, walking over to his wife and wrapping both arms around her waist, resting his head on top of hers.  
“Thank you,” Isak smiled.  
“So are you boys excited?” asked Even’s mom.  
“So excited,” Even answered, grinning. Isak smiled fondly and nodded.  
“We’re excited for you,” said his dad. “Here, I’ll get the keys.” He let go of his wife with a soft kiss to the back of her head before disappearing.  
“So how are you?” the woman asked, sitting down again.  
“Great,” Even said.  
“Yeah?” she asked again, looking to Isak this time.  
“Yeah. We’re great,” the younger boy agreed, earning an affectionate smile.  
“I’m so glad,” she said. Just then, her husband returned with the keys, tossing them at Even.  
“Drive safe,” he said. “Don’t let the dog ruin the car, if you please.”  
“We won’t, papa,” Even laughed. Usually he would stick around to chat with his parents longer but he was hyper and eager and pulling Isak towards the door. “We’ll come over soon!”  
“You better!” his mom called back, and then Isak was giving a half-wave while quite literally being pulled out of the house.  
“Well that was rude,” the younger boy commented, but there was no malice behind it. He was smiling and Even was smiling and pressing gentle kisses against his mouth.  
“They’ll understand. Now let’s go! There is a puppy waiting for us! Liam said they’re all adorable.”  
Isak huffed a little because if there was one part of this whole endeavor that he was really not looking forward to, it was having to meet Liam. He didn’t have anything against the guy, of course not. He seemed nice by all accounts. But. Meeting people. That was not very high up on Isak’s list of prefered activities.  
As if reading Isak’s mind, Even rolled his eyes. “You’ll like him. I promise.”  
“I’m sure I will,” Isak lied, not wanting Even to feel bad for dragging him to this place. The older boy narrowed his eyes before smiling and pressing a kiss to Isak’s head.  
“Come on, let’s get in the car,” he said, walking towards it. He opened Isak’s door with a cheesy, “After you, my love,” that made the smaller boy roll his eyes.  
Liam’s mom didn’t live far away, so they got there relatively fast. Even practically ran to the door and rang the bell. “Hi!” he said excitedly as soon as his friend opened it. Isak was still coming up the lawn.  
“Hey,” Liam replied. He wasn’t very tall, probably 5’10 or 11, and he had dark hair and lighter eyes. He smiled at Isak over Even’s shoulder. “I’m Liam.”  
“Isak,” the blond boy introduced himself. “It’s nice to meet you. Even’s mentioned you lots of times.”  
“Yeah, same,” Liam replied. He stepped aside. “You guys can come in. Mama’s up her room with Daffodil and the puppies.”  
Even almost squealed and Isak had to close his eyes in order to stop smiling so much.  
Liam lead them up to the room where his mother and the dogs were waiting. Immediately, Even kneeled down into the pile of puppies, and Isak had to admit he’d never seen anything cuter.  
While Even was introducing himself to Liam’s mom, Liam came up behind Isak.  
“Dog person?” he asked, cocking his head.  
“Mm, not really. But Even puts up with our cat-”  
“I do not put up with her, Isak, I love and respect her, just as you will this puppy!” Even cut him off. The younger boy rolled his eyes.  
“Sorry, Even loves and respects our cat even though he’s a dog person, so I’ll love and respect a puppy.”  
Liam laughed a little and nodded. “Sounds good. These pups should get along fine with a cat, too. We have cats, so yeah.”  
“That’s good.”  
“Help me pick, Is,” Even commanded. Isak was leaning in the doorframe, not participating much in Even’s big decision.  
“Get whichever one you want,” he replied, earning a pout. “As long as it doesn’t hate me I’ll be fine.”  
“Nobody could hate you,” Even replied, and Isak flushed and looked down at his shoes. How Even managed to be so affectionate around everyone always amazed him.  
“God, and I thought you were a sap when Isak wasn’t here,” laughed Liam.  
“I can’t help myself, I’m surrounded by too much adorableness,” Even said back, and Isak swore that his boy had swallowed the sun because every part of him was glowing. Even petted the puppy in his lap and then looked back up at Isak with hopeful eyes. “I think I found the one. Come here.”  
Smiling fondly, Isak walked over and knelt beside him.  
The puppy was certainly cute. It was tiny, although Isak knew it would get bigger, and it was the fluffiest thing he’d ever seen. It’s back half was mostly black and his front mostly white, except for a black ring around one eye. “Hei,” he said softly, taking it from Even’s lap and running his hand through it’s soft fur. The puppy yipped quietly and padded around his thighs, sniffing him with a wet nose. Isak laughed. “He seems like a good one,” he told Even, who beamed.  
“Hear that, little buddy? You’re coming home with us!”  
“What will we call him?” asked Isak.  
“Didn’t you want to call him Baz?”  
“Yeah but is that what you want?”  
Even gave him an incredulous look. “You think I don’t want a puppy called Baz?” Suddenly, the older boy lit up. “A Puppy Called Baz! It sounds like a book!”  
“You’re not writing a book, Even,” Isak sighed, running his hand over Baz’s head.  
“Come on, it’d be the perfect kid’s book!”  
Isak decided not to reply and instead kept cuddling Baz. “I’m the rational one,” he said, earning an offended gasp.

By the time the two boys said goodbye to Liam and his mother and were packed in the car, Even was absolutely bouncing with excitement.  
“Okay, where’s the crate?” Isak asked, the wriggling puppy in his hands. Even’s smile faltered.  
“Crate?”  
“Yeah? The pet-carrier thing?”  
Even just stared at him. Isak groaned. “Even!”  
“What?! I’m sorry, okay? I was excited!”  
“Ugh- what are we supposed to do now?”  
“I guess you’ll have to hold him,” Even said almost pleadingly.  
“I swear to god, if this dog pees on me or rips my shirt or does anything we’re bringing him back.”  
Baz let out a whimper and Isak smiled down at him. “I’m sorry, little one. It’s not your fault that Even can’t be prepared for the life of him.”  
“Says the boy who’s wearing the hoodie that I put on this morning because he got cold!”  
Isak waved his hand dismissively. “Nobody can predict the weather, Even. What you can predict is that you’ll need a pet carrier crate for a dog.”  
“Hmm. Just get it,” Even said, glaring playfully at his boyfriend. Isak got in the passenger's side, holding Baz carefully in his lap.  
“Drive really carefully,” he told Even, who clutched his chest in pain.  
“You think I’d put this little fluffball in danger? Or Baz?”  
Isak rolled his eyes. “Come on, corny, just drive. Cardamom’s probably a mess waiting for us.” He held Baz up to his face. “You’re gonna have a sister!”

The boys got home soon after. Isak was still holding Baz and his hands were sweating like crazy. The little dog yipped and squirmed as they headed up the stairs.  
“Here, I’ll take him,” said Even, reaching over and grabbing the puppy out of Isak’s hands. He stroked his head soothingly. “Here, you’re okay. We have a little bed for you in our room, and good food and a bowl of water! And you’ll get to meet our kitty! Won’t that be fun?!”  
Baz licked at his face, making Even laugh with his entire chest. Isak grinned. God, he could never get used to that sound.  
Unlocking the door to their place, the smaller boy was immediately greeted by a purring cat. “Hei, baby girl! Come here,” he cooed, picking her up and cuddling her to his chest. He kissed the top of her head and then wiped at all the fur that came off on his mouth. Ugh. Shedding season.  
“Is that Cardamom?” asked Even.  
“Ja.”  
“Good! They can meet each other then!”  
Even came in behind Isak and shut the door behind him. “Cardamom, sweetheart, we have somebody we want to introduce you to.” Smiling, Even tentatively held the puppy out to Cardamom.  
Baz sniffed her, tiny tail wagging, and then licked at her face. Cardamom hissed and wiggled, making the puppy start to whimper. “Aw, come on,” Even pleaded. “You guys can be friends.”  
Even carried Baz to the couch and gestured for Isak to follow. They put the two tiny animals down and made wall around them with their arms and bodies, kneeling in front of them. Cardamom went to Isak and nuzzled into his chest, turning away from the little dog, but Baz padded after her and nosed at her back. She glared at him with one eye and then settled down in a little circle, burying her head in her paws. Baz squirmed nervously for a moment before settling beside her in the exact same position. Sometimes he peaked at her to see if she was still moving, but soon they were both asleep against Isak.  
Even pouted. “It’s no fair,” he whined. “Now he’s gonna do everything she does and she loved you best!”  
“Oh, baby,” Isak sighed fondly, pushing himself higher on his knees so he was hovering slightly above Even. He pressed a deep kiss into his boyfriend’s mouth, hands on his cheeks, before pulling away and resting their foreheads together. “He’ll love you a lot. Especially since you’ll be the one walking him everyday.”  
“Um, when did I agree to that?”  
“Who cleans Cardamom’s litter box? And feeds her, might I add?”  
Smiling, Even rubbed their noses against one another. “You’ll walk him with me. You love me too much to say no.” He pulled Isak closer by his waist so that the smaller boy was sitting reverse in his lap.  
“Only if it’s nice out,” Isak conceded. “We’ll be one of those sickeningly domestic couples who walks their dog together.”  
Even grinned. “And he’ll stop and play with other dogs and we’ll make dog friends.”  
“The boys will get jealous,” Isak murmured, sinking his face closer and closer to Even’s so that their lips were brushing as they spoke.  
“They’ll get over it. Soon they’ll be coming to the little neighborhood gatherings, too.”  
“Yeah?”  
“Yeah, baby.”  
Isak smiled and kissed Even again, very aware of that fact that their crotches were right against each other as he lightly grinded down. “What are you doing?” Even laughed.  
Isak kept kissing him. “Come on, you’ve been so cute all day, you think I don’t wanna fuck?”  
“Isak! Not in front of Baz! He’s a baby!”  
“He’s asleep,” Isak argued, pushing Even back onto his palms as he deepened their kiss. Even smiled and pulled at his hair. He tilted them slightly so that Isak was resting on the ground and then climbed on top of him, basically reversing them from the position they’d just been in. Isak moaned.  
“Come on, baby boy, let’s go to bed,” Even breathed into his mouth.  
“Why? It’s our apartment.”  
Even smirked. “Naughty. I like it. But I’m not fucking in front of a newborn puppy.”  
Isak groaned and buried his head in Even’s shoulder. “Way to kill the mood.”  
Laughing, Even stood him up. “Come on. We have a perfectly comfortable bed about twenty steps away.”  
Isak sighed and let himself be dragged to their bed. 

It was nearing seven in the evening and the boys were still in bed, having a long, lazy conversation. “Should we check on the pets?” Isak asked after a while.  
Even was about to reply when their door creaked open. “Looks like we don’t have to,” he laughed. Cardamom walked into their room while Baz padded loyally behind.  
“Man, she’s got him wrapped around her finger,” Isak commented. “I don’t think it was really intentional.”  
“It’s cute,” Even smiled. She jumped onto their bed and walked to Isak, kneading at the comforter before burrowing herself into his side. Baz tried to follow but she glared at him. “Aww, she doesn’t want to share you,” Even said, taking the little puppy from Isak and putting him on top of his bare chest. “It’s okay. You can sleep here.”  
As Isak ran his hand over Cardamom’s head, he smiled. Baz layed down on Even’s chest, resting his head on his paws, and shut his little eyes.  
“I don’t think I can ever move again,” Even announced. “Or, at least not until he does.”  
Isak laughed. “Are you happy, babe?” he asked, and Even looked at him and gave him the most blinding smile.  
“The happiest I’ve ever been.”


	53. Chapter fifty-three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mags comes over, Isak gives him A Talk, Isak is tired

Chapter 53  
“Oh fuck,” Isak panted, hands curling into fists against their wall. “Oh fuck fuck fuck, fuck Even, he’ll be here in like ten-”  
His warning was cut off when Even hit his prostate hard and all he could do was let out a choked, high pitched sound. “Then hurry up and come,” Even growled into his ear, pulling their bodies even more flush together, digging his nails into Isak’s hips.   
“I- fuck, I’m close. Harder, Even, please-” Isak groaned, banging his forehead against the wall. Even sucked harshly at the side of his neck, biting and blowing until he was satisfied with the dark mark that had bloomed across it.   
“Are you gonna come for me? Are you gonna be good for me, baby?” he asked, and Isak trembled.   
“Yes- yes, please, I have to-”  
“Come on, come now baby boy. You’re gonna make us late and I’m gonna have to punish you, yeah? Is that what you want?”  
“Fuck, Even, please-” Isak sobbed, and he knew it would be any second now.   
“What? What do you want?”  
“I needa- now-”  
“Then come!” Even reached around and jerked him once and the Isak was coming, quick and shuddery and hard, so fucking hard. He grinded his ass back into Even as his boy continued thrusting in and out of him, hot and slick and he was so overstimulated but if he could get Even to come, too, it was worth it.   
Finally, finally he felt Even filling him up. They both rode down their highs for a moment, Even panting into Isak’s shoulder and Isak panting against the wall, and then Isak realized the time.   
“Out, out!” he said, wiggling his ass, and Even almost laughed before pulling out. Isak pushed off of the wall and went to walk away but Even caught him, spinning him around and giving him a few sweet kisses.   
“You okay?” he asked. Isak pouted.   
“Nei, I told you we didn’t have time and you made me-”  
“But we did have time! See?”  
Rolling his eyes, Isak grabbed his phone. “Yeah, but Mags will be here in-” he checked his messages. “Fuck, he said five minutes three minutes ago!” The smaller boy squirmed out of Even’s embrace and literally waddled to the bedroom. “You clean up out here!” he shouted behind him.   
Chuckling, Even picked up his boxers and slid them on. He grimaced at the task of cleaning Isak’s come off the wall but did it anyway and then gathered up their discarded clothes. Then he followed his boyfriend to the bedroom.   
“Ugh, fuck, Even! Was this- was this necessary?!” Isak said as soon as he came i, staring in the mirror and gesturing annoyedly to the very, very prominent hickey blooming where his jaw met his neck. “What am I supposed to do about this?”  
Even wrapped his arms around Isak’s waist and pressed a kiss to the exact spot. “Leave it. Nobody cares.”  
“Mmhmm,” Isak said, pouting again. “What does it matter if I look indecent all the time? Nobody cares!”  
“Exactly,” Even chuckled, resting his head on Isak’s shoulder and earning a glare.   
“Get off,” the smaller boy whined. He pushed Even away and pulled on a clean sweater and then a pair of jeans.   
Since his hair was not going to look presentable anytime soon, he pulled a beanie over it and tried to adjust himself.   
“Do I look okay?” he asked, turning to Even.   
“You look delicious,” Even replied, earning a hoodie thrown at him. He smiled but his smile faltered when he noticed how dark the rings under Isak’s eyes had gotten. He prayed things weren’t getting bad for him again.   
“Fuck, Magnus is here. Come on. And don’t say anything suggestive or I swear your ass is sleeping on the couch,” Isak declared before walking out of the room.   
“Was that a threat?” Even called after him. 

As soon as Isak opened the door, he was getting hugged. “Hei, Maggie,” he said, stumbling back a bit.   
“I’m so excited!” Magnus all but squeaked, pulling back. “I love puppies! They are literally the cutest thing in the world!”  
“I thought you were a cat person,” laughed Even, coming up behind his boyfriend and putting one hand on the small of his back.   
“I like both,” Magnus replied casually, and then he narrowed his eyes and looked between the two of them before bursting into a smile. “No way! You guys just fucked!”  
Isak groaned and threw his head back. “What the fuck, Mags!”  
“Ha!” Magnus squawked. “Ha, I’m totally right! That’s awesome!”   
“How could you tell?” Even was laughing. Isak whacked his chest.   
“Come on, you both look like shit and you didn’t even bother fixing your hair-” he gestured to Even- “and Isak’s got that massive hickey and-”  
“Okay, okay,” Isak cut him off. “Now you chose to be perceptive,” he mumbled, hiding his face in Even’s chest.   
“It’s okay, baby,” Even soothed, but then Isak was pushing away from him.   
“Um, nei?! This is all your fault anyway, Mr. I-need-you-so-bad-it-hurts!”  
“Ha!” Magnus laughed again and Isak rolled his eyes.   
“You’re both useless!”  
“Don’t be mad,” Even laughed as Isak stormed into their room, flipping them both off over his shoulder.   
“Come on, Baz is in our room,” Even added to Magnus. “Isak will probably be grumpy for a while but he’ll get over it.”  
“Should I not have pointed it out?” asked Magnus, genuinely concerned. Even clapped his back.   
“Nah, he’ll be fine. He’s just dramatic.”  
“Okay.”  
They got to the room and sure enough Isak was pouting on the bed, holding Cardamom in his lap. He was purring as he stroked her soft fur. His other hand was on Baz, who was whining pitifully for attention.   
“Oh, he’s so little!” Magnus squeaked, bringing both hands to his face, and Even couldn’t help but chuckle. “Can I hold him?”  
“Sure,” the older boy said. Isak sighed as Magnus sat down and picked up the little dog. “Hi!” he said excitedly. “I’m Magnus.”  
Baz padded forward and jumped onto his hind legs, balancing against Magnus's chest and licking at his face.   
Even smiled. “I’ll go make dinner,” he said, backing out of the room.   
Isak was still being moody as he drew his legs into a criss-cross. “Are you having fun?” he asked snarkily.   
Magnus’s smile faltered. “Shit, man,” he said, “are you really upset? I’m sorry, I shouldn’t’ve-”   
“Mags, it’s fine,” Isak sighed. “Serr,” he added when his friend looked unconvinced.   
“It’s just- I know everything I say is pretty stupid, but-”  
“Not everything you say is stupid,” Isak said with no humor at all, a surprised look coming over his face. Magnus swallowed.   
“Yeah. I mean, I know not everything. But, like… most things I say are dumb. I’m not- I don’t think I’m the sharpest tool in the shed or anything, but, like, I don’t want to be hurt anyone just because I’m being stupid.”  
“You’re not the sharpest tool in the shed?” Isak repeated. Magnus’s face got red.   
“Well, yeah- I mean, you know that…”  
“I don’t know shit. What on earth are you talking about?”  
“Well, it’s not like I make great grades, and you guys are always ragging on me for the shit I say, and just like… I’m not that smart, okay? I know that. It doesn’t have to be weird, jeez. I was just trying to apologize if I made you uncomfortable.”   
“Fuck, Mags,” Isak sighed, crawling over to him. “Fuck, we’re pretty shit friends, aren’t we?”  
“Huh? Nei, nei, you guys are the best, I just-”  
“Magnus, you are not stupid. Come on, man. You’re super smart. I mean, maybe you don’t make the best grades but that’s not the only way how to, like, measure somebody’s intelligence, you know? Have you ever heard of EQ?”  
“EQ?” Magnus repeated unsurely.  
“Ja, like, emotional intelligence. It’s super important, people are starting to understand. And you’ve got, like, an EQ off the charts, probably.”  
Magnus stared at him, face scrunched up. “Why would you say that?”  
“I mean, dude, you always make me feel better, you know? No matter how much shit I’m dealing with. You’re super funny and you can always tell when somebody’s upset and you’re so good at making them feel better. And, if it wasn’t for you, I don’t even know if Even and I would be together. I’m really sorry we’ve been making you feel so shitty.”  
“Nei, serr, it ‘s not you guys- I mean, it’s not like you were the first-” Magnus got impossibly redder.   
It wasn’t that nobody had ever told him he was smart. When he was little and he did one of those relatively-simple-but-still-impressive-for-a-kid things, his mom would ooh and ahh and his dad would pin up all hi achievements on the fridge. His third grade teacher said he had a real knack for multiplication one time. But once he got older, and things got harder and he started to fall behind… the praise stopped coming. In fact, it dwindled into criticism. His teachers started writing more and more about his short attention span. Other kids started referring to him more and more as a “dumbass” and an “idiot.” Magnus didn’t really mind- his brother got into Oxford and aced every course he took, so it’s not like his parents were lacking in the successful child department. But once you start believing something about yourself, it just kind of settles there. So being dumb, or at least not smart, was just something he’d accepted about himself. Sometimes it sucked. Sometimes it didn’t matter. But there was never much of a question about whether or not it was true.   
Until now, that is.   
“Mags, you’re really smart.Okay? We’re gonna have to work on getting you to believe that,” Isak said, putting one hand on Magnus back. His friend stared at Baz, petting him softly.   
“Takk,” he whispered after a beat.   
“I made sandwiches!” announced Even, walking in. Isak looked grateful that he’d randomly chosen this moment to return, unaware that Even had been outside the door for the last thirty seconds.   
“Great!” Magnus exclaimed, happy that the attention was being taken off of him. Even passed around the food and then sat on the bed beside Isak, pulling the smaller boy into his side. “Baz is adorable,” Magnus babbled through a full mouth.   
“Don’t say it too loud,” warned Even. “Issy’s afraid that Cardamom will start feeling bad about herself if everyone showers Baz in attention.”  
“I’m just saying she’ll be sad,” Isak defended, petting his kitty mournfully.   
“You coddle her too much,” Even laughed.   
“I do not!”  
“It’s okay, baby, I think it’s sweet.”  
“Shut up,” Isak mumbled, blushing. Even chuckled and pressed kisses onto the side of his head.   
“Why are you so sappy,” grumbled Magnus. He stroked Baz’s soft fur. “How do you deal with them all the time?”  
“Hey,” Isak laughed, punching lightly at Magnus’s shoulder.   
“What? It’s true. He must be traumatized already.”  
Isak laughed again. “You know who’s probably traumatized? Your cat. I can’t imagine what you’ve done to it.”  
“That’s fucked up, man,” Magnus said, but he was smiling.

By the time Magnus had left it was getting pretty late. Isak was tidying up- no, Even, this does not make me a neat freak, I’m just being a considerate human being- while his boyfriend tried pitifully to distract him. “Baaaby,” Even whined into his shoulder, arms looped around his waist.   
“Even, come on,” Isak sighed. Even pulled back at the exhaustion in his voice.   
“Was this afternoon too much?” he asked, brushing away some of Isak’s hair.   
The smaller boy sighed. “Nei, it’s not that.”  
“What is it then?”  
“Just… school. Life. It’s fine.”  
“You know, baby, you can’t set yourself on fire to keep everyone else warm,” Even chastised lightly.   
Isak snorted. “What type of tumblr shit was that?”  
“It’s true,” Even said, pouting slightly. He pressed a kiss to Isak’s forehead. “Now come to bed. You’re tired.”  
Isak let out a sigh that moved through his whole body. “Okay,” he murmured after a moment.   
He let himself be undressed and then pulled on some PJs before snuggling into bed. Even curled around him. “I’ll tell you a story,” the older boy said, and he started on some fantastic tale of a little peasant boy fighting a dragon or something, determined to stay awake until Isak was soundly sleeping. It didn’t take long.   
“Goodnight, my love,” Even whispered.


	54. Chapter fifty-four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Isak is SMART, Even loves it. Smut. Answers to the crucial question of before or after.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am TRASH

Chapter 54  
“Hei!” Isak said excitedly, bouncing into their room. Even looked up from his phone with a suspicious smirk.   
“Hei.”  
Isak literally danced over and that stupid, jittery way of his and pressed a kiss to Even’s mouth, pushing them both back into the bed. When he pulled back, Even was below him and he was resting on his elbows. “Hei,” he giggled again.  
“What’s going on?” Even laughed, pulling him down by the waist and rolling on top of him.   
“Nothing!” Isak protested. Even raised his eyebrows. “Serr! I’m just a very enthusiastic person,” Isak continued, smiling so wide Even considered etching him into stone and setting it up beside all the statues of greek gods.  
“I hate to break it to you, baby, but you’re not,” he replied instead. “Tell me what’s going on.”  
“Nothing,” Isak laughed again, squealing when Even pressed ticklish kisses all over his face.   
“Tell me!” the older boy playfully growled, and Isak huffed and pushed him away.   
“Nei.”  
“Yes.”  
“Nei,” Isak insisted, but he was giggling again because Even had started nipping at him and holding him down when he tried to squirm.   
“Tell me now or I’ll cry,” the older boy warned in his ear. Isak laughed.   
“You’ll cry?”  
“I’ll sob. You’re breaking my heart. I thought you trusted me, baby.”  
Isak let out one last breathy laugh before turning on his phone and holding it out to Even.  
Even took it confusedly. He scanned the screen, and realized it was from Isak’s bio teacher. He’d returned the research paper on virology that Isak had spent literal weeks perfecting. Even had spent the entire time whining about being neglected while also constantly bringing Isak water and snacks and pressing kisses into the back of his neck and massaging the tension in his shoulders.   
So, as soon as Even realized what the email was, his heart sped up. He scanned to the bottom and almost gasped aloud when he saw that Isak had made a perfect score. The only comments his teacher had written were, “Impressive, Mr. Valtersen.”  
“100%?” Even asked, dropping the phone onto the bed. Isak’s smile grew impossibly wider and he laughed. “Fucking Jesus Christ, that’s insane!” Even said, eyes lighting up with admiration for his boy.   
“It’s not that big of a deal,” Isak giggled, although he obviously thought otherwise. Even rolled his eyes and took the bait.   
“Baby, it’s a huge deal! Do you have any idea how hard it is to make a perfect score!? I’ve never made one at all! This paper was giant, I bet you were the only perfect score he’s ever given!”  
Isak flushed and scrunched up his nose, biting down on his smile. “You think?”  
“Oh, baby, I know,” Even assured him. He dipped down and started smattering kisses across his body again. “My smart boy,” he said, and then Isak’s hands were guiding their faces together and they were kissing for real. Isak clung to Even’s neck, forcing the kiss to become deeper. Even chuckled into his mouth.   
“Eager?”  
Pouting, Isak nodded. “I made a 100. I deserve it.”  
“Yeah,” Even sighed fondly. “Yeah, you do.”  
Isak preened. “How fucking smart am I?”  
“So fucking smart. The smartest,” Even agreed, moving in for a second kiss and then a third, and soon they were growing hungrier and messier and Isak was panting and whining for more and Even was giving it to him because his boy deserved fucking everything. 

“Ah, ah, ah,” Isak whimpered, voice going higher, and although Even was being so so gentle and vanilla today he was a goddamn mess underneath him.   
“Are you close, angel?” Even purred against his skin, mouth moving up to suck on his nipple, take it gently between his teeth. Isak’s grip in his hair tightened.   
“Mm-” he replied in lieu of an answer. Even lifted him higher by the arch of his back and went deeper. Isak let out a moan as Even licked up his neck, sucked on his ear.   
“My smart boy, so good and pretty and perfect,” Even cooed into Isak’s jaw, voice strained as he tried to hold out from coming. He wanted to make this good, he wanted this to be good for Isak.   
“Evi,” Isak almost gasped, head falling back further into the pillow. “Please please please.”  
“Yeah? You wanna come?”  
“Please,” Isak sobbed.   
“Okay, sweetheart, okay. Whatever you need.”  
Isak felt himself release, vision going a bit blurry as he clung to Even. Once he was done he was sensitive and sore because if he was honest they’d been fucking a lot lately, but Even was still inside him and he wasn’t moving.   
“Do you wanna blow me?” the older boy whispered in his ear, aware of Isak’s discomfort. Isak nodded once, pushing back some of Even’s hair with a lazy, drunk-in-love smile.   
Even pulled out and Isak crawled on top of him, shimmying down to his hard cock. He smiled almost affectionately at it and gently licked at the head, peppering kisses along down the back vein and onto Even’s balls. The older boy groaned and held onto his hair, tugging in just the way Isak liked.   
“So good for me, baby, so good.”  
Taking a breath, Isak prepared himself before leaning down taking Even into his mouth as deep as he could. Even almost hissed, panting. Isak hollowed out his cheeks, bobbing his head up and down and swirling his tongue. It didn’t take long for Even to shoot off into his mouth, a little harder than he was expecting. The smaller boy choked a little, spitting some of Even’s come back at him before swallowing. He was still coughing when Even came down from the high. The older boy started to laugh.   
“Shut up, I could’ve died,” Isak grumbled, crawling up and curling into Even’s side.   
“You’re so cute,” Even praised, pressing kisses into Isak’s hair. “All flushed and pouty. And did I mention that you’re smart?”  
Isak grinned, eyes still closed. “I think you might’ve said something about it once or twice.”  
Trying to be stealth, Even reached over his soft, cuddly boyfriend and grabbed his phone, opening intsagram, because yes, of course his thumbprint was in Isak’s phone. He grabbed one of Isak’s hands with one of his and used the other to snap a selfie just as Isak opened his eyes with a smile.  
“Nei, Even,” he sighed. “Don’t post that, it’s embarrassing.”  
“Please?” Even asked sweetly, giving Isak puppy eyes.   
Isak blushed and buried his head in the mattress. “I’m telling everyone it was you.”  
Laughing, Even added a caption and posted it, tossing his boy’s phone across the bed.   
“I love you,” he whispered, smoothing back Isak’s only visible eyebrow. Isak’s mouth quirked into a smile but he kept his eyes shut. “Come on,” Even urged, nudging their noses together. “Let me see those beautiful green eyes.”  
Smile growing wider, Isak smushed more of his face into the pillows. Even started peppering feather-light kisses up the back of his neck that turned long and hot with time, coaxing his boy out of his cocoon and into a deeper kiss and then picture Even had posted was both before and after. 

Catfucker and friends (16:02)

Jonas: brooooooo  
Magnus: Ha!!! Omg that’s amazing! I can’t believe you posted that!  
Mahdi: yo that’s sick!   
Mahdi: get it Issy  
Jonas: isak?  
Magnus: isak, isak, isak!  
Mahdi: do you think they’re /busy/ again?  
Magnus: Evennnnn  
Jonas: ha so it was before?  
Magnus: maybe it was both… ;)

Catfucker and friends (18:23)  
Even: Magnus wins!


	55. Chapter fifty-five

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Even gets hurt, Isak is worried af. Noora saves the day, plus Noora is a sad sweet angel. Isak is a Caretaker.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If blood freaks you out, probably don't read!!

Chapter 55  
“Fuck,” Even mumbled, bringing his hand up to his face. He cringed. Blood was running down it, in between his fingers and onto his arm. He’d been washing the dishes when one of their cups shattered and sliced right into him. And it hurt. A lot. “Fuck,” he said again, blinking and trying not to cry. It was just a silly cut. Some of the blood dripped onto the tiles, staining the white a bright red.  
Trying to take deep breaths, he walked to the drawer where they kept things like bandaids and disinfectant? Maybe?  
“Baby, I-” Isak turned the corner- when the fuck had he gotten home- with his bookbag in his hands and a tired look on his face. When he saw Even, blood running to his elbow and sweat dampening his hair- he dropped the bag to the floor. “What the fuck?”  
“Isak, I’m fine, I just-”  
“Shit! Shit, fuck! Oh my god,” Isak sputtered, walking to Even and staring at his hand, covering his mouth with one hand. “What happened?”  
“I broke a glass doing the dishes and-”  
“Oh fuck! Is there glass in there? Even, fuck,” Isak nearly hyperventilated, looking between the wounded hand and Even’s face. “Jesus, where’s my phone? I gotta call the hospital.” He started twisting and turning, patting his pockets. Even laid his good hand on Isak’s shoulder.  
“Baby, it’s okay. You’re not calling the hospital.”  
“But what if you need stitches?!” Isak screeched, blinking rapidly and pushing his hair back with his palm.  
“I don’t. It’s not that deep,” Even assured him. Trying to stop Isak from panicking, he held up his hand and wiggled it around. Turns out that was a bad plan. A sharp pain shot through it and he hissed, closing both eyes and hunching over a little.  
“Fuck, fuck,” Isak repeated. He reached out and smoothed back Even’s hair, pressing a kiss to the top of his head. “You sit down, okay? Take- take this towel-” he grabbed a washcloth off of their counter- “wrap up your hand, and sit down. I’m going to call Noora, okay?”  
“Okay,” Even agreed, walking to the kitchen table and sitting. Isak ran to his backpack and searched around until he found his phone.  
He held it up to his ear and walked to stand beside Even, resting one hand on Even’s non-injured one. “Hei, Noora?” he breathed after a moment. “Could you come over? Even cut himself on glass and I don’t know how to make sure he doesn’t get infected and I don’t know if he needs stitches but he won’t go to the hospital and- okay, okay. Yes. See you soon.”  
Sighing, Isak set down his phone. “How does it feel?” he asked Even, who laughed painfully.  
“Like someone's stabbing my hand.”  
Isak’s eyes got impossibly more worried and he reached out and ran his thumb over Even’s cheek. “I’m so sorry this happened.”  
Even laughed softly through his nose. “It’s not your fault, silly. And I’ll be fine. It’s just a cut.”  
Isak leaned in and pressed soft kisses around Even’s face. He drew in his eyebrows and planted one last kiss on Even’s forehead. “How dare that cup hurt you?”  
Even smiled. “I don’t know. If I were it, I’d be pretty scared to mess with me.”  
Pouting, Isak kissed Even again. “Does it feel any better?”  
“My hand doesn’t, but I do now that you’re here.”  
“Hallo?” Noora’s pretty voice rang. “The door is open?” She walked into the kitchen.  
“I must’ve forgotten to close it,” Isak said, hopping up. “Thank you for coming!”  
“Ja, of course. Hei, Even. Is it really bad?” asked Noora. She looked tired. She’d been at home when Isak had called and so she’d washed off her makeup and pulled her hair into a messy ponytail. She was in a big grey sweater and a pair of black leggings.  
“It’s not that bad,” Even lied. Isak glared at him.  
“He said it feels like somebody’s stabbing his hand over and over.”  
“There’s probably still glass in there,” Noora observed, walking over. She carefully unwrapped the towel from his hand and set it on the table, lifting his hand and checking it over. “Yeah, it looks like that. I brought tweezers just in case.” The blonde girl set down her bag and started to dig through it. After a moment, she took out a small kit and opened it, revealing gauze, disinfectant, tweezers, gauze tape and bandaids. “Isak, can you get a big bowl of warm water?”  
Snapping out of his nervous haze, Isak rushed to the cabinets and grabbed their biggest bowl. “The hot water doesn’t work sometimes,” he said, placing it carefully in the sink and turning on the tap. Luckily, the water was warm. He filled it quickly and brought it back to Noora, who placed Even’s hand inside. Even hissed and squeezed shut his eyes.  
“Oh,” Isak said with pain, grabbing Even’s other hand and holding it tight. “You’re okay. I’ve got you, okay?”  
Even nodded once and tried to smile but tears were pricking at his eyes again.  
“Okay, just let this sit for a while. Isak, is there still glass in the sink?”  
“Um,” Isak did a quick check, “yeah.”  
“Okay. Get some gloves and clean it up. I don’t want you getting hurt, too.”  
Isak nodded and ran out of the room in search of gloves. Even tried to focus on anything but the pain in his hand. Noora was staring at the reddening water with exhaust in her eyes.  
They both snapped out of it a little when Isak returned sporting too-big rubber gloves. Even smiled at him.  
The younger boy walked to the sink and started taking out the big pieces of glass, placing them in a trash bag he’d grabbed. “Okay, I’m gonna take your hand out now, okay?” Noora asked. Even nodded once. She carefully lifted out his hand and very, very gently patted it dry with the towel they’d been using. The cut was much clearer without so much blood. Even could see a shiny shard of glass stuck within it. Noora examined it. “Isak?” she called.  
“Ja?” Isak replied, at their side in an instant.  
“I’m gonna get the glass out. I need you to make sure he doesn’t flinch too hard, okay? Or else it could get turned and get stuck in there.”  
“Is it gonna hurt?!” Isak asked, alarm breaking over his face.  
“Yeah, but it’ll feel a lot better right after.” Noora looked up at Even. “Are you ready?”  
He nodded once. Isak knelt to the ground and took his good hand, forcing Even to look at him. He pressed a kiss into the back of his palm. “You’re gonna be okay, baby. Just breathe in and out. Count to ten with me, yeah?”  
Even smiled, despite everything. “Yeah.”  
They started counting up as Noora eased the tweezers into the cut and clamped them down on the glass. Even winced hard and a tear leaked onto his cheek as he bit the inside of his cheek.  
“I’m sorry, sweetheart,” Isak said, looking near tears himself. He wiped Even’s cheek and kept counting. Even shut his eyes as Noora slowly extracted the glass. Once it was all the way out, however, a look of relief broke over his face and he let out a soft gasp. Isak smiled and gave a trembly sigh. “Feel better?”  
“Yeah,” Even laughed. Noora dropped the glass onto the table, where it landed with a clink. It was red with Even’s blood but now his hand just felt cut up, not like there was… well, a piece of glass stabbing him.  
“You won’t need stitches,” the girl told him. “It’s not too deep.”  
“Are you sure? I could take him to the ER, just let me get my-” Isak started. Noora took his hand.  
“I’m sure. Just let me get him bandaged up. Why don’t you clean up all the blood?”  
Isak nodded once and walked away to find another towel. Noora focused on drying Even’s hand more thoroughly before ripping open a sterile pad and dampening it with disinfectant. She dabbed it over the cut and it bubbled, making Even flinch and involuntarily attempt to pull his hand back. “Stay still,” Noora said, but not meanly. Once she was done, she wrapped him up with a good foot of gauze, applied very professionally and tight. She then taped it down with the gauze tape. “How do you feel?” she asked.  
“A lot better. Thank you, Noora,” Even replied earnestly, trying to catch her eye, but she was staring almost vacantly down at his bandaged hand.  
In a moment that Even barely had time to process, her eyes glazed over with tears. She blinked and the tears fell onto her smooth cheeks. She didn’t open her eyes again.  
“Hey,” Even whispered, unsure what to do. “I- are you okay?”  
Noora nodded silently, letting a tremble out through her nose. At that moment, Isak walked back in. “I got the- oh.”  
He lowered the towel to his side. Noora had finally opened her eyes and she looked at him. Isak gaped back.  
Standing, she walked slowly to him and rested her head on his shoulder, crossing her arms over her chest. Isak encircled her back with his arms, holding her tight. It was silent except for Noora’s occasionaly sniffles and shaky breaths. After a long while, she whispered something in Isak’s ear. Even could barely make it out but he understood. “He’s not coming back.”  
“I’m so sorry, Noora,” Isak sighed. “It’ll be okay.”  
Her breathing became slightly more erratic. “I’m- I’m just tired.”  
“I know.”  
Even watched all of this from his chair. He eventually stood and walked behind them, placing one hand on Noora’s back. She peeked up at him, face red and blotchy, before, tugging him into their hug. There was a long time during which nobody spoke. Eventually, Noora, stepped away. “Sorry,” she laughed sadly, wiping at her eyes.  
“It’s fine,” Isak said instantly, shaking his head. “Do you want to stay for a while?”  
Noora smiled at him. “Nei,” she breathed. “Eskild will probably have wine for dinner if I don’t go home, so…” she laughed again, voice high pitched. Isak frowned at her.  
“Do you want me to take you back?”  
Noora grabbed her bag and slowly put on her shoes. “I’ll be fine,” she assured him. “Takk. Even, make sure you change those every few hours, okay?”  
Even nodded. “Thank you for everything. Come back soon, Noora,” he said, and the blonde girl nodded before heading out, leaving the two boys alone. Isak stared after her before turning to Even.  
“How do you feel?” he asked. Even smiled down at him.  
“Better. It still hurts, though.”  
Frowning, Isak popped on his toes to give Even yet another forehead kiss. “I’m sorry, sweetie. Go sit while I clean this up, then I’ll make dinner and we can watch a movie. I’ll even feed you.”  
“You don’t have to do all that,” Even laughed. “I can help. I’m not disabled.”  
Pouting, Isak turned him around and gently pushed him towards the living room. “Go sit. You are officially out of commision, which means I get to take care of you.”  
“Out of commision?”  
“Yes! Now go!”  
Resigning, Even threw his hands up- ow, fuck, he’d have to be careful about that- and walked into the living room. He turned on the TV and smiled, listening to the sounds of Isak cleaning and then pots clanging as he made them dinner.  
After a while, the younger boy walked out with two bowls of soup. “Homemade?” asked Even, and Isak nodded proudly. Despite expectation, Isak wasn’t half bad in the kitchen. He was very by the book- never experimenting or adding something extra for flavor- but that only meant his meals were precise and usually very well prepared. As soon as he set down the bowls, he rushed back into the kitchen and came out with two plastic cups of water. Then he ran away a third time and came back with Cardamom over his shoulder and Baz in his arms. “I thought they’d make you feel better,” he said, setting their pets down on the couch beside Even. Then he sat down and picked up one of the bowls, getting a spoonful of soup and holding it up to Even’s mouth.  
“Baby,” Even chuckled, “I can feed myself.”  
“Let me take care of you,” Isak whined, frowning. Even laughed again and let himself be fed.  
After they were done eating and Isak had changed Even’s bandages- “Noora said every few hours, Issy, not every hour,”- the two boys crawled into bed. Suddenly, a look of alarm crossed Even’s face. “Didn’t you have homework?” he asked.  
Isak leaned forward and kissed him. “Nothing important,” he whispered.  
Even smiled affectionately. “Why are you so good at taking care of people?” he asked.  
“I have a pretty great boyfriend who taught me how,” Isak said, scrunching up his nose. Even smiled again, with his whole face, and draped one leg over Isak’s, tucking his face into the smaller boy’s chest.  
“I love you. Especially now that I know what an awesome caretaker you’ll be when I’m old and senile.”  
Isak smiled. “I love you, too. And you’re right. I’ll take care of you forever.”  
“In infinite universes?” Even asked, breath warm against Isak’s chest. The smaller boy played with his hair.  
“In every universe.”


	56. Chapter fifty-six

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The boys both have a bad day, they have a little argument, things are okay in the end:)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay. So the Friday clip... hurt. This chapter is a little angsty, with a little fighting by request, but it mostly has a sad vibe because I have been saddened. If I had to describe the chapter I'd say it's very blue, electric blue at the beginning and midnight blue at the end. Everyone has their days. I promise it's really soft at the end, soft but kind of heavy. Please, please take note of all the wonderful lessons this show has taught us because they are so important. If ever you guys need help or feel trapped, you can reach out to me here: http://ebox-gimme-the-beat.tumblr.com/   
> Alt er love<3

Chapter 56  
Even stared down at his desk. The teacher was saying something but he’d lost interest. He’d woken up on the wrong side of the bed.   
Isak was already out, since Even’s first class wasn’t until ten and he’d slept in. Usually Even woke up while Isak was getting ready and got to have a few morning cuddles and bunny kisses before dozing back off. But, this time, he woke up with the alarm at 8:30 and Isak’s side of the bed wasn’t even warm anymore.   
So that had sucked. And then he’d almost been late because he’d gotten distracted on the tram and missed his stop, which gave him no time to stop and grab coffee. He’d been immediately bombarded by the promise of an upcoming exam upon entering class and his peers were asking questions about things he’d never heard of, and then they’d gotten a test back that he had… not done great on. And then his stupid hand made it impossible to do anything. Now he was in his second class of the day and he was annoyed, yeah, but he was mostly just down.   
“Hey, you okay?” his friend, Alex, asked. Even smiled and nodded once. He tried to focus on other things, like how he’d get to see Isak later and maybe they’d go out for a walk or something. His phone lit up on the desk in front of him and he quickly put in in his lap, opening the message from May. 

May: Hey you seemed a little off in class today? Everything okay? Are you in a low?

Even frowned. He hated this. Why wasn’t he allowed to have a bad day or be in a bad mood without everyone blaming that fact that he’s bipolar? Is he manic everytime he gets happy and depressed everytime he’s sad? He started to regret even telling May that he was bipolar. He’d only done it because when he’d missed some classes she’d been worried and he felt like he could trust her. Not that he couldn’t trust her all over a stupid check-up text, but… it was just frustrating. 

Even: I’m fine. Just in a bad mood.  
May: Okay! I’m here if you wanna talk  
May: even though I know you have a great boyfriend for that hahahahahaha  
Even: takk:)

Turning off his phone, Even tried to pay attention to class, but he was feeling increasingly miserable. 

Isak, as it turns out, was not having the best day either. He’d slept passed his alarm and ended up forgetting his gym clothes, which of course inspired his gym coach to go on a 20 minute rant about the importance of being prepared. He’d scored well on his maths test but then the teacher had asked him to explain all his methods in front of the whole class because he had no idea what privacy was, which led to two of his least favorite classmates coming up to him after lunch and asking him “Is your boyfriend just as big a nerd, too? Do you guys talk maths when you suck each other off?”  
He’d walked away and found Jonas, who took in his annoyance and asked if he wanted to go for Kebabs after school, and Isak wanted so badly to say yes but he had a stupid, stupid Norwegian paper due that he had to work on. So he went home right after school and started working on it, but he kept replaying his day in his head, thinking about all the ways it could’ve gone differently.   
He was stewing over his laptop when Even walked in. “Halla,” he called, voice tired. Isak didn’t look up.   
“Hei.”  
“How was your day?” the older boy asked, sitting down across from Isak.   
“Crappy.”  
“What happened?” Even sighed. He’d been looking forward to coming home to a smiley Isak who could help him feel better.   
“Just everything. Slept late, forgot my gym stuff, and these idiots… were calling me a nerd and… just everything.”  
“I’m sorry, angel,” Even said, reaching across the table to rest on hand Isak’s, who still hadn’t looked up from the screen.   
“And now I have this stupid paper due and I just- I’m just stressed.”  
Even ran his thumb over Isak’s knuckles. “That sucks,” he said softly. Isak let out an annoyed huff and continued typing.   
“Ja, it does.”  
Even frowned a little. He got that Is had had a bad day but he was tired and sad and he didn’t want to deal with a crabby boyfriend, too. “I’m sure it’ll get better, though. You’ll probably ace this paper.”  
“Easy for you to say. You were good at Norwegian,” Isak said irritably. Even’s frown deepened.   
“You’re good at every subject.”  
“Only because I work hard.”  
“Are you saying I didn’t work hard?” Even asked softly, thinking of how hard he’d work on the project he’d just gotten back.   
“No,” Isak amended, finally glancing up. “I just… it’s just different.”  
“Why is it different? You think I don’t feel the same when you do effortlessly well in science and maths?”  
“It’s not effortless.”  
“Exactly.”  
Isak’s shoulders tightened. “Whatever. Sorry. I know you work hard.”  
Nodding once, Even stood. “It’s fine.” He started looking around in the fridge. “Don’t we have beer?”  
“Weren’t you going to get some?” Isak asked back, looking up and raising his eyebrows.   
“Shit,” Even sighed. “I forgot.”  
“Serr? Even, you said you’d go shopping. What are we supposed to eat for dinner now?”  
“I’m sorry, okay? It was a long day and-”  
“Ja, well, it was a long day for me, too, but I managed to do everything I said I’d do.”  
Even stared at Isak. His throat hurt because he hadn’t been drinking enough water lately. “What do you want me to do, Is? I forgot. I’m sorry.”  
“Whatever. It’s fine,” Isak said, typing with a little more force than before.   
“Why do you always have to say whatever when you’re in a mood?” Even asked with exasperation. Isak looked up incredulously.   
“Excuse me? You’re the one who fucking forgot to get groceries. What are we supposed to do now? Are we going out to eat? No matter what we’re doing, don’t snap at me for being annoyed with you.”  
“Haven’t you considered that maybe my day wasn’t so great, either?” Even asked.   
Isak stared at him gap mouthed, waiting for him to continue, before sputtering, “Well? Was it?”  
“That’s not the point,”  
“Then what is the point?!”  
Even took a deep breath. He felt like crying, like telling Isak how shit today had actually been, but he was upset with the smaller boy, too, and he was just really tired. “I’m sorry about the groceries,” he breathed after a beat. “You can go out if you want. I’m going to go lie down.”

Laying in bed, Even stroked the top of Baz’s head. The little dog was asleep on his stomach and he was snoring lightly. Even was staring up at the ceiling. He’d heard Isak stomping around before eventually heading out to get food somewhere, or so Even assumed. Reaching across the mattress, he grabbed his phone and checked for messages. 

Isak The Man Of My Dreams Valtersen: hi  
Isak The Man Of My Dreams Valtersen: I’m at macca’s  
Isak The Man Of My Dreams Valtersen: want something?

Sighing, Even rested his head on the pillow again and exited the conversation. He scrolled through his contacts, looking for somebody to talk to, just really talk to, but…   
Jonas and the boys were his friends, sure, but he felt weird venting about Isak to them. He knew they’d always choose Isak over him, which was normal and understandable, but it didn’t make them a great support system in moments like these. Then there was his parents, but he wasn’t about to go crying to them with his boyfriend problems, although they were great. He even considered texting Sana but he didn’t want to put her down or anything, and they weren’t close enough where he felt absolutely comfortable talking to her about his daily struggles. His friends from school were too new.   
He thought about Mikeal. He wasn’t even considering texting him but he thought about how nice it would’ve been to have him to talk to. Even shut his eyes. Maybe Yousef would reply, he thought. But what would he even say to this boy he hadn’t spoken to in a year? Hi, my boyfriend Isak (oh, by the way, Sonja and I broke up and I’m dating a boy now) just had a fight because he had a bad day and so did I and I forgot to get groceries (yes, we live together) and I’m really drained and I just want somebody to talk to?  
The thought made him smile but the smile hurt. He shouldn’t be thinking about them.   
It was just- Mikeal had seemed so concerned. He didn’t even seem that angry. It was like he truly believed he was helping Even, not doing the exact opposite. He’d been trying to help and then Even- Even had-   
Which was why he just couldn’t do it anymore. Felt like he couldn’t live with himself.   
Come on, he thought. Stop mulling. It’s better now.  
Baz woke up suddenly, and hopped off of Even’s stomach to curl into his side. The older boy rolled over to surround him and petted him until they both dozed off again. 

When Even woke up, it was because the bed had jostled. He looked up to see Isak sitting at the foot of it, head low between his shoulders. Baz had disappeared. “Hei,” the younger boy sighed, voice course.  
“Hei,” Even breathed back.  
“I got you food.”  
“Takk.”  
“I’m sorry,” Isak said, letting out a long breath. Even frowned.   
“It’s okay.”  
“Nei, I shouldn’t have been snappish and rude just because I had a bad day. I’m sorry.”  
“Come here,” Even said, and Isak looked over his shoulder at the older boy before crawling over and laying beside him so that their faces were even and they were about an inch away from touching.   
“Are you okay?” Isak asked, reaching forward tentatively to push some of Even’s hair out of his face. “You said you were having a bad day, too.”  
Even tried to keep it in but he couldn’t help when he felt his eyes glaze over. “I’m just tired,” he whispered, shutting them. “I’m so, so tired, Isak. Why can’t I feel bad for one day without the world assuming I’m having a fucking episode?”  
He heard Isak shuffle and then he was being pulled against the younger boy’s chest. “Oh, baby,” Isak murmured, holding him tight. Even sniffled. “I’m so sorry. Why does everything have to be so hard for you? It isn’t fair. You don’t deserve any of it. Especially not coming home to me being a dick on top of the rest.”  
Even sighed. “It’s not your fault. You couldn’t’ve known.”  
“Still, though. I’m sorry.” There was quiet. “Do you wanna talk about what happened?”  
“I just… I don’t understand my class and we’re having a test soon, and I did badly on that project I was working on, so I was upset, and then May asked if I was depressed and I just… I know she just cares, but I’m so tired, Is.”  
Isak took deep, full breaths and Even calmed at the way they felt against him. “I’m sorry. I wish I could take it all away.”  
Even smiled softly. “It shouldn’t be such a big deal,” he said, voice wavering.   
“Of course it should be,” Isak said back. “It should be exactly whatever it is, okay?”  
“Okay,” Even agreed. A silence stretched by.   
“Should we eat?” Isak asked eventually. Even curled deeper into him.   
“I’m tired, Is,” he repeated.   
Isak stroked his back gently. “Then let’s just lay here for now.”

The minutes came and went, turned to hours. Sometimes, they layed facing each other, and there were soft, quiet smiles. Sometimes, Even rolled over and pulled Isak’s arm around his waist, and the smaller boy smushed his nose into Even’s back. Other times, he nuzzled into Even’s chest. People had probably texted them about parties as it was a Friday night but neither boy cared. The sun disappeared, filling their room with hazy blue light, and eventually Even fell asleep. When he woke up, Isak was had dozed off, too. Half an hour later, they were whispering simple nothings to each other and letting out gentle laughter. Isak brought the food in after a long time and they ate in bed, discarding their garbage into the tiny trash bin they’d shoved behind the dresser. Both boys stripped down to their boxers and crawled back under the covers. Minutes passed where they laid forehead to forehead, searching each other’s eyes.   
“I’m sorry,” Even whispered.   
Isak shook his head ever so slightly. “Nei,” he breathed. He nudged their noses together. “Tomorrow, the sun’s gonna rise. And then we’ll try again.”  
Even nodded once. A few more moments passed before he shut his eyes, and, at last, some of his exhaust seemed to drain.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been in love with Eva and Jonas's breakup scene for over a year, hence the homage. Love you all<3


	57. Chapter fifty-seven

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eskild visits, he, Jonas and Evak go out for breakfast, Isak's dad texts

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, this might be highkey boring lol, but I'm bored and I was thinking about it somehow getting back to Even that Elias was wasted on Friday afternoon(?) and crashed at the Kollectiv, soo

Chapter 57  
When they woke up, both boys felt lighter. “Hei,” Even whispered, reaching out to stroke Isak’s cheek when the younger boy squinted open one eye.   
“Hei.”  
Snuggling a little closer, the older boy tugged Isak into his arms. “What do you want to do?”  
Isak hummed against his chest. “I don’t know.”  
“Would you mind if we just stayed here for a while?”  
“Nei,” Isak whispered. “I wouldn’t mind at all.”  
They laid flush against each other, Even resting one hand on the side of Isak’s head. “I’m glad you’re here,” the older boy whispered.   
“Where else would I be?” mumbled Isak, eyes shut.   
Even pulled him a little closer. “I don’t know. But I still can’t believe you chose me sometimes.”  
“I didn’t choose you, Even,” whispered Isak, snaking his arm around Even’s waist. “It wasn’t a choice. It was just you. It’s always been you.”  
Even smiled, although Isak couldn’t see it.   
When one of their phones started ringing, both boys jumped. Isak squirmed around and grabbed at the bedside table. He checked his phone and made an adorable little huff. Even’s mouth quirked up. “Who is it?” he asked.   
“Eskild.” He sighed again before accepting the call. “Hei, Eskild.”  
There was silence. Even stared happily at his boy as Isak rolled his eyes throughout the conversation. “Huh?! Eskild it’s,” he pulled the phone away from his face and checked the time, “it’s only nine in the morning… ja, I’m aware. No, I’m not hungover… nei, nei Eskild, nei, that was not permission-” there was silence and Isak sighed, throwing the phone down. “Guess who’s coming over,” he said to Even, snuggling back into him.   
“We should get up, then.”  
“Nei,” Isak whined. Even rubbed his arm.  
“Don’t you think Eskild will be a little annoyed if he comes all this way just to find us still in bed?”  
“I don’t give a fuck,” Isak groaned, trying to hide from the world by disappearing further into the blanket.   
“Come on, baby,” Even whispered, nosing at Isak. “Come on out.” The older boy could feel Isak’s face quirk upwards but he stayed hidden. “Where’d you go?” asked Even, smiling wider now. “Did you go down with the moon, baby boy?”  
Even just adored the flush that climbed Isak’s cheeks. “Shut up,” he mumbled.   
Ignoring his request, Even buried his face in Isak’s hair. “So soft,” he sighed. “How do you make it so soft, Issy?”  
Finally, Isak peaked out and looked up at Even, eyes hazy with sleep. “You make me soft.”  
Smiling his eyes into slits, Even pressed a gentle kiss to his forehead. “You’re sleepy today,” he observed.   
“It’s too early to be awake, anyway.”  
“Should we get up? Eskild will be here soon.”   
Isak nodded once. “Chill?”  
“That’s chill.”

When Eskild finally arrived, the boys were on the couch. A soft music was playing, filling the air with gentle sound. Isak was half asleep on Even’s shoulder as Even whispered nothing into his ear. He smiled dopily at the older boy.  
“Hallo? Am I interrupting?” asked Eskild, swinging the door open using his spare key.   
“Hei!” Even exclaimed happily, and Isak cast the attention of his smile onto his guru.   
“So what are we gonna do, babies? Since we’re having such a fun visit?”  
“Ja, and what exactly is the reason of this visit?” asked Isak. Eskild frowned.   
“I can’t visit my boys for no reason?” Isak stared at him, eyebrows raised, until Eskild continued, “Ja, okay, I was in the neighborhood and-”  
“You’re always in the neighborhood, we live in the same neighborhood, Eskild.”  
“AND I wanted to stop by to say hello to my favorite boys! It’s been so long! I’m being deprived.”  
“You’re not being deprived, Eskild, we saw you two days ago.”  
“Stop being rude, Isak,” Eskild pouted. Isak rolled his eyes fondly.   
“Wanna sit down?” he asked.   
“Ja!” Eskild bubbled, bouncing over to the couch and snuggling into their little ball. Isak squirmed.   
“So how are you? Everything still going great?”  
“Of course,” smiled Even, rubbing up and down Isak’s arm and smattering kisses on his cheek, making the smaller boy smile and blush.   
“Can I finally meet that new puppy of yours?” Eskild asked.   
“Oh, right! You still haven’t met! Here, um, he’s probably in the bedroom,” Even started to get up, but Isak whined in the back of his throat and clung to him.   
Eskild rolled his eyes. “Jesus, Isak, you’d think having Even all to yourself all the time would make you less needy.”  
Huffing, Isak curled up into Even’s side, burying his face in the crook of the older boy’s neck. Even smiled and held him tight. “Baz is on the bed, you can go grab him.”  
Eskild popped up and walked towards the bedroom. Even pressed a kiss into the top of Isak’s soft head. “Why are you so clingy today?” he asked.   
Letting out a soft breath through his nose, Isak shrugged slightly. “It’s Saturday, we haven’t had chill time all week,” he said.   
“Aw, you missed me,” Even cooed, making Isak pout.   
“Shut up,” he whispered, pulling away and resting his forehead on Even’s. He pressed a gentle kiss to the older boy’s mouth, softly moving so he could sit on top of Even’s lap. He smiled into the kiss and pulled them closer against each other. He opened his mouth, running his tongue over Even’s lower lip, and smiling when the older boy parted his mouth willingly.   
“I was gone for two seconds, oh my god,” Eskild said as he walked back in with Baz in his arms. “He is adorable, by the way,” he said, nosing at the little dog.   
Isak pulled off of Even and flopped back onto the couch, leaving his legs across the older boy’s thighs. Even rolled his eyes and started playing with the cuff of Isak’s sweatpants. “He is, isn’t he?” he asked. Eskild nodding.   
“What a little fluffer! Do he and Cardamom get along?”  
“Oh please, he’s obsessed with her. He follows her everywhere. And she puts up with him, too. She acts annoyed but I think she loves him,” Even said, mock whispering.   
Isak took out his phone and started playing a game while the other boys talked about the pets.   
“What’s the plan for you guys today?” asked Eskild.   
“I don’t know,” Even said. “We’ll probably end up going out. We were total shut ins yesterday, so.”  
“Um, ja!? Noora texted a hundred times to see if you wanted to hang out! We had a real cutie over, too.”  
“Hot date?” asked Even.   
“Ugh, I wish,” Eskild groaned. “Sana’s brother got hammered and needed a place to stay so his parents wouldn’t kill him, so Noora and Sana brought him to ours. It was quite exciting.”  
Isak kept playing his game, but he eyed Even carefully. The older boy seemed to have no reaction to the mention of Sana’s brother- Mikeal’s friend?- and only smiled back at Eskild.   
“Sounds interesting,” he commented. “Was he okay?”  
“He was fine. Literally,” Eskild smiled at his own joke.  
“Do want breakfast or something? We haven’t eaten,” Even said, also smiling. Isak narrowed his eyes but didn’t say anything. Even will tell you if he’s ready, he thought for what felt like the millionth time.  
“Sure,” Eskild agreed, hopping up. “What do you guys have?”  
“Not much,” Even laughed. “I forgot to get groceries.” He flashed a smile to Isak, who scrunched his nose and rolled his eyes.   
“We could go out,” Eskild suggested. Even nodded.   
“Let us just get dressed,” he said, dragging Isak up with him. The smaller boy huffed and followed him into the bedroom.   
As he was getting ready, his phone lit up. 

Jonas: Hei, plans for today?  
Isak: Going for breakfast with Eskild. Wanna join?  
Jonas: Now?  
Isak: yeah  
Jonas: okay, where?  
Isak: idk, just come here first  
Jonas: okay  
Jonas: see you in five

“It’s okay that Jonas joins, right?” Isak asked. Even yanked a shirt over his head before smiling.   
“Of course.”  
“Cool.”

By the time Jonas arrived and everyone was ready to go, Eskild and launched into the story of this crazy night he’d had at the club last weekend. Even was listening attentively while Jonas and Isak hung behind.   
“Are you psyched for school tomorrow?” Jonas asked sarcastically. Isak scoffed.   
“Ja, totally. You know, every year I think it’ll be less of a hassle to get out of bed before school, and every year I’m wrong.”  
“Well, you are lazy,” Jonas commented, making Isak stop in his tracks and raise one hand to his chest.   
“Me? I’m lazy?”  
“Ja?”  
“I’m the least lazy person, what the fuck?”  
“Isak, you get up at like noon everyday.”  
“I do not! Only if I don’t sleep well. And I’m now, aren’t I?”  
“Because of Even.”  
Huffing again, Isak dropped his jaw. “Are you saying I’m only not lazy with Even?”  
Jonas grinned. “Yes. That’s exactly what I’m saying.”  
“Fuck you, man,” Isak laughed, pushing at him. Jonas swatted his arm and they ended up in a shoving match. Even and Eskild stopped from ahead of them and smirked.  
“God, they really are children, aren’t they?” asked Eskild. Even laughed. Eventually, Jonas got Isak in a headlock.   
“Fine, you win, you win,” Isak resigned, pushing him away.   
Jonas laughed. “In your face.”  
“Fuck you.”

They ended up spending the rest of the day messing around with Jonas, after Eskild left. The three of them went around town getting into random situations. Even loved seeing Isak so carefree, especially with one of the only people he felt genuinely at ease around. He loved seeing the goofy side of Jonas, too, because he was usually serious when a lot of people were around. At one point, Even started taking pictures of them as they posed. Jonas bent over while Isak rested his elbows on the dark-haired boy’s back and held a wild flower between his teeth, raising one eyebrow seductively. “Beautiful!” Even shouted, snapping away.   
They continued their adventure until Jonas had to head home, and then the boys finally went grocery shopping.   
Once they got back to their apartment- with about five products they didn’t need, but Isak couldn’t say no to Even’s puppy eyes- they were both kind of tired. Even made dinner while Isak helped- actually helped, unlike at the beginning- and then they ate while watching a movie. At the end, the boys were sleepy. “Let’s go to bed,” Even said, dragging Isak behind him. They snuggled up under the blankets and slowly drifted off. 

The next morning, Isak woke to an message from his dad. 

Pappa: Hi, Isak. Would you call me? I have news. 

Sighing, Isak rubbed his eyes before responding, “Even is asleep. Can you just text?”

Pappa: It’s a bit of a big deal.   
Isak: It’s fine, just text please.   
Pappa: Okay  
Pappa: Isak, Nina and I are getting married.


	58. Chapter fifty-eight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ummm idk, mostly some (?able) kids in Isak's class need tutoring? A

Chapter 58  
Pappa: Isak, Nina and I are getting married. 

Isak stared at his phone, trying to figure out what he was supposed to feel. Maybe he should be happy for his dad? But, then again, wouldn’t his friends and stuff expect him to be mad? Or indifferent?  
Part of him was sad. He always knew that his parents weren’t going to magically end up together, nor did he even think it would be good for his mother to be with his father, but there was still a little boy in him who just wanted mama and pappa to love each other again.  
But then, another part of him was just frustrated. Why did his dad even get to get married and be happy when all he’d ever done was ruined things?  
“Hey,” Even croaked. Isak jumped, unaware that he’d woken up.  
“Hei,” he whispered, laying down down and pressing a soft kiss to Even’s mouth. The older boy frowned from his cocoon.  
“What were you looking at? You seem upset.”  
Isak smiled thinly. “My dad texted me.”  
Frown deepening, Even scooted a little bit upwards. “What about?”  
“I- he and Nina, his girlfriend… they’re getting married.”  
Even raised his eyebrows. “Oh.”  
“Ja.”  
“So… are you upset?”  
“Um,” Isak swallowed. “I don’t know. I don’t think so. I mean, it hasn’t really hit me yet, I guess. I mean, why should I even care, though?”  
Pushing back some of Isak’s curls, Even cocked his head. “He’s your dad.”  
“Yeah, but… I guess.”  
“Did he say anything else?” Even asked.  
“No. I haven’t replied.”  
“What are you gonna say?”  
“I don’t know.” Isak rolled over and grabbed his phone again. He smiled softly when Even pulled him into a spoon, tucking his head on top, and watched him type. 

Isak: Oh. Congratulations. When? 

“Safe?” he checked before sending it. Even nodded. 

Pappa: We haven’t set the date, but sometime next year. But Isak… I feel really horrible about the things went down between us. I was wondering if you and Even would like to get lunch sometime with Nina and me? Or just with me? If either of you are uncomfortable, I would understand. But I would love it if we could begin to rebuild our relationship. 

Isak felt Even press a soft kiss to the back of his neck. “Don’t say yes if you don’t want to, baby,” he whispered.  
Isak was torn. He scooched around to face Even. “How could I forgive him? He called you crazy and he left mama and-”  
“Why don’t you work on forgiving him for everything he did to you, angel?” Even asked, concern etching his face. Isak blanked.  
“I- he- he didn’t do anything to me that I couldn’t forgive him for.”  
Sighing, Even shut his eyes. “Baby, he hurt you so much. He nearly killed you.”  
“He did not.”  
“He left you alone, at fifteen, with your mentally unstable mother, which drove you to a breaking point at which you literally went out, underage, and got too drunk to stand, inspiring a total stranger to take you home. Do you know how lucky you are that it was Eskild who found you? Do you know how often I think about what could have happened?” His grip around Isak grew tighter. “You could’ve- it could’ve been so bad. And to think that he, your father, is the one who destroyed your home and your life to the point where you had nowhere else to go? And that’s just one of a million things. How could you forgive him?”  
“I just- he didn’t mean-”  
“Who cares what he meant?” Seeing Isak’s sad eyes, Even softened slightly. “If you think you can put these things in your past, then I’m happy. I don’t want you to be bitter. But if you can’t… that’s okay. You don’t have to feel obligated to do anything.”  
“I don’t think I can forgive him,” Isak sighed, pressing his face into Even’s chest. “At least not yet. But I think I should try to move on, right? If he’s trying to fix things, maybe I should at least hear him out?”  
“Yeah,” Even nodded. “If that’s what you want.”  
“Will you come?” Isak’s voice nearly broke. Even pulled them closer together and pressed kisses into his head, desperate to convince this silly, silly boy that he’d follow him to the ends of the earth.  
“Of course.”  
Sighing, Isak pulled out his phone.

Isak: Okay. I think we could meet next weekend, if you’re free.  
Pappa: That would work. I’m excited to see you boys.  
Isak: Yeah.

Rolling back over, Isak pressed his face into Even’s chest. “Are you nervous?”  
“Let’s talk about it later.”  
Even rubbed his back. “Okay.”

The next day, Isak was at lunch, waiting for Jonas and the others. They were all in the same class before lunch- which annoyed the fuck out of Isak- and they’d had a test, so Isak knew they were going to be late. When the table clattered in front of him, he looked up in confusion.  
“Hei,” said Oskar, one of the boys in his maths class. Ugh. Isak really did not feel like dealing with this dickhead right now. He’d been one of the ones backing up Markus at that party before school had started.  
“Hei.”  
“I was wondering if you could help me study for maths,” Oskar continued, biting into his sandwich. Isak narrowed his eyes.  
“Um… I don’t know. I’m pretty busy.”  
“With your boyfriend?”  
Isak looked down, drawing in his eyebrows. “With school,” he said after a beat.  
“I heard you guys live together?” Oskar smiled. He about Isak’s height, but he was thick. “That’s sick, man,” he laughed, but it wasn’t in the way Mahdi or Magnus would say it.  
“I- what do you even want?” Isak asked, frowning.  
“I told you,” said Oskar, swallowing his food. “I want help in maths.”  
“Bro, what’s up?” Emil, who was also in their class, came up behind Oskar and nudged his back. He eyed Isak suspiciously.  
“Nothing. Just getting maths help from the class genius,” Oskar said, standing. Isak licked his lips and tried not glare. Emil smiled meanly.  
“You’re Isak, right? You’re the one who screwed over Emma last year.”  
Isak shut his eyes for a second. Why oh why did that have to keep coming up.  
“That was a pretty dick thing to do, man. But I get it. It’s hard to come out. You would’ve been a waste with a girl, though. With that ass,” continued Emil. Flushing, Isak glanced away. Oskar snorted.  
“That’s fucked up,” he said, standing with his tray. “But, anyway, Isak, I got your number from your friend Elias, so I’ll be texting you then, yeah?”  
This threw Isak off even more, and he hadn’t replied in a while, anyway, so he just shrugged. The two boys walked off, and Isak could only watch them. When Magnus gently touched his back, he jumped.  
“What’s up with that?” asked the blond, nodding towards the boys. Isak was quiet before shrugging.  
“They wanted me to help them study for maths.”  
“Oh. Cool. Um, did you see the new game that got released? It looks pretty sick. We gotta find somebody who owns it…”  
Isak stopped listening when his phone buzzed in his pocket. 

(12:05) Unknown: right #? this is Oskar

Isak didn’t know whether or not to reply but he figured it would rude to just completely ignore the kid, especially since he hadn’t actually done anything besides rub Isak the wrong way. 

Isak: Right number  
Oskar: great

By the time the other boys showed up, Isak wasn’t hungry. 

(16:23) Oskar: so when can we meet

(17:19) Oskar: its rude not to respond isak

(17:45) Isak: Sorry. Was busy. I don’t know, like I told you, I’m pretty busy  
Oskar: im sure you can make time between sucking cock

(18:01) Oskar: kidding, kidding. Lighten up. 

(19:33) Oskar: seriously. Sorry man. But i need a tutor, can you please help?

 

(19:51) Isak: Yes, fine.  
Oskar: great. When can we meet?  
Isak: When are you free  
Oskar: after school anytime this week  
Isak: okay, wednesday?  
Oskar: sounds good  
Isak: okay

“Who are you texting?”  
Isak nearly jumped a foot as Even snaked his arms around his waist and pressed a warm kiss to his neck. “Huh? Oh, um, nobody. Just a kid in my maths. He needs a tutor.”  
“Oh. And you’re gonna help him?”  
“Ja, I guess.”  
“You don’t seem too excited, love,” Even laughed softly, pulling Isak into bed with him.  
“It’ll be boring,” Isak sighed, tossing the phone aside and tugging Even onto his chest so he could play with his hair. “I don’t even like maths.”  
“Maybe you’ll both learn something, then,” Even replied, peaking up. Isak snorted and pushed his face away.  
“You’re such a nerd?”  
“I’m trying to be helpful,” Even pouted. He flopped over so that his whole body was on top of Isak’s before pushing up and pinning the smaller boy by his arms. “What do you have to say now?”  
Isak rolled his eyes. “Get off, you’re heavy,” he whined, wiggling.  
“I’m light as a fucking feather,” Even argued, and Isak let out the softest little giggle.  
“Yeah, with your tummy.”  
“My what?!” Even gasped, mock-offended and biting down on his smile. “I have a six-pack, I’ll have you know.”  
“Nope,” Isak grinned, “you’re soft.”  
“Ugh. I’m hurt, baby. Truly hurt,” Even said, crawling off of him and curling into a ball. Isak tisked and wrapped his arm around the older boy’s waist, taking a deep breath in his hair.  
“It’s okay,” he breathed out. “I think it’s cute. Everything about you is cute.”  
Glancing over his shoulder, Even smiled. “Everything?”  
Isak pressed a kiss to the side of his head. “Every last thing. Now get up, I’m hungry.”  
“Bossy,” Even laughed, grabbing his boy’s hand and dragging him to the kitchen. Isak wasn’t there when his phone started to buzz. 

(20:01) Unknown: Hei, this is Emil from class.  
Unknown: Oskar said you are tutoring him. I also need help. Could we meet sometime, too?  
Unknown: We could make a date of it:)


	59. Chapter fifty-nine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tutoring sesh:/

Chapter 59   
Isak felt a hand on his back and spun around easily, expecting to see Even or Jonas or somebody. When he found Emil smiling at him, he shrunk back.   
“Hi,” Isak managed to squeak after a beat. Emil was tall and built well in the lean, terrifying way of a professional football played. He leaned casually against the locker next to Isak’s, his flop of straight ashy blond hair falling into grey eyes, and scanned Isak’s body up and down.   
“You never replied to my message last night,” Emil said, narrowing his eyes with a small smile. Isak swallowed.   
“Oh, um… phone was dead,” he mumbled, glancing away. The other boy’s smile grew wider.   
“Well, that’s a shame. But I was asking if we could have a study date, too. Oskar said you’re giving him maths help, yeah?”  
“Yeah…”  
“Okay, great. Could you help me, too?”  
Isak prayed that some sort of diversion would occur- maybe he’d sprout wings and be able to fly away or maybe a horse would run through the halls- but nothing happened. With Oskar, sure he was annoyed and sure he didn’t want to help him at all, but with Emil it was different.   
Although he had never openly declared his sexuality, there was no doubt in anybody’s mind that the boy was into both genders. There also wasn’t much doubt that he would go very far to get what he wanted. And Isak seemed to catch him staring a lot.   
“I was already pretty busy, Oskar took, like, my only free time,” Isak half-lied. Emil’s smile grew wider.   
“How about I join then? Oskar won’t mind.”  
What could Isak say to that? No, I’m scared of you? He didn’t have much of a defense. “Okay… I guess that would work.”  
“Wonderful.”

Even walked up behind Isak, who was standing obliviously at his locker, and smiled. He was here to surprise him so that they could go home together. He pressed one hand to the small of his back and whispered, “Hei.”  
He wasn’t expecting Isak to flinch away from him and hit his elbow against the locker. “Fuck,” he breathed, turning and catching Even’s eye. “Sorry, you scared me.”  
Even laughed softly, drawing in his eyebrows in confusion. “Why so jumpy?” he asked, rubbing circles into the dimple of Isak’s back with his thumb.   
“Hm? Oh, just… school stress.”  
Even didn’t like the nervousness in Isak’s eyes when he glanced around for a second before pressing a quick, chaste kiss to his mouth. “Okay,” he said softly, smoothing back some of the smaller boy’s hair. “Don’t stress too hard.”  
Isak shrugged. “Let’s go,” he said, taking Even’s hand and closing his locker. 

The next day, Isak was sitting at one of the tables in the library, texting his boyfriend and waiting for Oskar and Emil to show. 

Isak: I’m boredddd  
Even Kosegruppa <3: sorry baby  
Even Kosegruppa<3: what are you doing?  
Isak: waiting for the kids I’m tutoring   
Even Kosegruppa <3: so noble!  
Isak: haha   
Isak: one of them just showed. See you at home  
Even Kosegruppa <3: love you  
Isak: love you<3

“Hei,” said Oskar, dropping his bag and smiling at Isak. “What’s up?”  
“Nothing much,” Isak shrugged, taking out his notebook. “How are you?”  
“Good. Well, fucked in maths. But that’s why you’re here, right?”  
Isak forced a small smile. “Right.”  
“Hey, man, sorry about that stuff I said, by the way,” Oskar continued, looking away. His cheeks were red from acne scars and new, readily blooming zits, but Isak saw a blush creep across them, too. “On Monday. I was kind of drunk and… yeah. I’m not, like, homophobic.”  
Isak swallowed, glancing down at the table. He didn’t like Oskar by any stretch but he didn’t seem like a horrible guy. He was just another dumb, systematically biased teenage boy who used “That’s so gay,” as an insult and “Don’t be such a girl,” to make fun of his friends. Isak hadn’t been much different, at one point. Even now, he found himself jumping to say that it didn’t matter, because the thought of somebody being afraid of being homophobic because he was on the room still weirded him out slightly (he was trying, though. Always trying.) So, although it wasn’t the best apology, not at all, Isak shrugged. “Yeah,” he said. “Um… thanks. We’re cool.”  
“Cool,” Oskar nodded, looking relieved.   
Just then, Isak felt a fleeting hand touch his shoulders before Emil was pulling out the chair next to him. “Halla,” he said, smiling. Isak tried not to scooch away from him.   
“Hi,” he said flatly. “Are you guys ready to start?”   
“Yeah,” Oskar replied, getting out a chewed-up pencil and his notebook. Emil nodded silently. 

The tutoring was going fine. Or, well. Mostly fine. Oskar seemed genuinely confused about most things. He had a lot of questions but he was trying and Isak didn’t mind walking him through the steps. He also managed to refrain from making any insulting comments, and actually asked about Even with no laughter in his voice, although he seemed a little forced and uncomfortable.   
Emil, on the other hand, was mostly quiet. At one point, Isak was struggling to explain something to Oskar and he stepped in and he clarified it with ease. Isak started to get the idea that he didn’t really need much help. “So how would you do something like this?” he asked, sliding a piece of paper across to the taller boy with a simple trig problem written on it. Emil dragged his chair closer to Isak’s and rested one hand on the edge of Isak’s seat.   
“I don’t know,” he said. “Could you explain it?”  
“Um…” Isak’s breath hitched when Emil’s fingers fluttered against his knee. He wanted to tell him to back the fuck off, but boys… boys weren’t supposed to freak out about stuff like this. “Um… just… look at the angle of depression. What can you find using that?”  
“The angle of elevation.”  
“RIght. And since you have the length of the hypotenuse, what can you do?”  
Isak’s heart was beating faster as Emil’s hand got more firm on his leg, a little higher than his knee, now. He thought of Elias poking and prodding at him at the cabin and tried to focus on breathing.   
“You can find sine of the angle of elevation, which you know is the x over the hypotenuse, so then you can multiply sine of theta by the hypotenuse to find x.”   
“It seems like you understand pretty well,” Isak said, face red as Emil’s hand continued to creep higher and, oh god, what was he doing-  
“Get the fuck off me, man!” Isak finally exclaimed as Emil’s hand curled inside his upper thigh. He pushed away from the table, standing. Oskar looked between the two boys in confusion.  
“Chill, Isak,” said Emil, standing as well. “I’m just being friendly.”  
Isak tried to catch his breath. “I think this was a mistake,” he finally huffed, grabbing his bag. “I think you should go.”  
“Don’t be such a prick,” Emil said, frowning and taking a step forward so that he was almost towering over Isak. “Come on,” he placed one gentle hand on Isak’s waist. “We can be friends, right.”  
“Stop touching me,” Isak said, pushing him away again. Emil sneered.   
“Whatever. Come on, Oskar, let’s go.”  
Oskar hazardously stood up. He looked between Isak and his friend before putting his hands up in quiet surrender. “That was pretty fucked up, man,” he said to Emil, before heading out. The taller boy raised his eyebrows at Isak one more time before disappearing in Oskar’s pursuit.   
Sitting back down, Isak tried to catch his breath. What the fuck had just happened? He thought of Emil’s hand on his thigh, fingers curling in, touching places that only Even was supposed to touch-   
Closing his eyes, the blond boy rested his head on the table. He fumbled in his pocket, looking for his phone. 

Isak: Can you come get me  
Even Kosegruppa <3: of course angel  
Even Kosegruppa <3: Miss me? ;))  
Isak: please just come now  
Isak: yes  
Even Kosegruppa <3: Wait is everything okay?  
Isak: Yes. Just shaken up.   
Even Kosegruppa <3: What’s happened?

Even Kosegruppa <3: Is??  
Isak: Sorry, got distracted. It wasn’t a big deal. I’ll tell you when you get here.  
Even Kosegruppa <3: Okay, as long as you’re okay. I’m on my way.   
Isak: okay  
Isak: thank you.  
Even Kosegruppa <3: don’t thank me  
Even Kosegruppa <3: I love you  
Isak: I love you, too

When Even walked in, he found Isak hunched over one of the library tables, staring at a blank worksheet. “Halla,” he said a bit breathlessly, sitting next to him. Isak looked over and there was… guilt in his eyes?  
“Hei,” Isak said, and his voice was weak and dry. Even reached forward and took one of his hands.   
“Are you ready to tell me what happened?”  
Sighing a long, trembly sigh, Isak shut his eyes. “I just… I… you know those guys I was tutoring?”  
“Yeah?”  
“Yeah, well… one of them… um, one of them is kind of… he’s into guys, and he sometimes… touches me. And when we were studying, he was next to me and he… grabbed my…”  
Even’s grip on Isak’s hand got tighter and he stood, bringing his boy up with him. He pulled Isak tight to his chest. “He touches you? He touched you there?”  
Isak nodded gently. “I… I didn’t mean to let him…”  
“Let him?!” Even said, pulling away and looking down at Isak. “Baby, this wasn’t your fault!”  
“He had his hand on my knee for a while… and then he kept moving up… and I didn't push him off until…”   
Even drew in his eyebrows. “I’m not mad, but… why?”  
“I don’t know,” Isak shrugged, shame breaking over his face. He flushed. “Boys aren’t supposed to care and… I was scared. I don’t know.”  
Heart breaking, Even pulled him close again and smattered kisses onto his face. “Boys are supposed to care. Everyone would care. He violated you and-”  
“Stop, Even, it wasn’t that big of a deal-”  
“It was a big deal! Isak, that is a big deal! Imagine if he’d done that to a girl, would you tell her it wasn’t a big deal. Imagine if he’d done it to me!”  
Isak shut his eyes. “I just… I don’t want it to be a big deal. Hardly anything happened and… I pushed him off.”  
“I’m so proud of you, baby,” Even sighed, bringing him close. “I’m so fucking sorry these things happen to you.”  
“It’s fine,” Isak shrugged. Even hugged him tighter.   
“But it isn’t.”  
“Can we… can we just go home? Please?”  
“Of course.” Even took his hand and lead him towards the door. “Let’s just go home.”

Isak was on the couch, texting Jonas, while Even ordered pizza in the other room. He felt his heart skip a beat when Emil’s name popped up in his notifications. 

Emil: You better not tell anybody about what happened today, you little brat.   
Emil: Nobody would believe you anyway.  
Emil: It’s not like I actually did anything. You just had to freak out, right? Go crying to your boyfriend, right? And now you think everything’s okay again?  
Emil: Wrong.  
Emil: You fucked me over today and made me look like a fool.  
Emil: So watch your back, okay?  
Emil: Because I always get what I want.

Isak’s frown deepened. He felt sweat break onto his palms. What kind of Narcos shit was this? His stomach started to hurt.   
“Issy? What do you want on the pizza?”  
Isak couldn’t take his eyes off his phone. “Whatever,” he said after a moment. Taking a deep breath, he blocked Emil’s number.


	60. Chapter sixty

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ummmmm

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so... the clip... hurt.  
> Me and my girl kaamilama were discussing how the fuck I was going to write the fight scene considering we have zero knowledge about what actually happened so... here you go I guess?  
> Also I'm so drained from today tbh. Like. That hurt so much.  
> But alsoooooo we got to see eVAK SING TOGETHER AND BOY SQUAD BE SO SUPPORTIVE and yeah I'm just having a lot of feels sooo... here ya go

Chapter 60  
“Hey, bro,” said Jonas as he came up to Isak. The blond boy smiled at him.  
“Halla. What’s up?”  
“Um, nothing… I think we’re going out for food after school. You’ll come?”  
“Yeah,” Isak breathed. “Yeah, um, sure. Who’s coming? Just the boys?”  
“Ja, who else?”  
Isak shrugged. “Just asking. So how’d you do on the German quiz?”  
“Mm,” Jonas said, rolling his eyes. “Bad. But it’s chill.”  
Nodding, Isak clapped his back. “I always knew I was smarter than you, man.”  
“Yeah, right,” Jonas laughed as they started to walk away. Just then, a group of their classmates turned the corner. Isak’s heart stopped when he caught Emil’s eye. The boy looked him up and down slowly before licking his lips.  
“...Bro?”  
Isak’s head snapped to Jonas. “Sorry, what?”  
Giving him a weird look, Jonas repeated, “I asked what your plans are for this weekend?”  
“Oh… um, Vilde is nagging me about coming to some karaoke bar with their new buss thing tonight…”  
“Ja, I heard about that from Eva,” Jonas nodded. “You gonna go?”  
“I don’t know,” Isak replied.  
“Yeah,” agreed Jonas, taking a sharp turn into his classroom. “See you.”  
“Bye.”

He was in science with Sana, flipping through their textbook, trying to find proof for his argument. “Nei, see? That couldn’t be right.”  
“You’re an idiot,” Sana laughed shaking her head, making Isak rear back his head.  
“Huh? Me? I’m right, Sana! Look right here-” he jabbed at the textbook passionately when suddenly his phone lit up. He grabbed it and Sana rolled her eyes.  
“What a good student,” she teased, nudging at him. Isak smirked.  
“It’s my father, Sana. I’m being a good son.”

Pappa: Hei Isak, when do you want to talk this weekend?  
Isak: Either day works for us  
Pappa: Okay, could we do a Saturday brunch then?  
Isak: Yeah, sounds good  
Pappa: Great. Is Even coming?  
Isak: Yes.  
Pappa: Okay. Tell him I say hello.  
Isak: I will

“Are you coming to SYNG tonight?” Sana asked, regaining his attention.  
“Hmm?”  
“The karaoke bar our bus is having.”  
“Oh, your bus,” Isak said with a huff. “I’ve gotta say, I liked it better when you were just five. Not that I matter much.”  
“No, you don’t,” Sana agreed. But then she had a quiet moment. “But… I kind of liked it, too.”  
“Wasn’t this your idea, though?”  
The girl shrugged. Isak shrugged back at her.  
“Well, I’ll probably come with the boys.”  
“Cool.”  
Isak nodded. “Very cool.”

Turns out SYNG was a lot of fun. More fun than he’d been anticipating. He’d even managed to get the rest of the boys to show up, and everyone seemed to be having a genuinely good time. Eskild was there, which meant Isak had to sit through a lot of teasing before the older man disappeared to hang out with the girls.  
“Dude, nei, I can’t sing,” Magnus was laughing. Mahdi booed at him, pushing his shoulder.  
“You gotta keep wooing her, man, or she’s gonna lose interest!”  
“Yeah, like, you can’t start treating her like a normal person just because you’re dating,” Jonas chimed in. “The chase is still going.”  
Isak rolled his eyes. “‘The chase,’” he mocked, making Jonas scoff.  
“Like you’d understand dating. You’re fucking married.”  
Isak laughed, and then smiled feeling a strong arm wrap around his chest and Even’s hair brush his face as he kissed his cheek from behind. “What are we talking about?”  
“We think Magnus should serenade his girl,” Mahdi explained.  
“Ja, what do you think?” asked Magnus. “You’re, like, the most romantic guy I’ve ever met.”  
“Pssh, he’s not that great,” Isak lied, and, as soon as he heard that gasp in his ear, he knew something was coming.  
“I’m not the most romantic guy you’ve ever met?” Even asked, moving around to face his boyfriend. Isak laughed and smiled.  
“Nei.”  
“Who’s beaten me?”  
“Mahdi,” said Isak, swiveling his head to look at his friend. Mahdi grinned and slapped him a high five.  
When he looked at Even again, the tall boy was smiling. “I guess I’ll have to change that,” he said.  
“What will you do?”  
“We were talking about serenades, no?”  
Isak raised his eyebrows and grinned. “You? You’re gonna sarande me?”  
“Ja?”  
All the boys cheered, making Even’s smile grow wider. Isak laughed. “Okay, then. Go do your thing, Mr. Romance.”  
Everyone watched excitedly as Even walked to the microphone. He gave Isak a wink- bless his soul, he really sucked at that- before the song started up.  
“Imagine there's no heaven,” he started, and Isak smiled immediately. Damn, his voice was so deep, what the fuck? “It's easy if you try… No hell below us… Above us only sky,” he started bouncing, just like he always did, and Isak gave a little smile because damn, he loved that boy so much.  
“Imagine all the people… Living for today,” smiling, Even sang the littles oohs, and Isak swore his heart would burst. “Imagine there’s no countries…” and then all that love turned to worry, because Even had stopped.  
His perfect blue eyes were trained across the room and his mouth hung open. In an instant, Isak’s brow furrowed and he pushed slightly off the chair, trying to get a better look at his boyfriend as the music played empty in the background. And then he got up and walked over and swallowed his nerves, putting one hand on Even’s back. The older boy watched him with broken, scared eyes a he picked up where Even had left off.  
“...Nothing to kill or die for.” Even watched him, gaze going more tender, and he leaned a little over Isak, who was slightly uncomfortable having an entire bar full of people watch them, but then he was so happy again because Even started singing with him. “And no religion, too.”  
Out of the corner of his eye he saw Magnus rallying the boys, and then they were all screaming along. “Imagine all the people… Living in peace… you-ou-ou!”  
Even was smiling again, one hand tucked against Isak’s back and head tilted just so so that he wasn’t blatantly staring the entire time but continually held his love’s eyes. And sure Isak had noticed the group of boys he’d seen so many times on screen, the boys he’d asked about time and time again come in through the front door, but none of that mattered, because Even was smiling again.  
The whole bar started singing along at the third verse. Isak put his arm around Even and tugged him close, actually having so much fun now, something he never could have imagined. He let out a soft laugh as they rocked against each other, patted Even’s back to the beat, loved how theatractical, how fucking extra his boy was, and then they were looking only at each other, and nothing else meant anything in the world. The song faded out and Even was beaming, pressing a kiss to Isak’s cheek, and Isak couldn’t help but mirror the gesture, a little too forcefully because he even managed to knock off his snapback. “Takk, baby,” Even whispered, and Isak smiled wider and had to kiss him again, on the mouth this time.  
“I love you,” he whispered.  
“I love you more,” Even said back.  
Isak rolled his eyes. “Impossible.”  
“I love you more than anything and everything else in all the universes combined, so,” Even laughed, raising his eyebrows.  
“Well, I love you more than all that, plus one.”  
“Are we really that couple now?” Even asked, pulling him even closer.  
“I guess so,” Isak shrugged, and then somebody else was grabbing him by the waist and booing in his ear and Jonas was dragging him away, going on about how yes, everyone knows you guys are in love, no need to rub it in their faces.  
Isak grabbed Even’s hand tight and felt the laugh that rumbled through his chest as the two of them got dragged away in a chain. “I needed a beer in my hand yesterday,” JOnas was saying, and Mahdi and Mags joined them on the way out and everything, in that moment, was so goddamn good.  
And, then, it wasn’t anymore. 

When the fist hit his face- he didn’t see whose first- his nose cracked so loud that it rang in his ears for a solid three minutes. He fell back and hit the ground with a pained shout, hand immediately flying to his face. It came back red with blood.  
“Isak?!” Even was kneeling in front of him, a little too blurry and far too worried. Isak tried to stop crying, tried to stop bleeding and stop swelling and even managed to laugh a little.  
“I’m fine,” he said, but his nose was pulsating and the tears wouldn’t stop.  
“Come here,” Even was saying, lifting him and bringing him back behind the fight. Isak caught a glimpse of Mahdi throwing himself violently at the other boys, Even’s old friends, holy fuck they’d gotten into a fight with Even’s old friends. “... can you hear me, baby?”  
Slowly, Isak let his gaze drift to his boyfriend’s face. “Hmmm?”  
“Can you hear me?”  
Even was pushing back Isak’s hair, his hands cool and soothing against his burning face. “Isak?”  
Isak nodded mutely. His head felt like it was going to explode. He couldn’t feel his nose.  
“Are you okay?”  
Isak took deep breaths. “I don’t know.” He stood up and touched his nose, and his whole body throbbed so he whimpered and pulled away. Just then, the other boys ran over, along with Sana. She pushed through to get a better look at him and he remember that one of those boys was her brother. She looked at him with the most horrified eyes and he wanted to tell her it was okay, it wasn’t her fault, he wasn’t angry with her, but he seemed to have lost his ability to form words once again, and then Even was saying they were going to the hospital and the boys all agreed.  
“Don’t need one,” Isak mumbled, but Even slung one arm under his armpits and dragged him off towards somebody’s car or the tram or something and all the fight went out of him.  
He couldn’t understand why everything had happened. It had all gone down so quickly. He felt fucking stupid and fucking angry and-  
“We’re gonna fix you right up, okay, baby?” Even was mumbling, kissing his hair, gentle and tender and oh-so-upset, and Isak realized that as long Even was okay, as long as he and Even were okay, then everything else would work itself out. He reached out and took one of the older boy’s clammy hands and let his eyes drift shut.  
The hospital trip went quickly. Isak was out of it most of the time and, before he knew it, the other boys had left and he and Even were at home.  
“I got ice for your nose,” his boyfriend said, hovering over him. Isak groaned slightly and curled deeper into his pillows.  
“Nei,” he whined.  
“Yes, it’ll help. I promise.”  
“Nei,” Isak whined again, tears lining his voice as his nose throbbed again. Ice would make it worse, he was sure.  
“Baby,” Even said, desperate and upset. “Please? The doctor said you have to ice it or it’ll get worse.”  
Submitting, Isak rolled over and allowed Even to press a bag of ice to his nose, as gentle as possible. Isak hissed and blinked rapidly. “I’m sorry, angel,” Even said softly, looking so incrediably hurt by everything that had happened. “Try to hold this here, please.”  
Isak nodded and took the bag as Even crawled into bed beside him, pulling him onto his chest. “I’m so sorry,” he repeated, and Isak knew he wasn’t talking about the ice anymore. “I- I should’ve told you- I should’ve-”  
“I’m not mad, baby,” Isak said soothingly. He gently reached up and stroked the older boy’s face. “I promise.”  
“But- shouldn’t we talk about-”  
“I’m sleepy, Even,” sighed Isak. “Tomorrow we can talk, okay? For now I just wanna sleep.”  
Even pulled him tighter. “Come here,” he said. “Let’s sleep.”


	61. Chapter sixty-one

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Brunch!

Chapter 61  
“Okay,” Isak said, adjusting his shirt. “Do I look okay?”  
“Why are you nervous? He’s your dad, love,” Even said, wrapping his arms around Isak’s waist and resting his head on the smaller boys shoulder.   
“I’m not nervous,” Isak said nervously. Even chuckled and press a firm kiss to the crook of his neck.   
“It’ll be fine,” he promised.   
“I just don’t want this to go horribly. We haven’t really talked since… everything… and I don’t want it to end up like last time.”  
“It won’t,” Even assured him, rubbing his back soothingly. “If you want privacy, I don’t have to come.”  
Isak made an incredulous face over his shoulder. “Are you joking?”  
“I just thought I’d offer.”  
“I want you there,” Isak said, nodding affirmatively. “I need you there.”  
Even kissed his cheek again. “How are you gonna explain your nose?” he asked, frowning at the poor, swollen mess on his baby’s face.   
“I don’t know… I guess I could tell him that I got in a fight? It wouldn’t be the first time.”  
“Don’t talk about the yakuza fights, you know I hate that,” Even groaned, burying his face in Isak’s shoulder. “You were just a baby! I hate when you get hurt now, let alone then.”  
“You didn’t even know me,” Isak laughed, shrugging Even off of him.   
The older boy made an offended noise. “Well, it still pains me.”  
“Whatever. Seriously, though, do I look okay?”  
“You look very handsome.”  
“Takk. Now get dressed or we’ll be late.”  
“I am dressed,” Even said, raising his eyebrows.   
Isak stared at him. “Nei,” he said after a beat. “Nei, you’re not wearing a hoodie to a serious brunch with my dad and his fiancee.”  
“What’s wrong with my hoodie?”  
“It’s not even clean! It has a stain!”  
“Fine, fine,” Even conceded, whipping the hoodie off and throwing at at Isak, who sputtered indignantly.   
“You’re ruining my hair,” he whined, and Even laughed. 

By the time they were at the cafe, Isak was even more nervous. “You’re gonna be fine,” Even said again, rubbing his leg. Isak let out a trembly sigh.   
“I know, I’m just-” he got cut off when he spotted his dad and Nina approaching. “Fuck, it’s them.”  
Isak’s dad was tall, taller than Isak, and he had greying hair and blue eyes. Nina was small and had long, smooth brown hair and hazel eyes. She smiled hesitantly as they approached.   
Immediately, Even stood up and stuck his hand out towards Isak’s dad. The smaller boy gaped up at him.   
“Sir, I would just like to say I’m sorry for getting violent last time we were together,” he said, and Isak’s heart cracked in half because how had he managed to make such an adorable gentleman fall in love with grumpy little him?  
Isak’s dad looked taken aback. “Um… it’s okay, son. You… you weren’t in your right mind.”  
Isak didn’t like that, and he had a feeling that Even didn’t, either, but the older boy nodded and he and Isak’s dad shook hands. Even then took Nina’s hand and gave it a soft squeeze. “I'm Even,” he introduced himself. “Last time we met, I didn’t get to properly greet you.”  
“I’m Nina,” she said back, smiling more warmly now. Even sat down, put his hand back on Isak’s knee.   
“What happened to your face, Isak?” his dad asked, and the younger boy flushed and looked away.   
“I- uh-”  
“Are you getting into fights again?” Terje asked with some tiredness in his voice.   
Isak sighed. “It wasn’t- it wasn’t like that this time. This guy was being an asshole and… yeah. No more gang fights.”  
“Okay,” his dad accepted. “Just be careful.”  
Isak nodded.   
“So,” Terje continued, “as you know, Nina and I are getting married.” Nina beamed at him. “We haven’t set the date, but it’ll be sometime next year. And, Isak… I would like it if you were my best man?”  
“What?” Isak asked immediately, jaw dropping.   
His dad flushed. “I- you’re my son. And I do want us to be close, Isak. But, if you don’t want to do it, then… I understand. I haven’t been a good father to you.”  
Isak furrowed his brow. “Can Even come? Or is that too…?”  
Terje shook his head rapidly. “Of course Even can come. I would be so happy if you both came. And that’s another thing I wanted to apologize for, boys. I… I was raised with a lot of prejudice. And I never questioned it. That isn’t any excuse, but… it’s how I was raised. And, so, when things began to change, I was… confused. It didn’t bother me much, because it didn’t affect me, but then you… telling me something that I’d always believed was so fundamentally wrong… I just… you know, I wasn’t always a bad person, Isak. There was a time when I loved mama and I’ve always loved you, but I let anger and pain make me ugly. And cruel. And I’m sorry.”  
Isak blinked at him. Even was squeezing his knee but he barely felt it. Taking a deep breath, Isak’s dad continued. “But Nina…” he looked at her with a bittersweet smile. “She’s changed everything. After you two came over that night, and she found out what I had done to you, she almost left. But, instead, she stuck by me, and taught me things, and I began to see how at fault I’d been for so long. And I really want to believe that I’m a better person that I was before. If not, I’m trying. To learn. And I… I know that that can’t make up for everything… or anything… but I hope, maybe, you believe me when I say I’m trying really hard to be a better man. For myself, and for Nina, and for you, Isak. Because I really let you down. And I hope, in time, I can start to be there for you again.”  
Nobody spoke for a while. Eventually, Isak swallowed and whispered, “Takk, pappa. I, um… I’m glad you’re trying. And I think… I think, yeah. I’d like to be your best man.”  
“Really?” Terje asked, and he almost sounded like a little kid. Isak nodded. “Oh, I’m so glad, Isak. I’m so glad. Thank you.”  
The teenager smiled and half shrugged. “Yeah,” he said.   
The waiter came at that moment. Everyone was happy for the distraction.   
By the time the food was there, Even was leading the conversation charmingly, mostly with Nina and a little with Terje, and Isak was being pretty quiet and leaning on his arm a little too obviously, but he was shaken up and vulnerable and he needed physical contact, damn it.   
“Alright, ready to go?” Even asked when they’d finished and Terje and Nina were getting up. Isak looked at him a little stupidly and nodded. “Okay,” Even took his hand and stood him up. He shook his dad’s hand again, and gave Nina a brief kiss to the cheek, before stepping back.   
Terje took a deep breath before moving forward and hugging Isak, careful not to hurt his nose. “It was really nice seeing you, son,” he whispered. Isak nodded wordlessly. He hugged Nina, too, and then they were going their separate ways.   
Even kept one arm tucked around Isak’s waist. “That went so well,” he murmured into the smaller boy’s hair. Isak nodded.   
“Yeah,” he breathed. “I wasn’t expecting… that.”  
“I’m so happy for you, baby,” Even said.   
Isak flushed. “And look at you, prince charming. I’m surprised Nina didn’t decide to marry you, instead.”  
“What can I say?” Even asked, tugging him a little closer. “I’m a natural flirt.”  
“True,” Isak laughed. “Good thing you need me to pay half the rent.”  
“Yep,” Even agreed. “That’s the only reason I’m keeping you around.” 

When they got home, Even dragged Isak into bed, laying him down and covering im up with pillows and blankets. “What are you doing?” the smaller boy asked.   
“You’re still injured.”  
“I’m literally fine.”  
“You’re not,” Even cooed. “You need rest.” He layed down beside Isak and leaned on his head on the smaller boy’s chest. “You’re exhausted.”  
“Am not.”  
Even breathed against his shirt and held him tighter. “Well, I’m tired. I’m gonna fall asleep and then you won’t be able to get up, so you’ll have to sleep, too.”  
Isak harrumphed, taking out his laptop and setting it up on Even’s back. Turns out the older boy wasn’t kidding about being tired. Soon, he was snoring softly against Isak’s chest.   
Isak opened a new tab and checked his email. His stomach sank when he saw his first unread email.   
Emil had written him. “Isak Yaki. You blocked me, my number, didn’t you? That was a stupid thing to do.   
“I like seeing you at school. You’re so pretty. It’s a shame you never say hi to me, though. I would love if we could talk sometimes. You get me so excited.   
“How’s that boyfriend of yours? I heard he’s a crazy piece of shit. You could do so much better.   
“Imagine me fucking you, little boy. You’d have a lot of fun. I promise I’d be better than him. Pin you down and make you scream.   
“You’ll come around. They always do. But I’m serious, it was pretty stupid of you to block my number, because now you’ve gotten me angrier than before. And I don’t take well to being angry.  
“I suggest you reply to this email, or I’ll have to approach you in person. And I don’t think you’d like very much. I don’t think your boyfriend would like it, either.”  
Isak took a long, deep breath. He clicked the reply button. “Stop harassing me or I’ll report you,” he typed, clicking send as fast as possible. He closed his eyes. His email quickly got a response.   
“That was a bad move, Isak.”  
Sighing, Isak deleted the chain and then permanently deleted it out of his trash, as well.  
Even shifted against him. “Move your computer,” he mumbled. Isak laughed softly through his nose and pushed the back, curling up closer to him.   
“I’m not tired, let’s do something more fun.”  
Even groaned softly. “Neiii.”  
“Yessss. I’m hungry and I want to do something.”  
“I’d make out with you but I’d hurt you,” Even mumbled. Isak huffed.   
“Blow me, then. Or let’s make lunch.”  
“Are those two options equally desirable to you?” Even laughed.   
“Yes. Or, I’d prefer both.”  
“Okay, let’s do both, then,” agreed Even, and he pushed off and started to tug on Isak’s waist band. Isak smirked down at him, and, yeah, it felt good, and for a moment he forgot about everything, but there was an itch in the back of his head that wouldn’t go away.   
“That was a bad move, Isak.”


	62. Chapter sixty-two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Isak tells Even about the messages, Isak goes to report him, Emil sees him, things... happen... this gets really real and dark  
> trigger warning

Chapter 62  
Isak stared up at the ceiling. It was currently 2 in the morning and he could not shut off his mind. His head was pounding from the concussion he’d been diagnosed with at the hospital, too. Weren’t concussions supposed to make you tired?  
Even shifted and Isak tensed. The older boy would be so disappointed if he woke up and found Isak with his eyes wide open. You should wake him, the smaller boy thought. That’s what he’d want.  
Curling into Even’s side, Isak let out a long breath. You should tell him about the messages, too, he told himself. He deserves that.  
Resolving, Isak pressed a soft kiss into Even’s chest. “Baby,” he whispered. When Even didn’t stir, he nudged him gently. Finally, the taller boy drifted to consciousness.  
“Is?” he rasped, rolling over slightly to face Isak. “You okay?”  
“Can’t sleep.”  
Even frowned and pulled him close, smoothing back his hair. “What’s wrong?” he asked softly, breath warm against Isak’s ear. Isak’s heart thudded as he prepared himself.  
“Don’t be mad,” he started, and immediately regretted it. Even pulled away and looked down at him.  
“What’s happened?”  
“Um…” Isak swallowed. “Um, you know that guy?”  
“That guy?”  
Blinking, Isak looked away. “That guy who… on Wednesday…”  
In an instant, Even had both hands on his face and was searching his eyes. “What did he do?”  
“He, um… he’s been emailing me.”  
“Emailing?”  
Isak nodded guiltily. “Well, he was texting, but I blocked his number and so-”  
“What is he saying? What’s his name?”  
This is where the younger boy flushed. “Emil. And just… stuff. Nothing… that bad.”  
Even gripped his jaw a little more firmly. “Isak, what is he saying?”  
Isak drew his knees to his chest, trying to make himself smaller. “That he wants to hook up,” he finally breathed. “And… that he always gets what he wants.”  
Even’s breath hitched. “You’re reporting him,” he said definitively after a moment.  
“Nei, Even-”  
“Yes! You are reporting him! Isak, he violated you and now he’s harassing you! Wh- can I see the messages?”  
“I deleted them.”  
“What? Why would you- Isak?!”  
Isak blinked, burrowed deeper into bed. “I didn’t want it on my phone, it was- I just didn’t want it there.”  
Even pulled him closer, smoothed back his hair. “What did he say to you, baby?”  
“He said you’re crazy and I could do better,” Isak whispered as quietly as he could. He took a deep, shaky breath. “He said he wanted to make you mad and that he wanted to pin me down until I screamed and-”  
“Shhh,” Even soothed, rubbing his arm up and down gently. He was angry, seething, but he had to stay calm. “You’re okay.”  
Isak nodded numbly, curling his fingers against Even’s chest. “I’m sorry,” he whispered.  
“Don’t be sorry. Try to sleep, okay? We’ll deal with this tomorrow.” Even’s grip with metal as he held Isak against him. “Try to sleep.”  
Nodding into his chest, Isak closed his eyes. 

When his alarm woke him up the next morning, Even was gone. Isak was cold, somehow he’d lost all the blankets, and he felt a little sick thinking about what had happened in the night.  
“Halla,” he heard, and looked up. Even was leaning against the door.  
“Halla.”  
“How are you?”  
“M’kay.”  
Walking over, Even sat beside him. “Are you going to report him?”  
Isak sighed, body becoming small and crumpled. “I don’t- I don’t want to make him angrier.”  
“Baby, this- you can’t let him scare you out of doing anything.”  
“But what will I say? I deleted our messages, I don’t- I don’t have any proof-”  
“Isak, go to a teacher. Tell them what’s been happening. They’re not going to send you away just because you don’t have proof.”  
Isak sighed. “Yeah,” he said after a moment. “Yeah, you’re right.”  
“Okay. Now let’s get ready, or else you’ll be late.”  
“Okay.”  
They both stood, Isak wobbling slightly. He was so weak after the goddamn fight on Friday. Even tugged him into a tight hug. “Hey, baby?”  
“Yeah?”  
“Are you okay?”  
Isak shut his eyes, tightening his grip around the older boy’s back. “I think so.”

Turns out, the moment Even was out of sight, Isak wasn’t so okay. He was standing outside of the school counselor's office, pacing back and forth, trying to will himself to go in. The longer he waited, the more humiliating it seemed. And terrifying. Finally, he took out his phone. 

Isak: I can’t do it  
Even Kosegruppa<3: Isak, just take a deep breath, baby  
Isak: no, i can’t do it even, i can’t

Even Kosegruppa<3: I’m gonna come meet you  
Isak: What?! No you have class  
Even Kosegruppa: don’t care  
Isak: don’t come!! Come tomorrow when you don’t have class  
Even Kosegruppa: Do you promise you’ll do it with me tomorrow?  
Isak: yes, just don’t come now. Please  
Even Kosegruppa<3: Okay baby. Try to calm down, okay? I’ll see you this afternoon and we’ll talk more  
Even Kosegruppa<3: I love you  
Isak: I love you too

Turning around, Isak headed away from the office. As soon as he got into the hall, his blood ran cold. Emil was leaning against one of the lockers, talking to some boys. He caught Isak’s eye and his expression went from pleasant to furious. Isak stopped breathing.  
Emil’s gaze was ice as he pushed off the locker. Isak put his head down and started to walk away, trying not to panic as Emil began to follow him. He turned a corner and regretted it; nobody was in that hall. He could hear Emil’s footsteps behind him and then he was being shoved.  
“Did you just report me, you little shit?”  
Isak stumbled forward before turning around putting his hands up when Emil shoved him a second time, this time into the lockers. His head burst into radiant white pain. “You think you can just report me like this?”  
The bell rang suddenly, and Isak tried to move away but he was wobbly with pain and he couldn’t really see straight and Emil was pinning him down. “You think you’re gonna get away with this?”  
“I didn’t-”  
“Do you think I’m stupid, Isak? Is that what you think?” Emil smiled, dipped his head closer to Isak’s ear. “Oh, but now it’s gonna be so much better. It’s gonna feel so much sweeter, fucking you when I know you just fucked me over. You’re gonna scream so loud.”  
Isak tried to focus on breathing but Emil had slammed his head against the locker again and his vision was going in and out. “Please,” he whispered.  
“That’s right, little boy,” Emil sneered. “Beg for it.”

Jonas: Hey man, Isak’s in school right?  
Even: Yeah, why?  
Jonas: He never came to English  
Even: Shit  
Jonas: What’s wrong?  
Even: Can you call me?  
Jonas: Yeah

“Hey, man,” Jonas said into the phone. Even was puffing out cold air, walking quickly to the tram.  
“Hi. So Isak never showed?”  
“No. What’s going on?”  
“Have you texted him?”  
“Yeah, he didn’t reply.”  
“Okay. Okay. I’m coming now,” Even said, finally reaching the tram stop.  
“What’s happening?” Jonas asked, his voice getting more worried.  
“He- um. This guy’s been… harassing him and stuff. He kind of felt him up last week and Isak went to report him today and now he’s missing and-”  
“He what? Who is this guy?!”  
“His name is Emil-”  
“FUCKING Emil fucking touched Isak?!” Even could hear the outrage in his voice.  
“Yeah, and now I’m worried he-”  
“Shit. Oh shit, man. Fuck.”  
“Yeah. I’m almost at the school. Could you just- look for him or something? I have no idea where he’d be…”  
“Yeah, yeah. Should I get the boys? To help?”  
“Sure. I just… Go, I hope he’s okay,” Even said, trying to steady his breathing. 

Emil pushed Isak against the desks, not flinching at their scratching sound, although it made Isak’s head split open again. “Please don’t,” the smaller boy whispered as Emil grabbed his shoulders, shoved him into the wall, face first. His nose hit the plaster and tears broke into his eyes as he let out a sob. Any strength he’d had disappeared.  
“Listen to me, Isak, you’re gonna take what I give you and you’re gonna like it, okay? And you’re not gonna run home and tell anybody about this, right? Or else I’ll make this a hell of a lot worse.”  
He shoved him again, and Isak rested his head against the wall, heart beat loud in his ears. The wall was grey and cold and smooth, and it worked like anesthetic. Emil’s belt coming undone sounded tunneled, echoed, and Isak fingers curled.  
“No,” he whispered when the older boy started tugging at his pants, but Emil’s hand was against the back of his neck and Isak couldn’t move, couldn’t breathe. Couldn’t think. He remembered Emil’s hand in between his legs, words like “scream” and “bad” and “stupid.”  
He remembered Even’s concerned eyes, gentle touch, and the feeling of heartbreak and vomit. He didn’t remember that he was in a classroom with Emil, tried not to think about it. The thought of Even had him struggling again for a moment but Emil shoved his face one more time and by that point his mind felt like mush and Emil’s hard on against his ass felt like everything he’d ever been afraid of and nothing at all. 

“Hey, did you find him?” Even panted, running into Jonas. The boy shook his head, panic written across his face.  
“I checked the counselor's office and all his classrooms. I asked the girls and the boys are looking now.”  
“Fuck,” Even lowered his head between his hands. “He has a concussion, Jonas, he’s so weak right now.”  
Jonas nodded, blinking back tears. “We have to find him.”  
“Are you guys talking about Isak?”  
Even spun around. There was a stocky, acne-ridden kid behind them. “What?”  
“Isak? Are you looking for Isak? Sorry, I just know you’re both…”  
“Have you seen him, Oskar?” Jonas asked. The kid nodded.  
“Yeah, um, him and Emil were walking together… I texted him because I know they’re not… friends… but he didn’t respond.”  
Even took two strides forward and grabbed his shoulders. “Where? Where did you see them?”  
Oskar looked up at him with wide eyes. “Um- let me show you. It was near my Norwegian class.”  
Nodding once, Even let him go. Jonas texted the boys where they were headed. 

“You’re gonna take it so good,” Emil was purring, still grinding against Isak’s ass. The smaller boy could hear himself quietly sobbing, see himself pressed up against the wall, nose dripping blood again, but he felt disconnected from it all. He focused on one spot on the wall, where it was lighter than all the other spots. Something must’ve been hanging there. Emil’s hand found his hair, pulled his head back, but his eyes stayed on the spot. The other boy smelled of aftershave and body odor and his fingers were cold and smudged with ink from the test he’d taken earlier. Isak’s hands were cold, too, and he was starting not to feel them. He was starting not to feel his heart, either, only the dull ache of his breathing and the skin-on-skin contact that felt like sandpaper against him. He was aware that he was crying but he couldn’t feel the tears on his cheeks or even the sobs pulsing through him. He felt his boxers be pulled down and closed his eyes, finally. Lashes to cheek, forehead to wall, and nothing but the buzz of electric fences inside his head as somebody touched somebody’s hole, proded at it with a finger too skinny and boney and with no love at all.

As soon as Oskar lead the boys around the corner, Even felt his heart stop beating. There was quiet sobbing coming from somewhere, along with the occasional thud.  
Even pushed past the others, past Jonas and Oskar and Magnus, who’d joined them, and started running towards the sound. The hallway seemed to stretch forever until the sobbing got louder. He started to check every room.  
And then he slammed open one of the doors, and there they were. Isak, slumped up against one wall, eyes closed and head lolling, while a 6’5 giant with the cruelest eyes Even had ever seen pinned up there and bit along his shoulder, hand in his ass, clothes on the floor. Emil pulled away as soon as Even walked in, looked at him with surprise, and Isak immediately collapsed.  
Even’s world went blurry and maroon around the edges as Isak lowered his head into his arms. He was in his big, fluffy white sweater and one of his scarves. He was naked below the waist and this- this monster was,too. 

Isak was vaguely aware that something had hause Emil had stopped touching him. Maybe a teacher walked in. The thought made him panic, scramble for his boxers because he didn’t want anybody to see him naked and then somebody was pushing back his hair, whispering in his ear that they were here now, and he looked up and saw Magnus and he didn’t understand. He started crying again, harder this time, chest tight with guilt and panic and disgust, and he spit up some of the blood that had been dripping into his throat. 

Emil’s head against the desk made a sharp noise as Even hit him again and again and again. He wasn’t a fighter, he had never known the feeling of somebody’s face coming undone under your fist, but everytime he thought of stopping the urge to kill this boy overwhelmed him even more. “YOU FCUCKER!” he was screaming, spit flying from his lips, and Emil would have been able to fight back if Jonas hadn’t been there, too, just as angry as Even. Magnus had gone to Isak, gone to help him get dressed, hold him as the boy sobbed, tender and caring in a way that Even just couldn’t be right now because his ears were ringing and he’d never been so enraged in his life. 

Isak gripped Magnus’s back like his life depended on it. He was crying so hard that he was sure he was going to throw up his ribs soon and he felt like he was drowning, felt like he was dying, and he almost wished he was as removed as he’d been while it was happening because at least then he wasn’t so scared. “It’s okay now,” Magnus was rambling, and Isak was almost sure he was crying, too, and he was also aware that Mahdi was come running in and that a teacher and some other kids had gathered and that the teacher had his hands on Even- Even. 

Whoever was pulling at his shoulders and telling him to stop was about to get punched, too. Even spun around and stared at the face of his P.E teacher from last year, stare at this balding middle aged man who looked scared and confused. Emil’s blood ran down his hands and stained the cuffs of his sleeves. He felt the fight start to go out of him and suddenly became aware of the painful silence in the room, except for Isak’s sobbing. Isak’s sobbing.  
Turning away from his teacher, Even walked to his love and got down on both knees. Magnus was still holding him, almost rocking him, and Isak’s eyes were clenched tightly closed. “Halla, baby,” Even managed to whisper, and the smaller boy’s gaze snapped open. Magnus let go of him and he almost fell onto Even, collapsed into him and cried so hard that Even nearly cried, too. “It’s okay, now,” he said, voice a ghost of itself, vacant. “I’m here.”

The school tried to make them say, make them answer questions, talk to the police because somebody ha called the police, but Jonas and Magnus and Mahdi shoved a path through everyone and Even held Isak tight against his chest, face hidden from the world, and walked them out of there.  
When they got home, it was far too quiet. Isak had stopped crying and his head felt too heavy, stuffed with cotton and novocaine and things he’d thought could never happen to him. A sob ripped through Even the older boy fell onto his knees and took Isak down with him but the smaller boy didn’t say anything, only shut his eyes. “I’m so sorry, baby, I’m so sorry-” Even was rambling, and Isak wanted to say that he was the weak one, he was the one who was sorry, but he couldn’t say anything at all. “I love you so much, Isak. I love you.”  
Isak couldn’t walk, couldn't’ find his legs or his words. Somehow, sometime, Even carried him to bed, tucked him among the blankets like a china doll. He brought food but Isak didn’t eat it, didn’t look at it, instead only pulled Even into bed beside him and held him so tightly that the older boy had some trouble breathing. The blood had dried on his face and he knew somewhere that he needed to go to the hospital again, needed to shower, needed to talk to the police, but his heart was beating so slowly, and for now he just wanted to forget about everything. He just wanted to sleep.


	63. Chapter sixty-three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Healing begins

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi all<3  
> First off, I just want to thank everyone for their continued support and praise of what I'm doing here. It really means so much to me.  
> Second, I want to address last chapter. I know that it was upsetting, and I'm sorry that some people considered it too much. But, as much as I love getting feedback and providing people with something that they like to read, it's more important to me that I write about things that I think need to be written about.  
> Every 98 seconds, somebody is sexually assaulted.  
> 66% of rape victims are between the ages of 12 and 19.  
> 10% of rape victims are male.  
> These problems are even more relevant in the LGBT community.  
> 26% of openly gay men are sexually assaulted. That's over 1 in 4 men.  
> 59% of rapes are committed somebody whom the victim knows.  
> It's scary, and it's dark, but it's real and it's all around us. Rape and sexual assault are taboo issues in a way that suicide, self-harm, drug abuse, and mental illnesses are not. I think it's because, with the topics I just named, there's a sense of control. The individual is the only party involved, the "victim" is also the "perpetrator." These things feel safe because they can be filed away as something that somebody "does to themself." Whereas, with sexual assault, there is no control. There is no sense of control or distance or "I would never do that." We can only hope that these things don't happen to us. And that's really scary.  
> But by avoiding these topics, labeling them too dark to deal with, we're choosing to be happy not knowing. To isolate those who have gone through it. To make them feel as if they are different, they are not to have books written about them, they are not to have their stories told.  
> And I don't want that blind eye to be my reality, you know? I hope you don't either.  
> Love you all. <3  
> Be kind to yourselves.

Chapter 63  
There had been a lot of phone calls. A lot of phone calls.  
First from teachers and parents and the police. Then from friends, once they thought an appropriate amount of time had passed. “I’m so tired of calls,” Isak had mumbled on the third day, eyes shut. Even turned his phone off after that.  
After the preliminary legalities had been dealt with and the hospital had been visited, the door to the flat stayed closed for the most part. People came and Even would answer them, but usually Isak was asleep or pretending to be.  
On the fifth day, Even was holding him, running his hands through the younger boy’s sweaty hair and trying not to cry, when Isak looked up at him. “Where’s Baz?” he whispered, voice course from disuse. Even felt his whole body go limp with love at the sound of it and he pulled Isak a little closer. After a second, he replayed the question in his head because he hadn’t really heard it.  
“Baz? I think he’s just in the living room.”  
Leaning his head back on Even’s chest, Isak sighed. He didn’t say anything for a while, but eventually he spoke up again. “Can we walk him?”  
“Walk him?” Even repeated instinctively, heart swelling because Isak had hardly left bed in days.  
“Yeah.”  
“Yeah. Of course we can walk him, baby. Of course.” Even knew he was rambling but his relief was overwhelming.  
Even waited for Isak to stand, and, when he did, the older boy wanted to hold him again because he looked so small in his wrinkled tee shirt and boxers. He rubbed his eyes, smudging at the dark circles that had stained underneath them. Even brushed at his hair. He didn’t want to ask if Isak was okay because how could he be okay?  
“Wanna get dressed?” he asked instead, threading his fingers through the smaller boy’s. Isak nodded a small nod. “Okay,” Even whispered, ghosting a kiss over his ear. “Want me to get you clothes?” Isak nodded again.  
He sat on the edge of the mattress as Even dug through their drawers. Eventually he pulled out a fresh tee, a hoodie, and a pair of jeans. Isak took them and stared for a while before letting out a long breath and taking off his shirt. Even didn’t know what to do so he looked away. 

On the walk, Isak clung to Even, face turned a little bit into his chest as the older boy kept one arm around him. Baz padded in front of them, nosing at the cold dirt. He started chewing some of the dead grass until Even nudged him away from it. A mom with her little girl walked by and she stopped to pet Baz, fingers tiny and chubby and Even smiled down at her. “He’s very friendly,” he assured her. Baz preened at the attention, rubbing against her shins.  
“I’ve seen you walking him before,” the mom said. “I’m Anne.”  
“Even,” he said pleasantly. Isak was getting cold and tired and his chest hurt. When he didn’t say anything, Even rubbed up and down his arm. “This is Isak.”  
“That’s nice,” Anna replied. She took her daughter’s hand. “Come on, sweetie, we’ve got to go. It was nice meeting you,” she added, waving to the boys. Even nodded with a grin that fell as soon as they were out of sight.  
“Do you want to go back?” he asked. Isak wilted further into him with a nod. 

By the time they were back, it was getting dark out. “Shower?” Even asked hesitantly. Isak shrugged, licking his lips. Even drew him close. He couldn’t seem to make himself stop holding the younger boy constantly. The thought of what had happened when he let go was-  
It was too much.  
“It will make you feel better,” he whispered into Isak’s hair.  
After a while, the smaller boy pulled back slightly. “Okay,” he whispered.  
They walked to the bathroom and Isak slowly disrobed. “Do you want… should I…”  
The smaller boy flushed red and blinked at the tears that had broken into his eyes. He hadn’t been crying much since it happened. After going home, he’d gone numb. So Even wasn’t expecting him to cry now. “You can still look at me,” he said almost pleadingly. “I’m not- broken.”  
Even nodded furiously. “You’re not broken,” he agreed. “I’m sorry, baby. I just don’t want to make uncomfortable. I don’t know what to do,” he admitted. Isak brought his hands to his face.  
“It doesn’t have to be different now,” he sobbed. “It- you don’t have to treat me differently now. Please- please don’t let it change us, please-”  
Even was engulfing him, suffocating him and smothering him with everything he had. “It won’t. Nothing can change us.”

The next day, Jonas came over. His eyes were red and his nose was runny. “Please,” he said. “Please, just let me see him.”  
Even nodded once. “Wait here.”  
He walked into the bedroom, where Isak was curled up on his phone. “It’s Jonas. He… he really wants to see you, Is.”  
Isak didn’t look up. “Okay.”

With Jonas perched on the edge of the bed and Isak smiling up at him about some stupid joke, Even felt like he could breathe again. “How are the boys?” the blond asked after a while. “Do they fucking miss me?”  
Jonas nodded. “Yeah. Definitely.” He got quiet. “Everyone does.”  
Isak’s happiness, what little of it there had been, seemed to dim. “Sorry,” he whispered, and Jonas took it like a punch.  
“No! No, it’s not your fault, what the fuck? Everyone’s sorry for you!” Isak was gap mouthed and Jonas tired to backpedal. “I mean, not like you’re some charity case, just-” he broke off his sentence and lowered his head into his hands. “We’re just really sorry, Isak. Why- I’m just really sorry.”  
Isak stared at the sheet he was clutching. “You couldn’t have done anymore than what you did. You saved me. You shouldn’t be sorry.”  
Jonas nodded. “I- I just mean- I wish it didn’t happen.”  
There was a long stretch of quiet before Isak shrugged. “So do I.” The clock kept ticking. “I’m tired,” he said after a beat. Jonas nodded again and Even showed him the door. 

That was a good day. The next day, Even woke to Isak being sick over the side of the bed because he’d gotten so worked up in a dream that he couldn’t keep what little dinner he’d eaten down.  
“No, fuck, baby,” the older boy was scrambling to him, rubbing his back as Isak trembled. As soon as he was empty he crawled into Even’s arms, stomach aching.  
“He kept touching me, he wouldn’t stop,” he sobbed. Even couldn’t say anything but I love you, I love you, I love you.

“I think you should try it,” Even whispered later that day. Isak shook his head again. Even sighed. “You need to talk to somebody, baby. Somebody who knows what they’re doing, who knows what to say.”  
“I can’t,” Isak said, voice cracking. “I can’t do that, Evi. I can’t.”  
“Please just consider it,” Even begged. Isak didn’t respond. 

When Eskild came by, he was crying. He kept holding Isak, rocking him. “Why did this happen, Baby Jesus?” he said at one point with a breathy laugh that wasn’t sincere. “I don’t get it.”  
Isak swallowed. “I don’t get it, either.”

“During one of my first episodes, Sonja and I were on a break. She was mad at me for acting… crazy. I wasn’t diagnosed yet. But, anyway, I went out to some club. I met some people… they seemed so cool. I drank a lot. I did some other stuff. And then I went home with them. I don’t remember what happened after that, but I woke up naked and sore three hours away from home. I still don’t remember what happened. You’re not alone, Issy, okay?” Even’s voice shattered. “I can- I’m here.”  
Isak couldn’t make himself respond. 

When they were in bed a few hours later, Isak was glassy eyed. “I don’t know how to deal with this,” he whispered.  
Even hugged him tighter. “You have all of us. We’ll do it together.”


	64. Chapter sixty-four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Isak tries therapy, Even hates spiders

Chapter 64  
“I told you, I can’t.”  
Even sighed. It felt like he’d been sighing a lot, lately. “Isak. I want you to be happy. And I want you to feel safe and comfortable. But I think- I think one of the only ways that’ll happen is if you let yourself be uncomfortable for a minute and do this. Please. I need to see you smiling again.”  
Isak gave a weak, toothy grin. “See? I don’t- I’m not-”  
Reaching forward and taking one of his hands, Even squeezed. “Please. Just try this. For me.”   
The smaller boy stared town at the interlocked hands in his cross-legged lap. “I-” he choked, before looking back up. He looked small and scared. “Will you come with me?”  
Even had to smile because otherwise he might cry. “Of course.”

The therapist’s office wasn’t as medical as Isak was expecting. He’d been anticipating a dentist’s-office-waiting-room vibe, but instead there was more of a middle-aged-aunt’s-living-room vibe. The woman there kind of looked like a middle aged aunt, too. She was blond, shocker, and Isak worried that he’d come underdressed (could you come underdressed to these things?) because she was in a nice skirt and he was in his dirty converse and a hoodie. “You must be Isak and Even,” she said as soon as they walked in. My name is Kristen.”  
Even nodded. “I’m Even, this is Isak.”  
Smiling, she gestured for them to sit. “Have either of you ever been to therapy before?”  
“I have,” Even said immediately, “Isak hasn’t.”  
Isak didn’t know why he couldn’t make himself talk to this woman. She seemed nice enough. Thoughtful in a way that most people weren’t, judging on her profession.   
“Alright. I’m so glad you’re here. Although, I was surprised that you wanted to come as a couple. I don’t specialize in couple’s therapy.”  
Tightening his grip around Isak’s shoulders, Even shook his head. “We’re not here for that. I’m here… because Isak didn’t want to come alone.”  
Kristen nodded. “Okay. Why did you want to come exactly, Isak?”  
The younger boy tensed. She was blinking at him softly and her makeup was a little smudged. In lieu of an answer, he shrugged meekly. Kristen nodded as if she understood that, but didn’t speak. Isak felt Even start to shift beside him, presumably because he was getting ready to start talking again, get Isak off the hot seat, but the smaller boy cleared his throat. “I, um… something… somebody… tried to… attack me.”  
Kristen nodded again. Her brow furrowed. “Violently?”  
“Um… yes. Or, no. Kind of. They tried to… to… have sex with me.”  
Even took a deep breath beside him. Isak felt drained already. “I’m sorry that happened to you, Isak,” Kristen said. “I’m really, really sorry. It must have been scary.”  
Swallowing through his dry throat, Isak nodded. “It was.”  
“Do you want to talk about that? You can lead this conversation anywhere you want.”  
Isak shifted. Wasn’t she supposed to lead? “I, uh… I guess I want to talk about it. That’s why I’m here.”  
“Why did you make the decision to come?” Kristen asked.   
“Even- I wanted to get help. And Even… Even said it would help. I was- I didn’t want to come at first. I was really… scared. But… I think it’ll help.”  
“It looks like you two are very happy together.”  
Isak nodded softly. Kristen smiled. “Could you tell me what happened when you were attacked? Was Even there?”  
Pressing his lips together, Isak looked down. “I… I was at school. I’m- Even’s at university, but I’m at my last year at Nissen and I- I didn’t show up to class and my friends asked Even where I was and- Even knew that this guy was messing with me so he came but he was- it was-” Isak opened and closed his mouth a few more times but he didn’t know what to say. “Even came. He stopped it. With my friends. I had- have- a concussion. It was a worse then, so I couldn’t… stop it.”  
Even rubbed up and down his arm. Kristen looked up at them. “Isak,” she said, “I’m going to ask something of you, but you shouldn’t hesitate to tell me no. Would it be okay if we had some one-on-one time? Without Even in the room? I think you could really benefit from it.  
Even’s heartbeat sped up a little. He looked at Isak, whose tongue was stuck between his lips. A long while passed before he said anything. “Okay.” He turned to Even and nodded once, private confirmation that it really was okay, he really could go. Even nodded back.   
“I’ll be outside when you’re done,” he whispered, pressing a kiss to the top of Isak’s curls. And then he got up and left.   
Although he felt shaky leaving Isak there alone, he knew he couldn’t just stand outside the door the whole time, so he decided to leave and pick them up some lunch. There was no guarantee that Isak would be able to stomach it- just another worry on Even’s list on a million and one. By the time Isak texted him that he was ready, he had two sandwiches from their favorite lunch place and a lot of anxiety in his heart.   
“Hei,” Isak said as soon as he caught sight of Even. The older boy smiled.   
“Halla. How… how did that go?”   
Isak looked down, fiddling with his thumbs, before looking back up with a hesitant smile. “I think it was good.”  
Even almost sighed in relief. “Really?” he asked, voice breaking with hope. Isak gave another small smile.  
“Yeah. I really think… it was good, Even.”  
Even put the sandwiches down on the bench beside them and pulled Isak into his arms. “Thank you.”  
“Thank you, baby,” Isak said back. His eyes were clearer than they’d been in a long time when he pulled away. And, when they walked home, Isak’s grip on his hand felt strong.   
Later in the evening, Even was making soup for Isak, something that the younger boy had whiningly asked him to do because "My nose hurts!"   
Even couldn’t say no. Isak had actually whined at him. It felt like heaven sent gift, so he just smiled and kissed the back of the smaller boy’s hand.   
So now here he was, making soup for Isak, trying not to take too long when he turned around to get something from the fridge and promptly felt his heart stop.   
"Fuck," he breathed, high-pitched, and brought one hand to his face. He didn't want to shut his eyes because then the thing could move but he also couldn't stand to look at it and he felt mildly like he might cry?   
Even couldn't tell you how long he'd been standing there, spoon in one hand, eyes half closed and feet frozen to the tile floor, when Isak padded out. "Baby," he said, voice scratchy as he rubbed one eye. "What's taking so long?"   
Even tried to regain control over his breathing. "Hei," he whispered, turning to face Isak on shaky legs. The younger boy stared at him.  
"Hei. What's going on?"  
Smiling thinly, Even shook his head. "Nothing, angel. Go back to bed."   
Making squinty eyes, Isak looked around the room. "I'm not dumb. What's happened?"   
Even took a deep breath. With an almost trembling hand, he pointed to it.   
In the middle of the kitchen floor, there was a giant fucking spider. Or, it wasn't giant. But it was big. At least as big as a... quarter. Yeah. Which, never mind, was giant.   
"A spider?" Isak asked, staring at it. "You're afraid of them?"   
"Anyone who's not is fucking Satan," Even sputtered. Isak snorted quietly.   
"Go to our room. I'll get rid of it," the smaller boy said, grabbing one of Even's cookbooks off the counter.   
"Don't kill it?!" Even almost cried. Isak starting staring at him again.   
"You're afraid of them, why do you care?"   
"Because they're alive, Isak! They have families!"   
"Maybe," Isak shrugged, "but they don't have conscience thought or long term memory, so I don't think it'll mind."   
Even pouted. Frowned. Really did his best to act upset. But seeing Isak like this- this normal. That was making him far too happy to care about the life of a spider. "Fine. Murder it. But make it fast."   
"I'm not going to, like, torture it, Even. I'm not a fucking sadist." 

By the time a loud bang had sounded and the faucet had turned on to wet a paper towel, Even was a little more calm. "It's safe to come out," Isak shouted from the kitchen, and Even did just that.   
“Did you get it?” he squeaked. Isak nodded. “You’re not holding it?”  
At this, the smaller boy snorted. “The fuck, Even?”   
“I’m just asking.” Even walked to Isak and wrapped his arms around the younger boys waist. “Thank you for killing it.”  
Isak nodded. Even rubbed his back. “Are you… okay enough to have someone over? Like, would you maybe want to invite the boys or something? I don’t know.”  
Shrinking slightly, Isak shook his head. “I’m- I want- but-”  
“It’s okay,” Even soothed. “You’re fine, baby.”  
Isak pressed his forehead to Even’s shoulder. “Sorry,” he mumbled.   
Even felt a frown pull at his mouth. “You never have to be sorry,” he said, pulling away. Isak nodded once, eyes down, and then pressed a soft, lingering kiss to Even’s mouth.   
“I really do feel better, though, Ev. After… talking. I think I want to go back. I don’t know, it just feels… it feels like I can kind of… think about it. For real now. I don’t know.”  
Even tugged him in again. “I’m so, so happy. I’m so happy, my angel. Especially now that you’re feeling well enough to kill spiders for me again. I don’t know what I would’ve done otherwise.”  
Isak snorted into his chest. “You would’ve died.”  
“I really would have,” Even agreed.


	65. Chapter sixty-five

Chapter 65  
It felt okay, for a minute there. It almost felt too good. And turns out it was.   
“You’re here, baby, you’re okay,” Even was saying. Isak eyes were still glassy from crying but at least they were open now. “Hey. You’re right here with me.”  
Isak curled deeper into his neck. “I don’t think I can go back there.”  
“Where, sweetheart?”  
“Therapy. I don’t think I can do that again, Even.”   
“Why not? You seemed so much better today.”   
Isak held onto Even’s shirt. “It feels too real now. I can’t go back.”  
“I think it would be really good if you just gave it another try or-”  
“Can we talk about it in the morning, Even? Please?” Isak whispered, and Even couldn’t force him to stay awake and talk about things he didn’t even want to think about.   
“Okay. Okay. Just go back to sleep.”

By the time the sun was up, things seemed to be a bit better. Isak was crisscrossed in bed, Cardamom in his lap, petting her and chatting with Even as if nothing had happened last night, all bundled up in sweatpants and a sweatshirt and fifteen million blankets. “I miss everyone,” he said quietly after there had been a dull moment.   
Even stopped folding the clothes he was dealing with and put the last shirt on the pile. “Would you… when do you want to go back to school?”  
There was silence. “I don’t know.”  
Even sat down beside him. “Do you want to talk about… everything you said last night?”  
Tensing up, Isak shook his head.   
“Baby, I think you should go back to therapy. You said yesterday that it helped so much.”  
Isak rubbed his arms. “I just don’t want to.”  
“Why?”  
“I just don’t want to, Even.”   
“You have to tell me why, Is,” Even said, and he didn’t mean to sound harsh but from the way Isak reacted he might as well have slapped the younger boy. “Hey,” he quickly tried to amend. “Hey, come here. I’m so sorry. My sweet boy. I’m not mad at you, my love. I just want to know what changed.”  
Isak shrugged, blinking a few times. “I- I had a dream.”  
“Yeah,” Even agreed, because of course he remembered the crying last night.   
Leaning against Even, Isak nodded. “I was… at school. With… him. And I… I don’t know. Yesterday, she made me… explain… how I felt. And now that I have words for it- I just don’t know.”  
“But doesn’t that feel good? Having words for it?”  
Isak laced their fingers together. “It did,” he shrugged. “But then, last night… it was like… my mind was using the words… against me. Like he kept… saying them. And that’s what was so scary.”  
“How do you feel this morning?” Even asked. Isak shrugged again.   
“I don’t know. Still a little better. But… I was so scared last night.”   
“But baby… there are always going to be nightmares. You had nightmares already. If you feel at all better from therapy, then I really, really think it would be good for you to keep going. I would come with you if you want.”   
Swallowing, Isak picked at a scab on his knee. “Maybe,” he said after a minute. “Is that okay?”  
“Whatever you need is okay. I just want you to feel better,” Even comforted, scooting closer to wrap one arm around Isak’s waist and tug them both back into bed. He maneuvered them so he and Isak’s faces were a few inches away from each other. “Hi,” he whispered, leaning out and running one thumb over Isak’s bottom lip. The smaller boy nuzzled into his touch.   
“Hi,” he said back.   
“So… when do you want to go back to school, baby?”  
Isak shrugged. “I don’t know… I don’t think it’ll be easy anytime soon… so I guess this week.”  
“Are you sure?” Even asked, furrowing his brow.   
“I think so.”  
Mussing Isak’s hair slightly, Even frowned. “Are you… nervous?”  
Isak shook his head the tiniest bit. “He won’t… be there. I’m just… embarrassed.”  
“Why are you embarrassed?”  
“That stuff isn’t supposed to happen to boys, Even,” Isak rolled his eyes. Even’s frown pulled deeper.   
“You have nothing to be embarrassed about, Isak.”  
Isak shrugged and didn’t say anything after that. Some time passed before Even said, “What do you want to do today?”  
Flicking his eyes up towards the older boy, Isak smiled softly. “Let’s have the guys over,” he said. 

Half an hour later, Mahdi, Magnus and Jonas were piled on their couches. It wasn’t loud and it wasn’t crazy but it was fun and it was nice. Isak was sitting between Even’s legs, head against his chest. Mahdi was telling them some silly story, something about the stupid things that had happened while Isak was gone, and Isak was laughing. And that was all that mattered.   
“Bro, you’re coming back this week?” Magnus asked. “That’s so sick. We missed you so much.”  
Isak smiled. “I missed you guys, too.”  
“The girls missed you, too. They wouldn’t fucking stop asking about you, as if we knew anything. You were on radio silence, dude.”  
Even tightened his grip ever so slightly around Isak’s waist. He didn’t want Magnus to ruin this good moment. But Isak laughed slightly. “I bet you’re used to not getting a text back,” he said with a shrug. Even, Jonas and and Mahdi burst into oohs while Magnus sputtered indignantly.   
“What?! I have so much game. Everyone texts me back!”  
“Right, man, that’s why you’ve been complaining all week about that fine girl you met last weekend,” Mahdi laughed.   
“You’re so annoying,” Magnus pouted, and Jonas nudged his shoulder playfully.   
“It’s okay, Maggie, you’ll get there one day.”

By the time the boys were ready to leave, Isak was tired. Really tired. Like, barely-keeping-his-eyes-open tired. And, so, after being quickly tugged into the shower by Even, he snuggled into bed and he was out pretty quickly. He’d been falling asleep much more quickly, but he’d been waking up a lot more often. So Even patted down his hair and took one of his hands and whispered into his ear until he fell asleep, too.


	66. Chapter sixty-six

Chapter 66  
“Everyone will be starring,” Isak whispered, wringing his hands together. Even pulled him tighter, arm snug around his shoulders, and pressed a kiss into the side of his head.   
“I promise you’ll be okay, baby.”  
Isak shrugged softly in lieu of a response. Frowning, Even stopped and reached down. He plucked a dandelion out of the grass along the sidewalk they were making their way down. “Here,” he said, tucking it gently behind his ear.   
“What is this, Evi?” Isak almost whined, furrowing his eyebrows. He only called Even by that nickname when he was feeling particularly worried or open or something, and so Even smiled and leaned in to kiss his forehead.   
“It’s a flower for my flower.”  
“Oh my god, shut up,” Isak groaned, shoving Even away.   
“Nei. Now nobody will be staring at anything but your beautiful flower. Now you look more beautiful than ever.”  
Isak huffed. “Leave me alone,” he said as Even pulled him even closer, now spinning him around so he could tug him into his chest.   
“Never,” Even breathed. 

By the time they got to school, Even had Isak smiling and their hands were linked tightly. “The boys are gonna give you so much shit,” Even laughed about the dandelion. Isak rolled his eyes.   
“They can suck it up.”  
“They certainly can,” Even cooed as they walked over to Jonas, Magnus and Mahdi, who were standing by the front of the school yard.   
“Hey, bro,” Jonas said, fist bumping him as Even and Magnus hugged. Isak gave Mahdi a highfive, too, and, when he looked back to Even and Magnus was still in his arms, he frowned grumpily and wrapped his arm around the older boy’s shoulders.   
“What the fuck is that?” Mahdi laughed as Isak’s head was turned to look at Even. Isak flushed and rolled his eyes.   
“What does it look like, dumbass?”  
Jonas gave a squawk of laughter. “Holy shit, you have a fucking dandelion behind your ear.”  
“Let me see!” Magnus demanded, grabbing Isak’s shoulder and yanking him sideways.   
“Piss off,” Isak mumbled, trying to shrug him away.   
“Oh shit! That is so fucking cute, oh my god!”  
Even laughed and squeezed his hand a little more tightly. “He needed a little brightening up today,”   
“You’re killing me, dude. Fucking killing me,” Magnus said, shaking his head. His hair was getting long, so it hung low into his eyes.   
“Why did you use a dandelion, though? It’s a weed,” said Mahdi. “If you were really smooth you would’ve bought a fucking bouquet before he woke up this morning.”  
“No way, man,” Jonas shook his head. “The concept of paying for literal flowers, flowers that grow from the fucking ground, gives me such a migrane.”  
“Don’t have a heart attack, Jonas,” Isak said.   
“Wait, give me all the details,” said Magnus.   
“What details?” Isak asked.   
“Why are you wearing a fucking flower in your hair?”  
“Weed,” Mahdi corrected. “But, in your defense, weeds are resilient.”  
“There are no details, Magnus, Even put a dandelion behind my ear. The end,” Isak was saying.   
“No, buy why?!”  
“Because I wanted everyone to see how beautiful he is.”  
“Shut up,” Isak whined as all the other boys groaned. Even rolled his eyes. Just then, the bell rang.   
“Alright, we gotta go,” Jonas said. Isak’s smile disappeared. His grip on Even’s hand went from loose and content to deathly.   
“It’s okay, baby,” Even hummed, pulling him close. “I promise. Everything will be okay.”  
“You don’t know that,” Isak whispered back, shaking slightly. Even rubbed up and down his back.  
“I do. Because Jonas and Mahdi and Magnus and Eva and everyone else who loves you will be looking out for you.”  
Isak nodded. “When will you be done?”  
“2:30.”  
“Okay.”  
Even pulled away and looked down at him. “If anything at all happens, text me. If you need me to come get you, I will, okay?”  
Isak nodded and swung their arms back and forth. “You’ll come get me after school?”  
“Of course.”  
“Okay.”  
Even gently and slowly pressed a kiss to his forehead, and then to his mouth. “I’ll see you soon, my love,” he whispered. Isak nodded.   
“See you soon.”

As soon as Even was gone Isak was surrounded by Jonas and Mahdi and Magnus, and even though they were crowding and talking over each other, Isak couldn’t help but smile. 

“Isak!”   
The blonde boy turned around. He’d just been headed to biology when he heard the familiar voice behind him. Turning, he caught Eva in his arms before he knew what had happened. “Hey,” he breathed, stumbling back slightly.   
Eva looked up at him, hair falling back past her face. “Hi,” she breathed back, smiling in a way that reached her eyes. “I, um… I texted Even, but he said…”  
“It’s okay,” Isak nodded. Eva sighed.   
“I’m just… really glad you’re back.”   
“Yeah,” Isak sighed, nodding again. “Yeah. Me too.”

Isak was… really fucked. Missing a week of school, turns out, wasn’t easy to make up. He was jittering nervously as their teacher started explaining things and Sana was being unusually quiet next to him. When he asked for help, she only shrugged. “I’m sorry, Isak. I just… don’t have time.”  
That was unlike her. Isak wanted to ask, wanted to make her talk to him, but she had never once pried during all those months he’d been so off, and so he simply nodded. 

Isak The Man Of My Dreams Valtersen <3: Hey  
Even: Hey angel  
Even: How are you  
Isak The Man Of My Dreams Valtersen <3: I just threw up  
Even: Oh sweetie. What happened?  
Isak The Man Of My Dreams Valtersen <3: Nothing. Idk. I just ate a lot at lunch and then I had to go down that hallway and… idk. Started freaking out.   
Even: Let me come get you please  
Isak The Man Of My Dreams Valtersen <3: No, no, I’m fine now.   
Even: Are you sure? I will come right now.  
Isak: Yes. I just wanted to let you know  
Even: Takk baby<3  
Even: I’ll pick up some crackers and juice and popsicles and soup on the way home  
Even: and oranges  
Even: and that tea you like  
Isak The Man Of My Dreams Valtersen <3: Jesus you don’t have to blow our whole budget because I got sick once  
Even: of course I do  
Even: anything for you baby  
Isak The Man Of My Dreams Valtersen <3: hush   
Isak The Man Of My Dreams Valtersen <3: I’m fine, okay?  
Isak The Man Of My Dreams Valtersen <3: don’t worry please  
Even: of course I’ll worry. Try to take it easy for the rest of the day  
Isak The Man Of My Dreams Valtersen <3: I will  
Even: Okay good  
Even: I love you  
Isak The Man Of My Dreams Valtersen <3: I love you too

Even: Hey  
Jonas: hey bro  
Even: Did Isak tell you he got sick?  
Jonas: what?  
Jonas: no  
Jonas: when?  
Even: Just a little bit ago  
Jonas: shit  
Jonas: is he okay?  
Jonas: I’ll go find him right now  
Jonas: is he in class?  
Even: yeah, but don’t worry. Just keep an eye out for him, okay?  
Jonas: of course

“Hi, babe,” Isak said, smiling up at Even. Even pushed back his hair and planted a kiss on his forehead.   
“Hei, baby.”   
They linked hands and Isak swung them back and forth. “I missed you,” Isak whispered.  
“I missed you, too.”  
“Let’s go home.”

Things got easier after that. Not by much. Not all at once. But being around people, happy, bright people, started to make the burden less heavy.   
On Tuesday morning, Isak woke up to the smell of waffles. “Good morning, Is,” Even said as soon as he pattered out.   
“Hei,” Isak croaked, rubbing at his eyes. “Why are you up so early?”  
“I wanted to make you breakfast.”  
“How sweet,” Isak said raspily, leaning his chest against Even’s back.   
“Don’t fall asleep again, baby.”  
“Fuck off, I don’t do that,” Isak mumbled, pressing gentle kisses into the back of Even’s neck.   
“Okay,” Even agreed sarcastically. After a minute, he spun Isak around to face him and planted a kiss to Isak’s waiting mouth. “Good morning.”  
“Good morning.”  
“Come here,” Even instructed, pushing him towards the counter. Isak hopped up on it and tugged Even between his legs for a second kiss.   
“Maybe I should make you wear a flower crown everyday.”  
“I would break up with you.”  
Even pulled away, mock-offended. “You would never.”  
And Isak, being too sleepy to argue much, could only agree. 

“Since when do you even do yoga?”  
“Since my sister wanted me to.”  
Isak laughed and layed his head beside Jonas’s in the bed. “Was it fun?”  
“Yeah, I guess. Tons of hot chicks. That was fun.”  
“I bet.”  
Jonas rolled over slightly to look at Isak. “So how are you, man?”  
Isak shrugged. “I’m okay.”  
“Yeah?”  
“Yeah.”  
Just then, Even got home, whipping open the door to the apartment with a dramatic, “I brought your bagels!”  
Isak rolled his eyes and sat up as Jonas laughed. “Thank you,” he called back. “We’re in the bedroom.”  
“Halla, Jonas,” Even said, walking in. Then he smiled and added, “Halla, baby,” with a kiss to the top of Isak’s head as he sat down beside them. “So, what’s up?”  
“Jonas just got back from yoga.”  
“Oh, nice. I used to do yoga with my parents.”  
“See, Is, it’s not that strange.”  
“I’m just saying I thought only middle aged moms did yoga,” Isak shook his head. Even rolled his eyes.   
“Don’t comply to stereotypes, baby.”  
Pouting, Isak turned away. “Well, Jonas brought his gross mat here, so now the whole room smells like ass.”  
Even laughed. “I didn’t smell anything.”  
“You can’t smell, Even,” Isak sighed dramatically, falling back onto the mattress with a huff. Jonas bent over to grab the mat.   
“It doesn’t even smell, he’s crazy.”  
“Ugh, get that thing away from here,” Isak sputtered, turning to hide his face in the pillow. Jonas threw the mat of top of him and he shrieked, springing out of bed. Jonas picked it up and started following him around the room with it, much to Isak’s very audible annoyance, but before long, he had them both wrapped up in it.   
“We’re a burrito,” he laughed in Isak’s face, slightly out of breath from chasing his friend around. “Even, take a picture.”  
Even chuckled and obliged, grabbing Jonas’s phone off of the pillow and opening the camera, snapping a few quick pictures. 

“Hey, Sana.”  
“Halla.”  
Isak stepped aside and let his biology buddy into the apartment, Even right behind him. The older boy had to leave for work, though, and so he was rushing around looking for his keys as Isak elt Sana in and started to get set up. He’d been surprised when she’d texted, asking if he still needed help in bio, because she’d really been icing him out lately. He figured maybe that conversation in the stairwell had helped things. On his way out, Isak stopped him and asked if he could move the laundry to the dryer, and somehow they ended up arguing about Even’s sense of smell again. Isak was still mid-argument when Even’s smile- that smile, oh my god- grew a little bit wider and he said, “If it’s so important to you, I’ll do it.” Isak smiled, too.   
“Yeah?”  
“Yeah.”

Of course Even messed up the laundry anyway, so turns out Isak had to go do it anyway. He didn’t really mind. 

“So… I was making tea for Sana, and, when I came back, she was looking at my computer.”  
Even looked up from his book. He furrowed his brow. “Hm.”  
“I asked her about it and she said she just needed to wifi, but… I don’t know, it felt kind of weird.”  
“Don’t you trust her?” Even asked, setting the book aside.   
“Well, yeah, of course, but… I don’t know, something felt off. She’s been off recently.”  
“Well what would she want from your computer.”  
Isak stared at his lap for a while before shrugging. “I don’t know.”  
“Hey.” Even took his hand. “I’m sure she’ll tell you if she needs you. And I’m sure she wasn’t messing with your computer.”  
Isak nodded. Then he crawled over to the other end of the couch, where Even was sitting, and leaned his head on his shoulder. “Hey, baby?”  
“Yeah?”  
“Do you know what today is?”  
“Hm?”  
“This is the day we met. Last year.”  
At this, Even looked down at him and smiled. “Really?”  
“Yeah. I asked Vilde… when she had the first kose meeting.”  
“Yeah?”  
“Yeah.”  
Even blinked slowly before leaning forward and pressing a kiss to Isak’s mouth. “Happy anniversary then, baby.”  
Isak grinned up at him. “Happy anniversary, Evi.”


	67. Chapter sixty-seven

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hallloooo!!! I am p excited for what's about to happen in the show... this chap mostly follows Even, ma boi. Anyway I, too, am stressed for that mock exam, so it makes an apperence (spelling?)

Chapter 67  
“Baby.”  
“Yes?”  
“Isak.”  
“What?”  
“Can you stop moving at look at me?”  
“Hm?” Isak finally stopped, snapping his attention to Even. “Sorry?”  
“Isak, take a deep breath,” Even instructed, walking over and taking the shorter boy’s hands. “Okay? You are going to be fine.”  
Isak shook his head, flustered. “Nei, I’m going to fail and then I'm not going to get into university. You know, I don’t even really care anymore, I’ve accepted it.”  
“Listen to me,” Even said, looking into Isak’s pretty green eyes. “You are going to be fine. You will not fail this. Okay?”  
“But I’m not even a fraction of how prepared I should be, I need to review-”  
“Nothing. You’ve reviewed it all a million times, okay? And you’ve emptied our coffee pot. You need to relax and sleep, okay? That’s the only thing that will help you right now.”  
Practically buzzing, Isak blinked a few times. “I- but-”  
Even shushed him with a soft kiss and then started rubbing gentle circles over his temples with his thumbs. “Breathe, baby.”  
Isak let out a trembly sigh. “Let’s shower, okay, angel?” asked Even.  
“Okay.”  
Even rubbed his arms up and down. “Yeah?”  
“Yeah.”  
Taking one of Isak’s hands, Even lead him into the bathroom. “Come on, sweetheart,” he mumbled into Isak’s neck. He gently tugged the smaller boy’s shirt over his head and then turned on the water. “Here, get in,” he ordered, pressing a kiss to the back of Isak’s ear. He nipped at it, making the younger boy sigh and shut his eyes.  
“Even,” he sighed, taking both of Even’s hands from behind his waist, rubbing over his knuckles. Even started peppering kisses along Isak’s neck and got them both undressed and lead them into the shower.  
“Are you okay, sweetheart?” Even hummed as he grabbed the soap. Isak sighed again, not responding. “I mean, I know you’re stressed with this mock exam and catching up on everything else, but… are you really okay?”  
Isak nodded silently. “I’m just… trying to… focus on something else. Like, I’m not trying to… ignore it, but it’s good to have something else to think about.”  
“Steven Hawking on Red Bull?” Even asked with a little amusement in his voice.  
Isak groaned. “Does Sana send you reports on me?”  
Laughing, Even squeezed Isak’s sides. “Nei, I just happened to text her asking if she knew when you were getting home- since somebody wasn’t responding- and she said she didn’t know when Steven Hawking on Red Bell was getting back.”  
“Ugh, great,” Isak groaned.  
“Angel, I know you like having something to focus on, and I love that you work so hard, but you’re practically shaking. Can you please, please try to relax tonight?”  
Isak nodded slightly, head hanging a little. Even tugged at the hair on his nap and started nosing at his shoulder. Melting a little bit, Isak reached behind him and threaded his fingers through Even’s hair. Even started to gently suck a hickey onto the back of his neck, hands lingering over his hips, thumbs rubbing circles over his lower belly. Isak let out a quiet moan, lacing their fingers together, and smiled as Even spun him around, leaning him back against the wall and holding him up by the dimples of his back. He pressed a quiet kiss to Isak’s mouth, gently parting it with his tongue, and drew Isak in closer to him by the waist. The smaller boy reached around his neck and pulled away, making brief eye contact with Even.  
The older boy stared into his eyes, and reached up to smooth down his eyebrows. He searched Isak’s face for any sign of hesitation for what they could both feel was coming, partially from Isak’s growing hardness and from the heat between them. “Yeah?” he asked.  
Isak nodded. “Yeah,” he whispered back. 

Even pulled Isak further on top of him, brushing his hands through the smaller boy’s now mostly dry hair. He ran one thumb under Isak’s eye to catch the tear that was welling there and pressed a kiss to his forehead. “I love you,” Isak whispered, breath warm against Even’s bare chest, and the older boy sighed.  
“I love you, too.”

“Are you okay?” Even asked. Isak nodded.  
“I don’t care about those girls anyway.”  
“But people might be mad. It was a pretty horrible thing of Sana to do. People might treat you differently.”  
Shrugging, Isak wrapped his arms around Even’s neck. “I’ll be okay. The boys know and you know, that’s all that matters. Why should I give a shit if a bunch of random girls give me dirty looks?”  
Even pecked him gently. “I’m proud of you. It’s a really nice thing to do, taking the fall for Sana.”  
“She doesn’t need more on her plate,” Isak said. Even frowned slightly.  
“Neither do you, baby.”  
Wrinkling his nose briefly, Isak shook his head. “It’s different. She needs people on her side right now.”  
Even smiled warmly and pressed a kiss to Isak’s forehead. “Okay. You’re so good. Now get going, you’re gonna be late.”  
Nodding, Isak started to walk away, but Even tugged him back in for another brief kiss, earning a mock glare. “What? You’re wearing a denim jacket, I can’t help it,” Even defended, making Isak roll his eyes. 

“Hi!”  
“Hey,” Even said, smiling at May as she sat down. “How are you?”  
“Good. Really, really tired from all the exams right now, but good. You?”  
“I’m good,” Even nodded. “What are you doing after this?”  
“I don’t know, lunch?”  
“Wanna join me, then?”  
“Sure,” May nodded, tracing her notes with one hand. “Can we get pizza? I’m dying for it.”  
“Sounds perfect,” Even agreed.  
An hour and five jokes about their professor’s voice later, the two were making their way downtown. “Ugh, it’s fucking freezing,” May complained, rubbing up and down her arms. “I’m so fucking tired of winter already.”  
“I love winter!” Even argued, pretending to be offended. May stopped in her tracks.  
“Oh, no. I’m so sorry. This isn’t going to work,” she said, shaking her head. “I can’t be with somebody who loves winter. I’m, like, morally required to never speak to you again.”  
Laughing, Even shrugged. “What can I say? The colors, the smell, I just love it all.”  
“What colors?” May asked incredulously as they walked into the pizza place. “Grey?”  
“Blue, grey, silver, light purples, and so many shades of white,” Even shook his head.  
“White only has one shade!”  
“Ehem, tell that to every bride ever! Seriously, white has so many shades! Eggshell, pearl, powder, ivory-”  
“I didn’t know you were an interior designer,” laughed May.  
“Maybe I will be, who knows? But winter has a million shades of white. Snow itself has a million shades of white, then the sky is such a blinding white and the ice and-”  
“Okay, okay, winter’s not completely horrible,” May cut in. “You’ve convinced me. Now can we order please?”  
“You’re just like Isak, he despises winter,” said Even, and May lit up.  
“That was a new record!” she said. Even furrowed his eyebrows.  
“Of what?”  
“Not mentioning Isak! You haven’t brought him up all day! For a minute there I thought he’d died and you were in denial or something.”  
Laughing, Even shook his head. “He’s not dead. Although he might as well be with all the stress he puts on himself.”  
“What do you mean?”  
“Let’s just say he once cried because he got a 6- in a class he’s always had a 6 in last marking period,” Even replied, raising his eyebrows. May opened her mouth.  
“Serr? I did not peg him for such a nerd.”  
“Oh, he’s the nerdiest. He literally thinks he won’t get into university everytime he gets below a five. Plus his eyes have been bothering him and he thinks he needs glasses, so then he’ll fully metamorphosize into his nerd form.”  
“He would look so good in glasses!”  
“Tell that to him,” Even laughed. “He does not like the idea.”  
“He’d look sexy smart,” May nodded. “Like a high power CEO hooking up with his hot intern or something.”  
“I’m insulted that I’m just an intern in this scenario! And Isak would never be a CEO!”  
“Fine, then… a sexy, highly-acclaimed surgeon or something secretly seeing a world-famous director, despite their different worlds,” May nodded.  
“Different worlds?”  
“Ja, one works until midnight, comes home to an empty flat, he’s rich and successful, but, somewhere along fixing all those hearts, his own went cold. Then the other is internationally adored and brings home a guy or girl every night, he’s charming and funny and everyone loves him, he seems like he's got it all figured out, but really he’s just another lost soul looking for home. They meet and the surgeon hates the director for his flashy lifestyle and his cockiness, and the director thinks the surgeon is snobby and rude and condescending, but they get to know each other and they end up falling for each other, enemies-to-lovers style,” May rambled excitedly. Even laughed.  
“All this from Isak getting glasses?”  
“I’m just saying, it would make a good story. Maybe you’ll make it your first movie. You’d have to give me credit, though.”  
“I would?” Even chuckled, making May nod. “Well,” he continued, “I think I like this story better: Two boys meet in high school. They’ve both had a hard time recently, but they know there’s something between them right away. They have a ridiculously cheesy first kiss thanks to the hotter, older one, and eventually they fall in love, move in together, get a dog and a cat. After a while they get married, have a daughter or two, adopt more pets, and live happily ever after.”  
He hadn’t noticed when May stopped laughing and starting staring at him more intensely. “Seriously?” she asked after a moment.  
“What?” Even asked back.  
“You wanna marry Isak?”  
Drawing in his brows, Even nodded. “Of course. Why, did it seem-”  
“No! No, I didn’t think you didn’t wanna marry him, just… you seem so sure. So ready. And, like… kids and stuff, too.”  
Even shrugged, toying with the pizza they’d finally gotten. “I mean…yeah. I love him. And, yeah, I’m sure. I mean,” he waved his hand around, showing off the ring they both wore. “I’m not ready to get married tomorrow or anything, but it’s definitely him. Someday. Preferably kind of soonish.”  
May nodded dreamily. “And a daughter or two?”  
Chuckling, Even nodded back. “And a daughter or two. That part’s his idea.”  
“Well, I think it’s gonna happen just like you said,” May said, smiling. Even smiled back.  
“Me too.”

“Baby?” Even called, walking in and kicking off his shoes. Isak was asleep on the bed, curled up around Cardamom with his jacket and snapback still on. Smiling, Even walked to him and pushed back his hair gently before bending over to press a soft kiss to the side of his head. Isak hummed contently in his sleep and Even walked to the table, setting down his things and taking out his laptop, starting on some homework. By the time it was evening, he was hungry, so he stood up and started on dinner. While the food was in the oven, he walked back to Isak and shook him away. “Sweetheart, gotta get up,” he said. Isak whined softly, pressing his face into the pillows. Chuckling, Even layed down beside him. Cardamom glared at him with one eye before getting up and padding off of the bed. Isak harrumphed and wiggled closer to Even to replace her warmth.  
“Hei,” Even whispered, playing with the stray curls poking out from under his boy’s hat.  
“Nei,” Isak replied, shutting his eyes against Even’s chest.  
“You gotta get up or you won’t sleep tonight,” Even reminded him.  
“Whatever. I’ll just take those fancy pills you got me.”  
“Melatonin?” Even laughed. “Baby, those are hardly fancy. They’re not even prescription and they definitely haven’t worked in the past.”  
“Whatever,” Isak groaned again. “I’m so comfy.”  
“But I’m making your favorite,” Even coaxed, earning one eye cracked open.  
“Really?”  
“Really.”  
“Lapskaus?”  
“Ja.”  
Smiling, Isak curled deeper into him. “Maybe I’ll get up then.”  
“Maybe?”  
“Maybe. What else have you got?”  
Stroking Isak’s side, Even considered. “Your choice of what to watch?”  
“Hmm.”  
“We can crack into that good beer you like… and maybe later I’ll make you feel good, baby? Is that enough incentive?”  
Nodding, Isak pushed away from him. “That’s enough,” he said, rolling off of the bed and stretching. “I’ll go feed Baz and my baby while you cook,” he yawned, then started padding towards their food. Even followed to the kitchen. 

Isak chose to watch some shitty comedy but the soup was good and the beer was good and the blowjob was really good. By the time it was getting really late, they were both pretty tired. “How were things today?” Even whispered softly.  
Isak shrugged. “Fine. Pretty much normal. Got some dirty looks, but nothing I’m not used to.”  
Frowning, Even swiped at his hair. “What about the mock-exam?”  
Again, Isak shrugged. But this time he was smiling.


	68. Chapter sixty-eight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Isak and Even's lazy morning.... plus the crash guest!

Chapter 68  
“Good morning, baby.”  
“Good morning, Evy.”  
“Good morning, boys!”  
Isak groaned, rolling over in bed to look down over the side. “Good morning, Mags.”  
Magnus was laying on his back on the floor, smiling. “I’m hungover,” he said cheerily.   
“You don’t sound too mad about it,” Even commented, leaning over Isak.   
Sitting up, Magnus shrugged. “Who cares? Coffee, advil and a shower will make it go away, and it’s a beautiful day. We should do something.”  
Isak huffed. “We let you crash here, you’re not taking away our whole day, too.”  
Magnus pouted, making Even laugh. “Come on, Is, can’t we keep him?”  
“Ugh. Whatever. You two can hang out, I’m going back to sleep.”  
He curled up into the pillows. Even rolled his eyes. “If you wanna go shower, Mags, you can. Just don’t use Isak’s hair products, he’ll get grumpy.”  
“Huh! You mean, like, my shampoo? Because I’m pretty sure every other hair product in there is yours!” Isak huffed from his position buried in bedding. Magnus started to hop up.   
“So… can I use the shampoo or not?”  
“Use it, whatever. Use the whole bottle for all I care,” Isak grumbled.   
“Awesome!” Mags exclaimed, walking towards the bathroom. Isak sighed and burrowed himself deeper into the bed, making Even click his tongue and smooth back his hair.   
“Come on, let’s get breakfast going.”  
“Nei,” Isak groaned.   
“Okay… I’ll start it then.” Even hopped out of bed, leaving Isak alone and colder than before. The smaller boy let out an angry little noise at this, tugging the comforter back over his shoulders. It wasn’t long before he drifted back to sleep.   
When Magnus emerged from the shower, hair flopped over his face like a wet dog, Even had gotten eggs and coffee ready to eat. Isak was snoring softly. “Hei,” Magnus whispered.   
“Halla,” Even replied, passing him a plate. “How was your shower?”  
“Good. Still have a headache.”  
“There’s advil in that drawer,” Even told him. Magnus thanked him and walked to the drawer Even had nodded towards. “So, how are you?” the older boy asked.   
“Everything’s good. Did you hear about the girl’s new bus, though?”  
“Yeah. That’s pretty cool.”  
“Yeah… their friends are cool. Those guys. Now that we weren’t pounding each other, they’re actually interesting.”  
Even nodded, smiling down at his coffee. “Yeah, they’re good guys.”  
“You all used to be friends, right?”  
“Yeah, back at bakka.”  
“And everything’s chill now?”  
“Yeah. Elias texted me that he was going to the party… I don’t know. Neither of us wanted things to be weird anymore.”  
“That’s good, man. I’m glad. They’re really cool. Like, super cool.” Even nodded, laughing a little at Magnus’s enthusiasm. The younger boy fiddled with his mug before continuing, “So, like, you must all have the same interests, yeah?”   
“Um,” Even shrugged, “not really.”  
“Yeah, but, I mean… they’re really cool guys. You must have a lot of fun with each other, right?” Magnus stared at him with wide eyes. Even started to realize what was going on.   
“We do have fun,” he nodded. “Why?”  
“Oh, I don’t know. Just wondering. Do you think you’re gonna… start hanging out with them a lot now that you’ve reconnected?”  
Smiling, Even shook his head. “Maggie, are you worried I’m going to ditch you guys?”  
“Nei! I mean, its not like I’m sitting here thinking you’re about to, like, run off and move in with one of them or anything! Just,” Magnus made some vague hand gestures, flustered. “They are very cool guys.”  
“They are very cool guys,” Even agreed. “But I’m not going anywhere. Who else will buy you guys beer?”  
“I’ll be able to, soon,” they heard Isak mumble from the bed.   
“Aw, baby, you’re awake?” asked Even. Isak snorted.  
“Hard to sleep with you two screaming.”  
“We were not screaming!” Magnus said indignantly.   
“Whatever,” Isak said. “Just take it outside or something.”  
“Okay, sweetie,” Even said, standing and nodding Magnus towards the balcony.   
Isak sighed and curled deeper in bed, rolling his eyes slightly as he heard Magnus quip, “I have no idea how you call that sweet,” as the door shut.   
Finally. Finally it was quiet. Isak stretched, basking in the warmth of the bed, and pulled Even’s pillow to his stomach. It was so peaceful. Before long, he dozed off again, limbs heavy and mind blank. 

“Jesus, how long is he going to sleep?” Magnus asked as he and Even peered through the balcony door. At this point it was nearing noon and Isak hadn’t moved in a few hours. And Magnus really had to pee.   
“I have no idea. I’m telling you, just go in. He won’t wake up. And he probably should, soon, anyway,” Even shrugged, scrolling through his phone.   
“Ugh. Fine. But I’m telling him you told me to if he gets mad.”  
Laughing, Even nodded. “That’s fine, Mags.”  
Sliding open the door, Magnus tiptoed through their tiny apartment. Even sat out for a few more minutes before following him, clearing up the dishes from breakfast and getting ready to make a new pot of coffee for when Isak woke up. Which he seriously should. By the time Magnus came back, it was actually noon and, so, Even asked him to please get Isak out of bed.   
“Alright, your fault if he kills me,” Magnus shrugged. Even nodded and kept busy in the kitchen. 

Creeping up to the bed, Magnus waited until he was close enough before pouncing on Isak. He grabbed at his friend’s wrists, expecting him to wake up with an wind-blown huff and a lot of annoyance. But, when Isak’s eyes did fly open, they were wide with fear. “What that fuck!?” he screeched, and Magnus immediately let go. Isak scrambled to sit up, lowering his head into his hands and breathing shakily. Magnus felt horrible. “Shit, man, I’m so sorry, I wasn’t- I didn’t-”  
Looking up, Isak shook his head. His mouth fell open a little and, for a split second, Magnus was sure he’d never forgive him. But then Isak slugged him in the shoulder.   
“Oi!” Magnus squeaked, rubbing where Isak’s fist had hit pretty hard. The curly haired boy lowered his head again and let out a soft laugh.   
“What the fuck, man?” he asked again. Magnus laughed, very hesitantly, too.   
“I’m such a dickhead,” he said. Isak nodded.   
“That you are.”  
“Are you, like, okay?”  
Shrugging, Isak looked around for a shirt to pull on. “I’ve woken up better ways. What time is it, anyway?”   
“Noon.”  
“Ugh,” Isak groaned, finally moving to get out of bed. Even swung around from the kitchen at that moment.   
“Good morning again, sleepy.”  
“Good morning,” Isak yawned. “I heard something about you moving in with your bakka friends?”   
Laughing, Even shook his head. “I would at least tell you before Mags.”  
“I don’t know,” Isak shrugged, “you two are pretty sneaky.”  
“Yeah, we’re all moving in together,” Magnus nodded.   
“Maybe then you’ll finally figure out how gay sex works,” Isak said, smirking. Magnus squawked in offence.   
“By the way,” he added upon recovery, “Eskild posted all over your instagram last night.”  
Groaning, Isak fished his phone out of the sheets and opened instagram. “What the hell,” he mumbled, opening a text to Eskild. 

Isak: stop ruining my reputation with corny photos  
Eskild: says the little boy who openly used the word peeps online!  
Eskild: anyway, how are you baby jesus?  
Isak: fine fine  
Isak: did you have fun last night? Eva’s story looked crazy  
Eskild: yessss what a partay  
Eskild: you should’ve stayed  
Isak: too tired  
Isak: party was fun tho  
Eskild: and so many cute boys!  
Eskild: not that you’re on the market  
Eskild: mr I found the love of my life on the first try  
Isak: haha, sorry not sorry  
Eskild: sana never told me her brother and all his friends were cute  
Isak: haha  
Eskild: too bad sana’s got a thing for yousef, he is such a hottie

Isak stared at the screen for a beat too long before typing, “WHAT?!!!”

Eskild:... whoops  
Eskild: I thought it was common knowledge!   
Eskild: i didn’t think she’d confide in me and Linn of all people  
Eskild: especially linn  
Isak: Linn is your best friend  
Eskild: but she’s not a great confidant   
Isak: whatever, I can’t believe Sana likes Yousef!  
Eskild: honey, did you see the way they were looking at each other?  
Eskild: do you have eyes?  
Isak: that makes me so happy!  
Eskild: aw, look at you, caring about everybody now that you’re not mulling around in the closet  
Isak: haha shut up, I wasn’t that bad  
Eskild: true  
Eskild: you were always a softie  
Isak: whatever guru<3  
Isak: can I tease Sana about this or is it confidential  
Eskild: don’t rat me out!!  
Eskild: don’t you know anything?!!  
Isak: okay okay! Chill   
Eskild: don’t scare me like that then  
Isak: sorry   
Isak: I’ll just get her to open up to me about it and then tease her  
Eskild: hiss hiss  
Isak: ?  
Eskild: snakey  
Isak: haha. Don’t worry I won’t meddle. Gotta go, Magnus is whining that I’m neglecting him

“Don’t send him that!” Magnus exclaimed as Isak hit send. “Now he’ll think I’m some little toddler!”  
“He already thinks that, Mags,” Isak shrugged, tossing his phone down.   
Magnus huffed. Then he looked back up tentatively. “So… what’s Linn’s deal?”  
Isak narrowed his eyes. “Linn’s deal?” he repeated.   
“Ja, you know… she’s very pretty, Isak.”  
Face reddening, Isak started to laugh. “Nei,” he said simply.  
“Nei?”  
“Nei. Linn is off limits to you. And, like, everyone else ever.”  
“Why? It’s not like I wanna marry her, I’m just asking what’s her deal! She’s pretty!”  
“She’s very pretty and she’s three years older than you and you’ve talked about once and she spends the majority of her day asleep. And I don’t think she’s had a boyfriend in years. And I don’t think she wants one.”  
“How would you know?! Nobody likes being single!”  
“So not true! Jonas and Mahdi are totally content being single. Eskild loves being single. Not everybody is as desperate as you.”  
“Whatever. Sorry for asking a totally innocent question.” Even came out of the kitchen again, sitting next to the other two boys.   
“What innocent question?”  
“He wants to hook up with Linn.”  
Smiling, Even raised his eyebrows. “Linn? Our Linn?”  
“She’s hot!”  
“That’s true.”  
“Even!?” Isak protested. “Don’t encourage him?!”   
“I’m not saying they should hook up! But it’s true that Linn is very beautiful!”  
“Magnus, have you even spoken to her?” Isak asked, turning his attention back to his friend. Magnus flushed.   
“Um...not directly.”  
Rolling his eyes, Isak flopped back in bed. “Well, I’ll have you know that Linn is also very interesting and can be funny and she’s really tough and cool. If you liked her for any of those reasons, I wouldn’t be so weirded out because I couldn’t blame you. But you just wanting to hook up because you think she’s hot,” he shivered. “If you knew her I’d get it, but thinking about her like that… ugh, she’s like my older sister.”  
“Aw, look at you, talking about appreciating a girl for her mind over her body. You’re growing up so much!” Even cooed.   
“Ugh,” Isak groaned again, lazily hitting him with a pillow.  
And that is the story of how the three most childish boys Oslo ended up in a pillow fight at !2:30 on a Saturday afternoon.


	69. Chapter sixty-nine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Isak must babysit a neighbor

Chapter 69  
“Hello?” Isak said, swinging open the door. On the other side was Lise, a woman who lived below them with her son, Jon. She was really nice and cool and she let Isak and Even use her washing machine while there’s was getting delivered. “Oh! Hei! Um, how are you?”  
Lise smiled up at him. “I’m good! How are you? How’s Even?”  
“We’re great,” Isak nodded, a little anxious about her pop in. Lise was still smiling warmly, though, so that helped things.  
“Great. So, um… I was wondering if there was any way you could watch Jonny tomorrow after he gets home from school? I’m so sorry to ask, but I’m really in a jam and nobody else is around… it would only be for a little while and I would pay you. If not I understand, you have schoolwork to do, too, but I would really appreciate it.”  
Isak stared at her. He really liked Lise and Jon seemed fine, like any other seven year old boy, but nothing, absolutely nothing in this world, appealed to Isak less than babysitting a bratty kid on a Friday night. Lise seemed to note his hesitation and nervously added, “It would only be for two hours.”  
“Oh, um…” the blond boy swung the door back and forth, trying to come up with a reasonable excuse. But Lise was so sweet and helpful and she’d said she was in a jam and Isak knew he would feel like a real ass if he made something up and left her without options, so he finally stuttered, “Oh, um, sure! I mean, yeah, sure. When… when would it be?”  
The relief that flooded Lise’s face was enough to make Isak feel like this was worth it, but he was sure he wouldn’t feel that way tomorrow. “Thank you so much!” she gushed. “Just from 15.30 to 17.30. Does that work?”  
“Yeah, that works fine,” Isak nodded.  
“Great,” the woman nodded back, and she sounded so genuinely grateful. “Great, thank you so much. I’ll leave instructions for food and my number and stuff on the counter, and, um, here,” she quickly grabbed her purse and started fishing around until she found their spare key. “Here,” she repeated, holding it out for him. “His friend’s mom will drop him off outside of the building tomorrow, and I’ll leave a check on the counter, too. Thank you so much again.”  
“It’s really no problem,” argued Isak, shaking his head. Lise sighed, tucking some hair behind her ear, before reaching up and pulling him into a brief hug.  
“Even can come, too,” she said as she pulled away.  
“Alright,” agreed Isak. “Sounds good.”

By the time Even got home, Isak was getting really nervous. Because what on earth did he know about little kids? Especially boys? I mean, he should probably know more about boys considering he was one, but it wasn’t like little boys had ever liked him when he was little! Besides Jonas he hadn’t had any friends until fifth or sixth grade! Admittedly he didn’t have long hair anymore and he wasn’t quite as skinny, but this kid could still find things to hate about him.  
Jesus, get a hold of yourself, Isak thought. You’re scared of being bullied by a kid ten years younger than you?  
Just then, the front door swung open, and in walked Even, tall as ever. “Hey,” he said, shrugging off his jacket and hanging it up. “What’s up?”  
Isak looked up at him from the couch and shook his head. “I’m fucked.”  
Laughing, Even walked to him and laid down, resting his head in the younger boys lap and smiling upside down at him. Isak rolled his eyes and immediately started running his fingers through Even’s hair. “Why are you fucked, baby?”  
“I agreed to babysit for Jon.”  
“You what?!”  
“Lise came over and she said she was in a jam and she’s been so nice so I couldn’t say no! But what do I know about little boys? He’s going to hate me and then we’re going to have to move because I can’t live in the same building as a seven year old who rejected me.”  
“He’s not going to reject you,” Even chuckled. Scoffing, Isak let both hands sit limp over Even’s face.  
“Fuck you. You don’t know that. Everyone loves you anyway.”  
“Not everyone loves me, sweetheart. Just smart people.”  
“Fuck you,” Isak repeated, shifting to stand up. “Can you come help?”  
“After you treat me so rudely you expect me to help?” Even laughed, falling back against the couch.  
“Even, I’m going to die. You’re going to be arrested for manslaughter if you don’t help me babysit this child. Or plain murder. When I crawl back to the apartment after successfully keeping Jon alive, I will collapse in the middle of the floor and, slowly, my heart beat will stop, and I’ll be clutching a note that says ‘It was Even.’”  
“Now you’re framing me?” Even asked, getting up, too. Isak walked to the kitchen and started doing the dishes, pouting.  
“It’s not framing if it’s true.”  
“Well, I wish I could come with you, but I’m working all afternoon tomorrow.”  
Isak groaned and plunged his hands into the sink, loudly clanging their plates together as he piled them into the dishwasher. Rolling his eyes, Even came up behind the younger boy and wrapped both arms around his waist, settling his chin on Isak’s shoulder. “Just think about it like this,” he mumbled, “now there will be a child in this world who likes you more than he likes me.”  
“That’s assuming it goes well,” Isak replied. Even smirked and kissed his cheek.  
“Of course it will,” he said sweetly, and then he bounced off towards the table. “I’ve gotta do some work.”  
Isak huffed. He continued to angrily do dishes until they were all done, and then he just loitered around, doing other small chores and eventually crawling into bed, pants still on, and pulling out his phone. “What are we doing for dinner?” he asked eventually. Even hummed over his laptop.  
“Takeout? I don’t know, I’m too busy to cook.”  
“I can cook,” Isak replied, scrolling through instagram. He saw that Vilde had posted a picture of her and Eva and liked it quickly before tossing the phone aside.  
“I don’t want another tea disaster,” Even chuckled, eyes still glued to his screen. Isak let out an offended noise.  
“I can follow a recipe, Even. There just happens not to be a convenient recipe for how to make tea without a kettle.”  
“It’s called a microwave, baby.”  
“I know that now.”  
Even rolled his eyes fondly as Isak began to move around the kitchen. “Frozen pizza? Or… we have some sort of canned stuff…”  
“I thought you were going to cook, Is,” Even laughed. From the clanging in the kitchen, he could guess his comment wasn’t appreciated.  
“I’m sorry, master chef, did you want lamb chops? Or maybe a nice steak?”  
“Filet mignon, please.”  
There was more clatter but Isak didn’t reply, so Even went back to his work. Some time passed, and after the microwave beeped for a third time, the older boy finally had to go investigate. He walked in to see pasta boiling and two bowls of reheated frozen veggies- peas and broccoli- and what looked to be a poorly sliced pile of zucchini. “What’s all this?” Even asked, pleased.  
“Pasta,” Isak shrugged in response.  
“With vegetables?”  
“Yes, Even. We’re adults here.”  
“I knew I was, but I wasn’t so sure about you. You hate vegetables.”  
Isak mumbled something inaudible, moving around to check the pasta.  
“What was that?” Even asked, walking to Isak and laying one hand on Isak’s hip.  
“I said… I said they might be growing on me.”  
“Oh? My big boy is eating his veggies. So grown up.”  
Isak leaned into Even’s touch but huffed in offence. “Well, somebody has to be.”  
Instead of replying, Even pressed a few kisses into the back of Isak’s shoulder.  
Once the food was ready, they brought it out and ate slowly. Isak poured basically an entire bag of shredded cheese on his, earning the eyebrows from Even. “Not too grown up, I see.”  
“Whatever. At least I’m drinking water and not pepsi.”  
“Pepsi max,” Even replied, popping the Ps, because he thought it was fun to say, much to Isak’s annoyance, but now he was in a good mood, so he smiled.  
“Yes, pepsi max. Are you trying to remind me of Sara? Do you want me to go back to her?”  
“Yeah, I’m bored of you. Sara needs to take you back or else you’ll be all alone.”  
Isak chuckled into his pasta. “I don’t think Sara would ever take me back,” he said. Even reached across the table and stroked his knuckles.  
“She won’t get the chance. I’m keeping you forever.”

By the next afternoon, Isak was nervous all over again. He was waiting outside of the building for Jon, who was supposed to be here five minutes ago, fuck, what if he was in the wrong place?  
Three minutes later, a car rolled up, and Jon hopped out with his backpack dragging on the ground behind him. “Hei!” Isak exclaimed and, crap, did he sound too excited?  
Jon looked up at him. His hair was dark and straight and sticking out all over the place from under his hat. He was frowning as he said, “Halla.”  
The small boy walked by, still dragging his bag, and started walking up the stairs. Isak followed after a dazed second. “So… what do you usually do after school?”  
Jon shrugged from ahead of him.  
Not knowing what to do, Isak kept following him. When they got to Lise’s apartment, Jon turned to Isak and stared at him, waiting for him to open the door. Isak stared back. Shit. Fuck.  
“How about we go up to my apartment for a minute?” he suggested. Jon looked like a marshmallow all puffed up in his jacket and he let out a sigh.  
“Did you forget the key?”  
Isak nodded. “It’ll just be a minute.” He thought of telling Jon he could wait down here, but then he thought of telling Lise that Jon had been kidnapped when he wasn’t looking.  
Sighing again, Jon let Isak lead the way up the stairs. Once they got to his apartment, he unlocked it with a little bit off trouble and then they walked in. Jon looked around.  
“It’s messy in here,” he observed. Isak flushed a little and nodded. At the sound of them coming in, Baz came bounding into the room. He was bigger now, almost up to Isak’s knees, and Even loved wrestling around with him. He still followed Cardamom around, although he towered over her. As soon as the dog came in, Jon lit up.  
“Oh, wow! You have a dog!” he exclaimed excitedly. Isak nodded.  
“Ja, ja, his name is Baz.” He tried to move past the dog, who was sniffing him excitedly, in order to get to the other room and find the key. “We have a cat, too.”  
“We?” Jon asked, looking up at him. “Oh, you and that tall boy.”  
Snorting, Isak nodded. “Ja, Even.”  
“Is he your best friend?” Jon asked, and Isak felt something sick spread through his stomach because now he didn’t know what to do. “I wish I lived with my best friend. Instead I have to live with my mom.”  
“Your mom’s pretty cool,” Isak replied immediately. Then he bit his lip. “And Even’s… Even’s actually my boyfriend.”  
“Boyfriend?” Jon repeated, looking up from Baz, who’d made his way over to him.  
“Mmhmm.”  
Jon looked back down at Baz, scratching behind his ear. “So… your like the dog’s dads?”  
Smiling, Isak nodded.  
“Can I meet your cat?” Jon asked. Isak nodded again, walking towards the bedroom. He scrambled to shove the lube and the pack of condoms on their bedside tabel into the drawer, unsure if Jon would even recognize them but not willing to take the chance. Then he lifted Cardamom off of the bed and and walked her over to Jon, putting her down by his feet. He leaned down and stuck out one hand, smiling as she sniffed it. “What’s its name?”  
“Cardamom,” Isak replied, riffling around for the key.  
“I always want to get a pet, but mom says no. We have a dumb fish, but he doesn’t do anything.”  
“Maybe you’ll get a pet when you get older,” he shrugged. “I never had any pets growing up, look at me now.”  
Jon nodded and continued to play with the pets. Eventually, Isak found the key. “Alright, we can go back down to yours,” he said, and the boy frowned.  
“Can’t we stay up here?” he asked, and Isak scrunched up his nose.  
“I think your mom wants you doing homework and stuff. We should probably go down.”  
Jon huffed out another sigh, annoyed again, and didn’t budge from his spot petting Baz. Feeling himself losing control over the situation, Isak tried to come up with a quick fix. “I mean… maybe if you finish your homework, we can take Baz for a walk?”  
Looking up, Jon raised his eyebrows. “Really?” he asked.  
Isak nodded. “I mean, if it’s okay with your mom.”  
“Okay. Let’s go, I don’t want her to get home before I’m finished.”  
Laughing through his nose, Isak nodded and followed the boy as he hurried back downstairs. Once they got into his apartment, he dropped his bag right in the entryway. “Can I have a snack?”  
Isak walked into the kitchen behind him and immediately grabbed the instructions Lise had left him on the counter. There was her phone number and she’d said to text her when they got there, so he quickly did that. Then it said Jon could have one, non-dessert snack after lunch, so Isak said back, “Yeah.” He didn’t want to have to say anything about the non-dessert part, feeling like the bad guy, so he was happy when Jon went for a cup of applesauce. He noted that there wasn’t much food to be found around the house. In fact, there wasn’t much of anything. Jon stood on his tiptoes to get a spoon out of the silverware drawer and then looked at Isak. He looked so young with his applesauce and his eyes poking out from under the brim of that too-big hat. “Wanna see my room?”

“So this is me, and that’s my mom, and that’s my friend Julian,” Jon explained, pointing carefully at each of the figures he’d drawn. His room was messy but still too-empty, lacking in toys and furniture. His bed was covered in transformer sheets and there were clothes lying about, including the coat and hat the boy had just been wearing. Now he was leaning over his dresser to point up at his drawing. It was pinned up over a crack in the forest green paint.  
“They’re really good,” Isak nodded. He had no idea what was good for a seven year old, but it he could tell who was an adult and who was a child, and he could tell Lise was a girl from her pink dress, so he figured that was a step in the right direction.  
“Thanks. And that’s my NBA poster,” he pointed above the drawing. The poster was clearly one of those rip-out ones from a magazine, creased in all the wrong places and way too thin, but Isak could tell Jon was proud of it.  
“That’s so cool. You know, my best bud loves the NBA,” he said. Jon smiled.  
“Who?”  
“Her name is Sana, and she’s the coolest person I know. I bet she’d really love your poster.”  
“Really?”  
“Yeah.”  
Still smiling, Jon walked over to the other side of the room, where he had a bin full of little knick knacks shoved into a corner. He picked up some old action figures, and their paint was fading away and scuffed up and Isak assumed they’d belonged to somebody else at some point. This whole place felt eerily similar to his childhood home, except it seemed warmer somehow. He reached in and pulled out what looked to be a plastic mailman, except he’d scribbled over the mail uniform with a black sharpie. “This one is my favorite. His name is Joseph and he plays for the Miami Heat. He used to be a mailman,” Jon said, staring at the smiling figure with eyes a little sad and a little lost. “But then he worked out, and he starting playing basketball. When he first started playing, all the other basketball players were like, ‘You’re just a mailman. You can’t play basketball.’ But he just worked really hard, and now…” Jon looked up at Isak. “Now he’s the best of them all. And his mom comes to all his games.”  
Blinking, Isak looked between Jon and his toy. “That’s a really cool story,” he said after a beat. The boy nodded and dropped the figure back into the bin.  
“I’m done with my snack. I can do my homework now.”

Jon set up his work around the kitchen table, setting it up in some sort of pattern that made sense only to him. He was doing his work meticulously, holding his big child’s pencil in one hand and a rubber eraser in the other. “Do you need help?” Isak asked, not really knowing what to do with himself. The boy shrugged.  
“Not right now,” he said slowly, not looking up from his work, “but probably later. I’m bad at school.”  
Isak got them both a glass of water and sat down across from Jon. “What do you like to do in school?” he asked.  
“Well, I like recess. And I like lunch. I don’t like class. I’m pretty stupid, so my teacher doesn’t really like me.”  
Blinking, Isak tried to come up with a response. Jon didn’t seem sad or pitiful about what he’d said, he was still just slowly making his way through his worksheet. “Hey, you,” he finally settled on. “You’re not stupid. You’re good at drawing, right? And you came up with that cool story?”  
Again, Jon shrugged. His hair, out from the hat now, was still stuck out every which way. He drew a small spiral in the margin of his paper before getting back to his work.  
They chatted a bit, but mostly it was quiet. After a while, Jon finished up and carefully filed all the worksheets back into his folder. “Can we walk your dog now?” he asked. Isak nodded.  
“Just let me ask your mom if that’s okay.”  
“Okay.” Getting up, Jon put his folder into his bag. Then he walked to the fridge and took out a few tupperwares filled up with what looked like baby carrots, chicken nuggets, and maybe fruit snacks or something. He grabbed his lunch box and put them all inside with an icepack.  
By the time he was done, Lise had responded to Isak and given him the go ahead on walking Baz. “Alright, your mom says that’s fine. Get on your coat and we’ll head out.”  
“Yes!” Jon exclaimed, running to his room. Isak smiled and grabbed his own coat from the chair he’d left it on, zipping up.  
Once they were both dressed warmly enough, they walked back up to Isak’s apartment and found Baz sleeping on the couch.  
“Come on, buddy,” Isak said, kneeling and ruffling his fur. He woke up excitedly, licking at Isak’s face. “That’s a good boy. Let’s go on your walk now, eh?”  
Jon watched with a smile as Baz hopped off the couch and Isak clipped his leash to his collar. “Here, we usually just go around the block a couple of times, until he goes to the bathroom.”  
“I wish I had a dog,” Jon sighed mournfully. Isak faltered.  
“Well… you know you’re welcome to walk Baz with us anytime.”  
“Really?!” Jon asked, looking up with so much hope in his eyes that Isak wanted to cry.  
“Yeah, of course. I’m sure Even would love to meet you, too.”  
“What’s he like?” Jon asked.  
Isak smiled fondly at the thought of Even. “Well, he’s a lot like you. He’s creative. He loves to draw and write stories. And he’s funny and he’s brave and he’s smart. Although he wasn’t too good in some of his school subjects, either. But he’s the smartest person I know.”  
“He’s really tall,” Jon noted after a beat. Isak scoffed.  
“He’s not that tall. Don’t give him too much credit.”  
“He’s taller than you,” Jon said with a little sass. Isak chuckled.  
“Not that much taller.”  
“I wanna be really tall when I grow up,” said Jon. “Mom says my dad was the tallest man she’d ever met.” Jon looked up from Baz and stared Isak dead in the eye as he asked, “Did you know my dad is dead?”  
Isak didn’t really know what to say. Eventually, he settled on, “No. No, I didn’t know that.”  
Jon nodded. “He died before I was born. Mom says he was the most handsome man in the universe. She says I look just like him. Do you look like your dad?”  
Looking away, Isak nodded slightly. “A little,” he said. “But more like your mom. I think you look a little bit like your mom, too.”  
Jon shrugged. He seemed to do that a lot. “Can we walk him now?”  
“Yeah,” Isak nodded. “Yeah, we can walk him.”  
The walk was nice, cool and pleasant. Isak let Jon hold the leash a couple of times and, each time, the little boy squealed with delight whenever Baz ran ahead a little too quickly. “Woah, he’s so strong!” he said at one point. Isak laughed.  
“You should’ve seen him a few months ago. He was tiny.”  
“Really? He’s that little?”  
“Yeah, he’s really little.”  
Jon stared at Baz in wonder. “Is he going to get bigger?”  
“I don’t know,” Isak shrugged. “Maybe.”  
“What about the cat?”  
“She’s older, but she’s not getting any bigger. She’s just gonna be tiny forever.”  
“She’s not that tiny,” Jon said. Isak gasped.  
“Excuse me, she is a baby!”  
Shrugging, Jon and petted Baz, who’d stopped to sniff a bush. As soon as Jon touched him, however, he started licking at the boy, and Isak smiled. He pulled out his phone and took a photo, sending to Even quickly. 

Isak: [attachment: one photo]  
Isak: he has a new favorite  
Even Kosegruppa<3: what nooo

Isak: yesss  
Isak: when are you home tonight?  
Even Kosegruppa<3: 18  
Isak: ugh  
Isak: I miss you  
Even Kosegruppa<3: miss you too baby  
Even Kosegruppa<3: hows Jon?  
Isak: great  
Isak: really good kid  
Isak: I told him he could start walking Baz with us if he wanted. Hope that’s ok. He’s just such a sweet kid and they don’t have any pets and I don’t think they have much money, just thought he’d like it. Something to look forward to.   
Even Kosegruppa<3: baby of course that’s okay. I’m excited to meet this kid who had apparently charmed the hell out of you.  
Isak: haha, you know I love charm;)  
Even Kosegruppa<3: true;)  
Even Kosegruppa<3: see you soon sweetie  
Isak: see you soon  
By the time Lise got back, Isak and Jon were in Jon's room, and Jon was explaining all his action figures. “Mama!” the boy exclaimed as soon as the door opened and closed. Isak got up and followed him out of the room. “Mama, did you know Isak has a dog and a cat? And I playstation!”  
Lise scooped him up, kissing his cheek. “Really?” she asked. “Wow, that sounds so cool, baby!” She smiled as Isak as Jon continued to ramble, going on about Baz and the the way he’d been so excited when they were walking him and how Baz was Even’s and how Cardamom was Isak’s but they both loved them both. “I’m glad you had a nice time, sweetie,” Lise whispered, putting him down. “Why don’t you go set the table for dinner, okay?”  
“Okay,” Jon replied, shooting off towards the kitchen. Lise walked to Isak.   
“Thank you so much for today,” she said, reaching into her purse and pulling out her checkbook. Isak shook his head.   
“Nei, it’s fine,” he said, holding up his hands. Lise frowned.   
“Stop, of course I’m paying you.”  
“Lise, seriously. I had a great time. It’s fine. I don’t… I don’t need you to pay me.”  
Looking around, Lise seemed to consider this. She was probably thinking of what else she could do with the money, Finally, she asked, “Are you sure?”  
“Yes,” Isak replied. “Yes, of course.”  
Smiling, she reached up and gave him a hug. Isak smiled. “Thank you so much,” she breathed into his ear. “Jon usually doesn’t get along great with men. I’m so glad that he had such a good time with you.”  
“Yeah,” Isak nodded. “He’s a great kid.”  
Pulling away, Lise nodded, beaming. “He is.”

When Even got home, he wasn’t surprised to find Isak watching something on TV, eyes a little bored. “Hei, baby.”  
“Hei,” Isak called back. “How was work?”  
“It was fine,” Even replied. “How was babysitting?”  
“Really good, actually,” Isak nodded. “Jon is a great kid.”  
“Really?”  
“Yeah,” he nodded. “He wants to meet you.”  
“Yeah? Were you talking about m,e?” Even smiled, teasing. Isak rolled his eyes.   
“He asked. He thinks you’re very tall.”   
Chuckling, Even sat beside him on the bed, pulling Isak close to him. “He’s not wrong,” he mumbled into the younger boy’s hair. Isak grinned.   
He’d always wanted daughters because little boys… well, he didn’t have many good memories of little boys. But now, thinking about when Jon had gotten startled from Baz barking a little too loud and grabbed Isak’s hand in surprise, Isak smiled. He looked up at Even and pictured him with a little boy, and his smile pulled even wider. Even looked down and caught his gaze. “What?” he laughed. Still smiling, Isak shook his head.  
“Nothing.”


	70. Chapter seventy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hiiii omg so sorry it's been so long, there's been a lot going on, plus I couldn't think of anything to write about because I feel like I've really exhausted their whole dynamic, so I decided to skip forward a few years and this happened! I hope you all like it!!

Chapter 70  
“Isak?” Even called, shaking off his coat and tossing it over one of their chairs. “Is?”  
The apartment was eerily quiet and Even was fairly sure it was empty, which was weird considering Isak should’ve been home from uni a while ago. Taking out his phone, Even checked to see if his boyfriend had texted anything about going out, but there weren’t any messages. He dropped his wallet and keys on their bed next to Baz, who was sleeping heavily, before flicking on the lights. That’s when he noticed the new addition to the collage on their wall. There was something pinned up in the middle on a notebook piece of paper. Even frowned, walking to it.  
Removing it from the wall, Even read the paper. “At Jonas’s. Meet me. Love you.”  
Even frowned. He didn’t know why Isak wouldn’t just text him this, although sometimes, very very, veryy rarely, his boyfriend could be given to spontaneous bouts of creativity. Not that this was even very creative. It was just weird. Pulling out his phone again, Even typed a quick message. “Hey, what’s going on? What’s with the weird note?”  
The response was almost instant. “Hei baby, just come to Jonas’s. Love you.”  
“Okay?” Even replied, wondering if Isak had committed some sort of crime and that’s why he was being so skittish and hiding out at Jonas’s. He gathered up his stuff again and headed back out. 

There was another little note taped to Jonas’s door, on the same notebook paper and scrawled in Isak’s same handwriting. “Let yourself in,” this one read. Even huffed out a laugh. By now he was fairly certain Isak and the boys were planning something, some sort of prank maybe. It was summer, so they were all home, all except Magnus, who was staying over in the States until August. Besides his few summer courses and all the time he and Even spent alone together, Isak had been spending every waking minute with Mahdi and Jonas, just like old times. Even loved it.  
“Isak? Jonas?” he said upon entering the house, kicking off his shoes and looking around. It was dark in here, too.  
He noticed a light towards the back of the house, in the kitchen. Following it, he found himself still alone but surrounded by little pieces of paper. They were all over every the counter. When Even started looking at them, he didn’t really understand.  
“Bought food without me asking.”  
“Prettiest smile in the whole world. Fucking beautiful.”  
“So smart. Amazing artist.”  
“Got cardamoms throw up out of the carpet.”  
Those were just a few. After reading each one, he put it back where it had been. They seemed to be about him. Some of them were random- “Didn’t kill our plants”- whereas others were incrediably sweet- “Strongest boy I’ve ever met.”  
There must have been four dozen at least, each with a tiny note scribbled in shorthand. When he heard a noise behind him, Even spun around. Isak was leaning against the doorframe, nervously fiddling with another piece of paper. This one was bigger than the scraps all around them. They locked eyes, and Isak smiled, flushed. “Those are just some of them,” he said.  
Even swallowed the lump in his throat. “Some of what?” he asked.  
Glancing down, Isak skimmed his paper. “Some of my reasons.”  
Even didn’t speak, because this situation was seeming more and more surreal. Clearing his throat, Isak continued. “Um, I was really nervous to do this. Because we’re both young. And practically broke. So… the boys said I should come up with reasons why it’s a good idea and reasons why it’s a bad one. I started writing them down and, well… there weren’t many bad ones.”  
Even smiled, shaking his head with a wet little laugh that forced Isak to look up and laugh, too. His hair was unruly as ever, curling into his eyes, and his shirt was buttoned up one button higher than normal. He looked stunning, even though there were still bags under his eyes and his jeans were wrinkled and his shoes were a little scuffed. If this was headed where Even thought it was, he’d have to take a picture, because he wouldn’t ever want to forget what his boy looked like on this day.  
“Um… so I decided to do it. And I thought you should see all my reasons, although these are just a few of them. They’re really endless. But- but I thought you should see the ones I wrote down because,” Isak looked at his paper with a shrug, “because I think sometimes you still think you’re not good enough for me, and that’s absolutely not true. You’re the best thing that ever happened to me. You’re the best thing for me ever, you know? Nothing, nobody is better for me than you. Which is why…” looking up, he took a timid step forward and then awkwardly got down on one knee, holding his thigh for balance. Then he put the paper down and reached into his back pocket. “Which is why I wanted to ask if you,” taking a deep breath, he pulled out a ring. It was thin and pretty and perfect. “If you, Even Bech Næsheim, would marry me?”  
Isak’s face was earnest and nervous, which seemed insane to Even because he could hear his blood rushing in his ears, and he felt like his whole face was going to break in half from smiling so wide. Taking two long strides towards Isak, he got down on both knees and cupped the younger boy’s face in his hands. Isak stared back, licking his lips after a beat of silence. Even wanted to respond but he was ninety percent sure that if he tried to speak he would burst into tears, so he nodded.  
“Yeah?” Isak whispered.  
“Yeah,” Even whispered back, and he did start crying, making Isak laugh a little. They locked eyes for a moment, green to blue, and then Isak was pulling him into a hug, tight and warm and everything Even had been falling in love with, each day, for almost four years.  
After a long time, Isak laughed again, blinking wet lashes against Even’s neck. “I can’t believe you said yes,” he said.  
Even laughed, too, pulling away and wiping at the smaller boy’s tears with his thumb. “Did you think I would say no?” he asked, grinning ear to ear and unashamedly crying. He tilted his head, smiling at the way Isak placed his own hand over Even’s, holding them both to the side of his face.  
“I just… so we’re actually getting married?”  
“I guess so.”  
“I cannot believe that.”  
“You’re the one who asked me, Isak.”  
Rolling his eyes, Isak stood, bringing Even with him and then falling into his chest to be wrapped in another hug. “I know. It wasn’t as good as I planned. I was gonna leave you clues and stuff, but I couldn’t think of anything. Then I was gonna ask you more… I don’t know, confidently. I just got so nervous.”  
“Why were you nervous, angel? How could I ever say no to you?”  
Shrugging, Isak looked up. “Everyone was surprised I was asking. They all thought you would be the one to ask me.”  
“Really?”  
“You’re the romantic one.”  
Laughing, Even leaned down and pressed a peck to Isak’s squishy nose. “You’re plenty romantic. Now put that ring on me.”  
Wiggling his eyebrows, Isak gave a little solute. “Yes, sir.” He took Even’s hand and started to put the ring on his finger. “I hope it fits. I didn’t even know rings had sizes. Eva had to tell me. We got the biggest one, since you have huge hands.”  
Laughing, Even held up his hand, ring now successfully on, and showed it off. “Looks like it fits. Although I might have to give it back, now that you’ve insulted my hands.”  
“It wasn’t an insult. You know I like them,” Isak smirked.  
“That’s true,” Even nodded, before leaning in and giving Isak a kiss that turned long and slightly heated, their first official kiss as fiances. When they broke apart, Isak was flushed and smiling.  
“So, Eva helped you pick out the ring?”  
“Eva and Vilde and Sana. It took forever. Everyone helped, really. We made a groupchat about it. Magnus and Noora were absolutely livid that they were missing it. Mags especially.”  
“What did they do?”  
“The girls helped pick the ring, the guys did about everything else. They’re already planning our bachelor parties.”  
“Bachelor parties?” Even asked, amused.  
“Ja. Eva, Chris, Sana, Noora, Vilde, Jonas, Mahdi, Magnus, Eskild and Linn, as well as some of my uni friends, are on the list for mine, and Mikael, Yousef, Elias, Mutta, Adam, Mahdi, Magnus, Jonas, May and Sana are on the list for yours. So far. They said they’d all like to come to both, but then what would the point be of having two separate parties?”  
“What if I don’t want two separate parties?” Even pouted, pulling Isak close and burrowing his face in the younger boy’s soft hair. “What if I want to spend every night for the rest of my life by your side?”  
“Talk to them. You’d be surprised how much ‘planning’ is already done. I wouldn’t be surprised if they had already picked a location for the wedding.”  
Even smiled, giddy and dazed at the very words. “The wedding,” he repeated.  
Nodding, Isak smiled back, teeth gappy and adorable as ever. “The wedding.”  
They stood their for a while long, exchanging a few more kisses and never really letting go of the other. After ten minutes or so, Even looked around. “Um, baby?” he asked. Isak tilted his head. “Why are we at Jonas’s?”  
“Oh,” the smaller boy said, as if he’d forgotten. “Here, come on.” He took Even’s hand and lead him towards the backdoor. Making a hurt noise, Even reached back for all of Isak’s reasons. The younger boy rolled his eyes. “The boys’ll bag them up by the time we get back, don’t worry,” he said.  
After walking through Jonas’s backyard and into the woods, they finally arrived at a little clearing. There was a treehouse and Isak immediately started climbing up into it, making Even follow with a soft chuckle.  
“You know this place,” Isak said once they were both seated in the little house, leaning his head on Even’s shoulder.  
“Mmhmm. This is where you first told me you loved me.”  
“Yep. It was during Jonas’s New Year's party and we wanted to get away for a bit, so I took you here.”  
“That was a special night.”  
“Yeah. I was going to ask you here, but… but, if you said no… I didn’t want to ruin this memory. Not that I thought you’d say no. I just… I don’t know.”  
“I could’ve never said no. I love you so, so much,” Even said quietly.  
Isak scooched away slightly, turning to face Even. “I love you, too,” he said. ‘Which is why I wanted to bring you here. Because I still love you, all these years later. Probably even more than I did then, although I can’t imagine not being this much in love with you, Even. Man of my dreams. My fiance.”  
Even couldn’t not smile, starting to cry again, because this was all so Isak. So well-planned and yet still a little disjointed and awkward because he’d put padding for for potential error everywhere, always worried for the worst. It was so thoughtful and amazing and cute and dorky and so, so, undeniably Isak. So he reached forward and nodded, cupping Isak’s face. “My beautiful fiance.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is one of a series of epilogues, bc I love them too much to let go<3


	71. NOT A CHAPTER

Hii!!  
So...... I am thinking of starting an mpreg fic. It would be separate from this one bc I have other plans for this, but yeah. I've never even considered mpreg before, it always seemed very strange to me (idk why) but I've been thinking recently it's really no different from any other AU, it's just an AU where guys can get pregnant, and why is that weird/wrong? So I'm very heavily considering it because I love the science of pregnancy and prenatal care and I think there's really something magic about being pregnant. So would anyone be interested in reading it/ does anyone have any ideas?  
<3 love always


	72. Chapter seventy-one

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So this is the second of the epilogues! I hope you like it, I always feel shitty at writing weddings but I gave it my best.  
> Plus, thank you all sm for helping me make my decsion about the new fic! I've started it and it's abt 5 chapter long rn, it's in my works and it's called "I think I might be pregnant" if you wanna check it out. Love you all sm!

Chapter 71

The wedding was beautiful. 

They had it in the Spring (“Issy, spring symbolizes new beginnings!” “But this isn’t a beginning, this is a continuation!” “That’s sweet but we’re having it in Spring. Fight me.”) and all the flowers were in full bloom. The day began with Even sneaking out of their flat, because he wouldn’t allow them to see each other until the ceremony. When Isak woke up, he was confused, but the dozens of love letters Even had texted him cleared things up and made him less grumpy. At noon, he went to Jonas’s to get is tux- Even had refused to allow them to see what the other was wearing, too- and they, along with Magnus and Mahdi, shared a beer.  
“Fuck, remember when I introduced Even and you all stared like he had two heads?” Isak asked, laughing. Magnus bolted upright from his slouch.  
“Fy faen, I’d forgotten who he was and I just kept wondering why you knew a super hot third year! Then I remembered and I almost died! I mean, Isak, none of us expected him to be that good looking!”  
“Gee, thanks,” Isak said, making wide eyes and shaking his head back and forth.  
Mahdi laughed. “He scared me, man. He was so tall and cool!”  
“How did he scare you?! He said like three words!”  
“Yeah, but he was so smooth about it!”  
“All I remember is that dumb look you had on your face,” Jonas added. “You were so embarrassed.”  
“Because I was nervous! And because I wanted you to like each other! And because you’re right, Even is cool, and you guys are not,” Isak laughed.  
“Hey!” Magnus defended.  
“I knew how serious it was then. You’d never cared what we thought of a girl, or what she thought of us,” Jonas continued.  
“Well, I can think of a good reason for that,” Isak said, rolling his eyes.  
“Remember when you came out to us!?” asked Magnus excitedly. Isak knew what they were doing was cliche and a little too sentimental, but it was his fucking wedding day, goddammit. “‘Maybe I’m a little gay,’” the blond boy teased. Isak flushed.  
“I was stressed!” Isak said with indignance. “Jonas said you guys would be chill but I was freaking out!”  
“Did you really think we’d care, man?” Mahdi asked, shaking his head.  
“I don’t know. I mean, we were highschool boys and all we talked about was girls and weed!”  
Jonas stood. “Does anyone want another beer?”  
“Nei, I’m okay,” Isak shook his head.  
The afternoon went on in a similar way. Eventually, they started to get ready. The boys were all in navy blue suits with black ties, and Isak was in a black tux with a navy blue tie. “We look kind of like church toddlers,” the green eyed boy said once they were dressed.  
“You picked these out, dude,” Jonas laughed, and Isak rolled his eyes.  
“Even picked these out. I’m not creative enough to come up with shit like color schemes.”  
“He chose the food, too, right? I hope we’re not eating crappy pizza and ramen,” Mahdi said while tying his tie.  
“Nei, the food’s gonna be good as fuck. Trust me, you’re gonna love it. Don’t you think I have a ‘more sophisticated palate,’” Isak said in English, “after being with Even for four fucking years.”  
“‘More sophisticated palate,” Jonas imitated. “You mean getting spoiled by homecooked meals every day?”  
“Ja,” Isak nodded. “Don’t act like you weren’t all at our place almost every night since we moved in together. You’re just as spoiled as I am.”  
“He’s got us there, man,” Mahdi laughed. Just then, Magnus walked out of the bathroom, where he’d been using the mirror instead of squeezing in with everyone else in front of the floor length in the bedroom.  
“Uh, guys? I think I fucked up my tie.”  
All three boys groaned. “Dude, you’re in your twenties, you’ve got to learn how to tie a tie,” Mahdi laughed.  
“I do know how! I just- this one was hard, okay? It’s made of some fancy material. Isak, where did Even get this material?”  
“Magnus, you were there when we tried them on,” said Jonas. Isak was laughing, smiling, and he knew that they all looked handsome as fuck, the ultimate squad, and what else could he ask for?

Things with Even were going equally well.  
He was at Sana’s, with the balloon boys, who made a video to commemorate the occasion. “We can’t post it until after the wedding, though,” Even said. “Isak isn’t allow to see me.”  
“He’s not going to watch the video, man,” Elias laughed. Even raised his eyebrows.  
“Trust me. He’s subscribed and he will literally stop everything to watch this video.”  
“What are we talking about?” asked Mikael, slinging both arms around Elias and Even’s necks.  
“Isak watching our video. Even doesn’t want him to see before the wedding since they’re not supposed to see each other.”  
“That’s sweet!” Mikael exclaimed, threading his fingers through Even’s. He was so affectionate again, finally, although it had taken a while. He was still the most affectionate with Adam, though. Even had a sneaking suspicion why.  
Speaking of the older boy, he came up just now to tug Mikael off of him and Elias by the waist. “Did I do my tie right?” he asked, holding Mikael to his chest.  
“Ja, it looks fine,” Elias assured him.  
“Fine?”  
“Good. Normal.”  
“Well does it look fine or good?”  
“Great, it looks amazing,” Even cut in, walking by and patting his shoulder. “Where are Yousef and Mutta?”  
“Sana came home you Yousef followed her away like a lost puppy, I don’t know where Mutta is,” Adam replied.  
“Sana’s here?” Even asked, lighting up. Elias groaned.  
“Why does everyone like her more than me? She’s not even cool.”  
“Elias, mama couldn’t teach you to tie your shoes until the fifth grade, I think I’m a little cooler than you,” Sana, who happened to be passing through, said. All the boys ohed.  
“You just got roasted, man!” Adam laughed, just as Yousef walked in.  
“Halla,” he said, flipping back his hair. “What did I miss?”  
“Even’s being soft,” Mikael explained.  
“By the way,” Sana said, returning from the kitchen with a carrot, “Isak says to say hi, and that he misses you, and that he’s mad you snuck out this morning, but that he’s not really mad and he loves you.” She munched her carrot matter-of-factly. “These all came through as different texts. I thought he was dying.”  
Even tilted his head, pouting slightly. “He’s so cute. Tell him I miss him and love him, too.”  
Rolling her eyes, Sana pulled out her phone and started typing. After a few seconds, she said, “He says, ‘Haha, Magnus fucked up his tie, Mahdi and Jonas are playing FIFA and Mahdi keeps getting mad at Mags for distracting him, and Jonas won’t stop telling me that you’re going to make everyone else’s weddings look bad. Help.’”  
“Is Jonas getting married?” asked Elias.  
“Nei, he’s just ranting. He’s probably nervous for Isak,” Even shook his head.  
“I got it!” Mutta suddenly yelled, running in huffing. “I found it.”  
“Found what?” asked Even as they all turned to face him. Mutta was holding up a photo album, one that, Even realized with dread, was full of photos from their first year at Bakka. “Fy faen, guys,” he laugh-groaned.  
“I knew I had it around here!” Elias said, bounding over excitedly. All the boys gathered around.  
“Did you really all send Mutta on a quest to dig this up?” Even asked, looking over the huddle.  
“It’s your wedding day and you’re gonna have pictures of you guys! This one was iconic!” Mikael argued.  
They flipped through it until they found the picture that everyone was waiting for. It was Even’s polaroid that they usually used to take these pictures, so he himself was rarely in them. But there was one of him, probably fifteen, in a pink adidas sweater, fuzzy, floppy hair all over his forehead, smiling that big old smile of his with braces on full display, very excitedly holding up a peace sign with his nails painted robin’s egg blue. “You look five years old,” Yousef said in that teasing, high pitched way of his, and Adam had his face on the table he was laughing so hard.  
“You were so excited about the nails!” said Elias.  
“Mikael was the one who painted them, I was just happy!” Even defended, laughing. The picture was funny.  
“What’s going on?” asked Sana, walking over and shoving between them. As soon as she saw the photo, she burst into that pretty dimpled smile. “You have to show this to Isak,” she said, looking up at him. “Oh my god, I remember that day! I was in grade eight and I was with Jamilla and she was doing my nails when you all burst in and stole our nailpolish!”  
“Aw, was little Sana upset?” Elias teased, wrangling her shoulders. She shoved him away.  
“Nei! Clearly Even liked it more than I would have anyway. And, seriously, if you don’t show this to Isak I will.”  
“Not today! He can’t see me today!” Even said frantically, making Sana roll her eyes and hold up her hands in surrender.  
When boys disappeared into the other room, however, she took a quick picture of the album. 

Sanasol: Hallo  
Sana: You’re welcome

Isak picked up his phone. She’d sent him a picture- and oh my god it was the most adorable picture of Even in the world, what the fuck? 

Isak: WHERE DID YOU GET THAT  
Sanasol: family photo album  
Isak: WHAT  
Isak: ARE THERE MORE  
Sanasol: Chill best bud  
Sanasol: There are probably more, idk  
Sanasol: they were making fun of him abt this one  
Sanasol: but you can’t tell him I showed you it  
Isak: why not????  
Sanasol: He doesn’t want you to see him at ALL before the ceremony  
Sanasol: But I figured I’d toss you a bone since you’re desperate  
Isak: THIS IS MORE THAN A BONE  
Isak: THIS IS LIKE A WHOLE BOWL OF DOG FOOD  
Sanasol: Dog food?!  
Isak: Because you toss a bone to a dog  
Isak: that’s where the expression comes from  
Isak: but the dog would like a whole bowl of dog food better  
Sanasol: um.. Ok  
Sanasol: anyway, gotta go.  
Isak: ok  
Isak: takk sana  
Sana: no problem <3

Isak put down his phone before picking it back up and staring at the picture a bit more. After a beat, he stood. “Fy faen, guys, look at this!” 

They had the ceremony in the evening, starting at five.  
It was beautiful, really, the whole place was stunning and glowing with the string lights that dangled over the beams, outside and right on the lake, but Isak couldn’t take it all in because he was more nervous than he’d ever been in his life.  
“Fuck, is it normal to be this nervous?” he asked Jonas, who was standing right beside him.  
“I guess? I don’t know, man,” Jonas replied. He put one hand on Isak’s shoulder. “WHy are you nervous? You’re not getting cold feet are you?”  
“Nei!” Isak said immediately. “Nei, oh my god, nei. But just like… I’m just anxious. Like, this is a big deal, right?”  
“Of course. But look, man, this is all going to be perfect, okay? And then you and Even will have the happily ever after that you deserve. It’s going to be fine.”  
Isak nodded, taking a deep breath. Just then, the music began to play. “Looks like it’s go time,” Jonas said.  
Everyone got in order. When Isak’s mom and dad came up to him, they both looked happy. There was such an energy in the air.  
“You look so handsome, Isak,” his mom said, reaching up to touch his hair. His dad nodded with approval.  
Even’s little cousin walked out first, tossing yellow petals. Then it was Magnus and Elias, Mahdi and Yousef, Jonas and Mutta, and Mikael and Adam. Isak followed, his parents on both arms. Once he got to the rose-covered archway, his mom kissed his cheek and his dad gave him a firm hug. And then he stepped up, right in front of Jonas, and turned, and all of his nervousness vanished.  
Even looked… stunning.  
As in, Isak had never laid eyes on anything more beautiful.  
And his smile. His smile could light up worlds.  
With his mom and dad on each arm, he made his way down the aisle, but he never took his eyes off of Isak.  
Once he got to his boy, he immediately reached out and took his hand. “Halla,” he said, still smiling. Isak smiled back.  
“Halla.”  
The man who was marrying them cleared his throat and began to speak, but Isak barely heard him. He and Even were still holding hands, both of them now, and Even was hunched over slightly, as if he wanted to rest their foreheads against each other. Isak might’ve popped on his tippy toes. Now they were only inches away.  
Eventually, they were asked to say their vows. Even tilted his head. “I’ve forgotten mine,” he whispered, and Isak giggled softly. “I guess I’ll wing it.”  
Now speaking at a normal volume, he continued. “Isak… I love you. I love you so much. For a long time, I thought… I thought that it was just you alone, in your head, when you get down to it. But you… you taught me that… I’m not alone. And you saved me.  
“I wish I could make you physically feel how much I love you, because I think only then could you understand. But I can’t do that, so I’m going to have to settle for showering you in love and affection every day for the rest of my life.  
“I’m not quite sure how to end this, because I feel like I could go on forever. But I know I wanted to talk about how much I love your hair, your squishy nose, your teeth. Your laugh and your smile and your irrational fear of driving. I love your grumpiness and your softness. I love that you’re the sweetest person I know, the most loving person I’ve ever met. I love you. I guess that’d a good way to end it, right? I love you, baby. I love you so, so much. My Isak.”  
Isak laughed wetly, squeezing his hands. “I love you,” he said back. “I love you, too.”  
There was a beat of silence during which Even stared at him with wide eyes. “Well?” he said after a beat. “Baby, your vows?”  
“Oh!” Isak turned red. “Oh, ja, uhm… okay. Well, Even, man of my dreams. I love you, too. I’ve known I loved you pretty much since they day you first came home with me and forced me to put on about fifteen layers because we’d just gone swimming,” he wiggled his eyebrows, “and you were sure I was going to catch a cold. I mean, you were so caring and kind and you saved me, too. You saved me, first. And through everything, through moving in together and getting pets and getting our first very own apartment, through uni and grad school, I’ve never once doubted that you’re the one. Because… it’s always been you, you know?” Isak swallowed. “It’s always been you.”  
The rest of the ceremony flew by. By the time they were kissing, Isak couldn’t remember what it felt like to be anxious and Even couldn’t remember what it felt like to lose control and neither boy could remember what it felt like to be scared.


End file.
